10 minute read
Classifieds
FICTION
NewFiction By Jeanpaul Ferro
t 26 Jack felt an enormous power in himself. He was fit and muscular, and after three months on the Dead River the sun had brought out the roots of his hair blond. He had to ignore the women there, though. The ones who'd hide behind the fir and watch as he hung the wet suits. The way they'd touch his arm when they set themselves down in the raft. The way their eyes would turn nervous, their lips hard, the untrained love they had nowhere to put but in themselves. They came for the weekend from big New England cities like Boston, Providence, and New London, all the way up to Jackman, usually with their boyfriends, those fair tempered temporarytype boyfriends some girls had. Stepping stones. Even some of the husbands were stepping stones.
Three months. That's how long Jack had been there. Three months on the Dead and Kennebec and Penobscot. Three months on old school buses, driving throu~h sylvan tracts of cut spruce and hemlock and white pine to get down to the rivers. Three months of listening to people who were a lot like Jack had been. Undefeated. Callow. Steady. But being in Jackman, a guide on rivers instead of on soft blue computer terminals, made Jack look at people in a different light. "Jack! Iwant to sit back by you!" she said as she climbed into the raft.
Jack looked back at her husband. He laughed up on the big rock about something with the man from Syracuse. "He doesn't care," Jack heard the woman say behind him.
He turned and looked at her at the back of the raft. She stood there in her blue and yellow wet suit perfectly defeated. She was blonde and thin and gaunt and terribly flat· chested. But there was something about her. She was a first child like Jack, he could sense it. It was in her eyes, the pain. A furious depth opened to pools of emptiness. Jack had seen it the minute she walked up to him in the lodge and introduced herself as Kate Lethem. Her eyes were set back and were the same color as the Kennebec, blue like when the river flattened out around the corner and caught the last light of the sky on its surface. It unnerved him. Women usually didn't unnerve Jack Watson.
He helped the husband and the man from Syracuse into the raft and then the six happy college kids up from Northeastern. It was dark and gray that morning, cold when Jack put on his wet suit in the tent.
Jack took a deep breath, untied the raft from shore, and pushed off, straightened out, and maneuvered
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The man looked back. "Sorry. Sorry." uickly, the raft moved onto the rapids and Jack shouted commands he'd taught his novice crew back at the lodge. They moved through· the granite canyon and out into the open river. Some days the wind would come in from the north and Jack would smell the
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bitter decay of the paper mill up in the hills. But that morning the mist and clouds blunted the smell from coming down.
The woman, Kate, kept looking back. The rapids grew larger and more powerful and everyone smiled nervously like at a great play or on a roller coaster. Jack shouted more commands as the water broke and crashed over them. He tured straight on, right for the big twelve-foot rapid. He knew he had to hit it straight or risk twisting over. "Go! Go!" he shouted. They hit the wall and sunk down into the blackish-white gulch and then up the other side. Jack felt the wave in his stomach. "Great! Great!" he yelled to them. "That was great. Perfect! Oh, that was perfect!"
They drifted away down river, passing some other raft companies near the waterfall where the Kennebec turned flat. Jack tried to ignore the woman. She kept trying to talk to him, but it was mean,
I- FIe T I ON -I
defensive, and he didn't say anything to her.
Jack went ahead for an hour and then he put them on shore and took the passengers for a walk through the woods to get their legs back, passing out some trail mixhe had put together the night before-Chex cereal, raisins, walnuts, M&M's, pecans, popcorn.
The man fromSYracusewas flush and sweaty and he took more than a handful. The woman trailed behind everyone else. Jack saw her hair matted downand wet and she had color inher cheeks now. "What a job you have," she said to him as everyone drifted ahead ofthem. "I'ddie to have your job." "Iknow,"he said."Lastyear 1was ina windowless room writing RPG for Fidelity right in Boston." He saw her turn and lookat him. "My dad;s dream," he said, smiling. "Not mine. That's why 1 came here." "Oh," she said and nodded. "I know.1do accounting." he stopped and the group. ahead of them turned the comer. Jack bumped into the woman and she turned and looked up at him. Her mouth , was gentle and trembling and her eyes stared up at Jacklikeshe had always known him. Hepretended itwas a mistake and tried to walk around her. "Don't you believe in fate?" she said, her voice shaking now.
She reached for Jack and took ,his hand. Hecould feelher shivering. "No,"Jack said very nervously. "I don't. NotanYmore." "Please?" she said. "I've never... Allmy life-"
Jack pulled away from her, a wet linden branch brushing his cheek as he moved back. He trembled and tried not to look at her. He looked ahead for the group but they were gone. "What are we going to do?" she said. "Whatare we goingto do?"
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"We're not going to do anything," he whispered in a calm, peaceful voice. "For God's sake, what can we do?"
Jack dropped the bag of trail mix and slumped down to the ground. His face fell into his hands as the wind picked up and the mist and water dripped down from the canopy of leaves and needles above them. The woman knelt down to the ground beside Jack and she tried to put her arms. around him but he pushed her back. She leaned into him and forced her mouth up against his neck. But it was only for a second, and then they heard the voices of the husband and the man from Syracuse and the six happy college kids from Northeastern coming back down toward them.
Jack looked at her, jumped up, cleared his throat. She stood up with her hand over her mouth. 'There were tears in her eyes. "There they are!" the husband shouted to the man from Syracuse. "Come on! We found another waterfall," one of the college kids shouted. "It's so beautiful." . "We'll be right there," Jack said. "We're coming." e started to walk toward them and the woman followed behind. Jack followed the trail he knew now and he watched the sky through the trees and saw some holes of blue opening up and then the slight smell of the paper mill that began. to come up in the air. He saw the waterfall up ahead and stopped with the woman just before the end of the trail.
She trembled as she leaned against Jack and he kissed her on the forehead. He heard everyone shout for them again and Jack and the woman let go of one other and slowly, deliberately, they walked over to the others, where they Ooh-ed and Aah-ed with everyone else in front of the waterfall. •
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