The "Nostalgic" Issue

Royal Holloway’s Official Student Publication, Est. 1986

Editor’sLetter

On “Nostalgic” -

I’m not the sort of person who is frequently struck with nostalgia for my own life. Instead, I fall into longing for different times; to witness the pages of my history books or the settings of my favourite novels all for my very own.

Orbital Board, 22/23

Editor-in-chief: Madelaine Gray

Deputy EIC: Hannah Armour

Senior News Editor: Courtney Bridges

Associate News Editor: Devesh Sood

Senior Opinion Editor: Emma Holly Associate Opinion Editor: Jethro Robathon

Senior Culture Editor: Olivia Taylor Associate Culture Editor: Shannon Gray

Senior Lifestyle Editor: Beth McCowen

Associate Lifestyle Editor: Millie Draper

Senior Sports Editor: Peter Vigh

Creative Writing Coordinator: Ellie Pritchard

Head Illustrator/Cover Design: Tabitha Turner

In-Text Illustrations: Meghan O’Brien

The views expressed within this magazine are not representative of Royal Holloway, University of London, or Royal Holloway Student's Union, or any author/editor except the individual who wrote the particular article.

As I get older, however, I find myself lamenting the passage of time–autumn, my favourite season, has disappeared far too quickly this year. The days of rust-toned leaves and crisp cold mornings slipped through my fingers; it’s only now, beset by endless days of grey skies and drizzled rain, that I want to shake my past self. Looking back further, I wonder what on earth I did with some of my days as a teenager–certainly nothing productive, or even noteworthily enjoyable. I’m unlikely to ever again have so few responsibilities, so much time, and yet, when I had it, all I yearned for was the future. Perhaps I’m nostalgic less for a different time and more for a different me. My optimism has waxed and waned as the years pass, and nothing fascinates me more than to read back on some old journal entries–how dramatic I could be, both in sadness and joy!

In all seriousness, I don’t seem to spend as much time as others dwelling on the past. I like looking forward, onward to what is to come–maybe, instead, that is my curse.

CONTENTS

Madelaine Gray

Devesh Sood Courtney Bridges

Sofia Bajerova Hannah Armour Emma Holly Olivia Taylor Madelaine Gray

Beth McCowen Elena Chiujdia

Peter Vigh Joe King Nelson Kalberer Ellie Pritchard

Emma Holly Ellie Pritchard

EDITOR'S LETTER 2 On 'Nostalgic' 4 THE MAIL IS IN news 4 The Changing of the Bobs 6 The Eras Tour and “Nostalgia Efect” OPINION 7 Nostalgia 8 Stupid Things Men Have Said to Me on Dating Apps 9 An Ode to my Mother CULTURE 10 The Narration of Sisterhood 12 A Love Letter to Four Weddings and a Funeral LIFESTYLE 13 Second Chances 14 Early 2000s Children SPORT 15 Nostalgia, Sport, and Parental Love CREATIVE WRITING 16 Just a Thought 17 A Moment 18 Transferware 19 Dear Grandma 20 To a Friend, in the Unlikely Event of Our Seperation. 22 DEAR DAVIDSON, 23 THE CROSSWORD

THEMAILISIN

Readers’ Letters, Tips, Comments

Nostalgia is a feeling that everyone can relate to. Can’t wait to see what kinds of articles people come up with for this theme!

- Anonymous

Visit Page 22 for "Dear Davidson", our resident advice guru and agony aunt.

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The Changing of the Bobs Devesh Sood

ASSOCIATE NEWS EDITOR

The resignation of the Disney CEO, Bob Chapek & the choice of his successor to be his predecessor, Bob Iger, was… unexpected. Coming out of the blue, and announced on a Sunday evening, it certainly took many by surprise. However, to say the writing was on the wall may be the biggest understatement of the last year. Iger’s tenure as CEO may just be one of the most celebrated with-

in the film industry; while he was certainly responsible for the growth of the Disney brand, particularly as he was the one responsible for the mergers with Pixar, Marvel, Lucasfilm & most recently 20th Century Fox, his career presented one major difference compared to most others within the same market; a respect & understanding for their artists. While there were definitely mistakes made during his initial time in power, most noticeably the firing of James Gunn, this one factor allowed Disney to great revenues whilst also creating films with a sense of passion, wander & most importantly, magic.

Upon announcement of his retirement in 2020, it was determined his successor would be Chapek. A very different individual compared to the one who had led the charge for the past 15 years, beginning his time with Disney within the home video division, and had just led the charge for Parks & Resorts; his past experience & recent success with the launch of the Galaxy’s Edge attraction allowed him to prove himself as the most suitable replacement. The pandemic was responsible for a long delay, but Chapek eventually took the mantle of CEO, and had let it be known that this would be a new era for Disney.

The parks saw some of the biggest troubles, including the raising of admission prices & increased restrictions to their loyal consumers. Paired with rides in need of constant maintenance, reduced staffing numbers and long waiting queues, the new era at Disney seemed to be most accurately represented by the introduction of the Genie+ Pass, a reimagined fast pass scheme with a cost that would weigh heavily on most, especially families, but would quickly prove a necessity in order to gain the full experience of the park.

Paired with matters such as the ‘Don’t Say Gay’ bill acted as continual reminders that some were unhappy with the man leading the charge. Controversial with it’s aim to ban discussions surrounding Gender Identity & Sexual Orientation amongst until the third grade, Chapek’s hesitation to respond (whilst continuing to profit from their parks in Florida) angered many, ultimately leading to employee walk-outs in protest. Eventually coming out against the bill, this was thought not only to be far too late, but resulted in the opposition, Ron DeSantis, to revoke Disney’s self-governing status within the state. Hence, of all the potential responses he could have taken, it seemed the one Chapek ended up going with was the one that would upset the most people.

Even separate from this, it seemed the one responsible for his growing unpopularity was Chapek himself. In June, he fired Peter Rice, a relatively well-liked, long time Fox Executive, and seen by many to be a potential successor to Chapek. Some sources suggest the meeting lasted around 7 minutes, and was seen by many to be a decision made from fear rather than through business. On top of this, Chapek recently suggested that animation was strictly designed for children, and not as much towards adults; these

comments proved to be confusing & upsetting for many, including his own employees. Pixar, in particular, may have seen the worst treatment, particularly during the pandemic. The introduction of Premiere Access on their streaming service meant films like Mulan & Black Widow could be watched on the service with an additional price attached. Yet, since 2020, 3 of Pixar’s 4 films have been sent to Disney+ with no additional charge, treated as streaming movies, which have been seen as demotivating. Hence, in hearing these comments, not only could this be seen as degrading for their employees, but it seems to defy the decades long effort Disney themselves have taken to subvert these ideas.

In terms of media, Chapek fully committed himself & his company to the ongoing streaming wars. Disney+, which had begun life under Iger, was able to draw a large number of subscribers, reaching 14.4 million in August, overtaking Netflix. In terms of output, though, there seemed to be a greater concern for quantity over quality. While only a few have under-performed from a viewer perspective, critical approval has been mixed. With their TV shows in particular, many have seen the same criticism; the stories told should be movies, but have been stretched to fill the runtime of a show.

In addition, as more competitors entered the market, there has been this feeling that a streaming bubble was growing; whilst all of these firms immediately leapt onto building their own service, few of them considered the potential expenses. This is the reason why both Netflix & HBO have been furiously cancelling & removing unnecessary shows. In looking at Disney+, it appears that a great potential for revenue to be earned has been lost with this service. Within 2022

alone, Disney+ has seen output like Disenchanted, a long awaited sequel to a beloved original film, Chip ‘n Dale: Rescue Rangers, a critically acclaimed film from The Lonely Island & Obi-Wan Kenobi, a series that saw the return of Ewan McGregor as the beloved character after over 15 years. As the desire and reality that comes with running a streaming service began to present itself, Chapek should have been the one to judge the potential benefits that come with releasing these properties on their service rather than in theatres, but never did.

Hence, upon hearing the poor report coming from the quarterly earnings of Q4, including a $1.5bn loss from Disney+, a replacement was necessary. Partially a PR move, bringing back Iger was a popular choice, boosting Disney’s stocks on the evening of the announcement. Taking charge for the next two years, many of his immediate changes seem to be with the intention of restoring the faith of their employees. Whilst it is unlikely that all of Chapek’s decisions will be reversed, one has to wonder whether even he has the power to correct the course Disney has been on in the last few years.

The Eras Tour and “Nostalgia Effect”

Taylor Swift’s re-emergence, and what is says for the music industry

Courtney Bridges

SENIOR NEWS EDITOR

Nostalgia: a sentimental longing or wistful affection for a period in the past.

Nostalgic: feeling, evoking, or characterised by nostalgia. Or, how you feel when listening to Taylor Swift..

From her first album, Taylor Swift to recently released Midnights (3am Edition), we have followed the artist through her teenage years, and now her 30s. We’ve witnessed themes of love, heartache, and self-discovery through her writing. And not just her own – her music has been used for cliché high-school crush soundtracks or moments that make you want to scream in the rain.

For listeners then, The Eras Tour provokes an all-encompassing feeling of nostalgia as referenced earlier. But the nostalgia evoked by Taylor Swift, extends beyond the music. It is in ‘22’ Taylor Swift themed birthday parties, or Instagram reels, album release listening sessions among groups of friends, and even university societies dedicated to sharing and celebrated their love for her as a singer-songwriter.

Her extensive reach was exemplified by huge success at the American Music Awards (AMA’s) – taking away all six awards in the categories she was nominated (Artist, Female Artist – Country, Female Artist Pop/Rock, Album – Country, Album – Pop/Rock, Video). In her acceptance speech for the award for the Best Album she touched on the

emotion of the album that perhaps brings listeners the biggest throwback – Red (Taylor’s version) in the re-recording of her work after that was committed to after master tapes were sold to a hedge fund by her previous record label:

“I cannot tell you how much my re-recorded albums mean to me, but I never expected or assumed that they would mean anything to you… So I can’t thank you enough for caring about this album that I’m so proud of.”

Thus, bringing fans back to the music that was representational of 2012, but also the artists own experience within the world of music, signposting obstacles overcome.

The news of winning these awards now takes her AMA total to 40. The release of Midnights making her the first artist in history to claim the top 10 slots on the Billboard Hot 100 chart in the US, surpassing Drake who previously held the record with nine of the top songs for a week in 2021. She also broke global Spotify records for the most streams of a single album in one day.

This signals not only the nostalgia of her past prominence as an artist, but the rise of female artists more broadly and the inter-female support within the music industry, as emphasised by the predominantly female support artist line-up we’re going to see in The Eras Tour, with special guests including: beabadoobee

Phoebe Bridgers girl in red MUNA

HAIM

GAYLE

Gracie Abrams

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an act aimed at uplifting other women around her, and a signal for what the industry is becoming: a space not just for competition as may appear with awards nights like these, or listening statistics on music platforms, but for celebration of creativity, growth, and support.

This is mirrored also in other pockets of society and culture, as seen in Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively’s relationship with the singer, after recently recalling the moment that their children realised ‘Aunt’ Taylor Swift was actually a global superstar. And even examples of other artists following suit, as Harry Styles placed the status of his drummer, Sarah Jones, above his own in interview on The Howard Stern Show.

So, this period of reflection on the nostalgic origins of Taylor Swift, her music, and the feelings it installs will hopefully be forever captured in a moment of its own. The increasing power and presence of women in music though is something we can hope does not become nostalgic, romanticised, or longed for but instead a continuous trend.

OPINION NOSTALGIA

Sofia Bajerova

Nostalgia: from the Greek Nostos meaning “return home” and Algos meaning “pain”. The word literally means the ‘suffering evoked by the desire to return to one’s place of origin’. Of course, today the word takes on a different meaning, yet there is definitely something to be said about the pain of looking back. The complex emotion of nostalgia often depends on our experience of the present. It’s ironic how a concept all about the past can be completely dictated by the present, and the prospect for the future. At times it can be hard to think back to a time when things were less complicated, less lonely, less painful - or just less. Knowing how good things once were can show you just how far you’ve fallen. It can make it seem impossible to claw your way back to that happy place. The present can make nostalgia become a reminder of torment and loss.

Then again, do we not romanticise the ‘good old days’? Those times when a Freddo was a reasonable price. When your main worry was what your parents had packed for your lunch.

We make the past seem better than it was, a little rosier, more worthy of our longing.

Perhaps we do it to make ourselves feel better, or the pain of the past slowly fades with time until we are only left with the ‘good’. Like a mother who keeps breaking the

promise she made to herself, never to go through the pain of childbirth again. Or like when you forget that just a month ago you swore you were done with education, but now you’re applying for a Masters.

We use the past to dictate how we feel about our experiences. On one hand, how can we assess the present without comparing it to what came before? How do we tell if we are happy without comparing it to that time we were distraught? Is there even a way to comprehend the post Covid-19 era without the comparison to the pre Covid-19 era?

But how do we manage expectations? Are we just holding ourselves back, trying to recreate something that can never be the same again? Longing for feelings, experiences and relationships that only have a place in the past. When we decide to go back to an ex, are we looking to create a new future or recreate the past? Hoping for familiarity from someone who is now a completely different person is like looking for the comfort of your childhood home after it has been rebuilt.

Often, we paint nostalgia as a warm friend. Memories in sepia tone with that aesthetic vintage border. The very illusion of past perfection. We forget the pain that is in its very essence; the longing it invokes that cannot be recreated. The pain of looking back on the ‘good old days’ during times that seem far from good. We need to unclasp ourselves from the grip of this romantic past that keeps us from looking forward and stops us from appreciating the present until it becomes another

memory. Perhaps the present and future are nothing without the past, but the past cannot fully dictate the future without keeping us in mind-forged fetters, preventing us from accessing the full potential of our future.

A warm friend or a bitter enemy?

Stupid Things Men Have Said to Me on Dating Apps

Hannah Armour

DEPUTY EDITOR IN CHIEF

Ishould start this by confessing something. I am banned from Tinder. I may, or may not have made a joke I was 15 in a message to a guy when in fact I was 19. As a result, my dating app of choice has been Hinge since then. For those unfamiliar with Hinge, you can see who likes your profile before you’ve seen theirs. The below, are all first messages I’ve received from men.

we cuddle up and binge watch Harry Potter together”)

Side note, what about me screams Harry Potter? I’ve never read the books.

Boring! Where’s the spice?: “So cuteee!”

“Gorgeous x”

Just say you have a ginger fetish. “Hey Ginge”

“Stunning red hair and a really sweet smile”

21 years with that name but this is the first time I’ve noticed! Sarcasm or not, where’s the originality?

“Pretty, tick. Great fashion sense (I love your outfits), tick. interests in common, tick. Cute smile, tick. sounds like a perfect match! Would love to chat and get to know you better :)”

Just cause I checked your boxes doesn’t mean you check mine buddy—not a perfect match!

“I love all your curves but my favourite is your smile”

Firstly, the YOU category: “You :) (tongue emoji)”

“You’re the epitome of the word ‘wholesome’”

“You are like a dancing floor”

Because you’re going to walk all over me? I’m multicoloured and chequered? If anyone has an explanation, please get in touch.

Oh, there’s the spice: “Can’t decide which one’s prettier, the girl or the architecture”

How dare you disrespect the Acropolis like that.

“Yeah well can you be seductive whilst eating a hummus coated carrot?”

I don’t understand either.

“You are the most English looking girl I’ve ever seen. Where are you from?”

Since putting on my profile I had to take the ‘Life in the UK’ test to get citizenship, English men have been thoroughly baffled as to how I, a white woman, can be not English (I’m American).

“You must be the golden snitch because you’re the most valuable catch here” (Honourable mention: “Can

“You look absolutely stunning in your profile and you’ve got such beautiful eyes! I’d love the chance to talk more and to get to know you better if that’s okay with you too?”

Sweetie pie. Angel. Darling. Virgin.

“Dunno if you knew this Hannah but your name is the same forwards and backwards”

Brand new information! I’ve been alive

I know with every fibre of my being he sends this to every girl he likes.

“Why do you look like you’re a beautiful elf who lives in the woods?”

Why? Because I am one. Next question.

“What a beautiful photo! Tell me more about it? Who’s the other person? :)”

At least he was clear about his motives (my flatmate in the picture wasn’t seduced by his bold tactics.)

To those of you who want to meet people “organically”, I applaud your commitment and stubbornness, but you’re missing out on some absolute gold.

An Ode to my Mother

Emma Holly

SENIOR OPINION EDITOR

Sometimes, I think that I could go from point to point on the Earth and I would never meet anyone who compares to my mother.

I could swim through Mediterranean seas and walk along the Norwegian fjords, and I would still want to tell my Mum about the fact my feet are aching. She would undoubtedly reply with a swarm of emojis, each one with its own meaning. The owl means she is sending me wisdom. The cat, because she knows I miss my own. The day she discovered Memeojis should have gone down in history – no conversation is now complete without a sticker or two.

late forties; she now follows Monty Don on Instagram. (She’s advancing.)

She also bought me a notebook upon which Paddington Bear was on the front, because she knows that when the going gets tough, I, as a twentyone-year-old woman, resort to the Paddington films. She will put my clothes in the tumble dryer if I accidentally forget and leave them dripping in the washing machine. She will make spaghetti Bolognese on Saturdays, and will sometimes serve it with garlic bread. She remembers that I don’t like liquorice and have a vendetta against caramel. Most of all, she gives wonderful hugs.

Crucially, to reduce my Mum to the title of “mother” is to take away her essence. She has collected a few name tags over the years; daughter, sister, friend. Girlfriend, then fiancé, then wife. Ultimately, mother. She wears them with pride and dusts them regularly.

I have previously expressed to her that, surely, becoming a mother is an act of self-sacrifice. You are waving goodbye to a degree of autonomy, time and money. She has always dismissed this idea with a tilt of the head, and told me that her children are her greatest achievement in her life.

I should also mention that her character looks nothing like her, because she is horrific with technology. My mother finds email attachments baffling, keyboard shortcuts frightening and is allergic to typing quickly. She barely seasons her food beyond a shake of salt, and on a good day, pepper. She considers anything below fifteen degrees Celsius to be Antarctic conditions. She is squeamish and finds my Dad’s sense of humour a little crude. She has bitten her nails to the quick for over five decades. She can eat a 500ml pot of yoghurt in one go, and is entirely responsible for my bread addiction.

Her greatest flaw is that she started watching Gardener’s World in her

My mother doesn’t need to say I love you to say I love you. She says it about fifty times a day in her many ways; I’ve never known love as unwavering as hers. When I have experienced the very worst days of my life, she has always been the first responder at the scene. I have never known her to shy away from her family’s battles. When her own mother passed away, she still made sure that me and my brother still had our packed lunches with which to toddle to school.

I often wonder who she would have become if neither me nor my brother had joined the mix; would she have pursued her career in banking? Would she own a bakery? Perhaps her and Monty Don would be best friends.

I hope she knows she’s my greatest achievement too.

The blogger Tim Urban was reflecting upon his childhood, and how he spent around 90% of his year with his parents before he turned eighteen. Once he left home, he realised he spent a grand total of 3% of his time with them. That statistic petrifies me. I’m in the limbo of flying the nest, whilst my brother has recently moved out. It’s a strange feeling. We’re growing up, and my mother is watching us do it.

The Narration of Sisterhood

Olivia Taylor

SENIOR CULTURE EDITOR

Ihave asked my sister to plait my hair a handful of times in the past, since she has always had this skill that I quite clearly lack. I quickly realised I would rather go without French or Dutch braids, especially if she was going to do them for me. She would pull so hard on my straight, thin strands, tug my head to the point it hurt and even hold pieces of my hair in her mouth so she could use her hands more efficiently. And yet, whilst she clearly was putting in the effort, my plait-

ed hair would never look as good as hers. My sister’s beautiful, bouncy curls will twist together perfectly, always looking thick and healthy and will stay in place forever; her hair is everything mine isn’t. However, she will always complain about how much maintenance is required for her hair, whereas I will never have this issue. Sister jealousy works both ways, but will often take such different forms. We will always have similarities, but it’s what one has that the other does not that will always spark the most intense jealousy, and it usually comes to surface. As author Lisa See quite rightly suggests, ‘A sister is someone who should stand by you and support you and love you no matter what, and yet it’s

also your sister who knows exactly where to drive the knife and hurt you the most.’.

Recently

online there has been a rise of discussion on Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s highly acclaimed television series, Fleabag. The discussion in question has focused on the heart-wrenching beauty of the season two love story between titular characters, Fleabag (WallerBridge) and the Hot Priest (Andrew Scott). It’s true, the portrayal of their relationship truly is excellent, but it could be argued that the relationship between Fleabag and her sister, Claire (Sian Clifford), has the substance that leaves a longer-lasting impression. Waller-

Illustration: Tabitha Turner

Bridge’s depiction of Fleabag and Claire’s relationship illustrates the exact principles of sisterhood, by convincingly presenting the rivalry, jealousy, forgiveness and love that comes with being a sister. In Fleabag, both sisters see the other as having the ideal life; Claire is resentful of Fleabag’s ability to escape accountability whilst Fleabag is envious of Claire’s seemingly put together life. Audiences watch them battle their differences but also find solace and nostalgia in what brings them so close together. Season two follows Claire’s initial alienation of her sister but their relationship heals over time, following miscarriages, big offices and awful haircuts. In the season finale, we watch as Claire tells Fleabag, ‘The only person I’d run through an airport for is you,’ which not only highlights the jump they make from alienation, but equally presents the show as a deviation from most western romances. We are so familiar with romantic endings that we forget about the portrayal of platonic relationships, hence why the ending of Fleabag is so important. She may not get the man but she will always have this beautiful, solidified relationship with her own sister.

Since 1868, Louisa May Alcott’s novel Little Women has taught readers about the complexities of sisterhood. Over the years there have been plenty of film and television adaptations, with the most recent film adaptation being Greta Gerwig’s 2019 take on the classic story. Audiences follow the intertwined lives of the four March sisters, Jo (Saoirse Ronan), Meg (Emma Watson), Beth (Eliza Scanlen) and Amy (Florence Pugh), who all have their contrasting differences but all value the importance of family, particularly their sibling relationships. As with Fleabag, it’s refreshing to see the depiction of pure hatred in relation to sisterhood,

which is something Gerwig does very well. However, the development of Jo and Amy’s relationship proves that no matter the extent of harm and betrayal, each sister will go on to agree that ‘life is too short to be angry at one’s sister,’. This adaptation is actually a favourite of both myself and my own sister, we have watched it together so many times I am certain we could narrate the entire script between us.

Both Fleabag and Little Women follow the stories and lives of sisters who view their counterpart with a mixture of love and envy. The balance of sisterhood is fundamentally a balance of these two themes, so in order to execute the portrayal of this sibling relationship both the highs and the lows must be considered, which is what both Fleabag and Little Women do so well. However, it would be naive to assume every sibling relationship will overcome the hardest betrayals, because some things are not so easily forgivable. However, as a sister myself, I cannot imagine not having that closeness. Being a sister is such a different experience to being a friend or even just a family member, it is a closeness that is defined by a constant incongruity of emotion. A sister knows more about you than anyone else, and this could either work in your favour or against.

A Love Letter to Four Weddings and a Funeral,

A romance film where the romance is incidental. Madelaine Gray

EDITOR IN CHIEF

Iwatched Four Weddings and a Funeral for the first time relatively recently. I was expecting another Notting Hill–and indeed, there are parallels and similarities, in that Richard Curtis directs while Hugh Grant attempts to win the affections of a seemingly-out-of-hisleague American, accompanied by a zany, tight-knit group of friends. Four Weddings, however, is a different film entirely, and quickly became one of my favourites.

Four Weddings stands apart from the usual romcom genre in my mind for many reasons–not least because the romance that the film ostensibly follows is one of the least interesting aspects. It seems almost cliched now to reject Charles and Carrie’s central love story. After all, in the era of “hot takes”, it’s become mainstream to wilfully misunderstand popular media. And Andie McDowell has long been the subject of no small amount of ridicule.

Regardless, I’m going to play along. Because, frankly, Fiona, Gareth, Matthew, Tom, and the rest of the colourful cast of characters offer far more lasting interest than the mystique of the flighty American.

Four Weddings has the feeling of a montage; a collection of moments, more than a necessarily linear plot. It’s a surprisingly unconventional move for a film that does, in other ways, hit many traditional romcom beats. With the exception of a scene in the middle of the film, during which Charles attempts to find

a wedding present for Carrie only to bump into her, the rest of the runtime is split into clearcut events: the titular weddings and funeral. Thus, we never truly see the characters in ordinary circumstances. Anything we learn of their outside lives is essentially incidental, as though the purpose of their presence is to act as part of a dynamic, rather than being fully drawn. And, amongst the core group, that dynamic is wonderful–sarcastic, mocking, snarky, yet so warm and loving, as familiar friendships so often are. The emotional depth of the titular funeral only blossoms due to our implicit understanding of just how close these friends are.

It’s a slightly odd film, undoubtedly, with a quintessentially British sense of humour: dry, self-effacing. It never dwells too long on its own jokes. And it has a pervasive sense of melancholy that you can’t quite escape. Despite most of the runtime taking place at the “happiest days of one’s life”, no one but the first two happy couples seems to enjoy themselves all that much.

No one encapsulates this melancholy quite like Kristin Scott Thomas’ Fiona. Snarky, patrician, icy, glamorous, she’s almost aspirational at the start of the film (if not relatable–she and her brother Tom belong to the seventh-richest family in Britain). Her storyline is poignant–the glamorous, icy best friend, quietly resigned to slowly fall out of unrequited love with the clueless Charles. Or at least slowly let herself get over it.

And said clueless Charles is simply wonderful too, with Hugh Grant firmly establishing his comedic ‘brand’ of floppy-haired, bumbling,

slightly hopeless-in-love characters. Charles serves as the anchorpoint for the film’s humorous approach to romance, and the overall blending of funny and sad. Grant elevates text that is sometimes bland on the page (I’ve read the screenplay), infusing emotional vulnerability that makes Charles’ love-at-first sight for Carrie endearing.

In essence, Four Weddings is wryly funny, melancholy, repressed; and all the more deeply, deeply British for it. Allegedly, no one knew it would be a success. Scott Thomas didn’t think it was funny, and the film was so plagued by budget issues that the extras playing guests were in fact the aristocratic friends of the crew, wearing their own wedding garb.

Well, jokes on them. The film was, at the time of its release, the highest grossing British film ever. W.H Auden’s Funeral Blues sold 257,000 copies. And I’m writing about it almost thirty years later. Its unique tone and stellar performances stand out to me, especially in the sea of early ‘90s rom-coms.

I’ll finish with a thank you to Fiona, for making heartbreak classy. And for your outfit to the third wedding. I have to give some credit to the women of Sex and the City for their first season “Witches of Eastwick” wedding garb, but Fiona will serve as my enduring justification for wearing black on happy occasions.

LIFESTYLE SECOND CHANCES

Beth

McCowen SENIOR LIFESTYLE EDITOR

We have probably all been in a situation at one time or another, when we either gave someone else a second chance, or were hopeful to be given one ourselves. This would most commonly be between a friend, romantic partner or family member, but could really be anyone. For example, work colleagues or sports teammates. Maybe the discussion leading up to the prospect of a second chance was a significant disagreement during which things were said that shouldn’t have been, or perhaps it was something slightly less extreme which you feel ready to move on from. Either way, communication is key, and as Hannah Montana once said: ‘Everybody makes mistakes!’.

That is not to say, though, that you are obligated to give someone a second chance, and vice versa. Sometimes things are just too hard to let go of completely, and that’s okay. You have a duty to safeguard your feelings, as do others theirs. I can’t help but include another Gen-Z oriented quote here: in the wise words of Taylor Swift, ‘You don’t have to forgive, and you don’t have to forget to move on’. Sometimes the damage has been done and there is no going back to what the relationship once was, but you can still reach a point where you are no longer being eaten away at by your frustration at the other person’s actions, or even your own.

Sometimes what makes it so difficult to not only forgive someone, but to give them a new opportunity to start afresh, is nostalgia. If a person has been an important part of your life at all, but especially if this has been for a long period of time or whilst you were growing up, having to look at them in a different light can be disheartening and confusing. Even if you feel hurt by something they have done, as much as you might be angry at them, that doesn’t make it easy to decide what to do next. Do you cut ties completely? Tell them how you feel? Act like everything is fine? There is no one right way to deal with a scenario like this. Everyone deals with unique situations differently, and it is all the more challenging when an issue arises between yourself and somebody you share a history with.

People and our relationships with them do change, and going through university is a prime example of how bonds with friends and family from home can shift. The difficulty comes when we have a hard time accepting this. Nostalgia can be a beautiful thing, but it can also act as an obstacle when we are actively trying to begin a new chapter in our lives. When you know deep down that the best thing for your own wellbeing is to distance yourself from someone, yet you struggle to do so based on a more positive past experience with said person, it can make you feel quite lost. You aren’t alone, though. This is actually a really common experience, not that it makes it any easier.

Trust your instincts. Ultimately, you will probably have a sense

of if someone is good for you or not, but whether you want to listen to it is another story. Caring about a person and remembering the previous good times is great, but acknowledging how you feel currently and how things might turn out in the future is equally as important. Finding the balance between healthy nostalgia and moving forwards can be tough, but it is definitely an important part of growing up and figuring out how to approach certain difficulties.

EARLY 2000S CHILDREN IN CONVERSATION WITH CHILDREN TODAY

Elena Chiujdia

Childhood

in the early 2000s vs late 2000s is like day and night. Children were born with no particular interest in the internet, makeup, revealing clothes or social media. Their ‘free time’ would mean playing outdoors. Today’s generation of early teens choose to be stuck between four walls. Their interests: who has the latest smartphone or biggest following? But let’s be honest, they don’t know any of the people on their Instagram. Kids should take the fake lifestyle created by social media with a pinch of salt!

Phones

A phone for a kid in the early 2000s was a ‘brick phone’. Remember Nokia or those flip phones we had? Usually, it was a hand me down phone from an older sibling. A child would not even need a phone until the age 12. Telling your parents where you were and being back by curfew was enough. Coming back from school was not a luxury car ride. The bus, bike or walking back was the norm. Once parents saw a phone as necessary, it was just that: for necessities. Calling or messaging in an emergency. The signal was not the best and if phones did have internet, children would most likely not know how to use it. Today, a 3-year-old knowing how to use a smartphone is part of the ordinary.

It is both disappointing and hilarious hearing children describe Nokia as ancient devices. Not having a touch screen? Not having unlimited access to social media? Their reality without a phone as an extension to their

hand is unimaginable. Some children are genuinely spoiled. But society is becoming more dangerous for the typical naïve child. Twenty years ago, parents didn’t have to worry so much about abuse, gangs, smoking or drinking. So, a smartphone becomes a lifeline, a security device between child and parent. But the downsides remain. Children don’t want to go outside anymore. Boys would choose their play station or Xbox any day. Girls then become TikTok experts, seeing social media as their ideal ‘time off’.

Movies and music

There are two sides to generation Z children: 1995 to 2006 babies and the ones born after. 2002 teenagers are nostalgic about Mean Girls, Princess Diaries, Friends. Listening to NSYNC, Destiny’s Child, Rihanna. The 2000s Disney Channel was our main form of entertainment: Zac and Cody, Wizards of Waverly Place, Good Luck Charlie. What they are doing today seems to be simply recreating bad versions of our childhood classics. Times have changed; to watch movies, Netflix did not exist. DVDs and CDs were the go-to. Today is a whole different story. When you use words like CDs or DVD players, children have no idea what you’re talking about. They have the luxury of listening to music at the press of a button on Spotify. Their short attention span asks for content that’s fast, with no ad interruptions.

To watch a movie in the early 2000s meant finding the television schedule, it meant recording a movie to watch it later. Now, there is no need for that.

The majority of children appear to have access to Disney Plus, Netflix or Amazon Prime. Despite being more easily accessible, such streaming services led to a dependency on the online and binge-watching shows. The mind of an early teen becomes hyp-

notised almost robotically attached to screens.

Friendships

Having good friends since childhood is the best part of growing up. Now we stand and reminisce about what we had, and what unfortunately they never will: Nintendo 2DS, Mario Kart, Playdough, Heelys. Instead, a child today spends their time playing video games or watching YouTubers vlog their life. They are not living their own lives but taking a spectator seat, watching someone else’s. So, kids are stigmatised as anti-social, secluded, products of the internet phenomenon. Primary school used to be the place you made friends, yet the smartphone culture has placed a barrier between kids’ lives and reality. It is through the screen of a phone they communicate with others. Face to face conversations were replaced by texting.

To become good friends, sleepovers were a must. Watching chick flicks, doing karaoke, and making loom band friendship bracelets after building a pillow fort. For 12-year-olds today, their concept of a sleepover consists of TikTok dances, ordering pizza, sending each other reels whilst in the same room and gossiping about boys. Those are surface level, superficial friendships. Being able to say you have been best friends with someone for more than 10 years is something you should take pride in, in this day and age.

Childhood has indeed changed. It is not a time of innocence and silliness anymore. Children used to learn how to swim or ride a bike when they were little. The most dramatic event used to be realising Santa Claus is not real. Today, all children need is a smartphone, and having no WiFi is a life-ruining crisis. We knew how to be happy, but perhaps they don’t.

SPORT

Nostalgia, Sport, and Parental Love–

The raw emotion of nostalgia.

Peter Vigh

SENIOR SPORTS EDITOR

Nostalgia is such a personal overwhelming experience. A yearning to experience what is no longer obtainable. For many, sports evoke a strong sense of nostalgia. Whether that be for the better or for the worse. However, it remains to be said that sport has its own unique way of conjuring up memories and emotions that just can’t stop you from smiling. Why is that?

Usually, it’s a sense of carefree fun or high moments of success and happiness. Perhaps more unusually, it’s the embodying of emotions, which a lot of the time we do not feel anymore or don’t get to enjoy. That’s why that feeling of nostalgia hits so hard. A time when things just felt right in life. Pure. And, if you dig a little deeper into

that emotion, you realise that the background feeling of parental love shines through. Think back to a nostalgic sporting memory. Whether that be an individual sporting event or team sport. Look past the comradery between mates and personal high. You’ll remember a time when you felt most loved and supported. A window in time that laid down a key memory and connection between you and your guardian. That there is special. It evokes such nostalgia because of how raw and deep the emotions flow. A pillar memory that has shaped you.

Shaping, supporting, loving. That is what parents strive to do. Even if we don’t always see it. Love is not bound to dimensions, as it is powerful beyond physical barriers. It is why parental love is so untouchable in sport.

1992, 400m semi-final. Man on a mission, Derek Redmond, is about to start his last hurdle before having a chance for Olympic glory. He wants it badly. Missing out on the previous Olympics left a sour taste in the mouth but with an extra four years of hard work, he was bound to show the world what he can do.

Bang!

The gun fires, full steam ahead. Got to make it to the front to be in contention for the final.

Camera is zooming along with the runners when one seems to have gone missing. Is that….is that Derek?

Fallen to the ground, anguishing in pain. You could see him fighting his

demons, building the will to finish what he had started.

Like a fighting flea, he bounces up and continues. Not allowing his dream to end like this. A dream which someone else shares and has nurtured to become a reality. This person being his father. Jim Redmond.

He knew what to do, without question. He barged through the barriers, through the security. His love showing no bounds, the torch that is love coming to bring light to the end of the tunnel. He embraces his son, the warmest of touches being enough to comfort his son to the submission of his emotions.

No sporting sight is more touching than that of father and son finishing the Olympics together.

That right there is parental love and the power it holds to bring a person to their rawest of emotions. Nostalgia is the gateway to that emotion. Parental love is special and unconditional. It is why the strongest nostalgia holds the deepest of love.

Just a Thought

by Joe King

Retrospect is the transparent Mirror that binds all, Grasping onto a childhood which conceptually Never existed.

You are simply the person you see one step ahead. Our only true shared purpose is To cease to exist, to be Recycled and eventually rewritten In the crusade of matter as we know it.

Before you get overwhelmed, Take a breath.

Leaves that whisper eloquently conversing with the wind, Stars that chime in the stillness, Supporting the soloist we know As the moon.

Orchestras of fungi singing in unison, Birthing colours of red, orange and green. But Yet, on this quiet night, everything is One shade of blue.

Do not grieve your penultimate unbecoming. Even a butterfly can cause a hurricane, And eventually, You will too.

A Moment

by Nelson Kalberer

Waves on the shore

Frothing on the cool sand

Moving farther and farther inland Stopping for a moment.

Sun on the horizon

Orange ball of brilliant bursting light Shines forth its rays whilst lowering beneath the waves Stopping for a moment.

Bird in the sky

Soaring through the air Barely moving its wings except to flap once Stopping for a moment.

Grass blade from the ground

Standing at attention on the cliffside Bending ever so graciously from Aeolus’ breath Stopping for a moment.

Seal below the water

Keeping itself warm with fur Twisting and turning into figure eights Stopping for a moment.

I, on the cliff’s edge

Grass moving in the breeze between my fingertips Watching orange light flash of churning waters Stopping for a moment.

I turn away

Waves retreat back from the sand

Sun slides under the horizon The bird flaps its wings while the seal untangles from itself-

The grass is still as stone as a moment ends

Transferware

by Ellie Pritchard

“Thomas? Thomas come here!” Amanda called from the kitchen, sounding alarmed. He hastily squeezed himself down the hallway between the stacks of boxes. In the kitchen, Amanda was kneeling beside an opened box.

“Look, it all got crushed.”

“What? How?” He knelt beside her, and they began carefully removing the shattered crockery from the box, keeping as much of it as they could within the little newspapered bundles.

“I don’t know, we packed all the boxes in so neatly and neither of us heard anything as we drove. I really don’t know what happened.”

“Perhaps it was at the bottom and we stacked too much on top? Is it the only one that got crushed?”

“It’s the only one I’ve opened. I knew it had the crockery in, I was going to make us a quick brew before bed. I haven’t checked any others.” Amanda’s eyes welled as she moved to check the other boxes, so meticulously marked as ‘fragile’, as Thomas sorted through the first box to see if anything was still whole. Very little was. All their white mugs were smashed to pieces, as were the highball tumblers, and one of the martini glasses his mum has gifted them on their tenth anniversary not long before. There was one set of crockery in particular that he was hoping wasn’t in this box-

This set had been purchased soon after the last hospital appointment. It had been unsurprising when the doctor had told them that they would never conceive naturally. They’d been trying for so long, with tips and medications recommended by various people. Even before that final appointment, there’d been plenty of late-night crying sessions, Amanda’s tear-stained face pressed into his aching chest. It had been even worse afterwards. The finality of the doctor’s tone, the sympathetic way he’d offered to explain IVF possibilities, and the crack in Thomas’ voice when he’d replied thanks, but they already knew they could never afford it. They’d got home and Amanda had barely said a word for days. He’d cooked every meal, and she’d been grateful but pushed it aside after scarcely a few mouthfuls. After about a week, however, he’d come downstairs to find her humming softly while she made coffee. She’d said that she’d simply had enough of being sad.

Thomas had known that neither of them would get over it any time soon – even now, a year later, he still felt a pang whenever someone asked when they were starting a family. Ready to begin the process of moving on though, the next day he had driven her to the next town, to the antique shop she’d wanted to visit for ages. It was a curious place, dark wood walls rising from an almost-neon yellow carpet, and bursting with a chaotic assortment of furniture, ornaments, everything. The bright-eyed owner, with silver-white hair and the reddest lipstick they’d ever seen on a woman her age – they’d laughed about it on the way home – had let them walk around undisturbed for hours, opening all the cupboards and drawers, giggling at their warped reflections in the old mirrors, and making up silly voices for all the creepy dolls scattered around. Eventually, after a particularly insulting comment about a brown-haired doll, the owner had approached and rather bluntly asked them if they were planning on buying anything or if they were simply there to ‘mess around like children’. Amanda had grabbed the nearest item and announced that it was exactly what they were looking for – a white and blue china teacup. The old lady had turned up her nose, picked up the whole tea-set, and carried it ceremoniously over to the till to wrap up. Nothing could completely fix the grief they both felt for the children they’d never have, but that trip had certainly helped in the immediate aftermath.

“The others are fine! Except this one, but only the top plate is smashed.” Amanda beamed at him. That was something, at least.

“Not too much to replace then,” Thomas chuckled despite himself, as he pulled out the final few lumps of newspapered china and gingerly unwrapped them. “But we’ve lost two of those blue and white teacups.”

Amanda launched herself over immediately, tenderly unfolding the newspaper from around the broken shards of blue china like she was unwrapping a swaddled infant. “Two broke? We’ve only got two left?”

“Only two left.” He held them up to show her, rather sadly. “But at least that’s one each.”

“One each. That’ll do, I suppose.”

Thomas stood, setting the teacups down on the kitchen side and flicking on the kettle she’d unpacked before discovering the crockery disaster. Pulling Amanda to her feet and slipping his arms around her, Thomas smiled, and said, “That’ll do.”

Dear Grandma

by Emma Holly

Yesterday, my brother proposed to his girlfriend and this evening, he sent me a photo of our childhood cat.

Today, I cried twice at a whale and thrice just because; tomorrow, I’ll get up early and become more than that.

Tonight, just tonight, I think about the image that once was.

We’re five and eight, and school is in ten. He’s piloting fifty soft toys and I just oneMum calls and please, we’re not done yet; they’ll be in the same place later.

The day they got vacuum-packed, I forget.

Someday, she’ll walk the aisle in all white and I’ll weep for every forward march

my brother once cried himself purple when alone but now he waits solitary under the arch.

Tonight, just tonight, I’ll feel this ache in each bone.

He shuts himself in his room, bang, and his only company is angst and hunger strikes.

A week before, I asked mum is he gay? She said he’s just taking his time and the likes.

I didn’t know him then, much to my dismay.

Tonight, I will politely ask time to pause, just long enough for me to grasp the railing.

I’ll wonder what the next place will be because I didn’t catch the route, my failing.

I miss my stop, whilst craning my neck to see.

Yesterday, my brother proposed to his girlfriend and this evening, I forgot I was thirteen years past eight.

Today, I missed you and wanted to tell you all. Tomorrow, I’ll be daughter sister girlfriend mate.

I’m tasting sun-dried tomatoes for the last first time.

To a Friend, in the Unlikely Event of our Separation.

by Ellie Pritchard

“If you want me again, look for me under your boot-soles.” – Walt Whitman

Look for me in the red wine stain on the Turkish carpet, Look for me in the grains of salt that covered it. Look for me in the starlit sky, the constellations you taught me, Look for me in the photo albums, our faces gleaming endlessly.

Look for me in the beckoning sky, the sun, the moon, the stars, Look for me in the light reflecting them, the windows of shining cars.

Look for me in the theatre programme, even though I am not there. Look for me in the lights onstage – no, pay attention.

Look for me in your tears when you’re watching Nora Ephron films, Look for me when you need teasing about your lanky gazelle limbs. Look for me in the purrs of cats we encountered on the street, Look for me in the hearts of our friends, the people we loved to meet. Look for me in the faces of men approaching you in bars, Look for me in the laughter that follows, and tell them to not be an arse.

Look for me in your laughter, look for me in your tears. Look for me when someone says they love you – I love you.

Look for me in the golden feathers of the parrots we used to draw, Look for me in the black-stemmed notes of the Elgar violin score. Look for me in the bluebells carpeting the woods we cycled through, Look for me in the pages of books I recommended to you.

Look for me in the memories you have, the ones we share together, Look for me whenever you need me – I’ll stay with you forever.

Dear Davidson,

Dear Davidson,

I’m a first year, and when I started university my boyfriend and I agreed that we would try long distance and then discuss at Christmas whether or not we could continue. He messaged me last week and told me that he wants to stay in a relationship with me, but wants to have sex with other people while we’re apart. I’m heartbroken, and I’m really uncomfortable with this proposition, but I love him and don’t want to break up. What should I do?

I would like to start by saying that I’m sorry. This truly is a terrible situation to be in, to be faced with a boy you love telling you he would like to - how do I put this nicely - have his cake and eat it. Whilst I am aware this situation may work for some people, where both parties consent, clearly this isn’t the route you expected your relationship to go and that is completely understandable.

I will make the general assumption that when you and your boyfriend first started dating, you both agreed to remain committed to one another, and as a part of that, agreed not have sex with other people. Clearly, your boyfriend needs to be reminded of this commitment. If he wants to ‘stay in a relationship’ then he must remember what you both initially wanted. The first step to solving this problem is to address it and to initiate conversation. This will be hard, you will have to take an outside perspective on your relationship to be able to listen and understand why he wants this in the first place. Hearing out loud the reasons why your boyfriend wants to sleep with other people will definitely not be easy but, if you do really love him and want to solve this, you must find the source of the issue. If the problem is the distance between you two I am surprised he hasn’t at least given it to Christmas like you had previously discussed. I know people have their needs but … come on. I don’t know the exact distance between you or either of your financial situations, but if it is possible to do so, I would suggest you take turns to visit each other throughout the terms. This isn’t just something you should be doing, especially if he wants to remain in a relationship. And these visits to one another shouldn’t just be about having sex. It should be more about spending time with each other, reminding you both why you are in a relationship in the first place. Communication is so important in a long distance relationship and you will have to think of new, creative ways to remain connected. I was recently talking to a friend about long distance and she mentioned the importance of having a goal to work towards. Since you are in first year, future relationship goals are so far limited, but perhaps you should suggest goals for your summer break, something you can both look forward to. This is only if he is willing to remain committed to just you; if you both want different things perhaps it would be best to move on, for both of your sakes.

Don’t sacrifice your happiness or allow yourself to feel uncomfortable just because you love him. This is your relationship too. Whilst I really hope you will be able to communicate your worries and find ways to keep both your needs satisfied, just remember that there are other people out there who will prioritise your comfort and wishes.

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TheCrossword

The Name Game (when in doubt, try the surname)

The Name Game

ACROSS:

Across

7. English Romantic painter, known for many paintings of the sea (6)

7. English Romantic painter, known for many paintings of the sea (6)

8. Female prosecutor in the OJ Simpson murder trial (5)

8. Female prosecutor in the OJ Simpson murder trial (5)

9. Award-winning American author of just three novels, including “The Little Friend” (5)

11. Bear stalking campus (8)

9. Award-winning American author of just three novels, including "The Little Friend" (5)

DOWN:

Down

1. Marks and Spencer's loyalty card (6)

1. Marks and Spencer’s loyalty card (6)

2. Female side of the Oedipal coin (7)

2. Female side of the Oedipal coin (7)

3. British artist and textile designer, sharing a given name with 7 across (6)

3. British artist and textile designer, sharing a given name with (TURNER) (6)

11. Bear stalking campus (8)

13. 2016 American Democratic presidential candidate, who previously served in the Senate as an Independent (7)

15. Obsessive housekeeper in Daphne Du Maurier’s Rebecca (7)

13. 2016 American Democratic presidential candidate, who previously served in the Senate as an Independent (7)

15. Obsessive housekeeper in Du Maurier's Rebecca (7)

17. Most recent abdicated British monarch (6) 18. Author of many essays and novels, including “The White Album” (6)

17. Most recent abdicated British monarch (6)

18. Author of many essays and novels, including "The White Album" (6)

4. American outdoor clothing company, which was recently given away to charity by the founder (9)

4. American outdoor clothing company, which was recently given away to charity by the founder (9) 5. Shortest serving UK Prime Minister (5) 6. Swedish backpack brand, colloquially (6)

5. Shortest serving UK Prime Minister (5)

10. Female, British member of Fleetwood Mac, recently deceased (5)

6. Swedish backpack brand, colloquially (6)

12. Holloway’s historic London campus (7)

10. Female, British member of Fleetwood Mac, recently deceased (5)

14. American newspaper with most Pulitzer prizes (shortened) (3)

16. JFK’s (alleged) assassin (6)

12. Holloway's historic London campus (7)

14. American newspaper with most Pulitzer prizes (shortened) (3)

17. Screenplay writer behind the “Meg Ryan Trilogy” (6)

16. JFK's (alleged) assassin (6)

17. Screenplay writer behind the "Meg Ryan Trilogy" (6)