8 minute read
A mind that works differently
A mind that works differently
Erin Burnett articulates what it is like to have autism and describes the challenges it brings to her faith.
Jesus instructs us to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind” – but what if your mind works differently?
For as long as I can remember, I have always felt different.
It was as if there was an invisible wall between me and other people. I desperately wanted to experience friendship and connection, yet there was something holding me back. At school I would retreat into my own inner world and spend most of the day in silence. Instead of keeping up with the latest music and social media trends, I had very narrow and intense interests – anything from Pokémon to 20th century politics could capture my interest for months or years at a time.
I was raised in a Christian household and started to take my own faith seriously around the age of 12 after the Gideons visited my school. Reading the New Testament for myself marked the beginning of an intense, tumultuous and ultimately lifegiving faith journey. I was particularly captivated by John 15:15, when Jesus says, “I have called you friend” – this verse was an anchor for me when I was feeling isolated.
My social difficulties persisted throughout my school years and I ended up being referred to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS). Several rounds of talking therapy helped somewhat, but still didn’t get to the root cause of my disconnection from other people. Towards the end of my time at CAMHS I saw a different psychiatrist who recognised the cause of my difficulties straight away, for which I will always be grateful.
After years of struggling to fit in, I finally had an answer: I was autistic.
What is autism?
It is very difficult to precisely define autism, as it is a spectrum condition that manifests differently for each person. The stereotypical image of autism is that of a child, typically male, trapped in their own world and unable to communicate. This is only one of many ways in which autistic people present. The autism spectrum can range from someone who is slightly quirky to someone with profound disability who requires 24/7 care, and every degree in between.
The most significant characteristic of autism is social difficulty. Some autistic people are non-verbal, meaning they do not speak, and those of us who can speak find the unwritten rules of conversation hard to follow. Another characteristic is sensory sensitivity – autistic people tend to dislike loud noise, bright lights and other overwhelming stimuli.
Despite these difficulties, there are many positive aspects to autism. We have very intense interests and can hyperfocus on topics that intrigue us – this is a useful skill to have in academia or STEM careers. Getting a diagnosis was life-changing for me, as I understood the cause of my difficulties and could develop healthy coping strategies. I was able to identify and develop my strengths instead of getting upset over my weaknesses.
Most people are impacted by autism in some way, either by being on the spectrum themselves or by knowing someone who is. It is important to point out that every autistic person presents differently, and I cannot speak on behalf of everyone with the condition. Just like everyone else, autistic people are made in the image of God and have their own unique strengths and weaknesses.
Listening to the individual is key: if you want to better understand an autistic person in your life, get to know them. Asking about their interests is usually a good place to start – just be prepared for a very impassioned lecture on whatever topic they’re into! Or, if they cannot communicate for themselves, ask the person who knows them best.
Autism and the church
Shortly after I got my official diagnosis, I went to study at Union Theological College, where over the course of three years I was able to develop my interest in theology while also gaining vital social skills. For my final year dissertation I decided to research the experiences of autistic churchgoers. What aspects of church are challenging for autistic people, and what parts of faith do they find meaningful?
Starting with the challenges, church services can often be tricky for those with sensory issues, particularly churches that have a contemporary approach to worship. Modern worship can be very loud and bright, which may be distressing for autistic people in the congregation. However, this doesn’t mean the church has to change the way it worships – there are simple and effective adjustments that can be made to make worship more accessible for everyone. For example, I once attended a very lively and noisy international church in Japan, and they had a basket of earplugs you could help yourself to in the foyer of the church. It may seem like a trivial gesture, but it meant so much to me – here I am writing about it almost three years later! It is such a simple and inexpensive way to let people with hypersensitivity to sound know that they are welcome.
Many autistic people struggle with the relational aspect of Christianity. I have always struggled with the idea of having a ‘personal relationship with Jesus’. I find it hard enough to have a relationship with people I can see, let alone someone I can’t physically interact with. I still struggle with feeling like an inferior Christian compared to others who experience an intimate, direct connection with God, but I am learning how I can honour God through other means, like studying theology, and writing and engaging in practical theology. In the words of Matthew Allen, a fellow autistic Christian and Union alumnus, “There are as many ways to know God as there are Christians who love him.”
Autism is not directly mentioned in the Bible, as it was only formally recognised in the 1940s, but there are many relevant verses that can be applied today. One of my favourite passages is 1 Corinthians 12:14–27, wherein Paul compares the church to a human body. Each part has its own unique part to play, and no part is better than another: “Those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable” (v22). The church can be a prophetic witness in a society that often sees disabled people as a burden rather than individuals loved by God.
God can use autistic people’s special interests for his purposes. For instance, I have always loved everything Japanese, which led to me getting involved with a missionary organisation called OMF. I attended a prayer group comprised of former and aspiring missionaries to Japan, which was really helpful for me both spiritually and socially. I had the opportunity to visit Japan and write a report about the social rejection Japanese Christians experience, something I could empathise with. The paper was published in an academic journal and I had the opportunity to speak about it at an international conference. All this stemmed from an initial interest in Pokémon during childhood!
Living as an autistic Christian
Living with autism has its highs and lows, and I’m deeply grateful for all the supportive church communities I have been part of over the years. As diagnostic services improve, the amount of people being diagnosed with autism increases every year – it is vital that churches have an understanding of the condition and are prepared to welcome autistic people into their congregations.
I recently published a booklet entitled With All Your Mind: Autism and the church based on the research I did at university. Using a blend of biblical teaching, scientific research and personal stories, With All Your Mind offers guidance on welcoming autistic people into the body of Christ and suggests ways that churches can be more accommodating. I do not intend my booklet to be a prescriptive textbook; rather, it should be a conversation starter.
As an autistic Christian, I have a deep desire to be part of something beyond myself, to follow the teachings of Jesus and establish the kingdom of God on earth. I may struggle with certain aspects of faith, but this I know: God is love, and autistic people are just as capable of giving and receiving love as anyone else.
Erin Burnett was born and raised in Belfast. She has a theology degree from Union Theological College and is currently studying for a MTh Practical Theology degree at the University of Glasgow.
Erin’s book, With All Your Mind: Autism and the church, is priced at £4.50 and available from http:// erinburnettauthor. co.uk/nonfiction To see a review of With All Your Mind, go to page 38.
