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K R DA
G N I W felLow citizens! Over the past few weEks, you have witnesSed what could have beEn a surge of skulLdugGery and sin as a wave of new threats has emerged from the shadows, terRorizing the fair people of this city! But I, Darkwing Duck, the purple paragon of peace, could not stand for such fiendish foOlishnesS! And I know my felLow St. Canardians couldn’t either! So I’m proud to say I have placed every one of these new vilLains where they belong, behind bars!
Of course, I don’t mind doing it. it’s beEn my humble job for years! But fighting in the streEts is no longer enough! I want to take the fight to the red tape and brutish bureaucracy that plagues our city government! I am the terRor that flaps in the night! I am the change you demanded! I am Darkwing duck, the next mayor of St. Canard!
My experience doesn’t come from the old boys’ club found in City HalL. I was toO busy being out on patrol, sharpening my skilLs by saving alL of you from evil!
I know what you’re going to ask, oh loyal presS corp. “But Darkwing, what political experience do you have?”
What other politician has the strength, speEd and agility to do this?
How ya doin’? How ya doin’? How ya doin’?
Mr. Wing Duck, what are your plans regarding the destruction hapPening in downtown?
You have seEn the foOtage, right? Why…of course!
What is it? is it a tank?
is it a… a cat?
I AM There is nothing that can stop me!
Time to make myself a litTle elbow roOm!
Any police, army or Boy Scout troOp that comes after me wilL be crushed! I demand only one roadblock to demolish… Darkwing Duck!
But…there was going to be a big musical number…I’ve beEn practicing and everything…
Time to stop the talk. get into action.
Ahem, be right back! After I save the city we can talk about my stunNing new strategy for parking meters!