CO LO R A D O'S LG B TQ M AGA ZINE | F R E E
O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1
CONTENTS JUNE 3, 2020 VOL44 NO5
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6 THE DRU PROJECT CELEBRATES QUEER LIVES AND REMEMBERS PULSE 8 LIVING QUEER IN GREYSCALE : SURVIVING CORPORATE SETTINGS WITH YOUR QUEERNESS INTACT 10 WE’RE ALL STORYTELLERS HERE: TRANSMASCULINE MEMOIRS & PANDEMIC READING LISTS 12 PAISLEY FIELDS IS PUTTING THE FRINGE AND FRILLS IN COUNTRY MUSIC 14 BLACK, GAY, AND VISIBLE: J. AUGUST RICHARDS 16 YOU’VE HEARD OF LIP SYNC FOR YOUR LIFE? TRY HOWLING FOR YOUR HEALTH 20 KEEPING THE FAITH WITH MELISSA ETHERIDGE 24 INTRODUCING: THE FUTURE OF CANNABIS 26 AMERICAN QUEER LIFE: SINGING THE COVID COOTIE BLUES 29 HEINZESIGHT: TALK IS CHEAP
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the
DRU project CELEBRATES QUEER LIVES AND REMEMBERS PULSE by Denny Patterson
“H
e was a best friend to everybody he met. It didn’t matter who you were, where you were from, or what you were into.”
That is how Sara Grossman remembers Christopher Andrew “Drew” Leinonen, one of the 49 victims who lost their lives on June 12, 2016 after a mass shooter entered Pulse Nightclub in Orlando, FL. Wounding 53 more, this event is now the deadliest incident in the history of violence toward LGBTQ people. The shooter was killed by police after a three-hour standoff. Grossman and a couple other friends launched a nonprofit called The Dru Project shortly after, as a way to best honor Leinonen’s memory. "We took that energy and created this organization to help support LGBTQ youth,” she continued. “Essentially, our mission is to help empower LGBTQ youth and honor Drew and help spread love. Esentially, our mission is to help empower LGBTQ youth, honor drew, and help spread love." The Dru Project has raised more than $100,000 since its inception. Leinonen first met Grossman when she was a freshman at the University of Central Florida in Orlando. “Drew was one of the first friends I made,” she recalled. “I went to the first Gay/Straight Alliance meeting that was offered for new freshmen, and that is essentially where I met most of my close friends in college. Drew and his roommate came up to me after the meeting and said they liked my shirt or something, and that was basically that.” The day of the Pulse shooting and a couple days after, Grossman received messages from close, college friends thanking her and Leinonen. 6 \\ J U N E 3 , 2 0 2 0
“He and I were kind of like the mom and dad introducing the new, baby gays into the group,” Grossman said. “People would say how comfortable they felt with who they are because Drew and I were there, how they were able to go to gay clubs and feel safe about it. Obviously, it was too late for him to do anything with that information, but I knew I had to do something to keep his legacy moving.” Grossman will never forget the horror she felt when she first learned of the Pulse shooting. “It’s an interesting story,” she said. “I am not a person who sleepwalks, and around 1 a.m. Denver time, my dog had woken me up to go outside. I remember going through the motions of putting on my shoes and taking him outside. Somebody waved to me, but I didn’t pay attention because I was essentially sleepwalking. I got back in bed, and I didn’t check my phone, which is also weird. This was about the time that everything was happening in Orlando. “Then, I woke up around 9 a.m. Denver time, which obviously puts me a little bit behind Eastern Time, but I had, like, 20 missed calls, 30 text messages, a ton of Facebook messages from people in Florida, people from home, people we went to college with, all asking if I’ve heard from Drew, if I’ve heard about Orlando, I’m so sorry, when was the last time I went to Pulse. It was like this wave of what the hell? What happened? “I opened Facebook and saw the news everywhere that there was a shooting at Pulse,” she continued. “I was like, ‘Pulse was a place that I went to all the time in college.’ It was our favorite club; it was the coolest spot. It was just somewhere that we could be ourselves, and that hurt. Then, to find out that I had a friend who was there and still missing at this point, I just lost it. I spent most of the day talking with college
friends trying to get in touch with Drew, trying to figure out what the hell happened. Unfortunately, he was the very last person to be announced dead. It was, like, a good 15 to 24 hours before we heard anything, and that it was confirmed.” Leinonen’s partner Juan Guerrero was also one of the 49 victims. “Juan made it to the hospital,” Grossman explained. “The autopsy reports unfortunately told us that it is probably because Drew shielded him on the dance floor. Between the two of them, they took, like, eight or nine bullets.” Grossman currently serves as The Dru Project’s communications director. No stranger to gun violence prevention advocacy and LGBTQ advocacy, she previously worked with One Colorado, the Gill Foundation, and the Matthew Shepard Foundation. “At the time, I was doing a lot of freelance brand management and social media work,” she said. “I was working for a couple different startups, and when I got back from Drew’s funeral, they canceled all of my contracts because I was so griefstricken. I didn’t know what to do with myself. Then, about a month after realizing that maybe I need to pay my bills, I was like, ‘Maybe I need to get back into advocacy work.’ I went to the Colorado nonprofit job board, and five minutes prior to going to the website, the Matthew Shepard Foundation position had been posted. Spending three years there, who better to learn how to honor than from Dennis and Judy Shepard?” Founded in Florida, The Dru Project is now an entity in Colorado. Grossman says many people, especially in Denver, have reached out asking how to get involved. Known to hold multiple fundraisers and events, The Dru Project’s most recent event helped raise more than $21,000 for COVID-19 relief. Organizations like One Pulse Foundation and One Orlando Alliance sprung up due to the Pulse shooting, but Grossman believes The Dru’s Project’s heartfelt based story is what makes them beneficial.
hand prints on their person, so the Shepards put their hand prints on Matthew, while I put mine on Drew.” Pulse is now a memorial and will soon be turned into a museum to honor the victims as well as educate people on LGBTQ hate crimes and violence. Leinonen was a mental health counselor by trade and a graphic designer by hobby. Grossman often wonders what he would be doing today if he was still alive. “I think he would be very vocal right now about how disappointed he is with Donald Trump and the way he has handled basically everything since the inception of his presidency,” she said. “I think because he was an ardent Hillary supporter, he would be very vocal about that. He would probably still be helping as a mental health therapist, or maybe he would be doing something directly with LGBTQ youth by now. It’s hard to say, but I like to think that we are pushing forward the legacy that he would be proud of. “A lot of people, when they go through this kind of grief and lose somebody so close to them, they can either turn in or lash out,” she continued. “The fact that we have gotten as far as we have right now is proof of moving anguish into advocacy. The Dru Project has not only helped with my grief personally, but I can tell you that we have touched so many people with this story who have been willing and wanting to help. From drag queens in West Hollywood who threw a huge event called Gun Violence is a Drag in January, to celebrities who have come and performed at our events like Jonathan Bennett, we are just so thankful to everybody who has participated in The Dru Project with such open hearts and minds. We are very thankful.” For more information and to get involved, visit thedruproject. org. Also, keep an eye out on their social media, as they will be rolling out two weeks of digital content leading up to the Pulse four-year anniversary.
“Drew was somebody who the One Pulse Foundation now calls the Angel of Acceptance because he truly was friends with everybody,” she said. “I mean, over 1,000 people showed up to his funeral. Something coincidental is that the Westboro Baptist Church decided that out of all the funerals, they were going to come and protest his. So, LGBT+ Center Orlando put together a bunch of angel wings similar to the ones that were at Matthew Shepard’s funeral. There is also the weird coincidence that there is a huge memorial painting that depicts all of the 49 victims, as well as other important people in the LGBTQ universe. “When I went to visit it for the first time, my jaw dropped because right behind Drew and Juan was a portrait of Matthew Shepard looking over them. It all lined up, and the artist obviously didn’t know that there was any connection between Drew and me and the Matthew Shepard Foundation. I was very honored to be able to go down with the Shepards to Orlando two years ago. The artist has loved ones put their O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 7
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hose queerness is visible whether they want it to be or not; raise your hand? This is for those readers who either cannot pass, or those who can and consciously choose not to. I’ve spoken with multimedia artists, software engineers, and business owners. I’ve spoken with members of our community who work in just about every industry, from healthcare and education to Big Oil and space tech. I’ve spoken to people belonging to multiple ethnic groups and people possessing a wide range of socioeconomic statuses. I asked them the question, “How free are we to be ourselves in this land that purportedly holds freedom as one of its foundational values?” People like a petroleum engineer who’s worked in the oil industry for over 20 years and joyfully describes herself as “so f*cking gay” to anyone who asks. People like a queer, digital marketing manager who’s trying to start an LGBTQ pride group in a Fortune 500 space tech company way behind the times. People like a nonbinary, healthcare professional whose favorite patient travels more than 60 miles to get their hormones at age 76. The answer, like the question, is complex and different for each person. These queer professionals and many others stand out as beacons in their workplaces. As most openly queer people have experienced at least once in this day and age, the word “professional” used in a business setting is usually synonymous with cisheteronormative, classist, racist, sexist, fatphobic, and ableist ideals, especially when it comes to the standards and practices of dress and decorum. These unfortunate standards are commonplace among even the most selfassured, progressive companies. Take, for instance, hair. My hair, while considered beautiful in its own right, somehow becomes unprofessional when gendered male. I don’t wish to give in to conceit, but it is a fact that my hair has received compliments from both fellow 8 \\ J U N E 3 , 2 0 2 0
land
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hotel employees as well as hotel guests, yet when styled in particular ways, it becomes unacceptable because I am viewed as a man there. Which is one of the reasons why I’m out at work as queer but still not out as myself, a transgender woman, unless any of my coworkers read this magazine. When the man who is literally in charge of my hotel’s brand came a’callin, my first thoughts were: How openly queer can I appear to this corporate, cis, white man? What’s his queer barometer; how “unprofessional” will he deem me to be? I never got to answer any of those questions. The company changed my schedule just beforehand so that I would be posted as far away from him as I possibly could be. Visibility matters, and forced invisibility hurts. Even though I wasn’t fully out, I still felt shuttered, othered, and literally ostracized. This kind of story, unfortunately, is not an uncommon one. Dress codes often subject queer people to undue stress and “subdues fabulosity and sexuality,” according to a food and Keiko B, a queer, beverage supervisor medical case for a local, Denver manager serving hotel chain. populations with HIV, say implementing a dress code “often feels like asking us to leave a massive part of ourselves at home, like our identities are hobbies we can check at the door.” Even when they aren’t formal but gendered, they make it very difficult for nonbinary and agender people. D, the nonbinary, transmasculine healthcare professional, had the trans flag emblazoned on their resume as a watermark, and the company that hired them is patently and apparently a very progressive one.
Their direct supervisor is welcoming and inclusive, yet this titan has a real problem with their HR department and union reps when it comes to deadnaming their trans, nonbinary, and agender employees. This corporation has more than $2.2 billion in total assets, it provided nearly one billion health services to patients in 2018, but somehow, for some reason, “real compassion or inclusion,” is impossible to come by for the employees of this revered company, and many companies stride the same casually cruel path. “Being out and trans is f*cking hard, and it’s f*cking hard even if you have everything going for you,” said a working professional at a Denver Museum, who wishes to remain anonymous.
it’s possible to be authentic in yourself AND be successful,” and if her three-year-old brainchild’s success is anything to go by, she is right.
These are but a few examples of the crass, seemingly unavoidable double-standards that plague the schemas of “professional” workplaces. An agender, mechanical engineer on the Pride planning committee at an American multinational technology company said, “Progress takes work,” and that’s the truth, but we all have to be willing to do the work, and safe spaces are something everyone can work toward. I’ve spoken to two queer, Denver teachers, both of whom have helped young queerlings (as I like to call them) feel secure in their gender exploration.
“If not me, who, who is gonna stand up?” is her mentality. Existing in a relatively conservative environment like Miami, she brushes up against bigotry often, and she claims sterile, quick business interactions are a saving grace, as is “Checking online profiles. You can never escape what you do online.” Both of these outstanding women stressed the importance of having an authentic personal brand, regardless of industry or queer visibility. Hopefully, navigating these treacherous waters will become vastly easier in the near future.
But, young queerlings aren’t the only ones who ever need help, surely. Heather T., a queer, medical underwriter at a publically traded healthcare company said, “Dress codes at best become performative, and at worst, they are an act of oppression. They say that this person or their identity isn’t valid and can be punished... The energy I spent hiding is better spent helping others. Being open, passing the mic, etc. How I feel about me is far more important than how others feel about me.” As the queerest white person on my hotel’s staff (re: the only openly queer, white person), I consider it my duty to make my hotel as safe a space as I can make it, but as a transgender woman, how safe is the space for me? My rainbow glasses are a dead giveaway to my queerness, and purposefully so. These acoutrements often make cameos in negative reviews of me, and I will read more than 100 of them for every, single queer person who visibly relaxed when they saw me at the front desk. I am a welcoming presence More queer people are and possess a measure getting into positions of of power over my power these days, and as an guests’ experiences. independent contractor and co-founder of the New Orleansbased Southern Organizer Academy remarked, “Trans and queer people’s spiritual DNA is one of enduring and thriving; we’ve always found ways to exist in ways that kept us safe and still on the road to liberation, and that same, spiritual DNA is yours to draw upon!”
Kaia Rhodes is an entrepreneur based in Miami with more than 20 years experience in multiple industries. She has worked for herself the majority of her career, and has done business with multiple, Fortune 500 companies. She is a self-made mogul, an inspiration to trans women in business, and she says stylistically, she touts the middle-ground because otherwise, it could negatively affect her business, but she encourages pushing yourself to be yourself.
To those young readers who may be stuck, just because you are in the closet doesn't necessarily mean you have to hide all of who you are. As Trey Drama, a Mississippi-born actor, comedian, and director, remarked, “Know the situation. It’s like a team wearing jerseys on the field. You wanna play the game, you gotta wear the appropriate jersey. But, there are always ways to add your own flair to anything.”
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This can be evidenced by women like Darrah Herman, Kaia Rhodes, and Nahtalie Faulk, quoted above. Darrah is the nonbinary owner and operator of The Green Wave, a green consulting firm who has worked for solar energy firms in the past. She proclaimed, “In this day and age, networking with queer professionals is doable; 7225VH_AD_Verticle_Emphasis_3.375x4.625_R01.indd 3:37 PM O U T F R O1N T M A G A Z I N E . C O1/27/20 M // 9
We’re All Storytellers Here
Transmasculine Memoirs & Pandemic Reading Lists by Kate Dooley
I
t’s June, and the world continues to bravely soldier on in the fight against COVID-19. Maybe, in that time since the initial lockdown, you have committed to completing that book-list that you made, got a digital library card, or even joined a Zoom book club. The options are endless, and bookworms around the globe are uniting. Whether you spend the day watching Tiger King or making your way through the latest summer novel, we can cross another day off the calendar. And since the country went into lockdown in March, we’re all spending more time browsing Netflix titles or burying our faces in a new book. There’s no better time to pay attention to what we’re all indulging in. The movies we watch, the news that we tune into, and the books we read remind us that the words we consume can hold a special power over us. Sure, binging an entire series or speeding through a novel can take our mind off current events for a little while, but this isn’t simply a distraction; it’s self-preservation. Immersing ourselves within a new story doesn’t always mean we want to escape. By turning
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to new series and new books, we get to make connections across the queer community, all from the comfort of our couches. At the heart of this pandemic, people share their experiences, whether that be through media posts, articles, or new docuseries. While this was true of social media pre-COVID, our news feeds have drastically changed. The number of extravagant vacation photos has significantly decreased. Yes, we’re all still pining for the chance to visit somewhere (anywhere) that is beautiful, filled with delicious food, and virus-free. But, in our new, COVID world, there are more book clubs, less adventurous photo sharing; more movie recommendations, less “look at this amazing time I’m having!” Facebook albums. And this is changing how we interact with others—both online and off. In the months that have passed, there’s been a new commitment to language. This renaissance of words feels more engaging than the filtered photos we have grown used to. We’re not being pretentious. We’re
rediscovering how much we need art in our lives.
we are—and who we become—is tied up with our culture’s media.
For the time being, this trend appears here to say. So, as we continue to navigate through the pandemic, we can settle into our 21st-century literature of choice. We may not have Michelangelo, but we did get a finale of Drag Race, Harry Style’s “Watermelon Sugar,” AND a new Lady Gaga album—which all come pretty close.
And the chapters within this book make the case that queer representation can be found in a constellation of places, with two chapters being devoted to discussing Captain Kirk from Star Trek and Duckie from Pretty in Pink as beautiful lesbians, sentiments explained with both touching sincerity and wit. Next up on my quarantine binge list: all of John Hughes’s movies.
If you’re looking for something new to read after going through your trusted paperbacks and our latest pick of books to get you through quarantine, then look no further.
The book is a jumble of genres including the author’s memoir, cultural odes, and proclamation of faith. The pages detail his journey through childhood memories, hormone therapy, top surgery, and his reasons for transitioning, which include: “Want to upset good-looking ex. Want to replace good-looking ex. Bored of existing wardrobe, looking for excuse to buy all-new clothes that don’t fit in a new way.”
Hot off the press is Daniel Mallory Ortberg’s latest book, Something That May Shock and Discredit You. Published in February, Ortberg’s work carefully weaves together pop culture, niche references, and the complexities of gender transition. In doing so, he captures the reality that we’re living in an age when who
Resonating with the culture right now, this book is deeply aware of how the
media affects our lives and our bodies, and Ortberg makes the reader feel at home through references they are bound to have encountered before, possibly in a high school English class or in an early-aughts film (see chapter titled: “On Wednesday We Mean Girls Wore Pink”). The writing does not shy away from combining classic literature with our culture’s guilty pleasures. By doing so, Ortberg reminds us that engaging in stories—spoken or written—is incredibly humbling. This is why storytelling matters. Speakers get to share their words; whether they be intimate secrets or tales of fictional lands, listeners have the chance to gain insight into lives that may be completely different from their own, and, hopefully, we all learn something along the way. So, as we continue to preserve the books and films that have changed us over the year, let’s also extend support to the queer writers who are providing us with ongoing representation in our new COVID-world.
O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 1
by Addison Herron-Wheeler Photo by Drew Botcerby
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Paisley Fields Putting the Fringe
nd Frills in Country Music I
n a world where Lil Nas X is topping charts as a black, gay country icon and Orville Peck is sweeping the underground as a queer, country icon, it isn’t surprising that queer, country artists like Paisley Fields are finally getting their due. Of course, the phenomenon is nothing new in Colorado, home of Charlie’s and the Gay Rodeo, but I digress.
Paisley Fields is an artist who wears his identity on his sleeve, literally. He’s not afraid to wear frills and fringe and be himself on stage, and his music carries the same fierce, carefree energy, already landing him a lot of attention in indie circles. We were lucky enough to chat with up-and-coming artist Paisley Fields about music projects, his time laying low during COVID-19, and his plans for the future.
How did you first get into performing and playing country music? I grew up in the Midwest, and my first job in music was at church as a piano player. I've really been playing music ever since, and I played in some piano bars here in New York. I lived in Japan for a little bit; I had a tour there when I was living there and recorded an album. Music is what I’ve wanted to do my whole life. As far as country music, my first introduction to that was at this place called the Electric Park Ballroom, which is the name of our new album. That's a place where I would go in Iowa when I was a kid with my family; we would go line dancing there, and that was my first introduction to country music.
How did country music and getting into music go hand-in-hand with your coming out journey? I definitely think there’s a place for me in country music, but it took me a while to find it. I think I realized it when I was in Japan, like, it doesn’t matter what other people think. If this is music that I like, I can make a place for myself in it regardless of if they want me or not.
And now there’s definitely a big movement of openly queer country singers, both mainstream and underground. Do you feel like finally, in
2020, the world is ready for queer country music? Even a few years ago, when I played in Nashville, the bartender there was like, ‘This is great; keep doing what you’re doing, but Nashville is just not ready yet.’ That was maybe, like, five years ago, and I feel like now that’s starting to change. I spent some time in Nashville this past year, and I’ve noticed a shift there. I think it’s time.
How have you been impacted by COVID-19? Has it messed up any of your touring plans or anything else you had going on? It was crazy; we were supposed to fly to South by Southwest this year, and obviously that ended up getting canceled. I had just flown back from Italy, and then was scheduled to fly down to Nashville, and as I got there, South by Southwest was canceled. We were deciding what to do, since we had a whole tour scheduled around that. We decided to do the first few dates, and those got canceled too, so we ended up just canceling, and a three-week tour turned into a three-day tour. Then, I got back to New York and started thinking of ways to get things going, because we have this album coming out, and I can’t just sit on my hands, so I started doing some live streams. Now I’m in the middle of doing a virtual tour, a virtual takeover of my favorite venues on their Instagram and Facebook pages, and doing a livestream there.
That’s nuts, but I’m glad you still have stuff going on. What are some of your more longterm plans? I’m still writing, but I’m in a really weird space right now because I feel like I can’t plan anything with the world changing every day, so I’m kind of adjusting and trying to come up with some future stuff that won’t be affected.
COVID notwithstanding, what do you think country music is going to look like in 10 years? Apart from just queer country, I really want to see the genre be more welcoming and diverse in genral. That may be kind of wishful thinking, but it’s what I’d like to see. To hear for yourself, visit thepaisleyfields.com. O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 3
S
ince actor J. August Richards began his Hollywood career in the late 80s, he portrayed several significant roles, including vampire hunter Charles Gunn in Angel and super cyborg Mike Peterson in Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., but it’s his recent role as Dr. Oliver Post in NBC’s new hit drama Council of Dads that challenged him to take one of the biggest leaps in his life. At age 46, Richards revealed in April that he is gay during an Instagram Live video with co-star Sarah Wayne Callies.
J. AUGUST RICHARDS
BLACK, GAY AND VISIBLE
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Richards says he got into acting to combat oppression, and Council of Dads required him to show up fully as his authentic self. He knew that he could not honestly portray Post, a married, black, gay man and father, without letting everyone know that he is a gay man himself. There were other factors that led to this decision, but Richards knew how important it is to see a role model like Post on television. Since coming out, Richards received love, support, and encouragement. OUT FRONT caught up with Richards to talk more about Council of Dads, why we should check it out, and what more he would like to accomplish with his platform as an openly gay, black actor.
Hi, J! Thank you so much for taking the time to chat with me about your new NBC show, Council of Dads. Can you tell us more about it? Council of Dads is about a man who gets diagnosed with a terminal form of cancer, and in the event of his death, he asks three men to stand in for him as surrogate fathers. So, he chooses his childhood best friend, the man he sponsors in Alcoholics Anonymous, and me, his oncologist. At the end of the pilot, he does die, and we end up becoming his stand-in fathers.
Can you tell us more about your character, Dr. Oliver Post? What is he all about?
Photo by Benjo Arwas
Oliver is Scott’s oncologist, as well as his wife’s best friend from medical school. He had a troubled family life as a child, and it was always his dream to be a father, but he never thought it was possible because he is a gay man, and he was not accepted by his family. So, over the course of his life, he builds a family. He meets his husband; they have been together for 15 years; they got married before it was legal; he is best friends with this girl named Robin and her kids.
He found this family, and so for him, when he is asked to be on the council of dads, he knows what he missed from his father. What he wants to provide for the children in his life, he wants to build a fence around them and create a space where they can naturally thrive as themselves because he loves them. So, that is who Oliver is. He is a protector, and he wants to give you the freedom to be you, whoever that is.
We are only a couple episodes in; how has Council of Dads been received by audiences so far? So far, so good! I have never seen such 100 percent approval rating from people who watched the entire first episode. I have never stood in front of so many people crying before, either. Everyone was telling me about how much the first episode, and the second episode as well, made them cry. So, the reception has been great. I am just happy that people are moved by it.
Why did you want to be involved with Council of Dads? Firstly, I loved the character, and I loved the script. I think that my work as an actor is all about a dialogue, about the humanity of black men, and I felt like this role furthers that conversation. The humanity and the perception of black men in American and in the world. That is what all my work is about as an actor, and this felt like a very natural progression to that conversation. Also, the message is really tied into one that is very personal and important to me, which is about equality—not just diversity, but equality. Everyone on this show sits at the table equally. There’s not just one of this, and one of that;There is multiple of each, and that’s empowering. So, that is why I wanted to be a part of this show.
And what have you learned from this experience? Wow, that’s a really big question because I have learned so much. Prior to getting
this job, I wrote down what I wanted from my next job. I wrote down that I wanted a character that I could sink my teeth into that felt like a hand in a glove but was also a challenge in a fun way. I wanted to be around people who inspire me as a human being and as an artist, and I did not want to be on a procedural. This show presented all of those things. To describe all of the things that I learned, it would be a book [laughs].
Your acting career began when you were spotted by a casting director. Has this always been your passion? Always. I wasn’t so much spotted by a casting director as I crashed his office in the city of New York when I was a kid in Maryland. I crashed, I mean I disrupted the life of the casting director of The Cosby Show when I was 14 or 15, and I haven’t looked back since. Ever since I was sat in front of the television, I tried to crawl directly in it. I was just so clear about who I was and what I wanted to do with my life. So, yes, I have always known that I wanted to be an actor.
Many people know you as Charles Gunn in Angel and Michael Peterson/Deathlok in Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. What is your dream role? I always say the next one is my dream role because it’s my job to make sure that every character that I get is a dream role. I have to figure out why it’s my dream role, and that’s the work that I do.
You recently decided to open about your sexuality. Why did you feel like this was the right time to let the world know that you are gay? This was sort of the last step of my coming out process. Everyone in my life who needed to know knew, and I moved through the world doing exactly what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it, but there was a layer, a wall that I have always had between my career and my personal life. I don’t think I’m telling anybody new information by saying that. People have a tendency to limit what you can do as a gay person in this world, more deeply as a gay actor, and they also have a tendency to limit what you can do as a black actor. So, at a young age,
I was ill-equipped and ill-prepared to move through this town both black and gay. I’m 46 years old now, and I can do it. I finally have the confidence and the knowledge to be able to do it. If I would have done it a day before I did, it would have been the wrong time.
What more do you hope to accomplish with your platform as an openly gay, black actor? Honestly, I just hope to thrive. I just want other gay men out there, other black, gay men, other actors, other people, just to be inspired by the fact that one can be openly gay and still survive. That is all I really want. I also want to open the dialogue in communities about allowing people to be themselves and not stereotyping or limiting the possibilities in the world. More importantly, by coming out publicly, my true mission was revealed to me, which is, I want equality for all. I am talking about groups that I belong to and groups that I don’t. That is really what I come here to do. That is my mission, and I feel like every time someone liberates themselves, you give other people permission to liberate themselves as well. I hope to make this world a little bit more of an equal place for everyone.
What’s next for you? Any other upcoming projects we should be on the lookout for? Man, I am just trying to wait out this quarantine [laughs]. I literally have no plans because I can’t plan anything. We’re just all doing a part, and bringing it back to the show for second, I really think that’s the theme of Council of Dads. It’s like, how do you show up for one another in a time of crisis, but also, how do you show up in the mundane moments as well? I think as a planet, we are all being asked to show up for one another. Whether that means stay at home, or being a frontline healthcare worker or grocery store attendant or police officer, whatever your position is, we are all showing up for each other, and that is ultimately what our show is about. O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 5
YOU’VE HEARD OF
Lip Sync for Your Life? TRY HOWLING FOR YOUR HEALTH
by Addison Herron-Wheeler Photos of howlers by Amanda Schwengel
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O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 7
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ou may have heard it on a bad day, sitting inside on your couch, just wishing you could see a friendly face. You may have seen news posts or Facebook posts about it or heard you friends talking. And you may have been walking down the street at 8 p.m., only to be greeted by the sounds of howls from all around. No, wolves haven’t taken over the slowly reopening, abandoned city streets. Folks across the city, and now across the world, are joining together vocally at 8 p.m. every night, to howl. The phenomenon reached heights of global popularity, but it started right here in Denver. The howling movement was started by local poet and literary journal editor Brice Maiurro and his partner, Shelsea Ochoa, who works at the Denver Museum of Nature & Science. At first, it just started as a release and a way to connect with neighbors. Then, the Facebook group the two created began to grow, and it was clear that this was bigger than Maiurro and Ochoa, bigger than Denver, and bigger even than the virus. People were looking for a reason to howl, whether it was to stay sane, honor frontline workers, or connect with neighbors. “We were talking about how in hippie towns, there are weird traditions like going outside and howling to show connection,” said Maiurro. “And so, we decided to start a group and get some friends involved, and then it grew really rapidly the next thing we knew. The two never paid for advertising to grow the now-explosive Facebook group, and there was no grand plan to
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become a huge movement that joined people together. The idea was basically to connect, to do something that felt like a primal release, and what else was everyone doing? “It’s a public group, so that means we have all kinds of people,” Ochoa explained. “I think because howling is such a universal thing, it kind of predates cultures. There's not one cultural group or one group of people that really identifies with it. I think all kinds of different people ended up doing it, which is cool.” However, because of all these differing opinions, Maiurro and Ochoa found themselves in the position of moderating and trying to advocate for queer and marginalized folks on the forum. They have since closed commenting, but for a while, they were all working around the clock to balance what was said and done in the group. “Thankfully, we have an amazing team of moderators,” Maiurro explained. “We've got about 25 moderators that are on the page hours every night. They talk to the press, and they approve posts.
They also kick people out of the group when necessary. It's ended up being a big learning curve, because I think when we started a group called 'Go Outside and Howl at 8 p.m.,' that the name itself would be self-explanatory, but then you get a lot of different people, and you have to start making a rule. Like, we decided, no political content, but then you have to decide what is political. It's a lot more involved than I thought to run a group like this.” “I never really knew how much of a bubble that I lived in before this page because at the beginning, I would approve posts and not even think about it,” Ochoa explained. “And now, I really
see how much bigotry is still alive and well on the internet. So, if somebody wants to post something, for example, about being bisexual, we just make sure that we're watching that so that no one is posting anything hateful." However, outside the world of Facebook, the howling has reached people in a way that can’t be tainted by internet politics. Folks in all 50 states in the U.S. and more than 100 countries are now howling for healthcare workers on the frontline, for their sanity, to feel a sense of unity, for those who have died, and for any number of things that need to be either celebrated or lamented. “I've also seen a lot of the community rallied together in support of each other,” Ochoa said. “I think a lot of people, including myself, have felt very lonely during this time, and sometimes, people will make a post about having a hard day, and they get all of the support. That's been really beautiful to me.
When asked why the two think howling caught on over some other expression of unity, Maiurro added, “I think there's something wild to it. There's something Western to it. I think that people have the chance to not hold back; it's very direct and visceral. And that's why animals howl, to stay connected over long distances and communicate. But, like many other things during quarantine, the thoughts remain: will this go away when things go back do some sense of “normal”? Will we lose the will to howl once we’re back in the clubs, at the bars, or in shared public spaces? Maiurro and Ochoa don’t think so. “I would say beyond a reasonable doubt that Chelsea and I will always howl,” Maiurro explained. So, next time you hear the howls start at 8 p.m., set down what you’re doing, lean out the window, and give it a try. You’ll be glad you did.
O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 1 9
by Denny Patterson Photo by Lauren Dukoff
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or the past three decades, LGBTQ and music icon Melissa Etheridge has entertained the masses with her confessonal-style lyrics and raspy, smoky tone. Before COVID-19 caused a global shutdown, Etheridge was gearing up to travel for her new tour, The Medicine Show. Unfortunately, quarantine orders put a damper on the concert and festival circuit, but she vowed to keep the music playing. Etheridge has performed for her fans every day on Facebook Live. I mean, what’s better than a free performance from this legendary artist in the comfort of your own home? 2 0 \\ J U N E 3 , 2 0 2 0
This pandemic is causing emotional trauma for millions of people, and Etheridge can relate. No stranger to personal battles, she beat breast cancer, weathered the AIDS crisis, and recently lost her son Beckett from an opioid overdose. No matter how dark or bleak the situation, Etheridge knew she had to overcome it. Her survival makes her an inspiration of resilience and hope, and she wants you to know that whatever you are going through, you are not alone. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, and you will get through the pain and suffering. OUT FRONT caught up with Etheridge about connecting with people during this global crisis, what we can expect once she goes back on tour, and starting her cannabis business, Etheridge Farms.
Hi, Melissa! Thank you so much for taking the time to chat with me. I would like to begin by talking more about your upcoming Medicine Show tour. The tour is currently postponed due to COVID-19, but once it is back on schedule, what can audiences expect? You can expect someone who will be so grateful to perform [laughs]. I can’t wait to get back on stage for the first time. It’s one of the reasons why I am doing this Facebook Live every day, coming on to sing a couple songs because it’s my life. Since I was 13 years old, I have been singing every week for people, you know? It’s just what I do, and it’s just as much medicine for me. So, The Medicine Show, I imagine it’s going to be infused with a little bit more spirit this time. Don’t worry, I will always do my hit songs like “Come to My Window” and “I’m the Only One.” I love playing the hit songs and hearing people sing them.
Yes, I was going to ask if those songs would make an appearance. Oh, definitely! All the hit songs. I know that some people only come see me once in their life, and they want to hear their favorite songs, and I know that the popular songs are their favorite, so I have no problem singing those at every single concert. Then I will do a couple new songs from The Medicine Show and some deep cuts for the people that come to see me many, many times.
That’s awesome. How have the Facebook Live sing-a-longs been going? I am sure fans are very appreciative of it. Very much so. The gratitude just feels so good. It gives me something to do every day. You know, we are staying at home and doing what they say, so it gives us something to do, and it’s fun. It’s all you want to do when the world turns sideways. You want to help, and this is what I can do.
How will The Medicine Show tour differ from your previous tour? What makes it so unique? The collection of songs and I just keep getting better and better. If you see my show, you will know that every, single show is different. Even though we play the hits and everything, I am very much in the moment. I don’t say the same thing every time. I am very live with whatever the audience is. If the audience is sort of a Monday night, sit-down crowd, then I will switch my show to that. If it’s a stand up, serving drinks crowd, we’re going to rock the whole time. Each show is different.
You have toured and traveled all over the world, but each experience is a new adventure for you. What are you looking forward to the most about this tour? Just doing it. Getting back on it will be my favorite part. Getting onstage and providing some relief and getting back on track of what we love to do. I will be so grateful to play music.
The actual Medicine Show album was released last year. How has it been received? Oh, bless my fans. I am so grateful for them. It was received greatly; people like it a lot. They really like the sound of it and what I was writing about. They enjoyed the intensity, the range of dynamics through it all. They request the songs, and that always makes me happy.
What is the creative process like for you? Take us into the mind of Melissa Etheridge. Well, this one was a little different. I sort of created the musical bits first for a lot of these songs, and then I wrote lyrics to them. Usually, it’s kind of the other way around. Some of the songs I wrote at the same time, but it was a little different. I had done some extensive song demos before I
went to John Shanks and said, “OK, let’s cut these,” and then recorded them.
You are known to reflect and address current events in your work. Has that always been important to you? Yes. Current events affect me personally, and I write from my personal experience. Even though my music has been extremely emotional, you know, I have a history of the heartbreak songs, that sort of approach, I grow, and I grow out of that. I have been in a delightful relationship for 10 years now, so I’m not going to write heartbreak songs because that’s not really where I’m at. Yet, I have my own, and we all go through emotional issues. I can always look inside and write truthfully. Being a mother, being someone in their 50s that is looking at the world and that’s going to affect me personally. So, I am going to write about it.
The Medicine Show also advocates for plant-based medicine. Why would you like to see the legalization of cannabis, and do you think the United States will make this a reality anytime soon? Yes. For many reasons. One, I went through breast cancer 15 years ago, and I used cannabis to help with the pain, to help the depression, to help with my appetite, and to help with sleep. And when I was going through it, I just had the biggest understanding that this is medicine. It has been maligned and outlawed, and it is truly medicine. It’s medicine that I just feel that everyone should have access to. At least a choice. It’s not for everyone. Not everyone is going to understand it and get past the fear of it, but for those who can, it is such good medicine. Yes, I do think that as states open up to the medicinal side of it and see the benefit and see the lowering of opioid use and opioid deaths, they will see that correlation right there and how good it is. When you have someone in your family who is suffering from some disease or other, you see and know that it helps. It’s going to grow, and the more it grows, the more research we can do. It needs to be legalized. It’s a journey to it, yet we have countries like Canada who have federalized it and legalized it, and we can see how good it is there. O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 1
years how it has grown into a business, I really wanted to be a face of it. I wanted to help people who were looking for it as medicine. There are enough places open, and there’s enough brands that focus on, ‘Woohoo, a good time!’ That is fine; I have no problem with that. I would really like to help the middle-aged woman who needs help with sleep or needs help with menopause or cramps or any of these things that it helps with. To really give them a brand, a guide on how to navigate through the cannabis world.
And you are in the beginning stage of Etheridge Farms? Yes, it is just beginning. Everything we are going through right now sort of gave
Was cannabis a big part of your life before being diagnosed with breast cancer? No, it wasn’t. It was social. Maybe on the weekend now or then with someone. I was familiar with it, but I did not use it every day for medicine like I do now.
You even decided to jump into the cannabis business by starting Etheridge Farms. Why did you decide to make that leap? I decided 15 years ago when I was going through this. I felt so strongly about providing cannabis for medicine, and I just really wanted to become an advocate for it. As I have watched over the last 10 2 2 \\ J U N E 3 , 2 0 2 0
us a hit. We were all set to roll out in September, but we might have to back it off a little bit. I’m in no hurry. We are around, and everything is changing. I’m fine with whatever it has to be.
What can people expect in terms of your products? You can expect quality. You can expect when we say organic, that this is absolutely the most organic, pesticidefree, chemical-free product. What we say it is, it’s going to be. You can expect guidance; you can expect precision; you
can expect to be educated, and you can expect that I will always be guiding you through this. I’m not looking to make a billion dollars on this. I am looking to create a legacy brand that is there to help people through it, not to make the biggest buck I can.
Does Etheridge Farms have a website or social media? We were about to put all that up this summer, so hopefully look forward to summer. It took us this long to get our licenses. When everything went legal in California in 2017, everyone had to reapply for licenses. Just last year, we finally got the first manufacturing license in Santa Cruz County.
The regulations are unbelievably difficult. If you don’t have, we call them our Canadian overlords, their money coming in, which they bought up just so much in California, they can easily make things difficult because they have millions and millions and millions of dollars. We decided not to go that way because we didn’t want to become this big factory farming of cannabis. We wanted it to be quality stuff, so we have been taking the long road, and we can see the end of the road as we get over this little hump.
Are you still partnered with that one California dispensary to make cannabis infused wine? No. When they passed Prop 64, they made it illegal to put cannabis in alcohol. So, we stopped that, but hopefully in the future, we can start that up again.
What do you make of people who believe cannabis is just a gateway drug to harsher drugs like cocaine, meth, heroin, etc.? I would say, I understand you have been taught that over the last few decades. That is what has been
hammered into us. I would say, look at the new research. Because it was a Schedule One drug, we were not allowed to do research, and then people would say, ‘Well, there’s no research,’ but it’s like, well, you don’t allow us to research. So, finally, people have gotten brave and gone around it, and there’s research in Israel and Canada, and you can see countries like Canada who have legalized it, and the drug use hasn’t gone up. It has actually gone down, especially opioid use. So, I would just say, look at the facts now. That’s an old belief, and it’s time to change those.
Outside of The Medicine Show and Etheridge Farms, you also headline a cruise. Although you won’t be able to set sail again until November 2021, can you tell us more about it? It sounds fabulous! Yes! It will be the fourth cruise, and man, it has become one of my favorite things that I do. Believe me, before I did my first cruise, I was like, ‘No way. I’m not going to do a cruise; that’s crazy.’ I learned to enjoy it very, very much.
We go to beautiful places like Key West and Jamaica and enjoy the wonderful Caribbean. The boat is filled with really, really delightful music, and it is just extraordinary. There are a lot of women, but everyone is invited. There is nothing like being around a lot of women, and believe me, we get a lot of things done and keep the boat nice and clean. We don’t have a lot of children onboard because the cruise is during the school year, and it’s not really geared toward children, but there are things for them to do.
I hear you are working on a new album as well. When can we expect that to come out? I was going to say at the end of the year, but it’s probably going to be pushed back toward the beginning of next year.
Are there any other projects we should be on the lookout for? Well, that’s enough! [Laughs] I’m busy with all that. For more news, tour dates and announcements, visit melissaetheridge. com or follow her on social media.”
O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 3
Introducing:
The Future of Cannabis
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ome of your summer plans may be canceled, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t practice relaxation and recreation at home. There are a ton of fun, new ways to try cannabis this summer; these are just a few ideas to keep the 420 vibes going all summer long.
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RIPPLE QUICKSTICKS Ripple are known for their delicious, easy-to-take, dissolvable powders. Previously, it could be added to water or tea, infusing beverages with perfectly dosed CBD and THC; now, they’re going a step further. You can still put QuickSticks in your drinks, but they also dissolve straight on your tongue like a pixie stick, cutting out the middleman. They are tasty and accessible, and as always, the dosing seems perfect. Most sticks are 10 mg of THC, so one is a great starter dose, or half for those looking to ease into their high. Available in Colorado.
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STRATOS DABTABS Dabbing is one of the most effective ways to consume cannabis, but also one of the trickiest. It involves breakable equipment and access to some serious flame power if you don’t have an electric nail, and it can be pricey and messy. Stratos’ DabTabs aims to offer an alternative for those who would like to dab a different way. Simply drop one of the DabTabs into your rig to take a hit instead of messing with concentrate, or grab one of their pens and drop in a tab. The tabs are also clearly labeled either Relax, Energy, and Sleep. The pros? It’s definitely an easy, accessible way to vape or dab that removes gatekeeping and makes things easy. Cons? It definitely feels like dabbing 101. For those who savor the scents and tastes of concentrates or know about strains and categories beyond the simple breakdown Stratos gives, it feels like you’re losing a bit. Still, this is a simple, fun way to take a dab, and there’s no reason not to give it a try this summer. Available in Colorado.
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MOKSHA CBD CHOCOLATES
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If you have a sweet tooth but prefer CBD with no traces of psychoactive THC, you’re in luck. Moksha makes chocolate, CBD treats that are hemp-derived and legal across the U.S, with 20 mg of CBD each. They come in amazing flavors like matcha, white raspberry coconut, and dark chocolate, and if you’re craving pain relief, sleep help, or relaxation, they will certainly do the trick. They will also take the edge off after a long day, but have no fear, no intoxicating effects here. Available at mokshachocolate.com.
O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 5
American Queer Life Singing the OVID
ootie Blues by Rick Kitzman
W
hen a quart of Purell sells for more than a barrel of oil, when stores run out of sympathy cards, you know you’re living in a hellish, upside-down world. Suddenly, because of the novel coronavirus, we’ve got a lot of time on our hands. Which I worry about: my filthy, disgusting, deadly hands. I touch 37,000 things in my home, all potentially crawling with COVID cooties. The virus seems to live on anything but molten lava. Supposedly, once you pump antibacterial goo on your paws—and this is where dog cones could come in handy—you’re free to rub your itchy eyes, pick your nose, and lick your fingers. Which according to scientists, we do about 37 times a minute, an easy way to infect yourself. But that dispenser I’ve gripped with my filthy, disgusting, deadly 2 6 \\ J U N E 3 , 2 0 2 0
hands? I swear it glows like a Chernobyl children’s playground.
attack. I counted 3,700! We’re driving a hearse to our own funeral.
I worry about driving my car, Shavonda Honda. Returning from the grocery store, I ticked off tactile actions and had a panic
First, you touch your keys or key fob. Keys are the ninja star of COVID-cootie death. Then you pull, press, turn, or shift gobs of
knobs, buttons, switches, or handles, all before you leave the garage. Your phone, water bottle? Lethal threats. God forbid you have to get gas; that’s a plethora of contagious touches, about 37. If you pay with filthy, COVID-cootie-infested cash, you might as well lick a Franklin. But gas is cheap. I’ve eliminated touching the turn signal, the gear shift twice, and mirrors. I don’t signal my turns, and I don’t back up. I wait for the car in front of me to leave so I can drive forward. I don’t adjust mirrors so I can see some idiot driving up my ass. Don’t they know I might be turning? Unavoidable, indirect contact? The microscopic critters swarm on your car seats like fleas on a cat's coat. And like fleas, they can jump (I read that on the internet). Your clothes are now a shroud of pestilence. Strip, and burn them. So, that’s like 370 contacts with lethal COVID cooties. Boom, gone! You’re welcome. Just serving my community. To recap: CAR = DEATH TRAP. Because of this equation, I had my partner Neil’s bike tuned up. He suggested attaching the neighbor kid’s training wheels. Though I haven’t ridden a bike in about 37 years, I hear it’s like riding a bike: Comes right back to ya. I’d drench Shavonda in vinegar, bleach, alcohol, hydrogen peroxide, and Drano, but I’d probably set off a lethal gas cloud poisoning a 10-block area. I still have to drive to buy food. I worry about Bucky, the grocery store clerk. Is he a hero or an autocrat in training? I worry about going the wrong direction down grocery aisles, so I back up. I know, sneaky. That’s when I met Bucky. He was not amused. Craving Vitamin C, I worry my cute Cuties are covered in COVID-cooties (say that 10 times). I’ve been snarfing the orange orbs because, well, one word: scurvy.
I worry about rubber gloves—mittens of false hope, I call them—where nature is throwing a Mardi Gras of disease. You touch an infected pen, put it in your mouth, pffft! You’re a goner. I worry about loose masks easily permeated by those crafty, COVID cooties. A friend told me his hair stylist used booby tape ( breast adhesive) to adhere the gaps to his face. I could also use it to tape down the toilet seat covers. Win-win. Paper towel and rubber band masks? That really makes me worry about sneezing, other people’s sneezing. Known as respiratory aerosols, the slippery driblets, propelled at 100 mph, can travel 200 feet and splurt 100,000 germs into the air. Sneezing is like shooting snot bullets of death out of a cannon. Almost forgot. Seat belt strap and buckle? Leave them be. Yes, it’s unsafe, but I’d rather die in a car crash than drown in my own phlegm. Speaking of phlegm—and we all do these days—I worry about not having a ventilator because there’s no guarantee one will be available if I need it. Vinnie’s Ventilators sells cheap, refurbished models (I found him on the internet). It’s an option. I worry about having to go to a hospital. That would be like attending a COVID cootie convention. Then I worry about nurses, doctors, EMTs, cleaners, technicians, and everyone from all walks of life. I worry about America, about who’s in charge. Jared Kushner? Pleeeeeze. Someone tell him the federal stockpile is not “our stockpile,” i.e., for Ivanka and the Russians, but for U.S. citizens. And those charts tracking COVID-cootie progression? With him at the helm, pray the v-shape doesn’t turn into a gigantic check mark.
Two words: toilet paper. Seriously? Before the COVID-cooties invaded, did Americans not wipe their asses? And I’m thinking of getting those horseshoeshaped, tissue paper covers for the toilet seat. Since they slide off, I’ll keep tape nearby.
This is my second plague. Been there, done that, doing it again. And again, I have to worry about American civility and integrity and Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases. He did an amazing job during the AIDS pandemic, botched by a past, immoral Republican idiot president, Reagan (and we know how that turned out.)
I worry about baking chocolate shortages—we all have our priorities.
Dr. Fauci is repeating his avuncular role as the calm voice of facts and science with
our current, immoral, Republican, idiot president, and has been embarrassingly treated with contempt and disrespect. Our Whiner-in-Chief would probably like to replace him with Dr. Vlad Zelenko, quack prescriber of the hydroxychloroquine “cure,” a deadly and disproven “cure” allegedly being taken by the idiot president. One can only hope, but I don’t believe it. He’s just trying to boost the stock of one of his toadies because nothing exudes trust like the name Vlad and a White House endorsement. Would you trust Dracula and Eye-gore? Believing Saint Fauci or Putin’s b*tch expresses the divisive state of America in a nutshell. I worry about conspiracy theories. Especially the deep-deeper-deepest state conspiracy theory to promote conspiracy theories. Written in the Cyrillic alphabet, no doubt. I worry about American anti-vaxers and religious zealots. They besmirch the constitution, waving it high for selfish rights, trampling on everyone else’s. Vigilantes storm capitals like they did the Michigan legislature bearing AK-47s. I’d have called out the National Guard. Or passed out Make America Sick Again hats. As we enter Phase 4 of the pandemic— F*ck' you, I’m doing what I want to do because my president says I can’—I’m having my partner make me a head-to-toe burka. I figure Muslim women wear the most effective personal protection. I worry about naps. Often I curl up in a ball on the couch, but since COVID-cooties lurk everywhere—EVERYWHERE!—I potentially could be fretting in my own coffin. I worry about kids and old people and our environment. I worry about the postCOVID world and never hugging anyone again or seeing their smiles. I worry about the upcoming election. I worry about the whole goddamn universe! Sigh … I think I need to drink 37 bottles of CBD oil and pour scotch on my Cheerios. Anyway, I hope this has been helpful. If you happen to be passing by someone wearing a burka in a bike accident, it’s probably me from singing the COVIDcootie blues and not paying attention. Don’t let an ambulance take me to the hospital, and don’t touch me... O U T F R O N T M A G A Z I N E . C O M // 2 7
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HEINZESIGHT TALK IS CHEAP
by Brent Heinze
M
ost of us have heard the phrases "talk is cheap" and "actions speak louder than words" throughout our lives. These statements are more than just a series of words; they express one of the most fundamentally important ideas to support our personal lives flourishing and make positive impacts in the world around us. These phrases stress the significance of not only working to develop a good plan to accomplish a task, but the importance of putting the effort into executing that plan to gain something. To cause any change, improve situations, or push someone toward greatness, action needs to happen. It is more than simply wanting something to be different. It takes the energy, drive, focus, and initiative to cause the change we desire. Think about how often we hear about a fantastic idea, interesting plan, innovative thought, or something that sounds like a lot of fun, but then nothing comes from it. Many times, these fantastic possibilities simply become abandoned in a sea of things that could have been but never develop. Of course, not every fleeting thought needs to be put into existence, but it is important to make the effort to evaluate if something is worth the energy it might take to make it happen or if your aspiration to make something happen is worth the effort it will take. Accomplishments are hard enough to gain, even when tons of work is poured into them. Without strong intentions and a solid plan, accomplishments are probably not going to happen. Half-assed attempts generally fail. The same ideology goes for social exchanges. People need to make the effort to get together, not just talk about it. It’s easy to say that we need to hang out with others or make efforts to do something, but it is completely different
It honestly comes down to the personal integrity you convey to the rest of the world by what you speak.What we say is more than simply a collection of words to get out an idea.It speaks to your own determination to follow through with your intentions. Some are amazing speakers, but without the follow-through to bring something to completion, it is just useless propaganda that does nothing but give false hope of something.
to develop plans and follow through with showing up. Our time is relatively short on this planet, and who knows how long any of us have? There are times when we have either lost contact with someone or they die, and we kick ourselves for not making more of an effort to spend quality moments with them. It is vital to our meaningful relationships to create opportunities to show love and support to each other by interacting. Although actions truly are more important than words, it is crucial to remember the value of words; they allow us to illustrate ideas we develop so we can define and articulate them to ourselves and others. Words give us the opportunity to formulate a plan, but it is critical to choose your words carefully and accurately. Certain things sound really good as they come out of our mouths, but the meaning or intention behind them may be more empty than we want to admit. It is important that the statements that we speak are honest, thoughtful, and show our intention to follow through with our actions. We should say what we mean and mean what we say.
We may speak of a plan because it sounds good with little intent or ability to complete the task. It is important to put adequate time, effort, planning, and realistic expectations into what you intend to do. There are a variety of challenges and situations that can pop up unexpectedly to stop your potential to finish something or delay your success. It is important to push past these roadblocks if we want to succeed. I have one final thought regarding the importance of honest communication about your intentions: the reality is that there is only a finite amount of time and effort that can be put into a variety of situations in our lives. There is most likely not a perfect time to do anything, but it is important to carve out opportunities to accomplish those things that we want to do. There will usually need to be a compromise or sacrifice of one aspect or element for another, since most of us have an abundance of activities and responsibilities already existing in our lives that we want to pursue. Take some time, and think about what is actually meant when you promise to do something or set your intentions to accomplish a goal. Not only is your objective expressed for others to hear, but there may be others who are counting on your follow-through.
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BAR TAB | THE HOTTEST COLORADO NIGHTLIFE
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