For Your Convenience

Words And Art By Daniel Demarse

When marijuana was decriminalized in New York state, it did not mean that it was legal to sell, only to possess. Nonetheless, convenience stores around the city started selling it under the table. One of such stores is located outside of Pratt. Since attending Pratt, this store has been a part of my academic routine of obsession. I would usually purchase an IPA before class, and, if I had some extra dough, these sour gummy edibles that were way too potent.

A story of obsession, in my case, must be a story of ingestion. I like ingesting things before I do things. Always have. It is my form of officiation. It cinches both sides of the action, its beginning and end. That’s why I smoke cigarettes. That’s why I used to drink IPAs before class.

I got it all from the same place—my beloved convenience store next to Luigi’s pizza. I have gotten to know the guys at the register a little bit. There’s Jimmy, a tall gangly guy who smokes joints outside the store; and London, who allegedly works there, he said he did, but I think he’s just a haunt. I spoke to him once about worker’s comp and angling on the Hudson upstate, all while I polished off two IPAs and a pizza.

The more interest I showed in their marijuana products, the friendlier they were to me. You have to understand—this is how the exchange works. I think they were also impressed with how much I could drink. I told Jimmy that I got toasted so I could study. This is true.

But one day, I took way too many gummies before class and entered Bizarro World. That’s not to say that I am not used to Bizarro

World, but it didn’t bode well that day for me. I was knee-deep in ideas of reference, a psychotic situation in which everything about the external World seems relevant to oneself, and everything everybody said meant something judgmental about me or was just generally ominous. I was wearing the only mask I could find at the time, but it was one of those gag ones with a smiley on it that in the wake of the pandemic may have seemed out of touch, and everything I said just sounded pretentious. Anyone with self-esteem issues knows how these piddling details can give you unexpected grief, especially when one is stoned.

A lesson to learn from all this must be that I shouldn’t officiate my actions by ingesting, consuming. There is enough to consume when it comes to the sense-stimulus around keeping track of my academic responsibilities. Enough anxiety to consume myself in flame.

These days, I am more responsible about my responsibilities. I save the IPA for after class. Sometimes.

A few days ago, I went to enact my usual officiation at the convenience store. There were cops inside and two patrol cars outsideone of which was a van. They told me to wait to come in. I thought, maybe they finally got wise. Maybe the cops were always wise. But at this point, the illegality of selling marijuana is such a gray area, that maybe I can write this article about it without ‘blowing up their spot’ as the kids say. Hopefully, this effort can even give them more business.

Just, don’t buy the unregulated gummies.