A boarding parent's perspective

A boarding parent's perspective

Prema Sexton - Mother of Grace Sexton (Year 11 boarder)

On Monday 28 January 2019, time stood still.

Grace left our family farm in Cuballing and set off to begin her greatest adventure yet: Grace was heading off to boarding school. We packed the car full to the roof and squeezed into our seats for the journey to Perth.

It was the strangest of days for me; one of the happiest, but also one of the most heart-wrenching. While we were saying goodbye to local friends and connections, we were also on the way to fulfilling our hopes and dreams for Grace. I think the anticipation of exciting opportunities and growth went some way at least to balancing out our fears.

Belonging to the Penrhos community was something we had always strived for as a family, we always dreamt of Grace being able to access a range of subjects and innovative learning environments, and Penrhos had an outstanding reputation in the boarding community, so we were thrilled when Grace secured her place at the College. We knew she would have all kinds of opportunities to grow, to thrive and to become a strong young woman; we knew she would experience a wide range of academic and sporting offerings, and we knew she would be welcomed into a diverse and vibrant community that celebrates individual successes and strengths.

As a mother, I felt for a long time that the days I had to farewell Grace would not get easier. The first term we spent apart consisted of long-awaited visits ending with long, tearful drives back to Perth. There were late-night phone calls, more tears, and those inevitable moments filled with guilt and wondering as we asked ourselves ‘have we done the right thing?’

Fast forward to 2022 and it all seems so distant - those hard moments seem so insignificant now. With the positive support of everyone at the Penrhos Boarding House, my ‘mummy blues’ quickly calmed as I learned to step back and appreciate all the ‘growing up’ our daughter was doing how much she was enjoying it!

It was important to us that Grace would feel part of a bigger boarding ‘family’ while also having her own personal space. The design of the Boarding House definitely helped with this over the years, with the College’s focus on independence really shining out for us. Our daughter was encouraged to stand on her own two feet and, in doing so, she found the confidence to start making some great decisions and find new networks for herself.

The connections Grace made with fellow boarders, day students and across the wider community are what helped her continue to transition so well from our regional community to Perth. Our family was made to feel welcome by other boarding families at social events, and we have very much valued the strong, supportive network of other mums, upon which we have depended for helpful advice or a kind, listening ear.

I frequently had a revolving door of boarding ‘sisters’, who returned home with Grace during long weekends, and we enjoyed getting to know new friends from all over WA. The joy and laughter these young women brought when they came to stay was incredible - and Grace was fortunate to also be invited to visit some of her friends during breaks too. She treasures these special memories and I know they will be priceless to her in future life.

The friendships Grace forged also extended to many day girls - so many exceptional families treated our daughter as one of their own, ferrying her around to sporting training and events in football, rowing and hockey. With their assistance, Grace was able to access these co-curricular opportunities and for this we have been so very thankful. In return, we have enjoyed bringing some ‘city kids’ back to the farm to teach them to drive, ride a motorbike, sort piglets and help with harvesting.

Grace has always loved connecting with others; she thrives when she can assist and support those around her. The modelling and guidance she received at Penrhos - from both older and younger students, from staff and across the wider community - has been nothing short of phenomenal. I know Grace’s connections will continue to grow beyond the school gates and will serve her well in what promises to be her successful future.

Grace’s younger brother has since begun his own boarding adventure at Penrhos’ brother school, Wesley College. I am so grateful for the positive experience we had with Grace, there is no doubt the experience helped make his start smoother; it’s so nice that she can now even give him an encouraging wave at combined College events.

Time no longer stands still for us; instead, it rushes by far too quickly. Despite our best efforts to slow the pace and enjoy the ride, the end of Grace’s school journey is fast approaching.

Impending graduation events and milestones will be met with tears of pure joy and pride in our achievements as a family and wider College community. Our daughter’s heart is bigger, braver and stronger because of her boarding experience at Penrhos, and so is mine.