An Outside Look at HIV and Alphonso King Jr.

An Editorial by Zoe Faber

During my time working with Alphonso, POZ-TO/POZPLANET Magazine and the Queer and Trans Research Lab, I’ve learned so much. I’ve learned about the importance of community, history, and about living queer and proud. I am so grateful for my time at the Queer and Trans Research Lab and my time working with Alphonso. Before I worked with him and the Queer and Trans Research Lab, I felt rather isolated from queer history and community. This has changed since working with him and with the HIV positive community. Learning about the struggles and triumphs of the HIV positive community and about Alphonso’s personal life, I feel that I’ve gained so much knowledge and a renewed appreciation for queer strength.

Something that has too often been stolen from queer people is intergenerational learning. So many of our elders have been lost due to the AIDS epidemic. I personally did not grow up with queer elders and really only started meeting many queer people when I moved to Toronto. Meeting Alphonso and learning about the queer community through him has been so powerful. I am particularly grateful that Alphonso is here because he brings a piece of history with him that would otherwise have been lost. I’m so glad he’s imparted even a fraction of that knowledge and history onto me.

Something I’ve gathered from learning about the HIV positive community is the power of resilience. Through Alphonso’s work in the HIV community, he’s been able to uplift others for the work they do and the lives they lead. This is perfectly exemplified in the stories told in the POZPLANET magazine. Learning about women with HIV as Deborah Norris describes her story was so powerful. Her story of being diagnosed while trying to care for her children was incredibly heart wrenching. The issues she’s since brought up facing women with HIV is so important, and I’m so glad she’s speaking out. Similarly, I was really interested to read Bob Lahey’s descriptions of what it’s like to grow old with HIV when no one was expected to survive. Every article that I’ve read, every interview has opened my eyes to new aspects and perspectives on the HIV positive community. I’m so glad that this magazine exists, and that people are able to tell their stories.

One of my biggest lessons I got from working with Alphonso is the power of community. Queer people are so often subject to isolation and shame. I personally found it incredibly hard to find queer community and to be out and proud before I moved to Toronto. This is why I believe Alphonso’s Mingle events are crucial. Being able to have a physical gathering space to be able to be open about one’s queerness and HIV status is so important. Having been able to attend the Mingle events, I feel incredibly honoured to be around the different organizations that Alphonso spotlights, and to meet the people that are involved. Before I started working with Alphonso, I didn’t think about the world and dedication it took to organize for social causes much, especially when the cause faces so much stigma.

Through the mingle events, Alphonso has always imparted to me the importance of being out and proud about HIV to decrease stigma. I think this applies to every aspect of life. Do what you do proudly. Because of my time working with Alphonso and the Queer and Trans Research Lab, I have learned so much about the importance of queerness, of pride, and of the HIV positive community. I am so glad I got the opportunity to work with Alphonso and to learn more about the HIV positive community, the queer community, and myself.

EDITOR’S NOTE: When I got the email that I had been chosen to be a resident for the Queer & Trans Research Lab at the University of Toronto, I couldn’t believe it. I had spent a lot time back in 2022 complaining that there was no mentoring happening in the LGBT Community. And I guess the universe heard me and gave this opportunity. As a Community Organizer and HIV Activist I have done many speaking engagements but having a space where I could hopefully help get young people interested in giving back to their community and realize that the future of our community depends on their participation is essential.

So, it has been my pleasure to work with Zoe and to call them a new friend. The thing that has been great about this time has been learning from them about what college students and gender fluid people experience these days. I still stumble on the correct pronouns every now and then. But Zoe has never gotten upset with me for a slip up. I’m 55 and I’ve lived several lifetimes. So, it might take me a little longer to get it right. Patience with someone who is trying is always the way to go. So, thank you for that. Working with Zoe has given me hope that inter-generational bridges can be built and remain stable. This is the passing of the torch.

This month we decided to interview one of our 2020 POZ-TO Honorees, Carlos Idibouo. He's a fellow activist and a well-traveled individual. Because he is in and out of the Canada a lot, I've never had the chance to chat with him. So, this should be a great opportunity to learn more about the man and his work.

AK: Carlos...thank you so much for taking time to out of your busy schedule to talk with me today. How are you? And most importantly...where are you? Oh...and how many languages do you speak?

CI: Hello Alphonso, thanks to you for giving me the opportunity to chat with. I am doing wonderful. Since January 2021, I decided to live in Côte d’Ivoire my home country after living for 16 years in Canada. I confess there is a lot of things that I am missing from Canada, especially from Toronto and Montreal. Fortunately, I have some opportunities to go back from time to time ‘cause I am still involved with some community based organizations over there. Umm… how many languages do I speak? I speak three international languages: French which is my first colonial language, English and a bit of Spanish. Also speak my parents’ languages which are Bété, from the central-west part of Côte d’Ivoire and Agni which is from part of South and East of Côte d’Ivoire.

AK: So, would you mind giving our readers a little background about yourself...where were you born and how did you come to live in Canada?

CI: Well, I was born in Toumodi, a small city in the central part of Côte d’Ivoire. Back in the days, my dad was working there and that’s where he met my mom. She was previously married with my older brothers and sisters’ father. Funny thing, he happened to be a very good friend of my dad. In total, I have 11 sisters and 5 brother from both my dad and mom. So, I literally grew up with lots of women around me. At age 8, one of aunts took me with her to France. Later I understood that my father was so concerned by the fact that my sisters will feminize me that I had to go away. I came to Canada in August 2006 for the AIDS Conference and thanks to a dear friend of mine that I met for the first time at the conference, I decided to stay in Toronto. Honestly, I never planned to stay in Canada. I never came to North America before the AIDS Conference. I was instead planning to go to Geneva because at least, I had some friends there. Then I changed my mind and decided to stay in Toronto. The major reason why I stayed in Toronto was, even though there is no law criminalizing same sex relationship in Côte d’Ivoire, the media outed me by putting my picture as a cover of one of the national newspapers. I was leading the first registered queer organization that I co-founded back in July 2003 and because of that brutal outing, the members of the organization gave up and accused me for outing them as well. I was depressed and I only wanted to just disappear. So Toronto happened to be the right opportunity.

AK: Now, if you don't mind sharing...how long have you been HIV+ and how did you become an activist?

CI: I was diagnosed HIV+ on May 1st 2012. I was getting ready to move back to Toronto after my studies in Montreal for two years. I wasn't experiencing any symptoms. I went to a clinic to get some routine STIs tests. So, I voluntarily did another HIV test. I wasn’t chocked. I was confused, but I knew exactly what to do since I was already working in the HIV/AIDS field for years. The confusion slowly increased and completely turned into a deep anger when my partner and broke up the same year. I was angry all the time; I was just angry about every single thing. I swore against the day I decided to stay in Canada. I blamed myself. I blamed my relationship because I thought, I could have avoided this to happening to me. I even made the decision to come back to Côte d’Ivoire. Slowly, I turned that anger into a sort of therapy. I refused to see a psychotherapist. I just did my own therapy by constantly talking to myself and writing. I never really considered myself as an activist. People call me an activist, I guess because of the fact that I naturally put myself upfront whenever a situation stands against one of my personal values: social justice. The word activism is a label. Anytime I hear that word, I feel like it’s another fashion. I hate anything that will compromise a human being or a life. I hate violence, especially violence against women, children, queer people or people living with a disability. I happened to build my profile and career in contributing in a social justice movement for the simple reason that I spent most of my childhood and adolescence in a very violent environment. So, when I left the family house for the second time to go to university, I deeply made the decision not the stay SILENT ANYMORE! So, I define myself as an AfroQueer feminist for social justice. Because I stand for social justice, being vocal about my HIV status has always been the way to continue my work as a community leader.

AK: I've seen you on a couple of campaigns. What organizations have you worked with and what are you working on now?

CI: One of the campaigns was on U=U with Public Health Canada. I truly liked that campaign for the simple raison that it was a powerful message that was significantly changing the narrative for people living with HIV, but also for the entire world. I have been one of the HIV human rights faces. So, I when I got contacted by Public Health, I did not think twice. I had a message for youth on the science evidence based as Francophone spokesperson for the U=U campaign in many francophone countries. So, I was really proud to be part of it at home (Canada). Another campaign was about sharing my experience as a black African francophone and immigrant living with HIV in English speaking province (Ontario). I worked for several organizations such as the AIDS Committee of Toronto, FrancoQueer, Action Positive and La Passerelle-I.D.E. Then I slowly started to build my profile as an international consultant. I did not want any full-time position to limit me as a social justice leader. So, by managing my own working agenda, I am still upfront. I am currently working as a consultant for a community health NGO called Enda santé based in Côte d’Ivoire. I am also managing a NGO the House of Culture for Human Diversity that I co-founded as well as the first African Francophone Queer network call Fierté Afrique Francophone (FAF). As mentor for many youth in the West African sub-region, I am working on setting a pool of 15 queer youth and guide them in building an Advocacy high level profile. Of course I need some resources to achieve that goal.

AK: Are there any campaigns or organizations you would like to work on? I'm hoping I can get you to join our HIV IS EVERYONE'S BUSINESS campaign.

CI: When I first got back to Côte d’Ivoire, I wanted to continue my work around raising awareness on U=U. The national guidelines on HIV were not open yet for spreading any message about U=U. So, I am doing some advocacy work towards the Health Ministry and the National Programme for AIDS so I can start that campaign. We can discuss about the HIV IS EVERYONE’S BUSINESS campaign and I will surely be happy to join. Keep me posted and I will definitely make time for it.

AK: Before I let you go, if you could give advice to a young man who has been just diagnosed as being positive, what would it be?

CI: I strongly believe in youth leadership. That’s what gives me the strength and passion to keep going. That said an advice that I can give to a young person who has been just diagnosed as being positive to strongly trust the Science Evidence-based information that is the foundation of the U=U. And that fortunately we reached a time where the treatments as significantly change the trajectory in millions and millions of people and other youth across the world. And that if those young people made it, they can also make it through.

AK: Great advice, Carlos. I hope we get to hang out socially when you're back in Toronto. Thank you again for doing this interview. Continue to do the good work you are doing, and I hope if you have any projects in the future that you're working on that you will share them with us so we can promote them.

CI: Thanks again to you for doing this tremendous work. I have been following you for years and I am truly proud of you. I will surely let you when I am in Toronto next and it will lovely to hang out with you.

In Toronto May 5th, check out: hmps://www.facebook.com/events/3298719973773821

Listen to the mix here: https://www.mixcloud.com/djrelentlessny/ear-candy-may-2023

Download the video of this mix here: https://krakenfiles.com/view/Acc7Y0P0Sf/file.html

Check out DJ Relentless’ Mixcloud page: https://www.mixcloud.com/djrelentlessny

Check out DJ Relentless’ HearThis page: https://hearthis.at/djrelentlesstoronto

It's the month of May and finally some sunshine and warmth has arrived. Mother's Day is around the corner and we've got twenty selec;ons to talk about...some new ones, some remixed ones and definitely some fun ones! Hopefully something for everyone in the mix.

In the last month, we lost one of the great Blue-Eyed Soul Ar.sts, FOX News paid Dominion $780 million in hush money to stay out of court, a well known drag icon who was transphobic and a 45 supporter passed away, Bad Bunny in my opinion is making a huge mistake in his da;ng life, Tucker Carlson and Don Lemon lost their jobs on the same day.

I write this column to hopefully educate the reader about new music, new remixes and to infuse Pop Culture with the news of the day. The opinions expressed in my blogs are just mine and I do not apologize for having said opinions. I encourage everyone to start thinking for themselves and start expressing their own opinions in your daily life. But remember…your opinions are not laws, guidelines or should have any bearing on anyone else’s life. That’s where we get into dangerous territory.

I say all of this to say “If I can get you to talk about current events and music I have done my job.”

So let’s get started…

Mother’s Day is on Sunday May 14th. Not only is it a day to honor the women who brought us in the world or nurtured our youth, it’s also the same day I will be spinning for a SUNDAY TEA DANCE Live to benefit the Toronto People With AIDS FoundaGon at Glad Day Bookshop. So, to start this month’s mix I chose the Danny Morris Radio Remix of “Mother” by Meghan Trainor. Danny’s fun Pop remix was the perfect start for this month.

And I just had to throw some support behind Billy Porter’s new single, “Baby Was A Dancer” Ever since working with him last year when he directed an episode of ACCUSED I have gained a new respect for who he is and what he represents to black gay men. I saw an interview and he said that this song is him telling his story in the third person. I’m hoping that there will be remixes because this track is really short but deserves a good longer Disco mix.

When I first read “Borderline” was the new single by Tove Lo I was hoping and praying that it was a cover of the Madonna classic. But unfortunately, it was not. The song is okay. It’s not one of my favourites, but the Craig Welsh Club Mix makes it beWer for one of my sets.

I always love when Pink pays tribute to ar;sts that came before her. That’s just the way the music industry should be. From ar;st that influenced you to producers and DJs who came before you and paved the way. It’s important. I loved her tribute to Olivia Newton-John last fall and now I’m loving her beau;ful tribute to Prince with her performance on the BBC of “Nothing Compares 2 U”. And my friend BreW Brisbois did a wonderful job with transforming this ballad into a DJ friendly Club mix.

Back in the late 70s when I was around 10 years old you could not tell me that Bobby Caldwell was not black. “What You Won’t Do For Love” was part of the fabric of R&B radio back then. I would later learn a\er star;ng to work in radio in 1980 with my uncle that this was called BlueEyed Soul. Folks like Hall & Oates, Elton John, David Bowie and most definitely Teena Marie were welcomed on Black Radio and Soul Train. So, I was very sad to hear of Bobby’s passing last month. And weirdly enough there had not been a proper House remix of this classic…un;l now. The Jack Roy Remix did him jus;ce and gave us DJs something we could work with in a mix.

And speaking of Teena Marie, there’s a really great cover of her classic “I Need Your Lovin’” by Spencer Morales featuring Tasha Larae. I haven’t heard the original mix but the Opolopo Remix is fuckin’ banging!

Our sixth selec;on is a reboot of a 90s classic…“Love For Love” by 71 Digits x Robin S. Yet another remixer/producer puang their name before the actual ar;st instead of saying they remixed the track. It’s okay as a remix but the only thing I love about this project is the video. With all these an;-drag laws going into effect it was nice to see them transform the narra;ve to a drag show in the basement in color.

You know…the problem with songs that have the same ;tle is that a internet search could go sideways very quickly. Our seventh track is “Oops” by Oliver Heldens featuring Karen Harding.

And no this is not a cover of Britney Spears’ smash breakout hit. I love Karen as a vocalist, but I really hope that she gets a big hit someday that highlights her vocals and puts her center stage to have her diva moment. This track is nice but I am afraid it will be lost in the shuffle and forgoWen in a month or so.

You know…for a long ;me I have not figured out how Ed Sheeran got away with ripping off Marvin Gaye with his song, “Thinking Out Loud”. From the second I heard it I immediately said “That’s just a rewrite of “Let’s Get It On”!” Well, finally he is answering for it in court. It’s so interes;ng that people think that they are so crea;ve when there are only so many notes to be played. And a classic by Marvin Gaye is a part of our culture and the fabric of what music is today. I’m just glad that he is going to have to finally speak truthfully about it.

But we’re not here to talk about his latest single, “Eyes Closed”. I have to say that I can kinda take or leave Ed’s music. Not since “Sing” had I really loved an Ed Sheeran song…and that’s probably because it was produced by Pharrell Williams. I don’t find his music bad but more like filler. It’s Pop and it works for a general dance floor in some cases like weddings and corporate events. The J Bruus Remix is the only version that I can work with as far as playing it.

A couple of years ago when I watched LaXo performing “Big Energy” on the MTV Awards I knew she was going to get into the Pop charts. She’s the Atlanta version of Cardi B. And on our tenth selec;on for this month’s mix, her and Lu Kala bring the fyre on the Craig Welsh Remix of “LoXery”

The eleventh selec;on is my Relentlessly Touched Vocal of “Princess Diana” by Ice Spice & Nicki Minaj. Maybe it’s me or my age, but the ;tle kinda made me cringe. Probably because I remember spinning at The Hangar on Christopher and the news of her death coming on the screens while I was changing the visuals tape. It was a real moment in my life. I’m sure Diana’s death means absolutely nothing to Miss Ice or Miss Minaj. But with all that put aside, I heard the original and something said this could be a preWy hot House mix. And so I did one and then edited a video for it.

Our twel\h track is the Darryl Strickland Mashup of “100% Pure Love” by Crystal Waters and “Cozy” by Beyoncé called “100% Cozy”. I s;ll say that Beyoncé made a huge mistake by not doing any music videos for this latest album. But man….have the remixers have been workin’ over;me to make sure she stays on the decks of most DJs. Thank God there was all this promo;onal footage for her clothing line that could be edited to use as a visual for any of her latest material.

Up next is one of my champions of equality and self-love…Lizzo with her single “Special”. It’s a Pop ballad but the Ion The Prize Remix gives us that Club bounce that we so need and deserve. Just wish it was a liWle longer. And thank you, Lizzo for bringing out drag queens on the stage during your concert in Tennessee. Their an;-drag laws are just ridiculous! I’m hoping that everyone who can vote realizes that their local government is where it starts. You cain’t just show up every four years for the PresidenNal elecNon hWps://www.facebook.com/events/740119380489160/740128133821618

Our fourteenth selec;on is the Kay Stafford Club Mix of “I Feel Like Dancing” by Jason Mraz. Now remember at the beginning of this ar;cle I said some would be fun. This is a fun one! I love the lyrics. I love the video! And I love this remix!

I was watching The Late Show with Stephen Colbert back in February and RAYE made her U.S. debut late night performance with a song called “Escapism” featuring 070 Shake. It was part Jazz and then morphed into Hip Hop. It was interes;ng but I did not see it being on any of my playlists un;l I heard the Danny Verde Remix.

As I always say “What’s old is new.” There’s nothing like geang a remix of a classic Rock song from the 80s that tackles today’s dance floor. So when I heard the DJ Rublev & DJ Anton Mashup of “Living On A Prayer” by Bon Jovi vs Bryce Nitro. Some get really mad when they touch an oldie track or song. I say if done right it can introduce a classic to a new young audience. I feel that this one got it right.

For our seventeenth selec;on we are gonna switch gears and drop down to a Hip Hop speed with “Love In The Way” by Yung Bleu & Nicki Minaj. If I didn’t know any beWer I’d swear that Nicki is trying to recreate her reign of terror in the Pop charts like she did in the 2010s. Can she do it again? Don’t know but gues;ng on everything that comes along like the new Kim Petras sure seems desperate. Hopefully they will be a good remix to come along ‘cuz that sample of “BeXer Off Alone” by Alice Deejay is so ;red! But I digressed….this track by Yung Bleu is not much to write home about.

Now, I’m not sure where FLO came from but her new single “Fly Girl” featuring Missy EllioX has got my aWen;on! I believe the basis of this song was taken from Missy’s rap on “Work It” and it’s a sure shot to get her plenty of radio play!

I generally stay out of the drag queen gossip and feuds but I could not resist when I heard Bob The Drag Queen’s clap back to Mistress Isabella Brooks for her dis-track “Ode To Monet’s Understudy”. And I’m sorry…but Bob ate this ho! I listened to Isabelle’s track and it sounded dated. But the “reads” on Bob’s track were priceless! Don’t ever come for someone unless you are ready to slay! So, I had to give Bob props on this one. Oh…and be sure to check out Bob’s track with his kids called “Gay Barz” for some real Gay Hip Hop!

And to close out our mix I chose “Bop Slide” by Bankrol Hayden featuring Blueface, OHGEESY & Maxo Kream. I had seen Hayden’s name before but never really paid any aWen;on before. This par;cular song has a great hook and makes yaw anna dance (at least in my opinion). I’ll definitely be programming this one for my urban sets.