5 minute read
Palatidates
from Palatinate 843
by Palatinate
Katie and Yuta, Marketing and Management and History students from South College, meet for a blind date at Spags
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Katie on Yuta Yuta on Katie
What were your first impressions of your date?
Well, we were actually in the same household in first year so our first impression was a while ago.
What did you talk about?
We just had a catch up on everything as it had been a while since we last saw each other, and we shared some college gossip.
How would they describe you?
From the date he would probably say I’m a pretty normal girl, but from when we lived together he’d probably tell a different story of how chaotic I can be.
How would you describe them?
He’s a lovely guy, he has always been very genuine and nothing but nice to me.
If they were a Durham night out, which would they be and why?
Players Wednesday because he’s sporty and I have seen him there before.
What were you hoping for? Did they deliver on your expectations?
I was hoping to join the 70% of married alumni from my blind date, but considering I already knew him, I don’t think we’re falling in love anytime soon.
Would you introduce them to your friends or family?
I’m pretty sure he already met my parents whilst moving in.
Would you like to see them again?
I doubt we’ll be going anywhere as intimate as Spags again anytime soon but I’d definitely say hi if I saw him around.
Marks out of 10?
7
(Anna Kuptsova)
What were your first impressions of your date?
I already knew her so it was a bit of a weird situation.
What did you talk about?
Just general catch up since we lived with each other last year.
How would they describe you?
A normal bloke.
How would you describe them?
A friendly girl.
Most awkward moment?
When we met up and we knew that we knew each other.
If they were a Durham night out, which would they be and why?
Players because we were both there the night before.
What were you hoping for? Did they deliver on your expectations?
I was hoping to meet someone that I didn’t know, but I already knew her so in a sense that didn’t happen.
What would you have changed about the experience?
Meeting someone new that I didn’t know.
Would you introduce them to your friends or family?
No.
Would you like to see them again?
Not in a romantic setting.
Marks out of 10?
5
PalatiPets
Think you have the cutest pet? Email editor@palatinate.org.uk with three pictures and 100 words explaining why for a chance to be featured in print
Ben on Honey
This is Honey: ball-chaser, boneeater, girlboss. She deserves to be included in this print edition because she is super organised and never late to an appointment, you can always count on her to be there for her morning snack at 8am and main meal at 6pm.
She may be extremely kind and very giving (mainly of toys soaked in her saliva), but don’t you dare call her ‘sweetheart’. Honey may sound sweet, but she’s got a tough side too — you can see her strutting up to the guys, our cats Pringle and Pretzel, and scaring them away with a ferocious lick or two. Scary stuff.
Rebecca on Fudge & Toffee
The boys of my little cat family are Fudge and Toffee, or, as I call them, Mr Grumble and Mr Toffs.
Born almost six years ago, they have been the sweeties of their mum, Cindie, and Auntie Rosie’s lives ever since. I say almost because their birthday is coming up on the 24th of November, and, although I am at university, I know that they will keep me posted on their Insta @garden_0f_cats. Their main hobby is sleeping and, when they are not sleeping, fighting. However, like all brothers, they love each other really.
This is Rex (the labradoodle) and his girlfriend, Bessie (the flatcoat). They met in the local park in South London and became best friends. Bessie passed away a few years ago but Rex is yet to find another friend like her. Rex likes to go up to every dog in the park and say hello, but because of his size little dogs often bark him away. Bessie was equally lovely but more reserved with her friend choices. Rex is the calmest dog in the world and is basically a big carpet. He is the perfect hugging dog — though I’m yet to convince Principal Wendy to let me keep him in the Castle as a therapy dog.
Aiken on Rex Ask Aunty Violet
QHATFIELD
Dear Violet, I just don’t know what to do. I swear I spend more time cleaning my room than anything else. Every morning I wake up to a mess, I’ll clean the entire day and then it’ll still be a mess come morning. What should I do?
A
Dear darling, I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling with maintaining the tidiness of your room. It’s a reccuring problem for students at Durham who are too used to having servants clear up after them.
I find it’s beneficial to dispose of your possessions if you are struggling to manage them all, really, the more extreme the method, the better. It may surprise you to learn that scientists have concluded that students typically only need four items in their room: a towel, LED strip lights, 3-15 dirty mugs and a drawer of college stash. All items excluding these are considered optional so feel free to rid yourself of the excess and save you time on cleaning!
QHILD BEDE
Dear Violet, I’ve been finding it very difficult to maintain my relationship with my boyfriend who is living in Ustinov college this year. It’s a really long walk and everyone makes fun of me for saying that I’ve made him up because he never comes round. Please can you provide some advice?
A
Dearest honey, I know how difficult long-distance relationships can be. I completely sympathise with your predicament.
It really is unfortunate that you’ve ended up on completely different sides of the city. However you should take every problem as an opportunity to grow: in this case, think about gaining that Durham bum.
