In the Game (Nov/Dec 2017)

Over the past few years, I have been privileged to travel to every Canadian province and have noticed a similar trend in almost every hotel; the halls echo with the sounds of young hockey players gearing up for their turn to play.

I love it, because it brings back memories of my three sons’ involvement in sports as they grew from boys to teens to young adults. I rejoiced over them when they won and supported them when they lost; parents inspired me as they cheered their kids on, and I was equally amazed at the level of crazy they could go to when they were disappointed.

Athletics has a unique way of bringing out the best and the worst in people.

Sports have become one of the primary focuses of modern western life. We play games, watch our favorite teams and participate in fantasy leagues. We spend an enormous amount of money, time and emotional energy to build social lives around our favorite athletic competition.

Most of you reading this can see an almost irrational connection to sports in your heart that calls to you and longs for your attention.

So how do we as men harness the power of competition without letting it get out of control?

CULTIVATE COMPETITIVE THINK

One of the reasons we are strongly attracted to athleticsis because we were designed this way. Life is an intensepursuit, so God equipped us to think competitively.Christian living, at its core, is a competitive pursuit. In 1Corinthians 9 and again in 2 Timothy 2, the apostle Paulcompares the Christian life to three competitive pursuitson earth:

• We are soldiers (1 Corinthians 9:7; 2 Timothy 2:3) who compete against declared enemies to maintain freedom.

• We are farmers (1 Corinthians 9:7; 2 Timothy 2:6) who compete against the elements to yield a harvest.

• We are athletes (1 Corinthians 9:24-27; 2 Timothy 2:5) who compete against others to win a prize.

Even the results of our relationship with Christ are described in competitive terms.

• We are more than conquerors, (Romans 8:37)

• Death has been swallowed up in victory, (1 Corinthians 15:54)

• We have overcome the world, (John 16:33)

• We have overcome the evil one, (1 John 2:13)

The conclusion is obvious. Our faith has a highlycompetitive side to it, so learning to compete withintegrity is part of becoming a disciple of Christ. We arecalled to “contend for the faith,” (Jude 3) “fight the goodfight of the faith,” (1 Timothy 6:12) “overcome evil withgood” (Romans 12:21) and “run in such a way as to get theprize.” (1 Corinthians 9:24)

BUILD A COMPETITIVE LINK

Taking a competitive approach to life will make us stronger. A friend of mine describes athletics as “life sped up.” He says that everything you face in life, you will face in the midst of athletic competition, but you will face it faster.

In other words, there is a link between challenging pursuits and attractive character.

One of the best ways to develop self-discipline, perseverance and other vital life skills is to be involved in some competitive pursuit. It forces us to know ourselves better and work out the habits that hold us back. It equips us to identify our strengths and intentionally develop them. It trains us to work with others, overcome adversity, capitalize on victories, and maximize defeats.

The apostle Paul again talks in athletic terms in Romans 5:3-4 when he says, “we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”

This is how athletes talk! They voluntarily put themselves through suffering, which we call working out, practicing, strength training and conditioning, in order to gain the benefits. In similar fashion, believers volunteer to suffer through service, sacrifice, study and seek after God’s will in order to be a part of God’s team here on earth. Consider some of the vital life skills we learn from competitive pursuits:

• We all have different talent levels. My kids were all talented in sports, but none of them were good enough to play at the highest levels. They worked hard enough to get there, but they had to humbly accept that they were not physically gifted with elite skills.

• We must work hard to earn a place on the field. My youngest son spent weeks during his junior year in high school telling me, “I am going to play college football.” At the same time, he was spending a lot of time playing video games and eating snack foods. In my opinion, he had the ability to play at the small college level, but he wasn’t working hard enough to get there. After giving him weeks to figure it out, I finally said to him, “Caleb, I believe you have enough talent to play at the college level but you will never get there with the effort you are putting in. You either need to start working harder, or you need to stop talking about playing at the next level.”

To make a long story short, he got focused and played four years at the Division II level, even getting to the playoffs during his senior year. He discovered that opportunities come to those who work at it.

• You are only as strong as the team around you. My sons have enjoyed success and agonized over losing seasons. On each team they were a part of, they were the same young men. They were just as talented during the winning years as they were during the losing years. The difference was in the chemistry and commitment of the team.

• Athletes need coaches. My kids never played on a team that didn’t have a coach! Coaches coordinate the talent of the competitors and can see the areas that need improvement easier than those who are in the arena. This is one of the reasons churches are so important. When you sit under the leadership of a dedicated Bible teacher and gather with other “players” to implement the truth you are being taught, growth happens and influence spreads.

• Perform under stress. Competition by its nature is stressful. You are trying to highly achieve while an opponent tries to prevent you from reaching your goals. You have to outlast obstacles, execute in the face of adversity, and adjust to unexpected circumstances.

• Humility. Competition exposes our weaknesses. One year while I was playing high school basketball, I missed nine breakaway layups in a row over the course of seven games. I made “spectacular” steals that made the breakaway possible, only to embarrass myself by missing the uncontested and easiest shot on the court. There was no explanation or excuse that rescued me from being really bad at layups for a period of time.

• Dealing with disappointment. No game ever goes exactly according to plan. We face surprises, mishaps, injuries, mistakes and unexplained outcomes. Sometimes the best team loses, and sometimes the unexpected team wins. These disappointments can affect your attitude, your faith, your well-being, and your willingness to try again.

• Prepare before you play. Every coach wants to take advantage of his players’ talent, but no coach is going to play athletes who are not prepared. Combatants who have not trained, practiced and studied don’t get an opportunity to compete in the game. When they apply themselves ahead of time, however, they gain the full confidence of the coach and get to enjoy the full experience of competing.

AVOID THE COMPETITIVE STINK

There is a danger, of course, in taking a competitive approach to life. Winning can dominate your thinking ,destroy relationships, and drown the rest of your life with offensive odours.

When I was playing football in high school, we wore half-shirts underneath our shoulder pads to prevent getting rubbed raw by the straps. At the beginning of each season, we would wear those shirts without washing them as long as we could just to prove we were tough. The shirts would absorb sweat, accumulating salt and other minerals day after day. The outcome we were looking for was to see if the shirt could stand up on its own. By the time we accomplished that goal, the shirts smelled terrible. We put up with it because we thought it was worthwhile. Anybody else in our life would have thought it was offensive, repulsive and foolish. The athletic pursuit was good, but it was tainted by a silly (and smelly) goal.

This is what happens when competition gets out of balance. We think what we are doing is awesome and important. The other people in our lives see it as silly, belligerent and disgusting. What they used to love in our lives now leaves them empty and lonely.

We have probably all seen it.

• A dad yelling at his pre-adolescent son who is not performing up to his expectations.

• A man spends so much time researching his fantasy league he misses family activities and church commitments.

• A man who loves Jesus ruins his testimony at an adult sports league with uncontrolled anger, pervasive swearing or unwarranted evaluations of his teammates.

• A parent creates a contentious relationship with his child’s coach because he believes his daughter is being slighted, overlooked or singled out.

• A man is so expressive in his home watching a sportingevent that no one wants to spend time with him.

In all these instances, a man’s connection to sports isolates him from the people he loves.

So let’s learn to embrace competition and contend wisely with all our heart. 1 Corinthians 10:31 challenges all of us, “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” As I understand it, competing is part of “whatever you do,” so let’s Cultivate Competitive Think, Embrace the Competitive Link and Avoid Competitive Stink so God might be glorified in our most passionate pursuits.

/ BILL FARREL challenges people to be adventurous individuals of integrity. He has served as a youth pastor, senior pastor and most recently as the small group pastor for Dr. David Jeremiah. He is a frequent speaker at men’s events including Promise Keepers Canada and Iron Sharpens Iron events. He is also the author of The 10 Best Decisions a Man Can Make, 7 Simple Skills for Every Man, Men Are Like Waffles—Women Are Like Spaghetti, Red-Hot Monogamy and the Her Best Friend app for husbands.