Deeper together in friendship

This Bible study was included in the Inspirations book for Deeper Together and we share it with Wider World readers who might not have studied it in groups yet.

Chat: What are the qualities you look for in a friend? What can cause problems within friendships?

A friendship which Scripture gives us lots of details about is not actually between two women, but between two men, Jonathan and David. Let’s trace their friendship and discover some truths that will help us to be better friends to one another.

>> Read

Read the following verses which introduce David and the context in which he found himself:

1 Samuel 13:13-14; 1 Samuel 16:1, 6-7 & 10-13

>> Discuss

1. Why had God rejected Saul as King of Israel?

2. What characteristic was God looking for in the next King of Israel? 1 Samuel 13:14 & 1 Samuel 16:7

3. What can we learn from these verses about judging people from outward appearance? What qualities should we look for?

The prophet Samuel told Saul that God had rejected him as King because of his disobedience and had chosen a man after his own heart to be his successor. So, the throne would not be handed down to Saul’s son, Jonathan.

>> Discuss

4. How do you think this might have made Jonathan feel?

>> Read

1 Samuel 18:1-4

>> Pause

A covenant is a binding agreement, in this case, an agreement of friendship, to care for and protect one another. In verse 4, we read that Jonathan gave David his clothes and military garb. The significance of this gift was that Jonathan recognised that David would one day be King. Given the depth of their friendship, it’s not hard to imagine that David had told Jonathan how the prophet Samuel had anointed him as a boy to be King over Israel. Now Jonathan was, in effect, stepping aside. There was no jealousy in his heart, no attempt at keeping his distance, no desire to protect his privileged position. Jonathan submitted to God’s will and sacrificed his own right to the throne.

>> Discuss

5. From these verses, what sort of relationship did David and Jonathan have? What’s striking about this?

6. What can we learn from Jonathan’s example here?

>> Read

1 Samuel 23:15-18

>> Discuss

7. How do you think David was feeling at this time? (v15)

8. What did Jonathan do? (v16 – note especially in whom Jonathan helped David to find strength)

>> Pause

David is going from one place to the other in the Wilderness of Ziph, trying to stay out of King Saul’s way. Saul wants to kill David because he thinks he’s a dangerous rival for the throne. Jonathan, Saul’s son, is concerned about David, hears where he is hiding, and goes down to encourage him.

David was a man after God’s own heart; he was a great warrior who was loved by the people (1 Samuel 18:5-7), but even he needed encouragement. We should never think that anyone is so strong that they don’t need to be strengthened in God. Nor should we think that someone is so far above us that we can’t be God’s instrument to strengthen them.

The way Jonathan strengthened David in God was to remind him of the promise that God had made (1 Samuel 16:12). Saul could not succeed against David because God was for him. So, Jonathan strengthened David by reminding him of his destiny in the purposes of God (1 Samuel 23:17).

>> Discuss

9. The friendship between Jonathan and David was God-centred. What would it mean for us to have God-centred friendships?

10. How can we strengthen someone’s hand in God?

>> Reflect

We help each other most when we encourage each other to depend on God. When we remind each other of God’s promises, it strengthens faith that may have wavered.

>> Pray

Praise God for his faithfulness. Confess the ways in which you have failed to point others to God in a time of need.

Give thanks for those who have been an encouragement to you and ask God to help you be intentional about strengthening others in him.