A CO N V E RSAT I O N W I T H
© Natalie Dawkins
R I CH A R D R O P E R
1. When We Were Young is your second novel. What inspired you to write this story? A few years ago, feeling a little adrift and directionless, I decided to walk the Thames Path—the 184-mile trail that starts at a little pile of stones in a field in Gloucestershire and ends at the Thames Barrier in London. As the miles unfolded, so did the memories of my time growing up in the countryside—of endless summer days and friendships forged in cider and terrible bands. That painful swell of nostalgia kept on long after I finished the walk. It made me think about those formative years when you’re on the brink of adulthood, unaware that the songs and TV shows you’re obsessing over then will act as a time machine, catapulting you back through the years when they come on shuffle or while you’re channel-hopping in the decades to come. It also made me think about the friends you make who are such a massive part of that time, but who end up drifting away when the vagaries of adulthood appear. What if you were given the chance to reconnect with someone and re-form those bonds? How much of you is still that uncertain teenager, how much have you really moved on? This was the basis for Theo and Joel’s story.
2. How was writing When We Were Young similar to or different from writing your previous novel, Something to Live For? Do you have a favorite part of the writing process? Something to Live For came to me almost fully formed as an idea. This, I gather, is a pretty rare event in a writer’s career! The process differed for When We Were Young in that the book changed an awful lot from the first draft. For instance, the very first iteration only had the story from Theo’s perspective, but then I realized that we needed Joel’s point of view, too. My favorite part of the process tends to be when I am away from my desk. I will be on a bus or on a walk and an idea for a big moment or funny line or character detail will appear out of the ether, and I will desperately write it down on the notes on my phone. This tends to be less successful when I have such thoughts in the middle of the night, when I am not particularly lucid, and then have to spend the next few days wondering what on earth I meant by a note that simply reads “jazz night exorcism!” or similar.
3. Who do you relate to more—Theo or Joel—and are either of these characters based on real people? I am more Theo, certainly. I was cripplingly shy as a child, and comedy provided a lot of solace. I have a great deal of affection for Theo in how much of a mess he finds himself in all the time, but I like to think I am a bit more together as a person than he is! Joel isn’t based on anyone particular (though that hasn’t stopped my friends asking if it’s actually them). Funnily enough, the only deliberate character point that I stole was his name. There were a couple of kids I knew at school, and in the local music scene I (tragically) was part of, who were called Joel. They seemed to be unimaginably cooler than me—they skateboarded! They had their own car! And so I knew that Theo’s counterpoint would be a Joel type. Fun fact, I also liked it because the “eo” and “oe” of Theo’s and Joel’s names are mirror images. One hundred pounds if you spotted that. . . .
4. When We Were Young dives deep into a friendship between two men, which is not as frequently explored in literature as female friendship. What do you think is special about Joel and Theo’s relationship? I really wanted to write something that was authentic, to me at least, about male friendship. In my experience, men can know other men for years, count themselves as true friends to each other, but still find it incredibly hard to communicate about anything serious. One of my favorite comedy routines is by an Irish stand-up called Dylan Moran, where he summarizes the art of male communication thus: “It’s your turn to talk when the other guy has the drink up to his face.” Men are particularly gifted at spending hours and hours together while talking about things of no consequence whatsoever. Some of my most memorable evenings in the pub have been based around conversation on entirely forgettable topics. But therein lies a truth about male friendship. Even the most emotionally available men find it hard to talk to their friends sincerely about things that are upsetting or worrying them. There are lots of men’s mental health campaigns at the moment where the focus is on getting men to open up to each other— be vulnerable and admit to their insecurities. Theo and Joel’s friendship was my attempt to show all the highs and lows of what men go through when they’ve known someone for a very long time.
5. There are so many fun and heartwarming moments. What was your favorite scene to write in the novel, and why? I really enjoyed writing the scene where Theo and Joel ride the tandem bike for the first time, as it encapsulates their story. It is a moment when they are at once as carefree as they were in their youth while also being weighed down with adulthood. That was a really bittersweet few pages to write.
6. If you were in Joel’s position, is there any one thing you’d most want to do? Like Joel, I think it would just be a case of going on lots of fun adventures with my friends and family.
7. While Theo and Joel walk the Thames Path, they also metaphorically walk down the memory lane of their friendship. Do you have a fond memory from childhood that you reminisce about from time to time? If so, would you mind sharing it? The holidays that Theo reminisces about are all based on my own family trips. In fact, the scene where he and his family save the jellyfish is something that we did in real life. We used to go to the Pembrokeshire coast in South Wales, or Northumberland in the northeast of England. These were archetypally British holiday—lots of time spent sheltering from the rain on the beach—but I loved every second of them.
8. Is there something you would like readers to take away from When We Were Young? If people feel like they want to call up a friend just for a chat after they’ve finished reading, it then I know I’ll have done a good job.
9. Without giving anything away, did you always know how the story would end? No! In fact, it changed a few times until I found the one that worked best. I decided to keep it a secret from my editors to see how they reacted. They had some very strong feelings about that—in a good way, I should add!
10. What’s next for you? I am in the early stages of writing the next book. I have been mulling an idea for a while now, and the story is just starting to take shape.
D I S CUSS I O N Q U E ST I O N S 1.
Have you ever made a promise or pact with your friends? If so, what was it, and have you gotten the chance to fulfill it yet?
2.
On page 24, Theo observes that “Joel was a man who could pull off any hat you were to give him, no matter how novel, whereas I was a man who never fully trusted that an automatic door would open as I approached it.” Are you more like Theo or Joel, and how do you feel that has affected the decisions you’ve made in your life?
3.
Would you ever walk the entire Thames Path with a friend? If so, who would you choose to walk with?
4.
Theo and Joel recall countless fond memories from childhood. What is one of your favorite moments from your youth? Why was it special?
5.
Do you think the way Joel coerced Theo to walk the Thames Path was ultimately justified? Why or why not?
6.
Were you surprised to learn Joel and Amber’s secret? What would you have done if you were Joel in that same situation?
7.
Discuss the similar and different ways in which Joel and Theo acted in their respective relationships with Amber and Babs. Do you think one behaved better than the other?
8.
What was your favorite scene in the novel, and why?
9.
What do you think are the three most important traits in a best friend? Do you think Joel and Theo possess these traits? Why or why not?
10.
Have you ever had someone in your life who was “the still point of the turning world”? If so, who, and how so?
11.
Were you surprised by the ending?
W H E N W E W E R E YO U N G P L AY L I S T C U R AT E D BY
RICHARD ROPER Fuel Up by Stornoway
Old Friends by Pinegrove Surf Music by Paul Williams We’re Going to Be Friends by The White Stripes T-Shirt Weather by Circa Waves Reptilia by The Strokes We Will Become Silhouettes (The Shins Cover) by The Shins Blue Skies by Noah and the Whale Fake Tales of San Francisco by Arctic Monkeys My Best Friend by Weezer The Wider Sun by Jon Hopkins Hang On by Dr. Dog The Water feat. Laura Marling by Johnny Flynn, Laura Marling Fill in the Blank by Car Seat Headrest Lua by Bright Eyes Detectorists (Full Studio Version) by Johnny Flynn Moonlight Mile - 2009 Mix by The Rolling Stones The Night Will Always Win by Elbow House of Cards by Radiohead All My Friends by LCD Soundsystem