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Wedding Guide 2011
Wedding Guide
Pittsburgh Catholic 1
Kelly Johnson Wedding Coordinator Radisson Hotel Pittsburgh 101 Radisson Drive Pittsburgh, PA 15205
412.353.8155 kelly.johnson@camhosp.com
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Wedding Guide 2011
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Inside this issue: 7 | Getting married in the Catholic Church:
How to avoid problems and misunderstandings when planning for that important day.
11 | Some frequently asked questions about marriage:
“Why does a Catholic wedding have to take place in a church?�
Wedding Guide 2011
Pittsburgh Catholic 3
PITTSBURGH
Catholic Wedding Guide 135 First Ave. • Suite 200 Pittsburgh, PA 15222 1-800-392-4670 www.pittsburghcatholic.org Vol. 2, No. 1 Publisher | Bishop David A. Zubik
24
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16 | Local couples celebrate:
Wedding and engagement announcements from across the diocese.
24 | Don’t get overwhelmed:
Some straight advice in dealing with all those details in planning your wedding.
28 | The Pre-Marriage Program:
Sessions run once a week and couples must pre-register by mail. A complete list of pre-Cana classes and locations.
31 | The international scene:
Brides and grooms from all over the world share their big day in photos.
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On the cover...
Wedding Guide
Catholic PITTSBU
We rejoice that so many couples are living in fidelity to their marital commitment. We thank them for proclaiming in their daily lives the beauty, goodness, and truth of marriage. In countless ways, both ordinary and heroic, through good times and bad, they bear witness to the gift and blessing they have received from the hand of their Creator. We are grateful, too, for all those who work with young people and engaged couples to establish good marriages, who help married couples to grow in love and strengthen their union, and who help those in crisis to resolve their problems and bring healing to their lives. “Marriage: Love and Life in the Divine Plan,” U.S. Bishops’ Pastoral Letter on Marriage (2009) Cover design by Debbie Skatell-Wehner
General Manager | Robert P. Lockwood Editor | William Cone Operations Manager | Carmella Weismantle Wedding Guide Project Editor William Cone Associate Editors Phil Taylor (Special Projects) Chuck Moody (News) Senior Staff Writer | Patricia Bartos Staff Writer | John W. Franko Graphic Designers David Pagesh | Debbie Skatell-Wehner Director of Advertising | John Connolly Account Executives Michael A. Check | Paul Crowe Michael Wire Circulation Mgr./Parish News Coord. Peggy Zezza Administrative Assistant | Amanda Wahlen
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Office Assistant | Caitlin Arendash-Labyoda
Pittsburgh Catholic Wedding Guide is a complimentary publication of the Pittsburgh Catholic Publishing Associates, available at all 208 Catholic parishes in the Diocese of Pittsburgh.
Advertising: ads@pittsburghcatholic.org Editorial: editor@pittsburghcatholic.org
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Pittsburgh Catholic 5
Resources before and after the wedding Engaged Encounter Catholic Engaged Encounter helps prepare engaged couples for married life. Through a series of writings and shared exercises, couples are invited to explore many aspects of their relationship, spiritual lives and expectations of marriage. Weekends are led by two married couples who give a series of brief presentations about issues, such as communication, commitment, conflict resolution, values, the roles of faith and the sacrament of marriage. Couples have time and space to share their thoughts and feelings privately with one another.
Schedule of weekends: • Aug. 26 and Oct. 21, 2011, Gilmary Retreat Center, 601 Flaugherty Run
Road, Findlay Township. Cost: $250. For more information or to register, call 412-861-0262, or visit www. PittsburghEngagedEncounter.org.
Worldwide Marriage Encounter A Worldwide Marriage Encounter weekend is a renewal time for couples interested in opening up new pathways of communication and commitment. The weekend allows married couples to escape the everyday distractions of life and focus attention on each other. Couples are able to restore their commitment and rekindle the romance during their own personal sharing. Marriage Encounter Weekends are presented by a trained team consisting of three couples and a priest. Through a
J. Mark Prybyl, DDS “DENTIST WITH THE ANGEL’S TOUCH”
series of presentations given to the group as a whole, couples have the opportunity to look at themselves as individuals and at how they interact with each other. After each of the presentations, the couples are given personal reflection time and then time to share their reflections with their spouse in the privacy of their own room. There are no group discussions on the weekend. This experience is a private one between husband and wife.
Schedule of weekends: • Sept. 23-25, 2011, Four Points Sheraton Pittsburgh Airport, One Industry Lane, Moon Township. Cost: $75. • Nov. 11-13, Bishop Connare Center, 2900 Seminary Drive, Greensburg. Cost: $75. To register or for more information, call 412-635-7775, or visit www.wwmepittsburgh.org.
Retrouvaille Retrouvaille, a French word meaning “rediscovery,” is a weekend geared for couples with difficult and painful marital problems. Retrouvaille offers hope and help to couples considering separation, as well as those already separated or divorced who want to take another look at their marriage commitment. For confidential information or to talk with a couple, call 412-277-3434, or visit www. helpourmarriage.com.
Schedule of weekends:
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July 15-17 and Sept. 23-25, 2011, Gilmary Retreat Center, 601 Flaugherty Run Road, Findlay Township. Cost is $100, and registration is due the Tuesday before the weekend. To register, visit www. helpourmarriage.com, or call 412-277-2434.
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Wedding Guide 2011
Getting Married in the Catholic Church By the Staff of the Department for Canon and Civil Law Services
C
ouples considering marriage within the Diocese of Pittsburgh can avoid many problems and misunderstanding if they become familiar with the diocesan regulations for this foundational sacrament before they begin planning their wedding. Questions that one couple has are generally common questions that many couples have. The purpose of this article is to clarify and provide answers to some of these common questions.
When should the engaged couple contact a priest? The engaged couple should contact their parish priest to discuss their plans at least six months before their intended wedding date, since the church considers all plans tentative until the marriage applications and documents are completed. Additionally, there may be necessary steps that the couple needs to take if one or both of them have lived outside
of the Diocese of Pittsburgh as an adult, and these steps can be take time to complete. The priest determines if there is freedom and readiness to marry or if other reasons prevent the marriage from taking place in the Catholic Church.
Are marriage classes still required? Yes, marriage preparation classes are considered an important component of the couple’s readiness to assume marriage. Couples can choose from various formats contingent upon their personal
schedules and preferences. Four evening sessions are held in St. Mary of Mercy Parish, Downtown Pittsburgh, on Tuesday and Thursday evenings at certain times during the year. Engaged Encounter weekends (www. pittsburghengagedencounters.org) are held at various locations within the diocese. This consists of a Friday evening through Sunday afternoon format. Also various parishes throughout the diocese conduct their own classes. Couples should contact the Office for Adult and Family Faith Formation in the Diocese of Pittsburgh at 412-456-3160.
May I get married any day of the week? Weddings may not be performed on Sundays nor on holy days of obligation in the Diocese of Pittsburgh. Church law also prohibits weddings during the Easter See
MARRIAGE,
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Page 8
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MARRIAGE FROM PAGE 7 triduum — Holy Thursday to Holy Saturday. Though permitted, in serious circumstances, marriages are discouraged during the penitential season of Lent.
What happens when one of the couple is not Catholic? For a wedding to take place in the Catholic Church, at least one of the parties must be Catholic. Permission for this type of marriage is required from the diocesan bishop. To obtain permission from the diocesan bishop for a mixed marriage (a marriage in which each party is of a different faith), the Catholic party must sign documents stating he or she will do everything possible to remain in the faith and to raise children as Catholics. The non-Catholic party is to be aware of these promises but is not requested to sign any documents.
Can there be a nuptial Mass when one of the parties is not Catholic? Although is it not the norm, the law of the church permits the celebration of a nuptial Mass for the marriage of a Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic, if the couple wishes. Marriage between a Catholic and a nonbaptized person always take place outside of Mass.
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Why does the Catholic Church have these marriage requirements? For a marriage to be considered valid, a Catholic is required to contract marriage according to the “canonical form.” This means the marriage must take place in the presence of a properly delegated priest and two witnesses. Sometimes a bishop may grant a dispensation, or exemption, from the canonical form because he may believe the dispensation is necessary to help the couple achieve family harmony or to recognize a close relationship of a non-Catholic to his or her church. However, this ceremony may not be celebrated in a Catholic Church.
Is it possible to have a Catholic priest and a non-Catholic minister perform the ceremony? No, because canon law does not permit two distinct ceremonies. Similarly, services in which both the Catholic marriage ritual and the non-Catholic ritual are performed jointly or successively are not permitted. Also, for example, a priest may not elicit marital consent from the Catholic party while a minister elicits consent from the nonCatholic party. It is permitted, however, for a non-Catholic minister to participate in the Catholic marriage service. The minister may give
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May a non-Catholic bride or groom receive holy Communion at the wedding? No, it is not permitted. This is called inter-communion and it is not permitted at weddings, and permission will not be granted for inter-communion for a mixed marriage. Neither is holy Communion given to non-Catholic congregants who attend the wedding.
What happens when one of the parties has been married before? If one party has been previously married, See
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additional prayers, blessings or words of greeting or may read a lesson if the ceremony is not part of a Mass. In ceremonies of dispensation from canonical form, the Catholic Rite of Marriage is dispensed in favor of the non–Catholic party’s wedding service, which takes place in a nonCatholic church. The Catholic priest may or may not be present. If he is present, the priest may participate by giving additional prayers or blessings at the end of the service, but since, he is not the official celebrant, the Catholic priest does not sign the license or receive the consent from either party.
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MARRIAGE FROM PAGE 8
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couples should be advised to discuss the details of the prior marriage(s) with the priest before setting a wedding date. It is best not to assume that a prior marriage “did not count” or that it is a simple matter of submitting certain documents. A priest is not to set a wedding date for a couple until documents have been issued resolving the question of a prior marriage. This might be an involved matter resulting in a final decree of nullity following a formal nullity (annulment) process or it might be a more simple matter of a decree or the submission of a death certificate. The best advice is to have the necessary decrees or documents in hand before considering a wedding date as confirmed. This advice is given to avoid cancellation of wedding venues, bands, invitations, etc. if the wedding cannot take place at the exact location and date as was anticipated.
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The parish church of the bride or the groom is the ordinary place of marriage. If the couple wishes to marry in a Catholic church other than their own, they must receive permission from each of their pastors and from the pastor of the church in which they wish to marry. A couple should be aware that there may be financial charges for the use of a church other than their own. Wedding ceremonies held in chapels are discouraged, since the parish and the parish church are considered
proper for celebration of this sacrament. Couples who wish to marry in an approved chapel, however, may receive special permission for the ceremony from the Office of Canonical Services. Weddings are never permitted outdoors.
What happens if one of the parties is a Catholic, but of one of the Eastern rites of the church? The marriage may be performed in the rite of either Catholic party; however, premarital forms must be submitted to the Office of Matrimonial Concerns in time to seek permissions that might apply from the Eastern Rite Chancery.
Why does the church ask if we have a pre-nuptial agreement? Why is that the church’s business? The marriage forms ask about a prenuptial agreement because there is an underlying premise in the church’s law, that the parties to a marriage enter the marriage without condition. Marriage is to be a “partnership of the whole of life” which by its nature is for the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of children who bless the marriage. When the prenuptial agreement deals with the consequences of property ownership at the time of death, there is no canonical problem. However, when an agreement is so structured to deal entirely with the maintenance of separate property and who gets what after a divorce, this appears contrary to a partnership for the whole of life. It places into question the understanding of the permanency of marriage that the couple holds. Further, there is an inherent contradiction in planning for the divorce and the wedding in the same time frame. An acceptable reason to have a pre-nuptial agreement however might be to provide for children of previous marriages or if it is the requirement in a business partnership to protect the interests of the other business partners. Each one must be examined individually to assure the church that the couple to the agreement understand and accept the nature of marriage as binding lasting and permanent, which is for the couple’s natural life.
For more information about diocesan marriage regulations call the Office for Matrimonial Concerns at 412-456-3033.
Wedding Guide 2011
Frequently asked questions about Why does the church teach that marriage is a sacrament? Because it is sacred. Marriage is to be a union of love, and the sacraments make Christ, the author of all love, present in our midst. For this reason, marriage between two baptized persons is a sacrament. Like the other sacraments, marriage is not just for the good of individuals or the couple, but also for the community as a whole. The Old Testament prophets saw the marriage of a man and woman as a symbol of the covenant relationship between God and his people. The permanent and exclusive union between husband and wife mirrors the mutual commitment between God and his people. St. Paul’s Letter to the Ephesians says that this union is a symbol of the relationship between Christ and the church.
Do Catholics ever validly enter into non-sacramental marriages? Yes. Marriages between Catholics and nonChristians, while they may still be valid in the eyes of the church, are non-sacramental. They are still blessed by God, and with permission a priest or deacon may witness such marriages.
What is the difference between a valid and an invalid Catholic marriage? Just as individual governments have certain requirements for civil marriage (e.g., a marriage license, blood tests), the Catholic Church also has requirements before Catholics can be considered validly married in the eyes of the church. A valid Catholic marriage results from four elements: (1) the spouses are free to marry; (2) they freely exchange their consent; (3) in consenting to marry, they have the intention to marry for life, to be faithful to one another and to be open to children; and (4) their consent is given in the presence of two witnesses and before a properly authorized church minister. Exceptions to the last requirement must be approved by church authority.
marriage
Catholic must seek permission from the local bishop to marry a non-Catholic. If the person is a non-Catholic Christian, this permission is called “permission to enter into a mixed marriage.” If the person is a non-Christian, the permission is called “dispensation from
disparity of cult.” The priest or deacon helping to prepare the couple for marriage can assist with this permission process.
Why does a Catholic wedding have to take place in a church? Marriage is not just a private or family event but also a church event. For this reason, the church teaches that marriage should be celebrated in the midst of the community, like in the parish church of one of the spouses. Only See
FAQ,
on
Page 12
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If a Catholic wants to marry a nonCatholic, how can he or she ensure that the marriage is recognized by the church? In addition to meeting the criteria for a valid Catholic marriage (see previous question), the
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FAQ FROM PAGE 11 the local bishop can permit a marriage to be celebrated in another suitable place.
If a Catholic wishes to marry in a place outside a Catholic church, how can he or she be sure that the marriage is recognized by the Catholic Church as valid? The local bishop can permit a wedding to take place in another church or in another suitable place for a sufficient reason. For example, a Catholic seeks to marry a Baptist whose father is the pastor of the local Baptist church, and the father wants to officiate at the wedding. In these circumstances the bishop could permit the couple to marry in the Baptist church. The permission in these instances is called “dispensation from canonical form.� As long as the couple follows proper protocol, including having a priest or deacon present to witness the wedding, the marriage would be recognized as valid by the Catholic Church. A priest or deacon would help the couple with the requirements.
When a Catholic marries a non-Catholic, must the couple promise to raise the children in the Catholic faith?
Is it required that a wedding celebration have expensive flowers, clothes and other accompaniments?
The non-Catholic spouse does not have to promise to have the children raised Catholic. However, the Catholic spouse must promise to do all that he or she can do to have the children baptized and raised in the Catholic faith.
The Rite of Marriage makes no reference to any of these cultural elements. The focus of the couple should be on the celebration of the sacrament. Many priests and deacons repeatedly emphasize that a couple does not have to postpone celebrating the sacrament of marriage because they cannot afford such things.
How much does it cost to get married in the Catholic Church? Individual parishes regulate the stipend, or offering to the church, that is customary on the occasion of a wedding. This might also include a fee for the organist and vocalist if this See
FAQ,
on
Page 14
If two Catholics, or a Catholic and nonCatholic, are married invalidly in the eyes of the church, what should they do? They should approach a priest or deacon to resolve the situation. Bible Quiz Ad
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FAQ FROM PAGE 12 is included in the ceremony. In a situation of true financial difficulty, however, couples can come to an agreement with the pastor so that true financial hardship would never prevent a marriage from taking place.
What is a nuptial Mass and when can a couple have one? A nuptial Mass is a Mass that includes the celebration of the sacrament of marriage. It has special readings and prayers suitable to the celebration of the sacrament. The sacrament of marriage between two baptized Catholics should normally be celebrated with a nuptial Mass. If the situation warrants, and the local bishop gives permission, a nuptial Mass may be celebrated for
14 Pittsburgh Catholic
a marriage between a Catholic and a baptized person who is not a Catholic, except that Communion is not given to the non-Catholic spouse and non-Catholic guests. In such instances, it is better to use the appropriate ritual for marriage outside of Mass. The celebration of a marriage without a nuptial Mass is always the case in a marriage between a baptized Catholic and a non-baptized person.
What should a couple do when they decide that they want to marry in the Catholic Church? They should contact their parish as soon as possible and make an appointment to talk with the priest, deacon or staff person responsible for preparing couples for marriage. This must be done at least six months prior to the proposed date of the wedding. It is important that it be done before any of the arrangements for the wedding are made, e.g. renting a hall, hiring a disc jockey, etc. The priest, deacon or staff person will explain the process of marriage preparation and the various preparation programs that are available.
Why does the church require engaged couples to participate in a marriage preparation program?
You can only love something that you know, and as your knowledge increases so can your love deepen. As part of its pastoral responsibility the church requires every couple to participate in a marriage prep program in order that they will be properly ready to be married. Marriage preparation offers couples the opportunity to develop a better understanding of Christian marriage; to evaluate and deepen their readiness to live married life; and to gain insights into themselves as individuals and as a couple. It is especially effective in helping couples to deal with the challenges of the early years of marriage.
What kinds of marriage preparation programs does our local church offer? In the Diocese of Pittsburgh there are several options, and every couple is required to attend one. The diocesan pre-marriage program, consisting of four evenings, is offered at St. Mary of Mercy’s Lawless Hall every other month starting in January. Engaged Encounter Weekends are offered several times a year. Also, many parishes and clusters of parishes offer marriage preparation programs. Some parishes offer programs for groups of couples as well as a marriage-mentoring program with an experienced married couple.
Wedding Guide 2011
For further information about any of these programs, contact the Office for Adult and Family Faith Formation, 412-456-3160, or e-mail familylife@diopitt.org. As part of their preparation many couples also complete a premarital inventory, such as FOCCUS (Facilitating Open Couple Communication, Understanding and Study), to identify issues for discussion.
What key issues are covered in marriage preparation? Marriage preparation programs help couples to understand both the practical and spiritual realities of married life. Typical topics include the meaning of marriage as a sacrament; faith, prayer and the church; roles in marriage; communication and conflict resolution; children, parenthood and natural family planning; finances; and family of origin.
Is there a cost for marriage preparation programs? Most programs charge a modest fee to cover the cost of materials. Programs that require an overnight stay include an additional cost for rooms and meals. Assistance is frequently available for couples who would otherwise be unable to participate.
Does the church offer any programs to
help couples to improve their marriage? Yes. Peer ministry for married couples is widespread. Many couples participate in Marriage Encounter (www.wwme.org), which offers a weekend experience and ongoing community support. Many couples meet in parish-based small groups; ministries such as Teams of Our Lady and Christian Family Movement also use the small-group approach. Some parishes sponsor a retreat day or evening of reflection for married couples. Others
offer a mentoring system that matches older couples with younger ones. Retrouvaille offers a lifeline for troubled marriages that has proven itself effective.
kkk For information about any of these programs, call the Office for Adult and Family Faith Formation at 412-456-3160. For other helpful resources, consult the Diocese of Pittsburgh website at www. diopitt.org/education/oflc.
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Wedding &EngagemenAnnouncem
Miner-Conklin Arendash-Labyoda Caitlin Michelle Arendash and Scott Louis Labyoda were united in marriage on Saturday, May 21, 2011, at St. Sylvester Church, Brentwood. The officiant was Father John Bachkay. Following the ceremony, a reception was held at St. John’s Cathedral Center in Munhall. The bride is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Michael Arendash of Brentwood, and the groom is the son of Mr. and Mrs. Louis Labyoda, also of Brentwood. Caitlin is a graduate of Brentwood High School and is employed at Pittsburgh Catholic Publishing Associates, Inc. Scott, also a graduate of Brentwood High School, is employed with the IBEW Local Union 5. Matron of honor was Rachael Asbee and the best man was Jeff Johnson. Bridesmaids were Julie Joyce, Suzanne Kratz, Michele Capaccio and Brittany Pavlik. Junior bridesmaid was Sydney Flinn and flower girl was Laekyn Flinn. Groomsmen were Scott Dolekary, Christopher Arendash, Jason Mackey and Christopher Drevitch. Junior groomsman was Braden Flinn and ring bearer was McClain Flinn. Following a honeymoon in St. Lucia in the Caribbean, the couple is residing in Brentwood.
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John and Colleen Miner of Saranac Lake are pleased to announce the engagement of their daughter, Amanda Miner, to Seth Conklin, son of Scott and Bernadette Conklin of Valencia. Amanda is a 2005 graduate of Saranac Lake High School and a 2009 graduate of DeSales University in Center Valley, where she graduated cum laude with a bachelor’s degree in theology. She is currently employed by Rachel's Vineyard Ministries in King of Prussia. Seth is a 2006 graduate of Aquinas Academy and a 2010 graduate of DeSales University, where he graduated cum laude with a bachelor’s degree in philosophy and a minor in theology. He is currently a teacher at Regina Coeli Academy in Wyndmoor. Amanda and Seth are planning a wedding for Oct. 1, 2011, at St. Agnes Church in Lake Placid, N.Y. Photo courtesy of Paul Hameline Photography
Dentino-Mannella Gayle Dentino, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Robert Dentino of Pittsburgh’s Bloomfield neighborhood is engaged to Anthony Mannella, son of Anthony Mannella and the late Jennie Mannella of Pittsburgh’s Stanton Heights neighborhood. The couple met at the famous Bloomfield Italy Days in September 2005. The wedding is set for Sept. 10, 2011, the couple’s favorite season. The ceremony is planned for St. Joseph Church in Bloomfield, where the bride-to-be grew up and is a longtime parishioner. The reception is set for The River’s Landing in Oakmont. The couple will reside in Stanton Heights.
Colella-Aquino Rachel Colella and Justin Aquino were united in marriage on Dec. 11, 2010, at Holy Redeemer Church in Ellwood City. Officiant was Father Mark Thomas. Rachel is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Michael Colella of Beaver Falls. Justin is the son of Mr. and Mrs. Timothy Aquino of Ellwood City. After a honeymoon to the Bahamas, the couple is residing in Beaver Falls.
Wedding Guide 2011
ments
Joyce-Huber Mr. and Mrs. John Joyce of Baldwin announce the engagement of their daughter, Julie Joyce, to Ash Huber, son of Mr. and Mrs. Paul Huber of South Park Township. Julie is a fifth-grade teacher at St. Gabriel School and Ash is employed by Precision Auto Body. They will exchange wedding vows June 18, 2012.
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Rotuna-Hoffman Kathleen Mary Rotuna and James Francis Hoffman Jr. were united in marriage on March 19, 2011, at SS. Peter and Paul Church in Beaver. Father Michael Decewicz celebrated the Mass. Kathleen is the daughter of John and Kathleen Rotuna. James is the son of James and Eunice Hoffman. The bride is a graduate of Slippery Rock University. The groom is a graduate of Pennsylvania State University. Both are employed by Outstanding Seed Company, LLC.
Kristen Lynne Bogacki and Daniel Ryan Weiss were united in marriage at St. Bernadette Church in Monroeville on March 5, 2011. Parents of the couple are Dave and Kathy Bogacki of Penn Hills, Robb Weiss of Wexford and Deborah Weiss of Penn Hills. Father Edward Yuhas served as principal celebrant and homilist. Following a reception at The Lamplighter, the newlyweds honeymooned in the Poconos. Kristen and Dan now reside in Wilkins Township.
Piechowicz-Kurta Alex Kurta and Patty Piechowicz will be united in marriage on July 29, 2011. Both are Pittsburgh natives and grew up in Mon-Valley cities right next to each other. They attended Serra Catholic and McKeesport high schools, then Penn State and the University of Pittsburgh. Alex and Patty are blessed for the bond of their Catholic faith that they have shared in the past and now in the future when they become husband and wife.
Wedding Guide 2011
Takach-Thompson Melissa Takach and Michael Thompson were united in marriage on Saturday, April 30, 2011, at St. Sebatian Church in Ross Township. Father John Naugle celebrated a beautiful Easter season Mass for their wedding. Melissa is the daughter of Thomas and Arleen Takach Jr. Michael is the son of Raymond and Mary Ann Thompson.
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Sigmund-Antoline Jill Elizabeth Sigmund and Paul Thomas Antoline announce their marriage Saturday, June 4, 2011, at SS. John and Paul Church, Franklin Park. The bride is the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Paul Sigmund of New Sewickley Township. Jill is a 2009 graduate of Carlow University and a 2010 graduate of Clarion University. She is assistant director of the Robinson Township Library. The groom is the son of Mr. and Mrs. Donald Antoline of New Sewickley Township. Paul is a 2005 graduate of the University of Pittsburgh. He is the technical services librarian at the Moon Township Public Library. The couple will honeymoon in Niagara Falls and reside in Stowe Township.
Perrine-Chambers Lauren Perrine and Robert Chambers will exchange wedding vows July 15, 2011, at Our Lady Star of the Sea Catholic Church in Ponte Vedra, Fla. Lauren is a graduate of Lawton Chiles High School and Florida State University. Rob graduated from Central Catholic High School in Pittsburgh’s Oakland neighborhood and obtained his undergraduate and graduate degrees from Stetson University. Lauren, a certified public accountant, is manager of joint venture reporting at Regency Centers Corp. Rob, also a CPA, is manager of commercial finance for CEVA Logistics. A reception is planned at the TPC Sawgrass clubhouse, and the couple will reside in Jacksonville.
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Vozel-Vucic Mr. and Mrs. Charles Vozel of West Deer announce the engagement of their daughter, Rebecca Leigh, to Nicholas Vucic, son of Alan and Mary Vucic of West Deer. Rebecca graduated with a bachelor’s degree in political science from Carlow University. Nicholas graduated from Duquesne University with a master’s degree in social and public policy after completing a bachelor’s degree in political science at the University of Richmond. The wedding took place on Saturday, May 7, 2011.
20 Pittsburgh Catholic
Tokar-Palcsey Tom and Kathy Tokar of North Huntingdon and John and Jean Palcsey of Dravosburg announce the marriage of their children, Stacy Lynn and Michael, respectively. Michael and Stacy Palcsey were married on May 21, 2011, at St. Vincent Archabbey Basilica in Latrobe. Father Joseph Freedy was the main celebrant; Father Charles Baptiste concelebrated. Stacy belongs to Immaculate Conception Parish in Irwin and Michael belongs to Corpus Christi Parish in McKeesport. The couple now resides in Ben Avon.
Windstein-Kurzawski Mr. and Mrs. Bernard L. Windstein of Brentwood are happy to announce the upcoming wedding of their daughter, Sara Windstein, to Joseph Kurzawski, son of Mr. and Mrs. Albert Kurzawski of Carrick. They will be united in marriage on Saturday, Oct. 29, 2011, at St. Sylvester Church in Brentwood. Sara is a senior certified pharmacy technician at Walgreens in Upper St. Clair, and Joe is a SIMS/STL coordinator for Walgreens in Pleasant Hills. After their wedding, Joe and Sara will enjoy their honeymoon at Walt Disney World in Florida, then reside in Baldwin.
Wedding Guide 2011
Wedding Guide Look for the next
in February 2012 including
Golden Wedding Anniversaries and other special features!
Hagan-Vargo Mr. and Mrs. Arthur Hagan of Stone Mountain, Ga., are pleased to announce the engagement of their daughter, Catherine Christine Hagan, to Stephen Anthony Vargo III, son of Dr. and Mrs. Stephen Vargo Jr. of Jefferson Hills. Catherine is a 2007 graduate of Duquesne University and is employed by UPMC Centers for Rehab Services. Stephen is a 2002 graduate of Wheeling Jesuit University and is employed by The Madow Group. An October 2011 wedding in the Duquesne University Chapel is planned.
Golden Wedding Anniversary Paul and Helen Figel Kolesar celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary on Jan. 14, 2011, with family at the LeMont in Pittsburgh’s Mount Washington neighborhood. They were married at the former St. Veronica Church, now part of Good Samaritan Parish in Ambridge, and are members of St. James Parish in Sewickley. Both retired from the Corps of Engineers in Pittsburgh and presently reside in Sewickley. They are the proud parents of Helen Marsh and husband Fred of Laurel, Md.; Paul Kolesar and wife Jennifer of Mooresville, N.C.; and Michael Kolesar and wife Rebecca of Sewickley. They are proud grandparents of Breanna, Austin, Matthew, Justin, Sean, Gabrielle and Isabella.
Couples observing Golden Wedding Anniversaries in 2011 and 2012, share your joyful announcement with the rest of the Diocese of Pittsburgh in the Pittsburgh Catholic full-color Wedding Guide to be released in February 2012!
Pegher-Tanouye Julie Marie Pegher and Shane Michael Tanouye were united in marriage on May 28, 2010, at Heinz Memorial Chapel on the campus of the University of Pittsburgh. Julie is the daughter of David and Rachael Pegher. Shane is the son of Calvin Tanouye and Della Brockman. The bride is a mechanical engineer employed at the Beaver Valley Nuclear Power Station. The groom is active - duty Army serving with the National Guard.
Wedding Guide 2011
Send your color photograph and 110 words (see sample above) postmarked on or before Friday, January 6, 2012, to: Wedding Guide 2012 Pittsburgh Catholic 135 First Avenue, Suite 200 Pittsburgh, PA 15222-1513 or e-mail clabyoda@pittsburghcatholic.org. Hard-copy photos will be returned to those providing a selfaddressed stamped envelope.
Pittsburgh Catholic 21
Wedding Word Search W R G R S D I H E A A R E A H U N H G D N B K T A R F U F Q I A P I V L M I B L M A I D O F H O N O R ❤ A M G O J T P D S Y G A W I I O U W A H D E B B M D D L R O R E N E E W O T I E Y X T R E R A R A X S M S Y P I G R G F M N E M M ❤ H W S R K E E D I R B B F A Y F H R U X L G R O X Y I N E M S M O O R G L K M D ❤ N D Y T M O T H E R S A T BESTMAN FAMILY FRIENDS MAIDOFHONOR RINGBEARER
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22 Pittsburgh Catholic
Wedding Guide 2011
Wedding Guide 2011
Pittsburgh Catholic 23
Blinded by
y b s e l y t S
e n i t s i r h C n a us
S
By TRACY BECKER
Congratulations! You’ve made a big decision in your life and in the life of the church. You may be overwhelmed at the amount of work that must be done. With a little research and organization, you can have the wedding of your dreams without a loan that you’ll be paying off at your 50th wedding anniversary. Think of it this way: the only necessary thing is the nuptial Mass and pre-Cana classes; everything else is extra. Set your budget before you shop. Don’t be taken in by a moment in time’s artificial bling; go for the life-long substance of the sacrament. Given that, let’s look at what those extras are.
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Of course you want all your family and friends to share in your sacrament. These days people send “Save the Date” notices or engagement cards in advance, and, of course, there’s the actual invitation and thank you cards. These range in cost and style. If you are savvy enough, print your own at home or send them via the Internet. Try using a holy card with a prayer as a save-the-date notice so all those who receive it will be praying for you while you prepare. Also, limit your list. For people who you
Wedding Guide 2011
know will not be able to attend, send an announcement instead. Another innovative idea is to send large postcards with a detachable response card. It will save you postage because you will use a 44-cent stamp and a 28-cent stamp instead of two 44-cent stamps. The savings add up!
Bridal gown and other clothing Don’t spend all your money on the dress. If you hunt around, you will find affordable dresses that fit any budget. Don’t skimp on modesty. “Let your modesty be known to all men. The Lord is nigh” (Philippians 4:5). If you know how to sew, you will be able to alter a dress to your taste. Tuxedos are not necessary; a nice suit will do just as well. Bridesmaid dresses sometimes cost less than a nice Sunday dress. See if the store where you’ll buy your bridal gown will offer a discount on the other dresses. You can even borrow a dress or wear your mother’s.
Flowers
Make sure the flowers you would like are in season. Also, flowers do not need to be everywhere, i.e. the bathroom, changing rooms, etc. If you would like your bridal party to have flowers, try silk instead or use corsages instead of bouquets. The bridal bouquet does not need to be as tall as you are. Remember, the more flowers you add, the heavier it will be. Also make the throwaway bouquet (if you need one) silk. I would suggest real flowers for the Marian altar. Having your wedding Mass during the Christmas (not Advent) or Easter (not Lent) season saves money because the flowers are already in place.
Wedding Guide 2011
Music
You have two types to think about. First, let’s look at the liturgical hymns. You don’t need a full choir or a whole symphony. An organ player and maybe a cantor (someone to lead the singing) are all you need. Of course, search for talent in your family and friends. Also, more and more parishes are not allowing the “Wedding March.” (See accompanying article for other options.) Using Gregorian chant a few minutes before Mass sets the mood as sacred and quiets the guests. For the reception music, again I stress — a whole orchestra is not needed. Do your research with bands and disc jockeys. Or have cousin Sam randomly play your favorite CDs. If your reception is outside, birds, trickling water, etc. are all excellent backgrounds (and no one will have to yell over it to talk to each other).
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Reception If you would like a reception, use the church hall. Also, check out the restaurants advertised in this Wedding Guide, the Pittsburgh Catholic or on the back of your parish bulletin — they may offer discounts. After Mass, you could send everyone back to their hotel or house to change and meet again in a park or back yard. Do all the decorating yourself or have the bridal party complete the task. Shop the dollar and party supply stores. You’ll be amazed at what you’ll find! Or perhaps donate the money that would have been for wedding gifts and a grand reception to your favorite charity and have a potluck instead. Remember — in or out of church, you are Catholic. The music and dancing should reflect this.
A horse-drawn carriage or limousine is a big extra. Carpool wherever possible.
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Pittsburgh Catholic 25
BLING FROM PAGE 25
Food
Instead of five-course meals, perhaps cake and ice cream. If dinner is served, cut down on the choices — two choices of meat instead of four, etc.
Photos Almost every family has a photographer. If you happen to be marrying the family photographer, he or she probably has friends who could use the money but would give you a discount. A word of caution
if you are thinking of placing cameras on tables at the reception — many photos will not develop correctly due to lighting and other issues. Children tend to take pictures of themselves, and if the reception is outside there may be lighting issues.
Honeymoon Do you need one? Can you afford one? If you can, try places in the United States instead of trying to find the most exotic place on earth. As with the reception, you can donate the proceeds to a worthy cause instead of a trip. Or make your honeymoon a humanitarian trip. Help those in Haiti or other countries. Volunteers are always needed.
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26 Pittsburgh Catholic
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Mass
As stated above, try planning a wedding date around Christmas and Easter so you can use the decorations already there. Save money by using one or two members of your churchâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s choir instead of hiring the whole choir (although there will still be a fee). Pew decorations, outside decorations, red carpet runners, flower petals down the aisle, etc. are all extras. Your guests are coming to celebrate the sacrament of matrimony with you and your fiancĂŠ in holy Mass. The pew bows wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even be remembered.
Misc. Gifts for the bridal party, church decorations, reception decorations, etc. can all be made or purchased at a low cost. Try hunting antique shops, party stores or fairs for that unique gift. Be thoughtful about what your gifts will be. An engraved money clip, for example, is not a great gift for someone who loses things easily or prefers a wallet. As you plan, remember that your example as Catholics and in the wedding you plan is a nonverbal profession of your faith. Someone sitting in a pew may be converted by the example that you, your fiancĂŠ and your bridal party convey. Be choosy in your selection of a bridal party and every other element of your wedding Mass. Again, congratulations on your upcoming sacrament! Becker is the author of â&#x20AC;&#x153;A Catholic Brideâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Wedding Planner,â&#x20AC;? available at local Catholic bookstores, Amazon.com and www.foryourmarriage.org under engagement resources.
Wedding Guide 2011
Things couples say they overspent on: dress, food, honeymoon. Remember — every dollar saved could be applied toward a home, retirement fund, etc. Look for deals in this Wedding Guide, the Pittsburgh Catholic or the back of your parish bulletin. Sometimes businesses offer a discount for mentioning the ad, and you would be supporting your fellow parishioners’ businesses. Places to find modest (and alluring) dresses: ❦ www.eternitygowns.com ❦ www.totallymodest.com (1-800-770-6966 or 435-688-1777, Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Mountain Standard Time) ❦ www.beautifullymodest.com (1-888-622-6997, Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-7 p.m. and Saturday 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Mountain Standard Time) ❦ www.vintagewedding.com (1-800-660-3640) ❦ www.simplyelegantforyou.com (many locations)
Flowers — so many varieties! Try a combination of these: Sunflower: Faith Peony: Love of God Rose: Love of our neighbor Carnation: Obedience Forget-me-not: Piety Violet: Humility Daffodil: Industry Narcissus: Truthfulness Lily: Chastity Ivy: Hope
for the bride to leave her bouquet (or a small symbolic bouquet) at the statue of Our Lady. Since this takes place after the Mass, any sacred Marian antiphon, motet or hymn will suffice. Some possibilities are an “Ave Maria,” “Salve Regina” or “On This Day, O Beautiful Mother,” Carroll said.
Taken from “The Catholic Girl’s Guide” by Father Francis Xavier Lasance
Music: Try a version of “Ave Maria” instead. Many composers have written beautiful music to this, such as Bach. Lucy Carroll, noted writer on Catholic liturgical music, suggests the Purcell “Trumpet Tune,” “Trumpet Voluntary in D,” Pachelbel “Canon,” “The Grand March” by Alexandre Guilmant or a host of others. “In many churches, it is still permitted
Choose the month of your wedding by your favorite devotion in your spiritual life as a couple: January: Holy Infancy (Holy Name) February: Holy Trinity/Holy Family (Passion of our Lord) March: St. Joseph April: Holy Spirit/Passion for Lent (Eucharist) May: Blessed Virgin Mary June: Blessed Sacrament/Sacred Heart of Jesus July: Precious Blood of Jesus August: Most Pure Heart of Mary September: Holy Cross (Our Lady of Sorrows) October: Holy Angels/Holy Rosary November: Holy Souls in purgatory December: Immaculate Conception (Divine Infancy)
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Choice of Two (2) Augratin Potatoes Scalloped Potatoes Parsley Potatoes
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Pittsburgh Catholic 27
Area parish Pre-Cana schedule AUGUST 2011
Cost: $50 per couple Registration/information: 412-494-0354
Parish sponsor: St. Joseph, Coraopolis Location: 1301 Fourth Ave., Coraopolis, Pa. 15108 Date and time: Saturday, Aug. 27, 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. Cost: $75 Registration/information: 412-264-6162
Parish sponsor: St. Catherine of Sweden, Wildwood Location: 2554 Wildwood Road, Wildwood, Pa. 15091 Dates and time: Two Sunday sessions, Sept. 25 and Oct. 2, 1-5 p.m. Cost: $50 Registration/information: 412-486-6001
SEPTEMBER 2011
Parish sponsor: St. Margaret of Scotland, Green Tree Location: 310 Mansfield Ave., Pittsburgh, Pa. 15220 Date and time: Saturday, Sept. 17
OCTOBER 2011
Parish sponsor: St. Bernard, Mount Lebanon Location:
311 Washington Road, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15216 Dates and time: Four sessions, Wednesdays and Fridays, Oct. 5, 7, 12 and 14, 7-9:30 p.m. Cost: $40 Registration/information: 412-561-3300 Parish sponsor: Immaculate Conception, Washington Location: 119 W. Chestnut St., Washington, Pa. 15301 Dates and times: Two days, Friday, Oct. 14, 6:30-9 p.m. and Saturday, Oct. 15, 8:30 a.m.-3:30 p.m. Cost: $40 Registration/information: Sister Margaretta at 724-225-1425 Parish sponsor: Butler County parishes Location: St. Peter Parish Center, 342 Normal Ave., Slippery Rock, Pa. 16057 Dates and time: Two sessions, Saturdays, Oct. 15 and 22, 10:45 a.m.-5 p.m., followed by Mass at 5:30 p.m. Cost: $40 per couple, with lunch provided, or bring your own. Class limited to 20 couples. Early registration suggested. Registration/information: 724-991-2639
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Parish sponsor: St. Basil, Carrick Location: 1735 Brownsville Road, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15210 Dates and times: Two days, Friday, 7-10 p.m. and resume on Saturday, 9 a.m.-3 p.m. (dates to be announced) Cost: $60 Registration/information: 412-882-9763
NOVEMBER 2011
Parish sponsor: St. Sebastian, Ross Township Location: Martina Spiritual Renewal Center, 5244 Clarwin Ave., Pittsburgh, Pa. 15229 Dates and time: Two days, Friday-Saturday, Nov. 11-12 (time to be announced) Cost: $125-$150 per couple Registration/information: 412-364-8999 Parish sponsor: Our Lady of Peace, Conway Location: 1000 Third Ave., Conway, Pa. 15027 Dates and times: Two days, Friday, Nov. 18, 6-9 p.m. and Saturday, Nov. 19, 9 a.m.-2 p.m.
Wedding Guide 2011
Cost: $25 per couple Registration/information: Katie Weikert at 724-869-4723 Parish sponsor: St. Benedict the Abbot, Peters Township Location: 120 Abington Drive, McMurray, Pa. 15317 Date and time: To be announced Cost: $25 Registration/information: 724-941-4230
JANUARY 2012
Parish sponsor: St. Camillus, Neshannock Township Location: 314 W. Englewood Ave., New Castle, Pa. 16105 Dates and time: Three sessions, Monday, Jan 9, Wednesday, Jan. 11, and Friday, Jan. 13, 7-10 p.m. Title: A Journey of a Lifetime Cost: $35 per couple, for materials. Registration/information: Sister Barbara Ann Johnston at 724-652-9471 Parish sponsor: St. Joseph, Coraopolis
Cost: $50 Registration/information: 412-486-6001
Location: 1301 Fourth Ave., Coraopolis, Pa. 15108 Date and time: Saturday, Jan. 28, 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. Cost: $100 Registration/information: 412-264-6162
Parish sponsor: St. Elizabeth of Hungary, Pleasant Hills Location: One Grove Place, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15236 Dates and time: Four classes, Sunday, Feb. 26, Tuesday, Feb. 28, Thursday, March 1, and Sunday, March 4, 7-9:30 p.m. Cost: $60 Registration/information: 412-882-8744 Parish sponsor: St. Benedict the Abbot, Peters Township Location: 120 Abington Drive, McMurray, Pa. 15317 Date and time: To be announced Cost: $25 Registration/information: 724-941-4230
Parish sponsor: St. Louise de Marillac, Upper St. Clair Location: 320 McMurray Road, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15241 Date and time: January or February (dates and times to be announced) Registration/information: 412-833-1010, or visit http://home. catholicweb.com/stlouisedemarillac
MARCH 2012
FEBRUARY 2012
Parish sponsor: St. Anne, Castle Shannon Location: 400 Hoodridge Drive, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15234 Dates and times: Two days, Friday, March 2, 7-10 p.m. and Saturday, March 3, 9 a.m.-3:30 p.m.
Parish sponsor: St. Catherine of Sweden, Hampton Township Location: 2554 Wildwood Road, Wildwood, Pa. 15091 Dates and time: Two days, Sundays, Feb. 5 and 12, 1-5 p.m.
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Wedding Guide 2011
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Wedding Guide 2011
A peek at weddings m e h e l h t e B C a m e r o o n
Indonesia
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Pittsburgh Catholic 31
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Wedding Guide 2011
CLASSES FROM PAGE 29 Cost: $50 per couple Registration/information: 412-531-5964 Parish sponsor: St. Mary of the Assumption, Glenshaw Location: 2510 Middle Road, Glenshaw, Pa. 15116 Date and time: Saturday, March 10, 8:30 a.m.-4 p.m. Cost: $50 per couple Registration/information: James Finn at 412-486-4100, ext. 203 Parish sponsor: St. Hugh, Carmichaels Location: 408 Route 88, Carmichaels, Pa. 15320 Date and time: Saturday, March 24, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Cost: $20 Registration/information: 724-966-7270
Parish sponsor: Butler County parishes Location: St. Peter Parish Center, 342 Normal Ave., Slippery Rock, Pa. 16057 Dates and time: Two sessions, Saturday, April 21 and 28, 10:45 a.m.-5 p.m., followed by Mass at 5:30 p.m. Cost: $40 per couple, with lunch provided, or can be brown-bagged. Class limited to 20 couples, so register early. Registration/information: 724-991-2639 Parish sponsor: St. Joseph, Coraopolis Location: 1301 Fourth Ave., Coraopolis, Pa. 15108 Date and time: Saturday, April 28, 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. Cost: $100 Registration/information: 412-264-6162
JUNE 2012
Parish sponsor: St. Benedict the Abbot, Peters Township Location: 120 Abington Drive, McMurray, Pa. 15317 Date and time: To be announced Cost: $25 Registration/information: 724-941-4230
DATES TO BE ANNOUNCED
Parish sponsor: St. Maurice, Forest Hills Location: 2001 Ardmore Blvd., Pittsburgh, Pa. 15221 Registration/information: 412-471-0809
V
Parish sponsor: St. Sebastian, Ross Township Location: Martina Spiritual Renewal Center, 5244 Clarwin Ave., Pittsburgh, Pa. 15229 Date and time: Two days, Friday-Saturday, Nov. 30-31 (time to be announced) Cost: $125-$150 per couple Registration/information: 412-364-8999 Parish sponsor: St. Basil, Carrick Location: 1735 Brownsville Road, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15210 Date and time: Two days, Friday, 7-10 p.m. and Saturday, 9 a.m.-3 p.m. (dates to be announced) Cost: $60 Registration/information: 412-882-9763 Parish sponsor: Our Lady of Grace, Scott Township Location: 310 Kane Blvd., Pittsburgh, Pa. 15243 Date and time: To be announced Cost: Good-will offering accepted Registration/information: 412-279-7070 or 412-279-7071
APRIL 2012
Parish sponsor: St. Bernard, Mount Lebanon Location: 411 Washington Road, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15216 Dates and time: Four sessions, Wednesdays and Fridays, April 18, 20, 25 and 27, 7-9:30 p.m. Cost: $40 Registration/information: 412-561-3300
Wedding Guide 2011
Pittsburgh Catholic 33
Diocesan Pre-Marriage Program Location Lawless Hall of St. Mary of Mercy Parish, 107 Boulevard of the Allies, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15222 (Downtown Pittsburgh). Time 7-9:30 p.m. (doors open at 6:30 p.m.) Information/registration Couples must pre-register by mail, at least one week prior to the beginning of class. Class size is limited to 60 couples and are registered on a first come, first serve basis. No walk-ins admitted. Call 412-456-3114, or visit www.diopitt.org. Couples should obtain the registration form from the priest who will officiate at their wedding, or print the form from the diocesan website and take to the priest for his signature. Complete the form and mail it, along with a $60 check made payable to “Diocese of Pittsburgh,” to Department for Religious Education, 111 Boulevard of the Allies, Pittsburgh, Pa. 15222. Schedule Sessions run once a week for four weeks on two separate days of the week. If participants cannot attend one session during a particular week, they may attend the other session offered that week.
July 2011 • Tuesdays, July 5, 12, 19 and 26 • Thursdays, July 7, 14, 21 and 28
September 2011 • Tuesdays, Sept. 6, 13, 20 and 27 • Thursdays, Sept. 8, 15, 22 and 29
November 2011 • Mondays, Nov. 7, 14, 21 and 28 • Tuesdays, Nov. 8, 15, 22 and 29
January 2012 • Tuesdays, Jan. 10, 17, 24 and 31 • Thursdays, Jan. 12, 19, 26 and Feb. 2
March 2012 • Tuesdays, March 6, 13, 20 and 27 • Thursdays, March 8, 15, 22 and 29
May 2012 • Tuesdays, May 1, 8 and 15 • Thursdays, May 3, 10 • Wednesday, May 16
July 2012 • Tuesdays, July 10, 17, 24 and 31 • Thursdays, Thursday, July 12, 19, 26 and Aug. 2
September 2012 • Tuesdays, Sept. 4, 11, 18 • Monday, Sept. 24 • Thursdays, Sept. 6, 13, 20 and 27
November 2012 • Mondays, Nov. 5, 12, 19 and 26
34 Pittsburgh Catholic
Wedding Guide 2011
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