Falling Behind: When, How, What

Falling Behind: When, How and What To Do

STORY Kalisha Fitsch

Children spend at least 12 years of their lives in school, learning everything from tying their shoelaces to complicated equations and much more. Learning these skills can be vital to success in life, which is why falling behind is a common concern for parents.

Falling behind is very common, but it can have lasting effects. A study by the charity Save the Children found that 84 per cent of children who were falling behind by the age of seven would be behind to some degree for the rest of their academic career. It’s estimated that 10 to 16 per cent of students struggle with their learning due to a variety of reasons. These struggles can be a cause of low self-esteem and frustration for the child, so how does this happen, and what can be done to help? Some Signs Your Child May be Falling Behind

Of course, all parents want their children to be happy and successful in life, and it can be difficult to realise that your child isn’t keeping up with their peers in school. Kids aren’t always open to talking about school, but there are a few signs you may pick up on from an outside point of view that may signify that something is off.

Developmental delays. Young children develop at their own rates, and some may need a longer to build up certain skills. It’s a good idea to look into developmental milestones for your child’s age and what skills are needed for each grade. For instance, before starting prep, your child should know how to put on their shoes, go to the toilet on their own and eat and drink without help.

The teacher expresses concern. Your child’s teacher teaches a room full of students the same material, and they’ll be quick to pick up on any changes.

Their grades drop. While receiving one or two bad grades doesn’t necessarily indicate a delay, if you’re beginning to notice a pattern of poor grades, this could be the sign of a problem.

Recognise patterns. Take note of your child and you may pick up on repeating patterns, such as being exhausted after school, struggling with homework from a certain subject or even refusing to go to school altogether on certain days, such as when there is a big test. You might also notice them making comments such as “I can’t do it” or “I’m dumb”. Questions about how things are going at school may be met with short answers, such as “boring,” “nothing,” and “fine”. School work is too difficult. The work they are being given at school may be above their current level.

What You Can Do to Help

Depending on what is causing your child’s delays, whether it’s a learning disability, loss of interest or emotional issue, there are a few things you can do to help to gradually help them get back on track.

Let them know it’s ok. While it can be worrying for the parent to know their child is falling behind, it can be a difficult situation for the child, too. When their grades drop, their self-esteem can, too. Remind them that everyone struggles with things throughout life, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of.

Talk to their teacher. Just like you, the teacher wants the best for your child. Arrange a time to speak to your child’s teacher and discuss your concerns. They may be able to refer your child to someone within the school who can help, such as a special education teacher.

They begin misbehaving. If your child begins acting out in a way that is out of character, especially at school, this could be a good indication that something is amiss. Sometimes, this takes the attention away from the fact that they are struggling, or they may lack the social skills necessary to speak up and admit that they’re having difficulties.

Why do Children Fall Behind?

Okay, so you’ve noticed that your child may be struggling with some things academically here and there. Your next question may be “But why? Have I done something wrong? Could I have helped them more?”

There is no one answer as to why this is happening, but there are a few possible reasons.

Learning difficulties. If your child has autism, ADHD or dyslexia, this could be why they’re struggling. A large portion of children with these conditions are undiagnosed as well, so it’s something you may want to consider.

Emotional problems. Problems at home (such as divorce) or at school (such as bullying) can be a great source of stress for the child, and can subsequently cause them to fall behind in their schoolwork. If unaddressed, these can lead to anxiety or depression. Avoid severe punishments. Grounding them until their grades improve, not allowing them to see their friends or taking away their electronics is not necessary, and may even make the situation worse. However, it is a good idea to set up technology-free times for studying (“You can play your game when your homework is done.”)

Read together. Literacy is the most important skill for children to master, as they’ll need a good understanding of it to excel in every other subject. Encourage them to read every day, and read to them from a young age. Instilling a love of literature can greatly benefit them.

Provide some motivation. Offering a small reward can help motivate your child to work harder to improve their grades, given that the target is achievable for them (“If you pass your spelling test, you can get a treat from the shop.”).

Look into tutoring. School teachers have 25 or so children to teach on a daily basis. Private tutors offer one-on-one teaching, which might be just what your child needs if they are struggling in a particular area of their education.

The Bottom Line

Falling behind isn’t the end of the world. Remember that each child is different, and there may be a number of reasons as to why their schoolwork is suffering. While falling behind can be challenging and stressful, your child can still learn and thrive.