Lean On Me

A Summer Camp that Helps with Grief

By Cathy Spear

WHEN A YOUNG GIRL’S PARENT DIES, HER CHILDHOOD IS FOREVER

ALTERED. Huge challenges lie ahead of her as she confronts a life that is suddenly very different from what it used to be

Circle Camps for Grieving Children opened its first program, Circle of Tapawingo, in southwestern Maine in 2002 to help young girls feel less alone in their grief. This summer, the organization is planning to serve almost 300 girls at its camps in Maine, New Hampshire, West Virginia and California.

Each camp offers six days of traditional overnight camp activities, including swimming, canoeing, ropes courses, basketball, arts and crafts, archery, dance and talent shows. Campers live together in cabins and share in all of the summertime fun that make overnight camp experiences meaningful. Campers return year after year, so they can experience Circle as an ongoing piece of their childhood.

Throughout the week, grief activities are woven into the schedule. On the second day, under the guidance of a licensed professional, each bunk comes together for “Circle Time.” This time offers the girls a chance to share memories of their deceased parents with their cabin-mates. Craft projects allow girls to memorialize their parents. Other grief activities encourage girls to think about the changes that have occurred in their lives and to address the many feelings that arise; and coping strategies are offered.

Late in the week, there is an evening campfire that focuses gently on the theme of endings. A service held on the final morning of camp is especially meaningful as all campers and counselors place a personally inscribed rock in a memory garden. And throughout the week, there are spontaneous conversations – in the cabins, on walks down to the lake, during rest hour – that help campers feel supported and connected to each other.

When older campers look back on their time at Circle, they talk about “making friendships that will last a lifetime” and “finally being with other girls who get it.”

Despite the challenges that may confront campers in their lives, the days at Circle Camps are typically filled with smiles and laughter. Circle offers its campers a time to really play – and to play hard! The dining room is filled with sounds of songs and cheers that lift spirits and remind us all of the potential for fun in childhood summers.

When older campers look back on their time at Circle, they talk about “making friendships that will last a lifetime” and “finally being with other girls who get it.”

Circle of Tapawingo not only offers a Camper Program for girls ages 9 to12 and a Teen Program for girls ages 13 to 14, but graduates may apply to a Counselor-In- Training program that provides them with the opportunity to work with younger campers, as well as to participate in their own activities that encourage more sharing and exploration of their grief.

And last year’s newest program for alumnae, CircleSummit, was a five-day, outdoor leadership experience that included hiking in the White Mountains. The participants glowed with pride when they talked about stretching their limits and summiting Mt. Washington.

Circle Camps aim to reach out to more girls for whom life has not always been easy. All the programs are entirely free to campers, and transportation is provided from central points. To inquire about the camp or to register a prospective camper, please contact Cathy Spear at cathyspear@ circlecamps.org.

Cathy Spear, LICSW, is director of camper services