The Prospector In-Depth (11/29/2010)

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F R i E N D S H i P

“Friendship is like a gold mine, you have to keep digging in order to find what is truly valuable to you. ” – akshay suggula, 11 “Reminiscing about the past reminds me of the great friendships i have had that make my memories unique.” – tabitha yuen 10 “Interconnections allow people to relate through common interests and goals, further enhancing the interpersonal desire to divulge and reach those goals and interests.” – albab noor, 12 “Every friendship starts with trust, and is sustained with sacrifices” – martin nguyen, 10

“No matter how hard you fight or how much stuff you put your friends through, they will always be by your side.” – christina huang, 9 “Deep down in my heart, I love my friends.” – alex iwagaki, 11

“Strengthen true connections between individuals, so they can work through high school with the mutual support of others.”

– osker lu, 10 “Having friends is like having marbles, they roll with you everywhere.” – brendan boon 11

“Irreplaceable; friendship and relationships are the most precious things in life” – sam lee, 10 “Parts of your life will have you looking in the mirror not knowing who you are anymore, for those moments look to your friends and find out your true identity.” – mustafa arshad, 12

COMPILED BY ABHISHEK ZAVERI


in-depth

Friendship

THE PROSP

It's more than just a ten letter word

T

hat one guy who discovered electricity said, “We must hang together, or surely we shall hang separately.” Ben Franklin was not wrong. A friendship is a relationship built on trust and common interests, which will hopefully lead to an understanding of another person over time. If nothing else, it gives us someone to look for during brunch. Through the struggles and triumphs in life, we learn who our real friends are. The friends that stick around play important roles in our lives, while other friends come and go. Nowadays, friendships can take many forms. A BFF, also known as a Best Friend Forever, is a person that you can trust under any circumstances. A BFF will be there to cheer you on from the stands at a soccer game, tell you if green makes you look fat, or come to rescue you from deep distress. Being a Best Friend Forever also is a solid commitment to everlasting friendship.

A frenemy, a combination of friend and enemy, is defined just as the word suggests, an enemy disguised as a friend. Examples may include Paris Hilton and Nicole Riche or Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. Frenemies are two people who pretend to care for one another and fail to mention their ulterior motives. On the other hand, a bromance is when two guys love and value each other and are not afraid to show it. ‘Bros’ will always have each others’ backs and keep their best interests in mind. At the end of the day, when all problems seem neverending and when it feels like the world is coming down upon us, we turn to whomever we have: A friend or foe, anyone who can lend an ear and a shoulder when we need it most. COMPILED BY NATASHA SHARMA

Bromance: It’s more than it seems VANI MULKAREDDY in-depth editor

Bromance, a term coined from “brother” and “romance”, defines a new type of friendship - an unusually close relationship between two or more male friends. Hollywood has taken part in popularizing the term through hit TV shows such as Friends, which shows the amazingly tight and comedic bond between Joey, Chandler and Ross. However, Hollywood has not stopped there. Movies including Star Trek, Superbad, Good Will Hunting, Wedding Crashers and I Love You Man all portray the close friendship between two men. However, bromance isn’t just an eccentric Hollywood fantasy. It’s a real life trend that has taken over many male relationships. Seniors Nat Alzofon and Isaac Goes portray the typical bromance. Having met their freshman years through mutual friends, they have been best friends ever since. The two friends do practically everything together, from rock climbing to grabbing lunch and even teacher aiding. “A bromance is not any ordinary relationship. It’s like a brotherhood, in a sense. You have complete trust in your brother. In a way you kind of become the person,” said Alzofon. However, their relationship is not the ordinary male friendship. Both have completely different tastes in all aspects. For instance, Goes watches shows such as the Office, while Alzofon watches the Discovery channel.

Goes listens to bands like the Clash and Wu-Tang, while Alzofon listens to artists like Bob Dylan. The two also have opposing personalities, Goes is more outgoing and artistic; Alzofon on the other hand is more mellow and quiet. Yet, despite their clashing personalities and differences the boys still maintain their friendship. Goes and Alzofon have a relationship where communication does not necessarily mean words, gestures, or expressions. ““I think after being friends for such a long time, we just know what each other is thinking. In any situation, I will always know how Nat is feeling or his reaction or answer to a question or statement”, said Goes Their way of communication makes arguments quite predictable. “It’s really funny when we get into an argument, because most of the time I will know what Isaac will say,” said Nat. However, the few times they do get into a heated argument they immediately know when they have crossed the line. This is due to the endless amount of time the two friends spend together. Besides from the time they spend together at school with their friends, they spend hours together after school and on the weekends. “As cliché as it sounds we are like carrots and peas. We might be completely different, but we complement each other,” explained Alzofon. To the two, life without each other seems unimaginable. “I would be a different person without Nat,” said Goes. Their close and unusual relationship typifies the bromance. When asked to sum up their relationship and bromance, both boys simply said “Bro”.


DECEMBER 3, 2010

PECTOR

CHS Speaks Up: Freshmen feelings towards friendship While the high school environment is inviting to friendships in all grades, it is the school’s younger population that meets the most new people. As freshmen slide into the midst of the high school community, they quickly learn that no matter how intimidating their peers may appear to be, friendship is inevitable.

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When it comes to making friends, I just go for it; it doesn’t matter who they are or what school they’re from. FRESHMAN Samantha Tam Friendships? They just happen. FRESHMAN Ken Kudo

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I don’t feel nervous at all talking to new people; I just go up to them and introduce myself. FRESHMAN John Lau

I was really nervous the first couple days in high school, but being in band really helps me meet people. FRESHMAN Irwin Hui COMPILED BY VICTORIA DUAN

Real Best Buddies need no vows Best Buddies club attempts self-destruction to create natural friendships

students] go out and have fun but my kids can’t just do that. My kids are so isolated in this center that they have a difficult time forming friendships, or any sort of social interactions for The vision of Best Buddies International is that matter. They look forward to Thursday… to “put Best Buddies out of business” and no, [They’ll say] ‘It’s Monday, best buddies in three that was not a typo. In fact, there is actually days! Its Tuesday, best buddies in two days!’” much profundity in the organization aiming Rudy Alcala, a student from the learning for self-termination. Think about it this way: center, attests to Thursday being his favorite day in a perfect world, a club to spur friendships of the week. between special education students and genDuring the weekly lunch meetings, members eral education students would be unnecessary, spend time playing board games, reading books, but, as we all know, high school is not a perfect munching on food and just catching up with world. Unfortunately, kids with intellectual friends. or developmental disabilities face a constant Junior Zack Yuen remembers hanging out uphill climb when it comes to integrating into with his first buddy, Pravab: “We played board society. And this is where Best Buddies comes games all the time…time skills, cooking skills, into the picture. When integration becomes JAMIN SHIH daily activities, and lots of puzzles. We did the natural, they can step back out. BEST BUDDIES| Junior Krystal Allen and Alex Mock enjoy each other’s company as they same puzzle four times and never finished it. “Best Buddies Club is distinct from other chow down on food provided by the Best Buddies annual Thanksgiving Banquet. But it was all good - it was fun.” organizations such as the Gay-Straight Alliance Outside of its weekly meetings, Best Buddies holds Club: instead of preaching equality, it is based on acknowl- been before. many bonding events. Movie nights and bowling parties “[In the past] people would skip [meetings]. And this edging differences” said Junior Hong Suh. have been planned in the past and at the end of every year, The club advocates embracing these “differences” is your buddy - you can’t just ditch your friend like that. In there is a district wide pool party for special education kids through genuine friendship, creating a glimpse of the orga- outside friendships, you don’t just flake,” said Chang, “It is and their buddies. your responsibility. It is your commitment. We are trying nization’s vision within our high school. Alcala talks about his first friend, Michael, and how Considering that the number of peer buddies far ex- to stress that this year.” they used to hang out outside the club as well. Michael Droppo, who has been the Best Buddies club advisor ceeds the number of special education students this year, once took him to the San Jose Toy Show Convention. the club is definitely expanding its sphere. In fact, Club for the last five years, said, “I don’t think that the general “That’s the goal of the club, to actually have real friendpresident Maria Chang and adviser Laura Droppo both education students realize just how much of an impact ships,” explained Droppo, “You shouldn’t need a meeting believe that the club is stronger this year than it ever has they have on my students. All of [the general education to have a friend.” SINDHU GNANASAMBANDAN sports assistant

WILLIE WANG


in-depth

DECEMBER 3, 2010

There is no GPS in friendship Three friends battle distance to maintain friendship

EMILY CHENG

They will raid your refrigerator, eat all your food, and make themselves at home.

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They have borrowed half of your wardrobe, including underwear.

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They will push you in the pool when you tell them not to.

They are not afraid to tell you that you got a little something in your nose or that you’re starting to sprout a mustache.

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to te of is ta dle i. he id y h n’t he m o sa o t tt w ey u in t jus h T l yo gh i l ca e n th NG

They know all your flaws but they still love you the same.

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If you’re walking together and it starts to rain, he/she will take your umbrella from you and tell you to run.

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They will trip you and laugh, help you up, then trip you again.

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They show no shame to fart in your presence.

Every valuable friendship always begins by crossing into the unfamiliar territory of a stranger’s world. In no time, what seems to be just small-talk blossoms into a fun-filled and mutual friendship. These friendships are common among everyone, be it students, teachers, or staff members at school. Mrs. Yukari Kawano and Mrs. Belinda Olson are, much like many students, a prime example of those who found a close connection by simple interaction at school. A friendship can start in almost any place at any time, such as at sports competitions, volunteering events, bonding activities and clubs. Kawano and Olson are no exception, for they bonded by competing together in a popular tournament: the South Bay Area volleyball league. Kawano, who was interested in starting the volleyball team, recruited many staff members, including Olson. “We ended up with a very random, very fun team composed of all kinds of teachers.” said Kawano. Kawano and Olson found a common ground though their quirky similarities, just as we do with our friends. Kawano said, “[Mrs. Olson] brought her fiance, and I brought my boyfriend [to the tournament]. They had similar comments, world views -” “ - and behavioral tendencies!” Olson interjected. “Both of our husbands were very similar, which helped us get along”. With an intimate bond, the two continued participating in many activities together,

just as students engage in regular after school hang outs. On the Friday before Halloween, students and staff members had the opportunity to dress up. Kawano and Olson wore matching pajamas, consisting of a purple one-piece covered in cartoon owls, knee-high socks and dog-shaped sandals, making a bold appearance as two close buddies. Their simple shared interests also branched out into a deeper, more emotional areas of their friendship. Both of them were experiencing the ups-and-downs of newlywed life and discovered that their ordeals were similar. As a result, their companionship grew extremely supportive. “I could sit down and talk to Mrs. Olson about my marriage,” said Kawano. “We lean on each other for strength.” Their combined supportive energy was later channeled to Challenge Day. Both were coordinators of the event and they constantly kept in touch with each other in their motivation to spread the friendship they have found in each other. Kawano and Olson admit that their friendship is relatively new compared to those of other teachers on campus. However, the lack of historical longevity is more than compensated for by personal and close memories they have created together. Like many friends, Kawano and Olson started out unacquainted with each other, but became a unique pair with steadfast support for one another. Their bond is a testament of the valuable life experiences that arise from getting involved with the common yet overlooked details in life.

Below are 10 indicators of friendship. How many apply to the relationship between you and your best friend?

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EMILY CHENG features assistant

10 things to describe a 10 letter word, friendship

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Educators Kawano and Olson pursue a friendship outside of the staff room

Put your friendship to the test

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Buddies after the studies

ence and increase our efforts if we want our friendship to survive. We realize that we will never lose Roee, but if we don’t try, he might lose us. When Roee first left, we thought that the best part of life was over. Time would just stand still until he finally came back. Sadly, life rolls on. Weekends fly by without notice, school bells signal the end of classes and suns set, but Roee’s absence is constant. To fill the void, to make it seem like Roee is still here, we have to reciprocate, remember and work to maintain our friendship. It doesn’t matter whether we are 7,700 miles apart and struggling to overcome a ten hour time difference, for the three of us will always be friends and do whatever is necessary to prolong this friendship. Losing a couple hours of sleep just to continue our weekly video chats is nothing compared to seeing his face, hearing his laugh and exchanging our stories. Friendship is worth the sacrifices. This is true friendship, and we hope that it will prosper. We know that one day when he finally returns, it will be as if time actually did stand still: we will be back on the wooden benches in front of the library, eating cookies and joking around as if he had never left.

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We sat on the wooden benches in front of the Cupertino Library with our makeshift picnic of cookies, ice cream and Chicken in a Biscuit, knowing that this would be one of the last times the three of us would be within such proximity. It was not a sad moment, but rather a moment tinged with hope that our friendship would endure. Because of circumstances we could not control and opportunities we could not deny him, Roee Bokobza, former Cupertino High School student, was moving to Israel, 7,700 miles away. “My parents decided that they wanted my brothers and me to be closer to our heritage,” said Roee. “Here in Israel, I am with my whole family - I rarely got to see them before. Some days I feel great, but most days I am angry at my parents for making such life-changing decisions for me,” said Roee. After learning there was only a couple of months before Roee

They call your parents Mom and Dad.

JACKIE BREUER in-depth editor ALYA OMAR news assistant

would leave, the three of us realized that the only thing that we could control was our friendship and its durability. Regardless of the 7,700 miles separating us, our friendship would persist and grow stronger. But life got in the way. The two of us are so busy and so caught up in our own lives and petty obligations that we forget, and it scares us. We let days slip by with no contact with someone we used to rely on a daily basis less than a year ago. It is this heartbreaking void and you notice it most when we stop and realize that something important is missing. There’s this sting that sinks into you when you realize that what’s missing is Roee. It’s the absence of that friend whose hug you fit into and whose laugh is so contagious. However, we are thankful Roee is so proactive in taking the initiative to keep in touch. He has the strength and desire to keep our friendship alive. He insists on maintaining contact, whether it is video-chatting at 12:30 a.m. or reading random text messages during the day. It is when we forget to reciprocate that it hurts the most. Roee is one of the most understanding, forgiving and unconditionally loving human beings, and we take it for granted. We know that we need to work around the ten-hour time differ-


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