Console magazine Beta test by Gareth Seiler

console Issue 1 October 2008 Yes itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s free

Video Game Culture What do gamers care about besides games? Are you a gamescore whore?

Licenced Games

Will they always be terrible, Do they have a future?

The Latest Stuff

From the latest gadgets to to the most obscure fan parafanlia

The BETA Issue

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Eds letter Welcome to

console

Consle is different, don’t expect to read the same things between these pages that you see in every other gaming magazine or on any other gaming news site or blog. Console is about gaming culture, the things that are important to us as gamers. If you beleive the above statement then we might have a problem already, No seriously. starting magazine especially one aimed at El in avel iusto consequam, quamet adipisim your peersnulputem is not a easy task. We would really vulput iustie commodiam, sit aci likeer toiurem beleivedolor that we are creating some differat. Igna faccumsandre doent unique content in this magazine but it only lorting euguer il duis nis ad dunt in henim stats with us, as the readers you yourself will playdoluptat. a important part in dictating and shaping the content to come, Tell us what you want to to less the first Console free weekly seeWelcome more of, ofissue andofwhat youthe think weve ezine that covers gaming culture tv tech and movies. done well or what we royaly screwed up and we Weve got a ton of great stuff for you this month will take your critism or praise to heart and work harder

r contents

Who are we?

Uncle Corpse

He may eat spleen for breakfast but we also found him pretty darn usefull at soving problems only a gamer could face.

teh Poddle

He who PWNS all seems to have found some time in hios busy day of pwnage to share his thoughts on gamers and the stange things

Feature Coloums

PG 001 Uncle corpse tackles a strange fetish that we must admit weve never come accross before, then again, that’s proably a good thing.

PG 001 Girly games are crap, TT ask developers why they seem to think games like cooking mama are a good idea. PG 001 The looser tells us why he thinks most movie and tv tie in games are crap, but he still likes them.

PG 001 Girly games are crap, TT ask developers why they seem to think games like cooking mama are a good idea.

When shes not owning us at gears of war or Call of duty 4. She’s letting us see gaming from a womans perspective.

The loser

Not much to be siad about him really. He sucks at games and he sucks at life. I think that about sums it up.

PG 001 Gamescore, is it really worth it. Poddle puts achievements, trophies and everything else to the sword.

PG 001 Girly games are crap, TT ask developers why they seem to think games like cooking mama are a good idea.

The ED

The one that keep the rest in check, ok that’s a lie. But lets just beleive it for now shall we.

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Console October Beta Issue

PG 001 The looser tells us why he thinks most movie and tv tie in games are crap, but he still likes them.

PG 001 The looser tells us why he thinks most movie and tv tie in games are

PG 001 The looser tells us why he thinks most movie and tv tie in games are crap, but he still likes them.

contents

o 6 TT-25

broken controler

o broken controler

UnsafestCorpse replies…

With the price of the Xbox 360 Arcade dropping to R1700, now might be the time to consider buying your wife her own console. Maybe this could be the perfect Christmas gift. Then she will be able to play Bomberman whenever she wants to and you’ll be able to get more console time to try and beat her high score!

Br Uncle corpse does his best to offer solutions to your problems, weather you take his advice or not make speak volumes for your personaly sanity

o C k

e tr n

r bomberman addiction Sir Reaver the 1st asks…

im just here to help you Broken Controller is Console vice column that tackles the issues faced by avid gamers. If you have a problem please email unsafestcorpse@gmail.com.

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Console October Beta Issue

magazines adeveryday social

Dear AuntieCorpse, I have a problem in that my wife is addicted to Bomberman. On the one hand, its crappy coz she will often simply take over my console for hours on end. On the other hand, if you were to look at my Xbox live profile, my Bomberman ranking is abso-frigging-lutely awesome! So what do I do? Sacrifice bragging rights for more console time?

There may be others ways you can capitalize on your wife’s Bomberman addiction. Why not hire some Bomberman costumes that you can wear in the bedroom to add extra spice to your love life!

Finding balance Unknown Gamer asks…

Dear AuntieCorpse I have a problem with not spending enough time with my loved one. We both have different game genres we like playing and our friends are not the same. My night goes like this, get home moan about my day, make supper spend some time together then I am off to my worst half my Xbox and that’s where I stay for the night. Once or twice a week we play something together, but feel this is not enough. But I can’t seem to pull myself away from the online experience. How do I balance the two out? UnsafestCorpse replies…

It is vital in any relationship that both parties have an opportunity for quality ‘me’ time. But it feels like you are worried that both of you are becoming absorbed in two separate gaming world’s. You are obviously a sensitive person who cares very

Beyond Help Anonymous asks…

Dear Uncle Corpse I am a little embarrassed and do not know who to talk about my problem, so I am turning to you. I have been a gamer for 18 years and enjoy both console and PC gaming. I particularly enjoy games where I have to shoot lots of people. I have recently become engrossed in online gaming and have lots of friends in the virtual world. My problem is I have an overwhelming urge to push my Xbox 360 controller up my bum. Is this normal? Please Help!

UnsafestCorpse replies…

Thank you for your email. I know it must have been hard for you to open up about your problem. Unless you have an anal sphincter the size of a clowns pocket I would not recommend trying to insert your Xbox 360 controller into your rectum. Even with copious amounts of lubricant it is highly unlikely that you will be successful. Try to take you mind off this desire by focusing on attempting to top local leader boards by beating your friends high scores in online games. But, if your impulse becomes all consuming go out and by yourself…….. a Wii. The Wii Remote will fit into your anus far more easily than an Xbox 360 controller. Just make sure you use lots of lubricant and cover it in a condom. After all, once you’ve had your fun, your friends and family still have to use the Wii Remote. It’s all part of being a responsible gamer.

tech and gadgets feature

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lol noob

GamerScore

Is it really worth it? Caption to go in here

lol noob is a coloum by our resident ownzor and destroyer of all, Poddle, where he laments on the many issues that face gamers.

asual gamers tend to not care weather their score is zero, or a million. If an indication comes up on the screen notifying them of the achievement, they will say something like “Well that’s nice” and carry on playing. Then you get the gamers who will chase achievements in reach… They might browse the list of conditions and go for the easy ones to up their gamer score a few hundred points or ad to their trophy list. Lastly we come to our “gamer score whores”. These are the gamers who will stop at PG 006

Console October Beta Issue

nothing to up their points. Before a game comes out, they check out the achievements online before-hand to prepare themselves for what they must do to get a 100% completion for maximum

On their own acievments appear to have bred a completely different brand of gamer.

score. The hardcore will buy any new game and not play anything else until they have milked all those points dry! You may be saying to your-

self right now, “I knew all of that already” but the reason I’m writing this article is to ask why? Is it really worth it? All the time, the inevitable frustration, and the money spent on games the player must be well aware are not very good. Some of the Achievements out there require you to spend hours in multiplayer racking up kills, or doing specific things for a few points here or there. Or in single player, to play the game multiple times to get that little boost. Not only that but there also seems to be a trend for developers to add achievements that have hardware re-

quirements such as the photo achievements in burnout that require the live vision camera. I’m sure some developers have also figured out by now that if they make the achievements in their games easy to get, even if they release a sub par experience there is another reason people may buy their game. Maybe its not coincidence that a lot of the more well know “gamer score whore” titles out there aren’t that great. I understand with some games that it’s worth playing the game several times, but then you get games where there is absolutely no point to carry on, except for the score. Unfortunately here in South Africa we can’t play ranked games, unless you don’t mind the 1 second of lag, you’re just that good or the latency just doesn’t bother you, but reading forums and blog posts online, many multiplayer experiences are ruined by achievements. You will always

have someone who is not in the game to have fun, but rather just in it for the achievements. The developers are partly to blame for this, but it’s also the way players go about getting these achievements. Such as get 100 kills with this certain weapon. A player looking to get said achievement will obviously use nothing but that weapon, and try get that many kills as soon as possible, and this ruins the gaming experience for everyone else. Especially if you’re on their team, because although you are playing the game for

On their own acievments appear to have bred a completely different brand of gamer.

fun, no one likes it when a member of your team is off doing his own thing, most of the fun we have in multiplayer games is playing with your team-mates and sharing the experience. You are not your gamer score! I understand that you get your truly hardcore gamers who love getting 100% completion rate in

TOP 5 BEST GAMES TO MILK FOR GAMESCORE

PGR 4

CRACKDOWN

UNO

TOMB RAIDER LEGEND

Caption to go in here

BURNOUT PARADISE

the game, but they generally only get a game if they know that they are going to enjoy it, and have fun getting the score out of it. Is it really worth putting yourself through a below average game that is un-enjoyable with bad graphics and broken controls and that requires you to play through it multiple times? Well some gamers out there think so. They may make justifications as to why they play the games, they will tell you that they actually enjoyed playing superman cause the flying was fun, but at the end of the day, we know and they know that the only reason those games ever touched the tray of their console was to up their gamer score or add one more trophy to their collection. That however is an outsiders view, what really goes on in the heads of some of these gamers we may never know. One thing however can be siad maybe these gamerscore whores are infact the new hardcore of our gaming comunity, as much as we would like to beleive they are just in it for the “glory” or the bragging rights theres no denying that the gamers that top the lsites must have some serious skills. It’s no easy feat to finish Call of Duty on verteran or Ninja gaiden 2 on it’s hardest difficulty. The guys who are over 100000 points on Xbox Live are elite players theres no doubt there. We got a chance to speak to the highest ranked South African “RainKing” and he may have opened our eyes to what really makes a person chase gamerscore or trophies.

rainking interview

OCTOBER 24, 2008 WWW.ROCKSTARGAMES.COM/MIDNIGHTCLUBLA

COMING TO THE PSP® (PLAYSTATION® PORTABLE)

© 2008 Rockstar Games, Inc. Rockstar Games, the Rockstar Games r logo, Midnight Club Los Angeles, Midnight Club L.A. Remix, the Midnight Club Los Angeles logo and the Midnight Club L.A. Remix logo are trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Take-Two Interactive Software, Inc. “ ” and “PLAYSTATION” are registered trademarks of Sony Computer Entertainment Inc. “Blu-ray Disc” and “Blu-ray Disc” logo are trademarks and/or registered trademarks. “ ”, “PlayStation” and “ ” are trademarks or registered trademarks of Sony Corporation. Microsoft, Xbox, Xbox LIVE and the Xbox logos are trademarks of the Microsoft group of companies and are used under license from Microsoft. All other marks and trademarks are properties of their respective owners. All rights reserved.

Fracture review

I’m not about to butter up fracture only to smear it all over the ground. The game is derivative and it is apparent from the get go, what i will say in it’s defense is in this day and age it’s becoming really hard tio find any game that doesnt borrow heavily from one or another. It’s not thats theres no originality out there, it’s more a case of developers giving players more of what they liked. Fracture is very much a game with a gimmick, the terraforming ofcourse, for those of you who may have let thius game slip by and dont know much about it, is all about deforming and re-forming the terrain. While that gimmick works well, and does serve well as a iniitial hook, Fracture never does enough to make you want to continue.

Fracture review

The Prequel to the award winning S.T.A.L.K.E.R – Shadows of Chernobyl

Fracture review and comp

No more Familiar routes through the Zone,... No more rules you used to live with...

What awaits you,

S.t.a.l.k.e.r.,

IN THE ZONE THAT CHANGED?

STREET DATE: 5TH SEPTEMBER TBC

lazygamer

brothers in arms review

brothers in arms comp

brothers in arms ad

Gears of War 2v2 tourn

xx needs a name

needs a name

If you can't beat them

join

them!

The looser atempts to make you beleive what he has to say is actually worth reading, we doubt it, continue at your own risk.

Look its a review for Super Princess Peach DS

I am sure most girls reading this have picked up a controller in their lifetime and played some sort of game. But if you are in a relationship with a gamer I am almost certain you have had some sort of argument that they play too much!! Well in this Generation of Gaming more and more girls are joining this wonder-

ful community of gaming. So now is your chance to beat them in they’re on game!!! Games for Girls are growing and they are making some awesome titles that are fun and easy to play. This “Girls” section will be there for you to read about titles that are worth playing.

Super Princess Peach was an enjoyable game, craftily designed and excellently executed. Peach is cute, there is simply no other word for it after all Pink is the new Black. It’s definitely a girly game, relatively simple and just fun to play. We are all used to Princess Peach been the one that is rescued by Mario. But in this game Princess Peach is our heroin and she does it in style. You Go Girl!! Not far away from the Mushroom Kingdom lies Vibe Island, hiding place of the Vibe Scepter. Bowser unearths this mystical device and uses its strange powers to capture Mario and his friends. Princess Peach was fortunate enough to have been out when the raid happened, but upon hearing of Mario’s fate she vows to save her friends. She sets off to Vibe Island, armed only with a talking umbrella name Perry.

There are eight stages that Princess Peach must clear before she can enter Bowser’s Castle. The first stage, Ladida Plains, is a simple stage, which basically teaches you the controls and how to play the game. The controls are pretty straightforward. In each stage there are three toads to be rescued and players clear the stage by reaching the goal, where the game will save automatically. You can clear a stage without saving all the toads, but be warned that if you do not save every single toad on every level in every stage you will not be able to enter Bowser’s Castle. If you had missed one toad it now means that you have to go back into that level and search for him, i.e. the game requires 100% completion before you can face Bowser and save Mario. Maybe to some this would not be a big deal, but this was downright annoying to me

Look its a review for Super Princess Peach DS

needs a name There are two vital things to understand in this game: HP and Vibe Gauge. The HP represents Peach’s health points. When these run out Peach dies and players will return to the menu screen. Peach will lose HP by bumping into an enemy or being hit by an enemy attack. HP are represented by a bar filled with hearts in the top left hand corner of the top screen. Just below this bar you will see the Vibe Gauge, which represents how much Vibe Peach has available. She cannot perform her special abilities without Vibe and her abilities will run for longer if she has lots of Vibe and vice versa. You can grab crystals or absorb enemies with Perry to fill your Vibe Gauge. Peach’s vibes are joy, rage, gloom and calm.

needs a name Pros

Look its a review for Super Princess

Overall it’s a very enjoyable game. It’s not too difficult, so the chances of you tossing your DS in pure anger is not likely. There are so many factors that make this game cute and I recommend you play the game and enjoy the DS Capabilities. A nice little extra in the game is the Shopping Section (Yes Girls we get to SHOP) Players can access the shop by pressing R1 on the title screen or the menu by pressing L1. In the shop players can purchase abilities, puzzle pieces, as well as music from the various levels and mini-games. Look out for these while playing though because these can be collected throughout the game. But should you happen to be missing one piece of a puzzle, you can purchase it in the shop. In the menu screen you can play the mini-game which you have unlocked, assemble puzzles (provided you have all the pieces) and listen to songs that you have unlocked.

Look its a review for Super Princess

There are a few annoying factors in this game, One which I mentioned before having to collect every single toad before you can finish the game. Second of all, if Peach dies during a level you have to go to the beginning of the level and start over again. Some levels can be quite challenging. So making one mistake, and Peach dies, can be very annoying.

Look its a review for Super Princess

Princess Peach running with her skirt pulled up a bit with sounds of “wee wee” is really quite humorous. Players can use joy when they need Peach to fly or cause a cyclone. Rage will surround Peach with flames, enabling her to melt ice and burn wooden bridges. Peach will start crying if you touch her gloom vibe, which can be used to put out fires or make sprouts grow. Finally, use her calm vibe if you need to fill her HP. The vibes do add a lot to the game, each vibe will illustrate Peach’s emotions accompanied with cute little tunes. The sight of Princess Peach running with her skirt pulled up a bit with sounds of “wee wee” is really quite humorous. Tip: If you ever get stuck in this game, using one of her vibes will help you progress. Each stage will have a boss at the end of it. The bosses range from Petey Piranha to Giant Kamek to King Boo. Nintendo has certainly designed the game to help the player along the way, Before each boss fight you have a level where it almost gives you the

Cons

r i'm lost

Licensed Games

Will we ever see a good one?

The looser atempts to make you beleive what he has to say is actually worth reading, we doubt it, continue at your own risk.

I haven’t been gaming for that long but ever since I can remember there have only been a handful of good licensed games. I use the term “good” loosely because the good ones aren’t great but they do get away with being fun and they don’t make me want to throw my control though a wall.. A lot of licensed games have their share of faults but most of them just fail in a,most every department. As a matter of fact I would go as far as to say that 95% of licensed game are terrible. Why is this? There are various reasons in my opinion that leads to these

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games just not living up to expectations. The number one reason being money. The development is generaly rushed so that the game is released the same day that the movie is released. this leads to bugs being missed, less graphics passes, and at the end of the day less of a solid game. The other reason could be that most of the time these games are developed by “lesser” studios and are therefore not on par with other AAA titles, this is not true all the time though and even the big studios, if rushed can turn out a turd. I can’t compile a total list

of what goes wrong or doesnt in the developement of these games as I’ve never been in a developement house. But is is without doubt obvious that these games are not being made in ideal conditions. What does concern me is that, People will buy these games expecting the same experience they got from the movie or television show. We all want them to be the best games ever, especially if we are fond of the license being used but we need to understand that film and games are not the same thing, making a film interactive and

tuning the story and experience to rely on input from the player can be a daunting task. At the end of the day we play games to have fun, licenced games however have the extra burnden of having to mimick the content and the experience of the sorce material. Take for example “The Bourne Conspiracy”. It was a good game with innovative new ideas and fun gameplay but it did have it’s faults. The quicktime events may have been over used and the game never left you feeling like you were ever actually in full controll. We all look for something in each game play. For example, I always try to find my inner superhero when playing games. If a game has flying or special powers I will usually get it whether it’s good or bad. Take Superman Returns, to most people it was really repetitive and boring and it got really low review scores, but I really liked it. Why? To me it was fun. The flying was really well done and I could spend hours just flying around the city. There are others too. Ironman the game was really fun for me although it had it’s faults, but again, I really enjoyed the flying. Lost on the other hand had no flying but I really liked that too. It was a decent adventure game that really gave you the “Lost” feeling while playing. I’ve played almost all of the Spiderman games and they also provided me with enough FUN to finish each game. Then you get a game like The Simpsons – Of all the licensed games I played this was probably my favourite. It was like playing an interactive

episode of The Simpsons. It played great, looked exactly like a Simpsons episode and it was really funny. When I stand back there is a reason the Simpsons was so good though, it was really more fan service than anything else, it didnt have to meet a deadline to match a theatre release and it had it’s own unique strory line not linked directly to a season or movie, and that right there is the key. The main problem as I stated erlier is that licenced games about movies etc are tied down from the begining, theres no room to play with things as a developer cause if you do youll get slammed for not matching the movie or show content and if you stick with it directly you run into numerous problems trying to create the same experiences in an interactive form. The later in my opinion being games like King Kong, Eragon and Transformers. These gamthey are all based on movies and all released at the same time as their big screen counterparts. These games do their best to stick as close to the movies as possible and all fail as games in the process. I’ll admit, I finished King Kong and Eragon but that was purely for the gamerscore and it was hell playing to the end. Im left with a somewhat bitter taste in my mouth after playing these games, im not sure weather these developers really tried to give me the best experience possible or if they just cashed in on my love for the movie. As much as I would like to beleive the former, I’m pretty sure we all know the real

I'm lost

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