CreativeResearchZinePart1 StayingOpen,StayingSafe
StayingOpen,StayingSafe byDeeLister
Part1 ofthethree-partseriesaboutDeeLister’straumainformedcreativeresearch.
Copyright/permissions:
Thezineseriesandallimagesandwordsfeaturedare ownedDeeLister©
Allworkrelatingtothecreativeresearch,includingthezines, weremadewiththepermissionandsupportofOutsideIn andthe BritishArtNetwork.
TheMuseumoftheMindkindlyprovidedaccessand permissionstouseBethlemHospital’sarchivedmaterials.
Acknowledgements:
Thankyoutoeveryonewhosupportedme.Specialthanksto SarahKetalaars,DavidLuck,KirkSummerwill,Naomiand Emma,Morag,Dolly,Teddy,andNorri,andmyOutsideIn mentorsJoDollandCharlotteGraham-Spouge.Finally thankyoutoyoureaderforbeinganaudienceformywork.
TriggerWarning:
1.IntroductiontoPart1
StayingOpen,StayingSafe isthefirstofathree-partzine seriesaboutmytrauma-informedcreativeresearch.
IreceivedabursaryforthisworkfromtheNewDialogues researchgroup.Toreadaboutthisseehttps:// britishartnetwork.org.uk/research/new-dialogues-artcreated-historically-in-mental-health-settings/
Inthezineseriesyou’llseediverseartIcreatedin responsetomentalhealthart*.Thisisartthattapsinto thethemeofmentalhealth,orwasmadeinmentalhealth settingsorbysomeonewhoexperiences/experienced mentalhealthissues.
Iconsidermyselfasactiveintheresearchprocessand creativepractise.Iaimedtoreflectonmyprocessand documentitthroughouttheproject,whichIthankfully haveexperienceoffromPhDresearch.
Ialsosoughttoenjoytheprocessofdoingthiswork! Goingatmyownpaceandkeepingmyselfsafemattered. This(andI,you)alwaysmatter.Iapproacheddoingthis workthoughasan‘insider’livingwithmentalhealth issuesandcomplextrauma.
*Iusetheterm mentalhealthart forpragmaticreasons butamawareit’sproblematicinassumingthementaland physicalrealmsofexperienceareseparated.They’renot.
(Top)‘Aims’,(Bottom)‘Enjoytheprocess’
2.ProcessDiary
Ikeptaprocessdiaryofdoodlesandwordsfrom researchproposaltowriteup(i.e.makingthezinesand presentingthework)stages.
Idrewontheideaofa‘TwineLine’inthediary‘entries’.A reframeoftimeline,thisideaisanodto‘BallofTwine andOtherNonsense’byWilliamKurelek.
Thepiecewascreatedinthe1950s,alongwithother piecesmadeduringKurelek’stimebeingtreatedinthe Maudsley(Bethlem’ssisterhospital).Ienjoyhisworkand founditlesstriggeringthansomeothermentalhealthart.
Myprocessdiaryisliketheplotofastory.It’sthe narrativethread(punintended!)thatpromptedthe creativeworkthatfollowed.
Likemyeverydaycreativepractise,spacetodoodleand writeeach‘entry’freely,neverwithanyforethoughtbefore pentouchedpaper,helpedmeprocessandunblockwhen Igottiedupinknotspreventingmemakingprogress.
Thesnakingflowofmyprocessdiaryispossibletosee becauseofthechoiceofaconcertinasketchbook(see ‘flowofresearchprocess’image.
Theexcerptsfrommyprocessdiary,whichalsoincluded asmalllinednotebook,revealinterestingdifferencesin themark-makinganduseofblankspaceonthepaper.
(Top)‘How/doInarrowdown’,(Middle) ‘Diggingdeepish’,(Bottom)‘Researchermole’
3.DrawingBoundaries
Likeallprojectstherewerefiniteresources:thetime andenergyIhaveperdayasapersonlivingwith disabilityandchronicillnessandlimitedfinanceswere keyfactorsshapingwhatIcouldachieveduringthe five-monthproject.
DoingthiscreativeresearchneededboundariessoI couldkeepmyselfsafe.Traversingthisunknown territorymademeacutelyaware,notforthefirsttimein recentyears,ofhowmycreativeprocessandtrauma recoveryareseamlesslyintertwined.Theyflow together.
AnyonewhohasseenmycreativeworkwillknowI write pause toechobackawaytoregainpresenceand checkinwithmyself,thenself-sootheifneeded.
ThefollowingsectionshowshowIdrewliteral boundariesandwrotecompassionatewordsusingart materialstolookaftermyself.
Thesewerenurturingandcatharticcreativebreaks fromtherawemotiveresearchmaterialthatalso remindedmenottooverwork,whichisatrauma responseofmine.
‘BigPAUSE’
‘Keepingmyselfsteady’
byBarbaraHonywood
4InspiredArtmaking
Theresearchunfoldedinunexpectedways.The ‘TwineLine’wasn’trigid.Itwasfluidandmalleable.
Ihadfullcreativefreedom-thankyoutomyOutsideIn projectmentorsforthismagicalamountofspace!SoI initiallysoughtinspirationonlineviathementalhealth artcollectionsaffiliatedwiththeNewDialoguesgroup.
Thisdecisionthatwasshapedbymyaccessneedsas someonewholiveswithcomplextrauma(orC-PTSD) andexperiencesdisabiilty.Iknewworkingfromhome offeredasaferspacetoself-regulateandcreateatwill. Therewasanaddedbenefitthoughofaddressingthe societalissueoftherebeinganinequityinwhocan accesstotheartworld.
AnyonereadingthiszinecanlookuptheartIwas inspiredbyontheMuseumoftheMindwebsite. Detailsareincludedbelowtheimagesandthelink: https://museumofthemind.org.uk/collections/gallery
IshareartworksthatIbeganasdoodlesduring creativemomentsandthatgainedmomentumin respondinginsomewaytothethemesortechniques ofotherartists’mentalhealthart.
‘Feelingstrungout’.InspiredbyWilliam Kurelek‘BallofTwineandOtherNonsense’
‘Ifonlytheyknew’InspiredbyMud‘MRIScan’
‘PowerInHerSong’InspiredbyLyndaBamford’s ‘PsychadelicWoman’
StayingOpenStayingSafe is partone ofthe three-partzineseriesaboutartistDeeLister’s trauma-informedcreativeresearch.
Eachzineoffersmentalhealthart–artworkmade byDeewho’satraumasurvivorwholiveswith mentalhealthissues–andwordstoprovide contexttotheartshared.
ThiszinegoesintodepthaboutDee’swayof approachingthecreativeresearch.Theimportant issueoffindingwaystokeepourselvessafewhen engagingwithmentalhealthartmaterialis sensitivelydiscussed.Examplesofdoodlesand otherartinspiredbytheprocessisshared.
Adigitalversionofthefullzinecanbereadhere: https://linktr.ee/deelisterphotos.
Printcopiesofparts1,2,and3areavailableon requestfromdeelisterphotos@gmail.com.