OU Israel Center Torah Tidbits - Parshat Vayeishev 5785
Special Chanukah Section with Laws and Blessings Pg 58-63
Chanukah and the War for Holiness and Redemption
Jen Airley Page 38
Simchat Shmuel
Rabbi Sam Shor Page 44
Aliya-by-Aliya Sedra
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“ We’ll Skip This Next Story”
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“In”
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The Price of a Pair of Shoes
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The Jewish Instinct
Rabbi Aaron Goldscheider
Chanukah Candles Inside and Outside?
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Good Advice
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Prophecy and Personality
Mrs. Leah Feinberg
The Art of Crafting Compelling Dating Profiles
Shagririm Balev
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The Power of the Chanukah Lights
Shoshana Judelman
The Israel You Won’t
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Sivan Rahav Meir
The Y-Files Comic Netanel Epstein
NCSY: Torah 4 Teens by Teens
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IMPORTANT REMINDERS
The first light of Chanukah will be lit Wednesday, December 25th at sundown.
Rabbi Moshe Taragin COVER IMAGE Photographed by Elisheva Elbaz I live in Maaleh Adumim. This is a picture I took last winter overlooking our wadi. Very often bedoins shepherd their sheep in this wadi. I love watching them graze right outside our living room window. I’m sure our Avot brought their sheep to areas just like this. I made aliyah all by myself from Los Angeles in 2005, at the age of 19.
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OTHER Z'MANIM
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RABBI AVI BERMAN EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, OU ISRAEL ABERMAN@OUISRAEL.ORG
Rabbi Avi Berman Executive
Director,
OU Israel
In this week’s parsha, we learn about the differences between Yosef and his brothers, and about the dynamics of different members of Yaakov Avinu’s family. Anyone blessed with children, siblings, grandchildren, nieces and nephews, or neighbors - basically all of us - can relate to these family dynamics in some way within our own relationships. As a bechor (oldest) son with five amazing siblings, I can understand at least a little bit as to how much responsibility a bechor like Reuven must have felt to try to keep the peace while attempting to save Yosef from the other brothers. Seeing that so many of us can find connections to our own family dynamics in this parsha, I find it can be very valuable to examine it through that lens.
Throughout my life, I have worked with teens, from NCSY in Vancouver, Canada, our OU Israel Teen Centers and Bnei Akiva here in Israel. I am very aware of the many challenges facing our teens. These are young
May the Torah learned from this issue of Torah Tidbits be in loving memory of and תמשנ
our beloved husband, father, grandfather and great-grandfather
Dr. Simcha (Sanford) Rudman ל”ז
on his 1st Yahrzeit
Rudman, Rothkoff, Nizri, Har Kochav and Finaret families
men and women who see the world a certain way. Often they have certain attitudes which can be very difficult for parents to deal with. Many parents wonder what is the best way to respond. How can the family dynamic, with sibling rivalries, responsibilities, and relationships, be made healthy and successful?
To be honest, I don’t know if there is a book or class that knows the answer for every situation as they are immensely complex. That being said, teenagers are, generally speaking, looking for those who can give them a sense of guidance in their lives. In addition to parents, they often look towards a parental figure including an older sibling, an older and wiser friend, a teacher, or a youth group advisor.
We see this day in and day out. NCSY has been working with Jewish teens in North America for decades, and in Israel our Teen Centers have been operating for 25 years. In our Teen Centers, we work with teenagers from all over the religious spectrum in Israel and mesorati teens. Adding to the regular teenage challenges, think about what they have gone through for the last year plus, with parents who are stressed, who have left for war and whose fate is uncertain; siblings who have been drafted or have been injured or even killed in war, or knowing people who were kidnapped. Sometimes, it is just the stress of dealing with the missiles flying at their homes and sirens at 2:00 am. Many of us have been through these experiences as well, but it hits our teens very hard.
OU Israel has over 250 staff members who
work with youth across the country. What they hear from these teens, what these teens have been through, is incredibly difficult. Teens who see their parents sometimes falling apart, parents fighting with them and with each other, parents dedicating themselves to needs outside the home at the expense of their children – we are hearing all sorts of stories. Our staff is working around the clock to help these teens and trying to bridge the gaps and provide the unconditional love and guidance they might feel is missing in their homes. We are working with their parents and with them to get their homes back to feeling safe and getting them back to success at school as well. It’s a full-time job for many of our staff, who also have their own lives and their own families to be with as well at the end of the day, but they do it with a tremendous amount of passion and love.
I remember sitting in class when I was in elementary school, and our teacher asked us the following question: “You see a house in which a fire is growing bigger. You have access to a water faucet, a hose, and a bucket. What do you do?” I remember the whole class raised their hands and had the same response. “You’d take the water in the bucket and put out the fire.” The teacher smiled and said, “I’m sorry, but you’re all wrong.” He explained that the first step is always to call the fire department. Only then do you see how you can help yourself.
I think of this example often. Many times in our lives, we think we can put out the fire ourselves. “I can deal with this challenge alone.” Yet, often we need to be willing to
see that we need help.
When OU Israel began teen programming, we had a small staff. As our awareness of the problems facing our teens grew, our staff grew. Today, even 250 staff members are not enough. That is why we started a program called Meshivat Nefesh eight years ago. Meshivat Nefesh is a course that provides young women (we are exploring starting a parallel program for young men as well) the training necessary to be advisors for teens in Israel. It is a program that has been growing every single year, to almost sixty young women, all of them interested in acquiring
The OU Israel family sends heartfelt condolences to Rabbi Reuven Tradburks and family on the passing of his MOTHER a”h
these important tools for dealing with teens at risk. The goal is for them to use these tools to help themselves and their families, but also their neighbors and friends as well.
This past week, I had the zechut to speak to them, and it was incredible to see the passion in their eyes to help as many people as possible. They are paying for this course, and they are fully invested in it, with one goal: to lift up so many spirits out there who need it.
In my heart, I daven to HaKadosh Baruch Hu, please let what these young women are doing be some small tikkun for selling our brother Yosef thousands of years ago. Just like You see how many soldiers fight for people they never met before, just like You see how many people in Israel are doing chesed by feeding families they don’t know, visiting hospital patients they don’t know and so much more, so too You see this group of amazing women who want to help in every way they can. They have taken it upon themselves to come to Yerushalayim, to our new OU Israel headquarters, and are training themselves to become leaders in order to help others. Please, Hashem, let this be the spark that brings the geulah and bring Mashiach speedily in our days.
Wishing you all an uplifting and inspiring Shabbat,
Rabbi Avi Berman
May the Torah learning from this issue be in loving memory of and תמשנ יוליעל my father
Irving (Irv) Herman z”l
on his yahrzeit
Darlene Herman
FROM THE DESK OF RABBI MOSHE HAUER
OU EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT
Brothers
What principles do you stand for?
Just last week we read the Torah’s account of Shimon and Levi’s principled stand on behalf of their sister Dina in Shechem as they could not tolerate standing by as she was violated. Yet, remarkably, this week we read about the same Shimon and Levi in the very same place doing the precise opposite, scheming to eliminate their own brother Yosef. Their attitudinal transition is described between the lines of the lead-up
HE FULFILLED HIS CALLING
PROF. DR. RABBI NORMAN (TULLY)
TOKAYER
We mourn his loss on his first yahrzeit and everyday
He changed the lives of all he touched - his family, his colleagues, his many admiring students. His intellect, modesty, and philosophy of life and faith was an inspiration to all.
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to their fateful meeting (Bereishit 33:16-17):
“I am looking for my brothers. Can you tell me where they are pasturing the sheep?” “They have moved on from this.”
As our Sages read these words, they saw Yosef seeking to connect to the brothers whom he may have earlier estranged by the gossipy tales he had shared about them with their father. But the brothers – specifically Shimon and Levi – were moving in the opposite direction. They had already consciously chosen alienation as they had moved on from “this,” from any feeling of brotherhood with Yosef(see Rashi). Indeed, as Yosef approaches them and they plan his abduction, nowhere in their discussion do they refer to him as their brother (37:19-22). It is only later in the story when Yehuda speaks up with responsibility that brotherhood is brought back into the story (37:26-27).
This troubling attitudinal shift in Shimon and Levi is apparently not simply an expression of personal grievance and resentment to Yosef. This is evidenced by the reappearance of this attitude generations later in two dramatic actions perpetrated by Shimon and Levi’s descendants, Zimri and Korach. Each of them publicly attacked Moshe, fomenting division within the Jewish people. Furthermore, Shechem, the location of the original pair of transitional stories, would be the place where the ten tribes rejected King Rechavam’s leadership, dividing the Jewish family and kingdom for generations (Sanhedrin 102a).
and our next step will be to plant a fruit tree. I never thought of myself as being the agricultural type, but the feeling of settling and planting a portion of Eretz Yisrael, has been truly euphoric. Iy”H, when we plant our tree, and eat the fruits that will grow one day, I think we will be able to truly appreciate that unique Kedusha found in the fruit of Eretz Yisrael!
To conclude, when you buy your Tu B'shvat fruit this year, don’t search for those dried apricots and banana chips imported from Turkey. Rather, head over to the fresh produce and buy yourself some nice juicy Kedusha-filled Jaffa oranges and thank Hashem for bringing you to this land in order to be able to הבוטמ
, imbibing that Kedusha in every bite that you take!!
This pattern can help us locate the actual source of Shimon and Levi’s shift. The original Shechem story closes with Shimon and Levi piously dismissing Yaakov’s rebuke (34:31). Once their father was cast aside, the unifying structure of the Jewish family was broken. This was what allowed them to choose alienation from their brother. Their attitude did not derive from a lack of brotherly passion but from a lack of commitment to the familial and communal unity of Klal Yisrael. That unity was represented in the days of Shimon and Levi by the father figure of Yaakov, in the days of Zimri and Korach by the Torah leadership of Moshe Rabbeinu, and in the days of the tribes by the throne of the Davidic Kingdom. Shimon and Levi’s irreverent rejection of the father would lead to Zimri and Korach’s similar dismissal of Moshe, and finally to Yeravam’s undermining of Rechavam.
There are many sacred principles for which we must stand, but if we as a people are ever to heal from the vain hatred, the sinat chinam, that has divided and harmed us since the days that Yosef was sold by his brothers, we need to stand up for the familial and communal unity of Klal Yisrael.
May the Torah learning in this week’s issue of Torah Tidbits be
our beloved
Sharon Tamar Horowitz a”h on her 51st Yahrtzeit -
the first night of Chanukah
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The
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Aliya-by-Aliya Sedra Summary
RABBI REUVEN TRADBURKS
RCA Israel Region ALIYA-BY-ALIYA
Rabbi Reuven Tradburks
RCA ISRAEL REGION
PARSHAT VAYEISHEV
The sale of Yosef in Parshat Vayeishev is one of the most famous stories of the Torah.
Yaakov settles, finally, in the Land of Israel. Yosef is favored. Yosef has 2 dreams. Yaakov sends Yosef to inquire of his brother’s welfare. The brothers sell Yosef to merchants traveling to Egypt. Yehuda is confronted by Tamar and accepts responsibility. Yosef achieves great success as a servant to Potiphar. After being framed by Potiphar’s wife, Yosef ends up in jail. His success continues in jail. He interprets the dreams of the butler and baker but remains in jail.
The story of Yosef is the longest in the Torah, spanning 4 parshiot. Its panoply of human emotions and struggles is gripping: a favored child, dreams, jealousy, isolation, sexual struggle, success. And later; tears, confrontation and brotherly responsibility. It is the story that lays bare human foibles and eventually human triumph; hence its appeal and fame.
1ST ALIYA (37:1-12)
Yaakov settles in the Land of Israel. Yosef is 17, brings negative reports of his brothers to his father. Yaakov loves Yosef. He gives him a special coat, provoking the jealousy of his brothers. Yosef has 2 dreams. The brothers are gathering sheaves of wheat; their sheaves gather around and bow to Yosef’s. The sun, moon and 11 stars bow to him. The brothers feel hatred. Yaakov, while
criticizing Yosef, takes note of the dreams. The first verse, while eminently simple, introduces this entire story. “Yaakov settled in the Land of his father’s sojourning.” As if to say: they were sojourners, but not me. I am going to settle here, in my own Land. Avraham was promised the Land of Israel. And that his children would be strangers in a strange land, returning wealthy to Israel. Yaakov figures, “hey, that was me. I was the stranger in a strange land. Long years with Lavan. Returned wealthy. Now on to the next stage of Jewish history: settling and ruling this Land”.
The time to settle and eventually rule this Land has arrived. Building a state requires an economic change, from shepherding to farming. A state cannot be built by shepherds: agriculture roots one in the land and can sustain a nation. And rule requires power.
When Yosef dreams not of sheep but of bundles of wheat, Yaakov’s ears perk up. Why a dream of wheat when we are shepherds? Is this a new world dawning?
And then a dream of power, of the sun, moon and stars. Is this a Divine message, through dreams, that the promise of the Land is about to happen, with agriculture and power facilitating the building of our nation? Yaakov takes note of these dreams. 2ND ALIYA (37:13-22)
Yaakov sends Yosef to inquire of the welfare of his brothers. A man directs him to Dotan. The brothers plot to kill
Yosef and put an end to his dreams. Reuven objects to spilling his blood, suggesting to merely throw him into a pit. He saves Yosef, hoping to return him to his father.
The single best known aliya in the Torah (ok, because of Broadway – such is our world). Brothers wanting to kill their brother? This is unprecedented. Well, except for the first brothers in the Torah, Cain and Abel. Rivalry, competition, jealousy is an inescapable part of life. Brothers struggle (as the Midrash says re Cain and Abel) over inheritance money, religion, marriage or here, parental love and jealousy. Had the Torah avoided this sibling rivalry, it would have lacked the reality of life. But what is of much greater import is the response to rivalry. The response of sibling loyalty, brotherhood and responsibility (and lack of it) is the story of the Torah. Now, it does take quite a while until that loyalty prevails, but so be it. Human failures will happen – how to respond is the concern of our Torah.
3RD ALIYA (37:23-36)
Yosef is stripped of his coat, thrown in an empty cistern. Merchants appear. Yehuda objects to killing their brother, convincing the others to sell Yosef to these merchants. Yosef is sold to the merchants and brought to Egypt. Reuven finds the cistern empty and rends his garments. Yosef’s coat is dipped in blood, brought to Yaakov. Yaakov rips his clothes and is inconsolable. Yosef ends up in the home of Potiphar.
Yosef dreamed of the sun, moon and stars – as high as you can get – and ended up in the pit, as low as you can get. Yaakov, who dreamt of a ladder ascending to the heavens, now says he will “sink to the netherworld in mourning”. Yaakov deceived Yitzchak with goatskin on his arms; Yaakov was deceived
by Yosef’s coat dipped in goat’s blood.
4TH ALIYA (38:1-30)
Yehuda descends. He has 3 sons. One son marries Tamar and dies, as does the second. He delays the 3rd son from marrying her. Tamar disguises herself. She becomes pregnant from Yehuda. Yehuda orders her to be put to death. She sends his identifying possessions. Yehuda admits. She has twins, Peretz and Zerach.
Yehuda descends. But ends up with Zerach – shine. Yehuda withheld his 3rd son from Tamar, as he withheld Yosef from returning to Yaakov by selling Yosef. But here he took full responsibility whereas there he didn’t. When the brothers wanted to kill Yosef, Reuven told them to throw him in a pit. Ok, don’t kill him with a knife; kill him passively, of starvation. Yehuda stood up; let’s not kill him, let’s sell him. That certainly was better than killing him. But he really should have objected more vociferously and said: “I will not let you harm Yosef. I will return him to Abba.” Here he takes full responsibility. This is a harbinger of the full acceptance of responsibility he will demonstrate later in guaranteeing Binyamin’s return to Yaakov.
5TH ALIYA (39:1-6)
Yosef descends to Egypt. G-d is with Yosef and he is successful. Yosef’s owner sees that G-d is with him and that all he does G-d makes successful. G-d blesses the master’s home because of Yosef; all that is his in his home and field, G-d blesses. He gives Yosef total control of all that is his.
A little wee aliya of 6 verses. And G-d’s name appears 6 times. G-d’s name did not appear in the 66 verses until here in the parsha (save for the death of the 2 sons of
Yehuda: “they did bad in the eyes of G-d”). This is very similar to the absence of G-d in the beginning of Sefer Shemot until He finally sees their affliction.
Man does just fine spiraling down all by himself – Yosef at the hands of his brothers, Yehuda with his mishandling of Tamar, the Jews in Egypt at the hands of Paro. When he hits bottom, G-d appears.
6TH ALIYA (39:7-23)
Potiphar’s wife propositions Yosef. Yosef resists, for as much as he has complete authority in the home, this would be a sin to G-d. With no one around, she grabs him. He flees, leaving her holding his garment. She frames Yosef as having approached her. Yosef is thrown in jail. G-d is kind to him and the jail keeper puts Yosef in charge. All that he does, G-d makes successful.
Note the parallels: The brothers take Yosef’s coat from him; Mrs. Potiphar is holding Yosef’s garment. The brothers deceive their father with the coat; Mrs. Potiphar deceives her husband with the coat. Yosef is sold as a slave; Yosef ends up in jail.
From dreaming of the sun, moon and stars, and brothers bowing to him, Yosef has gone down to Egypt, down in status to a slave, and now down yet again to jail.
Yosef earns the title of Yosef HaTzaddik from his resistance to Mrs. Potiphar. He is alone, in
In Loving Memory of Louis Denkberg
Husband, father, grandfather and great-grandfather on his 7th yahrzeit
He is greatly missed -
The Denkberg and Bar-Lev families
a foreign land, no one around, being propositioned; yet, his thoughts are sinning to G-d.
7TH ALIYA
(40:1-23)
The butler and baker of Paro are jailed. Yosef takes care of them. They dream. Yosef asks: tell me the dreams for their explanations are to G-d. The butler saw a fruitful vine, squeezing the grapes into the cup of Paro. Yosef says: you will be restored as butler. And, Yosef adds, remember me when things are good again and tell Paro, for I don’t deserve to be here. The baker describes dreaming of bread on his head. Yosef says: you will be hanged. The butler is restored. The baker is hung. The butler forgets Yosef.
While the Yosef story moves quickly for us the reader, years have passed. 2 years will pass from the butler being restored until Yosef interprets Paro’s dream next week. He was 17 when the brothers sold him. Now he is 28. He will be 30 when he interprets Paro’s dreams. And if Yosef is such a good interpreter of dreams – well, he himself had 2 dreams. What does he make of his dreams? He dreamt of the brother’s bundles of wheat bowing to him. And of power, all bowing to him. Does he mull over his dreams every once in a while? Every week? Every day? He tells Paro that having 2 dreams implies that they will happen soon. He had 2 dreams. His dreams didn’t happen soon. Does he think they will still happen? After all, how soon is soon? A few days? Or 25 years?
HAFTORAH - AMOS 2:6 -3:8
This week's haftorah contains an allusion to the sale of Yosef by his brothers, which was discussed in this week's Torah reading. Amos opens with a rebuke to the Jewish
People. Hashem had been patient with them notwithstanding their transgression of the three cardinal sins — sexual impropriety, idolatry and murder. Their fourth sin, however, crossed the line — the mistreatment of the innocent, widows, orphans and the poor.
Hashem reminds Am Yisrael how He lovingly took them out of Egypt and led them through the desert for forty years and settled them in the Holy Land. There, He bestowed the gift of prophecy on some and inspired others to become Nazirites. Yet the Jewish people did not respond appropriately, giving wine to the Nazirites and instructing the prophets not to prophesize.
The haftorah ends with an admonition from Hashem, one that also recalls His eternal love for His people: "Hearken to this word which the Lord spoke about you, O children of Israel, concerning the entire nation that I brought up from the land of Egypt. 'Only you did I love above all the families of the earth; therefore, I will visit upon you all your iniquities…'" As opposed to other nations to whom Hashem does not pay close attention, Hashem's love for His nation causes Him to punish them for their misdeeds, to cleanse them and prod them back onto the path of the just.
“And he told it to his father and to his brothers, and his father rebuked him” (37:10)
Why did Yosef choose only to relay his second dream which contained the sun, moon and stars to his father, Yaakov and overlook his first dream about the sheaves?
9th of 54 sedras; 9th of 12 in Bereishit. Written on 190 lines, ranks 28th. 4 Parshiyot; 3 open, 1 closed. 112 pesukim - ranks 24th.
1558 words - ranks 24th. MITZVOT
No mitzvot are counted from Vayeishev.
Rashi (Rabbi Shlomo be Yitzchak 1040-1105) seems to point to the logistics of the matter. Yosef finished relaying all his dreams to his brothers and he then went and told the final dream to his father, which seemed to have been the one that left the brothers hating him the most. The Ramban (Rabbi Moshe ben Nachmanides 1194 - 1270) answers that Yosef comprehended the true meaning of the dreams and that the second dream included reference to his father. In the second dream the sun represented his father Yaakov. This is why Yaakov rebuked Yosef, as Yaakov realized that Yosef understood fully well the meaning of his dream and emphasized the need to tell his brothers about it. Had he felt that Yosef did not grasp the true meaning of the dream, Yaakov would have refrained from admonishing him.
Shabbat Shalom
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THE PERSON in the parsha
THE PERSON IN THE PARSHA
BY RABBI DR. TZVI HERSH WEINREB OU EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT, EMERITUS
BY RABBI DR. TZVI HERSH WEINREB OU EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT, EMERITUS
“We’ll Skip This Next Story”
It was in the second or third grade that I began to study Chumash. I remember beginning at the beginning, with Parashat Bereshit. It must have been in third, or perhaps even fourth, grade that we reached this week’s Torah portion, Vayeshev (Genesis 37:1-40:23).
Generally, we studied the text carefully, one verse at a time. We translated each phrase into a combination of Yiddish and English. The teacher supplemented each lesson with some of Rashi’s commentary and stimulated our interest by sharing stories from the Midrash. Occasionally, we would skip over a passage, usually one which only contained a long genealogy or list of successive generations.
To this day, I remember when we began reading the highly dramatic story of Yosef and his brothers. We all identified with Yosef, of course, and were frightened and angry when his brothers sold him into slavery. We were shocked to learn that it was Yehuda who suggested that rather than throwing Yosef into a pit ridden with snakes and serpents, from which Yosef could never emerge alive, it would be better to sell him to a caravan of Ishmaelites who were passing by. Yehuda’s influence over his brothers was so strong
that they complied, extracted Yosef from the pit, and delivered him into the hands of the Ishmaelites for twenty silver coins. And so, Yosef was taken to Egypt.
We were then brought to tears when the brothers informed their father Yaakov about Yosef’s whereabouts. “They took Yosef’s distinctive robe, slaughtered a goat, and dipped the robe into the blood. They then sent (vayeshalchu) the magnificent robe and brought it to their father saying (vayomru), ‘This is what we found, please recognize (haker na) whether this is your son’s robe or not. He recognized it (vayakira vayomer), ‘This is indeed my son’s robe! A wild beast has devoured him. Yosef has been torn to bits!’ Yaakov tore his garments, placed sackcloth around his waist, and mourned his son for many days. He could not be consoled and kept saying, ‘I will go down to the grave grieving for my son.’” (Genesis 37:31-36, freely translated). We returned to the classroom the next day, eager to learn of Yosef’s fate, hoping to proceed to chapter 38 and hear the rest of the story. How disappointed we were when the teacher informed us that “we will skip the next story.” He did not tell us why, but quietly, almost ashamedly, notified us that chapter 38 was not about Yosef at all but was about something that would not interest us. Raising his voice a bit, he informed us that we will next learn all about Yosef. He had us open our Chumashim and turn to chapter 39, where we immediately read, “And Yosef descended to Egypt.” From there onward, we
learned the rest of his story.
What was the story in chapter 38, and why did we skip it? If indeed it was not about Yosef, then why was the suspenseful narrative of Yosef’s tribulations being interrupted? Years later, I came to know that chapter 38 contained the story of Yehuda and Tamar and that our teacher had decided that we were too young and immature to learn about their relationship. But I’ve remained puzzled for many years questioning why the Torah interrupted the story of Yosef with this digression into the story of Yehuda and Tamar.
Among the many answers offered to this question, I’ve come to favor one approach to most others. It is the approach of an Italian rabbi and famous bible scholar and professor in Israel, Umberto Moshe David Cassuto (1883-1951). He served as chief rabbi of his native Florence, was a professor of Hebrew at the university there, and eventually was appointed chair of Bible studies at Hebrew University, Jerusalem. He was a major opponent of so-called “Higher” biblical criticism and maintained forcefully that we must, in his words, “penetrate to the innermost meaning of the Biblical passages and draw from the texts themselves the answers to our questions. Let us consult the book; let us listen to the verses and hear what they tell us.”
It is here that I must assume that the reader is familiar with the story of Yehuda and Tamar. Otherwise, please read chapter 38 yourselves, in Hebrew preferably, or in a good English translation if necessary. Following Professor Cassuto, I will focus only on the denouement of the story, its final episode, chapter 38, verses 25 and 26 especially. There, Yehuda, having suspected his pregnant former daughter-in-law Tamar of
harlotry, condemns her to death by fire. He does not realize that he himself fathered the child (or twin children) that she carries. She is taken to the site of her execution and “she sends to her father-in-law and says (shalcha … laymor), ‘Please recognize (haker na) to whom this signet ring and threads and staff belong (note: these are the very objects that he gave to her as payment for her intimacy with him, at the time not knowing her identity).’ Yehuda recognizes these objects and says (vayaker Yehuda vayomer), ‘she is more righteous than me!’”
If you’ve been reading this carefully, you have noticed the striking phenomenon of the phrases “and she sent to her father-in-law saying,” “and she said please recognize,” “and Yehuda recognized and said,” in chapter 38, which are almost identical to the phrases “and they sent the robe… and they said,” “please recognize whether this is your son’s robe,” “and he recognized it and said,” in chapter 37.
In an essay Professor Cassuto published in 1929, he wonders, “Can this be mere coincidence? Or do the phrases in chapter 37 serve as background for the frightful sense of bereavement experienced by Yaakov when he is confronted with the image of his favored son torn to pieces by a wild beast. Could Yaakov’s trauma not be seen as Yehuda’s fault? Could not the Judge of the World have punished Yehuda, whose idea it was to sell Yosef into bondage, by having him suffer similar trauma by being confronted by his sinful, albeit unintentional, illicit relationship with his daughter-in-law? Just as Yehuda and his brothers caused Yaakov to tragically “recognize” the death of his beloved son, so was Yehuda destined to “recognize,” to his horror and shame, the objects that were
sent to him forcing him to “recognize” and confess his guilt.”
I find Professor Cassuto’s approach ingenious and just one example of the power of “listening to the verses and hearing what they tell us.”
I’d like to conclude with words of Professor Cassuto as he ended his inaugural address when he assumed his position at Hebrew University. It is a prayer as suitable now as it was then in 1939:
“Just as the books of Scripture proved a source of a blessing for our forefathers, may it be so too for us, for our children and our children’s children. May they raise our spirits and embolden our hearts to realize our aspirations and to achieve the aims toward which we have directed our being, the renewal of the people of Israel upon the Land of Israel.”
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Covenant & Conversation
COVENANT & CONVERSATION
THOUGHTS ON THE WEEKLY PARSHA
Thoughts on the Weekly Parsha
RABBI LORD JONATHAN SACKS ZT"L
RABBI LORD JONATHAN SACKS ZT"L
FORMER CHIEF RABBI OF THE UNITED HEBREW CONGREGATIONS OF THE COMMONWEALTH
FORMER CHIEF RABBI OF THE UNITED HEBREW CONGREGATIONS OF THE COMMONWEALTH
May the learning of these Divrei Torah be תמשנ
HaRav Ya'akov Zvi ben David Arieh zt"l
What is the Theme of the Stories of Genesis?
One of the most fundamental questions about the Torah turns out to be one of the hardest to answer. What, from God’s to Abraham in Genesis 12 to the death of Joseph in Genesis 50, is the basic religious principle being taught? What does the entire set of stories about Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob and their wives, together with Jacob’s sons and daughter, actually tell us? Abraham brought monotheism to a world that had forgotten it, but where do we see this in the actual text of the Torah itself?
Here is the problem: The first eleven chapters of Genesis teach us many fundamentals of faith: that God brought the universe into being and declared it good; that God made the human person in His image; that God gave us freedom and thus the ability to do not only good but also bad; that the good is rewarded, the bad punished and that we are morally responsible for our actions. Chapters 8 and
9 also tell us that God made a covenant with Noah and - through him - with all humanity. It is equally easy to say what the rest of the Torah, from Exodus to Deuteronomy, teach us: that God rescued the Israelites from slavery, setting them on the road to freedom and the Promised Land; that God made a covenant with the people as a whole on Mount Sinai, with its 613 commands and its purpose, to establish Israel as a kingdom of priests and a holy nation. In short, Genesis 1-11 is about creation. Exodus to Deuteronomy is about revelation and redemption. But what are Genesis 12-50 about?
Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob all recognise God. But so do non-Jews like Malkizedek, Abraham’s contemporary, who is described as a “priest of God most high” (Gen. 14:18). So even does the Pharaoh of Joseph’s day, who says about him:
‘Can there be another person who has God’s spirit in him as this man does?’ (Gen. 41:38)
God speaks to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, but He does likewise to Avimelech king of Gerar (Gen. 20:3-7), and to Laban (Gen. 31:24). So what is special about the patriarchs?
They seem to teach no new principle of faith. Other than childbirth and rescue from danger, God performs no world-transforming miracles
through them. They deliver no prophecies to the people of their generation. Further, apart from an ambiguous hint when the Torah says that Abraham and Sarah took with them on their journey “the souls they had gathered” (Gen. 12:5), which may refer to converts they had made, but may equally merely refer to their servants, they attracted no disciples. There is nothing explicit in the text that says they sought to persuade people of the truth of monotheism or that they did battle against idolatry. At most there is a story about how Rachel stole her father’s teraphim (Gen. 31:19), which may or may not have been idols.
To be sure, a persistent theme of the patriarchal stories is the two promises God made to each of them, namely that they would have many descendants and that they would inherit the land of Canaan. But God also makes promises to Ishmael and Esau, and the Torah seems to go out of its way to tell us that these promises were fulfilled before the promises were fulfilled for the children of the covenant. About Esau’s children, for example, it says: These are the kings who ruled in the land of Edom before any king reigned over the Israelites.1 (Gen. 36:31)
So the question is real and puzzling. What was so different about the patriarchs in Genesis that we spend so many chapters on them? What new component did they bring to the world? What difference did monotheism make in their day?
There is an answer, but it is an unexpected one. One theme appears no less than six (possibly even seven) times. Whenever a member of the covenantal family leaves his or her own space and enters the wider world of their 1. See Gen. 25:12-18 for the account of Ishmael’s children and God’s fulfilment of His promise.
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contemporaries, they encounter a world of sexual free-for-all.
Three times, Abraham (Gen. 12 and Gen. 20) and Isaac (Gen. 26) are forced to leave home because of famine. Twice they go to Gerar. Once Abraham goes to Egypt. On all three occasions the husband fears he will be killed so that the local ruler can take his wife into his harem. All three times they put forward the story that their wife is actually their sister. At worst this is a lie, at best a half-truth. In all three cases the local ruler (Pharaoh, Avimelech), protests at their behaviour when the truth becomes known. Clearly the fear of death was real, or the patriarchs would not have been party to deception.
In the fourth case, Lot in Sodom (Gen. 19), the people cluster round Lot’s house demanding that he bring out his two visitors so that they can be raped. Lot offers them his virgin daughters instead. Only swift action by the visitors – angels – who smite the people with blindness, saves Lot and his family from violence.
In the fifth case (Gen. 34), Shechem, a local prince, rapes and abducts Dina when she “went out to visit some of the local girls.” He holds her hostage, causing Shimon and Levi to practise deception and bloodshed in the course of rescuing her and avenging her abduction. Then comes a marginal case (Gen. 38), the story of Judah and Tamar, more complex than the others and not part of the overall pattern. Finally there is the sixth episode, in this week’s Parsha, when Potiphar’s wife attempts to seduce Joseph. Failing, she accuses him of rape and has him imprisoned.
In other words, there is a continuing theme in Genesis 12-50, a contrast between the people of the Abrahamic covenant and their neighbours, but it is not about idolatry, but rather about
adultery, promiscuity, sexual license, seduction, rape, and sexually motivated violence.
The patriarchal narrative is surprisingly close to the view of Freud that eros is one of the two primal drives governing human behaviour (the other is thanatos, the death instinct), and the view of at least one evolutionary psychologist (David Buss, in his books The Evolution of Desire and The Murderer Next Door) that sex is the main cause of violence amongst humans.
This gives us an entirely new way of thinking about Abrahamic faith. Emunah, the Hebrew word normally translated as faith, does not mean what it is taken to mean in English: a body of dogma, a set of principles, or a cluster of beliefs often held on non-rational grounds. Emunah means faithfulness, loyalty, fidelity, honouring your commitments, doing what you said you would do and acting in such a way as to inspire trust. It has to do with relationships, first and foremost with marriage.
Sex belongs, for the Torah, within the context of marriage, and it is marriage that comes closest to the deep resonances of the biblical idea of covenant. A covenant is a mutual act of commitment in which two persons, honouring their differences, each respecting the dignity of the other, come together in a bond of love to join their destinies and chart a future together. When the prophets want to speak of the covenantal relationship between God and His people, they constantly use the metaphor of marriage.
The God of Abraham is the God of love and trust who does not impose His will by force or violence, but speaks gently to us, inviting an answering response of love and trust. Genesis’ argument against idolatry – all the more impressive for being told obliquely, through
a series of stories and vignettes – is that it leads to a world in which the combination of unchecked sexual desire, the absence of a code of moral self-restraint, and the worship of power, leads eventually to violence and abuse. That domestic violence and abuse still exist today, even among religious Jews, is a disgrace and source of shame. Against this stands the testimony of Genesis that faithfulness to God means and demands faithfulness to our marriage partners. Faith – whether between us and God or between us and our fellow humans – means love, loyalty, and the circumcision of desire.
What the stories of the patriarchs and matriarchs tell us is that faith is not proto- or pseudo-science, an explanation of why the natural universe is as it is. It is the language of relationships and the choreography of love. It is about the importance of the moral bond, in particular as it affects our most intimate relations. Sexuality matters to Judaism, not because it is puritanical but because it represents the love that brings new life into the world. When a society loses faith, eventually it loses the very idea of a sexual ethic, and the result in the long term is violence and the exploitation of the powerless by the powerful. Women suffer. Children suffer. There is a breakdown of trust where it matters most. So it was in the days of the patriarchs. Sadly, so it is today. Judaism, by contrast, is the sanctification of relationship, the love between husband and wife which is as close as we will ever get to understanding God’s love for us.
These weekly teachings from Rabbi Sacks zt”l are part of his ‘Covenant & Conversation’ series on the weekly Torah teaching. With thanks to the Schimmel Family for their generous sponsorship, dedicated in loving memory of Harry (Chaim) Schimmel. Visit www.RabbiSacks.org for more.
PROBING THE PROPHETS
BY RABBI NACHMAN (NEIL) WINKLER FACULTY, OU ISRAEL CENTER
Yehudah vs. Shomron
The navi Amos, whose message is read as this week’s haftarah, was tasked by Hashem to censure Israel for their unethical ways. Although he himself was a resident of Tekoa in Yehuda, G-d sent him to address the Northern Kingdom of Samaria, Shomron, (as was his contemporary, Hoshe’a).
In the very opening verse of our haftarah Amos condemns the judicial system of Shomron for widespread bribery - “al michram bakesef tzaddik” – for “selling” the innocent for silver, a phrase that Chazal see as an intimation to the sale of Yosef, as found in our parasha. In order to better understand the complete message of Amos, however, we would be wise to review the earlier condemnations that the navi directed against Shomron’s neighboring nations.
The prophet begins his sefer by first criticizing the nations of Aram, Philistia, Phoenicia, Edom, Ammon, Mo’av….and even Yehuda, with each censure introduced by the phrase
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“for these three sins of…., Hashem will pardon – but for the fourth, he will not”. Only after this rather lengthy “prelude” does Amos begin to denounce Shomron for her iniquities, the divine mission he was charged to carry out. And this is where our haftarah begins.
Interestingly, we find that, while Amos delineates the list of sins committed by each nation –the litany of sins committed by those in Yehudah, the very record of offenses that precedes those of Shomron, is rather short. When the prophet condemns the Southern Kingdom of Judea for their crimes, he includes only one sin: “Al ma’osam et Torat Hashem” – their abandonment, or, more condemning, their spurning of G-d’s Torah. This one sin, however, is the very source of ALL of their misdeeds, offenses and transgressions, for such impudent defiance of Hashem’s Torah is what encourages such appalling behavior. We would imagine that there is little worse than that.
However, in G-d’s view, it seems that there is.
After all, G-d charged Amos to pour out His divine wrath upon Israel - not Judea. Why?? It was Yehudah that had rejected the Torah!!! …and yet it was Shomron that suffered destruction and exile some 150 years before Jerusalem suffered the same! How might we understand G-d’s puzzling decision to spare Yehuda (if only temporarily) and punish Shomron?
With some hesitation (and trepidation), I offer an approach that might explain Hashem’s actions.
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Patience is necessary for those who follow Isaac's way. But a wise woman taught us that patience is but another name for hope. That woman was Jane Austen, who put these words into the mouth of one of the characters in her great novel, Sense and Sensibility: "Know your own happiness. You want nothing but patience—or give it a more fascinating name: call it hope."
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Although the Judeans were culpable for the crime of forsaking the Torah, a sin that would lead to all others, it was, primarily, an offense against G-d. The transgressions of Samaria as delineated in our haftarah, included more than that of judicial corruption that led to a system of INjustice. The additional trespasses listed by Amos included their unabashed debauchery, their oppression of the poor, their treatment of those less fortunate and even theft of the indigent. Their moral decadence focused primarily on the oppression of others. And so, while we read of Judean immorality in their abandonment of G-d and His Torah, we now uncover the Samaritan depravity in their abandonment of society and its humanity.
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Perhaps, therefore, much as G-d decided to flood all life when Mankind corrupted human society (“chamas”) but determined only to disperse them when they challenged G-d (Migdal Bavel), so too, He may have regarded Shomron’s offenses against Man to be even more dangerous to society than Yehuda’s offenses against G-d.
And perhaps, I submit, Chazal saw this message of Amos as a fitting connection to our parasha, a lesson from the saga of Yosef and his brothers. Perhaps Hashem considered the brothers’ unthinkable treatment of Yosef (and their father) to be even more deplorable than a sin against G-d. Perhaps, that is what the brothers should have considered.
And perhaps, what we might consider when dealing with each other.
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Viewing Others Properly
There are two important lessons that can be derived from the parsha with respect to how we are to view others.
PROPER MENTOR
In the opening of the parsha we are told: ....הנש
The following is the chronicle of the descendants of Yaakov:Yosef was 17 years old….
The parsha begins with a depiction of Yaakov’s descendants, and rather than listing them in age order, Yosef appears first. In fact, he is not followed by any of Yaakov’s other sons. Rashi is troubled by this portrayal and offers several explanations. One of Rashi’s suggestions is as follows: ויז
facial features
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resembled Yaakov’s.
The Bat Ayin interprets this phrase in a broader sense. Not only did Yosef’s physical appearance resemble that of Yaakov, but Yosef sought to follow in his father’s footsteps so that his actions and his Avodat Hashem would resemble that of his father.
In fact Onkelos interprets the phrase ןב
as ”םיכח רב“ perhaps from the root of תוכחל – as we state with respect to Mashiach- ול הכחא – Yosef yearned to be like his father.
When faced with a challenging situation alone with Potifar’s wife, what enabled Yosef to restrain himself was the thought of his father? How would his father react in this situation? (see Sota 37). That infused Yosef with the strength to withstand temptation and act in a moral and ethical manner.
In life, one needs to select a well-respected mentor who can serve as a personal example. Someone who can be a guiding light. That may be a Rav, parent, friend or other worthy individual. It worked for Yosef and will facilitate maintaining our moral compass.
FROM AFAR
The second lesson is derived from the pasuk: קוחרמ ותוא ואריו – They saw him from afar (Bereshit 37:18). When Yosef follows his father’s instructions to seek his brothers, we are told that they see him from afar as he approaches. Rav Soloveitchik (Masoret Harav) interprets this pasuk as follows. At the moment Yosef comes close
to them, they rejected him. They could not perceive the hidden beauty within his soul. The coat of many colors covered what was taking place underneath. Had they been able to pierce the external view, they would have been able to recognize him for who he was.
At times we may view others “from afar” – קוחרמ People we see in shul each Shab- . bat and greet with a smile and a Shabbat Shalom (or good Shabbos). Yet, we really don’t build any understanding of those individuals beyond exchanging superficial greetings. Perhaps if we made an effort to inquire and get to know others, we would recognize their special qualities and gain a new respect for them.
We ought to internalize these two lessons. First, to seek a mentor to whom to look towards to ensure that we make the right decisions. Second, to avoid viewing others from afar. To avoid making generalizations about others based on their outward appearance, but to see through their “coat” and recognize their true personality.
One of the reasons given for the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash is due to תאנש םיחא – baseless hatred. Some suggest, to bring the redemption, we need to correct that with םניח תבהא – baseless love. The truth is – we should not love someone for no reason. We ought to be able to find some good in another that we can appreciate. To do so, we cannot view them “from afar”. May we be able to select the proper אמגוד ישיא (personal example), and view others favorably so that we can merit the geula.
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At the time, it seemed like the best thing to do. Reuven turned to his brothers and said, “Hashlichu oto el habor hazeh asher bamidbar ve’yad al tishlichu bo lema’an hatzil oto me’yadam le’hashivo el aviv – You can throw him into this pit in the desert and you won’t have to lay a hand on him. His plan was to rescue [Yosef] from [his brothers] and bring him back to his father.” (Bereisheet 37:22) The Midrash notes an amazing lesson to be learned here; how important it is to do a mitzvah with a full heart.
“Had Reuven known that the Torah would write about him that he heard Yosef’s cry, and attempted to save him, he would have carried him off on his shoulders. Had Aharon known that the Torah would write about him that he would see Moshe and rejoice in his heart, he would have gone
Under
out to meet him with instruments and dancing. Had Boaz known that the Torah would write about him that he handed Rus enough grain that she ate and had left over, he would have fed her fattened calves. In the past, the navi would write of the mitzvot of men. Today who writes? Eliyahu and Moshiach – and Hashem adds His seal.” (Vayira Rabbah 34:8) This is puzzling, it seems the midrash is insinuating that had each of them known they would get publicity they would have acted differently. Were these people to whom “airtime” mattered? What is the insight the midrash is trying to share?
Oftentimes we act thinking in the moment and fail to recognize the impact of our actions. Reuven only thought about the present crisis, saving his younger brother. He overlooked the cosmic impact of what would happen, i.e., if Yosef were to die, the entire purpose of Jewish history would have ended, as all twelve tribes were necessary to build the Jewish people. Further, if Reuven would have saved Yosef immediately, Yosef would not have been sent to Egypt and the entire Egyptian exile would not have come to pass.
The Midrash concludes, “today who writes?” When a person does a mitzvah, Eliyahu Hanavi and Melech Hamashiach write it down and Hashem seals what they write. In Shiurei Da’at, Rav Bloch zt”l explains that the kitvei Hakodesh, the holy writings, are continually being written. Eliyahu Hanavi and Melech Hamashiach see how each one of our actions effectuate the coming of geulah.
Rav Pincus zt”l explains the famous Mishnah, “hevei zahir bemitzvah kalah k’vachamura she’ein atah yode’a matan secharan shel mitzvot - be as careful with a minor mitzvah as with a major one, for you do not know the rewards of the mitzvot.” (Avot 2:1) The reward referred to here is not just a reward in this world or the next, rather the Mishnah is telling us that we do not know the limitless significance of mitzvot both for each person and the Jewish people as a whole.
The Chanukah miracle of the cruise of oil is a case in point. The Kohen that searched and found that little jug could never have imagined that his act would lead to a holiday that has been celebrated for thousands of years. Let us invest our actions with fullness of heart, mindfulness, and the realization that we can potentially change the course of all Jewish history with each small act that we do.
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Yud Tes Kislev: Personal Guidance
Rav Pinchas Teitz, zt’l, the legendary teacher and builder of Torah in Elizabeth, New Jersey, was one of the influential educators of the generation. A talmid of the great yeshivos of Ponovezh and Slabodka, in 1941 Rav Teitz founded a network of schools, the Jewish Education Center (now called Rav Teitz Mesivta Academy), and a Yiddish-language Gemara radio program called “Daf haShavua” in 1953. His work made a major impact on world Jewry, as documented in Learn Torah, Love Torah, Live Torah, a masterful biography written by Rav Teitz’s daughter, Dr. Rivka Blau.
Beginning in the early 60’s, at the height of the Communist empire and under threat of the merciless KGB and NKVD, Rav Teitz made twenty two visits to Russia. As the clandestine activities of Chabad-Lubavitch had formed the backbone of underground Jewish life and Torah Judaism there, Rav Teitz formed
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a deeply respectful, personal ‘working’ relationship with the Rebbe. During those visits to the USSR Rav Teitz would smuggle tashmishei kedushah, holy articles such as tefillin and mezuzos for our oppressed brothers and sisters in the USSR, often provided by Chabad shluchim.
Rav Yerachmiel Tilles, noted author and co-founder of the Ascent of Tzfat, relayed the following story:
One summer, as Rav Teitz was preparing to leave for another trip to Russia, a Lubavitcher shaliach arrived at his house with a specific request from the Rebbe, and delivered a pocket sized Sefer haTanya, the foundational book of Chabad philosophy, often referred to as ‘the Written Torah’ of Chasidus. Rav Teitz remarked, ““I was astonished… To cooperate with the Rebbe to deliver basic Jewish necessities to the deprived Jews of Russia was one matter, but to go with a copy of Tanya in my luggage? To Russia? It seemed unnecessarily dangerous. The KGB knows very well what Tanya is. What plausible explanation could I give if it were detected?”
Nonetheless, without any specific instructions of what to do with the Tanya, or who it was intended for, Rav Teitz agreed to take it. After all, if the Rebbe sent it, he must have a good reason.
While walking back to his hotel from the Great Synagogue on the third night of his stay in Moscow, Rav Teitz was grabbed by two young men who forced him into a parked car on a side street. His worst fears dissipated when they humbly identified themselves as Chabad chasidim and explained that their roughness was the only way they could discuss urgent matters with him safely. Both had major life decisions to make, and wanted Rav Teitz to deliver their messages to the Lubavitcher Rebbe.
The older chasid had just found out that he might be in imminent danger — the KGB was actively pursuing him — and he wanted to know whether the Rebbe thought he should flee Moscow and move to another city, or remain and continue working on spreading Torah there.
The younger chasid wanted the Rebbe’s advice whether he should apply for an emigration visa to Israel. He yearned for Eretz Yisrael, but publicly expressing a desire to leave Russia came with tremendous risk, and he currently held an excellent position as an engineer, from which he would be fired as soon as he applied for a visa.
Rav Teitz was very moved by the mesirus nefesh, self-sacrifice and dedication of the two chasidim. He promised to memorize their names and pose their questions for the Rebbe, as having a paper with such information would be too dangerous. When Rav Teitz mentioned that he happened to have a copy of Sefer Tanya that the Rebbe asked him to bring along, they begged for the opportunity to see it. Their excitement was palpable as Rav Teitz removed the pocket sized Tanya from his coat. What a zechus to hold a sefer that less than a week ago had been in the Rebbe’s own holy hands!
While caressing the book, the older chasid
JERUSALEM
gasped in amazement. Too excited to speak, he pointed to what he had uncovered: there was a kneitch! The top corner of page 323 had been folded down, slightly crimped, surely deliberately marking a spot. His eyes grew wide when he read the very first words on that page:
“...He is extremely pressed for time, and finds it utterly impossible to delay...”
“That’s it! That’s my answer from the Rebbe!” he cried, visibly shaking with emotion, “The Rebbe is telling me to hurry and escape from Moscow!”
The younger chasid then began to examine the pocket-sized Tanya, fervently hoping to discover another kneitch. As he carefully turned each page he noticed that near the end of chapter 29, on page 74, another corner was folded
over, marking the page which began with two words: ץראל סנכיהל - “...to enter the Land”
“That’s the answer for me! I should apply to make aliyah to the Holy Land right now!”
The next morning, the older chasid left Moscow with his family, and the younger applied for his exit visa. Indeed, the Rebbe had good reason to send the sefer.
It is at this time that we mark Yud Tes (19th day of) Kislev, the celebration of the release of the Alter Rebbe, Reb Shneur Zalman of Liadi, the author of Sefer haTanya, from prison. More than just a day that remembers the personal liberation of the Alter Rebbe, Yud Tes Kislev marks a turning point in Jewish history. Just two years prior, the Alter Rebbe’s first publication of Sefer haTanya had made many of the previously inaccessible, abstract concepts of Kabbalah and philosophy comprehensible and practically applicable, marking the beginnings of a new era in the spread of Chasidus. Yet this publication also brought fierce opposition. The Alter Rebbe understood his unjust arrest and imprisonment to be part of this spiritual backlash, and his spontaneous exoneration and liberation as a sign that the gates were open to spread the wellsprings of these teachings on an unprecedented scale.
In many ways, Yud Tes Kislev is considered the “Rosh Hashanah of Chasidus”, a sort of ‘birthday’ for the revolutionary movement of spiritual awakening and growth, which, over time, has enabled countless people to access a deeper and more personal connection to Hashem.
The Alter Rebbe made his intention clear, that in writing the Tanya he was providing an opportunity for every reader to enter into yechidus with him, to enjoy a private meeting and receive personal guidance and insight from the teachings within.
If each of us will open our hearts and eyes, and muster some measure of the emunah of a true chasid, there is no doubt that there will be a special kneitch waiting for us… and may merit ץראל סנכיהל, to enter the Land, with the complete and true redemption!
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Chanukah and the War for Holiness and Redemption
When was the last time we celebrated a holiday that felt more relevant today than when it was first instituted? This year, Chanukah is not just a commemoration of events from 168 BCE — it is a story we are living now, with every fiber of our national being.
The parallels between the Chanukah story and today’s state of events are striking. Truth is, the Al HaNissim prayer tells us everything we need to know: The Greeks tried to remove Torah and Jewish laws. Gd delivered the enemies who were many, evil, impure, and degenerates into the hands of the few, righteous, pure and those who cling to Torah. The prayer finishes with describing how the Temple was purified and therefore these days are ones of praise and thanksgiving. (Rav Shmuel Eliyahu recently said all the above are relevant except there is one phrase in the prayer that does not apply in our current war. םישלחה דיב םירובג תרסמ You handed the mighty in the hands of the weak, as today we an army filled with giant םירוביג — brave, fierce, and powerful fighting warriors.)
What does this have to do with the spiritual war of the Greek period, as we know the Greeks were not interested in physically annihilating the Jews but in assimilating
them? They forbade Torah study, Shabbat observance, brit milah, and Rosh Chodesh— cornerstones of Jewish life. Their goal was to sever the Jewish people from their spiritual identity and reduce them to just another culture in the Hellenistic empire.
What relevance does this have to our current war? Everything.
Do not be fooled or blind. This Simchat Torah war is not merely about Gaza, Hezbollah, Yemen, Iran, or Syria, though they are key actors on the stage. This war transcends physical boundaries and political agendas. It is a war for the soul of the Jewish people and our mission in the world. In fact, upon entry into Gaza, soldiers related that each house, office and even kindergarten all had two things in common: ammunition and a picture of Al-Aqsa mosque (Dome of the Rock). Hamas understood what their fight was about. In addition, as Hezbollah fighters were eliminated, their media reported them as killed “en route to Jerusalem”. Our enemies understand very well that this war is much bigger and more significant than mere land and corporeal people.
The terror of October 7th was not merely a physical attack; it was an assault on the very idea of the sanctity of Jewish life. The
atrocities committed were not random acts of war but deliberate acts of desecration aimed at breaking us and our spirit. Jews— men, women, and children — defiled, raped, burned and murdered in cold blood. This was not just a war against a people but against everything holy that the Jewish people represent. As one of Binyamin’s elite commanders (who was completely irreligious) said in their pep talk right before entering Gaza, “‘October 7th was a םשה לוליח (desecration of God’s name) and for this, we fight!”
One can almost hear the words ”ילא ׳הל ימ", whomever is ready to fight for Gd, come with me!
THE WAR FOR JEWISH IDENTITY
This war has awakened something profound within us. My son Binyamin, while serving in Gaza, wrote in his notebook: הז תידוהיה תוהיז לע המחלמ “This war is about Jewish identity.” He is absolutely right. The events of recent months have galvanized Jews across the world. Jews who were distant from their faith are reconnecting. College students who once felt detached from their Jewishness are now attending Shabbat dinners and joining Israel solidarity events. Others have visited Israel for the first time, drawn by a deep sense of connection and purpose.
Within Israel, this awakening has been even more profound. People who once identified as secular, perhaps modern day Hellenists, are turning to prayer, putting on tefillin, and lighting Shabbat candles. Even religious Jews have strengthened and deepened their faith and commitment. Survey after survey, each proving the same: there is a growing recognition that our survival as a nation is not just about military strength but about spiritual resilience. As the Maharal teaches,
JERUSALEM AND THE SURROUNDING AREAS | BEIT SHEMESH | TEL AVIV / CENTER | ESTATES IN MOSHAVIM | NEW CONSTRUCTION PROJECTS ALL OVER ISRAEL
war is a sort of elimination process, one that clarifies and refines, stripping away the illusions we once relied on. Our country’s gates on the borders, our army’s surveillance and intelligence, our weapons and ammunitions, and our alliances with other countries will not save us. Only G-d, our ultimate Savior, can deliver us. Only upon Him can we rely. (Hence the notion that war must proceed the final Redemption)
A CALL TO ACTION
The Chanukah story teaches us how to respond to such challenges. The zealousness of Matityahu in defending Hashem’s honor, the courage of Yehudit in outsmarting and defeating a powerful enemy, the relentlessness and determination of the Maccabees against overwhelming odds — all these qualities are needed today.
This war is about more than territorial defense. It is about ensuring that the Jewish people continue to live in Eretz Yisrael as a holy nation, dedicated to G-d’s commandments. It is about upholding the sanctity of Jewish life, values, and identity in a world that often seeks to erase them. Our modern-day Maccabees—Tzahal—are fighting not just for physical survival but for the honor of Hashem
and the sanctity of His name. Every victory on the battlefield is a testament to the miracles G-d continues to perform for us. These are signs that G-d is with us and loves us, just as He was with the Maccabees.
LESSONS FROM CHANUKAH
The lesson of Chanukah is clear: without trying to understand nor predict God’s ways but learning from our history, when we stand firm in our commitment to holiness, miracles happen. The Hashmonaim refused to compromise on their values, even when it seemed impossible to fight the might of the Greek empire. They refused to use impure oil in the Menorah, even though it would have been halachically permissible in their situation. Their unwavering dedication to purity and holiness opened the gates for G-d’s miracles.
A VISION FOR REDEMPTION
The Chanukah story did not end with the rededication of the Beit HaMikdash, which we are celebrating on the 25th of Kislev. It continued with the ongoing civil wars, and the struggle to purify Jewish life and identity in the face of internal and external enemies of the Hellenists and the Greeks. Today, we have the opportunity to finish what the Hashmonaim began.
If we channel the passion of Matityahu the Kohen, the courage of Yehudit, and the determination of the Maccabees, we can achieve not just a temporary victory but a lasting redemption. We must strive for purity above and beyond what seems necessary. Like the Hashmonaim, we must refuse to settle for anything less than total השודק.
Our prayer must be that this current war ends as the Chanukah story did—with the rededication of the Beit HaMikdash. But we must dream even bigger. If we pray with
sincerity, act with holiness, and fight with unwavering faith, perhaps we will merit the ultimate Ge’ulah: a holy nation united in purpose, and the rebuilding of the permanent Holy Temple with all its glory and splendor, speedily in our days.
This year, as we light the menorah and celebrate the miracles of Chanukah, let us remember, appreciate and thank Hashem that we are living an even greater story. May we see the fulfillment of our prayers and the coming of the ultimate Redemption, where light truly triumphs over darkness.
The Airleys have built Beit Binyamin, a retreat center in Tzfat for those directly affected by the war. Soldiers, Zaka members, security forces, bereaved families and widows can come for respite, relaxation and rejuvenation. For more information and to donate, visit Beitbinyamin.org
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IGO SLOW by Vicky Riskin ▪
YOUR BEST WHISKEY by Suzan
Ehrman ▪ COMING BACK TO LIFE
by Shuki Reich ▪ THE MOST OVERPRICED PIZZA IN NEW YORK by Avraham Kinstlinger, Esq. ▪ ACCIDENTAL REVOLUTIONARIES by Glenn Richter ▪
FOLLOW THE MONEY by Meir Belzberg ▪
WALKING ON WATER by Avraham Singer ▪ I
CAN’T BELIEVE I
SAID THAT TO THE RABBI by Richard
PATIENCE IS ALSO A VIRTUE by Esther Orenstein Lapian ▪ RABBI
RISKIN COME HOME by Perry Davis
▪ PROPHECIES COME TRUE by David Nekrutman ▪ MY LUCKY TIE by
Corman ▪ I WOULDN’T GIVE
STEVE RISKIN MY HAM
SANDWICH by Leah Yerushalmi ▪
Selma Daner ▪
DOODLE-FREE by
Doug Werthheimer ▪ THE RABBI AND SANTA CLAUS by
Yosef Hellman ▪ IT’S ALL IN THE TIMING by Yoni
Ben-Ari ▪ A LOCKER ROOM STORY by Barbara Sutnick ▪
THE POWER OF PRAISE by Mark
Fishman ▪ “NU?” by Elisha Gertner
▪ AN EPILOGUE by Shlomo Gewirtz
They Gasped When They Saw The Book
They Gasped When They Saw The Book
They Gasped When They Saw The Book
“But he’s still with us !” a few friends protested. “Isn’t this book too soon?”
Rabbi Riskin thought otherwise. “ רֹמֱא םיִׁשוֹדְק
“But he’s still with us !” a few friends protested. “Isn’t this book too soon?”
! ” he joked. “We typically wait until our rabbis turn 120 before we share our stories about them. For you to put this book together now is a big דוֹבָכ . I appreciate your lack of patience!”
“But he’s still with us !” a few friends protested. “Isn’t this book too soon?”
Rabbi Riskin thought otherwise. “ רֹמֱא
Rabbi Riskin thought otherwise. “ רֹמֱא םיִׁשוֹדְק תוֹמ יֵרֲחַא ! ” he joked. “We typically wait until our rabbis turn 120 before we share our stories about them. For you to put this book together now is a big דוֹבָכ. I appreciate your lack of patience!”
! ” he joked. “We typically wait until our rabbis turn 120 before we share our stories about them. For you to put this book together now is a big דוֹבָכ . I appreciate your lack of patience!”
“I’ve wanted to be like Rabbi Riskin ever since I first met him when I was a young student. These twenty stories remind me why. Shlomo Gewirtz and his team capture what is unexpected, sacred, funny, and poignant about our rebbe. This is a book of gems."
“I’ve wanted to be like Rabbi Riskin ever since I first met him when I was a young student. These twenty stories remind me why. Shlomo Gewirtz and his team capture what is unexpected, sacred, funny, and poignant about our rebbe. This is a book of gems."
“I’ve wanted to be like Rabbi Riskin ever since I first met him when I was a young student. These twenty stories remind me why. Shlomo Gewirtz and his team capture what is unexpected, sacred, funny, and poignant about our rebbe. This is a book of gems."
▪ Rabbi Jacob J. Schacter is the University Professor of Jewish History and Jewish Thought at Yeshiva University
▪ Rabbi Jacob J. Schacter is the University Professor of Jewish History and Jewish Thought at Yeshiva University
▪ Rabbi Jacob J. Schacter is the University Professor of Jewish History and Jewish Thought at Yeshiva University
"As a business student at Tel Aviv University, I savored these lighthearted glimpses into how a young, modern rabbi grew a 'start -up’ synagogue into an education empire. I found the book fun to read as I discovered Rabbi Riskin’s wit and wisdom as teacher, ‘locker-room buddy,’ and more. With this book in hand, I hope to make his תוֹדִּׁמ my own.”
"As a business student at Tel Aviv University, I savored these lighthearted glimpses into how a young, modern rabbi grew a 'start -up’ synagogue into an education empire. I found the book fun to read as I discovered Rabbi Riskin’s wit and wisdom as teacher, ‘locker-room buddy,’ and more. With this book in hand, I hope to make his תוֹדִּׁמ my own.”
"As a business student at Tel Aviv University, I savored these lighthearted glimpses into how a young, modern rabbi grew a 'start -up’ synagogue into an education empire. I found the book fun to read as I discovered Rabbi Riskin’s wit and wisdom as teacher, ‘locker-room buddy,’ and more. With this book in hand, I hope to make his תוֹדִּׁמ my own.”
▪ Eliezer Tuchman is an esteemed
▪ Eliezer Tuchman is an esteemed
at the Nitzanim
at the Nitzanim
in Jerusalem
in Jerusalem
▪ Eliezer Tuchman is an esteemed
at the Nitzanim
in Jerusalem
“My only complaint is that the book is too short. I encourage all those with a Rabbi Riskin story to send it to GotaRabbiRiskinStory@gmail.com , subject line: ‘Volume 2.’”
“My only complaint is that the book is too short. I encourage all those with a Rabbi Riskin story to send it to GotaRabbiRiskinStory@gmail.com , subject line: ‘Volume 2.’”
“My only complaint is that the book is too short. I encourage all those with a Rabbi Riskin story to send it to GotaRabbiRiskinStory@gmail.com , subject line: ‘Volume 2.’”
▪ Dr. Michael Widlanski is a former
▪ Dr. Michael Widlanski is a former הָאיִׁרְק לַעַב at Lincoln Square Synagogue and author of “Battle for Our Minds: Western Elites and the Terror Threat” (Simon and Schuster )
at Lincoln Square Synagogue and author of “Battle for Our Minds: Western Elites and the Terror Threat” (Simon and Schuster )
▪ Dr. Michael Widlanski is a former הָאיִׁרְק לַעַב at Lincoln Square Synagogue and author of “Battle for Our Minds: Western Elites and the Terror Threat” (Simon and Schuster )
SIMCHAT SHMUEL
BY RABBI SAM SHOR
Program Director, OU Israel Center
BY RABBI SAM SHOR DIRECTOR, TORAH INITIATIVES, OU ISRAEL
As we look ahead to the coming week with excitement and anticipation of celebrating Chanukah, it is important to consider not only the historical significance of this joyous and festive time of year, but also the eternal relevance and meaning inherent in these days of joy.
The Amshinover Rebbe, zy'a explained that Chanukah is really a window that allows us to gaze at the lights of eternity, the light which permeates our homes throughout Chanukah via the neirot we kindle each night, is a glimpse of the lights of eternity. The world was created in seven days, so the eight days of Chanukah represent moving beyond the world of nature and creation, and opening ourselves up to miracles, to events which can change us for all eternity.
The Ohalei Yaakov, Rabbi Yaakov Friedman, zy'a of Husiyatin, was a great Chasidic Rebbe who made aliya to Tel Aviv in 1938, narrowly escaping the Nazi onslaught, to live the last nineteen years of his life in Artzeinu HaKedosha. The Rebbe zt'l, lived during those difficult years of the Shoah, the early struggles to build the State of Israel, and the very challenging early years of Medinat Yisrael. His powerful teachings often give us not only incredibly deep and insightful messages of chizuk and hope, but also a glimpse of life in Tel Aviv during this important period in Jewish history. One particularly beautiful teaching was shared by the Rebbe during Chanukah of 1951.
Chasidim have the tradition to greet one another on Chanukah with the greeting of Gmar Chatima Tova (which of course means may we be sealed for good, and is most commonly associated with Yom Kippur), as Chanukah represents the finalization of the sealing of that which was inscribed during the Yamim Noraim. Now, this Chanukah, this greeting of Gmar Chatima Tova, takes on a dual meeting. Men from Yerushalyim recently visited to ask how we should view the new State which has taken hold here in Artzeinu HaKedosha, and I answered that it represents the Atchalta DeGeula, the beginning stage of our redemption. If indeed we have merited to see the beginning of our redemption, then as we wish one another Gmar Chatima tova, this Chanukah, may we merit to see the gmar, the completion of our redemption, may we merit to greet Mashiach Tzidkaynu this Chanukah!
As our Master, Rebbe Pinchas of Koritz, zy'a taught, each Chanukah, as we kindle our lights, we are given a glimpse of the light of Mashiach. From the Chanukah lights, will come forth the light of Mashiach Tzidkaynu...
The Rebbe of Husiyatin cited the great student of the Baal Shem Tov, Rebbe Pinchas of Koritz that our Chanukah lights symbolize the hope and longing for Mashiach.
It is also taught in the name of Reb Pinchas MiKoritz that the letters on the dreidel, Nun, Sheen, Hay, Gimmel represent an acronymnot solely our familiar acronym associated with the miraculous nature of the Chanukah story, but rather these same letters, explains
Reb Pinchas, are equal in numerical value to Mashiach. Our dreidels remind us that as we recall the miraculous story of Chanukah, that we must also simultaneously look forward and anticipate the days of salvation yet to come.
Of course the Rebbe is referring to a dreidel with a letter sheen and not the letter pay. In fact, when the Belzer Rebbe zy’a made Aliya in 1951, he purportedly sent his shamash to find a dreidel specifically with the letter sheen and not a pay.
Yehi Ratzon, as we light our Neirot this Chanukah, may we merit to witness the proliferation of the light of eternity, to experience miracles, and to greet Mashiach Tzidkaynu as he shines his great light upon the entire world.
Gmar Chatima Tova!
Editor’s Note:
In Rabbi Shor’s column last week, an ad was inadvertently placed which covered an important line of text, acknowledging the source of one of the ideas being conveyed. We apologize for this error, and here is the corrected sentence and acknowledgment as it should have appeared:
“Of course many meforshim offer various interpretations of this incident, where Yaakov is left alone, and then engages in some sort of struggle with a mysterious individual. My distinguished teacher and colleague, Rabbi Ari Kahn, in his beautiful work Explorations offers a rather unique interpretation of our verse:”
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CHANUKAH SECTION Laws & Review
SETTING up the CHANUKIYA
One should prepare his Chanukiya well in advance of lighting time, so that there will not be a delay in lighting at the proper time. Especially so on Friday because things get hectic as Shabbat approaches. (And especially NOT SO for Motza”Sh lighting - no preparation for lighting after Shabbat may be done on Shabbat).
Some have the custom of setting up their Chanukiya in the morning for the evening (this goes for every day – except Shabbat, of course). This not only serves the practical purpose, as above, but it also commemorates the practice in the
Beit HaMikdash called Hatavat HaNeirot, whereby the Kohen (Gadol) tended the Menora and prepared it in the morning for kindling in late afternoon. Since our lighting on Chanukah directly commemorates the lighting of the Menora in the Beit HaMikdash, this suggestion provides a nice “added touch” to the mitzva and symbolism.
AL HANISIM
is added to every Amida and Birkat HaMazon throughout Chanukah. There is no reference to Chanukah in BRACHA MEI’EIN SHALOSH (a.k.a. AL HAMICHYA).
Forgetting AL HANISIM does NOT invalidate either the Amida or Birkat HaMazon.
That means that neither is to be repeated because of the omission.
However, if one realizes the omission before the end of the Amida, AL HANISIM can be said right before YIHYU L’RATZON, with the modified introduction, below. In Birkat HaMazon, an omitted AL HANISIM becomes a HARACHAMAN, right before HARACHAMANHU Y’ZAKEINU, as follows (there are variant texts for this)...
BRACHOT before LIGHTING
Brachot should be recited BEFORE beginning to light the candles. This complies with the general rule for Brachot of Mitzva, that they be recited immediately before performance of the mitzva, if possible. This means, that on the first night, wait until all three brachot are said before lighting the candle. And, even on the eighth night, don’t start lighting the candles until you finish both brachot.
(Some hold that this applies to the first b’racha - the mitzva b’racha, but not necessarily to the other b’rachot. Check with your Rav if you are not sure which opinion to follow.)
PLACEMENT of the CANDLES
Opinions differ, but a common practice is to place the first candle (or oil cup) in the right side of the Chanukiya. If one lights at
the doorpost, then the first candle should be closest to the doorpost, even if it is the left side of the Chanukiya. From the second night on, the custom (one of the customs) is to place the candles (or all) from right to left, and to light it, left to right.
At the doorpost, one adds it from the doorpost out, and lights it starting with the candle closest to the doorpost.
ESSENCE and HIDUR
The essential performance of the mitzva of Chanukah is the lighting of a single candle each night. The custom that we follow of increasing the number of candles each night is a HIDUR MITZVA (enhancement of the mitzva).
It is because the first candle you light fulfills the mitzva, that the b’rachot should be said before any lighting.
One practice that has developed because of the distinction between the first candle and the others, is to begin reciting/ singing HANEIROT HALALU after the first candle is lit, while lighting the others. Alternatively, one can wait until the lighting is done to say HANEIROT HALALU. Stick to family practice, unless good reason to switch.
RIGHT after LIGHTING
One should not just light the Chanukah candles (and sing Maoz Tzur) and then go on to business as usual, but rather one should look at the candles for a while, ponder G-d’s miracles, spend some time with the family talking about the message of Chanukah
and how it relates to our time, play a little dreidel, sing a song or two, have a special Chanukah snack, have some Chanukah fun. And most importantly, the learning of TORAH should be part of lighting. It is recommended to learn some Torah, share a Dvar Torah, have a family shiur... right after candle lighting (or sometime in the evening).
The decrees of the Greeks included a ban on learning Torah. Our celebrating Chanukah marks our freedom from Greek oppression, including the ability to learn Torah in public without fear. So let’s do just that!
INDOORS/ OUTDOORS
The original place for lighting and displaying of the Chanukiya was outdoors at the entrance to one’s home or courtyard.
Over many generations in exile, where lighting outdoors was inconvenient (weather-wise) to say the least, and often dangerous (“neighbors”), the practice evolved to light indoors.
to the original practice of lighting outdoors, which is common in Israel - especially in Jerusalem.
When lighting outdoors, the candles are usually protected from getting blown out by being placed inside a specially made box.
WHEN TO LIGHT Weeknights
There are two opinions as to when is the ideal time to light Chanukah lights during the week (i.e. except for Friday and Motza”Sh, when Shabbat affects the timing, as we will soon present).
When lighting inside the home –for whatever reason - the one place that the Chanukiya should not be placed is where the Shabbat candles usually are. They need to be in an eye-catching, attention-grabbing location so they can serve their function of Publicizing the Miracles. Many people who have come to Israel, still light inside, at the window, as they had been doing in their countries of origin. Others have gone back
Minhag Yerushalayim (which many, but not everyone in Jerusalem follow – and some outside Jerusalem do follow) is to light with the setting of the sun.
Those who light with sunset should have already davened Mincha, and should subsequently daven Maariv at the appropriate time.
THE OTHER OPINION
The “rest of the Jewish world” lights when the “light of the sun has left the sky”, i.e.
is reluctant to send Yishmael away and Yitzchak seeks reconciliation with Yishmael and seeks to bless Esav.
UNTIL WHEN?
Candles must burn at least a half hour after םיבכוכה תאצ. This was the original (time of the Gemara) time period after dark that people were still around outdoors and became the defini tion of the time range for PIRSUMEI NISA, publicizing the miracle.
6th Aliya (25:1-11) Avraham marries Keturah; they have 6 sons. All that Avraham has goes to Yitzchak; these are sent eastward with gifts. Avraham dies at age 175; he is buried by Yitzchak and Yishmael in Ma’arat Hamachpelah. Yitzchak is blessed by G-d: he lives in Beer L’chai Roi. The transition from Avraham to Yitzchak is complete. While G-d has been a silent partner in this parsha, here He completes the generational transfer – He blesses Yitzchak. The Jewish people will be Yitzchak and not Yishmael.
Although in our day, people are out later than this time, the halacha only requires the half hour after stars-out.
7th Aliya (25:12-18) The generations of Yishmael are enumerated. Yishmael dies. His descendants dwell from Egypt to Assyria. Yishmael’s story is brief. He has numerous and powerful offspring. The brevity
A SHORT VORT
However, it is recommended that one use longer candles or more oil to extend this time (somewhat), in recognition of the expansion of the current-day Pirsumei Nisa time-frame. We would further suggest that one’s candles should stay lit at least a half hour after the latest stars-out time, namely Rabbeinu Tam time. This is only a recommendation, not in any way meant to be a halachic ruling.
light early - leaving town, and the like, then PLAG is the earliest.
is to emphasize that the Torah is not as interested in the history of power as in the history of the covenant of G-d with the Jewish people. And that will be told at great length.
LIGHTING for תבש
HAFTORAH CHAYEI SARAH 1 KINGS 1: 1-31
It is preferable to daven Mincha before lighting Chanukah candles, but one should not miss out on a minyan to daven before lighting. Chanukah candles should be lit BEFORE Shabbat candles - even if different people are lighting each. Count on 5-10 minutes before the posted Shabbat lighting time; adjust according to your household’s experience.
The theme of this week’s haftorah echoes the theme in our parsha which mentions both the death of Sarah and Avraham. King David was an older man and a woman was assigned to him to serve him and provide warmth.
Adoniyahu, one of King David’s sons, began to prepare for ascension to his father’s throne. This was despite the fact that King David expressed his wishes that his son Shlomo succeed him.
IN JERUSALEM...
Adoniyahu convinces two very significant personalities - the High Priest and the commander of King David’s armies - to
BY RABBI CHANOCH YERES
Some follow the practice of delaying Shabbat candle lighting for 20 minutes and lighting Chanukah candles right before Shabbat candles.
R av, Beit Knesset Beit Yisrael, Yemin Moshe
When Avraham addresses the people of Cheit, trying to acquire a burial spot for his wife, he says “Ger V’Toshav Anochi Eimachem” (23:4) “A Stranger and a Resident am I with you”
HOW EARLY can one LIGHT?
This seems to be a contradiction. If one is a stranger than he is not a resident, if he is a resident than he is no longer a stranger. What did Avraham mean?
For other cities where candle lighting is 30 min. before sunset one should ask his/her local Rav.
The Magid of Dubno (Jacob ben Wolf Kranz 1741-1804) explains that Avraham watched how he spoke in this tense situation in order to, both, state his truth and be able to keep the peace -Shalom Bayit. Avraham said, on the one hand, “I am a Resident’ due to G-d’s promise to receive this Land and on the other hand, I still need your agreement to purchase a plot. In other words, Avraham implied “I am the resident” and you are the “strangers”, while they understood him as saying that “they” are the residents and Avraham is the stranger. The peace was kept, and Avraham remained true to his ideals. Shabbat Shalom
When necessary, one may light as early as PLAG MINCHA (1¼ halachic hours before sunset). This is by no means preferable, but if circumstances are such that you have to
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HAVDALAH and CANDLE LIGHTING
The general practice, when lighting at home, is to say Havdalah before lighting the menorah.
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Chanukah CANDLE LIGHTING
KAVANA: One should have in mind to fulfill the Rabbinic Mitzva (with Torah backing) of NER CHANUKAH plus the HIDUR MITZVA of the extra candles (each night after the first).
One should acknowledge G-d and thank Him for the Chanukah miracles in particular, and for all His miracles and kindnesses in general.
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Real Life Rescues
An Elderly Man Suffered A Cardiac Arrest On The Street and Was Revived by EMTs
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Real Life Rescues
She was like Aron, who loved peace and pursued peace.
EMT Saves Baby from Severe Allergic Reaction
Following First Taste of Tahini
Yoni thanks Hashem for having the opportunity of having Tziporah in his life, to learn of her caring, patience and happiness, to overcome her challenges. May Tziporah's Neshama be a light onto the world, in a time of darkness, and may her Neshama shine to Gan Eden. Yoni misses Tziporah with tears in his eyes, as Hashem gave him a gift, a crown jewel, now he returns her to Hashem. With thanks and Toda. Love, Yoni
On a recent Tuesday morning in Jerusalem, parents were feeding their 6-month-old baby and introduced him to tahini for the first time. Within minutes, the baby developed a severe allergic reaction. The infant's parents immediately called emergency services, seeking urgent help.
Avi Sivan, a United Hatzalah volunteer EMT, was driving to work when his proximity alert went off, notifying him about the emergency. Avi turned his car around and sped to the scene. Driving through traffic took Avi a few minutes and by the time he arrived a mobile intensive care unit was also pulling up. Avi joined the team in their efforts to save the man’s life.
On Sunday morning, David Afriat hopped on his ambucycle and headed out to exercise. As the volunteer was returning home from his workout, dispatch alerted him to an elderly gentleman in a neighboring building who was struggling to breathe. Within seconds David was at the address, the first medical responder on the scene. Anxious family members were relieved to see help arrive so quickly. Finding the man gasping for air, the United Hatzalah paramedic administered medications to ease his breathing, calming and reassuring the patient’s loved ones as he monitored vitals. David detected signs of irregularities, including low blood pressure, so he attached an IV line for fluids. An intensive care ambulance arrived 15 minutes later and evacuated the patient to the hospital for further treatment and observation.
United Hatzalah volunteer EMT Shalom Klein, alerted to the emergency through his proximity alert system, sprang into action as the first responder on the scene. Arriving promptly, Shalom was confronted with a distressing sight - a baby boy with swollen lips and tongue, struggling to breathe, and covered in a worrisome rash.
Recognizing the symptoms as indicative of an anaphylactic shock, the volunteer knew immediate intervention was crucial. Without hesitation, he administered a life-saving EpiPen injection, delivering a dose of epinephrine to counteract the severe allergic reaction. The powerful medication quickly took effect, and the infant's breathing became less labored. The swelling in the lips and tongue began to subside, providing much-needed relief to the child. As the symptoms continued to recede, the EMT monitored his condition while awaiting the arrival of a mobile intensive care ambulance. Several minutes later, the ambulance team arrived and transported the infant to the nearest hospital for further treatment and observation.
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This man’s condition could have deteriorated rapidly had he been forced to wait for emergency medical care. Thanks to your ambucycle, the patient received the Advanced Life Support (ALS) intervention he needed, seconds after his loved ones picked up the phone and called for help.
Reflecting on the incident, Shalom emphasized the importance of having an EpiPen readily available. "It's a great thing I had an EpiPen in my medical kit," he stated. "An EpiPen can save a person's life within minutes and is a huge help for both EMTs and patients."
In Israel’s most challenging times and in its daily “routine” emergencies, United Hatzalah is there. We continue to pray for the wounded and the safe return of all the hostages.
The combined team intermittently administered chest compressions along with assisted ventilation and shots of adrenaline. The pulse of the man returned numerous times only to fade away again as the EMS teams continued their efforts to stabilize his pulse. After approximately 20 minutes the team succeeded in bringing the man’s pulse back. Avi helped get the man on a stretcher and into the ambulance which transferred him to a nearby hospital.
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After the incident Avi recounted; “I have been a volunteer EMT for a while and the main reason I volunteer is to save people in cases such as this. Being an EMT is truly fulfilling, even though it comes with a lot of responsibility and makes me miss some events in my life. I'm willing to do it because it saves the lives of others.”
GEULAS YISRAEL
GEULAS YISRAEL
RABBI MOSHE TARAGIN
RAM YESHIVAT HAR ETZION
MAGGID SHIUR ALL PARSHA AND ALL DAF, OU.ORG
Please continue to pray for my son
Noam Avraham ben Atara Shlomit
Geulah “In” Many Stages and “On” Many Stages
We often imagine redemption as a sweeping, dramatic act of divine intervention — sudden, electric, and transformative. Overnight, the world as we know it, is utterly transformed.
Our first geulah unfolded in precisely this manner: swift and dramatic. םירצמ
On that fateful night, Hashem descended into Egypt and into the depths of human history, shattering a defiant empire and forcing it to its knees. The redemption erupted on the streets and alleyways of Egypt. By morning, the landscape of Egypt was unrecognizable, shrouded in devastation.
Only seven days later, another dramatic scene unfolded, this time not in the streets of Egypt but along the roaring waters of the Yam Suf. Pharaoh, having recovered his arrogance, pursued us into the wilderness, trapping us against a raging sea. Once again, the transformation
was sudden. By daybreak, we had crossed through the dry seabed, standing safely on the other side, as the Egyptians were swept away by the crashing waves of divine justice.
Our first geulah – which unfolded in two acts separated by a mere seven days- was swift and concentrated. The first act played out in the streets of Egypt, and the second erupted at the shores of the Yam Suf. Each moment reshaped the world and etched the power of Hashem into our collective memory.
DIFFERENT “STAGES”
There is, however, another form of redemption—one that is gradual and understated. It lacks the drama of thunderous miracles and is often subtle, sometimes almost imperceptible. This type of redemption is not a single, sweeping event but a process carefully crafted from various threads. It unfolds over time, emerging from a culmination of events that occur across different stages and contexts. It is a process of quiet transformation, where divine orchestration unfolds behind the scenes, gradually reshaping the world.
A CONSTRUCTION PROJECT
Chazal compare redemption to both a sunrise and a construction project, two metaphors that reveal distinct aspects of the redemptive process.
A sunrise is a focused and singular event. Daybreak occurs on the eastern horizon as the warm light of the sun slowly emerges, illuminating the world. It is a majestic yet concentrated phenomenon, confined to one stage.
In contrast, a construction project is a
multifaceted process that occurs simultaneously on many fronts. Architects and engineers carefully coordinate a diverse array of tasks, with different teams working in unison. In modern construction, workers pour cement, electricians install wiring, plumbers lay pipes, roofers build above, and structural teams secure support beams.
This metaphor of a building project suggests that redemption, too, can emerge from a coordinated series of events occurring across various arenas. It reflects a gradual, multi-layered process, where each piece is essential to the grand tapestry of geulah.
A SCATTERRED FAMILY
Parshat Vayeishev embodies this second model of geulah- gradual and complex. Of course, the storylines of Vayeishev do not immediately lead to geulah but instead set the stage for the descent to Egypt—a necessary precursor to our eventual return to Israel.
Avraham had already been informed that his descendants would descend into a foreign land, only to return generations later. From the vantage point of Ya’akov and his family, though, this prophecy seemed remote. Ya’akov and his children were firmly rooted in Israel. They were prosperous, independent, and had no apparent need to descend into the morally corrosive culture of Egypt. It seemed as though history was at a standstill.
MOVING FORWARD
The rivalry between Yosef and his brothers shattered the historical inertia, plunging the family into chaos. This discord would eventually propel them toward Egypt and eventually toward geulah.
In the midst of parshat Vayeishev, this grand historical process is barely visible. All that is apparent is a family in
turmoil—fractured, scattered, and seemingly broken. What appears as familial disarray is, really the beginning of a larger divine plan, unfolding subtly and gradually. The geulah is not yet discernible, but the threads are being woven into a tapestry that will shape Jewish history.
To paraphrase the midrash, in parshat Vayeishev “Yosef sits shackled in a dark dungeon, Ya’akov is overwhelmed and drowning in inconsolable mourning, Yehuda has married a foreign wife, and Reuven is burdened by unrelenting guilt.” It is a scene of chaos, fragmentation, and despair.
Yet, the Midrash assures us that Hashem is quietly weaving the intricate threads of history. Everything is unfolding according to plan. These seemingly disjointed events, fraught with pain and confusion, will converge into a unified historical process, leading to the descent into Egypt, the crucible of slavery, and, finally, the miraculous geulah.
In parshat Vayeishev history is moving forward on multiple fronts, though from the human perspective, it is impossible to discern how these scattered elements will align into a redemptive whole. Sometimes, the flow of history mirrors the simplicity and clarity of a sunrise. At other times, it is a construction project, where disparate efforts are woven together into a single, grand design.
UNDER CONSTRUCTION
Much about our modern return to Israel has resembled a construction project. There has not yet been one immaculate, spectacular event that has completely and irreversibly reshaped history. Instead, everything has unfolded in stages, across multiple fronts.
In the 19th century, Jews were invited to leave the ghettos and join broader society.
Though this had damaging effects on religious commitment, it also connected us to the prevailing cultural winds. Those cultural winds of the 19th century were the gusts of nationalism that swept across Europe. Whereas in the past identity was rooted in religion, in the 19th century people began to think about nations, land, and peoplehood. Nationalist fervor also stirred within the Jewish world, sparking a deep desire to reclaim a Jewish homeland. Modern Zionist was born.
In the 20th century, World War I redrew the maps of Europe and the Middle East, marking a pivotal shift in the trajectory of Jewish history. Palestine, once under Ottoman control, came under British rule, which emerged from the war as one of its major victors. The British, influenced by two centuries of Jewish presence and advocacy within the United Kingdom, acknowledged the legitimacy of a Jewish homeland through the 1917 Balfour Declaration.
However, the establishment of the State of Israel required more than ideological support; it necessitated the backing of a global superpower willing to lend its political clout and material resources to the cause of Jewish restoration. That superpower emerged in the form of the United States, which steadily gained prominence throughout the 20th century.
The post-war era during the second half of the 20th century was defined by Pax Americana—a period in which the United States wielded unparalleled military, political, diplomatic, and economic influence across the globe. This burgeoning influence set the stage for American support, which would prove critical in the eventual establishment of the modern State of Israel.
About two decades after the birth of our
state, the Arab world, fueled by dreams of pan-Arabism, sought to annihilate us. Today, much of the opposition to the Jewish state is driven by radical, fanatical Islam. Sixty years ago, it was the fervor of pan-Arab nationalism that united our adversaries.
Their threats to annihilate us culminated in the Six-Day War—a miraculous victory that not only ensured our survival but also led to the recovery of Yerushalayim and the biblical heartland.
Events spanning different generations, continents, and vastly diverse contexts have all converged to propel the redemptive historical process forward. This journey has resembled a construction project far more than a sunrise—intricate, gradual, and often bewildering in its complexity.
At each juncture, it was difficult to discern how these disparate events contributed to the unfolding redemption. Yet, with the clarity of hindsight, the hand of Hashem becomes unmistakable. Every fragment, every twist of history, has found its place within the grand mosaic of our return.
OUR CURRENT WAVE
Are we witnessing yet another stage in this intricate construction process? In just over a year, many of our enemies have seemingly vanished into thin air. While we still face threats on multiple fronts, the catastrophic situation we confronted just a year ago has significantly shifted. Remarkably, these changes didn’t occur in one dramatic moment but unfolded gradually, step by step.
In the aftermath of the heinous attack on our people, Hamas was brought to its knees through our persistent and determined war. Baruch Hashem, Hezbollah refrained from attacking on October 7th, and when their
opportunity arose, they too were swept away like tumbling weeds. Meanwhile, for over a decade, rebel forces silently plotted the overthrow of the Syrian regime—a brutal dictatorship and longtime threat to Israel. Within days, this regime fell, and the once-mighty Syrian army, the largest in the Middle East outside of Israel, dissolved into irrelevance. What appeared to be an internal Syrian struggle between authoritarian rule and insurgents has unexpectedly yielded a strategic boon for our people.
It is too early to celebrate or ignore the dangers that still loom, but it would be equally shortsighted to overlook the divine interventions we have been privileged to witness. Only time will reveal the ultimate significance of other unfolding events, such as the war in Ukraine, the political polarization in the United States, and the cultural battles tearing through modern civilization. Each of these developments holds potential implications for Jewish history and the redemptive process. This is a construction project, not a sudden sunrise. The clarity we seek will only emerge when the many complex and interwoven elements of this process reach their culmination. Until then, we watch, we build, and we hope.
Rabbi Taragin’s newest sefer entitled “Reclaiming Redemption Deciphering the Maze of Jewish History (Mosaica)” is now available at: www.reclaimingredemption.com and in bookstores.
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INSIGHTS
The Price of a Pair of Shoes
AMOS 2:6-3:8
Thus said Hashem, For three transgressions of Israel, [I have looked away] but for four, I will not pardon them - for their selling a righteous man for money, and a poor man for shoes.
The Haftorah opens with Hashem’s striking declaration: “I am willing to overlook three sins but not the fourth”. This raises the obvious question: What were the first three sins, and how was the fourth sin so egregious that it could no longer be forgiven?
The Malbim explains that the first three sins are the cardinal ones: idolatry, adultery, and murder. These are undoubtedly grave offenses, but the fourth sin, he says, was
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DIRECTOR, OU WOMEN’S INITIATIVE
injustice—selling acquittals for a paltry sum, as little as the cost of a pair of shoes. Why would injustice be the one sin that Hashem could not tolerate?
The cardinal sins, as severe as they are, are also blatant. They are universally recognized as wrong; perpetrators, victims, and society alike are aware of their evil nature. Injustice, on the other hand, tears apart the very fabric of society in ways that are often subtle and insidious. The paltry price paid for acquittals reflects not only a disregard of justice, but a fundamental devaluation of the individual and community.
Hashem could forgive enormous sins that people acknowledged as sins. But He could not forgive the selfishness and moral blindness that led people to treat justice as a commodity to be bought and sold. This cavalier and destructive approach to the foundation of societal integrity was intolerable.
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In a world still fraught with conflict and division, the need for justice remains as urgent as ever. The navi, Amos, reminds us that justice is not only essential for societal harmony but also indispensable in our relationship with Hashem. When we pursue justice, we align ourselves with His will, creating a world where His presence can dwell among us.
One of the rarest cantillation marks in the five books of Moshe is the shalshelet, a long “chain” of notes, which only appears four times. Due to its rarity and distinct tones, the shalshelet attracts attention. In this week’s parashah Parashat Vayeshev, it accompanies Yosef’s rejection of Potiphar’s wife’s demand that he bed her:
“ …Yosef was well-built and handsome. And it came to pass after these things, that his master’s wife took notice of Yosef and said, “Lie with me.” But he refused (ןאמיו). He said to his master’s wife, “With me in charge my master does not
concern himself with anything in the house; whatever he has he has put in my hand. No one is greater in this house than I am, and my master has withheld nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?”
(Genesis 39:6-9)
Why does the shalshelet appear here on the word va-yem’aen, “but he refused”?
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Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik thinks that it accounts for the unexpected order of the events. One would expect Yosef to lead with the explanation and then give his decision, yet he begins with a flat-out rejection. He is aware of the distinct possibility that letting the proposition hang in the air even for the few moments it will take to explain himself may lead him to succumb. The chain of the shalshelet represents the unbroken chain of previous generations, the shalshelet ha-masorah, which impels him to reject the idea immediately, before any reasoning even takes form in his mind.1 The shalshelet is also always followed by a pesik, a vertical line inserted by tradition directing the reader to pause. Here, it separates va’yemaen, “but he refused,” from
1. Although the Torah tells us Yosef’s reasoning, the Rav notes that Bereshit Genesis Rabbah, 87:5, records an a fortiori argument that Yosef made. Since one may refuse to perform a mitzvah such as levirate marriage, one must certainly refuse a transgression. By providing this alternative to what we find in the verses themselves, this midrash Midrash is conveying that this was a firm rejection that came to Yosef naturally.
va-yomer, “he said,” making them distinct acts. Yosef’s refusal and statement do not constitute a cause-and-effect relationship. The word va-yema’en is an expression of summary rejection.2
THE JEWISH INSTINCT
Throughout the generations, the Jew’s courage and ability to act without hesitation, compromise, or overthinking has been the secret to our survival. The Rav cites great sages from our past, such as Rabbi Chanina b. Teradyon and Rabbi Akiva, who refused to bow to our spiritual enemies in the face of immense pressure to forsake the Almighty and His law. They defied Roman persecution by assembling groups for Torah study, an act that was not logic-based but instinctive. Rabbi Akiva compared his learning of Torah and attachment to God to oxygen:
The Sages learned: Once, the wicked government [of Rome] decreed that the Jewish people were forbidden to study Torah. Pappus b. Yehudah discovered that Rabbi Akiva was convening public gatherings and studying Torah [with them]. He said to him: “Akiva, are you not afraid of the government?”
He responded to him: “Let me give you a parable. To what is it similar? To a fox that was walking along the river and saw fish moving to and fro. He said to them, ‘What are you fleeing?’ They responded to him, ‘From the nets that men spread for us.’ He said to them, ‘Why don’t you come out onto the dry land? We’ll live together, as my 2. Lustiger, Chumash Mesoras Harav, 1:292. One can suggest that the Rav’s understanding was influenced by a formulation of the Rambam: “One who performs a mitzvah or refrains from committing a sin not on account of any worldly factor — neither terror nor fear nor seeking honor — but because of the Creator, like Yosef the Tzaddik who refused the wife of his master, sanctified the name of God” (Mishneh Torah, Hilchot Yesodei ha-Torah, 5:10).
ancestors lived with your ancestors.’ They said to him: ‘Are you the one of whom it is said that you are the cleverest of animals? You’re not clever, you are foolish! If we have cause for fear in our natural habitat, how much more so in a deadly environment!’
“If it is so when we sit and study Torah, about which it is said, ‘For it is your life and the length of your days’ (Deuteronomy 30:20), then how much more so if we neglect it!”3
The Rav genuinely believes that what was true of our great sages was also true of the so-called simple Jew:
“The martyrs of the Jewish people who sacrificed their lives for the glory of God during the infamous periods of forced conversion were not always the scholars, rabbis, or preeminent halachic authorities. Dormant in the soul of the simple Jews lay engraved the trait of va-yema’en. The Jewish instinct drove and impelled them to sacrifice themselves for kiddush Hashem (sanctification of God’s name).” 4
3. Berachot 61b.
4. Lustiger, Chumash Mesoras Harav, 1:293.
Rabbi Goldscheider’s most recent OU Press Publication, “Torah United” on the weekly Parsha, can be ordered directly from Rabbi Goldscheider at Aarong@ouisrael.org at a special price for Torah Tidbits readers.
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Chanukah Candles Inside and Outside?
Question: I grew up lighting Chanukah candles inside the house. In my community, the uniform practice is to do so outside. I think that is great, but I miss seeing them inside my house. Is it permitted to light a second chanukia indoors (could it be bal tosif)? If permitted, what is the best way to do it?
Answer: Little is written about whether lighting halachically unneeded candles on Chanukah is bal tosif. We will start with general rules regarding mitzvot.
Rishonim ask why it is permitted to blow beyond the first set of tekiot on Rosh Hashana. Tosafot (Rosh Hashana 16b) answers that just repeating a mitzva is not bal tosif. The Rashba answers that it is permitted because it follows Rabbinic instruction. (There is a machloket whether the Rashba also accepts Tosafot’s answer – see Minchat Chinuch #454 and Pri Megadim, Orach Chyaim, Intro. I:40.) There are also opinions (see Ra’avad, arguing on Rambam, Lulav 7:7) that using more of a correct mitzvah object than required (e.g., two
Rav Daniel Mann
etrogim), is permitted. It is more lenient when the two objects are used in separate places (see Sukka 31b). On the other hand, maybe the fact that they are both on legitimate parts of one’s house connects them (see later). According to Tosafot and the Ra’avad, then, there is no problem lighting extra chanukiyot, and the Pri Megadim (ibid.) suggests that bal tosif never applies to Rabbinic mitzvot.
There are more basic grounds to say that extra chanukiyot is fine. Even those who argue with Tosafot do not forbid bal tosif for doing more than required regarding every mitzvah. Is it forbidden to say Kri’at Shema or mention the Exodus more than required?! Sometimes, more is a good thing. Classical sources and minhagim support the thesis that we look positively on more pirsumei nisa than required by strict Halacha. The Terumat Hadeshen (I:101) says that a man away from home who can fulfill the mitzva with his wife’s lighting can prefer to light himself based on the concept of mehadrin. Also, when one has lit in the correct place but there is a side of the house where the candles cannot be seen, he should light there too (Shulchan Aruch, OC 671:8). We do this without a beracha, apparently because it is not a real mitzvah (Rama ad loc. based on the Ran, Shabbat 10a of Rif’s pages). There is a minhag to light candles in shul for Shacharit, without any halachic mandate. These are indications (not proofs) that strengthen the logic that bal tosif should simply not apply to Chanukah lightings, which would explain the near silence on the topic. Therefore, Rav
Eretz Hemdah, the Institute for Advanced Jewish Studies, Jerusalem, is headed by Rav Yosef Carmel and Rav Moshe Ehrenreich, founded by Rav Shaul Yisraeli, zt”l, to prepare rabbanim and dayanim to serve the National Religious community in the Israel and abroad. Ask the Rabbi is a joint venture of the OU, Eretz Hemdah, and OU Israel’s Torah Tidbits.
Carmel (one of our roshei kollel) ruled that you need not be machmir and can light freely without a beracha to enhance your experience.
For one who is concerned, despite the above, that there could be a problem, we tersely present some practical ideas. Many posit that if one repeats a mitzvah “with a twist” to remove a doubt, there is no bal tosif. (The Shulchan Aruch’s (OC 34:2) idea of putting on Rashi and Rabbeinu Tam tefillin at the same time is different because they are mutually exclusive, whereas inside and outside lighting can both be fulfillments.)
See (Bemareh Habazak IX:35.) a machloket about putting mezuzot on both doorposts when one is unsure of the correct side. If you have some doubt if your lighting outside is definitely done in the right place/way (see our discussion of the pros and cons on the inside-outside question in Living the Halachic Process, III, D-11) this might eliminate bal tosif questions (see Divrei Yatziv, OC 287). This works better if your wife hears your beracha outside and then lights inside, with the two of you having in mind to be yotzei with the better lighting.
If the lighting is as an extra, other “machmir” ideas include lighting without kavana for a mitzvah before the mitzvah’s time or after the real candles go out. We discourage putting the extra chanukiya in the window, as it goes against the local practice of one, outside lighting, and to use the type of artistic chanukiya (see LTHP, I, D-10) that people like you would use for atmosphere, not mitzvah
Machon Puah for Fertility and Gynecology in Accordance with Halacha
Good Advice
Last time we discussed what is appropriate and beneficial to say to our family members who are facing fertility challenges. Some people find it useful to increase their own knowledge of fertility problems and fertility treatments. There are many good resources that provide accurate and valuable information, and friends and family can use them to understand what their family members are undergoing.
However, one should be very careful not to assume that since they read a website or an article, they possess expert knowledge and can give professional advice to others. Too often I hear of advice given by friends or family that is simply inappropriate for the person’s situation. The advice has been given out of a deep desire to help and be useful, but it can have an adverse effect on the person’s success.
A parent tells their child to visit Dr. X, who was able to help Mrs. Y’s daughter, so he will
DR. ARIE JAFFE
definitely be able to help you as well. But Dr. X is an expert in male fertility and the current case relates to the female factor. Dr. X is not the right person and they should really consult with Dr. Z.
“There was a fascinating program on the television last night and they talked about a new treatment that has 100% success,” the couple is told by a close friend. The program neglected to mention that there are many unwanted side-effects of the treatment and most medical professionals do not recommend it.
It is important to gain information in order to develop more empathy and sensitivity, but we have to be careful not to abuse our position in a way that can be damaging.
During the Vidui we confess yaatznu ra, we gave bad advice. I once heard a question from the late Rabbi Dr. Avraham Yehoshua Hershel Twerski. What is the inclination to give bad advice? The Vidui comes to point out flaws in our character that we need to address and improve. To do so we must understand the impetus that causes us to transgress, to comprehend the evil inclination behind the sin. What pushes us to give bad advice?
He answered that our intention was to give good advice, but we were misinformed, or were not sensitive to the other. We gave advice that seemed good to us but did not benefit the recipient. Repentance requires that we consider first the other person, and only when we know that our advice is good for them, should we impart advice.
More on this next time.
Where do they turn to, those desperate people?
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Adults as well as children are overwhelmed with emotions when they hear about a terrorist attack. When they become more frequent, the feeling of uncertainty and loss of control can create much anxiety. There are certain guidelines to keep in mind the questions they ask. Stay focused. necessary to elaborate or get sidetracked politics or other similar situations. tions should be given in an age appropriate manner. Just like your rules are age priate your discussions should be Having more detailed, graphic conversations is more appropriate with an 18 than old.
Michal Silverstein, MS
Dear T.R.
OU ISRAEL PARENTING COLUMN
Michal Silverstein, MS
Thank you for asking this very relevant and timely question.
Transitions
Part 2
Previously I focused on a child starting a dorm high school and discussed how involved a parent should be in their child’s everyday life.
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to navigate these new challenges on their own. This is not a rejection of the parent but rather a sign of growth, independence and maturity. Instead of taking it as a sign of rejection, have patience and trust in your relationship.
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I’d like to add a few more points regarding the development of the parent child relationship as a child grows. Throughout a parent’s life they will watch their child move through various stages and roles such as serving in the army, being a university student, dating, getting married and becoming a parent themselves. Each of these stages requires a parent to re-evaluate the parent child relationship in order to facilitate growth in the next stage. Sometimes a child will need space or be preoccupied with their studies or relationship and seemingly “not have time” for their parents. They will want to learn how
If you had a close, trusting relationship with your child in the past, then being temporarily distant will ultimately build and strengthen the relationship. A child who confided in their parents when they were young will probably come back and seek their advice also as an adult. The trick is to be open to change as you embark on an adult relationship with your child. That means coordinating new expectations and boundaries that work for both of you where you both feel respected.
It’s important to keep an eye out emotional and physical signs of If your child looks sad, has crying becomes fearful or angry or is experienc ing changes in sleeping and eating he may need extra help processing rent state of events. Be aware of behavioral changes.
Regarding your own emotional important to model emotions in front children. Seeing you express your will allow your child to do the same. being said, there is also a limit. You
As your child grows into an adult, the relationship will only become more layered and complex. Once an adult child marries it’s even more important to have honest conversations and discuss expectations. With patience and understanding, the relationship can grow into something even more beautiful and treasured. Be’hatzlacha
Feel free to send in any parenting questions you may have to parenting@ouisrael.org (Details will be changed to preserve anonymity).
Michal Silverstein has a MS in educational psychology and counseling. She facilitates parenting workshops in and around Jerusalem and maintains a private practice.
MRS. LEAH FEINBERG
OU ISRAEL FACULTY
Prophecy and Personality
In the month of Kislev we begin studying Sefer Trei Asar, a compilation of twelve prophets whose teachings were so brief that the Sages feared that were they to be printed individually they might become lost, and therefore grouped them together into one sefer.
The first of these prophets is Hoshea, who was the elder contemporary of Yeshayahu, constituting a leap back in time from where we left off at the end of Yechezkel. Hoshea marks the transition from Nevi’im Rishonim to Nevi’im Acharonim. This designation is not chronological - the books of Trei Asar overlap with time periods discussed at length in the earlier works. The prophecy of Hoshea initiates several significant changes in the nature of prophecy, leading to the distinction between
the two sets of books.
In the earlier works, prophets warned of punishments that would befall the people in the Land of Israel; Shmuel warned Shaul of his defeat at the hands of the Plishtim, Eliyahu warned of drought, etc. Hoshea is the first of the prophets to warn of exile from the land. While in the earlier books, the prophets spoke of punishments that were close at hand, the later prophets spoke of punishments that would befall the people in the distant future. They therefore had to struggle to concretize the real possibility of the destruction of the Temple and subsequent exile in the minds of the people. This accounts for the difference in style between the earlier and later prophets.1
Another significant change associated with Hoshea is taught in the Talmud. According to Rav, the merit of the Avot that protected Israel ceased at the time of Hoshea.2 While others disagree, there remains the suggestion of a portentous change at this time. Until the time of Hoshea, even in times of sinfulness the Jewish people could rely on the merit of our forefathers to save them from extinction. Beginning with Hoshea, every individual would be held accountable for his own actions and rewarded or punished accordingly.
Hoshea himself stands out from among other Nevi’im in the intensity of his prophecies. The midrash states:
- All other prophets who castigated Yisrael accused them of falling… but Hoshea accused them of complete breakdown, as it says, “For you have failed in your sinfulness.” 3 Hoshea is fierce in his use of analogies, comparing even Hashem Himself in His righteous anger to ferocious animals who devour their prey; so will Hashem devour the people of Israel. 4 Hoshea is as intense in his prophecies of love and mercy as in his prophecies of punishment.
His comparison of the reunion of Hashem and Am Yisrael to the love of an engaged couple who pledge eternal faithfulness 5 is so profoundly beautiful that it was chosen to be recited daily as a man wraps himself in his Tefillin, binding himself to the service of Hashem. The complex episode of Hoshea’s own marriage as described in the first chapters of the book are in keeping with the complexity of Hoshea’s personality.
While some prophecies were given to the prophets to be delivered word for word as they were received, many were left to the imagination and skill of the prophet to formulate in terms that would be most effective in reaching his audience.6 With regard to such prophecies, the gemara states: While identical content may be communicated to more than one prophet, no two prophets communicate using the same style and terminology.7 Hoshea, his contemporaries and those who followed him brought their own circumstances and personalities to bear when transmitting the
word of Hashem to the people of Israel, using every means at their disposal in their attempt to bridge the widening gap between Hashem and His beloved nation. May we continue to be inspired by their creativity and passion as we strive to grow in our own service of and relationship with Hashem.
Mrs. Leah Feinberg is a master educator who taught at the SKA High School for Girls in Hewlett for twenty-one years, also serving as Tanach Department chairperson and New Teacher Mentor. Leah is currently on the faculty of the OU Israel Center and has taught in all three cycles of the OU Women’s Initiative Nach Yomi program
In the OU Women’s Initiative Nach Yomi series, currently in its third cycle, women scholars deliver a daily shiur on the books of Prophets (Neviim) and Writings (Ketuvim) at the pace of a chapter a day. Shiurim are geared toward learners of all levels who would like to participate in the twoyear Nach Yomi study cycle. Visit the OU Women’s Initiative to register for additional content.
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The Art of Crafting Compelling Dating Profiles
Creating a great dating profile is about more than just listing qualities and preferences. It’s about crafting a story — a warm and inviting narrative that inspires curiosity and connection. When done right, a profile becomes a window into someone’s essence, sparking genuine interest and excitement.
1. LEAD WITH POSITIVITY
The way you phrase things has a profound impact on how they’re received. Profiles with negative or critical language— like “no complainers” or “not lazy”—tend to push people away. Instead, frame qualities in a positive light. For example:
• Replace “no complainers” with “someone with a positive outlook on life.”
• Swap “no long-distance relationships” for “looking for someone local to build a close connection.”
• Exchange “not lazy” with “seeking someone hardworking and ambitious.”
This small shift creates an inviting tone that draws others in and sets the stage for connection. There are two psychological principles that explain why positive language is crucial when writing a profile:
1. Perception Management: Negative language triggers defensive responses. Overly critical profiles cause potential matches to become guarded, searching for flaws instead of potential connections.
2. Emotional Resonance: Optimistic, forward-looking language naturally draws people in, inviting curiosity and encouraging others to see the best in a potential partner.
2.
TELL A STORY, DON’T JUST LIST TRAITS
The most engaging profiles go beyond listing attributes and instead tell a story. Use descriptive language to paint a picture of who the person is. Instead of saying, “He likes hiking,” try: “He’s happiest exploring a scenic trail and enjoying the peace of nature.” Stories are memorable and give potential matches a clearer sense of the person’s personality.
3. HIGHLIGHT THE BEST, BUT STAY REAL
While it’s important to emphasize
strengths, a great profile also feels genuine. Nobody is perfect, and that’s okay! Mentioning endearing quirks or fun specifics can make the profile stand out. For example: “He may take twice as long to pick a restaurant, but that’s because he wants every meal to feel special.”
4. FOCUS ON CONNECTION, NOT PERFECTION
A successful profile speaks to the person you hope to attract. Tailor the tone and details to resonate with the ideal match. Whether it’s humor, ambition, or warmth, ensure the profile feels authentic and approachable.
IN CONCLUSION
Crafting a compelling dating profile is about creating an invitation. By focusing on positivity, storytelling, and authenticity, you’re building a bridge to connection. Every word you choose has the potential to bring someone closer to the relationship they’re searching for. And that’s the true art of matchmaking.
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SHOSHANA JUDELMAN
TORAH TIDBITS CONTRIBUTOR
The Power of the Chanukah Lights
When I was 11, we moved to Livingston, NJ and I began learning for my bat mitzvah. My parents arranged for me to meet with Rabbi Moshe Kasinetz, a”h, a Lubavitcher Chassid and the rabbi of our new shul. Since I was
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born on Chanukah, our discussions focused on light and darkness, and he shared with me the concept that “a little light dispels a great deal of darkness.”
This is a life-changing concept.
When you walk into a dark room, all you need is one small match to reveal the contours and contents of the room. One tiny light to soothe your fears and doubts and enable you to move forward. Counter-intuitively, in the deepest darkness, the smallest light can have the greatest impact.
As the darkness and confusion of Golus becomes more overwhelming, the power of the small Chanukah lights becomes more revealed.
Chassidus teaches that the Chanukah candles are a manifestation of the light that Hashem created at the beginning of time. The light of clarity, with which it is possible to “see from one end of the world to the other.” The light that shines through the fabric of the physical world and enables us to see Hashem’s Reality.
Immediately after Creation, Hashem saw that the world was not yet ready for this light. Our Sages teach that Hashem saw that this light would be misused and misunderstood so He “hid the light away until the time to come”- the time of Moshiach. It is, therefore called, זונגה רוא, “The Concealed Light.”
It says in Tehillim:
He shines a light for the upright in the darkness (112:4)
In other words, Tzadikim see this light on a regular basis. The rest of us are given small opportunities to take in little bits here and there- Shabbos candles, pieces of Torah that shine into our hearts and out of our eyes, and the Chanukah candles. These small gifts of light rip through the reality imposed by the world and broaden our ability to see with Geulah eyes. As we internalize more of it, this light can change the way we experience the events around us.
For all of us this year has been a challenging one. A year in which it has seemed almost impossible to find and hold onto the light and the hope it represents.
Chanukah is an opportunity to refill our diminished reserves.
Lighting the Chanukah menorah and spending time looking at her flames then becomes a form of exercise, of absorbing and internalizing more of this special light. Of renewing our belief that we have the tools, the abilities and the potential to overcome the darkness.
The Chanukah candles are very small, but they are an extraordinarily powerful weapon against the darkness. By this light we are enabled to see with greater compassion and less judgement. We can see possibilities where previously there seemed like none. We can find new perspectives, new solutions and new stores of hope. We see with our souls rather than just with our eyes.
As R’ Naftali Tzvi of Ropschitz taught, Chanukah brings Geulah.
May we be blessed to engage with the Chanukah lights in a proactive way, focusing on them and absorbing more and more of the זונגה רוא in order to tap into deeper truths and more emunah. May we merit to understand that in the looking we are developing a
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stronger capacity to find light in the darkness and shine it into each other.
Good Shabbos and a Lichtigen Freilichen Chanukah!
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Shoshana teaches Chassidus for the Shirat David Community in Efrat as well as in Jerusalem for Midreshet Rachel v’Chaya and Shiviti Women’s Institute. She is a guide in Poland with JRoots and co-leads inspirational trips to Ukraine and around Eretz Yisroel. Shoshana has also been a guide at Yad Vashem since 2014.
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Much excitement has surrounded Emunah Cohen and Neta Lax, the two fresh winners of the annual International Bible Quiz. Yesterday I interviewed them and heard their story.
the first time?' Yet I simply forgot it. I thought afterwards that HaShem caused me to forget the answer in order to remind me that I do not know everything, that I am human and not perfect."
the first time?' Yet I simply forgot it. I thought afterwards that HaShem caused me to forget the answer in order to remind me that I do not know everything, that I am human and not perfect."
and more videos have been circulating on social media of men who were not called up to the Torah at age 13, and now, because of the war and their confrontation with evil, they want to reconnect to their roots. Their friends are organizing bar mitzvah celebrations for them, complete with the throwing of candies and a festive meal.
Much excitement has surrounded Emunah Cohen and Neta Lax, the two fresh winners of the annual International Bible Quiz. Yesterday I interviewed them and heard their story.
It turns out that they studied long hours together and were confident they would be the leading competitors. "We planned on winning together," Emunah revealed. "We thought both of us would answer every question correctly so that we would both be champions, tied for first place.
It seems that for most of today’s news providers, nothing short of a rowdy demonstration, a fight on Twitter, or a sharp exchange in the Knesset is considered newsworthy. Yet, I am seeing, daily, so many events demonstrating unity throughout the Jewish world! Here is a short roundup from the week or so:
It turns out that they studied long hours together and were confident they would be the leading competitors. "We planned on winning together," Emunah revealed. "We thought both of us would answer every question correctly so that we would both be champions, tied for first place.
But in the end Emunah won. "They made a big deal about our big hug after I lost," Neta said. "But it was the easiest thing to share in her happiness. Besides, we were just relieved that the competition was finally over."
"The more you learn," Neta said, "the easier it gets. When you learn a lot of Tanach (Bible) you simply see how everything connects to your life. I truly felt that what I learned accompanied me wherever I went. It made my heart feel good."
"The more you learn," Neta said, "the easier it gets. When you learn a lot of Tanach (Bible) you simply see how everything connects to your life. I truly felt that what I learned accompanied me wherever I went. It made my heart feel good."
In closing, Neta declared: "The two of us will continue to study the Tanach. There were parts of the Tanach that were not in the material covered by the quiz, and it's important for us to learn them too."
In closing, Neta declared: "The two of us will continue to study the Tanach. There were parts of the Tanach that were not in the material covered by the quiz, and it's important for us to learn them too."
And Emunah had this recommendation: "Study the Bible for 5 minutes every day. Not for school, not for the Bible quiz, but just for how much fun it will be."
• Massive prayer gatherings are taking place almost every day. A family will inaugurate a new sefer Torah in memory of a war hero, and the entire city will celebrate together with them. This past week, popular Israeli singer Yishai Lapidot initiated a hachnasat sefer Torah in Petah Tikva in memory of Miron Gersh, an only child, who fell in battle in Gaza. Hundreds of people from all sectors of society came to dance with the Torah and with Miron’s parents.
And Emunah had this recommendation: "Study the Bible for 5 minutes every day. Not for school, not for the Bible quiz, but just for how much fun it will be."
• Many memorable events have been hosted
But in the end Emunah won. "They made a big deal about our big hug after I lost," Neta said. "But it was the easiest thing to share in her happiness. Besides, we were just relieved that the competition was finally over."
In the course of the entire contest, Emunah made only one error. "I knew the answer to the question: 'When did King David cry for
In the course of the entire contest, Emunah made only one error. "I knew the answer to the question: 'When did King David cry for
• Yet another emotional brit milah ceremony was held last week in the Ukraine for two Jewish men, aged 70 and 30. Apparently over 1,000 Jews in the Ukraine and Russia have recently become aroused to embrace their Jewish heritage, and have accordingly undergone a brit milah as adults (because their parents felt it was too risky during the Communist era). It just goes to show you: It’s never too late!
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• In a similar spirit, many reservists here in Israel have decided to celebrate their bar mitzvahs. More
Sivan Rahav-Meir is a media personality and lecturer. Married to Yedidya, the mother of five. Lives in Jerusalem, and formerly served as the World Mizrachi Shlicha to North Amer ica. Sivan lectures in Israel and overseas about the media, Judaism, Zionism and new media. She was voted by Globes newspaper as most popular female media personality in Israel and by the Jerusalem Post as one of the 50 most influential Jews in the world.
Sivan Rahav-Meir is a media personality and lecturer. Married to Yedidya, the mother of five. Lives in Jerusalem, and formerly served as the World Mizrachi Shlicha to North Amer ica. Sivan lectures in Israel and overseas about the media, Judaism, Zionism and new media. She was voted by Globes newspaper as most popular female media personality in Israel and by the Jerusalem Post as one of the 50 most influential Jews in the world.
by the shul in Kibbutz Be’eri, the symbol of the October 7 massacre. Last week, Avida Bachar, head of the kibbutz’s agriculture department, spoke at a memorial service for his friend, Yossi Sharabi, whose body is still being held in Gaza. Avida, who lost his wife and son on Simchat Torah, gave a moving eulogy, which went viral, calling on people to put their families before their careers.
• Far from Be’eri, another video was filmed, showing Rabbi Daniel Alter of the Pnei Menachem community crying at the graves of the tzaddikim in Europe and pleading for the return of the hostages. So many Israelis watched this Hasidic rabbi crying and cried along with him.
• A great deal has been written about the trauma experienced by the survivors of the Nova festival and of the importance of providing them with the support they need. But what you may not have read is that hundreds of survivors have been participating in Shabbat and Yom Tov celebrations arranged by the Kesher Yehudi organization. They call their community, “From Nova to Jerusalem” and many young people have been joining them as part of their rehabilitation process. Having spent several Shabbatot with them, I can say that they are creating a new language of rebirth and renewal.
• You can get a sense that something special is happening among today’s youth from the posts of Yagel Yaakov, the boy from Kibbutz Nir Or who was released from captivity in Gaza. Yagel announced that he is keeping Shabbat and will no longer be available on social media on this holy day. He posted a video of himself writing a letter in a Torah scroll and also said that
he has begun to wear tzitzit. In his latest video, he exclaims: “You don’t have to be dati to be Jewish!”
The individuals involved in the above stories don’t have spokespeople, nor do they represent any organizations; it is simply the situation on the ground. How ridiculous to present Judaism as a divisive force, rather than the precious thread binding us together.
Sivan Rahav-Meir is a media personality and lecturer. Married to Yedidya, the mother of five. Lives in Jerusalem, and formerly served as the World Mizrachi Shlicha to North America. Sivan lectures in Israel and overseas about the media, Judaism, Zionism and new media. She was voted by Globes newspaper as most popular female media personality in Israel and by the Jerusalem Post as one of the 50 most influential Jews in the world.
TORAH 4 TEENS
BY
TEENS
NCSY ISRAEL
EMILY STEMP
SENIOR PROGRAM DIRECTOR, CHAI GIRLS SUMMER DIRECTOR
THE COLORS OF COMPLEXITY
In Parshat Vayeishev, Yaakov presents Yosef, his favorite son and “ben zekunim”, with a special cloak called a ketonet passim. Rashi quotes the midrash in Bereishit Rabbah to explain that the term “Passim” is an acronym signifying Yosef’s future troubles, specifically that he would work for Potiphar and be sold between Socharim (merchants), Ishmaelim and Midianim.
This Midrashic depiction of the ketonet passim runs counter to the “technicolor dream coat” we may imagine. Was Yosef’s cloak a symbol of Yaakov’s love for his favorite son, or a somber allusion to the suffering that Yosef was destined to endure?
The Midrashic understanding of the ketonet passim need not contradict our positive perception of the robe; rather, the uniqueness of the ketonet lies in its dualism. The cloak can be viewed as both a token of Yaakov’s profound emotional attachment to Yosef and as a symbol of the strength and support that Yosef would need when facing the challenges that awaited him.
If Yosef’s brothers had understood this deeper meaning of the ketonet passim, and that Yosef’s ketonet was also a necessary tool for him to withstand the imminent
challenges, perhaps they would have been able to curb their envy.
We must always remind ourselves that even when others seem to possess attributes or assets that we lack, jealousy is not a logical or effective method to improve our situation. Each gift comes with an array of challenges that, sometimes, may be the very reason for the gift. We must recognize that Hashem bestows gifts upon each of us that are laden with meaning and exactly suited for our individual needs. Instead of coveting the gifts of others, let us strive to understand and use our own God-given talents and qualities while valuing the experiences that allow us to develop and shape them.
DANIELLA WEISS 10TH GRADE, KIRYAT YE’ARIM
HOLD ONTO YOUR DREAMS
We have all heard the classic story of Yosef’s dreams. If you haven’t, I’m going to tell you a little about them. Dream 1: The sun (Yaakov), moon (Rachel), and stars (his brothers) all bow down to him. Dream 2: 11 small bundles of wheat (the brothers) bow down to one bigger one in the middle (Yosef). These dreams symbolize Yosef’s future greatness. These dreams intensified the brothers’ jealousy even more, leading them to sell Yosef as a slave. So, if Yosef’s brothers were so judgmental, why tell them
about the dreams in the first place? Yosef told them about the dreams because it shows the unwavering power of believing his dreams would come true even when his brothers were in doubt. Yosef’s willingness to dream big reflects a lesson for all of us. In my perspective, I think we can learn to embrace the unique potential G-d has given us all. Even when others are in doubt, we must stay true to our purpose. Yosef’s story also shows that we need to have sensitivity in how we communicate our goals or dreams because Yosef’s brothers misinterpreted his dreams as arrogance. In my opinion, I think this is because they felt threatened by his leadership in the future, but Yosef was just sharing his dreams out of excitement. This teaches us that we should be sensitive when sharing things with others.
From another perspective, Yosef’s dreams were not just his own aspirations. Little did he know they were a reflection of Hashem’s plan and the Jewish people’s as well. By being sold, working in Potiphar’s house, and even being thrown in jail, it all led up to him becoming a king in Egypt and helping his family during the famine and laying down the groundwork for the eventual formation of Bnei Yisrael. Even when the journey was hard, he never gave up hope. He always believed Hashem had a plan, even in the darkest times. In conclusion, I have learned from this that you should hold onto your dreams—you never know what will come true—and stay committed to pursuing them. Be sensitive with how you phrase your conversations and, of course, believe in Hashem. This would definitely not have happened if he didn’t have emunah. Thank you so much for reading, and have an amazing Shabbat!
I GO TO WORK, JUST LIKE YOU .
At Jus by Julie, I manage UberEats orders. Each order I pack is a small triumph, a step towards independence.
When I’m not working, I cherish moments with friends, especially at Yachad. It’s more than a community; it’s a family that values every individual.
