Coast Weekend November 2, 2017 by Our Coast

Every Thursday Nov. 2, 2017 • coastweekend.com

CANNON BEACH S STORMY WEATHER ARTS FESTIVAL NOV. 3-5 ¦ STORY ON PAGE 10

ALSO INSIDE

THE FINALE OF ‘BEWARE THE BANDAGE MAN’

2 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

Art of the Reformation explored at Peace Lutheran Church

COURTESY HOFFMAN CENTER

“Yellow Poppy” by Zoe Swain

‘Strange Fauna’ opens at Hoffman gallery MANZANITA — The art of Zoe Swain and Dmitri Swain will be showcased at the Hoffman Center for the Arts Gallery in “Strange Fauna,” an exhibit that opens 3 to 5 p.m. Friday, Nov. 3, and continues every Friday and Saturday 3 to

5 p.m. through Saturday, Nov. 25. Zoe’s abstract minimalist flower paintings and Dmitri’s narrative sculptural ceramics will be available for purchase. The Swains have created a body of visual and sculp-

tural pieces that draw upon and explore man’s relationship to nature. Mysterious, engaging and modern, they have developed a body of intriguing works. For more information, contact hoffmancenterartgallery@gmail.com.

Piano, photography unite at Stormy Weather CANNON BEACH — During the 30th anniversary of the Stormy Weather Arts Festival, at 5 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, Cannon Beach Community Church will host an event titled “The Four Elements: Water-Wind-Fire-Earth,” a collaborative piano and photography concert, fea-

turing jazz pianist David Robinson and Thomas Robinson’s nature photography projected upon a big screen. This event is a benefit for Cannon Beach Food Pantry (also sponsored by the Community Church). Please bring a donation of canned food or a cash

donation to support the food pantry. This event is open to public and is part of the Fall Steinway Grand Piano Concert Series, celebrating the new Steinway Grand Piano, Model B, Community Church purchased in summer 2017.

ASTORIA — The ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America) Oregon Synod Columbia Coast Cluster invites the community to consider the impact of the arts in its commemoration of the 500th anniversary of the Protestant Reformation on Saturday, Nov. 4, at Peace Lutheran Church (565 12th St.). A festive worship service will be held with Bishop David Brauer-Riecke at 2 p.m. followed by breakout sessions on the music and art of the Reformation. Vincent Jones-Centeno, music director of Cascadia Concert Opera and organist at Grace Episcopal in Astoria, will lead a session on music and the Reformation. Kristen Shauck, art instructor at Clatsop Community College, will focus on the use of visual media in the Reformation. The day concludes with a festive dinner at 5 p.m. in the Fellowship Hall. The dinner is a $10 charge per individual; $25 for a family of three.

COURTESY STEPHAN KIENBERGER

A portrait of Martin Luther by Lucas Cranach the Elder

Luther’s image

Printing and the arts

The beginning of the Reformation is attributed to Martin Luther and his posting of 95 Theses on the door of the Castle Church in the university town of Wittenberg, Germany. According to tradition, it was on the Eve of All Saints, Oct. 31, 1517, that Luther posted these “talking points” to initiate a discussion on certain reforms within the Roman Catholic Church. Five centuries later, Protestant churches throughout the world will commemorate this event that initiated the

far from Wittenberg. These articles were often illustrated with pictures and woodcuts. People who could not read the theological writings could “read” the images and illustrations that, for example, the workshop of the Cranach family produced in endless quantity. The relationship between Luther and the Cranach family helped spread of the Reformation. Lucas Cranach the Elder was the court painter to the Electors of Saxony and a resident of Wittenberg. What Luther did through his theological writings, Cranach did through his workshop; through paintings, woodcuts and engravings.

COURTESY STEPHAN KIENBERGER

A portrait of Martin Luther by Lucas Cranach the Elder

global church movement known as Protestantism. Printing and the arts are essential elements of the Reformation. In fact, the Reformation could be seen as a byproduct of Johannes Gutenbergs’s invention of letterpress printing. The dawn of a new media age ensued through the mass printing and distribution of fliers and brochures that reached populations

Luther embraced music and the arts. In fact, Luther used any media that could advance what he felt was the central call of the Gospel message, namely, that we are made right with God and one another through God’s gracious love in Jesus Christ. Therefore, just as Luther did not wince from employing visual depictions to advance his message, he also embraced music and singing, as he knew these forms could reach people in many ways. These elements — the printing press and influential artists like Cranach — made Luther a media star in his day. Depictions of Luther became the most popular and widely distributed images of the 15th century. This is an amazing precedent considering that Luther was not a member of the nobility, but a lowly albeit educated monk.

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 3

Head Northwest By Northwest during arts festival CANNON BEACH — Northwest By Northwest Gallery (232 N. Spruce St. in Cannon Beach) celebrates its 30th year with the Stormy Weather Arts Festival.

Schedule

Friday, Nov. 3 • 5 to 6 p.m. Foundry process with renowned public sculptor and bronze artist Georgia Gerber. Unveiling of “Sea Hawk” sculpture. • 6 to 8 p.m. Live music with Bobcat Bob and Sineann Winery. Saturday, Nov. 4 • 11 a.m. Hazel Schlesinger, Public Choice winner for Plein Air & More Arts Festival. Her paintings can be seen around the world, in TV series, movies

coast

and commercials. 1 p.m. Master of ﬁne art ﬁlm photography Christopher Burkett gives a talk on “how we see color.” He will share three new images during the festival. 2 p.m. Narrative sculpture of Ann Fleming in bronze tell the stories of our lives. “Midori” is a public sculpture by the artist. 3 p.m. Gerber talks about the process of sculpting “Sea Hawk” and the creative process. 4 p.m. Ivan McLean, a contemporary sculptor. Projects include Nike, Nines Hotel PDX, World Trade Center in Long Beach California and our Landmark Sculpture Garden. 6 to 8 p.m. Reception with artists and live music of Bobcat Bob and Sineann Winery.

weekend INSIDE THIS ISSUE

arts & entertainment ON THE COVER

COAST WEEKEND EDITOR ERICK BENGEL CALENDAR COORDINATOR REBECCA HERREN CONTRIBUTORS RYAN HUME DYLAN TANNER BRENNA VISSER

Husband-and-wife glassblowing team Suzanne Kindland and Jim Kingwell create a ‘nature-inspired’ vase at Icefire Glassworks during the 2013 Stormy Weather Arts Festival. ERICK BENGEL PHOTO

See story on Page 10

4 10 14

THE ARTS

‘Beware the Bandage Man: Part II’ A North Coast horror story

FEATURE

Stormy Weather Arts Festival Event commemorates 30th anniversary

DINING

Mouth of the Columbia

Dundee’s fare neither star nor benchwarmer

FURTHER ENJOYMENT MUSIC CALENDAR.....................5 SEE + DO ........................... 12, 13 CROSSWORD ........................... 17 CW MARKETPLACE ......... 18, 19

Find it all online!

CoastWeekend.com features full calendar listings, keyword search and easy sharing on social media.

New items for publication consideration must be submitted by 10 a.m. Tuesday, one week and two days before publication.

TO SUBMIT AN ITEM

Phone: 503.325.3211 Ext. 217 or 800.781.3211 Fax: 503.325.6573 E-mail: editor@coastweekend.com Address: P.O.Box 210 • 949 Exchange St. Astoria, OR 97103 Coast Weekend is published every Thursday by the EO Media Group, all rights reserved. No part of this publication can be reproduced without consent of the publisher. Coast Weekend appears weekly in The Daily Astorian and the Chinook Observer.

Georgia Gerber’s bronze sculpure of a “Sea Hawk” will be unveiled at Northwest By Northwest Gallery during the Stormy Weather Arts Festival.

COURTESY NORTHWEST BY NORTHWEST GALLERY

4 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

BEWARE THE BANDAGE MAN: A NORTH COAST HORROR STORY PART II Story by RYAN HUME Illustrations by DYLAN TANNER FOR COAST WEEKEND

t was Saturday, October 20, 1973. Ben Driscoll woke up that morning with a pinch. He had slept hard, drooling on his pillow and flinging one arm off the side of the bed. When he shot awake he found a Dungeness crab clamping the pink meat of his wrist. “What the hell?” he said, shaking the crustacean loose. He collected 11 free-range crabs from around the cottage and put them into the kitchen sink as the kids slept. Sultan was nowhere to be found. The skulls were gone, too. The front door had blown wide open during the night, but this kind of thing didn’t just happen. There was only one man who could be responsible for this. Ben knocked on Earl Sloane’s door, seething, a Dungeness in hand. After a few long minutes, Earl opened the door, still crutched against the shotgun. “Pete,” he said. “Wasn’t sure if I would see you again.” Earl looked at the crab in his hand. “Gift?” “What is this?” Ben said, raising the crab. “Do you think this is funny?” “No,” Earl said plainly. “I think that is delicious.” “Look, I don’t know what you’re playing at, old man,” Ben said. “But leave me and my family alone. And where’s my dog?” “Haven’t seen him.” “If I hear one bark from this direction … ” Ben wagged a shaky finger at Earl’s chest. “One bark, and I’ll—” Earl’s face drained of any friendly pretense until it set in a hard scowl. “You’ll what?” “Just wait,” Ben said, backing up on the porch. He chucked the crab at the doormat. “Just wait.” As Ben began to walk away, Earl called from the door, “Pete! I tried to level with you!” “Oh yeah,” Ben said without turning around. “Your dead son. Right!” “He’s always looking for a ride home!” When he returned to the Surf’s End

House, the kids were awake. “When did you get home last night?” he asked Audrey. “What’s with the crabs?” she replied. “Tonight we eat like kings.” “I’m going out tonight,” she said. “Suzy A. might be in love.” “Where’s Sultan?” Sam asked. ••• What kind of cruel world would take a boy’s mother and dog in the same year? Ben asked the cloudy sky, but received no answer. He was beginning to lose Audrey, too, but fathers spend years preparing to lose their 16-year-old daughters. They combed the neighborhood, but the mutt never turned up. Night

came early as the rains blotted the sun and stirred a heavy wind that rattled every branch, bush and beam. The squalls didn’t stop Audrey from going out when a cherry-red Chevy pickup emerged out front. Sam stared at the crab on his plate, his one good eye rubbed raw by tissues. He had barely even given its claw a handshake. Ben couldn’t be sure the crab he was eating was the one that had bit him this morning, but he took a satisfaction in imagining that it was every time he snapped shell to reveal a lump of sweet meat. Wouldn’t life be easier if you could douse all of your enemies in melted butter? “It’s so cold out there,” Sam said. “I bet he’s really scared.” “You need to eat, buddy,” Ben said. “Keep your strength up. We’ll find him

in the morning.” But thinking about those posters they had seen downtown, Ben wasn’t so sure. After he cleaned up the kitchen, set the rest of the crabs to the wild, and got Sam to bed in flannel pajamas, Ben poured four fingers of bourbon and plotted at a ghostly face built of three dark knobs glazed into the knotty pine. He was one hundred percent Earl Sloane had his hands on this. He has another key — it’s that simple. Ben’s grip tightened around his glass as he imagined that old kook limping down this dark hallway as he snored, as his son, as his daughter … No, don’t even go there. Stay focused. Perhaps he could return the favor? He could just peek in through one of Sloane’s windows. Once he saw Sultan in the house, he could … do what exactly? He’d squeezed himself into a position where he couldn’t call the police. What would he do next? Rain spat against the windows. The downpour gushed enough to dim the orange throb of light that winked across the sky and also hid the bulky shadow that appeared outside the window. When it spanked the double pane with its bandaged palm, bourbon snuck through Ben’s nose as he let the glass slip, shattering on the floor. He knocked over his chair as he stood. The creature rubbed its palm across the glass, staining the window with its dark grease as its breath birthed little cumulus clouds. It was breathing. For a moment, Ben caught his own reflection in the window, his face transposed upon the near-featureless gauze of the creature’s bandaged head. Then they both looked to the front door. “Sam!” Ben yelled. He ran across the room and made it to the lock. “Sam! Get up now!” He flipped the table over and buttressed it against the door just as the knob began to spasm and the soggy smacks of the creature’s fists shook the wood in its frame. Continued on Page 22

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 5

IN THE COLUMBIA-PACIFIC REGION Thursday, Nov. 2 Sugar Thistle 5 p.m., The Bistro, 263 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2661. Sugar Thistle plays Americana and original tunes. Maggie & the Kats 6 p.m., Public Coast Brewing Co., 264 Third St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-0285, no cover. Maggie & the Kats play indie blues and alternative soul Basin Street NW 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Dave Drury on guitar, Todd Pederson on bass and friends perform mainstream jazz classics. Julie Amici Trio 6:30 p.m., Bread & Ocean, 154 Laneda Ave., Manzanita, 503-368-5823. The Julie Amici Trio is a union of jazz, blues and country, adding a fresh take to a bygone era.

bluegrass music from the 70s and 80s, and original tunes. Wes Wahrmund 6 p.m., The Bistro, 263 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2661. Wes Wahrmund’s classical guitar skills amaze with light jazz and original tunes. Jennifer Goodenberger 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Jennifer Goodenberger plays new age, folk and original music in styles from classical and contemporary to improvisational and contemplative piano. Maggie & the Kats 6:30 p.m., Sweet Basil’s Café, 271 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1539, no cover, 21+. Maggie & the Kats play New Orleans gumbo blues, soul and rhythm-n-blues.

Senior Center Jam 6:30 p.m., Astoria Senior Center, 1111 Exchange St., Astoria, 503-468-0390. The Astoria Senior Center offers string band, bluegrass and country.

Eric John Kaiser 7 p.m., McMenamins Sand Trap, 1157 Marion Ave., Gearhart, 503-717-8150, no cover. French troubadour Eric Kaiser crosses musical cultures between traditional French stylings and American rhythm; includes rock, hip-hop, roadhouse blues and reggae.

Champagne Sunday 7 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Champagne Sunday fires off gypsy-punk rock and raucous folk songs alongside intimate tear-jerkers and anthemic foot-stompers.

RJ Marx Quartet 7 p.m., WineKraft, 80 10th St., Astoria, 503-468-0206, no cover, 21+. Saxophonist RJ Marx leads the quartet in a repertoire of jazz music with John Orr (guitar), Joe Church (bass) and Dave Gager (drums).

Floating Glass Balls 8 p.m., Bill’s Tavern, 188 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2202, no cover. The Floating Glass Balls plays bluegrass, Caribbean, folk, swing and country.

Champagne Sunday 9 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Champagne Sunday fires off gypsy-punk rock and raucous folk songs alongside intimate tear-jerkers and anthemic foot-stompers.

Friday, Nov. 3 Two Crows Joy 5 p.m., Clatsop County Fairgrounds, 92937 Walluski Loop, Astoria, $10. Two Crows Joy plays rock, country, pop, Celtic and indie Americana. Thistle & Rose 6 p.m., Seasons Café, 255 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1159. Thistle and Rose play folk, Americana and

Saturday, Nov. 4 Adams & Costello 11 a.m., Sandpiper Square, 170 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach. Julie Adams and Michael Costello play a visceral blend of original music and soulful covers.

Bruce Smith 11 a.m., Coaster Theatre Square, 108 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach. Bruce Smith will play acoustic guitar during the Stormy Weather Arts Festival. Peter Ali 1 p.m., Manzanita Branch Library, 571 Laneda Ave., Manzanita, 503-368-6665, no cover. Peter Ali plays Native American flute music. Two Crows Joy 1 p.m., Ecola Square, 123 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach. Two Crows Joy plays rock, country, pop, Celtic and indie Americana. Piano Concert 5 p.m., Cannon Beach Community Church, 132 Washington St., Cannon Beach, $10. “Water-Wind-Fire-Earth: Piano Meditations & Nature Photography” featuring jazz pianist David Robinson and photographer Thomas Robinson. George Coleman 6 p.m., Shelburne Inn Restaurant, 4415 Pacific Way, Seaview, Wash., 360-6424150, no cover. George Coleman offers a repertoire mix of old familiar favorites and classical selections on his 12-string guitar.

Ta Ta Ta 7 p.m., WineKraft, 80 10th St., Astoria, 503-468-0206, no cover, 21+. Ta Ta Ta plays classical music. The Dandy Warhols 7:30 p.m., Columbia Theatre, 1231 Vandercook Way, Longview, Wash., 360-575-8499, $28 to $35. The Dandy Warhols play rock, alternative rock, psychedelic, power pop and garage rock. Ora Cogan 8 p.m., Sou’Wester Lodge, 3728 J Place, Seaview, Wash., 360-642-2542, no cover. Multi-instrumentalist Ora Cogan combines folk compositions with psychedelia, chamber pop and rock. Spotlight Concert 8 p.m., Coaster Theatre, 108 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2623, $30. The Seattle Americana band Heels to the Hardwood brings its foot-stomping sound to the Stormy Weather Arts Festival.

MORE MUSIC coastweekend.com/ cw/music

Strange Hotel 9 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Strange Hotel is a four-member rock band influenced by soul, jazz, rhythm-n-blues and fusion music.

Sunday, Nov. 5 Brews & Blues 11 a.m., Cannon Beach Community Hall, 207 Spruce St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2623, $25. Sample local craft beers to live Delta blues music with Steve Cheseborough. John Orr 11:30 a.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Guitarist John Orr plays southern blues, jazz and folk music featuring Peter Hinsbeek.

Continued on Page 17

Wes Wahrmund 6 p.m., The Bistro, 263 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2661. Wes Wahrmund’s classical guitar skills amaze with light jazz and original tunes. David Drury 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Guitarist David Drury plays contemporary, classic and traditional jazz standards. Alastair Greene Band 7 p.m., The Birk, 11139 Hwy. 202, Birkenfeld, 503-755-2722, $15. Alastair Greene is known for his blues-based, soulful and melodic guitar playing ranging from blues to southern rock. Groovy Wallpaper 7 p.m., Peninsula Arts Center, 504 Pacific Ave., Long Beach, Wash., 360901-0962, $15. Groovy Wallpaper plays psychedelic, electronic and acoustic trance loops.

KELLY MOONEY PHOTO

The Lisa Tyack Trio

Sunday, Nov. 5 Lisa Tyack Trio 3 p.m., Birkenfeld Theatre, 75 Nehalem St., Clatskanie, 503-728-3403, $10 to $15. The Lisa Tyack band plays rhythm-n-blues, rock, swing, ballads, musical theater selections and jazzy standards.

music first

6 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

Guidi, Buehler team up for Liberty recital ASTORIA — The Clatsop Community College Foundation presents “35 and You,” featuring baritone Deac Guidi and piano accompanist Susan Buehler, 2:30 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 5, at the Liberty Theatre (1203 Commercial St.). The event is free but donations to the Clatsop Community College Foundation are welcome. The show offers an afternoon recital of 35 songs by composers that include Ravel, Copland, Poulenc, Freiberger, Quilter and Lynn. Guidi is a teacher and FILE PHOTO Deac Guidi, performer living on the an Astoria North Coast. Recent perforresident and mances include, at Portland baritone Opera, Haly in L’Italiana in “Algeri” and Benoit in “LaBoheme,” and Dr. Bartolo in “Il Barbiere di Siviglia” with the Astoria Music Festival. Buehler is professor emeritus from Baker University in Baldwin City, Kansas, where she was a member of the voice faculty for 25 years. A Cannon Beach resident, Buehler maintains Music Lasts A Lifetime voice and

COURTESY BILL SVENDSEN

Skip VonKuske ERICK BENGEL PHOTO

Susan Buehler, a piano and voice teacher living in Cannon Beach, tickles the ivories of her baby grand in her home studio.

piano studio where she teaches students of all ages. She is the pianist for the Cannon Beach Chorus and organist at Calvary Episcopal Church in Seaside and Cannon Beach Community Church. For more information, call 503-338-2306.

Sou’wester welcomes folk musician Ora Cogan SEAVIEW, WASH. — Ora Cogan, a multi-instrumental folk musician from Vancouver, Washington, plays the Sou’wester Lodge 8 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4. The event is free and open to the public. Cogan combines the intricate guitar picking of Americana with Psychedelic dreamscapes, drawing comparisons to 1970s folk legend Karen Dalton. She has shared the stage with the likes of Grouper and Hope Sandoval while touring extensively in North America, Europe and the UK. Cogan became a part of Vancouver’s eclectic music scene as a teen. Her new offering, “Crickets,” comes out November 2017. The

Groovy Wallpaper performs at Peninsula Arts Center

STASIA GARRAWAY PHOTO

Ora Cogan

album inhabits a place between psychedelic folk, dark

wave ambient and experimental dream pop.

LONG BEACH, WASH. — Groovy Wallpaper, a duo of amazing multi-instrumentalists, will play 7 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, at the Peninsula Arts Center in Long Beach, Washington. Doors open at 6:30 p.m. Groovy Wallpaper is Skip VonKuske (Portland Cello Project, Vagabond Opera, Cellotronik) and Don Henson (Sneakin Out, The Adequates, The Druthers, Kathryn Claire). VonKuske is Portland’s foremost cellist, and Henson is known for his Rube Goldberg-like percussion set-up and performance. To call them a cello and percussion duo would not do them justice. Oregon Arts Watch recently referred to VonKuske as “one of Oregon’s finest and most adventurous musicians.”A co-founder of the Portland Cello Project, a genre-defying ensemble, VonKuske continues to perform and collaborate with other artists. His solo project is “cellotronik,” in which he incorporates a rich array of cello, guitar, mandolin, vocals, software instruments and live looping. The result is a unique blend of classical virtuosity, rock’n’roll heart and folksy charm wrapped in a cloak of inspired originals, improvisations and unexpected cover songs. Henson — in addition to a set of percussion instruments that has to be seen to be believed — is also known for his proficiency on keyboards, glockenspiel, vibraphone and synthesizer. He has played various stages with Pink Martini, “The Tonight Show (With Jay Leno)” and has also opened for k.d. lang and played Carnegie Hall with his own band. The Peninsula Arts Center (peninsu-

COURTESY BILL SVENDSEN

Don Henson

laartscenter.org) is located at 504 Pacific Ave. N., Long Beach, Washington. Tickets are $15 and are available on Brown Paper Tickets, by emailing events@ peninsulaartscenter.org, or by calling 360901-0962. Wine, beer and other refreshments are available for purchase.

Open mic

The arts center holds an open mic the Friday night before each concert. Sign-ups start around 6:30 p.m.; the music begins at 7 p.m. Singers, instrumentalists, poets, spoken-word artists, stand-up comedians and dramatists are all welcome. Or, just come to listen, and be amazed by the breadth of talent in the region.

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 7

Run for the ‘Money’ in Tillamook TILLAMOOK — Tickets are on sale for the Tillamook Association for the Performing Arts latest production, “Money Matters,” at TAPA’s Barn Community Playhouse. The play runs Nov. 3 through 19. The comedic farce will show at 7 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays (Nov. 3, 4, 10, 11, 17 and 18); and 2 p.m. Sundays (Nov. 12 and 19). Doors open 30 minutes prior to curtain. The Association will hold an opening night gala celebration Friday, Nov. 3, where every ticket purchased includes complimentary hors d’oeuvres and a beverage of choice. Written by Michael Parker and Susan Parker, and directed by Rikki Reid, “Money Matters” tells the story of the late Mr. Hammond, who spent 20 years printing $20 bills on a printing press he built in the basement of Monet Manor. After his death 10 years ago, his faithful retainer George and daughter Annie continued the family business for Mr. Hammond’s widow, who recently passed away. Contrary to her promise to leave the manor and all her assets to George and Annie, she has bequeathed the manor

TILLAMOOKTHEATER.COM

The “Money Matters” cast (from left): Al Johnson, Carly Persons, Mallary Josi, Rodney Dahl, Ann Harper and David Mattison

COURTESY TAPA

to a stranger, Mr. Bud Davis, who is emphatic about turning it into a retirement home for

ladies. Determined to keep the manor, Annie invites an old friend and sorority sister,

Charmaine Beauregard, to play a ghost so as to help convince Bud that the manor is unsuitable for a retirement home because it is haunted. The playhouse is located at 1204 Ivy St., one block west of U.S. Highway 101. Reserved seating is recommended through Diamond Art Jewelers (307 Main St.), or call 503-842-7940. Tickets are $15 per person. For more information, visit tillamooktheater.com.

‘Vintage Hitchcock’ radio play presents director’s early tales NEHALEM — Experience Alfred Hitchcock, the master of suspense, with “Vintage Hitchcock: A Live Radio Play,” three tales featuring spies, murder and love. The Riverbend Players present a radio play adaptation by Joe Landry of three early Hitchcock films 7 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4; 7 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 11; 7 p.m. Friday, Nov. 17; 7 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 18; and Sunday matinees at 2 p.m. Nov. 5, 12 and 19. The show takes place at the North County Recreation District Performing Arts Center (36155 Ninth St., Nehalem). In “The Lodger,” a landlady suspects her mysterious new tenant may be an ominous serial killer. An international spy

Baked Bingo, open mic comedy at Merry Time ASTORIA — At 7 p.m. the next two Tuesdays — Nov. 7 and 14 — the Merry Time Bar & Grill will hold “Baked Bingo,” followed by “Open Mic/Insert Foot” (open mic comedy). Baked Bingo is where establishment owner Terry Robinett bakes a homemade cake or other sweet treat and every bingo winner gets a slice along with a fun prize or two. Recent prizes have included wigs, ceramic collectibles,

FACEBOOK.COM

plastic severed hands and a giant oven mitt shaped like Spock’s hand giving a

Vulcan salute. Baked Bingo also incorporates “wild card” opportunities for players to cover a spot of his or her choice if willing and able to play along with requests from the host. (A recent game host, for example, called for players to sing a few verses from any Madonna song while standing on one foot.) It gets interesting — and it’s free to play! Charming hosts vary and have recently includ-

ed Robinett, Gingervitus, Mandi Anderson and Mark Barsekian. Immediately following bingo, grab your five minutes of fame and take the stage in this newly formed open mic comedy night called “Open Mic/Insert Foot,” hosted by local bartender Pete Birdeno. Sign-ups start at 8 p.m. All experience levels are welcome. All events are for people 21 and older.

Alfred Hitchcock

ring plots a massive explosion with tragic results in “Sabotage.” And in “The 39 Steps,” a man falsely accused of murder races across Scotland while handcuffed to a beautiful woman to recover stolen government documents. These stories come to life in the style of a 1947 radio broadcast, complete with intriguing characters, on-stage sound effects and live jingle singers. Perfect for heading into the dark and stormy times of winter, this production is directed by Brian McMahon, with assistant director Tom Mock and producer Tom Cocklin. Tickets are $15. Perhaps them at tickettomato.com or at the door. Children 12 and younger are admitted free.

8 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

Vendors, crafters wanted to help ‘Deck the Hall’ SKAMOKAWA, WASH. — The Friends of Skamokawa is seeking vendors and crafters to participate in the group’s annual holiday open house, “Deck the Hall.” Looking to sell your unique art or craft? Whether you are new to selling or have years of experience, we would love to have you at this fun community event. We offer a warm, friendly holiday shopping environment for everyone to enjoy.

Submit vendor items no later than 3 p.m. Monday, Nov. 20. The open house takes place Friday, Nov. 24, through Sunday, Dec. 17, at the Friends of Skamokawa’s River Life Interpretive Center (aka Central School and Redmen Hall) at 1394 Washington State Route 4, Skamokawa, Washington. For more information, or to sign up, call 360-7953007 or email fos1894@ gmail.com.

At Astoria Public Library, Oregon Humanities goes ‘Beyond Fake News’

Astoria Yacht Club talks marine diesel engines ASTORIA — At 6:30 p.m., Thursday, Nov. 2, the Astoria Yacht Club will host Mark Woolsey of Coast Diesel as part of its 2017-18 educational program. Woolsey will discuss the maintenance, troubleshooting and selection of small marine diesel engines. The talk will be held in the Yacht Club room

upstairs in the Chinook Building (300 Industry St.) at the West Mooring Basin and will last one to two hours. There will be no charge, but donations toward facility expenses will be accepted. Though the presentation will be primarily oriented toward pleasure craft, it will be open to the public.

COLIN MURPHEY PHOTO

A sailor with the Astoria Yacht Club adjusts the main sail on his boat during a leisurely outing on the Columbia River.

COURTESY ASTORIA PUBLIC LIBRARY

Kelly McElroy, an outreach librarian at Oregon State University

ASTORIA — Oregonians have seen how the news can both represent and misrepresent facts. From debate over the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge to the discourse around “alternative facts,” it can seem difficult to find current and accurate information as we make decisions in our communities. This is the focus of “Beyond Fake News: How We Find Accurate Information about the World,” a free conversation with Kelly McElroy 3 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, at the Astoria Public Library (450 10th St.). This program is sponsored by Oregon Humanities. McElroy is an outreach librarian at Oregon State University. She coedited the Critical Library Pedagogy Handbooks and is interested in engaging communities in thoughtful inquiry about the in-

formation they need for school, work and play. Through the Conversation Project, Oregon Humanities offers free programs that engage community members in thoughtful, challenging conversations about ideas critical to our daily lives and our state’s future. For more information about this free community discussion, contact Senior Library Assistant Ami Kreider at 503-325-7323 or akreider@astoria.or.us. Oregon Humanities — an independent nonprofit affiliate of the National Endowment for the Humanities and a partner of the Oregon Cultural Trust — connects Oregonians to ideas that change lives and transform communities. More information about Oregon Humanities’ programs and publications can be found at oregonhumanities.org.

Ales & Ideas presents ‘Imperiled: Church/State Separation in America’ ASTORIA — Clatsop Community College’s next Ales & Ideas lecture, titled “Imperiled: Church/State Separation in America,” takes place 7 p.m. Thursday, Nov. 2, at the Fort George Lovell Showroom at Duane and 14th streets. Doors open at 6 p.m. Ed Joyce, an adjunct instructor of geology at the college, will moderate a panel discussion. Speakers will include Seth Tichenor, CCC instructor of philosophy and religion, along with the Reverend Kit Ketchum of Pacific Unitarian Universalist Fellowship and Pastor Bill Van Nostran of the First Presbyterian Church of Astoria. Come early to the free event and visit with members of Indivisible North Coast. Seasonal ales and pub food will be available for sale, but no purchase is necessary. Minors are welcome. “Implicit in our understanding of

COURTESY CLATSOP COMMUNITY COLLEGE

our First Amendment right of religious freedom is the idea of separation of church and state,” Joyce wrote. “It has been well demonstrated throughout

history that both the church and state are more functional and effective when they are kept separate. “The present administration in Washington is proceeding with legislation that would severely breach the wall of separation between church and state on numerous fronts.” This timely panel discussion will explore several of the more egregious breaches, including the allowance of school prayer, overt discrimination involving religious liberties, school vouchers that provide public funding to private religious entities, and clergy who endorse political candidates from the pulpit. Before moving to Astoria more than two years ago, Joyce was president of the Philadelphia Chapter of Americans United for the Separation of Church & State.

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 9

The coast is in the cards during arts festival

COURTESY AARON TROTTER

The Peter Iredale shipwreck is one of many North Coast locales featured in Aaron Trotter’s deck of Illustrated Playing Cards.

CANNON BEACH — Oregon artist Aaron Trotter will release his latest deck of Illustrated Playing Cards, featuring the North Coast from Newport to Astoria, noon to 5 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, at Voyages Toys, Comics & Games (172 N. Hemlock St.) during Cannon Beach’s Stormy Weather Arts Festival. From Fort Stevens, the cards follow U.S. Highway 101 south to Tillamook and the Three Capes Scenic

Route, hugging the coastline to Yaquina Bay Bridge in Newport. Spanning just the northern half of the Oregon Coast, the diverse scenes include many famous destinations familiar to locals and visitors. The drawings were sketched on location over a succession of road trips in all weather over the last two years. They were finished in Trotter’s studio in Portland, or on the go with watercolor pencil, pen and ink. The

cards are digitally printed in Portland; each box is signed and numbered by the artist. The first printing will be limited to 100 decks. Each deck is made to be played, displayed, and used as a souvenir and guidebook. A separate deck focusing solely on Cannon Beach will be released in December; while a South Coast deck is planned for 2018. Learn more at illustratedplayingcards.com.

COURTESY AARON TROTTER

The cover of Aaron Trotter’s deck of Illustrated Playing Cards

A palette-able show, sale at Stormy Weather

COURTESY SOU’WESTER LODGE

Carolyn Hopkins and her clothing dyed indigo

Indigo: Prepare to dye SEAVIEW, WASH. — A workshop at the Sou’wester Lodge 1 to 3 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, will teach people how to make tote bags and scarves. Participants will learn shibori and wax-resist techniques in order to create patterns on a naturally dyed indigo piece. Instructor Carolyn Hopkins walk people through the process of how indigo works, and each person will leave with an item they made. Hopkins holds an MFA from the Cranbrook Academy of Art, and her work has been shown internationally. Her focus is the intersection of art and craft, and primary mediums are fibers, glass and clay.

The workshop costs $40, plus a $10 material fee that goes directly to the instructor. Wear clothing (or an apron) you don’t mind getting dye on and shoes that can get wet. Hot tea and coffee will be provided. All workshops are open to the public, and all skill levels are welcome. The class is for students age 18 and up; 10 students max. RSVP via souwesterfrontdesk@gmail.com or 360-642-2542. The class is part of the fall and winter 2017-18 workshop series at the Sou’wester (3728 J Place, Seaview, Washington). Visit souwesterlodge.com/ calendar to see the entire schedule of more than 28 artist-led workshops.

CANNON BEACH — The Palette Puddlers’ annual Stormy Weather weekend art show and sale will be held 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Friday, Nov. 3, and 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, at the Cannon Beach Community Church (132 E. Washington St.). Admission and refreshments are free. In addition, the artists will provide demonstrations of their particular art styles. Our artists are also willing to sell their “hot off the easel” work to interested buyers. The Palette Puddlers are a group of professional women artists, many of whom have painted together for years. Susan Bish, Judith Fredrikson, Mary Ann Gantenbein, Linda Gebhart, Suzanne King, Debbie Loyd, Jane McGeeham, Jo Pomeroy-Crockett, Barbara Thacker and Ellen Zimet will show and sell original works of art in a variety of mediums. There will be also be art reproductions, cards, small matted prints and gallery wraps to meet your holiday shopping needs. Our bargain bin includes original unmatted, unframed works of art for $20 each. Come early for the best selections. To check out the artists’

A watercolor by Debbie Loyd

A mixed-media piece by Ellen Zimet

COURTESY ELLEN ZIMET

A Jane McGeehan watercolor

work, visit palettepuddlers. com.

Piano and pictures

In addition, at 5 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 5, there will

be a solo piano and nature photoshow in the church area, featuring jazz pianist David Robinson playing four original jazz compositions — Water, Wind, Fire,

and Earth in the style of George Winston — while Thomas Robinson’s nature photography of water, wind, fire and earth show on the big screen. There is a suggested $10 donation to the Cannon Beach Food Pantry at the door. Look for the sandwich signboard on Hemlock and Washington streets. Enter through the church’s back door that faces the parking lot. We are in the all-purpose room that is accessible from the parking lot behind the church.

10 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

ART IN A

STORM Cannon Beach’s Stormy Weather Arts Festival celebrates 30th anniversary Nov. 3 through 5

By BRENNA VISSER

COAST WEEKEND

here was something special about Cannon Beach in the late 1980s. A group of artists, including Jeffrey Hull, Joyce Lincoln and Sharon Amber, decided to open their respective galleries. It was also when the Stormy Weather Arts Festival, a citywide event that showcases a wide range of visual and performing arts, was formed. Now marking its 30th anniversary, the festival will take place Friday through Sunday, Nov. 3 to 5. The event features musicians, the Dancing in the Rain Fashion Show with local and national designer labels, and an opportunity to meet artists to discuss their creations. Despite the name’s warning of inclement weather, the festival has evolved into one of Cannon Beach’s most popular events. This celebration of local artistry helped Cannon Beach get recognized as one of “The 100 Best Art Towns in America” by author John Villani. Hull recalls the festival’s humble beginnings. “I remember asking people in town if they were here for Stormy Weather Arts Festival, and Artist Erik Abel’s poster art for the 2017 Stormy Weather Arts Festival COURTESY CANNON BEACH CHAMBER OF COMMERCE

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 11

SCHEDULE OF EVENTS FRIDAY, NOV. 3 • 7:30 to 10 p.m. Stormy Weather Arts Benefit Cocktail & Dessert Party Interact with professional jewelry artists who discuss their techniques while their works are being modeled. Sample a custom cocktail, created specifically for the event by Cannon Beach Distillery, and a local craft beer also made especially for the event, alongside sparkling wine and a dessert buffet that features sweets from local bakeries and chocolatiers. The celebration will also include live music and a raffle and silent auction with vacation packages. Cost: $35. Location: Cannon Beach Community Hall COURTESY CANNON BEACH CHAMBER OF COMMERCE

they would say ‘huh?’” said Hull, who is known for his sea and landscape paintings. “It’s definitely grown as an event. In the first five years, people didn’t really know about it. Clearly, it has resonated.”

‘An adventure’

Amber doesn’t remember much about the first year of the festival, other than getting a knock on the door from a Chamber of Commerce employee asking if she’d be interested in participating in a brand new art festival. “It started as an itty bitty thing,” Amber said. “I didn’t know if it was going to get off the ground. I thought it would be too late in the season. Turns out it was successful because it is late in the season.” Amber is among the professional jewelers who will be featured at Friday’s Stormy Weather Arts Benefit Cocktail & Dessert Party. She’s been a jeweler for 44 years, 30 of them in Cannon Beach. While the ocean often serves as a design inspiration, this year visitors can expect to see jewelry reflecting the nearby woods. “It’s easy to go about your day and to not see the beauty that surrounds you, especially here,” Amber said. The natural world is integral to why artists feel inspired to work in Cannon Beach. And, as any person who lives on the coast knows, in the winter, mother nature isn’t always friendly. But for Jane Brumfield, the festival committee chair and owner of Imprint Gallery, the blustering winds and intense rainfall is

ERICK BENGEL PHOTO

Pam Wachtler-Fermanis (left), an oil painter from Bainbridge Island, Wash., discusses overtones and undertones with Trieste Andrews, from Oregon City, during the 2014 Stormy Weather Arts Festival.

‘IT STARTED AS AN ITTY BITTY THING.’ SHARON AMBER

part of what makes this event so special. “During my first year at Cannon Beach Arts Association, I remember it was sideways raining, and everyone came in dripping wet. But they would just bundle up and get blown over to the next gallery,” Brumfield said. “It becomes an adventure almost. It’s a shared experience.”

Timeless art

Jim Paino, interim director of the Chamber of Commerce and festival committee

member, said the festival has evolved from a small community event into a tourism-based one. “We want to make it bigger and better. It’s always a lot of work, but we’ve built it, and we want to keep it going for many years to come,” Paino said. The number of galleries has grown. Recent additions, like musicians and the fashion show, continue to diversify and expand. But one aspect of the festival seems to remain constant: the visitors. “I have about 15 people who have been coming for years,” Hull said. “They are clients, but really they are friends. I know about their kids and their dogs.” Lincoln, owner of Northwest By Northwest Gallery, has had a similar experience. Over the past 30 years, the group of visitors and locals who return each year has become a kind of arts community family, she said. There are lots of beautiful places to experience art in the Pacific Northwest. But, Lincoln said, Cannon Beach’s reputation as an art town isn’t determined by the number of galleries or artists, but by the type of art and the culture of the people who make and sell it. “(Cannon Beach) is a place to connect with artists, gallery owners, friends. It’s an authentic experience,” Lincoln said. “Trends are trends,” but the art that people buy in Cannon Beach is often timeless, she added. “It’s not something you’re going to get tired of.” CW

SATURDAY, NOV. 4 • 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. Music Around Town Enjoy live performances by regional musicians at five different locations. Cost: free/donations Locations: The Landing, Sandpiper Square, Coaster Theatre Courtyard, Ecola Square, Haystack Square • 10 a.m. (doors open at 9:40 a.m.) Dancing in the Rain Fashion Show Pick out a new outfit at this runway show featuring apparel and accessories from local and national designers available in Cannon Beach shops. Cost: Free, or $5 guaranteed seating donation. Location: Coaster Theatre Playhouse • 8 to 10 p.m. (doors open at 7:30 p.m.) Spotlight Concert: Heels to the Hardwood The Seattle Americana band brings their foot-stomping sound to Cannon Beach. Cost: $30. Location: Coaster Theatre Playhouse SUNDAY, NOV. 5 • 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. Brews, Blues & Barbecues Sample local craft brews, including one created especially for the festival, enjoy live Delta Blues from Steve Cheseborough and savor a delicious barbecue lunch from a local chef. Cost: $25. Location: Cannon Beach Community Hall

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 13

12 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

COA S T W E E K E N D C A L E N DA R Saturday, Nov. 4

Sunday, Nov. 5 First Saturday Art Walk

Beach Clean Up 9 a.m., meet at Seashore Inn on the Beach, 60 Promenade, Seaside. Join local volunteers for the monthly “Treasure the Beach” community beach clean up.

Educational Talk 6:30 p.m., Astoria Yacht Club, 300 Industry St., Astoria, 503-440-5474. Guest speaker Mark Woolsey of Coast Diesel will give a talk on pleasure craft maintenance, troubleshooting and selection of small marine diesel engines. “Camp Pleasant Trees” 7 p.m., Hannan Playhouse, 518 8th St., Raymond, Wash., $5. An original comedy by Russell Wiitala, about a camping adventure into the wilderness, features a cast of children ages 8 to 17. Author Reading 7 p.m., Seaside Public Library, 1131 Broadway, Seaside, 503-7386742. Langdon Cook, author of “Fat of the Land: Adventures of a 20th Century Forager” will be featured, followed by book sales and signings.

5 p.m., enjoy original artwork, live music and refreshments during Seaside’s monthly First Saturday Art Walk, includes artists receptions and demonstrations; look for art walk signs at participating merchants.

Junk Queens 9 a.m., Clatsop County Fairgrounds, 92937 Walluski Loop, Astoria, $5. The Astoria Junk Queens features vendors with primitives, antiques, country collectables, vintage gems and recycled items for home and garden.

Thursday, Nov. 2

Riverwalk Marketplace 9 a.m., 632 Marine Drive, Astoria, 503260-5592. This market features produce, flowers, plant starts, eggs, ready-to-eat food, pie walks, live music and kids’ activities.

“Camp Pleasant Trees” 7 p.m., Hannan Playhouse, 518 8th St., Raymond, Wash., $5. An original comedy by Russell Wiitala, about a camping adventure into the wilderness, features a cast of children ages 8 to 17.

√

Friday, Nov. 3 Film Festival 3 p.m., Columbian Theater, 1114 Marine Drive, Astoria, $5. Wandering Reel is a traveling short film festival featuring “Mare Nostrum,” “What Tears Us Apart,” “Artalde,” “White Face,” “Light Sight” and “The Sugaring Off;” followed by a Q&A discussion with Michael Harrington.

√

Junk Queens 5 p.m., Clatsop

COURTESY ELLEN ZIMET

County Fairgrounds, 92937 Walluski Loop, Astoria, $10. The Astoria Junk Queens features vendors with primitives, antiques, country collectables, vintage gems and recycled items for home and garden. Founder’s Dinner 5:30 p.m., Seaside Convention Center, 415 First Ave., Sea-

√

side, 503-338-0331, $50. Wildlife Center of the North Coast celebrates 20 years of serving local wildlife at its first Founder’s Dinner with guest speakers, no-host bar, raffle and auction. “Camp Pleasant Trees” 7 p.m., Hannan Playhouse, 518 8th St., Raymond, Wash., $5.

Coast Weekend editor suggested events

An original comedy by Russell Wiitala, about a camping adventure into the wilderness, features a cast of children ages 8 to 17. “Money Matters” 7 p.m., Barn Community Playhouse, 1204 Ivy Ave., Tillamook, 503-842-6305, $10 to $15. “Money Matters” is a romantic comedy with a few twists and turns, lots of laughs, strange sit-

√

uations and ghostly encounters. SWAF Benefit 7:30 p.m., Cannon Beach Community Hall, 207 Spruce St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2623, $35. A Stormy Weather arts benefit cocktail and dessert party kicks off the weekend’s events with art demonstrations, custom cocktails, craft beer, wine and dessert; includes live music, a raffle and silent auction.

ts n e m int o p p A adly l g e ar d! e t p e Acc

A piece by Jo PomeroyCrockett Art Show

10 a.m., Cannon Beach Community Church, 132 Washington St., Cannon Beach. Palette Puddlers will host its annual Stormy Weather weekend art show and sale showing artists demonstrating different styles and mediums.

Art Show 10 a.m., Cannon Beach Community Church, 132 Washington St., Cannon Beach. Palette Puddlers will host its annual Stormy Weather weekend art show and sale, showing artists demonstrating different styles and mediums. SWAF Weekend 10 a.m., various locations in Cannon

ON YOUR PHONE

Check out the Coast Weekend calendar, and other great content at CoastWeekend.com

“6 x 6” Art Show 5 p.m., Columbia Pacific Heritage Museum, 115 Lake St., Ilwaco, Wash., 360-642-3446, $15 to $20. “Something Happening Here” 6 x 6 art show and auction features more than 60 art objects from regional talent to be auctioned off at the annual fundraiser for the museum’s exhibition programs.

Beach, 503-436-2623. Celebrate the Stormy Weather Arts Festival with a weekend of events featuring artists, authors, poets, musicians and photographers throughout the city. SWAF Fashion Show 10 a.m., Coaster Theatre, 108 Hemlock St.,

√

Cannon Beach, 503436-2623, $5. Dancing in the Rain fashion show features apparel and accessories from local and national designers. Artist Reception 2 p.m., Trail’s End Art Gallery, 656 A St., Gearhart, 503-7179458. Sculptor Kathy Samsel will be the

featured artist at a reception exhibiting her work. Gearhart ArtWalk 2 p.m., celebrate creative art forms during the monthly Gearhart ArtWalk at businesses and galleries in Gearhart; look for “Welcome to the Shore” flags at participating merchants.

“Money Matters” 7 p.m., Barn Community Playhouse, 1204 Ivy Ave., Tillamook, 503-842-6305, $10 to $15. “Money Matters” is a romantic comedy with a few twists and turns, lots of laughs, strange situations and ghostly encounters. “Vintage Hitchcock” 7 p.m., NCRD Performing Arts Center, 36155 9th St., Nehalem, 855-444-6273, $15. Riverbend Players presents the master of suspense with “Vintage Hitchcock: A Live Radio Play,” three tales featuring spies, murder and love.

√

Riverwalk Marketplace 9 a.m., 632 Marine Drive, Astoria, 503260-5592. This market features produce, flowers, plant starts, eggs, ready-to-eat food, pie walks, live music and kids’ activities. SWAF Weekend 10 a.m., various locations in Cannon Beach, 503-436-2623. Celebrate the Stormy Weather Arts Festival with a weekend of events featuring artists, authors, poets, musicians and photographers throughout the city. Wild Mushroom Program 1 p.m., Fort Stevens State Park, 100 Peter Iredale Road, Hammond, 503-861-3170, $5 parking. A rang-

er-led tour to discover wild mushrooms and to learn the role they play in the health of a forest; meet at Coffenbury Lake. “Camp Pleasant Trees” 2 p.m., Hannan Playhouse, 518 8th St., Raymond, Wash., $5. An original comedy by Russell Wiitala, about a camping adventure into the wilderness, features a cast of children ages 8 to 17. “Vintage Hitchcock” 2 p.m., NCRD Performing Arts Center, 36155 9th St., Nehalem, 855-444-6273, $15. Riverbend Players presents the master of suspense with “Vintage Hitchcock: A Live Radio Play,” three tales featuring spies, murder and love.

Tuesday, Nov. 7 Iron Chef 5 p.m., Seaside Convention Center, 415 First Ave., Seaside, $35 to $75. The annual Iron Chef Goes Coastal features local chefs John Sowa and Jonathan Hoffman defending their titles and battling

for the coveted prize. Ric’s Poetry Mic 7 p.m., WineKraft, 80 10th St., Astoria, 503-468-0206, 21+. Sign up at 6:45 to read poetry or a short story at this monthly poetry open mic.

Coast Weekend welcomes comments and contributions from readers. New items for publication consideration must be submitted by 10 a.m. Tuesday, one week and two days before publication.

Express Healthcare for Busy Lifestyles Hours: Everyday 9am - 7pm

Keith Klatt, MD

Mark Tabor, PA-C

Sally Baker, PA-C

Kenyon Solecki, PA-C

Wednesday, Nov. 8

2120 Exchange Street, Suite 111 Astoria, Oregon 503-325-0333 www.urgentcarenwastoria.com

COLIN MURPHEY PHOTO

Mike Holland-Moritz of Portland searches for wild mushrooms at Fort Stevens State Park near Warrenton. Wild Mushroom Hike 1 p.m., Fort Stevens State Park, 100 Peter Iredale Road, Hammond, 503-861-3170. This is a guided hike for wild mushrooms. Dress for the weather, bring a basket, pocketknife and meet at Battery Russell.

√

HRAP Lecture Series 7 p.m., Cannon Beach Library, 131 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1391. Guest speaker Dr. Debbie Duffield presents “Marine Mammals, They Don’t Eat Grapes” opens the 2017-2018 season of the Haystack Rock lecture series.

Thursday, Nov. 9 Business After Hours 5:30 p.m., Sahara Pizza, 740 Astor St., Astoria, 503-325-6311. Sponsored by the Astoria Warrenton Chamber of Commerce, Business After Hours provides a social networking opportunity for chamber members to meet and mingle. Paint Party 6:30 p.m., Astoria Golf & Country Club, 33445 Sunset Beach Lane,

Warrenton, $35. Create an original piece of art in a relaxed setting with food and drink, all are welcome, limited seating. Nature Matters 7 p.m., Fort George Lovell Showroom, 426 14th St., Astoria, 503-861-4443. Guest speaker Meg Reed will give a presentation on citizen science, coastal hazards and community resilience.

14 // COASTWEEKEND.COM Coast Weekend’s local restaurant review

Dundee’s fare neither star nor benchwarmer Review and photos by THE MOUTH OF THE COLUMBIA

DUNDEE’S BAR & GRILL

MOUTH@COASTWEEKEND.COM

FACEBOOK.COM/MOUTHOFTHECOLUMBIA

Rating: 

or sports fans, fall presents a veritable quandary. As the summer sun recedes into late October and early November, the big three American professional leagues perk up. For a short time, the NFL, NBA and MLB not only overlap, but offer compelling reasons to tune in: baseball is neck-deep in the playoffs, football games become make-or-break, and basketball’s new-look teams are taking shape. On a few nights during this sports smorgasbord, I found myself at Dundee’s Bar & Grill in Seaside, drifting from one game to another. Like any sports bar worth its salt, Dundee’s has plenty of TVs, not only above the bar and papering the walls, but in a number of booths, too. And, as opposed to the more communal bar experience, it can be nice to have your own personal screen — sometimes you want to go out, be cooked for, but avoid the comments of would-be experts. Along with the glowing flatscreens, the collective groans, cheers and a cute but superfluous icy track ringing the bar that keeps drinks cold, Dundee’s offers the requisite sports bar foods: burgers, wings, pizza and the like. All come in reasonably hefty portions. To put it in sports terms: Dundee’s fare is akin to a “replacement-level player.” In other words: the food is neither star nor benchwarmer, but a dependable worker who executes a limited role. To be sure: players such as these, while perhaps indistinct, are necessary. Like a good blocker or third baseman, sometimes you need a simple sports bar with good sight-lines and food you can keep picking at through the

414 Broadway St. Seaside, Ore. 97138 503-738-7006 Hours: 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. everyday Price: $$ – Entrées start near the $10 range, drinks a bit pricey Service: Cheerful, competent Vegetarian / Vegan Options: Not a destination, but will have something for the vegetarian in your group Drinks: Full bar KEY TO STAR RATING SYSTEM  Below average  Average  Good  Excellent  Best in region

Pizza: on the left, Ricardo’s, on the right, Tillamook Head.

commercials. I began with the burger. It’s big, but the patty is thin and wide, flattened out. Bites have a beef-tobun ratio that’s light on beef. Of the handful of different variations, I had the Hot Lips ($9.99), and enjoyed the generous, gooey, creamy pile-up of pepper jack, twangy jalapeños, chipotle mayo and crispy shards of fried onion. Midway through I was dabbing sweat from my welled-up cheeks. The burger, like most of the sandwich-heavy menu, comes stocked with house-made potato chips, which I found wholly dull — either tasteless, oily crunch or soft and cardboard-y. Fries, tots, sweet potato fries, chowder, chili or a trip through salad bar can be had for $1.99 more. The salad bar, with a foot still

planted in the era where cottage cheese and peaches are indispensable, was nonetheless worth the minimal up-charge. I was thankful for the spinach, so much heartier than a wilting, watery iceberg mix. Really though, the simple act of making it my way is what did it. (On a recent trip to a similar sports bar I was reminded how lame salads at places like these can be: easily ruined with a crop dusting of chalky shredded cheese, for example.) Despite the thin, snappy parlor-style crust, Dundee’s pizzas are weighty, loaded with deep layers of cheese, an unsweetened marinara and piled with toppings. In one instance I counted seven pepperonis layered over each other. There are four tiers of pie and

four sizes, from 8-to-16 inches. The premium-tier 16-inch varieties top out at $25.99. I tried two different iterations from the most-loaded category, both marinara-based: the Ricardo’s and the Tillamook Head, which a server told me was one of the most popular. The Tillamook Head was absolutely teeming, with almost full coverage of ground beef and sausage blacking out everything below (salami, pepperoni, Canadian bacon, mushrooms, olives, green peppers, onions, pineapple). Seriously, it was burgers upon burgers of ground meats. The Ricardo’s, with salty prosciutto, pepperoni, garlic and olives, swerves into its own lane thanks to dry chèvre and sun-dried tomatoes. The pizza hit the necessary marks. So did the fried, beer-battered

fish. Cod, tuna and halibut are available, either as fish-and-chips or in a sandwich. I went with the sandwich, and on the server’s recommendation, chose the tuna ($12.99). The crust was right on, the fish thick and flaky. And while not astoundingly fresh or flavorful, the essence was there. The Wings (eight for $8.99, available in hot & spicy, teriyaki, spicy Asian and BBQ) were big, and they scratch that itch. And while no particular dish I ate at Dundee’s will be gracing the All-Star Team, they all earn their spots on the roster. Just like replacement-level players, when they’re doing their job right, you might not even notice. As such, what may end up coloring your experience at Dundee’s is whether your team wins. CW

dining out

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 15

ASTORIA CORNER DELI

◆ Local ◆ Fresh ◆ Gourmet

See for full menu 304 37th Street | Astoria, OR 97103 503-325-7768

ECIAL!

TU E

Y PI Z Z A DA Pizz2 for as

All orders take-out

503.325.7414 bakedak.com #1 12th Street, Astoria, OR

3 8TH & L, ON THE S EAV IEW BEAC H APPROAC H 3 60-642-7880

W ED BURG ER NITES ARE BAC K !

North Coast and Peninsula

Now offering soups, paninis, beer & wine. Come check out our new addition. You don’t need to zip to come sip. 503.861.9875 92111 Highlife Rd, Warrenton www.highlife-adventures.com PHOTOS COURTESY SUSAN THOMAS

Imagine Your

LEFT: A sculpture by Kathy Samsel, on view at Trail’s End Art Assocation Gallery. RIGHT: Sculptures by Kathy Samsel, Trail’s End Art Association’s new featured artist

Restaurant

Advertised Here! Great pub grub & craft beer

Nov.

GEARHART — The next Gearhart Art Walk takes place 2 to 5 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, giving patrons the opportunity to check out different forms and ﬂavors of art — and start their holiday shopping early!

A Great Gallery 503.755.1818 www.camp18restaurant.com Favorite stop to & from the Coast ILIES FAM OME! C WEL

Hungry Harbor GrillE 3 13 Pa c ific Hw y, Do w n to w n Lo n g Be a c h, W A 3 60-642-5555 • w w w.hu n gryha rb o r.c o m

–– OPEN DAIL Y! ––

Seaview, WA ▪ 360.642.4150 shelburnerestaurant.com

Advertise

Y our Restaurant

Here!

576 Pacific Way 503-709-2840 agreatgallery.com It’s time to start celebrating the holidays at A Great Gallery. Holiday cards, gift tags, night lights, clocks, hand-knitted items and beautiful jewelry by Donna Mareina. Refreshments and chocolate always!

Romancing the Home

1157 N. Marion Avenue Gearhart 503-717-8150 www.mcmenamins.com

3350 U.S. Highway 101 N. 503-738-9977 linda_toler@yahoo.com In addition to the work of modern artists Gayle Pedemonte and Tom Grogg, Romancing the Home will feature antique and vintage paintings

throughout the shop. There is something for everyone — whether you enjoy oil paintings, Asian ink drawings, or watercolors, we would like to share what we have with you. There will be refreshments, so please join us.

Trails End Art Association

656 A St. 503-717-9458 trailsendart.org Trail’s End Gallery will open a new show with a reception for the featured artist, Kathy Samsel. During Art Walk hours, the Art Association will offer a fun, brand new “Make It and Take It” workshop for all ages.

A piece by Kathy Samsel

The gallery will also display original paintings in watercolor, oil, acrylic and pastel. Browsers will find prints, photography, mixed media, cards and gifts in the gallery entrance. For more information about the Trail’s End Art Association, please visit trailsendart.org. New members are always welcome and need not be juried to join. Reach the membership chair by calling the office at 503-7179458. Winter hours are 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Wednesday through Sunday.

16 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

Nov.

SEASIDE — Celebrating 13 years in 2017, the next Seaside First Saturday Art Walk will be held 5 to 7 p.m. Nov. 4. Visitors meet artists, see original art, sip wine and snag appetizers by favorite restaurants and personal chefs, view artist demonstrations and, oftentimes, enjoy live music performances. The free event is all about seeing and selling art in the galleries and boutiques located between Holladay Drive and Broadway Street in downtown Seaside’s historic Gilbert District. Complimentary parking for the historic Gilbert District is on the corner of Holladay Drive and Oceanway Street.

Peddler’s Row

600 Broadway St. Featuring vintage original oils, designer goods, work created by artisans and one-of-a-kind collectibles gathered from all over the country. Peddler’s Row is a new-old business curated by Avery Loschen and Will Perkins, property owners of the Gilbert Block Building. Loschen and

The

Illahee Apartments

Perkins are extraordinary collectors of anything and everything. Peddler’s Row will showcase exquisite objects d’art, selected as goods to sell because they are beautiful, artistic or interesting. Offering wine tasting during the Art Walk.

1046 Grand Avenue Astoria, OR 97103

503-325-2280

COURTESY DENISE FAIRWEATHER

“Breaking Through,” by Nanette Tsatsaronis, on view at Art-in-the-Loft Gallery

SunRose Gallery

606 Broadway St. Colorful and inspiring, SunRose features the spectrum of creative, recycled art to fine art mosaics by local, regional and nationally known artists. Visit with owner and artist Cathy Tippin in her studio as she creates broken china mosaics in the French tradition. SunRose also offers artful women’s accessories, gifts, home decor and eclectic garden art. SunRose is offering an open house with appetizers for November.

Fairweather House & Gallery

Downtown Astoria’s Most Respected Apartment Complex Since 1969.

COURTESY DENISE FAIRWEATHER

A piece at SunRose Gallery

612 Broadway St. Opening reception of the exhibit titled “First Look,” a highly anticipated jewelry truck show, will feature a dozen local and regional designers, including a select group who have been represented by the gallery more than 11 years. Designer Cindy Bricca incorporates Kumihimo, the ancient Japanese seed braiding, in must-have creations. Elaine Sawyer uses natural stone Cabochons, cut and polished by in lapidary by her husband, Mike, to create one-of-a-kind cuff bracelets. Barbara Walker works in precious metal wire, turning earrings into wearable works of art. Mary Hurst, who was born and

COURTESY DENISE FAIRWEATHER

TRAV WILLIAMS PHOTO

Baskets at Moxie Shine

raised in County Tipperary, Ireland, and studied fashion design at the Grafton Academy in Dublin, integrates past and present Celtic designs in each piece. Billie Johnstone, a former clinical practitioner, sparked her retirement into a means to support youth programs in Soweta, South Africa, with the proceeds from the sales of her handcrafted jewelry, doing good works that change lives. Alan Stockham creates unique silver rings, cuffs and necklaces, each signed and numbered, with stones from the Pacific Northwest and beyond. Cher Flick, who has a graduate degree from the Gemological

Institute of America, creates jewelry doing good works, by giving back to a charitable foundation in honor of her mother, Joanie. Karen Johnson, a natural-born artist, boldly designs meticulously handcrafted statement jewelry that could be featured in magazines. Mary Boitta experiments in druzy rock crystals, semi-precious stones in designs that retain femininity and fineness. Robyn Hall, with no art degree or formal training, creates stunning mouth-blown lamp work bracelets and earrings. Debra Beard, often featured as cruise ship event designer, offers pieces that are a mini-exploration from travels around the world.

Alan Stockham’s work, on display at Fairweather House & Gallery

Fred Lukens crafts architecturally inspired jewelry featuring responsibly collected rare wood and Oregon myrtlewood. Reneé Hafeman embraces a love of vintage jewelry and gives a them new life. Redesigning the antique pieces, she prays: “Whoever wears, please be blessed in some way.” Naturalist Neal Maine will speak at 6 p.m. about the ecology of the local habitat. Music by Shirley 88. Enter a raffle for a baker’s dozen of door prizes, jewelry by Fairweather designers!

Art-in-the-Loft Gallery at Beach Books

616 Broadway St. Art-in-the-Loft hosts “Emergence II,”

an exhibit featuring Stefanie Shilling and Nanette Tsatsaronis. “Why do I paint? Connection,” Shilling, an acrylic artist, said. Connection to a part of myself, connection to those around me. I believe art is an extension of one’s self, an offering, a moment in time. And, for me, art is a way of finding my way to the essence of who I am and what my existence means to the world.” Tsatsaronis, an oil painter, writes: “The beauty of the ever-changing sky and landscape will always be my greatest inspiration. I’m enthralled by the way the constant motion of the elements at play cast varying degrees of light and shadow on the earth, as it influences all life. I have found no greater canvas than the fluidity of our spectacular Oregon sky, with its hope and power.”

Moxie Shine

609 Broadway St. Moxie is a unique and conscientious business filled with the eclectic from exclusive jewelry and art where everything is handmade. Illustrious and innovative, Moxie is an altruistic institution of significant change in the world of business. An established member of the Fair Trade Federation, Moxie demonstrates a genial and equitable approach to conducting business. Find additional original art during the day at Hold Fast Gallery, 611 Broadway St.; Seaside Antique Mall, 726 Broadway St.; Seaside Coffee House, 3 N. Holladay Drive and Dough Dough Bakery, 8 N. Holladay Drive.

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 17

THE NEW YORK TIMES MAGAZINE CROSSWORD

Kitchen Music 1 p.m., Long Beach Grange, 5715 Sandridge Road, Long Beach, Wash., 360642-2239. All levels welcome to bring instruments and join the jam session to play, sing or listen to folk, bluegrass, country, blues and pop music. Alastair Greene Band 2 p.m., The Birk, 11139 Hwy. 202, Birkenfeld, 503-755-2722, $15. Alastair Greene is known for his blues-based, soulful and melodic guitar playing ranging from blues to southern rock. “35 & You” 2:30 p.m., Liberty Theater, 1203 Commercial St., Astoria, 503-325-5922, no cover. CCC Foundation presents “35

and You,” an afternoon recital of 35 songs by composers Ravel, Copland, Poulenc, Freiberger, Quilter and Lynn, featuring Deac Guidi and accompanist Susan Buehler. Evensong 6 p.m., Cannon Beach Community Church, 132 Washington St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1222. Evensong features performers Jennifer Goodenberger and Wes Wahrmund, meditative songs and quiet reflection. Skadi Freyer 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Skadi Freyer plays jazz compositions on piano. Strange Hotel 7 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-642-

94 100

104 108

53 Got one’s feet wet? 55 Harry’s wizarding foe 56 Never-before-seen 57 Candy-heart message 58 Suisse peaks 59 A fish … or to cook it, in a way 60 Have nutritious foods 61 Pariahs 62 Flinching, typically 65 Play up 68 K-12 69 What “w” is in Welsh, at times

2311, no cover. Strange Hotel is a four-member rock band influenced by soul, jazz, rhythm-n-blues and fusion music. Omarr Awake 8 p.m., Fort George Brewery, 1483 Duane St., Astoria, 503-325-7468, no cover. Songwriter guitarist Omarr Awake plays rock, soul and pop music.

Tuesday, Nov. 7 Brian O’Connor 5:30 p.m., Shelburne Inn Restaurant, 4415 Pacific Way, Seaview, Wash., 360642-4150, no cover. Acoustic guitarist Brian O’Connor’s repertoire includes nostalgic favorites, an eclectic mix of jazz standards as well as original compositions.

75 79 86

90 96

101 105

107

33 38

13 21

30 36

DOWN Sci-fi weapons Symbol of strength Stonehenge priests McKellen who played Gandalf City south of Seminole, Okla. Singer with the 2012 No. 1 hit “Somebody That I Used to Know” 7 Apple desktop 8 New Year’s Eve figure 9 Mrs., abroad 10 Ad ____ tax 11 Daring thing to wear with polka dots 12 ____ Gabriel Mountains 13 Big gust 14 Eponymous Israeli gun designer 15 Get by 16 Refine 17 What metathesiophobia is the fear of 18 Kind of penguin 21 Splat preceder 23 Out of whack 27 Connoisseur 30 Capital of Qatar 32 Some salmon 33 Get old 36 $100 bills, in slang 37 Study 39 Turn over 40 Yiddish cries 43 José, Bengie and Yadier ____, catcher brothers with five World Series rings among them 44 Redundant-sounding engine parts 45 Like the 1-to-7 balls 48 Prepared for takeoff 49 Stag 50 Actress Russo 51 Like trampolines 52 ____ ballerina 1 2 3 4 5 6

6 18

Answers on Page 20

Continued from Page 5

By Ross Trudeau / Puzzles Edited by Will Shortz to 101-Across 63 Full house, for one 64 ____ mater 65 Ideas spreading virally 66 Duel tool 67 Blue Devils’ org. 68 Hephaestus’ forge is said to be under it 69 Uninspired 70 Satiated 71 What I may turn into 73 Coin at an arcade 74 “The Merry Drinker” painter 76 “The Force Awakens” 79 Traffic-monitoring org. 82 Herb pronounced differently in the U.S. and U.K. 84 Appears 85 Item with the words “Member Since” 87 White House extension? 88 George Takei’s role on the U.S.S. Enterprise, in brief 90 Small beam 91 When Macduff slays Macbeth 92 They’re first in the draft 95 “Sure” 96 Brunch offering 98 Where Samson slew the Philistines 99 F-150s or Thunderbirds, or a further hint to 76-Across 101 “The Dark Knight” 104 Onlooker 105 Ills 106 “Friday I’m in Love” band, 1992 107 Caviars 108 Defib locales 109 “In that case …” 110 Language in which the first four cardinal numbers are ane, twa, three and fower

GOING OFF SCRIPT

ACROSS 1 Lecterns 6 Some looping online animations 10 No. 2’s 13 Canine supporters 17 It’s all an act 19 Actor Epps 20 “Abracadabra!” 22 “The Lion King” 24 Pool divider, or a further hint to 22-Across 25 Wine often served with dessert 26 College department that might offer paid studies, informally 27 “Who, me?” 28 Majestic 29 Get excited about crosswords, say, with “out” 30 Hockey feint 31 Hallmark.com offerings 34 Bond, for one: Abbr. 35 Fig. on a master’s application 37 Geometry-test directive 38 Maître’s domain 41 Suffix with legal 42 “Jerry Maguire” 45 Box a bit 46 Hunter in the night sky 47 Feature of Chairman Mao’s cap 51 Reaction to a bad joke 52 They’re often cross-bred with apricots 53 Smart-alecky 54 American pale ____ 55 Bozo 56 Get up 57 Judge’s seat 58 Neural conductor 59 Carnival, say, or a further hint to 42-Across 61 Musical score marking, or a further hint

109

72 Window fixtures, for short 73 Get ready to drive 74 Most cozy 75 “Preach!” 77 Publishers 78 ____ Productions, company behind TV’s “Dr. Phil” 79 Look onto the street, say 80 First family after the Garfields 81 Counsel 82 Endangered ape 83 Opposed (to)

NC Orchestra 6:30 p.m., Cannon Beach Community Church, 132 Washington St., Cannon Beach, no cover. North Coast Chamber Orchestra offers a free open rehearsal concert for its upcoming season “Falling for Winter.” Wanderlodge 7 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Wanderlodge plays rock, rock-n-roll and country music.

Wednesday, Nov. 8 Thistle & Rose 5 p.m., The Bistro, 263 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2661. Thistle and Rose play folk, Americana and bluegrass music from the 70s and

102

103

106 110

86 Multicolored 87 Choose 89 Jazz pianist McCoy ____ 90 Artist’s base 93 Coolers in coolers 94 Camera option, for short 97 Loafs around a deli? 100 “____ had it!” 101 The U.S. joined it in 1917: Abbr. 102 Quizzical utterances 103 Fun, for short

80s, and original tunes. Buzz Rogowski 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Acoustic jazz pianist Buzz Rogowski includes smooth jazz, instrumental and new age compositions in his repertoire. Wanderlodge 7 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Wanderlodge plays rock, rock-n-roll and country music. Metzner & Patenaude 9 p.m., Voodoo Room, 1114 Marine Drive, Astoria, 503-325-2233, no cover, 21+. Scheckie Metzner and Pee Wee Patenaude play blues, soul and Caribbean music with Josh Baer on bass.

18 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

coa st w eeken d M ARK ETPLACE 651 Help Wanted

651 Help Wanted

652 Work Wanted

Seaside School District

Elements Restoration is looking for a Retail Store Sales Manager. Previous sales experience a must. Includes: Knowledge of floor coverings, cabinetry and countertops. Call Scott at (503)440-1542

Healthcare Jobs Now Hiring RN’s up to $45/hr LPN’s up to $37.50/hr CNA’s up to 22.50/hr Free gas/weekly pay $2000 Bonus AACO Nursing Agency 1-800-656-4414 708-897-5860.

Licensed Practical Nurse needed for implementing and supervising nursing services in a medical detoxification and residential program.

Seaside School District Is seeking a competent, caring, tech-comfortable person for:

Is seeking a: PART TIME BUS DRIVER Paid Training available Visit our employment page for more information and to apply: www.seaside.k12.or.us/ employment or (503) 738-5591 The District is an EOE The City of Cannon Beach is seeking qualified applicants for the position of Police Officer. Salary: $22.90 to $29.22 Hourly Closing Date: 11/10/17 For application information please visit: www.ci.cannon-beach.or.us/ police/page/police-officer-job Housekeeping, Front Desk, Maintenance positions available. Full/Part-time positions. Must be 18 and valid driver’s license required and no SR22s. Applications may be picked up and returned at: Inn of the Four Winds 820 N. Prom. Seaside Oregon Customer Service Representative Must possess excellent customer service skills, computer/data entry, file, fax, answer phones. Must be dependable, organized, self-motivated and a team player.

Client Service Representative We are looking for an energetic individual, with multi-tasking abilities and great customer service skills to join our team. Salary DOE, competitive benefit package, vacation. Send resumes to: sseppa@knutsenins.com or PO Box 657, Astoria, OR 97103 The Gearhart City Council is looking for a volunteer to appoint to the Gearhart Planning Commission. The planning commission consists of seven voting members to be appointed by the mayor with the concurrence of a majority of the city council. Applications, requirements and questionnaires for the planning commission may be picked up at the Gearhart City Hall or downloaded at www.cityofgearhart.com/jobs. Applications must be returned to city hall by November 24th. Interviews will take place at the December 6th city council meeting.

SERVICE & DELIVERY TECH

Requirements: HS Diploma, previous install work, plumbing or gas fitting license. pref., Class A or B CDL w/ hazmat/tanker Apply online at Ferrellgas.com/Careers EOE/AAP/M/F/D/V

- Certification from accredited school and current Washington LPN licensure to practice. -One year of experience as an LPN providing specialized care for persons with drug and/or alcohol dependency including withdrawal intervention

MCMENAMINS Sand Trap Pub is Now Hiring Servers! What we need from you: An open and flexible schedule, including days, evenings, weekends and holidays. Previous experience is preferred! A love of working in a busy, customer service-oriented environment. Seasonal and Long term positions are available. Interested in a career in the hospitality industry? We offer opportunities for advancement as well as an excellent benefit package to eligible employees, including vision, medical, chiropractic, dental and so much more! Apply online 24/7 at mcmenamins.com OR stop by the Sand Trap and fill out an application. 1157 N. Marion Ave. Gearhart, OR 97138 EOE. GOLF GAME gone to pot? Sell those old clubs with a classified ad.

-Current BLS required -Must have a NPI Please send resume to

kedwards@kleancenter.com

360-642-3105 Ext 2233

652 Work Wanted

HIRING MACHINE OPERATORS Georgia Pacific Wauna Mill Contact Info City: Clatskanie, OR Call Kristin Barnes 404-652-6242 Apply Online: http://jobs.encadria.com/ index.smpl HAVING storage problems? Why not sell no-longer-used items with a fastworking classifed ad?

IF YOU HAVE an eye for real value, you’ll eye the classified ads regularly.

Submit resume and cover letter to North Coast Home Care. Email kevin@nchc.net or fax (503)325-1437

Ferrellgas is looking for a full time Service & Delivery Tech in Long Beach, WA.

Qualifications:

Maintenance Person for vacation rental homes in Cannon Beach. Must be self-starter skilled in basic home repairs. Position is full time and permanent. Send Resume to: Cannon Beach Vacation Rentals P.O. Box 723 Cannon Beach, OR 97110

Follow us on Facebook! See all of our “New Today!” listings posted daily on Facebook. Follow us at: facebook.com/CoastMarketplace

ASSISTANT COOK Great work environment And EXCELLENT benefits! Visit our employment page for more information and to apply: www.seaside.k12.or.us/ employment or (503) 738-5591 The District is an EOE The Oregon Department of Forestry, Astoria District is recruiting for a permanent, full-time Automotive Technician 2. Salary:$3129-$4545 Monthly -Requires four years of journey-level automotive mechanic’s experience The goal of this recruitment is to fill the position at the Automotive Technician 2 level, however, we encourage candidates who meet the minimum qualifications for Automotive Technician 1 level to apply. If we are unable to fill the position at the higher level we will consider underfilling it at the Automotive Technician 1 level. Underfill Option: Automotive Technician 1 Salary:$2647-$3761 Monthly -Requires two years of journey-level automotive mechanic’s experience Application Opening Date- 10/23/17 Application Closing Date- 11/13/17 Job description: To be responsible for the overall operation of motor pool activities; coordinates vehicle acquisition, manages a preventative maintenance program through scheduled inspections, equipment service, and maintains the records for repairs and maintenance. Additionally, this position designs, constructs, and maintains various fire apparatus. This position supports all of the District’s personnel and the Department’s mission. For more details and to apply: www.governmentjobs.com/ careers/oregon (Astoria) For specific questions regarding this job, please call Neal Bond, Protection Unit Forester 503-325- 5451

652 Work Wanted

Part-Time Receptionist Email, Drop Off, or Mail to 2120 Exchange St, Suite 111 Astoria, OR Vycky.Wagner@urgentcare nwastoria.com

Lead Water Utility Operator Full-time Lead Maintenance position to operate 2 water treatment plants & distribution system in Svensen, Oregon. Must be self-motivated, able to work independently, have supervisory skills, able to monitor & maintain systems, plan & implement repairs or improvements, respond to emergencies. Must have or be able to obtain within 1-year: Level 2 Water Treatment & Distribution, Sand Filter Endorsement, Backflow & Cross-Connection Certification. Prefer 4-5 years water maintenance experience. Requires valid driver’s license, effective communication skills, frequent computer use, comprehension of water line construction & regulatory compliance. Health insurance & PERS. Salary DOE. Drug-free workplace, EOE. Email resume, work history, contact details to: afognak3ak@iinet.com

828 Misc for Sale

Davidson 701D one color printing press Clean and in excellent shape. Has been running daily. New 208 ac motor. Extra supplies and parts. Services & parts manuals. $1,500 OBO Available Oct 1 in Astoria, OR you haul. Contact Tom or Carl at The Daily Astorian 503-325-3211

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 19

110 Announcements

New Patient Special Dr. Stephanie White is inviting you to her practice to receive the highest quality care for your dental needs. Mention this Ad and receive a Free Electric Toothbrush! Schedule Today!! 503-738-9273 3965 HWY 101 N. Gearhart, OR 97138 www.gearhartdentistry.com Email:

604 Apartments Astoria, 222 Alameda. 1 bedroom, $700-$750+deposit. Hot water included. No pets/smoking. References. 503-680-4210 Seaside: Riverview, 2 bedroom, 1 bath Washer/dryer, carport. $875 per month+deposit. DNC Rental Properties (503)791-2855

613 Houses 3/bd, 2/ba, 2100sqft. Riverfront in Hammond Single-car garage. $1750/mo(tenant pays utilities) No pets/smoking 503-861-1494

frontdesk@gearhartdentistry.com

Special applies to new patients that receive a comprehensive exam. Special expires 12/31/17

204 Automobiles 2003 Ford Explorer XLT Excellent condition 165,000 miles $4000/obo 360-665-2336 or 360-244-1397

504 Homes for Sale 92159 Clover Road Astoria, OR 2/bd 1/ba Fireplace, large backyard, water frontage. $130,000 firm Lots of potential. (503)325-2068

525 Commercial Property Astoria: 3925 Abbey Lane, 800 SF. Starting at $.50/SF (503)440-6945

Commercial Sports Bar & Restaurant For Sale Newer roof & parking lot Seller financing Easy access off Highway 101 Monthly sign lease income 5 lottery machines $525,000. MLS# 17579359, Kip Running, See at: 2490 N. Highway 101, Seaside , OR, 503-799-2488 www.runningre.com kip@runningre.com GARAGE SALES are a big success when advertised in the classified ads!

John Orr Jazz Trio plays WineKraft

Artistic Cannon Beach Vacation Home available for longer-term rental. Beautifully appointed four bedroom main home with detached office/studio. Walk to town and beaches, peekaboo view. $3500 month. Photos cannot describe the serenity and ambiance of this home. A must see. Owned by nationally collected, Cannon Beach artist, Miska 425-922-6329

651 Help Wanted Hiring CDL drivers for the Astoria and Warrenton areas. Home daily, paid weekly. Call for details (360)262-9383 Local upscale restaurant Hiring a chef and Line cooks Please send resume to Blind Box 33 c/o The Daily Astorian P.O. Box 210, Astoria, OR 97103 The Portway is looking for an experienced cook. Full-time/year round. Please apply in person at the Portway 422 West Marine Drive, Astoria. No phone calls please. Looking for a new place to live? The classified ads offer a complete section of homes, apartments, and mobile homes to fit your needs. Check daily for new listings!

DAMIAN MULINIX PHOTO

John Orr

ASTORIA — The John Orr Jazz Trio will play at WineKraft in Astoria (80 10th St.) 7 to 9 p.m. Friday, Nov. 3. The Trio consists of Joe Church (bass), Tom Peake (drums) and John Orr (electric guitar and voice). The band draws from an eclectic jazz repertoire of Latin jazz, swing and an occasional ballad.

Orr’s musical style is influenced by Wes Montgomery, Joe Pass, Harry Connick and Mose Allison. The trio is at once relaxing, stimulating and upbeat. The group is available for booking for clubs, parties and holiday gatherings for Christmas jazz. Contact Orr at realjohnnyo@gmail. com or call 503-7416085.

Expert examines natural, human-related influences on sedimentation in Lower Nehalem Bay MANZANITA — The Lower Nehalem Watershed Council will welcome Rob Wheatcroft, of Oregon State University, for the next installation of the Speaker Series 7:20 p.m. Thursday, Nov. 9, at the Pine Grove Community House (225 Laneda Ave.) in Manzanita. The presentation will follow an update from the Watershed Council at 7 p.m. Doors open at 6:30 p.m. The event is free and open to the public. Wheatcroft will examine how natural processes — such as variations in river flow and coastal uplift, as well as human-related processes, such as timber harvesting and land reclamation — combine to influence the supply and accumulation of sediment and organic carbon in Oregon estuaries. The Nehalem River system will be featured, but lessons learned from other dispersal systems in the Pacific Northwest will be used to provide context. In his research, Wheatcroft, a professor in the College of Earth, Ocean, and Atmospheric Sciences, focuses on the transport and accumulation of sediment and organic carbon across the land-ocean boundary from event to millennial time scales. This interest has led him and his students to study small, mountainous river systems in the Apennines, Pyrenees, California and the Pacific Northwest. He is leading a team funded by Oregon Sea Grant to better understand the competing roles of relative sea-level rise and river sediment supply in the accumulation of sediment and carbon in Oregon estuaries over the last 300 years. Find more information on the speaker series on the Watershed Council’s Facebook page (facebook.com/lnwc1).

L. BROPHY PHOTO

From left: Sean Mahaffey (Oregon Sate University), Narayan Elasmar (Columbia River Estuary Study Taskforce) and Grace Molino (Brown University) work to extract a 3-meter-long core from a Nehalem Bay marsh in June 2016.

20 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

‘World of Haystack Rock’ lectures announced CANNON BEACH — The Friends of Haystack Rock have announced this year’s schedule for the upcoming library lecture series “The World of Haystack Rock.” This series is free to the public and held the second Wednesday of each month, November through April, from 7 to 8:30 p.m. at the Cannon Beach Library (131 N. Hemlock St.). For nine years, the Friends of Haystack Rock — a nonprofit that supports the Haystack Rock Awareness Program — has put on “The World of Haystack Rock” with the help from the Cannon Beach Library.

Schedule

• Wednesday, Nov. 8 “Marine Mammals, They Don’t Eat Grapes” with Debbie Duffield, professor at Portland State University and coordinator for the Northern Oregon/ Southern Washington Marine Mammal Stranding Network • Wednesday, Dec. 13 “The Puffin Study” with

COURTESY LEWIS AND CLARK NATIONAL HISTORICAL PARK

Meg Reed, the coastal shores specialist for the Department of Land Conservation and Development’s Coastal Management Program ERICK BENGEL PHOTO

With his eye to the bird scopes, Cosmo Simmons scans Haystack Rock for tufted puffins in 2015.

Shawn Stephenson, a wildlife biologist with the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service • Wednesday, Jan. 10 “The Marine Reserves Research Project” Wolfe Wagman, from the state Department of Fish and Wildlife • Wednesday, Feb. 14 “Through the Looking Glass: New Perspectives on Whale Ecology to Inform

Coaster Theatre Playhouse

• Wednesday, March

“Axial Seamount: The Most Active Volcano in the Pacific Northwest” with Bill Chadwick, a research professor at Oregon State University’s Hatfield Marine Science Center • Wednesday, April 11 “Life in the Coastal Edge” with Katie Volke, director of the North Coast Land Conservancy

COURTESY FRIENDS OF HAYSTACK ROCK

A sea lion

Conservation” with Leigh Torres, assistant professor at Oregon State University

Crossword Answer C H A N G E

Nov. 17 - Dec. 23, 2017 Tickets $20 or $25 Shows begin at 7:30 p.m.

Sunday shows start at 3:00p.m. Sponsored by The Clark Foundation Tickets: 503-436-1242 or coastertheatre.com 108 N Hemlock Street, Cannon Beach, OR

P H A S E R S

C H A R

D R A C O

G O F O R

B O N O B O

O A K T R E E

D R U I D S S O L I D

B O U N C Y A C A S V E A R D S E E S

I A A D E N A M A P S D E K C O R E S H O W P A R O P T A R S E L I A L M E T N A L W E H E W I I L S L T S S Y U L I N E R V E R E R S

G O T Y E M O L I N A T E E U P

I M A C P E R U S E

F A T H E R T I M E

M A K E M U C W H W O I F V O W E L

S R A C O H O S L E P E R S R Y E S

M A V E N

V A L O R E M W A D E D

B E M I N E H A G R E P S O S O

P L A I D O R I N G S H O M I E S T

S G A K A N E L R E S E C O N E Y E D S S E C A E R L E P F E A L S M E E X C N A L E R I H E C S C O

U Z I G A L

M A N A G E

S M E L T

T A X I E D

A L O N E

R E N E

F A C E O U T

A R T H U R S

A D V I S E

Nature Matters talks coastal hazards wrought by climate change ASTORIA — In the face of a changing climate, Oregon’s already dynamic coastal environment will continue to see challenges to development, infrastructure, recreation and natural environments. All levels of government, organizations and individuals are faced with difficult questions about how best to prepare, adapt and mitigate for these challenges. Meg Reed, the coastal shores specialist for the Department of Land Conservation and Development’s Coastal Management Program, will address those dynamics and more 7 p.m. Thursday, Nov. 9, at a Nature Matters presentation. The discussion takes place at the Fort George’s Lovell Building showroom in Astoria. Doors open at 6 p.m. for those wanting to purchase dinner or beverages. The event — which is free and open to the public — will examine some of the hazards coastal communities face and how climate change factors into the policies and manage-

ment of coastal resources and development. Additionally, the talk will discuss ways in which citizens can help provide coastal managers with local data through King Tides photographs to better help visualize the impacts of sea level rise. To find out more about the King Tides Photo Project, visit oregonkingtides. net. Nature Matters, a lively conversation about the intersection of nature and culture, takes place on the second Thursday of each month through May. The events are hosted by Lewis and Clark National Historical Park in partnership with the North Coast Watershed Association, the Lewis & Clark National Park Association and Fort George Brewery. For more information, call the park at 503-861-2471 or check out nps.gov/lewi or Lewis and Clark National Historical Park on Facebook or Instagram.

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 21

Oregon Marketplace hosts artists, funds good causes SEASIDE — It’s all going to the dogs (and cats)! Astoria artist Ronni Harris will be having a pop-up event noon to 4 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4, at Oregon Marketplace in Seaside. A portion of the proceeds from her dog portraits, tiles and other art will go to Clatsop County Animal Shelter. Oregon Marketplace will be adding to the fund with sales from dog and cat merchandise from the shop. The shop will also have a wine tasting featuring wine from Dog Gone Wines and OWC Rascal Wines. Come on in, visit with Harris and get your dog’s portrait ordered — bring a photo (sorry, no four-legged friends allowed in the store).

COURTESY OREGON MARKETPLACE

Dean Crouser’s painting of a hummingbird in a nest

COURTESY OREGON MARKETPLACE

A dog portrait by Ronni Harris

the shop on the 11th will be donated to the Cannon Beach Library. Oregon Marketplace (2480 S. Roosevelt Drive) is open 10 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. daily, closed in January and February.

ELLY CONDIT PHOTO

Ronni Harris

COURTESY OREGON MARKETPLACE

Oregon artist Dean Crouser

Dean Crouser

Oregon Marketplace is thrilled to have Oregon artist, Dean Crouser, in the shop noon to 2 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 11. Crouser was born and raised in Oregon and his love of fishing, camping and the outdoors can be found in his art. His childhood summers were spent camping and fishing on the foothills of Mt. Hood, Columbia River Gorge and Central Oregon High Lakes. “I am always striving to say the most with the least and like to keep my work loose and spontaneous.” Get an autograph, view some originals and give to a good cause. Ten percent of Dean Crouser’s sales in

x1EOMediaFiller - Page 1 - Composite

The most valuable and respected source of local news, advertising and information for our communities.

eomediagroup.com

240 11TH STREET ASTORIA, OR 97103

NOW OPEN FOR LUNCH 11am-4pm Tuesday-Saturday

carruthers 1198 Commercial Street Astoria, Oregon 97103 503.975.5305

Happy Hour

Tuesday-Friday 4pm-6pm and 8:30-Close

Open 7am Daily!

REFORMATION ORMAT A ION 500 EV AT EVENT Sponsored ELCA Oregon Synod Columbia Coast Cluster

Saturday, November 4

2:00 pm worship

Peace Lutheran Church

565 12th Street

Astoria

with Bishop David Bauer-Rieke preaching An offering designated for Hope House will be taken during worship service.

3:20 pm: breakout session about MUSIC & ART of the Reformation 3:40 pm: family/children activities 5:00 pm dinner: $10 per person or $25 per family. Make checks payable to First Lutheran and write Reformation Dinner in memo area on your check. Held at Peace Lutheran Church 565 12th Street Astoria

SERVING BREAKFAST, LUNCH & SUPPER European Style Coffeehouse by day, intimate bistro offering neo-regional cuisine by night. Regional selection of beers, wines and vintage cocktails available. We cater your event!

Weekly Specials: 5-8 PM Sushi & Martinis Mondays Taco & Margarita Thursdays (3 Buck Tacos)

243 11th Street, Astoria, OR 97103 503-325-1787

www.AstoriaCoffeeHouse.com Follow & “Like” us on Facebook

22 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

“Sam!” Ben called once more, but then Sam was there in his pajamas, rubbing his eye. “What is it?” he asked sleepily. “What’s going on?” “Alright, Sam,” Ben squared him by the shoulders, “I need you to listen to me. It’s back. Somehow … it found us.” “What?” “Just … ” Ben scrambled. “Here, help me with this.” They flipped over the kitchen table so that it blocked the soiled picture window where Ben had first seen the creature. They pushed a couch against the table that Ben had already levied against the front door as the creature continued to pound. Then it stopped, and the rain swelled in Ben’s ears. He looked around wildly. There were too many entry points to secure. He settled on the basement door. He remembered seeing a hammer in one of the built-ins filled with machine parts and used it to shuck the deadbolt from the jam. The ancient air that puffed from the basement musked with the sharp stench he’d been ignoring since Thursday, and as he coughed he had the sensation of opening an Egyptian tomb. He blindly searched the wall until he found the light, then grabbed a kitchen knife and Sam’s hand, and made down the stairs. Surprisingly, the basement had been finished before it had become undone. It was arranged as a studio apartment, a bachelor pad. With a kitchenette, Murphy bed cocked against a wall and flannels hangered on a pole above a few pairs of dusty boots, it was obvious that someone had lived here. Beneath the cobwebs, the furniture was about ten years out of style. There was a large saw blade hoisted onto one of the cinder-block walls. A vibrating mass of fruit flies hovered over a heaping pile of bloodied bandage scraps. On an end table, Ben found a framed photo of a younger Earl Sloane embracing a woman he had never seen and a boy he didn’t know. Oh Earl, Ben thought, what have you done? This is Earl Sloane’s house. This is Billy Sloane’s room. He is always looking for a ride home. Sam shuddered as they heard glass breaking upstairs. They stacked the staircase with what little furniture was around, then slid the mattress off the Murphy bed as a final act of barricade. They heard the kitchen table effortlessly slap against the basement’s ceiling, then heavy footsteps squirting creeks off the floorboards. “I’m scared, Dad,” Sam whispered. “I know you are, buddy,” Ben said. “I love you, and you need to know that Earl was wrong. That thing is his son, but it’s not a ghost. It breathes. Which means it’s alive. And that means we can kill it.” Ben clutched the knife in his slick palm,

to say if he would even be alive right now to lunge at this demon, or to have met Jessica, or to have sprouted first Audrey and then Sam into his life, or to have held his son’s cheek after he gave an eye, or to bury his wife. What became clear in his first moment of combat is that he could have used some training mano a mano as the creature backhanded him cold before he could even jut the knife into its breast. He went dark across the carpet, his vision blurring on a pair of boots. •••

fretting if this wobbly Goodwill find would do much to anything larger than a spider. The footsteps paused before the threshold of the basement door. Ben could hear only the faintest trickle of rain over Sam’s Lamaze. Then, the door batted open with such force that it rebounded, slamming shut again, only to volley open once more, slowly this time on a nasal hinge. Ben could now hear the creature moaning like it meant something. Just one push sent the barricading furniture cascading down the stairwell like dominos and Ben and Sam had to retreat against the cinder block to avoid being crushed by so much plaid. Ben saw one boot emerge on the stairs, then another. The creature’s stench worked as a force field, leading Ben and Sam to choke on their tongues as its sour aura spread throughout the room.

As it reached the bottom of the stairs, Ben realized he had never seen it lit. It stood on the carpet, dripping, as Ben covered Sam’s one good eye. Its bandages wept darker than he had expected, percolating with muck and debris, as if the wrappings were the only thing holding this abomination together. If that were the case, it should make it easier to spill this thing. “Okay, Sam,” Ben whispered. “Like we talked about. Hide.” As Sam scurried into the closet, Ben stood, knife in hand, wondering how each separate failure in his life had led him to this moment. The creature’s eyes were rimmed with red honey. This was it, he told himself. Ben Driscoll hadn’t served in Vietnam. He had been born three months early enough to slip the draft. He had always crossed this off as a blessing. And it’s hard

He will not remember dragging the boy in the pajamas from the closet, but he does know this room. The boy will shake and whimper as he notices the man on the ground. The man on the ground will not move but to breathe. He will not understand why these people are in his room. He will never know how he got here. He will not recall the boy standing up to face him. “Hey,” the boy will say. “Hey! Look at me!” He will follow the boy’s volume the way a moth tends a lantern. “Look!” the boy will say, peeling back the patch on his face to reveal a pale crater of socket. “Look! I am a monster just like you.” He will peer sideways at the loud boy. “This isn’t where you live anymore,” the boy in the pajamas will say. “Let me take you home.” He will not remember the boy extending his hand and leading him out of the basement. He will stop four times as the boy drags him through the cold, wet rain as they approach an old wooden house up the block. He remembers cleaning this house as a teenager. Who is this boy leading him up the steps to the porch? The boy will knock three times on the door. He will not understand what they are waiting for. Yet he will recognize his own father opening the door, though he’s older, and more crooked slumping against the gun. “Oh my,” his dad will say. “What’s all this?” “He’s alive,” the boy will say. “Don’t you see? He’s breathing. He has always been alive.” His father’s face will fall into limp disbelief. His dad will take his free hand and set it over his soggy heart just to know that it beats. “Well, come in,” he will say. “Come in.” There will be a fire burning and the room will squeak underfoot. He will get hungry when he sees the dog even as the boy drops to his knees and calls it King. His father will direct him away from the dog with one hand on his chin. He will not remember meeting his eyes.

ow “I’m so sorry, Billy,” he will say. “I es- thought you were a ghost. I had no idea nd that all this time . . . ” is By the hearth, he will not remember the bury cold or his father’s words. mo- “Stay put,” his father will tell the boy. sed “Be with your dog. I need to put Billy to ture bed.” ven He will follow his father farther into the rk cavernous house. He relies heavily on the a stiffness of the gun to guide the shuffle of his limp. “When was the last time you slept in a warm bed?” his father will ask. He won’t know. In the room, his father will shed him he of his wet clothes and he will realize for e maybe the first time that he is completely the wrapped. He will put on the pajamas his t father gives him and climb beneath the blankets on the bed. He will know this is it. . He Home. His father will extinguish the lights and p sit at the edge of the bed. ey! “You are home now, Billy,” he will say. “I’m so sorry I avoided you all these years. I love you, son.” he His father will gently wipe his hand of across his soaked, bandaged brow before you.”replacing the hand with the cool barrel of y. the shotgun. ” the He will try to speak, but will not know if ke the words emerge. His father will hush him with soft coos. He will not remember the d- discharge of the round, or even the boy, if only to wonder if the boy’s back will snap e tight at the recoil. in as What he had wanted to say was thank the you. Thank you, Daddy. se as ••• teps Ben Driscoll woke up to a real discomnd fort for the second time that day. Splayed across the carpet, he opened his eyes to oor, discover a cantaloupe growing on his ump- forehead. Sniffing the lingering rotten scent in the air first tugged Sam back to his foggy all mind. Sam! There were new signs of a struggle in the basement and after checking ’t all of the rooms and closets he burst out s through the broken window into the storm, wondering what to do besides get wet. isThere was not a light pitched at the other nd Sloane place. He started towards it anythat way, but then stopped and spun, searching the inky darkness for any signs of life, but e found only fake phantoms evaporating as soon as his eyes adjusted. He could not lose Sam, too, not like this. In his rush, he t hadn’t even grabbed his jacket. Already e bone-soaked in a flannel shirt and jeans, . how long could he really expect to make it e out here concussing, a fruit blistering on his not brow? He knew two places that thing liked

NOVEMBER 2, 2017 // 23

to frequent and he was standing in one of them alone. So he got in the Satellite and began to slowly orbit the washed-out roads, ready to pick up a few hitchhikers. Maybe it was the petulant rain, or the fact that he didn’t know the area, or the dull wonk increasingly enflaming upon his brain, but he couldn’t find the highway before he ran out of gas. He could see the headlights about half a klick to his right, through about 1,000 pounds of rain and a nebulous squiggle of forest. Ben tossed on the emergency lights, closed his eyes and smacked his head against the horn, letting it blast, muted, into the storm, till the battery died alongside most of him. “I’m sorry,” he told the steering wheel, but it couldn’t answer. “Jessica,” he said. “We’re lost.” ••• She was parked in a truck with a boy as the rain trotted against the roof with enough force to imagine they were being socked by a trillion dollars worth of pennies. Jessie and Audrey sat at opposite sides of the cab, perforated by the knob of the manual transmission, but the Suzy A. in her felt as though they might as well have been on opposite sides of a middle school gym. They were parked miles north of Hug Point, even farther away from Tongue Point. She wondered when he would make a move, and if he did, would Suzy A. dig it like a grave? Outside the cab, the darkness glossed like onyx as they listened to a Top 40 station. She could see headlights blinking on the highway through a grove of trees behind them, and heard a horn roll long off in the distance. “So, is this pretty much what you do around here for fun?” she asked. “Yeah,” Jessie said, his tone less excited than rain. “Pretty much. I was supposed to take Kevin up to Seaside tonight to see this girl he knows and drag the gut, but I wanted to hang out with you instead. He’s kind of pissed.” “What’s dragging a gut?” “You know,” he said, “like cruising around.” “Cool,” she said. “What do you for fun in Spokane?” he asked. “Same,” she lied. “Cool,” he said. “So. Where are we exactly?” “You mean, like, in our relationship?” “No!” Audrey laughed. “No! I mean, like, are we still in Cannon Beach?” “Oh,” Jessie said, flipping the bulk of his sandy hair so that it smothered the left hemisphere of his brain. “Yeah. Still Cannon Beach. You know, they call this Bandage Man Road. So there’s like this

dead logger all wrapped up like a mummy who jumps into the back of kids’ trucks when they’re making out—” “I’ve seen him,” Audrey said flatly, buckling her own knees as Suzy A. sailed away and Audrey remembered the monster’s toxic spark, the eek of its palm as it smeared the window. “Why would you bring me here?” Somewhere beyond the heavy rain, the continuing drone of the car horn wailed like a cosmic moan. “You’ve seen him? Like the real Bandage Man?” Jessie said skeptically. “It’s like everybody knows about him, but nobody’s seen him. He’s just a story, babe. Something parents came up with to stop kids necking out here.” “I think I need to go home,” Audrey said, switching the radio from FM to AM. “Archibald Cox, the special prosecutor looking into the burglary at the Democratic National Committee’s offices at the Watergate Hotel, has been fired. President Nixon accepted the resignation of his attorney general and . . . ” “You’re, like, following this stuff?” Jessie said. “I find it soothing,” Audrey said, looking out the window. “You hear that, right?” As soon as she spoke, the car horn vanished and every decibel it released filled with rain. Jessie shrugged, switching the radio back to FM to find Springsteen Dylan-ing through a verse of “Blinded by the Light.” As Jessie faced Audrey, the weight of the cab slunk to the rear and Audrey could hear boots in the bed of the pickup truck. Then one bandaged palm clapped against the rear window of the cab. “Holy,” was all Jessie could say as he spun into the empty road in reverse. There are many different dimensions of chaos. With the rain slapping against the windshield, the road curved and slick, Jessie puffing a cloud of curses as he slammed the gas, jittering the creature in the bed of the truck, Audrey felt as if they were traveling through each of them. She had to snuff a breath for 30 seconds to realize it was the creature screaming in the bed of the truck and not her. It didn’t fume rotten like a carcass; it hadn’t even given ink to the window. Instead, it swam through the Chevy’s bed, trying desperately to fix its gauzy grip to the side of the truck. Its eyes were blue, not rimmed with red. It called Jessie by name. This was not the thing she had faced before. Looking closer, she recognized the packaged boy. “Jessie?” she asked. “Is that Kevin?” Jessie snaked his eye to the rear window as they sluiced through the darkness. When

his foot gave off the gas as he nodded to his old friend playing a practical joke, Audrey screamed at the dead station wagon in the road. “Hold on, Suzy!” Jessie said, flooring the break, as Kevin launched out of the bed of the truck directly towards the station wagon ahead of them. She grasped at her name, seeing her father rise up above the steering wheel of the stalled station wagon while an airborne teenage mummy approached his windshield like a one-hundred-and-sixty-pound mosquito. The bumpers of the cars kissed before each vehicle flailed backwards on impact, shooting human shrapnel into the air. ••• He will not understand why they are wrapping his face even as the bandages soak through. When he tries to speak, the paramedics will look at him cross-eyed. “Just calm down, buddy,” one of them will say, patting his chest, enlivening a wound. He will fury at them, unsure of the collision that splattered his mind. Who will he be? He will yank the IV from his arm and strike one of them across the face before tumbling out of the ambulance into the cold rain. The rain will wake him like it is morning. He will remember Audrey and Sam and Jessica as the light approaches. An orange light will sit bulbous in the sky. He will run at it, thinking he can launch into a harvest moon, and see her again, and again, and again, forever. ••• That rainy evening would splash infamous as “The Saturday Night Massacre,” not because of what happened to Audrey, Ben and Kevin on a lonely road nicknamed after a monster in Cannon Beach, Oregon, but because nearly 3,000 miles away, in Washington, D.C., President Richard Nixon accepted the resignations of his attorney general and deputy attorney general just to find a guy who goes by Bob Bork, who would lob off a special prosecutor named Archie Cox. The girl — who the only survivor of the crash, the driver, Jessie Travers, would mark as Suzy A., of Spokane — was stacked in the morgue as a Jane Doe, having no fingerprints or dental records on file. There was no money found in the well of the Satellite. Yet, a few months later, residents would begin to notice massive repairs to the house at the end of Carronade Lane. Contractors, who worked the job, will still tell you stories about the boy with the eyepatch holding the dog, who would stare out the upstairs window every foggy evening as if he was waiting for someone. CW

24 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

. . . s n e p p a h Life

! e r e h e r ’ e w That’s why

Keith Klatt, MD

Express Healthcare for Busy Lifestyles

Sally Baker, PA-C

Mark Tabor, PA-C

Our friendly and dedicated Physicians and Physician Assistants are available for all of your routine healthcare needs, not just for emergency situations! If you’re suffering from a headache, toothache, earache, backache, any illness or injury, are in need of a refill of your prescription medications, or even a sports physical or DOT physical, our dedicated staff is here to assist you! We are open 7 days a week from 9:00am to 7:00pm. We are located in the Park Medical Building East on Exchange Street. We accept most insurances, offer a cash discount and also accept the Oregon Health Plan and Medicare.

Kenyon Solecki, PA-C

Appontments are gladly accepted!

www.urgentcarenwastoria.com

We observe the following holidays & are closed on July 4th, Thanksgiving, Christmas & New Year’s Day.

Hours: Everyday 9AM-7PM

2120 Exchange Street, Suite 111 Astoria, Oregon

503-325-0333