OFM MUSIC

COMPOSING

HER OWN DESTINY Claire Heywood

by Veronica L. Holyfield

“This year was the year that I decided it was important for me to come out, and be honest and clear about the fact that I’m a queer woman,” Claire Heywood opens up in a conversation at the beginning of the new year. The singer-songwriter is preparing to release some new music, and for the record, she wants to be authentic in how she presents herself in both her personal life and in her professional realm.

Heywood could have gone to any Denver-based media company to have this conversation, but she was intentional when she reached out to OFM. As a bisexual woman, she understands the need for nuance, the craving for deliberate-yet-thoughtful questions, considerate and open-minded curiosity, and the understading that being queer isn’t all that she is. Yet, it is a lot of who she is, and she is inclined to share how she is navigating her own identity within the LGBTQ community.

“I’m a queer woman, and I’m also femme, and I’ve found that I have had the privilege of passing as hetero in a lot of different situations,” she explains. “I think, when you’re discussing queerness and bisexuality, it can be really nice to talk to folks who have an understanding of all of that, rather than kind of having to explain, like, what bisexuality is.”

We now know a bit of Heywood’s identities: a singer, a songwriter, and a bisexual woman. Let’s take a step back, though, and discover the essence, the essay, the expression that makes her the unique, strong, and brave storyteller she has become.

Heywood is a wordsmith and a natural-born entertainer, a clever curator of story with a divine passion for performative prose. Growing up, she sought the limelight and was drawn to theater, dance, and orchestra, and even stand-up comedy. Desiring a way of being seen and understood through a variety of outlets, Heywood became intrigued by music at an early age.

“I remember as a little kid getting a Discman for the first time, and the first experience of really listening to music critically, feeling the emotional journey that it can take you on,” she explains. “I, for some reason, just didn’t put together that I wanted to do that. I was just in awe of it and was a rather obsessive listener all throughout my childhood.”

After picking up a guitar at age 15, Heywood admits that she only plucked away for a little while, but didn’t take it too seriously until she was about 21. Still not convinced that music was going to be her preferred creative output, she pursued a degree in English and started writing poetry and essays. However, throughout her time in writing workshops, Heywood received frequent feedback that her writing style took on a certain lyrical elegance as she began to craft her first set of poems that took a malleable shape that was reminiscent of song. “I started writing songs about five years ago and really fell in love. When I really wanted to write songs, I was like, ‘I need to learn how to play this guitar better,’” she laughs. “So, really it was the songwriting process that welcomed that and led me into music.”

It didn’t take long for her to begin performing publicly in Denver; starting in the literary scene at places like Mutiny Information Cafe and Mercury Cafe playing in showcases alongside poets and comedians. After accumulating about an hour-long setlist, Heywood recorded her first EP in 2019 titled The Wind, It Howls, and she was welcomed into the fold of the local music scene.

“I didn’t have a bunch of money for like in-person guitar lessons or anything, and so I just learned everything on YouTube,” she reveals. While the guitar has become her main songwriting companion, and the words continue to flow and fill pages of powerful poetry, she confesses that it took some time to get comfortable performing in front of people.

“I was not totally comfortable with the guitar yet, so it was extremely nerve-wracking, but I just felt like I had to do it,” Heywood explains. Though fear did exist for Heywood, it was never a deterrent.

She says that when she was playing her original songs in front of audiences, she felt absolutely and 100 percent herself. Perfection could not be the main objective; the driving force had to solely be focused on the love of the art and the need to put it out into the world.

It’s easy to see why Heywood was accepted with open arms and quickly became a voice that many folks were drawn to. There is a timeless warmth that echoes the

classic tunes of yesteryear, a sauntering serenity that is encased in the folk-inspired, soul-infused beauty. If her sonic resonance had an aesthetic, it would be a homey mix of 70s-art-deco and modern-country sentiment. As graceful, poised, and confident Heywood is in conversation, her music offers a further vibration of eloquence that easily transports us to another plane.

I dare you not to be entranced by her effortless verses as you stream the tracks that make up her Spotify profile. One would never question Heywood’s confidence, the way she uses her magnetic, velvet-like voice with allure, yet she says it did take some time for her to come to accept her desire to be the frontwoman. Following her instincts and dismissing selfjudgment and doubt is what worked without fail for her after she realized she had landed where she had always wanted to be.

“My dreams are valid, even when it feels from the outside like they’re not, and I love my dreams. I’m not going to give up on them; it’s taken me a long time to even admit what they are,” she tells.

Feeling pride and ownership in the work that she puts out, Heywood is the epitome of an independent artist. Releasing tracks when the moment feels right, allowing the music to inform her of the next steps that need to be taken, it all coincides with her need to be out about her sexuality and be a visible, fierce femme. The time has come, and the timing is right. “I knew for myself that I was queer a long time ago. I identify as a queer, bisexual woman, and I’m femme; my first relationships were heteronormative and were with men, and they were very much validated by society. Not surprising,” she laughs. “And they were real; I loved people of different genders, and so it was easy to let my family hold an assumption. It felt like it was easier to be invisible or something, which can be true, but also, there’s, like, a major cost to not being clear.”

Heywood continues, “Queerness doesn’t look any particular way, and for me, that clarity and clearness has been incredibly rewarding. It has made my relationships stronger, and I’ve also made my vision of myself stronger.”

When it comes to songwriting, Heywood has discovered a new openness in how she expresses herself, her emotions, and her relationships in song since coming out.

“My first EP I wrote as I was processing the end of two relationships I had that were with men, and so the pronouns on that he/him, and for a while, I thought, ‘People will think I’m straight because I said ‘he’ in a song.’ So, yes, my first EP exists; it was real; I really did experience heartbreak with men. And now, I’m in a partnership with a lesbian woman, and we live together; we have been experiencing the pandemic together, and I write about her with the pronouns she/her,” Heywood explains.

As she welcomes in a new paradigm of expressing her thoughts, feelings, lovers, and emotions, 2020 was also a year of adjusting her musical direction. Parallel to the rest of humanity’s shift over the last year, her plans, too, changed from releasing a sophomore, follow-up EP was downsized into three songs with accompanying music videos. “Songwriting comes in phases,” she explains, “and the three songs that I released this year were all about finding, creating, and defining a creative space for myself.” From the energetic single “Python” that elicits movement and even howling from the crowd during live sets, to the song “Letter Day” where Heywood flexes her Americana, indie-folk muscles, and finishing with the newest release, “I won’t resign my love for that old dream,” where we are lulled to rest with the lush vibratto of Heywood’s distinct and differential aesthetic.

While life may have had other plans, Heywood remains faithful to the pursuit of soulful and courageous creativity, and she trusts herself above all else. Nestling into life with her partner has proven lucrative in more ways than one, as she appreciates the awe-inspiring moments amid grief, curiosities, and wonderment. To be clear, this fiercely queer femme is blooming in the landscape of traverse imagination and has found a safe place for her art and passion to flourish.

OFM NEW MUSIC

This month’s must-catch new releases from the artists you already love or the musicians you need to know.

Rob Zombie

The Lunar Injection Kool Aid Ecliplse Conspiracy The brilliant creative has taken his time, with five years passing since the release of his last album, and the wait was worth it. Delivering a heavy dose of hardcore rock and high-energy ragers, cocoon yourself in the darkness and lose yourself in a world constructed by the iconic Zombie. Pay special attention to banger “The Eternal Struggles of the Howling Man” and the intricately executed “What You Gonna Do with That Gun Mama.”

Releases March 12, 2021.

dodie:

Build A Problem A tale of the introvert, dodie takes some time exploring the problematic push of expectation and assumption. Musically ambitious and wondrously complex, the new record is a peek into the diary of the artist who describes the new music as an unstable exploration of figuring out who she is in music. Dreamily intimate and superbly flighty, dodie lifts with her angelic and delightful soprano while reaching deep into the depths of her insecurities with Build a Problem.

Alex Somers

Siblings + Siblings 2 The multi-disciplinary artist has ventured into a poetic doubleheader that features lush, hypnotic sonnets that resonate symphonic. With an obsession for found objects, Somers writes as though these are beautiful offerings to the weathered machines and imperfect elements. Striving to embody the detailed delivery of a life through melody, the albums have come to fruition after nearly seven years of construction, finally allowing the tracks to emerge from hiding.

Releases March 19, 2021.

Evanescence

The Bitter Truth Amy Lee reemerges after a decade with her symphonic-goth-rock outfit Evanescence, and we are here for it. The quintessential tracks have matured into ones of social protest and self-respect, while still tapping into the ethereal echoes paired with biting, cynical lyricism that we know and love. Dramatic, vibrant, piercing, theatrical, ghostly, and orchestral rock: all the the things we want from the massive and operatic powerhouse that is Evanescence.

Release March 26, 2021.

Valeree

It’s Fine, I’m Fine The retro-pop, independent artist Megan Mortensen, aka Valeree, is taking a plunge into the R&B soundscape with the upcoming EP It’s Fine, I’m Fine. Bringing forward a hopeful message, the once-downand-out artist brings an honest illustration of perseverance and passion. With a round, resonating vocal hook reminiscent of Sara Bareilles, the introspective, new music brings refreshing life to the singer-songwriter genre.

Releases March 19, 2021.

Xiu Xiu

Oh No Personal tragedy births life into the latest release from Xiu Xiu, one that speaks of abandonment, dissolution, and new-found faith. Vanishing into darkness, singer-songwriter Jamie Stewart has emerged with an awakening that bridges the gap of familiar intimacy and vulnerable experimentalism. From standout duets with Sharon Van Etten, George Lewis Jr. with Twin Shadow, and Chelsea Wolfe, the new tracks provide haunting textures, crunchy vocals, and pulsing beats.

HIGH NOTE

Adult Mom: Driver

The new, 10-track release, and third, full, studio LP, Driver is everything you want out of a young person’s rom-com soundtrack, if the queer kids finally got to write the script. The indie-rock outfit Adult Mom, led by genderqueer singer-songwriter Stevie Knipe, delivers a new kind of narrative for the coming-of-age story. Adult Mom is newly signed with label Epitaph Records, dumping their former representation, and their new music is a reflection of that newfound liberty via sonic exploration. Responding to the tingle of freedom, wanderlust, and rebellion, Driver arrives in time as an anthem to the primed and restless youth of 2021. Falling in and out of love is part of the human experience for many, wading through the mud of selfdeprecation and self-actualization. The album opens with the pining love song “Passenger,” with emotion and vulnerability drawing us into the clutch of Knipe’s next line. The driving, guitar-centric tracks “Wisconsin,” “Breathing,” and “Adam” break up the crooners that Adult Mom lusciously delivers. Serving up a Cranberries, yodel vibe, “Dancing” brings me back to the 00s, driving my beat-up Corolla on the way to a brutal breakup with my first girlfriend. The vibes coming off the lead single“Sober” feels like an icy breeze of reality, an anthem of that moment of do-or-die in a relationship, and you finally realize that you’re better off without that lover who was dragging you down. Slipping into the bedroom-pop, country essence of “Regret It,” the unyielding tempo paired with astute perception will keep you holding on until the album clincher, “Frost.” In these tracks, Knipe shares moments of raw reflection, opening the door to their own inner-thoughts that are relateable, authentic, and overwhelmingly sensible. This album is not for the faint of feeling; get ready to buckle up with Driver and get deep in those emotions.

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MODS

Tattooing and Letting Femme Flourish

by Keegan Williams

An ode to the strangers in my life who have approached me with unexpected questions about my skin, it’s finally time: I’m talking about my tattoos.

Last issue, I started the conversation on body modifications historically as a way people tell stories about themselves, their lives, and their identities; how body modification can be an inherent link to queerness, gender, and body affirmation; and specifically, my relationship to body modification in that regard.

I recently came out as nonbinary to my family, friends, work (and, I guess, everyone reading this now; hello!) following a near-year of pandemic isolation and intimate self-reflection, and I’m unsure if or when I would have understood my gender in the way I do today had I not stopped drinking in July 2018.

Like many folks in recovery, I realized I was stunted around the age I started drinking in excess, moving out on my own at 19. Over the 30-ish months

I’ve been sober, my authentic self was able to flourish, and one way I can easily measure the change is looking at the evolution of my tattoos.

Not to say the work I embraced pre-sobriety was inherently manly or male, but the earth-toned, art-nouveau, animalthemed sleeve on my right arm surely embraces the more masculine parts of myself.

My hand is donning a red-and-orange, bug-eyed goldish sitting atop a jet-black background. When I looked to tattoo my other hand the year after (and coincidentally, on the oneyear anniversary of my sobriety), I kept saying, “My right hand feels so masculine. I just want to balance it out.”

My most visible, femme-leaning ink at the time was a dainty, linework flower on my left, middle finger. I introduced a sparkling, pastel, heart-shaped jewel with an eyelashed, purple eye in the center on my left hand surrounded by glitter, and wearing something prominently that was so femme was just one way I can recall my tattoo preferences and gender expression shifting around the same time.

Ironically, later that year, under the fish on my right hand, I impulsively plopped four heart outlines on each knuckle. I came up with the idea the day before the appointment; I don’t think I was even planning to tattoo my knuckles necessarily. I was just in San Francisco to visit a friend and wanted a tattoo. If I were to get the, “What do those mean?” question for those, the answer would simply be, “I thought it would look cute.”

(Honestly, I could say the same for the bulk of my recent tattoos.)

During my first full, booze-free year, I also started slowly replacing my fairly drab closet that I could mostly describe as, “My mom had Kohl’s Cash” and “leftover from 2010.” I went down two shirt sizes following other lifestyle changes (which also helped me feel more healthy and comfortable in my body) and currently have a collection of pinks, pastels, and patterns that feel much more in line with myself today.

I’ve since moved from Denver to Los Angeles, and the tattoos I’ve gotten here exclusively embrace my femininity. I have a number of appointments in San Diego this spring specifically to fill out my chest piece (currently a piece of vacant, sacred geometry I got when I was 19) with floral work. I’m enjoying the act of improving upon my previous work over covering it, making what I had in mind then more in line with who I know myself to be today.

It’s a relief to be open about and more comfortable with my gender, as someone who feels more at ease with their femininity than they ever did trying to embody masculinity, or squeeze into the ill-fitting suit of ‘man’ all their life. And, obviously, there is a lot more that went into my coming out and embracing life as a nonbinary person than my tattoos.

However, trans people have this amazing power of evolution and continuously shifting into their best, authentic selves, and having blossomed so heavily recovering from active alcoholism over the past couple years, I love seeing my tattoos shift with my gender and sense of self, especially because this change was taking place before I could even quantify what was truly happening. As someone who is often cis-assumed, tattooing is a way for me to embrace all parts of my gender and expression in a personal and highly visible way. I am heavily tattooed compared to most of the population, and I share a sentiment with many tattooed people that, while I usually book multiple appointments a year, I’m saving space for the memories and pieces I want to newly adorn my body at later stages in my life.

One of the magical parts of tattooing is looking back at your body and being able to see your journey in life on your own terms, and with the gender euphoria and new freedom I’ve experienced since coming out and being open about myself, I’m eager to see how the story pans out.

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skin that is fierce

by Angel Rivera

Dark spots, your spots, even hot spots. Some of us have them; others are lying. Also known as hyperpigmentation, dark spots can be the bane to any skin lover’s good day. Hyperpigmentation comes about on the skin in a couple of different ways:

1. Too much sun exposure. I know you hear this a lot, but getting too much sun on your face without an SPF is not just bad for aging but also causes scarring from acne or buildups of melanin that cause an uneven tone to your natural skin color.

2. Leave your acne alone! As satisfying as picking out that black head or popping that whopper of a pimple can be, it not only leaves behind a gash, but is the number-one cause for that spot you hate so much.

Good news though: You don’t have to wait for dark spots to go away or live with them forever; you can get rid of them. First and foremost, hyperpigmentation is not bad, nor should you feel the need to change yourself. However, sometimes you want that flawless, skin finish that you see on your Snapchat filter. To treat these pesky spots and sometimes blotches on skin, you need to remember that patience is a virtue … but who said a little push won’t help?

All skin is different, and different skin requires different methods. When looking for products, it is always good to note that some acids and some retinol/noids can cause photosensitivity, and you should be wearing an SPF to avoid irritation from the sun as well as sunburns.

Some amazing products to help you on your way to an even skin tone are, of course, “acids.” No, not anything scary, but things like lactic acid, malic acid, or azelaic acid that can help with mild hyperpigmentation. These acids speed up the skin cell turnover rate, which in turn makes skin look brighter and relieves dullness from everyday stress. Use acids such as these in between your toning and moisturizing of your skin to help the serums penetrate deep into your skin.

If you are looking for a more concentrated approach, then products with hydroquinone or licorice root extract are highly effective as spot treatments. The former ingredient above is more suited for people with lighter skin, as it can inhibit the production of melanin while it is being used and should be avoided by people with darker skin tones.

The highest percentage of hydroquinone you can receive without a prescription is 2 percent because it is that strong. So, use with caution, and use sparingly, as such a potent ingredient is not to be used all over the face.

Now, if you are looking for something that will brighten your skin and help even skin tone in a more natural manner, then vitamin C is for you. Not only is this vitamin important for keeping away scurvy, but it also helps with brightening your skin’s color and relieve mild dark spots.

When looking for a good vitamin-C serum it is always good to note that L-ascorbic acid is a form of vitamin C in its “purest” form and is highly effective for treating dark spots.

However, if you are looking for a more costeffective way to treat dark spots, you are in luck because you can treat dark spots at home with things in your cabinet.

First is the famous matcha mask, which is one tablespoon of honey, a teaspoon of matcha powder, and finally, a teaspoon of water to get the emulsion ready. Green tea, especially in its matcha form, is great as a natural anti-inflammatory that mildly inhibits melanin over-production.

Or, you can simply brew your morning green tea, and after it cools, you can apply the tea bag to and massage any problem areas to help your skin drink in the goodness.

One final method is using a two-to-one, apple cider vinegar toner, using two parts water to vinegar, as the malic acid in apple cider vinegar also is a great, skin-brightening toner.

Lastly, before you try any new products or any home remedies, always remember to spot-test on your forearm or even hand before trying a product, because the last thing you want is to use a product that could be bad for your skin.

Do not forget these are not overnight treatments, and consistency is key when targeting a problem. We here at OFM want you to serve looks, not lumps.

BLACK, LGBTQ FASHION BRANDS TO WATCH

Get the LOOK

by Angel Rivera

When getting into fashion, it is always important to look at the people behind the sewing machine and mannequins, as it is these visionaries that make the looks we want to serve. Here is a peak at some LGBTQ- and Blackowned fashion brands to keep on your radar this year.

Christopher John Rogers. The self-named fashion brand only launched a couple of years ago but is on an ascending, high-fashion ladder. Even garnering himself a CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund award for his bold silhouettes and amazing use of bright and beautiful colors, Christopher John Rogers is looking to be one of the biggest names in fashion if he keeps up his immaculate work.

Hood by Air. An amalgamation of high fashion and streetwear inspired by iconic, ballroom culture is the brainchild of Shayne Oliver, who wanted to create fashion that is genderless but evokes the high-fashion gods. Oliver calls this “power wear.” Celebs like A$AP Rocky and Rihanna have been seen wearing Hood by Air. Though on a hiatus from 2017 and most of 2019, Hood by Air is on a steady rise to the top again.

Phlemuns. Founded by James Flemons, this L.A.based brand has become a quick favorite of Lil Nas X and Hayley Williams of Paramore fame. Flemons embraces a gender-fluid design that is meant to be worn for and by anyone. His bright color choice, pattern-melding, and gender inclusivity have even gotten him a small documentary from Vice that takes a look at his thought process and design philosophy.

Stuzo. Another L.A.-based brand, this company is not only Black-owned, but women-owned as well. Founded by Stoney Michelli, she is not only the founder but heads the design team and is a graphic designer. The brand prides itself on its “gender-free” clothing, melding street wear and avant-garde pieces together to bring bold looks and muted pallets to anyone with an urge for something that goes against the grain.

Telfar. Created by Liberian-American Telfar Williams, who is another winner of the prestigious CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund, this brand has become a cult classic due to an iconic, square tote that went viral on twitter. Telfar uses street wear as his canvas of choice, making products at moderate prices with recognizability. The titular brand is iconic among Brooklyn denizens and is getting acclaim around the U.S. due to the collaboration with Converse. This is only a miniscule look at Black-owned, LGBTQ fashion brands; there are many more out there. There are brands that range from iconic to on the rise and are worth a look.

Fashion itself is ever-evolving and is in need of a face lift, and these young designers are taking gender inclusivity and running with it. Fashion is not just an expression of the wearer, but an expression of the designer, creating how they see the world and reflecting it upon the clothing that they so lovingly craft.