March 18, 2020 :: Gender Spectrum

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CO LO R A D O'S LG B TQ M AGA ZINE | F R E E

John Waters is The

DINAH's LEZBRO

GENDER

BENDING

with

RPGs

Queering

the PLAYING FIELD

HOUSE

666 Delivers

of

DIVERSITY

DEADLIFTING

Discrimination out of Powerlifting




CONTENTS MARCH 18, 2020 VOL43 NO24

6

28

John Waters is The

SEEING

THROUGH

GENDER SPECTRUM

DINAH's LEZBRO

THE

8

GAINING STRENGTH Through LGBTQ

34

RPGsTO

IDENTITIES 36

Powerlifting

Queering

10

the

PLAYING

FIELD

14

HOUSE

666 Delivers

of

DIVERSITY 22

INCLUSION

at the

DENAH

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QUEER

ART

HISTORY 38

TRANSITION IS

NONLINEAR 40

UNDERSTANDING THE

GENDER SPECTRUM 42

ARE

WE OUR

FACES?


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O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 5


FROMÂ THE EDITOR

SEEING THROUGH THE

GENDER SPECTRUM

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G

ender is something we each deal with every day, subconsciously or, especially for trans people, consciously. We’re obsessed with where people stand on that spectrum, in sports, the public eye, or even what bathroom we get to use. Even from a cis perspective, this can be frustrating. Although I am female and cisgender, my mix of “gender” interests has always been exceedingly confusing to people. Glitter and heavy metal? Punk and cheerleading? Dinosaurs, science fiction, and fairy princesses? Where does it all fit? Then, like so many others, I found the queer community. Suddenly, it was OK to play with gender, to love things on all sides of the spectrum. And, for trans folks, this is often a much bigger deal. While the gender spectrum largely affects my interests, bodily political autonomy, and professional life, trans folks can’t go a second without having the gender spectrum disrupt their lives. Of course, contrary to what some wrongly believe, this doesn’t mean we have to all be nonbinary. Loving your maleness in a nontoxic way, or embracing your female energy, can be empowering for everyone, and those who love their binary marker, male or female, cis or trans, should also be celebrated. So, this issue is to celebrate all things gender and anti-gender, from John Waters at a lesbian party to a house of black, trans drag performers, to folks reflecting on their own gender experience. It’s to hold up the positives of gender and try and fix them, or set fire to, the bad. We hope you’ll join us. -Addison Herron-Wheeler

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O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 7


GAINING STRENGTH Through LGBTQ Powerlifting by Brent Heinze

I

t’s no secret that the two-gender system in athletics has been a hot conversation topic as of late. Governing organizations in athletics create policies and test for illegal activities to hold people accountable for their actions. In our progressive society where gender identity continues to evolve and become more visible, many organizations and activities have been encouraged to evaluate and modify their policies. These changes can create increased opportunities for people who may have been uncomfortable participating in sports previously because of their gender identity. Many ruling bodies in sports disqualify participants who use testosterone or other androgens commonly used during gender transition or for treatment of a variety of medical conditions, including those living with HIV. Their concerns relate to unfair advantages potentially gained by increased muscle mass as well as other considerations from these “performance enhancing” drugs. They identify the importance of “fair play” along with their policy of inclusion; h o w e v e r, they effectively make the environment either inappropriate or uncomfortable for those athletes who benefit from these particular medical interventions. The debate between medically enhanced therapy to support people’s health versus artificial enhancements to help people win contests continues today. For both long-term, HIV-positive survivors and transgender athletes, hormone replacement therapy, including the use of human growth hormone, can not only improve the quality of life and happiness for the individual but can also have a significant, positive impact on overall health and length of life. These drugs are often associated with illegal activities among athletes due to their potential for performance-enhancing effects if taken in higher doses than therapeutically recommended. Unfortunately, those who are prescribed these types of medications are also often rejected when seeking to participate in athletic events. Creating opportunities to include athletes across the gender spectrum has caused challenges and been the fodder for 8 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0

Photo provided by LGBT Powerlifting debate within leadership for a variety of sports. The LGBT Powerlifting Union was the first organization to adopt an evolutionary stance on including participation of those who may not follow the binary gender system or may rely on medications that are generally considered illegal in many sports. This union has been identified as one of the pioneers in LGBTQ inclusion within athletes with their efforts to create additional opportunities in the sport of powerlifting for people across the queer spectrum. They set themselves apart from other governing organizations in a few ways. Focus is placed on developing guidelines to encourage the inclusion of the wide variety of gender expressions in the LGBTQ community and those individuals who may have been unable to compete previously due to utilizing potentially performance-enhancing drugs for gender modification purposes or treating chronic conditions like HIV. There is little consensus about the most effective or fair ways to deal with these challenges. Many athletic organizations are faced with scrutiny regarding their policies to be responsive how their policies address changing needs of athletes wishing to compete. Unfortunately, change often happens slowly. For example, USA Powerlifting describe themselves as an “inclusive organization for all athletes and members who comply with its rules, policies, procedures, and bylaws.” They later go on to acknowledge that they are “not a fit for every athlete and for every medical condition or situation.” This statement refers to eligibility requirements that impact the participation of transgender individuals and other athletes in events sanctioned by USA Powerlifting. This is where innovative organizations like the LGBT Powerlifting Union come into play. Now based in Blackpool, England, this global union formed an advisory and advocacy group to support the evolution of contest regulations. The aim is to allow for inclusion of transgender athletes in powerlifting for both the LGBT International Powerlifting Championships in 2020 as well as the 2022 Gay Games in Hong Kong.


This combination of athletes, coaches, and event producers holds ongoing stakeholder meetings and shares perspectives on how best to conceptualize and provide a safe, supportive space for LGBTQ athletes to share their passion, strength, and courage to embrace their full selves without concern of judgment or dismissal. Last year, they welcomed more than 50 competitors from countries such as Great Britain, the United States, Australia, France, Iceland, Belgium, Ireland, Germany, and Romania to compete in the international contest. These new policies focus on ensuring that competitions remain fair but also provide opportunities to be inclusive of those interested in participating. Other sports appear to also struggle with evolving their policies and practices to be additionally supportive. Although far from perfect, the union’s effort is a crucial step in the evolution of inclusivity and to keep these important conversations going. Beyond the athletic aspects of this group, it is also about creating opportunities for inclusion, visibility, friends, and to boost self-esteem regardless of an individual's sexuality or gender. They also take a progressive stance regarding gender expression. In addition to the two common classifications of competitors being male (M) and female (F), they are proud to be the first sporting event in the world to introduce a third gender category designated as “MX” that was created to support the inclusion and participation of those identifying as gender-fluid, intersex, or nonbinary. They also identify the importance of offering opportunities to anyone regardless of their gender, orientation, size, age, or health status to compete against their peers in a safe environment without fear of discrimination. Ben Gilliam is Colorado’s most notable, out, gay powerlifter and a member of Team USA in the LGBT Powerlifting Union. In addition to his many successes in commercial real estate and championing social justice causes, Gilliam also describes some of his proudest achievements related to his history in athletics. He won LGBT International Powerlifting competitions in 2017, 2018, and 2019 and describes his involvement in the sport as a “metaphor for life, in terms of seeking growth and strength to become a better human who could help others discover their strength and channel it for a good purpose.” In addition to the physical increases, he also gained emotional, psychological, and social benefits. Through training and competing in the “straight” world, he was fortunate to make friends who also became his allies when we came out as gay in a time and environment when and where being openly gay was less common, and fear of discrimination kept many LGBTQ athletes in the closet. Of course, there is still a long way to go regarding equality in gender representation in many arenas including sports, but it is encouraging that certain organizations such as the LGBT Powerlifting Union are pushing those boundaries. It is through these changes that all individuals have opportunities to seek personal growth and strength through being themselves. O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 9


By Arianna Balderrama

Queering the

Playing Field Youth in Sports by Arianna Balderrama

A

thletics are often the first step into youth socialization, but for queer youth, they can instead be scary and triggering. Micah Porter wants to change that.

school-wide policies about inclusion and language,” he said. “Everything from using dehumanizing terms in the locker room toward women, gay and lesbian athletes, to language the fans may use in the stands.”

Porter is an assistant principal at Almeda International working on creating a safer space for LGBTQ athletes in schools. His advocacy reaches coaches and administrators to further enhance the security of our youth. Porter has extensive experience as an educator, from positions as a coach to an assistant principal. He received a scholarship to run track in high school and even dove into other activities, but Porter’s passion for sports and inclusion comes from personal experience and did not end there.

It is no surprise sports provide fertile ground for homophobia to flourish. Out On The Fields surveyed 9,500 people about their experiences in sports tied to homophobia. Seventy-eight percent believed team sports for our youth are not safe for lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals. This belief bleeds into the security of the students. Many athletes remain in the closet due to the fear of discrimination from their peers and coaches.

“Adults need a lot of education in the athletic world about locker room talk and creating very explicit team policies, 1 0 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0

Language also plays a huge part in the unsettling atmosphere surrounding sports. Homophobic slurs are often used. Eighty-nine percent of gay men have

heard terms such as “f*ggot” being used in the world of athletics. These terms are often used to degrade someone’s performance by comparing it to words with softer connotations rather than ones that possess “strength.” These negative connotations related to the LGBTQ community aren’t always that aggressive, however. Casual homophobia isn’t uncommon among our youth, so establishing zero tolerance for this kind of language can minimize negative signals toward other students. Trying to combat the negative stigmas associated with sports is often done by educating people on the subject matter. Language, in terms of the LGBTQ community, has changed rapidly, and many people in the educational realm lack the resources to better understand what is going on in the community.


Another major way to combat these stigmas is to make it clear that athletic students don’t have to just be athletes to fit in or be cool. “I was a college track athlete. I did everything from football, basketball, wrestling, cross country, baseball in high school. I also was in the band, and I love art, and I love to cook, things that might be outside of that whole jock environment. Young people should be able to express themselves and be who they are and also in sports, and not feel like they have to live up to some sort of traditional jock mentality to play,” he said. Porter has worked with Nike’s BETRUE Campaign and the You Can Play Project supporting this message. Nike’s campaign began in 2012 and continued through 2019. The purpose of BETRUE was to support organizations beneficial to the LGBTQ community. You Can Play works on altering locker room culture in order to create a welcoming space for students regardless of their gender identity and sexual orientation. Gender identity is scrutinized in the world of athletics. More than half of the total participants in the Out In The Fields survey stated they believed queer athletes are not accepted. Recently, in Connecticut, two transgender track athletes fought against a policy that would ban them from playing on the team with which they identify.

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Clearly, queer inclusion among school athletics, or lack thereof, is a situation that needs addressing. “There's been a lot of work done around trans-inclusion and the importance of supporting our trans students, and what 7225VH_AD_Verticle_Emphasis_3.375x4.625_R01.indd that looks like, and how that can be best implemented,” Porter added. “Colorado High School Activities Association has also been a national leader in terms of creating trans policies for athletes and allowing students to participate in the gender in which they identify. It has a very positive impact.” Porter doesn’t look like your typical sports enthusiast. He openly wears pins and has decor in his office to show that queer visibility is important. “The feedback that I get from students who are aware of my sexual orientation and how much it means to them to know that the adults in their lives are supportive of who they are, understand the importance of pronoun use, and how impactful language can be for a young person who is navigating gender identity or sexual orientation, is huge,” he said.

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Porter is also aware of the positive outcomes that athletics can bring. One of the aspects of athleticism that can carry a huge lesson is the concept of “positive results of failure.” By becoming aware of how our mishaps can shape us, failure can seem like less of a negative. “There's no guarantees. Injury and sickness can create disappointment and what we could deem as a failure, but those are the times where I know I grew the most as a person.” We could all benefit from the lessons sports can teach, even if we are never going to be professional athletes. The first step to making athletics inclusive for all is opening up the conversation and providing support and education. O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 1


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Results are only temporary. Truth: Each laser hair removal treatment will provide you with permanent results when done properly. That’s because during the treatment, a laser pulse is delivered directly to the hair follicle which destroys it so that it can never—ever— grow again. That being said, new hair follicles can become active for a variety of reasons such as pregnancy, menopause, age, or genetics, and new hair can grow. Most places that offer laser hair removal services sell packages of 6 or 9 sessions, you’ll just want to keep in mind that at these places you’ll probably need to buy more packages or pay touch-up fees down the road. Your best option is to find a place that offers unlimited laser hair removal sessions for life at no additional cost like Milan does.


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MILAN Laser Hair Removal ™ O OU UT TF FR R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 3


hou se by Addison Herron-Wheeler Photos by Stu Osborne

GIVESBLACKANDBROWN DRAGPERFORMERS THEÂ SPOTLIGHT

666 of

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e O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 5


“FROM THE BEGINNING, IALREADYKNEW I WANTED TO CREATE

A HOUSE OF MY OWN.” - Lisa Frank 666

1 6 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0


D

enver is blowing up as a national hotspot for drag, especially “alternative” drag that pushes boundaries when it comes performers’ identities, nonbinary aspects of their drag, and the experimental nature of their performances. But one thing that’s undeniable in the Mile High City is the lack of racial diversity. For that reason, local drag performer Lisa Frank 666 wanted to create a space where black and brown bodies were celebrated, not just acknowledged or accepted. “Since I started drag, being part of the House of Cortez really inspired me and instilled in me the family aspect of drag, which was my favorite thing about drag,” Lisa said. “I genuinely feel like if I wasn’t a part of a family at the beginning, then I wouldn’t be where I am now. So, from the beginning, I already knew I wanted to create a house of my own. Currently, all the members of Lisa’s new house, House of 666, are black and brown, and the goal is to make it a safe space for all people of color and put those who identify as black or POC front and center. The house came about because of Lisa’s love for community and support and the fact that the punk and drag scenes in Denver, two scenes she was drawn to, are predominantly white. To celebrate her new house, Lisa threw a show at Meadowlark called Spawn. “It was the House of 666 birthday show, and I literally birthed each of my new drag children on stage. I just felt like it was a very ritualistic and powerful moment for them, but also for me. I wanted them to have an actual moment, a birthday, something of importance that they can celebrate, and a day to remember. It was incredible.” The turnout and support so far for House of 666 has been great. After all, it’s a local drag house full of drag artists turning looks left and right. But, there’s more to this house than just looking fabulous and having each other’s backs. It’s a house or alternative, punk, and goth folks who are also people of color and/or black. It’s a safe space for those who are naturally marginalized based on the color of their skin, and then are further othered based on alternative aesthetic choices, and it’s family. “I love punk culture; I love the goth culture, and I love the alternative,” Lisa said. “But, as much as I've been welcomed by the scene here, I just started feeling kind of alone in the sense of being a person of color and a

black person in the drag scene in general, but especially in the alternative drag scene. But, there are great artists doing things in Denver who are also black and people of color, so I decided instead of feeling so alone, I should actually create something that lifts us up, something that other people can be a part of as well.” But it’s not all about art and branding for House of 666, either. They go beyond the aesthetic and the shared moniker of 666. “We genuinely all hang out and care for each other like an actual family, like we ask each other how we are, help each other financially in different ways. Everyone who’s in the house has felt alone in different ways in the community, and as people of color, I think it’s really important to have that sense of community and family.” Lisa made a point to stress that the drag family of House of 666 need to actually hang out outside of balls and shows. She wants them to learn each other as people and develop a support network. “It's really cool to see the friendships and the bonds, relationships, actually being there. It’s heartwarming that we laugh, enjoy each other’s company, and generally are there for each other.” While some drag houses pride themselves on exclusivity, limiting the number of members, that’s not Lisa’s plan. She wants to welcome in other people of color who vibe with the aesthetic of House of 666 and are looking for community and family. “I really hope it ripples out and continues to grow, because I can feel it in my bones that this is going to be huge. There’s never been an alternative, all-POC drag house like this. There may be other, alternative houses that have people of color, but this is something unique and special. I really want to inspire a lot more people of color to do alternative drag. And I would love to see more houses, more alternative families, coming together, like actually family, not just friends who get drunk or do shows, but family.” In the months and years to come, Lisa hopes to have a monthly show at a local venue, and maybe branch out to a couple of spots around town. But even more importantly, she wants to see her family continue to grow and bring representation to black drag performers in Denver, Colorado, and everywhere. Follow @lisafrank666 on Instagram for House of 666 updates.

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 7


Titt y Leaks 666

“BEING IN THIS ALL-BLACK AND -BROWN HOUSE HAS GIVEN ME ANOTHER OUTLET TO NOT ONLY

CONNECT WITH MORE QUEER POC, BUT ALSO TO CONTINUE TO SPEAK OUT

AGAINST THE RACISM

THAT WE ARE SO OFTEN

FACED WITH.”

Koffee Cakes 666

“MY HOUSE IS MY FAMILY, POINT BLANK, PERIOD.

I LOVE THEM. WHAT’S BETTER THAN MAKING ART WITH PEOPLE YOU LOVE?” 1 8 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0


Athena 666 Sylvers

"I JOINED THE HOUSE OF 666 BECAUSE I, LISA, AND MY DRAG SIBLINGS ARE ALL DOING DRAG THAT PUSHES BOUNDARIES AND QUESTIONS THE NORM. IT'S EXCITING BRINGING ART

TO THE STAGE THAT

NO ONE EXPECTS."

Craqwhora 666

"I AM WHO I AM BECAUSE OF MY ABILITY TO FULLY

LOVE AND EXPRESS MYSELF

THROUGH THE STRENGTH AND

RESILIENCE OF MY HOUSE.”

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 9


Vacía 666

“I FEEL LIKE AS A BROWN,

TRANS/NONBINARY PERSON, IT’S BEEN ESPECIALLY HARD TO FIND A SPACE WHERE I FELT WELCOME HERE IN DENVER. HOUSE OF 666 HAS BEEN MORE THAN JUST A

DRAG HOUSE FOR ME; WE ARE A FAMILY. I’M SO GRATEFUL TO BE A PART OF SOMETHING SO AMAZING

WITH THESE BEAUTIFUL HUMANS

I LOVE, WHERE WE CAN SHARE ALL OF OUR ART AND IDIOSYNCRASIES WITH YOU ALL. DENVER’S NEVER SEEN NOTHING LIKE THIS

BEFORE, BABY.”

Vacía 666, the house’s newest member, joined the group the night of their coming-out event. Also performing that night was Anka Shayne, the house godparent.

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ANKA SHAYNE

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 1


Diversity at

The Dinah

The Gender Discussion at the Largest, Ladies-Only Pool Party

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by Veronica L. Holyfield Photos by Molly Adams


F

rom resort-style sunbathing during the day to grinding it out on the dance floor with the best DJs, all while rubbing elbows with the hottest women on Earth, Club Skirts Dinah Shore Weekend has it all on lock.

party long before the original L Word was on TV, and it continues to grow each and every year. As they enter their 30th year in production, The Dinah has expanded not only the concept of ladiesonly events; it has become a must-attend for any female-identified queer person.

Without question, The Dinah has been the ultimate, lesbian destination pool

More than a weekend getaway under the sun, The Dinah is now a full-on,

five-day music festival with big-name, live acts. The Dinah also hosts the Black and White Ball which brings the nation’s hottest DJs, and even includes a night of standup comedy. Not only is there something for everyone, but The Dinah embraces a model which creates a safe space for everyone.

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 3


Yet, the question remains: at a womenonly event, how can every gender identity feel welcome? “The Dinah has always been an inclusive event, primarily for women, but welcoming our non-female friends who support us and believe in the importance of our voices,” said Mariah Hanson, creator of Club Skirts Dinah Shore Weekend. “The Dinah welcomes all who identify as women and ask that all of our guests embrace inclusivity for everyone, all the time.” As we shift conversation within the LGBTQ community and become more vocal about the spectrum of gender identity and expression, does a space like The Dinah create inclusion or exclusion for our nonbinary, genderfluid, and nonconforming family? When an entire weekend is dedicated to a gender-specific space, does mandatory gendering prove more painful than intended? The Dinah is rooted in feminism, as Hanson wanted to create a space where women could feel the freedom 2 4 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0

of expression amid community without fear. However, 30 years ago, when The Dinah held its first-ever lesbian party, it was built on a model of exclusivity. The specialness of what it was needed to be preserved, and through that, it has maintained its significance in the community.

When OUT FRONT spoke with Hanson last year just before The Dinah 2019, she emphasized the significance of community and how the power lies in how women inspire one another. “Connection is vital to our personal growth, and The Dinah offers such


amazing connections to other people. It reminds us of how much we really have in common, so much more than our differences, and it reminds us that kindness is contagious,” she said. Having worked toward three decades in crafting and preserving the safety of The Dinah’s mission, the needle is to be shifted again, as the need for queer spaces that are truly inclusive is rapidly growing. Connection, engagement, and entertainment—that’s what makes The Dinah so special. “We believe that everything is everything, and to act otherwise reduces the strength of our message. We cannot be inclusive to all women here, but not there. So, we work to protect the womenidentified space while making room for those who love us and support our need to have the strongest voices possible.”

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 5


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// 2 7


OUTCASTS, LEZBROS, AND SPRING BREAK

John Waters

at The Dinah

by Denny Patterson Photos provided by John Waters

I

conic filmmaker, director, writer, actor, and artist John Waters is taking a dive into the wonderful world of lesbians, as he performs at the upcoming Club Skirts Dinah Shore Weekend in April. Also known as The Dinah, this five-day weekend getaway and music festival has become an infamous spring break for queer ladies. This ultimate lesbian pool party offers nightly entertainment, live concerts, games, comedy shows, DJ battles, and celebrity meet-and-greets, all while providing a safe space for womenidentified folks to authentically connect with each other. It is a must-attend event. This year marks The Dinah’s 30-year anniversary, so audiences are expecting the best of the best. The Dinah is expanding their offerings to be more inclusive to LGBTQ folks, including those who are taking the stage. Waters was thrilled to be invited. “As a proud lezbro who has never been scared of women smarter than me, I am happy to be

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the comic relief in a sea of partying, all-girl, music festival fans,” he said. “Thanks to The Dinah, I will finally be a true outsider!” Known for his long career in entertainment, Waters has written and directed 16 movies, including Pink Flamingos, Hairspray, Desperate Living, Cry Baby, and Polyester. He is a photographer whose work has been displayed in galleries across the globe, a member of The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences and the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences, and an author of nine books. Waters gives advice on how to tackle your life and explores how being on the fringe of society has become chic and trendy in his latest memoir, Mr. Know-It-All: The Tarnished Wisdom of a Filth Elder, which was released last year. OUT FRONT had the opportunity to chat more with Waters about his upcoming appearance at The Dinah and how excited he is to party with the lesbians.


I THINK

THAT

NOBODY

IS TRYING TO CHANGE IT FROM AN ALL-WOMAN EVENT AT ALL, BUT AT THE SAME TIME, PUSHING THE BOUNDARIES A LITTLE BIT, WHICH I THINK IS HEALTHY IN TODAY’S WORLD.

Let’s begin by talking more about your upcoming appearance at The Dinah. What can we expect? You can expect a show I certainly address with humor. A male in a lesbian world! I have always been a fan of lesbian culture. I am fascinated by it, and I know it is a world that is hard to get in. It’s a lot easier these days because I think everybody, especially young people, are much more open and more receptive. So, I am looking forward to it and seeing what kind of humor will play. I have never played to an all-women group. I have played to all men in prison, but that’s a very different group, too. My show will be written for this audience completely. I have lots of different audiences. I recently did the John Waters Valentine’s Show, and I am doing the John Waters Easter show. I have a Christmas show, and I think Halloween will probably be next.

Why do you think you were selected to be the comic relief for this year’s event? I think I was picked to cross the line a bit, to shake things up. And since this is the 30-year anniversary, maybe it was time to widen it a little bit and to muddy the borders that might be keeping some people out. I think that nobody is trying to change it from an all-woman event at all, but at the same time, pushing the boundaries a little bit, which I think is healthy in today’s world.

What are you looking forward to the most about appearing at The Dinah, and what do you hope to take away from this experience? I want to see how lesbians party when they’re wild at night! I heard it gets pretty wild, Girls Gone Wild, only the other way around. I’m looking forward to seeing it.

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 9


Have you always considered yourself a proud lezbro? Yes, I think I always was. I made a weird movie about lesbians called Desperate Living a long time ago. I used to go to the lesbian bars in Baltimore that would not let men in, and there were some very frightening ones that I miss, actually! They were the opposite of a liberated women’s movement today. This was, like, really old school. Johnny Cash was quite the role model for many gay women in Baltimore in the 50s and 60s, but it was a blue-collar town. So, you would see a lot of women that looked a certain way, and this was way before trans people [were out]. This wasn’t any of that. I don’t think anyone even thought that was possible. So, that is kind of interesting today, too.

The Dinah is known as the infamous spring break for queer ladies. Do you have any outrageous spring break stories of your own? Well, I never went to spring break, but I love the idea! I thought this was like Woodstock for lesbians. I know in Provincetown where I live, every summer, we have Baby Dyke Weekend, which is Memorial Day, and that is what it is affectionately known as. That used to be hard partying, full of mostly college-aged girls, and they would be topless, fighting, drinking—they would have fun! They took over the whole town. So, that’s the only experience I have that might be a little close to it.

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I THINK

I WAS

PICKED

TO CROSS THE LINE A BIT, TO SHAKE THINGS UP. AND SINCE THIS IS THE 30-YEAR ANNIVERSARY, MAYBE IT WAS TIME TO WIDEN IT A LITTLE BIT AND TO MUDDY THE BORDERS THAT MIGHT BE KEEPING SOME PEOPLE OUT.

Thanks to your history and career, you have paved the way for LGBTQ voices to be more prevalent in today’s media and society. Do you think queer folk, women, and other outcasts are still struggling to fit in? That depends. The problem is, it has become a class issue. In rich kid schools, it’s better to be gay. I don’t know how it became a class issue, but it weirdly has. The acceptance of it.

Why is it great to be an outcast? Why should one strive to be different? I do not think one should strive to be an outcast. That’s trying too hard. If you aren’t one, you aren’t one. If you are a straight male, there is nothing you can do about it. You aren’t an outcast, so I guess you have to accept that. There is nothing you can do about it, and when it comes to kinds of political correctness; I think that is as ludicrous as some of the other stuff. That is why people vote for Trump because of some of his crazy political correctness. We got to win, then we can have those battles. Let’s win first. You do not win by making the opposition feel stupid. I think you have to learn how to negotiate your way through society, no matter what you are. High school is hell for everybody, and the only ones it isn’t hell for, their life is sh*tty already.

Lesbians play at men’s shows all the time, but we do not hear much about gay men

playing at lesbian shows too often. Why is performing at The Dinah so important to you? Because I don’t think any man has really done it. Has a man played and done a comedy show at The Dinah?

Not that I’m aware of. I like to be the first at something and doing something that nobody else has attempted to do. It’s like a daredevil stunt; I don’t have a safety net!

Do you think The Dinah would be an event Divine would enjoy? Yes, actually, I do. I think Divine would have loved it, but Divine didn’t want to be a woman, not really. He never wore drag except when he was being paid to do it. He said he was a fat person, and it was too hot wearing all this sh*t. Divine wanted to be a monster, not a woman. In Desperate Living, Divine was supposed to play the butch lesbian role, but couldn’t because he was doing a show. It would have been interesting to see if Divine did. Susan Lowe, who took the part, was not a lesbian or gay, but she gave up a lot to play the role of Mole.

What do you think the world would be like without lesbians today? Well, I can’t imagine that. We would not have an Armed Forces. We would have lost every war!

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 3 1


Are there any other projects you would like to plug or mention at this time? Oh, no, I am just mostly plugging this one. You know, I’m doing things all year. I have the John Waters Easter show; my book comes out in paperback in May, and that’s important to me because I’ll be doing a whole book tour. I always have stuff coming out; that is an exciting part of it. I just keep finding new ways to tell stories.

Yes, how has your new book, Mr. Know-It-All: The Tarnished Wisdom of a Filth Elder, been received by audiences? Great! It has actually gotten the best reviews of any book I have ever written. It’s been published in several different foreign countries, so it has been very exciting. The official Club Skirts Dinah Shore Weekend will take place in Palm Springs, CA April 1-5. For more information, visit thedinah.com.

I JUST

KEEP

FINDING NEW WAYS TO TELL STORIES.

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O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 3 3


to

ie s

R Id P en G tit s “Are you a boy or a girl?"

es am G s ity ow U e H elp lor r al H p de xu Ex en Se G d an

I

t's 1998, and you just got the first Pokémon game. You boot up the cartridge, and one of the very first things you're asked is:

Words and photos by Ray Manzari

Your siblings, your friends, all have no problem playing as the gender they identify as. But you hesitate and maybe even surprise yourself. There was a time where I thought a person's in-game avatar was supposed to look just like them in real life, but I'd like to think I'm more creative than that now. Tabletop games, or MMORPGs (massively multiplayer online role-playing games), afford a little more wiggle room compared to the gender binary presented by the original Pokémon games. These games give us the unique opportunity to play as people of different races (I'm talking elves and orcs) and different walks of life, from magic-users to barbarians. So, why not play with gender? Why not play with sexuality? In a world where players are casting spells, summoning demons, or traveling through the expanse of space, who's to say which gender roles or sexual orientations are “normal?” Tabletop games refer to turn-based, roleplaying games where players are immersed in a world, usually with elements of fantasy or science fiction. The game is led by a Dungeon Master (DM) or Game Master (GM) who is tasked with world-building, creating conflict, and driving a story. 3 4 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0

Meaning, the person leading your game is right in front of you. This type of gameplay allows for a lot more freedom, both for players and the DM. When you’re not constricted to the game developers’ world-building or character creator, the possibilities become endless. This also means that most RPG parties or groups will be made up of close friends, making game play an intimate and safe space for players to stretch out their imagination. Don’t identify as L, G, B, or T? Don’t sweat it. The best part about role-playing is that you don’t have to play a character that is anything like you. A great way to become a better ally to your queer and gender nonconforming friends is to walk a mile (or a couple thousand) in their shoes, as long as your role-play doesn’t rely on performative or harmful stereotypes. Lately, tabletop games like Dungeons and Dragons have become increasingly mainstream. That could be because the collective social consciousness is waking up to how fun these games can be, or it could be because of the inclusive mechanics that allow players to tell their own story, however they'd like to tell it.


For me, my inclination to transition was preceded directly by an inclination to play as a gay, Japanese man in Monster of the Week, a tabletop game focused around hunting the supernatural in the modern world. This got me thinking: Could others have had similar experiences within a role-playing game? So, I took to the internet and began asking for stories, and folks had plenty of wonderfully weird and fun tales about how game mechanics or personal choice affected how their characters interacted with other players or NPCs (non-playable characters). The ven-diagram of nerd culture and LGBTQ culture is everoverlapping, and seeing what RPGs have to offer players as far as expression goes, it's easy to see why. Whether you're looking to explore your own identity or want to get in the headspace of another role in order to be a better ally, RPGs have provided a space for this exploration.

CHARLIE, THEY/THEM/THEIRS "I had rolled a bard with a randomly generated flaw that made him attracted to any NPC with a charisma score of 14 or higher. Roleplaying that out and giving that character life sort of helped me come to terms with my own pansexuality."

ANONYMOUS HE/HIM/HIS "I've volunteered to DM games solely to role play as female characters without drawing attention to myself. I'm still figuring out who I am, but RPGs give me a space to play with gender roles ‘til I figure it out."

JOJO, THEY/THEM/THEIRS "I definitely experimented with gender identity via RPG characters. I started identifying as agender in 2016, but prior to that, I had a string of non-binary characters. I think it helped me figure out my identity—being able to role play as non-binary, genderless characters was a way to test the fit." TAYLOR, SHE/HER/HERS "I was afraid to play as a female character around other people IRL, so for a long time, I stuck to online RPGs to explore different genders. Being accepted by the people who knew me online, even after coming out, gave me the courage to transition in my personal life." KATI, SHE/HER/ HERS "One of my characters received a cursed item that changed their gender from female to male. At first, I wasn't sure how to handle it. Do I get my cleric to change them back? Do I start playing them more masculine to fit the new role? In the end, I chose not to change my character's personality but to start playing them as a trans woman. It may not be how I identify, but it felt more authentic to the character."

12.99

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 3 5


ArtHistory

by Rylee Thomas

Queer

4 Trans/Gender Nonconforming Artists You Should Know About Queer artists may be making headlines now, with trans and nonbinary folks, tearing up the underground art scene, but that’s nothng new. Folks who don’t conform to gender norms have been making art for much, much, longer than bending gender has been common. Here are a few you need to know.

Frida Kahlo

Frida Kahlo was one of the most influential painters of the 20th century, known for her striking, surrealist self-portraits that explored her own identity, sexuality, and personal life. Several of Kahlo’s works show her depicted with masculine traits (Self Portrait with Cropped Hair, 1940), and in family photographs, teenage Kahlo can be seen wearing her father’s suits.

Mark Aguhar

Mark Aguhar’s work as a femme-identified, transgender artist operates under the context of interdeterminacy, qualities vague and unknown to a heteronormative binary structure. Her work, especially pieces such as Litanies to my heavenly brown body, 2011, and Not You (Power Circle), 2011, de- and reconstruct her concept of self as a fat, femme, trans person of color. She pursues visibility in her identity and how to dismantle the systems of dominance put in place to police queer bodies. Through humor, tenderness, vulnerability, and rage, Aguhar’s art questions the “glossy glorification of the gay, white, male body” and seeks intersectionality in the acceptance of LGBTQ identities.

The accentuation of her unibrow and moustache in her self-portraits challenged notions of traditional, feminine beauty while also acknowledging the masculine energy she recognized in her own identity.

Kent Monkman/Miss Chief Eagle Testickle

Cree artist Kent Monkman uses his work in performance, installation, painting, and video to explore the complexities of historical and contemporary, indigenous identity. Monkman’s gender-fluid alter ego, Miss Chief Eagle Testickle, appears in his work quite frequently as a supernatural character born from the indigenous recognition of a third gender, or “two-spirit” individuals. Prior to colonization, indigenous cultures held great respect for androgynous, intersex, and gender-nonconforming individuals, and highly prioritized the spirit over the body. Miss Chief’s presence in Monkman’s work acts as the “decolonization of gender,” as heteronormativity was violently imposed onto indigenous populations by colonizers from the West. Monkman’s work subverts the colonial gaze and explores gender nonconformity in indigenous identities.

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Claude Cahun

As a French sculptor, photographer, and writer, Claude Cahun worked to subvert the traditions of static gender roles in the early 20th century. In many of Cahun’s selfportraits, gender indicators and behaviors are obscured in order to undermine the patriarchal gaze and social obsession with the gender binary. Their work, though attached to surrealist groups of Europe and receiving decent exposure, was not well-known until almost 40 years after their death. Cahun’s existence alone acted as a political statement about society’s expectations of gender expression, but their representations of gender nonconformity have influenced the visibility of queer art to this day.


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www.letsescape.com O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 3 7


is Nonlinear

Transition by Mara Luther

Photo by Stu Osborne 3 8 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0


W

hen I allowed myself to claim my gender identity, I learned that trans narratives are limiting and reductive. Once deciding to pursue medical transition, I quickly learned that the expectation of the trans body is suffocatingly simple. As a trans woman, my journey is from male to female, a once dishonest identity to a now-authentic one, or as a cis person grossly put it, from a “wrong set of equipment to the right one.” The assumed linearity of transness—point A to point B— opposes the single, consistent truth about transition that I’ve learned so far: every individual transition is its own. As long as gender operates within the binary, transitions will be reduced to a limited expectation of the trans identity. I often find myself wishing my transition would speed itself up, mostly in regard to my middle school, training bra, Limited Too breasts. On the other hand, I have a hard time keeping up with the constant emotional and mental changes. Love is Blind was a rollercoaster. My dysphoria has skyrocketed, as I now understand my body in a whole new light. The small list of changes I considered making has lengthened into a much longer list after watching hundreds of beforeand-after transition YouTube videos. While publicly exploring my identity four years ago, I never imagined starting hormones, and now I’ve been taking them for a year and a half. Transitioning has never been a clear and easy, step-by-step process—Transitioning for Dummies has yet to be published. The ways in which I expressed myself in the beginning of my social transition look drastically different from the ways I desire to express myself now. On my most dysphoric days, scrolling through old photos and cringing about my many different hairstyles, I sometimes chuckle, but am always reminded of how every expression has been necessary to my transition. Every identity of mine holds its own joy and pain. Taking the time to explore and hold each identity led me to better understand myself in the present moment. Perhaps my most authentic self is in fact one that looks more binary. Aligning myself with a traditional image of femininity offers a level of security and ease to my existence as a trans woman. I don’t want to walk down the street and be clocked as “other,” and one day, I hope to be loved and not fetishized. For other trans individuals, maybe their most authentic self is being as visibly trans as possible, their identities being a reminder that contentment of one’s self does not have to be centered around other people’s expectations. Our transitions in life, whether centered around our identity or not, do not always have to be pretty and tidy. It’s not about the before-and-after pictures and surely cannot be explained in one op-ed. I write this as a reminder to myself and to you, the reader, that wherever we are in our transition, and whatever our transition looks like, it is exactly what it needs to be.

O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 3 9


UNDERSTANDING the

G ender S pectrum

by Adam Ross

R

ecently, I had a conversation with a young lady merely 15 years my junior. She informed me that she identifies as genderqueer, nonconforming, and Hufflepuff Mother of Dragons. Half those words went over my head. Before rushing to condemn me as ignorant, let me explain. Growing up in the early 90s, there were two genders that were dominant and widely acknowledged in society—male and female. At the time, I was moving on from elementary to middle school, walking through puberty, and denying my budding interest in men. Did I choose to ignore the gender spectrum? Not consciously. Instead, those around me never brought it up, so I continued to live in my bubble. “Gender identity” and “gender spectrum” were terms that surfaced in the 1960s. That’s a lot of time—more than 50 years—before I had this conversation with my genderqueer friend. While it is difficult for me to grasp new concepts that challenge themes I was born and raised to know as the only way, I am not so closed-minded that I can’t be taught. I asked her to explain herself and then proceeded to share with her what I just

4 0 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0

did with you. Thankfully, she graciously understood and was so very patient with me. She listened to my questions and explained her answers thoroughly, thus opening my eyes to the gender spectrum, something I knew existed but never really understood. What I cherish about this experience is that we were both honest, and we were both open-minded enough to learn about the other in order to co-exist more peacefully. Being that out community (the LGBTQ community) is one that has been through a thing or two, we should be paving the way toward social peace and have each other’s backs. That being said, I was extremely hesitant to even broach the topic with her after she made her identifying statement. As I write this, I’m nervous that I am not referring to her correctly, and that I will be chastised for confusing my words. Here’s the thing: I’m not being malicious or slanderous. I simply don’t know enough. I have not been exposed to the gender spectrum for very long. In the bit of research I have done, there are a slew of identities out there. Should I be reprimanded for my small amount of knowledge? Or should I

be understood, just like I am trying to better understand people who grew up with these terms? My genderqueer friend provided us with a fantastic example of how we can move forward in society. With grace and patience. But it also applies to people my age and older—we need to park our egos and not brush off this new(ish) way with frustration. Instead, take a breath, and admit you don’t know, and then listen. In the end, we may not see all the light, but we’ll see enough to build a bridge and strengthen our community so that we can better be there for each other. Through patience, understanding, and dare I say friendliness, I think the frustration and confusion around the gender spectrum can become obsolete in this conversation. I had that conversation two years ago, and already, we’ve come a long way. So, let’s continue to make our rainbow shine. Be good to each other, and let’s light each other’s way.


O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 4 1


X

F

AMERICAN

A

>>>>>>>

QUEER LIFE

C

Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall ... Are We Our Faces? >>>>>>>>>>>>>>

O

by Rick Kitzman

4 2 \\ M A R C H 1 8 , 2 0 2 0

E

O


H

ell’s Kitchen, summer 1981, New York City. Just a few steps away from my apartment simmered Tar Beach. I roasted in the sweltering humidity, slathered in a concoction of baby oil and iodine for a deep, rich tan to look good for Fire Island. I might as well have been marinating myself as spit-roasted meat for KFC: Kentucky Fried Cannibals. I loved the beach, pool, and tanning beds, convenient solar coffins to bake in a radioactive, lavender glow. Burning quickly, fair-skinned and green-eyed, I was a textbook candidate for future trouble. In 2016, I saw a dermatologist to remove a plethora of moles that looked like constellations. What are the crab stars called? Oh yeah, Cancer. The doctor fixated on a growth under my eye: flesh-colored, the circumference of a pencil eraser, round and flat. When he said “Uh-oh,” I knew I was in trouble. Yep, melanoma, a serious skin cancer that can spread to other organs. Within three months, I had a hole the size of a quarter under my eye. A week later, a lymphadenectomy removed infected lymph glands, giving me a zipper-neck on my left side. Following that scare, two aliens emerged: hideous, cancerous bulges on a hand and my chest. They were removed through Mohs surgery, a progressive procedure requiring wide and deep cutting. During the surgery on my hand, I looked at the gouge. When I moved my fingers, I saw my tendons pull, just like Ahnold in Terminator 2, when he sliced and peeled his forearm to uncover his robotic skeleton. Last summer, I had my face burned off. This Blue Light Special had nothing to do with a K-Mart sale. A nurse sandpapered my face with a dry loofah sponge, put goop on my face, then sat me in front of a blue light for 16 minutes. Within two days, my face looked like I had smeared moldy oatmeal and mozzarella cheese on top of cherry jam. When I went to work, my boss stepped back and cried, “Oh my God! What happened to you?” I stayed home. Am I just my face? Are all of us just our faces? Of course, the answer is no. We are much more than our faces. Historical records reveal The Elephant Man was intelligent and sensitive, but yikes! Our faces are what we present to the world, and from birth, the world tells us if it approves or disapproves. And there it is: beauty. Leave it to the ancient Greeks to devise a formula of beauty’s perfection. Called Phi, the golden ratio of beauty—1.618:1— measures the symmetry of a subject’s face. Their athletic gods and gorgeous goddesses were mathematically sculpted to physical perfection. Modern, computerized algorithms confirm the calculations of these creators of Western ideals of beauty, opening a new Pandora’s box: facial recognition. The ability to identify a person via a picture could be a boon to crime fighters or Big Brother. Someday, we won’t need a license or passport. Click. “Mr. Kitzman, step out of the car.”

face masks, showing off that 50-buck lipstick or $10k rhinoplasty could become risky. Sometimes neither makeup nor surgery matters. We all know a beautiful person, conceited and cruel, who becomes ugly, and a homely person, kind and funny, who becomes beautiful. We can blame parents. Genetics plays its cruel, random role, as does addiction and disease. I knew a handsome man who succumbed to meth; he was barely recognizable. Ravaging faces, AIDS forced gay men to reevaluate their most valued currency: again, beauty. To a degree, that’s all we had to barter: our face, body, and costume on display where gay men gathered. When I was young, the Castro Street clone was de-rigueur. I desperately tried to conform but never pulled it off. I vividly remember the anguish I felt at not being hot enough, which in retrospect seems like such a waste. Because I was good enough, smart enough, and doggonit, people liked me! (Thank you, Stuart Smalley.) Figuring out what face we want to present to the world is a lifelong pursuit. We bravely, awkwardly experiment in our youth. In the 90s, I was an human resource director for a call center. The goth movement was in full swing, or full puncture. Tongue studs, nose rings, and heavy gauge eyebrow rings were the accoutrement of rebellion and self-expression. I met sweet, smart, young men and women who were certainly more than their faces. The business owners didn’t care about their metallic jewelry because these employees worked on phones using their “smiling voices.” I live during another cultural awakening. Today’s youth have added the Q to LGBTQ, declaring a smorgasbord of gender identity and sexual preference. Their achievement goes way beyond the faces of epicene tomboys and pretty boys, furthering awareness of the infinite variety of humanity. Also in our community, drag queens have decided with gusto for decades what faces they present to the world. I’ve never done drag; I had the cheekbones, but never the balls. I love people-watching at airports, stores, on the street, at the theatre or work. I pass many judgments—we all do; yes, you do!—and they of me: race, religion, sexuality, gender, attractiveness, to name a few. Getting beyond judgments during rare interactions, I’ve been amazed at what individuals unveil: humor, tragedy, astonishing achievements or talents, their humanity. Four out of five senses reside above the neck and provide us with feedback and expression of and in our world. Yet, we never see ourselves in the world. It would be awkward walking around with a mirror dangling from a hat, not to mention dangerous, but that’s what we do with our phones, selfies substituting mirrors for verification that, yes, I exist in the world.

Though ideals of beauty change weekly it seems, search the web to find consistent confirmation that beautiful people are generally happier, healthier, and wealthier. What does that mean for the rest of us?

My verification comes at bedtime, lying next to my partner, Neil. I’m amazed this beautiful man lies next to me. Beauty in the eyes of this beholder declares I’m a lucky, lucky man. And I’m lucky, after my face burn and peeling off sheets of solar keratoses, those brown, scaly bumps from sun damage (you know, old-age spots), to have a smooth, pink face. It’ll do quite nicely.

You may have had plastic surgery, one of 17.7 million in 2018 just in the U.S., or added your dollars to the global beauty industry, worth almost $550 billion. In this time of the coronavirus and

With all the billions who have lived before us, no one has ever had your face. No one has it today; no one ever will in the future. Celebrate it; take care of it. And stay out of the sun! O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 4 3


DASHBOARD CONFESSIONAL OGDEN THEATRE

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