Project You Magazine, Back AT School Issue, Between Us Section by Project You Magazine

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BETWEEN US

7 Steps to a

Happy Marriage It can be as simple as talking less (read; no nagging) and drinking less (no comment). By Jenna McCarthy

have a remarkably happy marriage, and people ask me all the time how I got so lucky. I used to wonder if it had something to do with pheromones or having relatively low expectations, but after eleven years of wedded bliss I am pretty sure the key is some combination of kindness, respect and my ability to read a road map upside down divided by my husband’s skill at tun-

ing out my nagging. Okay, fine. We got lucky. Busloads of studies have attempted to figure out why roughly every other marriage fails miserably. Turns out, the success stories share a few similarities beyond the obvious stuff like “they don’t have sex with other people.” Here, then, are seven scientifically proven* steps to marital ecstasy. projectyou

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Be thinner and better looking than your hair than his precious need for non-recirculathusband. I have no idea why this works ed air? If anyone bothered to study this, I’m to create nuptial delight but I’m guessing it’s confident the results would back me up. because if you’re fat and ugly you probably So there you have it. I do not suggest trying never want to have sex, which makes him to master all seven steps at once. For grumpy and mean because sex was the instance, if you stop doing houseone and only reason he got married work altogether (to try to tilt his in the first place. (Well, that and pie. portion of the ratio toward more), Think about it: Most guys will nev- JennaMcCarthy.com you’ll have a lot of extra time on er bake a pie in their lifetimes and your hands which you may want to from what I’ve seen, they really like spend drinking alcohol. Remember, pie.) Of course, I don’t know many there’s no rush here. Till death do us women who are dying to have sex with part is a really long time.** fat, ugly men, so this one remains a bit of *I may have bastardized the language a bit in a mystery. some cases but the facts are mostly accurate. Make sure he does more chores than you **I stole that line from If It Was Easy They’d do (well, duh) and try to talk less than he Call the Whole Damn Thing a Honeymoon: does. I have to admit, if you asked my husband Living with and Loving the TV-Addicted, Sexthe top three things I could do to make him Obsessed, Not-So-Handy Man You Married, happier, “shut the hell up for five lousy min- which I wrote (and please note that it says the utes” would probably be on the list. (But not at blah-blah-blah man you married, not the one I the tippy-top. Ahem.) married. My husband likes it when I point that Don’t watch a lot of chick flicks. Seems that out). You can find out more about me, my books after sitting through Gnomio and Juliet and how I survived tanorexia on my website. ■ (or any other rom-com) relationship dissatisfaction tends to skyrocket. Apparently this is because maybe it could happen to you but you realize that it hasn’t and it probably won’t and that fat bastard never sprinkled rose petals on your bed, dammit. At least you’re thinner and better looking than he is. Don’t win a best-actress Oscar. I included this one because unlike getting hotter or having your jaw wired shut, it’s actually pretty painless and doable. Personally, I am going to make this a priority in my marriage. Limit your booze consumption (both of you). No comment. Become or urge your partner to become a farmer, nuclear engineer or optometrist. Evidently every career choice has its own unique divorce-risk profile, with these three being on the lowest end. Dancers and choreographers are pretty much screwed. You can’t make this stuff up. Prefer having the car windows down. I haven’t technically seen a study on this, but do you not fight about this every single time you ride in a vehicle together? And doesn’t he get all pissed when you want them up and ac- To purchase a copy of Jenna’s book, visit cuse you of being more concerned about your Amazon or your local bookstore today!

Jenna McCarthy

Click here to see Jenna’s hilarious book trailer!

2 3

4 Jenna McCarthy is the author of numerous books including If It Was Easy They’d Call the Whole Damn Thing a Honeymoon: Living With and Loving the TV-Addicted, SexObsessed, Not-So-Handy Man You Married, The Parent Trip: From High Heels and Parties to Highchairs and Potties and Cheers to the New Mom/Cheers to the New Dad. 26

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A Role Mommy Magazine l Back AT School 2011

BETWEEN US

Is It All Over for My Favorite Name? Baby Name Wizard’s “Name Lady” Answers Reader’s Questions

By Jennie Baird and Laura Wattenberg

I love the name Harper and had planned to use it for our baby girl, but it seems to be really popular now. Should I move on and find something else or just go with it and not worry about the rising popularity? —Ashley

There’s no question that Harper is a Gone With the Wind. Do you recognize the name name of the moment. In just a few years I’m describing? Yep, it’s your name, Ashley. it has risen from obscurity to #119 on the You know as well as anyone what it’s like to Social Security Administration’s list of most pop- have a trendy name. Did you feel that having a ular baby names. fashionable, well-liked name was an advantage What’s behind this sudden popularity? Harper in your life? Or did you think that you blended appeals to parents on a lot of different levels. It’s too easily into the crowd? Were you constantly a trade surname (like Cooper and Sawyer), a style referred to as Ashley B. in school? that neatly straddles the preppy and the earthy. I’m guessing that you didn’t like having such a It has both literary heritage and Southern flair popular name, since you’re trying to avoid choosthanks to America’s most famous Harper, Harper ing one for your daughter. If choosing a distincLee, the author of the beloved book-turnedtive, unusual name is important to you, then it’s movie To Kill a Mockingbird. The model probably time to move on from Harper. of Lee (a woman) also wins over a lot Do you have a But if you love the name Harper for its of parents who don’t usually like anquestion for the many other merits, you might want to drogynous names for girls. consider a key way that Harper is difName Lady? So yes, Harper is hitting the fashferent from Ashley: time. Send it to ask@ ion bull’s eye these days. And with Popular names today just aren’t what celebrities like Victoria and David namelady.com they used to be. There aren’t any AshleyBeckham, Neil Patrick Harris, Dave sized name crazes any more -- let alone the Grohl and Tiffani-Amber Theissen choosJennifers and Marys of past generations. Ashing Harper for their daughters over the past two ley, at its peak, was two-and-a-half times as popuyears, it’s likely that Harper will continue to rise. lar as the current #1 name Isabella is today...and But yet...Harper reminds me of another name a whopping 22 times as popular as Harper is. So that enjoyed a meteoric rise a generation ago. while it’s possible that your daughter would end up That name was also a surname-turned-boys- a “Harper B.,” it’s also likely that her name will be name-turned-girls name. And that name also had well-liked enough to have all the benefits of Asha literary heritage, via another hugely popular ley, without the downsides of a true mega-hit name. book-turned-movie about the American South -- And besides, you love it, right? ■

Jennie Baird and Laura Wattenberg are the creators of NameCandy. com and BabyName Wizard.com. NameCandy lets you “indulge your taste in names” with celebrity name news, the Ask the Name Lady advice column and more, while BabyNameWizard.com is the authoritative source for tools and analysis to help you find the perfect name. projectyou

project you By Elizabeth Mascali and Dawn Sandomeno

Halloween Decorating and Party Ideas on a Budget

Looking for an easy and inexpensive plan to prepare for Halloween? We put together an easy “how-to” guide for decorating for Halloween and hosting a pre/post trick or treating party without blowing your budget – simply “boo”tiful! With a one-stop shopping trip to Kmart we decorated the inside and outside of our homes for Halloween in a snap. And, once you’ve decorated for Halloween, you might as well invite some friends, families and/ or neighbors over for a party either before or after the trick or treating, right? Here are a few of our tricks for treating your family and/or guests to a spooktacular Halloween.

PartyBluPrintsBlog.com

DECORATING

When decorating for Halloween, focus your efforts on creating a look for your high-impact areas, such as your front walkway and door, your mantle, front entry, and, of course, your table!

Mantle We started with a black lace runner* (same spider web pattern as tablecloth). This time we used a burnt orange runner underneath for contrast. The backdrop of our look is a giant spider web* (a true bargain at $2.99), which we filled with plastic spider rings*. We switched out plain pillar candles on the candlesticks for haunted house themed LED candles* and positioned them on either end of the mantle, leaving room for our ghostly guests of honor. Front and center on the mantle are these freaky picture frames* whose pictures change when you move around the room, and they really get scary as they become possessed and begin speaking with glaring red eyes. *We purchased all these items on our one-stop shopping trip to Kmart. For our complete shopping list, including prices, and “the full spook” on more Halloween decorating ideas, go> 28

A Role Mommy Magazine l Back AT School 2011

Courtesy of Party BluPrints

Tablescape We started with a black lace spider web tablecloth* - to really make the pattern in the tablecloth pop, we laid it over a plain white table pad (this also protects the table!) To anchor the table, we used a spider cake stand* topped with an orange paper tissue pom which we accented with two different sizes of toys spiders* (each has an orange or purple stripe). Then, we used everyday white dinner dishes and fun orange and purple LED pumpkins*. Finally, it was time to bring in the treats. We collected a variety of glass jars/containers and filled them with various types of orange candy*. If you look carefully, you’ll notice an uninvited guest* trying to get in on the party (he’s a cheap guest at $1.99).

DINING

So now that we shared with you some of our tricks for decorating, it’s time for the treats! We had fun creating festive treats that scream Halloween without being candy. Here are two simple recipes that will make your guests say, “where did you buy these” – they don’t have to know how easy and inexpensive they were to whip up!

BETWEEN US

Ghoulish Ghost Jello Ingredients 4 boxes orange jello, Whipped cream, Mini chocolate chips Instructions Prepare jello according to package instructions. Pour into clear disposable cups, cover and refrigerate. When ready to serve, pipe a ghost on the top of each cup and use the mini chocolate chips to decorate the face. Note: if not using whipped cream from a can, fill a plastic sandwich bag 1/2 full with whipped cream, snip end of bottom corner off bag, the wider you cut it the larger the diameter of the piping. Starting at the base pipe the cream in a spiral with the base being the widest with each layer getting smaller until you end up with a peak. (Makes 12)

Bone-Sticks Ingredients 1 can refrigerated breadsticks (usually contains 12), Olive oil, Coarse sea salt Instructions Preheat oven to 375. Grease to baking sheets. Remove breadsticks from can, unroll and allow to warm to room temperature, six on each sheet. Gently stretch each breadstick to make it longer and skinnier. Using a knife, make a 1-inch cut into each end of breadstick and separate so it looks like a fishes tail. Then, roll each piece to the outside and back to the breadstick in a spiral. Repeat with other side and then other end. Once you have repeated this process with each breadstick, brush or spray each with olive oil and sprinkle on coarse sea salt. Bake for 8-10 until golden brown on the bottom. Remove from baking sheets, arrange on platter and serve. (Makes 12) ■

Elizabeth Mascali and Dawn Sandomeno are party and lifestyle authors, bloggers, and social media hostesses. Their first book, PLAN TO PARTY, (Yorkshire Publishing) offers ideas from their blog andis a go-to resource for home entertaining. projectyou

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Partners

✽ Connect with Your Teens Through Pop Culture and Technology Connect with your Teens through Pop Culture and Technology helps parents keep up-to-date with pop culture and technology as a way of bonding with their teens, tweens or young adults. ✽ The Partybluprints Blog is a Real Girls’ resource for entertaining in style. Its mission is to bring you the latest news, hottest trends and most importantly, tips and ideas for entertaining in your home. Its mantra is “simple and special” – the rule for each and every post. ✽ TravelingMom.com is a survival guide for moms who travel. TravelingMom.com brings real life travel stories, tips and advice aimed at helping moms who travel achieve positive and smooth experiences whether they are adventuring with their families, staying at home, or traveling solo. ✽ Tammy blogs at Three Different Directions. She and her family are really just a bunch of geeks, spending most of their time in front of their pcs playing WoW, blogging and just spending time together learning more about technology and themselves as they go along. She recently launched an entertainment blog, Play That Now, where she talks about DVDs, Video Games, Music and Gadgets. ✽ Freebie Spot is a place to get a little something for nothing. Find all the great deals on the web including freebies, coupons, and more all in one spot. You can also find some great giveaway and product reviews as well as personal posts about my crazy kids. ✽ Motherhood Moment is a blog created by Bekah, who she shares tips on everything from saving money and time to meal ideas and free time activities. She is a

work-at-home mother of 1-and 3-year-old daughters. ✽ Biz Mommy provides inspiration, educational resources, mentorship and support for women and moms who want to start their own home-based businesses. My goal is to serve as a motivating catalyst for women to make the move from self-doubt and procrastination to fearlessly creating a successful blog and online business that they love. ✽ The 24/7 Mom Heather is a 30-something year old SAHM to 4 crazy kiddos (11, 6, 3, 1). We live in Iowa with our 5 budgies and 2 lovebirds. When I’m not blogging, you’ll find me out at the soccer fields watching of the many practices or games we go to, reading, or digital scrapbooking! ✽ MamaBuzz Mel is a work at home, home schooling mama and wife with 2 rambunctious boys who keep her days filled with lots of hugs, giggles, and a ton of mud & grass stains. She loves to write and loves everything having to do with home decor, the great outdoors, etc. She writes 2 blogs....MamaBuzz and Real Heart Prints. ✽ Rural Mom is about empowering moms with the right information and tools to enjoy country life to the fullest! On RuralMom. com, you will find exciting article on women’s topics, reviews, green living, freebies, and a whole lotta frugal... from the desk of Barb Webb, author, eco-farmer, and mom of three. ✽ The Mom Jen is a former elementary school teacher who writes for The Mom Reviews, an online product review and giveaway site. She and her family love traveling around their home state of California reviewing hotels, restaurants, and family activities, parks and events.

Check out all the incredible partners who will be distributing Project You on their blogs and contributing to our magazine this year! Check out www.ProjectYouMagazine. com as more of our partners are featured! ✽ Go Graham Go is a savvy parenting blog featuring products, tips, and fun ideas for parents. Come find the best bang for your buck and collaborate with other parents! ✽ The Mom Trap is a blog dedicated to capturing the moments of motherhood, from the toddler years to the college years and beyond. ✽ Mommy PR is a group of 5 women who have varied backgrounds in marketing, sales and management. MommyPR.com specializes in Online Marketing, Social Media, Product Reviews & Giveaways. ✽ Sarah Peppel is a freelance writer, columnist, mom blogger (Genesis Moments & DIY Frugal), communications professor, speaker, actress and plain ole’ mom to her two growing teen girls. She is also president of womens ministries in her presbytery and president of the neighbor homeowner’s association. ✽ Momma Young at Home is a blog dedicated to family life, crafts, recipes, reviews, giveaways and more! ✽ Simply Being Mommy is a parenting blog written by Crystal Reagan, wife to one amazing man and mommy to three adorable children. She enjoys the finer things in life and is on a mission to find the most extraordinary products for you and your family. ✽ Dumb Mom is the brainiac behind the slightly-less-popular-than-it-rightfullyshould humor and parenting blog, Parenting BY Dummies. She dicusses childhood, parenthood, and all the hoods in between as she partners with Dumb Dad in raising three sometimes-evil-but-shamefully-handsome boy geniuses.

To become a Project You Partner, please email us at ProjectYouMagazine@gmail.com.

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Partners

✽ My name is Kimberly and at Pretty Pink Momma I enjoy sharing chic mom must haves and fab family finds. Product reviews and giveaways are offered weekly. I also blog about my three boys and my journey to become a healthier, happier me. ✽ At Just Precious, Julie Meyers Pron blogs about parenting and education from the perspective of the parent, the teacher and the PTO director. Readers love Just Precious for Julie’s positive spin and encouragement, her realistic look at all parts of education, and her entertaining parenting stories. The Ask the Teacher series allows parents to ask anything and receive frank, honest opinions on educational and parenting issues. ✽ Susan M. Heim, a parenting author and Chicken Soup for the Soul editor, shares her personal and professional thoughts and experiences on raising children in today’s world. Family-friendly product reviews and giveaways are often featured. ✽ Woman Tribune is a daily-updated webspace for women that explores and discusses our Woman Wide World. It was founded with the mindset that no one has just one interest or one topic they like to read about and we strive to have a little something for everyone, regardless of their location or lifestyle. ✽ Cristie Ritz King is a writer, wife and mom of three and performs these roles daily, in no particular order. She blogs about her kids, pop-culture and all things music and television related at The Traveling Circus and as a founder of Jersey Moms Blog. On her business site, The Right Hand Mom Cristie handles her role as Baby Planner and Parent Educator much more seriously-although never too seriously.

✽ Confessions of an Overworked Mom is the place for busy moms to learn about eco-friendly, time saving, gourmet products. ✽ Shari Simpson is the editor of NJ Mommy Poppins and blogs at “Earth Mother just means I’m dusty”, where she expounds on mom-fabulosity, kissing pugs on the mouth. and bearing children in the nick of time before menopause set in. ✽ BabyNameWizard.com is the online home of baby name experts Jennie Baird and Laura Wattenberg. Baby Name Wizard’s addictive tools including NameVoyager, NameMapper and Name MatchMaker, are a fun way for parents andparents-to-be to explore a new world of naming choices. BabyNameWizard.com was named one of TIME’s 50 Best Web Sites and one of the American Library Association’s 30 Best Free Reference Sources on the Web.

Check out all the incredible partners who will be distributing Project You on their blogs and contributing to our magazine this year! Check out www.ProjectYouMagazine. com as more of our partners are featured! ✽ All Kids Are Celebs is a new website that features the child in your life. All Kids Are Celebs is a place for you to talk about the accomplishments and the funny things the child in your life says and does. All children are celebrities in their own right. You no longer have to be born into the right family or be related to a famous person to be a celebrity. All Kids Are Celebrities is a website that stars your child. You write the story, submit it (with or without a photo) and we’ll post it for everyone to see ✽ Cinnamon Hollow Reviews is owned by a stay at home mom of 4 who is always on the lookout for product and services to help keep the household running smoothly. Our mission is to bring products to families that help make their life a little bit easier and a lot more fun.

✽ Obviously MARvelous is a site that combines the life and adventures of Mar, a funny, tattooed, outspoken wife and SAHM of 3 with awesome product reviews and giveaways!

✽ Joey Fortman, a Philadelphia radio & tv host is the founder of Real Mom Media. Her site Real Mom in the Media is all about her life as a mom while working in media. You’ll find everything from TV segments to tantrums. Joey is also co-founder of Moms On The Spot (www.MomsOnTheSpot. com - a video segment show) where she hits the streets with her partner Tara Bucci (www.BabyMommaBlog.com) to find out what moms really think about products, places and events. Safetly helmets included.

✽ Visit Los Angeles Mamma Blog for money saving tips, product reviews, and musings on all things baby and toddler related.

✽ Linda Grant is the founder and editor of NycSingleMom.com where she writes about her adventures raising her adopted daughter in downtown New york City.

✽ Have U Heard is a family friendly website that provides the latest in celebrity, entertainment news website. Have U Heard is the go to place for the latest in pop culture news, television previews and recaps.

✽ GayNYCDad.com is a review and personal blog about navigating parenting in NYC with an active public school attending child, who also serves as an assistant blogger!

✽ Skimbaco Lifestyle by lifestyle expert Katja Presnal, offers inspiration to live life to the fullest from latest trends to healthy living. Skimbaco means enjoying life in the moment, it is your modern carpe diem.

To become a Project You Partner, please email us at ProjectYouMagazine@gmail.com.

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Mama Drama

How can you volunteer when one class mom is a control freak? By Danielle Feigenbaum

Danielle Feigenbaum, former a Television Marketing and Promotion Executive at CBS and ABC Networks, joins Role Mommy and Project You as a regular contributor. Danielle lives in Westchester with her husband, Andrew and their two kids - daughter Alexa, 6 and son Jordan, 3. 32

A Role Mommy Magazine l Back AT School 2011

e all have “mama drama,” unless of And I’m trying to keep up. Can’t I at least get course you’re the mama causing the some credit for that? Not in my town….one time drama. You know the type -- the wom- I brought in cupcakes and ripped off the price en who walk around like they rule the school, the tag (accidentally ripping off the ingredients as carpool lane and the PTA – and make you feel like well). You would have thought I handed my you’re back in grade school yourself. mama drama a bomb. hey were handed right I have been very active at my kid’s nursery back to me with a “we can’t serve these withschool and am even the President of the PTA out knowing what’s in them and if nuts came this year. However, when my daughter got to in contact with them!” Whoops. I swear I read elementary school, I found it very difficult the ingredients before I bought them but to get involved. There were groups of Ms. Drama wouldn’t believe me. moms who had been at the school for I think it is easy to get discouryears (with their older kids), and they aged and just give up. But stay the seemed to have a monopoly on everycourse, my fellow mom comrades in RoleMommy.com thing. Nor did they seem super welarms. There ARE nice, welcoming coming to new suggestions. Nobody moms out there. In fact, I’m making told me cliques don’t end when you it my mission this year to forget all the grow up! mama drama situations of the past and You’d think everyone would be happy to have help out at my kid’s schools, whether they want more volunteers and extra help, but I didn’t find me to or not. that to be the case. It started early in the school Here, some tips from this mom warrior on how year, when we received a supply list for a class to make the journey less dramatic: holiday party. It said to e-mail the head class ● Take the high road. Keep trying to volunteer, parent (who couldn’t remember my name after even if they are trying to keep you out. Eventumeeting me five-plus times), to let her know ally they should cave. what we were bringing. I immediately went out ● Meditate. Yoga can do wonders for your stress and bought 50 colorful spoons for the party and level and make you feel better about yourself at less than 24 hours later, e-mailed the head class the same time. parent -- as instructed – only to be stonewalled ● Kill em with kindness. How about inviting with the response: “We are already set with ev- one of “those moms” for a cup of coffee? What’s erything on the list.” Really?! Did I somehow the worse that can happen? Even if they say no, enter The Twilight Zone? at least you tried! Or how about all the crazy food issues? I’m ● If all else fails; wear ear plugs. When they fortunate my kids don’t have food allergies so I are speaking to you, just smile and nod. It will admit I’m not as hyper aware about all the food come in handy when your kids start to get whinrestrictions. But I am as diligent as I can be. ey too! ■

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A Role Mommy Magazine l Back AT School 2011

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A Role Mommnye Magazi Fall 2010

Back AT School Issue

Tea wiTh “NaNNy McPhee”

When YOUR Kid is the Bully

Energy Zappers —and Solutions