Coast Weekend October 26, 2017

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Every Thursday Oct. 26, 2017 • coastweekend.com

BEWARE THE BANDAGE MAN: PART I A NORTH COAST HORROR STORY PAGE 10

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TALK IDE IN TOM BSTO G BR IN NE D E A GS TH E S D TO L BACK IFE


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Get your feet wet at watercoloring class GEARHART — Trail’s End Art Association and Gallery in Gearhart will hold a beginning watercolor class in January taught by Astoria artist Debbie Loyd. The class runs 9 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. Saturday, Jan. 6, and continues four more Saturdays through Feb. 3. The gallery is located at 656 A St., just south of Pacific Way. The cost is

$180. To register, contact linlu11@hotmail.com. Over 20 years, Loyd has won local and national awards by creating passionate works of many subjects, but she particularly enjoys portraits. A fellow artist taught her that “art is an expression of reality as seen through the artist’s personality.” Another favorite

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quote: “It is an artist’s job to find order in life and leave a record of what interested him, not what he thinks he ought to be interested in.” Trail’s End Art Association and Gallery is the oldest gallery on the North Coast. It has been running as a gallery since the early 1950s but was once “the little red schoolhouse” from the early 20th century. The association

welcomes artists beginning and accomplished, and offers such benefits as exhibiting art pieces monthly, discounts on purchases, entrance into an annual juried art show and daily open studios. To contact the gallery, call 503-717-9458 or email trailsendartassociation@gmail.com. Winter hours are 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Wednesday through Sunday.

Come Trick-or-Treat at Clatsop Care! The residents of Clatsop Care will be passing out treats from 3-5pm on Halloween Day. Please stop in and see us!

646 16th Street, Astoria

Mon-Fri, 8am-5pm 389 NW 13th St. Warrenton

Clatsop Retirement Village is the place to trick-and-treat With many friendly faces and bowls of candies sweet Young children are invited to travel from floor to floor And places to visit will be marked clearly on each door No need to fret about the traffic or the weather Traveling about the CRV building is warmer, drier, and safer Little Goblins are welcomed from six until eight It will be lots of fun! Don’t come late! 6–8pm HALLOWEEN

974 Olney Ave. Astoria

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A Debbie Loyd original

A painting by Debbie Lloyd

happenings


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 3

There’s ‘Something Happening Here’: an art show, auction ILWACO, WASH. — The Columbia Pacific Heritage Museum will hold its eighth annual 6x6 (6-inch-by-6inch) Art Show and Auction on Saturday, Nov. 4. This year’s event, “Something Happening Here,” has gathered more than 60 art objects from some of the region’s most talented artists. The theme for this year’s auction is inspired by the special exhibition “Flashback: Remembering the 1960s.” “From music to social justice protests, the 1960s continue to inspire creative expression,” Museum Director Betsy Millard said. The pieces will be

coast

SUBMITTED PHOTOS

LEFT: Wally Mann’s “Peace & Love All Travel On 101” RIGHT: Karen Snyder’s “My Mondrian”

available to view in the museum’s special exhibition gallery Friday, Oct. 27, until the Nov. 4 event. They can also be seen at colum-

weekend INSIDE THIS ISSUE

arts & entertainment

4 9 10

COASTAL LIFE

Spirited storytelling

Talking Tombstones resurrects the dead

THE ARTS

Harvest Moon Artisan Market Students prepare for poetry gathering in Nevada

FEATURE

‘Beware the Bandage Man: Part I’

DINING

Mouth of the Columbia

Hong Kong Restaurant due for spring cleaning

FURTHER ENJOYMENT SEE + DO ........................... 12, 13 CROSSWORD ........................... 17 CW MARKETPLACE ......... 18, 19

CALENDAR COORDINATOR REBECCA HERREN CONTRIBUTORS HEATHER DOUGLAS WILLIAM HAM RYAN HUME KATHERINE LACAZE LYNETTE RAE McADAMS DYLAN TANNER

To advertise in Coast Weekend, call 503-325-3211 or contact your local sales representative. © 2017 COAST WEEKEND

TO SUBMIT AN ITEM

ILLUSTRATION BY DYLAN TANNER

MUSIC CALENDAR.....................5

COAST WEEKEND EDITOR ERICK BENGEL

New items for publication consideration must be submitted by 10 a.m. Tuesday, one week and two days before publication.

A North Coast horror story

14

biapacificheriatgemuseum. org. The silent and live auctions will take place 5 to 8 p.m. at the museum (115

Find it all online!

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S.E. Lake St.). The presiding auctioneer, Bruce Peterson, is both entertaining and knowledgeable about the artists and their works. The event is the largest fundraiser for the exhibition programs of the Columbia Pacific Heritage Museum and a great opportunity to get to know the local art scene, enjoy refreshments, take home a masterpiece and, most importantly, show support for the museum. Tickets for the auction are available at the museum for $15 each. Fifty raffle tickets are available for $20 each. The winner will have the pick of any 6x6 prior to the auction.

“Tea Caddy With Obsidian Top” by David Campiche


4 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

SPIRITED STORYTELLING

‘Talking Tombstones XIV: Over My Dead Body’ brings the dead back to life

“I really enjoyed that character,” Hens-

By HEATHER DOUGLAS FOR COAST WEEKEND

T

he spirits of dearly departed locals will rise for an afternoon of fun history during the 14th annual “Talking Tombstones,” presented by the Clatsop County Historical Society. The free event takes place 1 to 4 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 29, at Greenwood Cemetery (91569 State Highway 202) in Astoria. The Historical Society recruits talented community members to prepare vignettes of ten characters each year. The actors stand by the gravestone of the person they have preparation, that person will be brought back to life in front of small groups who rotate through the cemetery. “One thing I love about this program is that cemeteries are filled with people, and those people have stories; unless you make a point of telling these stories they will be forgotten,” said McAndrew Burns, the Historical Society’s executive director. “It’s a way to remind people.”

From Kansas to Astoria

Burns was inspired to create Talking Tombstones after stopping in the small town of Caldwell, Kansas, years ago and witnessing a group of locals give a similar performance. “A lot of small towns do variations on this concept. There was no reason to stop in this little town except for their cemetery program,” Burns said. “It was just an amazing way to bring history to life.” Once upon a time, cemeteries did not hold the same cryptic power they do now. They were parks for picnicking and visiting loved ones. It was a place of remembrance, rather than a place where ghosts were imag-

David Reid — the lead adviser at the Clatsop Community College — has participated in Talking Tombstones for 11 years. “You have to make it interesting,” Reid said of historical interpretation, “but some-

Reid’s performances have run the gamut, he said. “You have to imagine a person’s whole life distilled down into a five-minute talk,”

PHOTOS BY JOSHUA BESSEX

ABOVE: David Reid portrays a character from Clatsop County’s past at Talking Tombstones in 2015. TOP: The Grim Reaper made a special guest appearance at the 2015 Talking Tombstones, held at Warrenton’s Clatsop Plains Pioneer Cemetery.

ined to haunt or terrorize. Burns remembered that, “after we did our first Talking Tombstones, we got lots of letters and emails. One said: ‘I walk my dog through the cemetery every day and have never thought to stop and read the stones; now I read them and try to get a picture of who that person might have been.’”

Stars of the show

Matt Hensley, a history teacher of 30 years and one of the founders of Seaside Salt Works, has been a key player in Talking Tombstones since the first event was held at Hilltop Cemetery in Astoria in 2004. Hensley’s first character was a scoundrel lawyer from the 1900s who cheated

fishermen out of money and was eventually gunned down by a disgruntled fisherman. “We have some interesting folks in Astoria’s history,” Hensley said, laughing. “I also once portrayed a man that everyone thought murdered his first wife so that he could marry her sister.” Another unforgettable character Hensley portrayed was a Clatsop County deputy sheriff from the early 1900s. The man accompanied the sheriff to arrest a man in Seaside who had committed some crimes, and when the man answered the door to find the sheriff and deputy outside, a gun was pulled. The deputy stepped in front of the sheriff attempting to save his life. Both sheriff and deputy were killed in the line of duty.

back and the good feedback from people. I’m not an actor, but I get to play an actor for a few hours on Sunday afternoon once

Spirits in waiting

Repeat attendance at Talking Tombstones has become the norm. One question Burns asks at the beginning of each event: How many of you have come before? “Invariably over half of the hands go up,” he said. When it’s time again to plan next year’s event, Burns and his team begin another round of research. “We usually start with a murder victim, a prostitute and a grieving mother, and go from there,” he quipped. Hensley, in fact, is already thinking about next year. “Mac showed me a flat stone grave marker in a cemetery last year that said ‘bear hunter extraordinaire.’ If we go back to that cemetery again someday, I told him this is the person I want to portray next.” CW


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 5

IN THE COLUMBIA-PACIFIC REGION Thursday, Oct. 26 Sugar Thistle 5 p.m., The Bistro, 263 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2661. Sugar Thistle plays Americana and original tunes. Jackson Andrews 6 p.m., Sweet Basil’s Café, 271 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1539, no cover, 21+. Jackson Andrews plays original songs and arrangements of folk, country and popular tunes. Basin Street NW 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Dave Drury on guitar, Todd Pederson on bass and friends perform mainstream jazz classics. Senior Center Jam 6:30 p.m., Astoria Senior Center, 1111 Exchange St., Astoria, 503-468-0390. The Astoria Senior Center offers string band, bluegrass and country. Floating Glass Balls 8 p.m., Bill’s Tavern, 188 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2202, no cover. The Floating Glass Balls plays bluegrass, Caribbean, folk, swing and country. Pretty Gritty 8 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Blaine Heinonen and Sarah Wolff of Pretty Gritty play elements of country, rock, blues and soul.

Friday, Oct. 27 Thistle & Rose 6 p.m., Seasons Café, 255 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1159. Thistle and Rose play folk, Americana and bluegrass music from the 70s and 80s, and original tunes. Wes Wahrmund 6 p.m., The Bistro, 263 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2661. Wes Wahrmund’s classical guitar skills amaze with light jazz and original tunes.

PRESENTS

Jennifer Goodenberger 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Jennifer Goodenberger plays new age,

folk and original music in styles from classical and contemporary to improvisational and contemplative piano.

Astoria, $8. Music features indie and experimental pop with the Nurses and Holiday Friends.

Maggie & the Kats 6:30 p.m., Sweet Basil’s Café, 271 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1539, no cover, 21+. Maggie & the Kats play New Orleans gumbo blues, soul and rhythm-n-blues.

Rebecca Hardiman 8:30 p.m., Carruthers, 1198 Commercial St., Astoria. True lovers of jazz will recognize Rebecca Hardiman as authentic to the world of vocal jazz.

Cedar Teeth 7 p.m., McMenamins Sand Trap, 1157 Marion Ave., Gearhart, 503-717-8150, no cover. Cedar Teeth blends rough and rusty rock-n-roll with lyrical American roots music. Celtic Harps 7 p.m., Performing Arts Center, 588 16th St., Astoria, $15. The concert features Lisa Lynne and Aryeh Frankfurter playing traditional instrumental music from Sweden and Ireland and original compositions blended with stories of humor and adventure. Count Valters 7 p.m., River City Playhouse, 127 Lake St., Ilwaco, Wash. Peninsula Players presents a special Halloween rock-nroll concert with Count Valters and the Zombie Band; come in costume, or not, for a fun evening.

Pretty Gritty 9 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Blaine Heinonen and Sarah Wolff of Pretty Gritty play elements of country, rock, blues and soul.

Saturday, Oct. 28 Boo’s, Blues & Brews 5 p.m., Elks Lodge, 324 Avenue A, Seaside, $5 to $25. Live music features Redwood Son, the Ted Vaughn Blues Band and Blitzen Trapper. Bobcat Rice 6 p.m., Seasons Café, 255 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1159. Bobcat Rice weaves his lead guitar around a mix of blues and classic tunes

John Orr 7 p.m., WineKraft, 80 10th St., Astoria, 503-468-0206, no cover, 21+. Guitarist John Orr plays southern blues, jazz and folk music.

George Coleman 6 p.m., Shelburne Inn Restaurant, 4415 Pacific Way, Seaview, Wash., 360-642-4150, no cover. George Coleman offers a repertoire mix of old familiar favorites and classical selections on his 12-string guitar.

Smith & Jaime 7 p.m., North Beach Tavern, 102 Pioneer Road, Longbeach, Wash., 360-642-2302, no cover. An evening of original Texas roadhouse rock with acoustic duo Bruce Smith and Roger Jaime.

David Drury 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Guitarist David Drury plays contemporary, classic and traditional jazz standards.

Dala 7:30 p.m., Columbia Theatre, 1231 Vandercook Way, Longview, Wash., 360-575-8499, $40. Enter through the stage door for an intimate concert with folk music singers Amanda Walther and Sheila Carabine, limited seating, light hors d’oeuvres and no host bar.

Maggie & the Kats 6:30 p.m., Sweet Basil’s Café, 271 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503436-1539, no cover, 21+. Maggie & the Kats play New Orleans gumbo blues, soul and rhythm-n-blues.

Music at the Armory 8 p.m., The Armory, 1636 Exchange St.,

Barbie G 7 p.m., WineKraft, 80 10th St., Astoria, 503-468-0206, no cover, 21+. Barbie G plays acoustic folk music.

MORE MUSIC coastweekend.com/ cw/music

Brownsmead Flats 7 p.m., Hoffman Center, 594 Laneda Ave., Manzanita, 503-368-3846, $10. Brownsmead Flats plays a blend of old-time, folk and bluegrass music with a maritime flavor, accompanied by vocal harmonies and acoustic instruments. The Strange Tones 7 p.m., McMenamins Sand Trap, 1157 Marion Ave., Gearhart, 503-717-8150, no cover. Drawing from the influences of blues, rockabilly, surf and vintage rhythm-n-blues, The Strange Tones’ Crime-a-Billy music is a sound and style all their own. Catarina New 7:30 p.m., Liberty Theater, 1203 Commercial St., Astoria, 503-325-5922, $16. Catarina New Jazz Quartet play avant-garde jazz, big band, rhythmn-blues, Latin rhythms and inspired instrumental lyricism. Thunder Road 7:30 p.m., American Legion, 1315 Broadway, Seaside, 503-738-5111, 21+. Thunder Road Band plays country, classic rock and blues covers. Little Sue 8 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Little Sue plays pop, country, folk, rock and show tunes. Moonshiner’s Ball 8 p.m., Pitchwood Inn, 425 3rd St., Raymond, Wash., 360-942-5313, $15, 21+. Marv Ellis & The We Tribe plus DJ Pete Bitty combine musical forces for a Halloween extravaganza at the sixth annual Moonshiner’s Halloween Ball; prizes for best costumes. Music at the Armory 8 p.m., The Armory, 1636 Exchange St., Astoria, $5 to $8. Music features heavy metal with Diesto, Sol, Worws and C Average. Rebecca Hardiman 8:30 p.m., Carruthers, 1198 Commercial St., Astoria. True lovers of jazz will recognize Rebecca Hardiman as authentic to the world of vocal jazz.

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Matt Hopper and the Roman Candles

Sunday, Oct. 29 Matt Hopper 8 p.m., Fort George Brewery, 1483 Duane St., Astoria, 503-325-7468, no cover. Matt Hopper plays indie pop and rock-n-roll music.

Sunday, Oct. 29 Richard T. & Friends 11:30 a.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Richard T. and friends performs a repertoire of blues. NC Symphonic Band 2 p.m., Liberty Theater, 1203 Commercial St., Astoria, 503-325-5922, $15. North Coast Symphonic Band opens its 38th season with “Postcards from Europe” performing conductor Dave Becker’s favorite musical selections from his tours in Europe.

Continued on Page 17

BLITZEN TRAPPER • LIVE IN CONCERT Ted Vaughn Blues Band • Redwood Son OCTOBER 28TH • DOORS OPEN

AT

5PM • TICKETS $10

On Stage at the Elks’s Lodge in downtown Seaside as part of the SDDA’s Boo’s Blues and Brews Halloween Happenings!

Arrive in costume and bring two cans of food for the Seaside Pantry and get in for $5! Listen to the Bridge and Win VIP tickets • www.949thebridge.com


6 // COASTWEEKEND.COM Visual arts, literature, theater, music & more

POEMS ON THE RANGE Harvest Moon Artisan Market funds student adventure to Nevada poetry gathering By WILLIAM HAM FOR COAST WEEKEND

E

very three years or so for the last 20, Mark Mizell, an English teacher at Seaside High School, gathers up a couple dozen of his charges for a unique expedition. “We take a beautiful yellow school bus over to Portland, hop on a train, take it to Sacramento, walk around town a bit, then take another train through the Sierras and the Great Basin Desert up to our destination,” he said. That destination: Elko, Nevada, which has hosted the annual National Cowboy Poetry Gathering every January since 1985. Described by organizers as “six days of poetry, music, dancing, workshops, exhibits, conversations, food and fellowship,” the Gathering began as an opportunity for Western ranchers and cowboys to share poems about their lives on the range. (Think FisherPoets, only dustier.) With 25 students and several chaperones in tow, this will not be an inexpensive jaunt. To offset costs, Mizell and his kids have organized the first-ever Harvest Moon Artisan Market, which will take place in the gymnasium of the Broadway Middle School (1120 Broadway St.) 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 28, and 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 29. Between 25 and 30 vendors — local artists, chefs, and musicians among them — are scheduled to participate. Mizell and his wife, Becky, have worked alongside many of them while manning their own stalls at the Astoria Sunday Market and the Saturday Market in Ilwaco over the last 20 summers.

Students pull shifts

“I’ve known Mark and Becky for quite a few years now,” said vendor Leslie McCray, whose own business, Sweater Heads, does what the name implies: She fashions stylish headwear from a variety of castoff pullovers. “We’ve worked together at a number of different markets in the area, selling our art.

PHOTO BY ERICK BENGEL

Mark Mizell, an English teacher at Seaside High School, at a beatnik poetry reading in 2015

SWEATERHEADS.NET

Leslie McCray, owner of Sweater Heads, will be a vendor at the Harvest Moon Artisan Market.

He’s done fundraising for these trips in other ways over the years, and this year he decided to give this a try, since this is what we do.” Each vendor pays a $70 admission fee, every penny of which will help defray the students’ travel expenses. Mizell has ensured his students are part of the process. “Everybody gets to take a shift,” he said. In the run-up to the market, Mizell’s kids can be found handing out fliers from Astoria to Cannon Beach, making signs, helping vendors and practicing a “mini-traveling show” called the “Let ’er Buck Chili Feed Revue,” which they hope to perform before

and during their trip, as well as at the Gathering. “I think the trip winds up being more meaningful for them the more they’re involved in the preliminary stages of it,” Mizell said.

A long tradition

All of this hard work and preparation, with the promise of a celebration at the end, is in keeping with the spirit of the National Cowboy Poetry Gathering. “Cowboys and cowgirls getting together like this is not a new thing,” Mizell said. “During the spring, summer and fall, ranchers tend to be quite busy, of course, so when there’s a lull in the winter, that’s their time to celebrate their life and their work, through storytelling, music and everything else. It’s part of a long tradition, and I’m proud to be able to share it.” The Gathering’s remit has grown exponentially, expanding to include writers and

performers of all stripes from throughout the American West and beyond. Performances from the likes of Ian Tyson (of 1960s folk duo Ian & Sylvia), Michael Martin Murphey (of “Wildfire” fame) and Grammy-winner Ramblin’ Jack Elliott are not uncommon. At the most recent Gathering attended by Mizell and his students, the keynote speaker was Temple Grandin, a world-renowned animal science professor and autism activist. In addition, the 34th Gathering, which runs Jan. 28 through Feb. 3, will focus on a less-heralded aspect of cowboy culture. This year’s theme: “Basques & Buckaroos.” “There’s a big Basque influence throughout the Great Basin region, from Utah and Idaho right through to eastern Oregon,” Mizell said. “In fact, you can go to Steens Mountain and still find carvings the original Basque sheep herders left in the aspen groves up there. It’ll be great to have that tradition represented at this year’s event.” CW


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 7

Astoria Jazz Festival makes debut at six venues ASTORIA — The first annual Astoria Jazz Festival takes place Friday through Sunday, Oct. 27 through 29, in six Astoria venues: KALA, Carruthers, Bridgewater Bistro, WineKraft, Inferno Lounge and Charlie’s Chop House. The festival is the mutual dream of Ron Craig, the founder of the Astoria International Film Festival, and Bruce M. Watts, an avid jazz lover. The featured performance will be Catarina New Quartet at KALA 7:30 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 28. Doors open at 7 p.m. Experience the soothing, charismatic rhythm of Catarina New, Portland Oregon’s Swedish jazz artist and saxophone and vocal sensation. Her fresh, inspired music

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Jazz vocalist Rebecca Hardiman

soothes the senses while feeding the soul. Tickets for this performance can be purchased at the Liberty Theatre online or at KALA the day of the show.

Other venues

Carruthers: Rebecca Hardiman 8:30 to 11 p.m. Friday and Saturday, Oct. 27 and 28.

Catarina New, a Swedish jazz musician from Portland

From the moment Hardiman walks on stage, her tone, sense of style, delivery and cheerfulness light up the room. True jazz lovers of jazz will recognize she is

authentic, a welcome asset to the world of vocal jazz. WineKraft: John Orr on Friday, Oct. 27; music and trivia with Barbie G on Saturday, Oct. 28; Kelsey Mousley on Sunday, Oct. 29. Bridgewater Bistro: Jennifer Goodenberger on Friday, Oct. 27; David Drury on Saturday, Oct. 28; Richard Thomasian and friends (brunch) Sunday, Oct. 29; Skadi (dinner) Oct. 29. Inferno Lounge: To be announced (check website) Charlie’s Chop House: To be announced (check website) For additional information, visit astoriajazzfestival. info or facebook.com/astoriajazzfestival.

Celtic harps, rare instruments, wondrous stories ASTORIA — A duo of Celtic harpists and multi-instrumentalists will perform a concert of rare instruments and stories — as well as offer a beginning hands-onharps workshop (with harps provided) — at Clatsop Community College’s Performing Arts Center. The concert takes place 7 p.m. Friday, Oct. 27. Admission is $15. The beginner’s harp workshop, for adults and children 8 and older, is 10 a.m. to noon Saturday, Oct. 28. A $25 donation will

Lisa Lynne, left, and Aryeh Frankfurter SUBMITTED PHOTO

reserve a Celtic harp. Reservations for the 15 available harps can be made at 503338-2369. The concert features Lisa Lynne and Aryeh Frankfurter playing two Celtic harps,

the rare Swedish nyckelharpa, Ukranian bandura, cittern, viola and more. The audience will hear traditional instrumental music from Sweden and Ireland, and original compositions blend-

ed with stories of humor and adventure. People can also attend the workshop as a listener and donate what they wish. Donations support “Harpsfor-Hearts,” which places interactive music programs in schools and hospitals throughout the West Coast. Lynne and Frankfurter hail from Oregon and share a background as progressive rock musicians. They tour extensively, playing fine performing arts centers, theaters and intimate venues around the U.S. and Europe.

Brownsmead Flats play ‘crabgrass’ in Manzanita MANZANITA — The Brownsmead Flats play at the Hoffman Center for the Arts (594 Laneda Ave.) 7 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 28. Admission is $10. The band plays acoustic music described as “crab-

grass,” a style they liken to folk and bluegrass with a maritime flavor. They sing with tight vocal harmonies, and the quintet plays a variety of acoustic instruments. Dan Sutherland is featured on hammered dulcimer, man-

dolin and fiddle. Ray Raihala picks banjo, guitar and mandolin. Larry Moore plays the mandolin. John Fenton is on bass and mandolin. And Ned Heavenrich plays harmonica and guitar. The Brownsmead Flats

create a fun-loving atmosphere where audiences are encouraged to sing along. The band’s versatility allows them to play music for all ages, and their shows are guaranteed to fill audiences with joy and mirth.

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The North Coast Symphonic Band at the Liberty Theatre

North Coast Symphonic Band opens 38th season at Astoria’s Liberty Theatre ASTORIA — The North Coast Symphonic Band will open its 38th season 2 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 29, at the Liberty Theatre. Doors open at 1:15 p.m. The Beach Buddies will present a preshow of light jazz starting at 1:30 p.m. Dave Becker, a former band director at Lewis and Clark College, returns as the Symphonic Band’s conductor and musical director. The afternoon’s program is titled “Postcards from Europe” and features Becker’s favorite wind band selections with a European theme. Selections include Bach’s “Prelude and Fugue in G minor” transcribed for band, and Mendelssohn’s “Overture for Band,” originally written for wind instruments. The Symphonic Band will perform “Les Papillons” (or “The Butterflies”) written by Coby Lankester and arranged by Dutch composer Johan de Meij. “Symphonic Dances from Fiddler on the Roof” references the many Jewish quarters in Eastern Europe. A historic battle in France inspired “Ayres of Agincourt.” “The March of the Belgian Parachutists” by Pierre Leemans comes from Belgium, and the “Knightsbridge March”

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Dave Becker, conductor and musical director of the North Coast Symphonic Band

from Eric Coates’ London Suite is a beloved tune in England. The Beach Buddies performs dance music of the Big Band Era through the 1980s, including classic rock and great swing tunes. Tickets are available at the Liberty box office (1203 Commercial St.) 2 to 5:30 p.m. Wednesday through Saturday and two hours before the performance. Regular admission is $15. Student tickets for those 18 and under are $7. For more information, visit libertyastoria.org. For more information on the Symphonic Band, visit northcoastsymphonicband. org, or find them on Facebook or call 503-325-2431.


8 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

What’s for Dessert Theatre? The dramedy ‘The Porch’ ASTORIA — Sex, comedy and heartbreak are the elements of the American Association of University Women’s production of “The Porch” by Jack Neary. Performances are held 7 p.m. Friday, Nov. 3, and 7 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 4. This year’s production has returned to its home: the Presbyterian Fellowship Hall, at the northeast corner of Harrison and 11th streets, with new handicapped access. This is AAUW’s annual Dessert Theatre Scholarship fundraiser. The two-act show takes place in Eastern Massachusetts during Labor Day Weekend 2004. It is a comedy; it is a drama. It is about people like you and people you know. All action occurs on a front porch. Five friends discuss everything: sex, sports, scandals, shared tragedies, love, enduring friendships, long marriages, family dynamics and historical events such as

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“The Porch” cast (from left): Slab (Robert) Slabinski, Meredith Reiley, Gigi Chadwick, Sheila Shaffer, Frank Jagodnik

the Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky liaison. Tickets are discounted Friday for $12, which includes homemade cookies. On Saturday, tickets are $15, which includes the reinstated famous Dessert Theatre (only on Saturday). Tickets are available from AAUW members and at the door. For more information, call 503-325-7969.

The play, directed by Susi Brown, stars Meri Reiley, Sheila Shaffer, Gigi Chadwick, Slab Slabinski and Frank Jagodnik. Neary’s plays have been produced in the U.S. and Canada. In 2006, his play “Jerry Finnegan’s Sister” toured France, and his romantic comedy “First Night” was produced off-Broadway.

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ALIENS INVADE CLATSKANIE!

Steve The Pretty Good casts a spell in Raymond

CLATSKANIE — The most notorious radio show in history, “The War of the Worlds,” will be performed 1 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 28, at the Birkenfeld Theatre in Clatskanie (75 S. Nehalem St.). The show will be done in classic 1938 radio style, including live sound effects. Written by Howard Koch (“Casablanca”), the program was originally broadcast on Orson Welles’ radio show, “The Mercury Theatre on the Air.” The Martian invasion was presented in such a realistic style that many listeners — who were already tense about the prospect of

RAYMOND, WASH. — Steve Hamilton brings his magic act to Raymond in two performances the weekend before Halloween — one for kids, another for adults — both held at the historic Raymond Theatre (323 Third St.). Steve The Pretty Good, as he’s known in magic, appears 7 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 28, in a family-friendly ‘Hocus Pocus’ event aimed at adults. Tickets are $10, payable at the door. Friends of the Raymond Theatre sponsors this event. Proceeds benefit the theater. Saturday’s event will

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An actor performs the radio broadcast of “The War of the Worlds”

war in Europe — thought it was real. The original performance is known as “the night that panicked

America.” Sponsored by the Clatskanie Arts Commission, this performance will be Stageworks Northwest Theatre’s first production in Clatskanie. Tickets are $15 for adults, $13 for seniors 60 and older and students, $10 for children. Buy tickets online at clatskaniearts.org or by calling 503-728-3403. The show will also be performed at Stageworks’ home theater in Longview, Washington. For more information about the Longview shows and the organization, visit stageworksnorthwest. org.

also feature “Goodies to Go,” namely, fall baked goods: cupcakes, pumpkin rolls, pumpkin breads, apple pies and more. Then, at 2 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 29, Steve brings kid-level comedy to a Sunday Afternoon Live for Youth event. Tickets are $5; children must bring a responsible adult. Kids can model their favorite Halloween costumes, too, during a costume contest at the event. Born in Canada, Hamilton’s family moved to Seattle, where he attended school, joined the Marine Corps, got married and had

two kids, became a firefighter/paramedic, then fell under the spell of comedy magic. He put together a small show and hit the streets as a busker, honing his sleight of hand and entertaining anyone who would stop to watch. Creating a larger show, he began performing at local fairs, eventually bringing his show across the country, even around the world. Friends of the Raymond Theatre is a new organization whose goal is to preserve, maintain and improve the theater by raising awareness and funds.


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 9

A HALLOWEEN NIGHT RIDE Hear spooky tales, eat candy aboard a haunted trolley By KATHERINE LACAZE FOR THE DAILY ASTORIAN

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he setting: the Astoria Riverfront Trolley. The time: 6:30 p.m. Halloween. Dressed in cobwebs and inhabited by ghosts, bats and skeletons, the trolley will take off near 17th Street — loaded with passengers and a conductor and driver in costume — and travel along the Astoria Riverwalk. Those who dare can join the thrilling one-hour night ride and hear spooky tales while indulging on candy. “We just have a blast with it,” said Paul Winiarz, a member of the trolley operations board. Originally, the complimentary Halloween Night Run was part of a larger tradition that included a Halloween bash at the Astoria Armory and a night of spooky movies, activities and food for families at Rogue Ales Public House. The trolley ride took place between festivities. When the Rogue discontinued the event, however, the trolley ride was already “such a ritual, we decided we would carry on,” Winiarz said.

‘Time to get theatrical’

One of the trolley operators, who had a knack for telling ghost stories, introduced storytelling into the Halloween Night Run. For the past two years, North Coast children’s author Melissa Eskue Ousley — who uses locations in and around Clatsop County as the backdrop for some of her work — took on the job of entertaining passengers as they traveled from 17th Street, near the Columbia River Maritime Museum, to 39th Street, then to the Riverwalk Inn and back. This year, the storytelling baton passes to Ilwaco, Washington, resident William Ham, a community theater actor, radio host at KMUN and Coast Weekend contributor, who anticipates using his experience to deliver a unique performance. “Halloween is always a great time to get theatrical and to do something off the beaten path,” he said. Entertaining the audience, pulling them into the spirit of the event, is what motivates him. “It’s nice to bring an audience along with whatever story you’re trying to tell,

PHOTO BY JOSHUA BESSEX

Costumed riders of all ages fill the Astoria Riverfront Trolley during the Halloween Night Run in 2015.

whether it’s a play or a reading or something along these lines,” he said. “It’s gratifying when you get an audience in the palm of your hand.” The unpredictability of a live performance aboard a haunted trolley may require a certain spontaneity. Ham sees this as part of the fun — and a way to bond with the crowd. A child-packed audience and the special setting also make the Halloween Night Run a rare opportunity for him. “That’s probably part of the reason I’m psyched about doing this, because it is a little bit different,” he said. “And kids, of course, are sometimes the best audience when you’re telling stories or performing. They are so open to things. You get them on your side, and they’ll follow you anywhere.” The crew decorates the trolley about a week before Halloween, so people who don’t take the Halloween ride can still see it decked out during a regular weekend ride.

A community courtesy

The Astoria Riverfront Trolley, a self-sustaining nonprofit, tries to offer free rides on Halloween — and, typically, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s as well — as a treat to local residents. Those are occasions when locals often have family and guests visiting from elsewhere, and they can experience Astoria in a way only accessible via the trolley. “It’s our way to give back to the community,” Winiarz said. The trolley, built in 1913 and fondly known as “Old 300,” is operated by about 40 certified conductors and motormen who are all volunteers. During the summer, it runs six hours a day, seven days per week, at $1 per ride. In the fall, the trolley usually operates on weekends, weather permitting. This year, Winiarz said, except for a few special events, the trolley will shut down for winter after Halloween for engine maintenance. Runs should resume in late February or early March. CW

SUBMITTED PHOTO

Operators combine their official uniforms with costumes to take the Astoria Riverfront Trolley out for its annual Halloween Night Run, a complimentary offering for the public.


10 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

A NORTH COAST HORROR STORY

BEWARE THE BANDAGE MAN: PART I Story by RYAN HUME Illustrations by DYLAN TANNER FOR COAST WEEKEND


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 11

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hey were tourists. That’s what he told the kids as they whipped through the dusk out of Portland into the foothills, the A.M. radio still dry-heaving the latest on Watergate and Vietnam through larger and larger chunks of static. He just needed a few days to figure out his next move — their next move — and what better place was there to think than the beach? “Don’t we have school tomorrow?” Audrey asked from the backseat in the kind of incredulous tone only natural to a 16-year-old girl. Well, Bonneville Dam it. He would have to call their schools in the morning. Did the cabin even have a phone? He really hadn’t thought this out. Ben Driscoll cinched a brand-new Parliament between his lips then punched the dash lighter a little too hard as he tried to smile into the rearview. Audrey caught him in the mirror, one brow raised and waiting. She had inherited her mother’s stink-eye; a practical heirloom from his deceased wife. Sam didn’t even look up from the book in his lap. With a flashlight cradled in his neck to illuminate the pages, Ben’s 12-year-old son looked older than his station. Bearded with shadow, the light playing off the wire-rimmed glasses that sat atop the eye-patch over his right eye, he looked like some kind of intellectual dwarf pirate minus the hat. Ben wondered, with his son’s sorry lot of late, if Sam raised his head for much of anything anymore. “What’s the matter, Odd?” Ben said to his daughter. “Don’t like it when your father goes groovy? Makes an impromptu plan?” “Ew,” his daughter said, visibly shuddering even in the dark of the station wagon. “You are so far from groovy you don’t even know how to use that word. Nobody goes groovy. Groovy is just … groovy.” Ben sighed and checked the gas gauge. The needle was still hovering around half a tank, thank God. With the gas stations in Portland recently shuttered behind their OUT OF GAS signs thanks to OPEC, he had had to abridge his getaway plan. His buddy Rex had rented a little place outside of Cannon Beach over the last summer and had passed along the info. After laying low for a few days, they would be reborn. Now he just had to figure out how to

tell the kids their old lives were dead. As they passed the summit, it began to rain in sheets. Ben had the sensation that they were driving underwater. Next time you commit grand larceny, genius, Ben said to himself, maybe don’t do it in October? Approaching U.S. 101, somehow the rain intensified. Ben could barely make out Sultan, their terrier mutt, whimpering in the rear of the vehicle, but Audrey was on it, turning around to comfort the dog. “Did you know that there’s supposed to be treasure buried on Neahkahnie Mountain?” Sam said. “It’s supposed to be haunted. Cursed. People who go looking don’t come back. Can we go?” “Yawn,” Audrey said. Ben thought about his own ill-begotten treasure. He had stuffed $15,000 into the spare-tire well of their Plymouth Satellite. Buried beneath suitcases, picture frames, bikes, and one muddy terrier lay their future, but oh how cursed did it already feel. Cancer doesn’t just dig one grave. It has enough gravity to sink whole clans. He had lost their house just to pay for losing his wife. Stuck in a two-bedroom with two kids, and then every morning on site there’s awful Marilyn Horn with her checkbook, erecting her family’s dream house one signature at a time. It takes quite a while to drive from North Portland to the West Hills. Lesser men get to thinking. By Monday Marilyn Horn would start asking about her lumber and she would find her foreman gone. “Let’s see what the weather has in store, buddy,” Ben said, “but a hike sounds like fun. This week is all about fun. In fact, I say we play a game. Have you guys ever wanted to be someone else?” “Only like every day of my life,” Audrey deadpanned. The rain went full riot, and for a moment there was no way to distinguish elk from tree, and Ben just had to swallow faith that 101 was still heading south in front of them. The full moon was no help. “Let’s pretend to be a different family,” he said. Sam turned off his flashlight and Ben tried to blink away every psychedelic color that throbbed at his peripheral. The station wagon’s roof kept

getting pummeled, and the emptiness of the passenger seat next to him had never felt so vast. “But I like being Sam Driscoll,” Sam said. “You sure about that, buddy?” Ben asked. An orange light flashed above the car, revealing the dark, flailing arms of the trees at the side of the road, but Ben could not tell what direction the light had come from as the rain and sky had bled into a single thing. Seemed too low to be a plane but Ben couldn’t be sure, and they hadn’t passed another car for miles, meaning they were the only ones stupid enough to be out here. Audrey was the first to see the stranger standing on the shoulder of the road. “Bad night to be hitchhiking,” Ben said matter-of-factly. “Aren’t you going to stop?” Audrey asked. “It’s pouring.” “We’re only going a few more miles,” Ben said. “Wouldn’t do them a lot of good.” “But I thought you were going groovy, Dad. Joining the revolution?” “Oh, for crissakes,” Ben muttered as he pumped the breaks and guided the Satellite toward the shoulder. “Dad,” Sam said. “What’s that smell?” Audrey asked. “Is there a beached whale around here? I think I’m going to barf.” Sultan began to growl. As Ben focused, he noticed that the figure in the rain hadn’t made a move toward the car. He wasn’t even looking in their direction but at the tree line instead. Sultan barked. “Dad,” Sam said. His arms were at his side. Had he even stuck his thumb out? “Dad!” Sam said more emphatically. He had no bag. No jacket. Just a soaked Pendleton plaid buttoned to his Adam’s apple, and something else . . . draping off his arms. Ben immediately thought of limp tentacles, as if this stranger were wearing a dead octopus like a shawl. He had no face. Was he wearing a mask? Ben thought he could see wet tufts of dark hair, an earlobe peeking through the covering. No, not a mask, but a wrapping, heavy with rain and soil and eclipsing his entire head. He was just eyes and a mouth embraced by gauze. “Dad!” Sam said. “Is that a mum-

my!?” Then, quick as a jolt of lightning, this thing was at the front passenger door, smacking the window and shivering the handle as it moaned in some sort of guttural cow dialect. Audrey screamed and Sultan barked incessantly. Had Ben remembered to lock the door? As perverse silver linings go, he realized that he had stopped unlocking that door after Jessica died. Ben peeled out onto the highway, but the thing persisted, running the length of the station wagon, and smearing the rear passenger-door window with a viscous liquid emitted from its bandaged palm that resembled chocolate pudding. It would be another two miles before Audrey stopped screaming, Sultan stopped barking, and Sam would unfold himself from the fetal position to watch the rain wash the smear of goo off his window. Ben welcomed back the persistent sound of the rain on the roof. On the radio, Nixon still refused to hand over his Oval Office tapes to Archibald Cox. “Dad?” Sam asked. Ben looked at his son in the mirror. He had taken off his glasses, but his right eye remained behind the patch. “Was that a monster?” he asked. Ben couldn’t say. He didn’t know exactly what a monster looked like. ••• Rex had said the Surf’s End House was cozy, which, in real estate, means small. This place wasn’t cozy, it was rustic, which, in real estate, means dilapidated. Located at the dead end of a short access road, Ben had noticed only one other property on the street as they drove up. Rain had been punching this place into the sand for years. Buckling slightly through the middle, wild vegetation bookended either side with what appeared to be the pressure of a vice. The worn, cracked shingles of the siding dripped with black lichen, as if the house had been crying though mascara. The station wagon’s headlights exposed a patchwork of fuzzy green moss up on the roof. Ben could see a single fern growing up there too next to the chimney. Besides the fern, the house also came with a stone-faced old man sitting on the covered porch, a Continued on Page 22


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 13

12 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

COA S T W E E K E N D C A L E N DA R Saturday, Oct. 28 Riverwalk Marketplace 9 a.m., 632 Marine Drive, Astoria, 503260-5592. This market features produce, flowers, plant starts, eggs, ready-to-eat food, pie walks, live music and kids’ activities. Halloween Happenin’s 10 a.m., downtown Seaside. A weekend of family activities includes an aquatic touch tank, face painting, pumpkin decorating, costume contest and more.

Thursday, Oct. 26 History & Hops 6 p.m., Seaside Brewing Co., 851 Broadway, Seaside, 503738-7065. Friedrich Schuler will present a historical look into the mouth of the Columbia River from 1870 to 1910 at the next History & Hops speaker series. Reader’s Theater 7 p.m., Liberty Theatre, 1203 Commercial St., Astoria, 503-325-5922, $15. Reader’s Theater presents “The Turn of the Screw,” the story of a gathering of friends and the ghost stories they tell. Coast Weekend welcomes comments and contributions from readers. New items for publication consideration must be submitted by 10 a.m. Tuesday, one week and two days before publication.

PHOTO BY PATRICK WEBB

“Blithe Spirit”

7:30 p.m., Coaster Theatre, 108 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1242, $20 to $25, rated PG. Noel Coward’s “Blithe Spirit” is a supernatural comedy to die for.

Haunted Experience 10 a.m., Seaside Inverted Experience,

111 Broadway, Seaside, 503-470-8040. Experience a unique attraction where everything is turned upside down, haunted houses, too.

make an environmental difference by collecting marine debris data for the Coastal Observation & Seabird Survey Team.

Seaside Sashay 10 p.m., Seaside Convention Center, 415 First Ave., Seaside, 503-3258109. Hayshakers and Sunset Promenaders welcome the public to the annual square dance festival, includes Passport Promenade and Craft Fair.

Open House 11 a.m., South Pacific County Humane Society, 330 Second St., Long Beach, Wash. SPCHS will host a Halloween-themed open house and big raffle with storytelling, face painting, refreshments and adoptable dogs and cats.

COASST Training 11 a.m., CCC Towler Hall, 1651 Lexington Ave., Astoria, 206-221-6893. Help

“War of the Worlds” 1 p.m., Birkenfeld Theatre, 75 Nehalem St., Clatskanie, 503-728-3403, $10

to $13. Stageworks Northwest presents a stage performance of Orson Welles’ classic thriller “War of the Worlds.” Thriller Dance 6 p.m., Riverwalk, Astoria, 503-325-4356. The Thriller dance will be lead, trained for and conducted on the river walk; a video will be taken followed by the crawl to local bars. Halloween Party 7 p.m., McMenamins Sand Trap, 1157 Marion Ave., Gearhart, 503-717-8150, no cover. Come in costume to celebrate the spookiest of holidays and experience some

paranormal activity, costume contest and live music. Hocus Pocus 7 p.m., Raymond Theater, 323 3rd St., Raymond, Wash., $10. Steve Hamilton (aka Steve the Pretty Good) performs his magic act in a family friendly Hocus Pocus event aimed at adults.

“Blithe Spirit” 7:30 p.m., Coaster Theatre, 108 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-4361242, $20 to $25, rated PG. Noel Coward’s “Blithe Spirit” is a supernatural comedy to die for.

Friday, Oct. 27 Haunted Experience 4 p.m., Seaside Inverted Experience, 111 Broadway, Seaside, 503470-8040. Experience a unique attraction where everything is turned upside down, haunted houses, too.

Children’s Adventure 5 p.m., Lewis & Clark National Historical Park, 92343 Fort Clatsop Road, Astoria, 503861-2471. Children of all ages are invited to

an evening adventure of “Bats, Spiders, Owls, Oh My!” an evening walk filled with stories, fun facts and night creatures. Exhibit Opening 5 p.m., Columbia Pacific Heritage Museum, 115 Lake St., Ilwaco, Wash., 360-642-3446. There will be an opening reception for “Flashback: Remembering the 60s” accompanied by

the museum’s annual “6 x 6” art show and auction. Seaside Sashay 7 p.m., Seaside Convention Center, 415 First Ave., Seaside, 503-3258109. Hayshakers and Sunset Promenaders welcome the public to the annual square dance festival; square dance attire admired but not required.

Coast Weekend editor suggested events

FACEBOOK.COM/PORTOFCALLASTORIA

Zombie Crawl

5 p.m., Port of Call, 894 Commercial St., Astoria, 503-325-4356, $3. Meet at the Port of Call to participate in Zombification, blood galore and clothes tearing from specialized make up artists; tickets can be bought prior to the event.

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Talking Tombstones 1 p.m., Greenwood Cemetery, 91569 Hwy. 202, Astoria, 503-325-2203. Talking Tombstones (XIV) is an annual event known for ghostly visits from those returning for a graveside chat; arrive by 3 p.m. for best viewing; donations welcome.

Wednesday, Nov. 1

Book Fair 3 p.m., John Jacob Astor Elementary, 3550 Franklin Ave., Astoria. The elementary school will host its Scholastic Book Fair with books for all ages; proceeds go toward the school’s library.

PHOTO BY JOSHUA BESSEX

Riverwalk Marketplace 9 a.m., 632 Marine Drive, Astoria, 503260-5592. This market features produce, flowers, plant starts, eggs, ready-to-eat food, pie walks, live music and kids’ activities.

Sunday Afternoon Live 2 p.m., Raymond Theatre, 323 Third St., Raymond, Wash., 360875-5123, $5. Sunday Afternoon Live presents Steve the Pretty Good who entertains with magic and comedy, children must be accompanied by adults.

COASST Training 11 a.m., Cannon Beach History Center, 1387 Spruce St., Cannon Beach, 206221-6893. Help make an environmental difference by collecting marine debris data for the Coastal Observation & Seabird Survey Team.

Wrestling Event 5 p.m., Astoria Events Center, 255 9th St., Astoria, 503-791-5843, $10. Pacific Northwest Pro Wrestling brings action-packed wrestling to Astoria.

Haunted Experience 2 p.m., Seaside Inverted Experience, 111 Broadway, Seaside, 503-470-8040. Experience a unique attraction where everything is turned upside down, haunted houses, too.

ON YOUR PHONE

Check out the Coast Weekend calendar, and other great content at CoastWeekend.com

Murder Mystery Dinner 6 p.m., Maggie’s On The Prom, 580 Beach Drive, Seaside, $55. The Murder Mystery Dinner is a sock hop gone sour, features a three course meal, a two hour 1950s-themed show that’s engaging and interactive; reservations required.

Haunted Experience 4 p.m., Seaside Inverted Experience, 111 Broadway, Seaside, 503470-8040. Experience a unique attraction where everything is turned upside down, haunted houses, too.

Tuesday, Oct. 31 Haunted Experience 2 p.m., Seaside Inverted Experience, 111 Broadway, Seaside, 503470-8040. Experience a unique attraction where everything is turned upside down, haunted houses, too. Cookie Walk 6 p.m., Pacific County Fire District, 26110 Ridge Ave., Ocean Park, Wash. Bring the kids for a Halloween party, lots of games and a cookie walk hosted by the Chamber. Halloween Party 7:30 p.m., Driftwood, 179 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2439, 21+. The Driftwood Restaurant & Lounge will host a Halloween celebration with drink specials, dancing and a costume contest.

Author Talk 5 p.m., Book Warehouse, 1111 Roosevelt Drive, Seaside, 503-738-3055. Join family descendants of Crazy Horse and author William Matson for a discussion and book signing of “Crazy Horse: The Lakota Warrior’s Life & Legacy.” Book Fair 4 p.m., John Jacob Astor Elementary, 3550 Franklin Ave., Astoria. The elementary school will host its Scholastic Book Fair with books for all ages; proceeds go toward the school’s library.

Thursday, Nov. 2 Book Fair 8 a.m., John Jacob Astor Elementary, 3550 Franklin Ave., Astoria. The elementary school will host its Scholastic Book Fair with books for all ages; proceeds go toward the school’s library.

Lecture Series 10 a.m., Historic Oysterville Schoolhouse, 3322 School Road, Oysterville, Wash., $3 donation. Capt. Dan Jordan of the Columbia River Bar Pilots will speak on “Providing Safe Passage” at the next Oysterville Community Club Town Hall & Lecture series.

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14 // COASTWEEKEND.COM Coast Weekend’s local restaurant review

Hong Kong Restaurant due for a spring cleaning Review and photos by THE MOUTH OF THE COLUMBIA MOUTH@COASTWEEKEND.COM

FACEBOOK.COM/MOUTHOFTHECOLUMBIA

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n Astoria’s northeast edge, the decades old Hong Kong Restaurant has settled into a bland bargain where portion is prized über alles. Essentially, they deliver two insipid meals for the price of one decent one. Which is to say: your to-go box will be teeming. Whether or not you’ll want those leftovers — or even the first go-round — is another question. In searching for developed flavors and freshness at Hong Kong Restaurant I came up empty-handed. What I found instead were towering, tasteless heaps, like a sesame chicken that was woefully short on actual chicken. (Most of the fried fare was two-thirds or three-quarters oily, artery-clogging dough encasing a smidgen of meat.) I crossed paths with vegetables — cabbage, bamboo chutes, water chestnuts and the like — that were all but crispy water. I squinted and sniffed at seafoods, wondering whether they’d spent more time in the ocean or the freezer. To be sure: This exhausted strain of Americanized Chinese food is hardly exclusive to Hong Kong Restaurant. It is, I reckon, more a reflection of American comforts and palates than anything worldly. As Jiayang Fan wrote in a recent issue of The New Yorker: “By now, most Americans recognize that Westernized basics like chop suey and General Tso’s are compromised simulacra of authentic Chinese food.” Hong Kong Restaurant has plied

HONG KONG RESTAURANT Rating:  2813 Marine Drive Astoria, Ore. 97103 503-325-5344 Hours: 11 a.m.-11 p.m. everday Price: $ – teeming portions for around $10 Service: Patient, quick Vegetarian / Vegan Options: Dull vegetables Drinks: Full bar KEY TO STAR RATING SYSTEM  Below average  Average  Good  Excellent  Best in region

Special No. 1: General Tso’s chicken, sesame chicken, chicken with pea pods and vegetables, pork fried rice

Wonton Soup

this model for decades. It is due, at the very least, for some extensive spring cleaning. The first to be tossed is the squid. Part of the Three Delicacies (at $11.95, the most expensive single item on the menu) the geometrically machined squid tubes were rubbery as a tire and tasted like an aquarium smells. Throw out the General Tso’s sauce, too. Smacking of corn syrup and little else, it was too sugary to eat with dinner. It made more sense as a dessert jelly to dip fortune cookies in (but even then only in moderation). And while there could be hope of overhauling the dull, lightly garlic-y

ing rather than cooked to order, that a good deal of it is sitting, waiting to be warmed, finished or dunked in the fryer. All of this is a huge bummer. More authentic and vibrant Chinese food in the region would be so welcome. So, too, would be more Americanized Chinese that at least offers a modicum of concern for health and/or flavor, where the kitchen is engaged. And while the argument “it’s really cheap” may be tempting, let’s remember: Offering food at bargain-basement prices isn’t necessarily an act of compassion. Nor is it one that necessarily has our best interests at heart. CW

oil that coated everything I had that wasn’t fried (such as the Three Delicacies and Chicken w/ Pea Pods & Vegetables), it might be better to just chuck it and start over. The sauce was muting, hardly elevating. It made everything taste gray. While we’re cleaning, the menu also needs a good scrubbing. Loads of choices stem from too few ingredients. For the most part it comes down to fried, oil-slicked or both. For the dozens upon dozens of choices, there are few disparate flavors. Servers offered little more direction. “Everything is good,” goes the refrain. When pressed, recommendations were so tepid I had to wonder:

Maybe there really aren’t any standouts, specialties or hidden gems. Two different servers did call the Beef w/ Broccoli ($8.50) “popular.” The beef was thin and chewy. The broccoli’s essence was cooked out. Everything was smothered by that indeterminate oil, melding and minimizing everything into a same-y, desaturated mush — another shade of gray. I suppose the Wonton Soup ($6.50/small) is the dish I’d order again if I had to. It had the same overcast flavor, but at least it was wrought with the least offensive ratios of oil and dough to meat. Everything at Hong Kong Restaurant comes out fast, suggest-


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OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 15

CROWS By LYNETTE RAE McADAMS FOR COAST WEEKEND

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lever, audacious and persistent on the one hand; brash, destructive and annoying on the other. In one place, venerated as a messenger of the divine; in the next, perceived as a harbinger of death. No matter your opinion of the common crow (and every person seems to have one), this much is certain: Whether condemned or adored, revered or reviled, Corvus has managed to wing its way into nearly every land and culture on the globe, leaving its dichotomous but indelible mark at each new turn. Belonging to the family Corvidae, this genus encompasses more than 40 different species of crows as well as ravens, rooks and jackdaws. All close cousins, and practically indistinguishable except for size and subtle color variations, these medium-large birds are recognized everywhere by their deeply black, iridescent feathers, broad bills and hoarse, distinctive voices. Originating out of central Asia, where ancient mythology equated them with nothing less than the almighty Sun itself, Corvus now inhabits every region of the Earth but South America and Antarctica. Highly adaptable, and therefore considered some of the planet’s most successful inhabitants, these birds have made themselves at home in fields and forests, on farms and in cities, up in the mountains, out in the desert, and down by the sea. Essentially, everywhere they go, they thrive. Reaching sexual maturity at about 3 (with males taking a little longer),

PHOTO BY LYNETTE RAE McADAMS

A crow on the Astoria Riverwalk

crows seek out partners that typically become mates for life, sharing equally in domestic responsibilities. Socially advanced, they can form tight-knit family groups, with nestlings often lingering for several years to help raise future siblings. In the wild, the life of an average crow spans seven to 10 years, with some species living up to 20. In captivity, the oldest corvid on record died at age 59. Famous for their intelligence and cunning, crows and their kin have one of the highest brain-to-body ratios in the animal kingdom, approaching that of the primates. Such advanced development has allowed them to hone communications and solve complicated problems, even going so far as to craft and use tools to secure food and other resources. In one recent Seattle study, a group of scientists disguised themselves in masks and abducted seven crows. Months after releasing them, the crows were still able to recognize and remember their captors, and attacked on sight. Even more surprising, the crows weren’t content to keep the insult to themselves, but spread word of the offense to others in

their group. Three years later, new generations of crows could still recognize the masks and take appropriate revenge, proving that the experiences of their elders had become not only common knowledge but, in fact, the stuff of Corvid legend. Culturally, crows have accompanied the stories and artwork of humanity for at least 30,000 years, when we first started scribbling on cave walls. Worldwide, evidence of their importance is also revealed in folklore and literature. The ancient Aesop included their conniving antics in several famous fables, Shakespeare wrote them into his plays, and even today the acclaimed poet Mary Oliver exalts their ubiquity, hailing them “the deep muscle of the world.” Most recently — and perhaps most importantly — Corvus has reclaimed its timeless role as an enduring symbol of omniscience, appearing as the “three-eyed crow” in a major plot line of the fantasy book series, “A Song of Ice and Fire,” by George R.R. Martin. In the hit HBO television adaptation, “Game of Thrones,” the character is changed to a three-eyed raven. CW


16 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

‘Flashback’ to the Peninsula of the ’60s

SUBMITTED PHOTOS

Marsh’s Free Musem in Long Beach, Washington

ILWACO, WASH. — The Columbia Pacific Heritage Museum’s latest exhibit, “Flashback: Remembering the 60s,” shows what everyday life was like during that decade of change on the Long Beach Peninsula. The show will be on view Friday, Oct. 27, through Saturday, March 10. An opening reception will take place 5 to 7 p.m. Oct. 27. The 1960s were big time for the Long Beach Peninsula. In 1961, the loss of the fishing vessel Mermaid and the motor lifeboat Triumph became the impetus for the founding of the National

A sign welcoming people to the Long Beach Peninsula in the 1960s

Motor Lifeboat School at Cape Disappointment in 1968. Ilwaco was a happening

2911 Marine Dr #B Astoria, OR 97103 503-325-3276

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Lisa Lynne & Aryeh Frankfurter An enchanting evening of Celtic harps and rare instruments to benefit the PAC , th

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in Long Beach made an exciting new acquisition with Jake the Alligator Man. Developers “found the beach” and created new communities such as Surfside Estates and Tides West. Roads were expanded and the “new” Astoria/Megler Bridge made a great impact on everyday life. This exciting new exhibition highlights everyday life on the Peninsula in the ‘60s and documents many of these changes. “Flashback” is accompanied by the museum’s annual 6x6 (6-inch-by-6-inch) art show and auction. More than 60 artists have contributed a piece with this year’s theme “Something Happening Here.” The artwork will be on display Friday, Oct. 27, until the auction Saturday, Nov. 4. On Friday, Nov. 17, part No. 2 of “Flashback” will open with a special “coffeehouse concert” with the Brownsmead Flats. The exhibition will feature a newly installed gallery dedicated to the pastimes of the era.

CCC Performing Arts Center 588 16th Street, Astoria Admission: $15

Children under 12 FREE with an adult

SERVING BREAKFAST, LUNCH & SUPPER European Style Coffeehouse by day, intimate bistro offering neo-regional cuisine by night. Regional selection of beers, wines and vintage cocktails available. We cater your event!

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Saturday October 28th 243 11th Street, Astoria, OR 97103 503-325-1787

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Hands-on-Harps Beginners Workshop (harps provided)

10am to 12 noon $25 reserves your harp to use or come as a listener and donate what you can.

A multi-instrumentalist duo with Celtic Harpes, Swedish Nyckelharpa, Ukrainian Bandura and more. Beautiful music and wondrous stories TwoWorldsOne.com

Reservations & Information: 503.325.0590


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 17

THE NEW YORK TIMES MAGAZINE CROSSWORD

127 Wife, to Juan 128 Oedipus, for one DOWN 1 Its official name is Academy Award of Merit 2 “The Prophet” author Gibran 3 Shoot (for) 4 Brainteaser 5 Well put 6 Niggling detail 7 Morse word 8 Elite group 9 Classic blazer fabrics 10 Mani-____ 11 Dingy part of a kitchen? 12 Just-passing mark 13 Con 14 ____-friendly 15 Wife on “The Addams Family” 16 Facebook Status: “Vegas, baby! And who would believe I’m standing next to Beyoncé and Katy Perry!” 17 Very cute, in slang 18 Judge 24 Seal the deal 25 Where the Santa Ana and Long Beach Fwys. meet 30 Tip off 32 For 17+ viewers 33 “When pigs fly!” 34 Lightsome 36 Tongue-lash 41 Crater’s edge 44 Muscat resident 45 Unheard-of 47 Get the better of 48 Damaged over time 49 Workplace newbie 50 Facebook Status: “Nosebleed seats — but home-field advantage! GO GIANTS!!!” 52 Ultrasound target

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ley plays folk, blues and jazz.

Brad Griswold 6 p.m., Sweet Basil’s Café, 271 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1539, no cover, 21+. Brad Griswold plays acoustic folk and bluegrass music on banjo, guitar and mandolin.

Little Sue 8 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Little Sue plays pop, country, folk, rock and show tunes.

Kelsey Mousley 7 p.m., WineKraft, 80 10th St., Astoria, 503-468-0206, no cover, 21+. Rhythmn-blues singer songwriter Kelsey Mous-

Monday, Oct. 30 Geezer Creak 6 p.m., Urban Café, 1119 Commercial St., Astoria, 503-338-5133, no cover. Geezer Creak plays originals and a mix of acoustic music with Dale Clark on guitar and Bob Lennon on mandolin. Burgers & Jam

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6:30 p.m., American Legion, 1216 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-2973. The legion offers good burgers and good music.

Tuesday, Oct. 31 Brian O’Connor 5:30 p.m., Shelburne Inn Restaurant, 4415 Pacific Way, Seaview, Wash., 360642-4150, no cover. Acoustic guitarist Brian O’Connor’s repertoire includes nostalgic favorites, an eclectic mix of jazz standards as well as original compositions. Halloween Hellorium 8 p.m., Fort George Brewery, 1483

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Skadi Freyer 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover. Skadi Freyer plays jazz compositions on piano.

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By Tracy Gray / Puzzles Edited by Will Shortz surf in Cancún, Mexico! Bring on the unlimited piña coladas!” 72 Battle of the Atlantic craft 74 “Sleep ____” 75 Old United rival 77 One crossing the line? 78 Eminence 79 Call, as a game 80 “Live With Kelly and Ryan” co-host 82 Gusto 84 10-time French Open champ 85 Born 86 Facebook Status: “Hej from København! This statue turned 100 years old in 2013 but is still a beauty!” 90 Double-O sort 91 Cows and sows 93 Top that may have a built-in bra 94 Exam administered on the forearm 96 Fleur-de-lis, e.g. 98 Bad place for a frog 100 Captained 101 ____ room 104 Praying figure in Christian art 105 It can be smoked 106 Facebook Status: “10-9-8-7. … Ringing in the New Year with 1,000,000 of my newest, closest friends!” 110 Excessive regulation 112 Swahili “sir” 114 Neuter 115 QB Manning 116 Facebook Status: “History abounds! Neo-Classical architecture surrounded by gorgeous cherry- blossom trees. Next stop … the White House!” 121 Sch. with the mascot Mike the Tiger 122 Anatomical ring 123 Recording-studio effect 124 J.F.K. posting 125 Place of Bible study: abbr. 126 In an uncivil way

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ACROSS 1 Signs off on 4 Bei Bei and Bao Bao 10 Mike’s place 16 Barnyard bleat 19 Remained unused 20 Morphine, for one 21 Still 22 Pitches 23 Facebook Status: “2016 Summer Olympics and a day trip to one of the new Seven Wonders of the World!” 26 Bobs and buns 27 Tea-party girl 28 “Repeat …” 29 Valuable china, e.g. 31 Facebook Status: “Across the pond! And front-row seats to the Henley Royal Regatta!” 35 “King ____” (1978 hit) 37 “Above” and “beyond,” e.g. 38 Island ring 39 Chill out 40 Okapi feature 42 Salad green 43 Lily who played Ernestine 46 An arm or a leg 47 “____ it the truth!” 48 Dough dispenser 51 Facebook Status: “Yes! Retail therapy at the largest shopping spot in the U.S.!” 54 Cyberaddress 57 Van Susteren of cable news 59 Campbell of “Scream” 60 Second-____ 61 ____ Miguel (largest island in the Azores) 62 Use part of 64 Sicilian erupter 67 “Am ____ believe …?” 68 Analogy connector 69 TV host Geist 70 Facebook Status: “Ahhhh. … Sun and

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Duane St., Astoria, 503-325-7468, no cover, 21+. Halloween Hellorium features music by Taylor Kingman and the Holy Know-Nothings, the Deadstring Family Band, and Sheck Pee.

Wednesday, Nov. 1 Hayes & Keiski 6 p.m., Sweet Basil’s Café, 271 Hemlock St., Cannon Beach, 503-436-1539, no cover, 21+. Bill Hayes and Gary Keiski play Americana and rhythm-n-blues music. Buzz Rogowski 6:30 p.m., Bridgewater Bistro, 20 Basin St., Astoria, 503-325-6777, no cover.

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Acoustic jazz pianist Buzz Rogowski includes smooth jazz, instrumental and new age compositions in his repertoire. Champagne Sunday 7 p.m., Adrift Hotel, 409 Sid Snyder Drive, Long Beach, Wash., 360-6422311, no cover. Champagne Sunday fires off gypsy-punk rock and raucous folk songs alongside intimate tear-jerkers and anthemic foot-stompers. Metzner & Patenaude 9 p.m., Voodoo Room, 1114 Marine Drive, Astoria, 503-325-2233, no cover, 21+. Scheckie Metzner and Pee Wee Patenaude play blues, soul and Caribbean music with Josh Baer on bass.


18 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

coa st w eeken d M ARK ETPLACE 110 Announcements

New Patient Special Dr. Stephanie White is inviting you to her practice to receive the highest quality care for your dental needs. Mention this Ad and receive a Free Electric Toothbrush! Schedule Today!! 503-738-9273 3965 HWY 101 N. Gearhart, OR 97138 www.gearhartdentistry.com Email:

613 Houses

Artistic Cannon Beach Vacation Home available for longer-term rental. Beautifully appointed four bedroom main home with detached office/studio. Walk to town and beaches, peekaboo view. $3500 month. Photos cannot describe the serenity and ambiance of this home. A must see. Owned by nationally collected, Cannon Beach artist, Miska 425-922-6329

frontdesk@gearhartdentistry.com

Special applies to new patients that receive a comprehensive exam. Special expires 12/31/17

204 Automobiles 2011 Subaru Forrester 109,000 miles Roof rack, cruise control, a/c. Very good condition $9200/obo 503-325-1636

481 Freebies Male Cat(Neutered) Looking for Home for 10yo Social/friendly cat All shots current Contact:503-436-2301

504 Homes for Sale 92159 Clover Road Astoria, OR 2/bd 1/ba Fireplace, large backyard, water frontage. $130,000 firm Lots of potential. (503)325-2068 Classified Ads work hard for you!

604 Apartments Seaside: Riverview, 2 bedroom, 1 bath Washer/dryer, carport. $875 per month+deposit. DNC Rental Properties (503)791-2885

613 Houses Beautiful Beach House In Seaside Upscale, Convenient Location, 3Bedroom/2.5Bathrooms, Double Garage, Gas Fireplace $1795/month. No-Pets/Smoking. 503-528-4842.

Large family home available Nov 1. Lots of light, large yard, garage, washer and dryer. $3,000/mo., Cannon Beach , OR. 503-440-7354.

616 Rooms & Roommates Homeshare: Bedroom available, $650. First/Last month, $300 security deposit. No pets/smoking. 503-338-0703.

651 Help Wanted CHURCH ADMINISTRATIVE-ASST. Part-time, tech-savvy, compassionate, self-motivated, team-player. Send resume/letter to Astoria United Methodist Church office@unitedmethodistastoria.org

Clatsop Community College is recruiting for the following part-time positions: •Part-time Temporary Student Services Assistant: Scheduled to work no more than 599 hours annually. •Adjunct Nursing Assistant Instructor: Needed for winter term 2018. Must have RN license and three years of experience working in the nursing field. These positions are open until filled. Apply online at our web site www.clatsopcc.edu Contact the Office of Human Resources at (503)338-2406 if application assistance is needed. AA/EOE

651 Help Wanted

Client Service Representative We are looking for an energetic individual, with multi-tasking abilities and great customer service skills to join our team. Salary DOE, competitive benefit package, vacation. Send resumes to: sseppa@knutsenins.com or PO Box 657, Astoria, OR 97103 Customer Service Representative Must possess excellent customer service skills, computer/data entry, file, fax, answer phones. Must be dependable, organized, self-motivated and a team player. Submit resume and cover letter to North Coast Home Care. Email kevin@nchc.net or fax (503)325-1437 Elements Restoration is looking for a Retail Store Sales Manager. Previous sales experience a must. Includes: Knowledge of floor coverings, cabinetry and countertops. Call Scott at (503)440-1542 Hiring CDL drivers for the Astoria and Warrenton areas. Home daily, paid weekly. Call for details (360)262-9383 Looking for a new place to live? The classified ads offer a complete section of homes, apartments, and mobile homes to fit your needs. Check daily for new listings! Housekeeping, Front Desk, Maintenance positions available. Full/Part-time positions. Must be 18 and valid driver’s license required and no SR22s. Applications may be picked up and returned at: Inn of the Four Winds 820 N. Prom. Seaside Oregon

651 Help Wanted

651 Help Wanted

651 Help Wanted

Maintenance Person for vacation rental homes in Cannon Beach. Must be self-starter skilled in basic home repairs. Position is full time and permanent.

MCMENAMINS Sand Trap Pub is Now Hiring Servers! What we need from you: An open and flexible schedule, including days, evenings, weekends and holidays. Previous experience is preferred! A love of working in a busy, customer service-oriented environment. Seasonal and Long term positions are available. Interested in a career in the hospitality industry? We offer opportunities for advancement as well as an excellent benefit package to eligible employees, including vision, medical, chiropractic, dental and so much more! Apply online 24/7 at mcmenamins.com OR stop by the Sand Trap and fill out an application. 1157 N. Marion Ave. Gearhart, OR 97138 EOE.

Licensed Practical Nurse needed for implementing and supervising nursing services in a medical detoxification and residential program. Qualifications: - Certification from accredited school and current Washington LPN licensure to practice. -One year of experience as an LPN providing specialized care for persons with drug and/or alcohol dependency including withdrawal intervention -Current BLS required -Must have a NPI Please send resume to

kedwards@kleancenter.com

360-642-3105 Ext 2233

Send Resume to: Cannon Beach Vacation Rentals P.O. Box 723 Cannon Beach, OR 97110 WHY store items you’ll never use again? Exchange them for cash with a low-cost ad in the classifieds.

Lives in Transition Director: This is a ¾ time position with benefits. View job description/minimum qualifications and apply on-line at our web site www.clatsopcc.edu. Applications must be submitted by 5 PM on November 3, 2017. Call the Office of Human Resources at Clatsop Community College (503)338-2406 if application assistance is needed. AA/EOE HAVING storage problems? Why not sell no-longer-used items with a fastworking classifed ad? Local upscale restaurant Hiring a chef and Line cooks Please send resume to Blind Box 33 c/o The Daily Astorian P.O. Box 210, Astoria, OR 97103 The City of Cannon Beach is seeking qualified applicants for the position of Police Officer. Salary: $22.90 to $29.22 Hourly Closing Date: 11/10/17 For application information please visit: www.ci.cannon-beach.or.us/ police/page/police-officer-job Classified Ads work hard for you!

IF YOU HAVE an eye for real value, you’ll eye the classified ads regularly.

McMenamins Sand Trap Pub and Gearhart Hotel located in Gearhart, OR is now hiring for Property Manager. This position is responsible for managing all operations on a hotel property, including all kitchen, catering, hotel and pub related operations. Qualified applicants must have at least 3 years previous hospitality management experience (in a general management capacity) on a multi-department property, enjoy working in a busy customer serviceoriented environment, have an open & flex schedule including, days, evenings, weekends and holidays. We offer an excellent work environment, along with a competitive benefit package. We are interested in people who want a long term career in the hospitality industry. Mail cover letter and resume to 430, N. Killingsworth Portland OR 97217 attn: Human Resources. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls or emails to individual locations! E.O.E. Classified Ads work hard for you!

Property Management Company Local native owned, Eco-friendly/sustainable 120+ homes Arch Cape to Gearhart POSITION AVAILABLE Marketing/Office/Cleaner Expert Part-Time to Full-Time, Bonuses, Health, Vacation, Sick, Mileage, Cell Phone D.O.E, Background check References, reliability and weekends required www.KukuiHouse.com

503.828.9889 The Portway is looking for an experienced cook. Full-time/year round. Please apply in person at the Portway 422 West Marine Drive, Astoria. No phone calls please.


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 19

coa st w eeken d M ARK ETPLACE 651 Help Wanted

651 Help Wanted

828 Misc for Sale

Restaurant Manager Great benefits Great wages Great Team Members

Want an international experience without leaving home? Come work at Tongue Point Job Corps Center! Our students, and staff, represent numerous countries and cultures from around the world.

Davidson 701D one color printing press

Come work for Oregon’s finest family-owned coastal hospitality company. As part of the Martin North team, you’ll help provide impeccable service, luxury guest experiences and family fun in stunning Cannon Beach. Applications: online at www.martinnorth.team/ careers or in person at 148 East Gower Cannon Beach Please call Tamara at 503-436-1197 if you have questions. We look forward to hearing from you.

South County Multi-Media Sales Professional South Clatsop County has some of the Oregon Coast’s most beautiful settings (see www.discoverourcoast.com). It also has busy, vibrant communities with year-round residents, as well as weekend visitors. We have an immediate opening for a South County Multi-Media Sales Professional based out of our office in Seaside. In addition to being passionate about helping local businesses be successful, you must demonstrate excellence in person-to-person sales and customer service, work well with a support team and be proficient with technology while managing time and customer base efficiently. This is a full-time position, working Monday through Friday with evenings and weekends off, plus paid holidays! Base wage plus commission, mileage reimbursement plus paid time off(PTO), insurances and a 401(k)/ Roth 401(k) retirement plan. Send resume and letter of interest to: EO Media Group, PO Box 2048 Salem, OR 97308-2048 or e-mail: hr@eomediagroup.com

Now Hiring! School Bus Drivers Dining Hall Attendants Administrative Clerk For information and to apply: www.mtcjobs.com

PHOTOS COURTESY SOUWESTERLODGE.COM

Clean and in excellent shape. Has been running daily. New 208 ac motor. Extra supplies and parts. Services & parts manuals. $1,500 OBO Available Oct 1 in Astoria, OR you haul.

Questions? Call 503-338- 4961

Contact Tom or Carl at The Daily Astorian 503-325-3211

Excellent Benefit Package 3 weeks vacation 2 weeks sick time 11 paid holidays Fidelity 401(k) w/match Medical, Dental & Vision plans Company paid Life, AD&D and Long Term Disability Insurance Staff use of racquetball court, weight room, gym, low cost meals in our dining hall!

A small town newspaper with a global outlook

Management & Training Corporation is an Equal Opportunity Employer Minority/Female/Disability/ Veteran MTC Values Diversity! Tongue Point Job Corp Center is a Drug-free and tobacco-free workplace.

SHOP LOCAL!

Check the Business Directory daily to utilize the local professionals advertising in The Daily Astorian. To place an ad in our Business Directory, call 503-325-3211.

652 Work Wanted Do you need a caregiver? Or an aide? Or even just a companion. Call Rae 503-368-7217

Crossword Answer

One of the Pacific Northwest’s great small newspapers

The Daily

asTorian www.dailyastorian.com

710 Pets & Supplies AKC YELLOW LABS

Great hunting breed 1/2 English/Irish bloodlines $500 503-318-4804 EVERYTHING is coming up results when you use a classified ad!

Bird up: Field guide hosts field trip seeking feathered friends

SPECIALTY SERVICES

wE urgE you to pAtronIzE thE LoCAL proFESSIonALS ADvErtISIng In

thE DAILy AStorIAn SpECIALty SErvICES. to pLACE your SpECIALty SErvICES AD, CALL 325-3211.

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SEAVIEW — People who would like to participate in a birding field trip with Mark Elliot, the field trip guide for the Audubon Society of Lincoln City, will meet inside the Sou’wester Lodge 9:30 a.m. Sunday, Oct. 29, and finish at noon. The cost is $5 per person, $10 per family. All skill levels are welcome. The birds we will look for include Golden-crowned sparrow, sanderlings, hermit thrushes, great blue herons, surf scoters, western grebes and bald eagles. We will learn about bird behavior and how to identify birds by using “fieldmarks” and habitat. We will be hiking in and around Cape Disappointment State Park, and we can carpool. A Washington State Park “Discovery Pass” will be needed for parking. Bring binoculars. The class will happen rain or shine. People who want to continue birding in the afternoon should bring a sack lunch. RSVP via souwesterfrontdesk@gmail.com or 360-642-2542. The Sou’wester Lodge at 3728 J Place, Seaview, Washington. This class is part of the fall and winter 2017-18 Workshop Series at the Sou’wester. Visit souwesterlodge.com/calendar to see the schedule of more than 28 artist-led workshops.


20 // COASTWEEKEND.COM

Visit cats and dogs, enter raffle at Humane Society open house LONG BEACH, WASH. — Stop by the South Pacific County Humane Society shelter for our Open House and BIG Raffle between 11 a.m. and 4 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 28. The shelter will be decorated for Halloween. Enjoy snacks and refreshments while visiting with our dogs and cats. The shelter is located at 330 Second St. N.E. in Long Beach, Washington. The BIG Raffle will take

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annex. Grand prizes include: $2,000 cash, $750 cash, $500 cash and a $250 gift card. Raffle ticket holders do not have to be present to win. After the raffle drawing, losing tickets are automatically entered into our “Losers Can Be Winners” drawing. Prizes include: One week of pet boarding at the Humane Society ($100 value); one year of Dog Kennel

Sponsorship ($100 value); one year of Cat Kennel Sponsorship ($100 value); and more! There will be fun activities for children 1 to 4 p.m. at the annex. Storytelling starts at 1 p.m. with face painting afterwards. Patronize our BIG Raffle BIG Prize sponsors, especially our BIG donors: The Breakers, Crab Pot Restaurant and Dennis Company.

Coast Guard teaches boating safety Oct. 28 ILWACO, WASH. — Most boat- includes operating a personal ing experiences are positive, watercraft or any motorized the stuff memories are made watercraft 15 horsepower of. But the most joyful times or greater. You can be cited can quickly turn deadly if a hefty fine for not having a boaters are not vigilant about card. Many boat insurance safety at all times. As a boat companies will offer boating operator or passenger, you insurance discounts to those can become educated on who successfully complete a ways to be safe while on the Boating Safely class. water. Topics include safe From 8:30 a.m. to 4 p.m. boating laws, operating your Saturday, Oct. 28, the Coast boat safely and other boating Guard Auxiliary will offer an tips, avoiding collisions and in-depth recreational Boating accidents, navigation, boating Safely class to the public. emergencies and rescue, It will be held at the Port of and trailering, storing and Ilwaco Conference Room protecting your boat. You can (street side upstairs), 165 also make arrangements with Howerton Ave. Arrive at 8:15 Auxiliarists to conduct coura.m. to sign in. tesy vessel examinations. All This class meets the reboaters are reminded that safe quirements for the mandatory navigation is the responsibiliWashington Boater Education ty of each vessel’s operator. Card upon successful comThe class costs $10, which pletion. includes all class materials Washington law requires and a Washington boating recreational boat operators booklet. age 59 or younger to carry a For registration and quesboater education card when tions, contact Elena Righettini operating a recreational at 360-642-0039 or mrighettiboat in Washington. This ni@yahoo.com. 2x1EOMediaFiller - Page 1 - Composite The most valuable and respected source of local news, advertising and information for our communities.

www.eomediagroup.com

‘Fat of the Land’ author shares journey at Seaside library SEASIDE — The Friends of the Seaside Library welcomes Langdon Cook, author of “Fat of the Land: Adventures of a 20th Century Forager,” 7 p.m. Thursday, Nov. 2. The event will take place in the Community Room. There will be book sales and signings. We will explore the Pacific Northwest via Cook’s adventures in foraging and discover a regional stew of food, natural history and oddball characters. Foraging is not just a throwback to our hunter-gatherer past; it’s a way to reconnect with the landscape. And Cook is not your typical grocery cart-toting dad. For him, gourmet delicacies abound, free for the taking if we just open our eyes. He finds himself free-diving in icy Puget Sound in hopes of spearing a snaggletooth lingcod, armed with nothing more than a “Hawaiian sling.” He tempts fate by eating mushrooms that may or may not be poisonous. He strings

up a fly rod to chase after sea-run trout. He even pulls on the gardening gloves to collect stinging nettles. He traces his journey from wrangler of prepackaged calories to connoisseur of coveted wild edibles. In addition, Cook will focus on specific food types, organized around seasons of the year, and conclude with recipes featuring the author’s hardwon bounty. Cook was a senior book editor at Amazon until, in 2004, he left the corporate world to live in a cabin off the grid with his wife and son. Now a freelance writer and editor, Lang has written for the San Francisco Bay Guardian, Outside, Gray’s Sporting Journal, Fly Fisherman, the Stranger, Seattle Metropolitan and Conservation Magazine. The Seaside Public Library is located at 1131 Broadway St. For more information, call 503-7386742 or visit seasidelibrary. org.

Coaster Theatre Playhouse

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Sept. 22 - Oct. 28, 2017 GALLON AVAILABLE AT 3 LOCATIONS

Freshly Harvested Cranberries

THE FARM SATURDAYS AND SUNDAYS IN & SANDRIDGE ROAD • LONG BEACH OCTOBER AND OPEN DAILY 113TH 49TH & PACIFIC HIGHWAY • SEAVIEW AT ‘THE FARM’ PACIFIC HIGHWAY • CHINOOK

Tickets $20 or $25 Shows begin at 7:30 p.m.

Sunday shows start at 3:00p.m. Sponsored by Becker Capital Management Tickets: 503-436-1242 or coastertheatre.com 108 N Hemlock Street, Cannon Beach, OR


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 21

Halloween October Seaside, Happenin's

28-31 2017 Oregon

Saturday, October 28th FREE All Day All Day 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00 10:00-3:00

Decorated Businesses - throughout town Giant Pumpkin Selfie Station @ Carousel Mall Aquatic Touch Tank @ Seaside Carousel Mall Face Painting @ Del Sol Airbrush Tattoo @ Sea Star Gelato Kids Crafts @ Seaside Brewing Co Fish Prints @ Buddha Kat Winery Balloon Animals @ Cotton Club Halloween Coloring @ Pig ‘N Pancake Medix Ambulance ‘Andy’ @ Wyndham Shark Tank Haunted House Experience @ Seaside Inverted Experience 10:00-3:00 Pumpkin Patch, Pumpkin Decorating & Scavenger Hunt @ Hillcrest Inn 11:00 & 2:00 Halloween Storytime @ Beach Books 3:00pm Pet Costume Contest 3:15pm Pet Parade (Route: Quatat Park - Broadway Columbia - Oceanway)

Saturday Evening, October 28th

Boos, Blues & Brews @ Elks Lodge (324 Avenue A) 5:00pm 5:30-6:30 6:30-7:00 7:00-8:00 8:00-8:30 8:30-10:30

Doors & Dinner Redwood Son Surprise Entertainment Ted Vaughn Blues Band Costume Contest Blitzen Trapper

Sunday, October 29th 6:00-9:00

with two cans of food

a benefit for the south county food bank

Murder Mystery Dinner @Maggie’s on the Prom, 581 S Promenade $55 p/ person

Tuesday, October 31st 2:00-5:00

10 or $ 5 $

Downtown Seaside Trick or Treating

1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.

Beach Books, 616 Broadway Buddha Kat Winery, 37 N Edgewood Carousel Mall, 300 Broadway Cotton Club, 415 Broadway Del Sol, 530 Broadway Elks Lodge, 324 Ave A Maggie’s on the Prom, 581 S Prom

8. Pig N’ Pancake, 323 Broadway St 9. Quatat Park, East of Necanicum River 10. Seaside Inverted Experience, 111 Broadway, Suite 7 11. Seaside Brewing Co, 851 Broadway St 12. Sea Star Gelato, 8 N Columbia 13. Wyndham Shark Exhibit, 1 Broadway St

A portion of this project was made possible from a grant from the City of Seaside Tourism Advisory Committee, funded by room tax dollars


house over twenty years without some murder going on. Leaving all their belongings behind? Their cars? People just don’t do that.” “I thought you didn’t put names on things you don’t understand?” “Exactly,” Earl said. “Look, I don’t mean to make you uneasy, but I see you’ve got your kids with you there. It’s not too late for you to go back into town and get yourself a motel room.” Ben relaxed as he realized Earl’s angle. For some reason, Earl Sloane didn’t want them here. All this talk of ghosts and murder — well, that was just a local razzing an out-of-towner. Next the old kook would probably tell him Haystack Rock was built by aliens. Even the guy out on the highway could be in on it. He wasn’t sure how, but that seemed more plausible than being attacked by this guy’s dead son. “We’ll take our chances,” Ben said. Earl dangled the key out in front of him. “Be my guest, Pete. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. Oh, and stay out of the basement. That’s the owner’s private area.” Back in the car, Audrey turned to him. “Well?” “Let’s not bother Mr. Earl Sloane for the rest of the week.”

Continued from Page 11

shotgun resting on his lap. “7649 Carronade Lane,” Ben said as he double-checked the slip of paper he had written Rex’s directions on. “I guess this is it?” “Can we just go home?” Audrey pleaded. “But we’ve come all this way,” Ben said, to which Sam added, “And what if he’s still out there?,” which is what they’d all really been thinking. Ben tossed up the hood of his yellow rain jacket and got out of the station wagon. The man on the porch stood with some difficulty. Ben noticed that he walked with a severe limp running through his right leg and that he used the shotgun barrel-down against the porch as a makeshift cane. “Evening,” Ben said. “You must be the happy vacationers,” the man said. “Welcome to the beach.” “Pete Archer,” Ben said, slipping on his alias for the first time out loud. “Earl Sloane,” the man said. “I guess you could say that I’m the caretaker around here.” “Earl,” Ben said. “I’m a little confused here. This is 7649 Carronade? I thought this was the Surf’s End House?” “Nah,” Earl said. “Surf’s End is down at the other end of the block.” Earl lifted the shotgun to point into the darkness over Ben’s shoulder and Ben instinctively flinched. “Easy there.” Earl chuckled. “You passed it on your way up. They must’ve just given you my address because I have the key.” Rex hadn’t said anything about a caretaker, just that the key would be under the mat, but Ben could only shrug it off at this time of night. And really, the place down the block had looked a lot better cared for than this dump. Apparently, Earl didn’t like to bring his work home with him. Earl disappeared into the house and emerged some time later, key in hand. “Holler if you need anything. Hopefully you’ll get a good night’s sleep. If I do say, you look a little shaky, Pete. Long drive from … ?” “Spokane,” Ben lied. “Yeah, long drive, bad weather, and we saw something … strange.” Ben couldn’t help but overshare. He’d been holding it together to keep the kids from falling apart, but what he had seen had spooked him to his core.

•••

“Just north of town,” Ben continued. “We saw this hitchhiker. Well, I guess I can’t say for sure he was a hitchhiker, but it was pouring rain so we slowed down. And his face—” “Wrapped up in bandages?” Earl interrupted. Ben nodded. “How’d you know?” Earl furrowed his brow and sighed as he looked down at the porch. “That would be my son, Billy,” he said. “He must’ve sensed you’d be coming my way. He’s always looking for a ride home.” “What happened to him?” Earl shrugged and tapped his right leg with the shotgun. “Tree got him,” he said. “You log enough woods, tree’s gonna get you. I took mine in the leg. Poor Billy took his in the brain.” “Jesus,” Ben said. “Shouldn’t he be in a hospital?” Earl raised his eyebrow and gave Ben a puzzled look. “I don’t think you get me, Pete. Billy’s been dead for a

number of years now. It just doesn’t stop him from trying to make it home every now and then.” “Wait,” Ben said. “Are you telling me he’s a ghost?” Earl sighed again and rested heavier on the shotgun. “I’m trying to tell you that he’s dead. I don’t go putting names to things I don’t understand.” “Right,” Ben said. He was filled with a sudden motivation to exit this porch, but Earl still had the key. “So? We’re done here?” “Let’s see,” Earl said, shifting his weight. “Check out time is noon next Friday. Just put your dirty linens and towels in the washer. No need to start it. The phone only makes local calls. And you were told about the murders?” “Murders?” “Well, technically the state police call them disappearances, but come on. Dogs disappear around here all the time. Cats too. Three separate families don’t just disappear from the same

Like he suspected, the Surf’s End House hardly looked like the site of multiple, ghastly murders: white picket fence, sturdy gray shingles on a good one-story skeleton, two bulbous hydrangeas out front — not exactly the kind of set-up to inspire fear and dread. The yard was littered with flotsam — buoys, glass floats, driftwood — as if some tender tsunami had washed it all across the tiny parcel and left it just so. Inside, the large single room was dressed in knotty pine, with a wood stove in one corner. It was separated from an open kitchen by a matching pine bar. Down a short hallway doorways for three bedrooms and a bath popped open as the kids explored. There was the expected coastal ephemera hanging on the walls: a few prints of seascapes, pithy beach messages done up in needlepoint. Quite a few throw rugs and an assortment of plush furniture softened the spank of the hardwood floors. Built-in cabinets. Even a color TV. In fact, it was all quite tastefully done, except— “What’s that smell?” Audrey asked.


OCTOBER 26, 2017 // 23

Ben had noticed it too when they walked in. It was faint, but ever-present, sharp and saline like a fouled brine. Just as Ben would begin to forget about it, the smell would return, retrieved like an unwanted memory, prickling his nostrils into hard O’s. “Different places have different smells, Odd,” he said. “You probably won’t even notice it when you wake up in the morning. And if it is a dead squirrel, I’m sure Sultan will let us know.” Of course, after he got the kids in bed, he immediately shimmied the knob of the basement door, but it was deadbolted. So he poured himself another bourbon, pining to see how the honeyed firelight from the wood stove would dance off Jessica’s auburn hair. A couple more bourbons and a half-filled ashtray nearly erased the cottage’s wandering stench and the bad taste that Earl Slone had left in Ben’s mouth. A ghost? Really? He replayed the meaty smack of the creature’s palm against the car’s window until the network broadcast bid adieu for the night with the “Star-Spangled Banner.” Smack! That’s about as corporeal as they come. As the broadcast settled into static, he listened to the rain spray the house. He didn’t trust Earl Sloane enough to leave $15,000 in a parked car. But where else could he stash it away from both Earl and the kids? He fingered the seams of the knotty pine, but nothing gave. The kitchen cabinets were too likely to be explored. There was a foot of air under the platform bed in his room which left little to the imagination. So he began to rummage through the built-ins, discovering a Bible on a bed of seashells, a local area guide, a drawer full of machine parts, some extra beach towels, a crab pot, a collection of 8-tracks that ranged from country to doo wop, a guest log, a misplaced set of tongs, and, in the bottom drawer, a heap of skulls reeking of dust and death. Vertebrates. Animals. Critters. Trophies? The waft from the drawer was arid, deep, and unlike the stench that had been following him around the house. He counted seventeen, all various shapes and sizes. Maybe a deer, maybe a raccoon or two, nothing human, but maybe some of these registered too familiar. Sultan had tuckered himself out sniffing the baseboards and lay dead

asleep atop the throw pillow Ben had set on the floor. He pulled one skull from the drawer and set it near Sultan’s sleeping head as his hand shook at the eerie similarity. ••• He will forget how squishy they are when they open. He will never remember how good its steam felt on his chin as the cold rain soaked his covered head. He will not remember shivering. He will never take solace in the luck of this lost cub stirring at the shore of this lapping river; how it went limp in his grip. He will never relish the hot fat smeared into the gauze around his mouth. There is only eat, cold, and home in the moonlight. He does remember the tree avalanching toward him. And them. The orange light that sifted him into a silver bed. The cuffs. How they petted him until he healed. He couldn’t recall how many times he had walked into the orange light. Outside of it, it was only eat, cold, and the moon. He will find a ride home. He will not remember seeing the orange light appear again, hovering like a 3,000-pound firebug above the tree line. Afraid, he will flee the riverbank, forfeiting the young sea lion to the sand, its taste still wrapped around his lips. Why will they keep coming for him? Why will they not let him die? ••• With the weather cleared, they spent the day swamping across a soggy side of Neahkahnie Mountain, encountering poison oak on a few occasions, but no treasure. No gas either. They drove into Cannon Beach proper on fumes for dinner. “Why are there so many missing dogs?” Audrey asked, pointing at one of the telephone poles slathered with a phone number and a photo of an absent Scottie. “Is it like a dog plague?” Ben held his tongue as well as the leash, the end of which Sultan was really testing. “It’s not a dog plague, Odd.” They found a place to nosh fish and chips while staring at Haystack Rock. “So,” Audrey began, “if the President is a criminal, why should any other American not just do whatever they need to get ahead? I mean, it’s like the law almost.”

Ben gulped his beer wrong, coughed, and wondered if Audrey was implying something about their situation. She was not a stupid girl, and he felt she could see his muddy fingerprints all over her life. “Mortality,” Sam answered. “I think you mean morality, buddy,” Ben interjected. Audrey scoffed at her brother’s mistake and let her eye wander across the puddled patio to find a table of teenagers her own age — three boys and a girl. One of the boys, his hair the color of wet sand, was staring right at her as his friends talked. She blushed and looked away, but when she returned, his eyes were still trained on her. A third and fourth glance away didn’t stop him. Who does that? It was so forward. So confident. Could she do that too? “Well, it’s been a pleasure making mud with you gentlemen today,” she said, “but I think I need to speak with my own species.” Ben followed her line of vision across the patio, the first time the boy had shied away, and Ben groaned deeply enough to wake up Sultan at his feet. “I don’t know, Odd.” “This is exactly what Suzy Archer, of Spokane, would do,” she said. The Pete in him understood. “Then be my guest,” he said, “but don’t say I didn’t warn you.” As she sashayed across the patio, shedding dirt from her boots, her body bolted electric on what Suzy Archer was all about. It was liberating, like crawling into a new skin. The group stopped talking as she approached their table. She looked right at the sandy-haired blond boy, ran her fingers through his hair, and said, “Help me! My name is Suzy Archer. I am from Spokane, Washington. I think my dad is losing his mind.” “Take a seat, Suzy A.!,” the girl said. “Yeah,” one of the guys said, “Suzy A.!” When she sat down, she felt the last of Audrey Driscoll expel through her nose. She wasn’t sure who was left, but she wanted to find out. Ben watched his daughter meetcute, before shaking his head and turning to his son. “I’m sorry we didn’t find any treasure,” Ben said. “I don’t care about the treasure,” Sam said. “Hey, if I have to be Aaron Archer, shouldn’t Sultan get a new name too?”

“Like what?” “What about King?” Ben laughed into the end of his beer. “Are you okay, Dad?” “Oh yeah, fine,” Ben said. “That sounds great. So you really didn’t care about the treasure?” Sam shook his head. “Then what were you up to? Why are we all boot-deep in mud?” Sam kept his eye pointed at the table. “I was looking for a ghost,” he said. “I need to know that they are real.” Ben lumped, and sucked in a great deal of air through his nose. “Is this about mom?” Sam nodded. “I miss her.” “Me too, buddy.” Ben swallowed the last splash of his beer and patted Sam’s shoulder. “Me too.” Sam started crying out of his one good eye, which made Ben just fall apart. A boy should be able to cry out of two eyes. He already regretted saying what he was about to say, but he couldn’t stop himself. “You know our neighbor, Earl?” Sam wiped a big streak of snot onto his sleeve, and said, “Not really.” “Well, Earl thinks that thing we saw out on the highway is a ghost.” “Yeah?” Sam perked up. Ben nodded, but Sam’s face went dark. “What is it?” “Do you think all ghosts are like that one?” he asked. “Probably not,” Ben said. Ben paid the check and then called across the patio, “Suzy, let’s jet!” “I’ve got it, Dad,” she said. “Jessie will give me a ride later.” “And this Jessie knows how to get you home?” “It’s not our home,” she said. “But yeah.” Ben groaned again, but held his tongue. Pete Archer was the kind of man who didn’t want to raise a fuss. As they walked back to the car, Ben noticed some crime scene tape roping off a slab of the beach as a yellow excavator lifted the corpse of a German Sheppard out of the falling sand. It was stiff, with all four legs extended like some furry end table set upside down. “Well,” Sam said. “I guess we know what happened to those missing dogs.” Not all of them, Ben thought. To be continued in Part II …

CW


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