9 minute read
FEATURE STORY
KINDNESS:
Let’s Make It More Contagious Than COVID
By Erin Pittman, Editor in Chief
In my writing career, I’ve been taught to put a positive slant on things whenever you can, and I’m usually successful, as I tend to look on the bright side of most things anyway. But 2020, and its remnants that have spilled over into 2021, continue to challenge me. It’s pretty tough to put a positive slant on a pandemic. Sure, there have been some lovely silver linings — more time at home with family, appreciation for what we have, even greater gratitude for our medical professionals and first responders, and so on. But none of it balances out the suffering and loss we have faced in the past year and continue to see.
The only thing I find that begins to bring some balance to today’s world is kindness. No, kindness can’t eradicate COVID19 and it can’t recreate jobs lost, but it can soothe emotions and bring about moments of happiness in a tough time.
The Effects of Kindness
There have been numerous studies about the positive effects of kindness on those performing the acts. Participants in several studies reported greater happiness when spending money on others than on themselves, for example. According to a publication out of Dartmouth University, “Witnessing acts of kindness produces oxytocin, occasionally referred to as the ‘love hormone’ which aids in lowering blood pressure and improving our overall heart-health. Oxytocin also increases our self-esteem
Performing acts of kindness stimulates serotonin, decreases stress and reduces pain. In her book Raising Happiness; In Pursuit of Joyful Kids and Happier Parents, Author Christine Carter reports, “People who volunteer tend to experience fewer aches and pains. Giving help to others protects overall health twice as much as aspirin protects against heart disease. People 55 and older who volunteer for two or more organizations have an impressive 44% lower likelihood of dying early, and that’s after sifting out every other contributing factor, including physical health, exercise, gender, habits like smoking, marital status and many more. This is a stronger effect than exercising four times a week or going to church.”
Spread Kindness
Kindness and love are the foundations upon which we build relationships and strong communities. And kindness is definitely contagious — let’s make it more contagious than COVID. Amidst month 12 of this pandemic, join Prince William Living in shifting our focus to kindness and improve the health and happiness of ourselves and those around us. Here are some infectious ideas to get you started.
Kindness in Our Community
The pandemic has left few people untouched in major ways. Most people you know could likely use a boost. Try these ideas to spread kindness and generosity in our community.
Purge your home, and donate. We all have a closet or two — or a two-car garage — that’s too packed with belongings we no longer need. Clear out clothes, shoes, accessories and more, and donate them to a charity or shelter in need.
Help with food rescue delivery. Visit pwfoodrescue.org to learn about food rescue efforts in Prince William. Download the app and sign up to help out. Donate to food pantries. Maybe you don’t have time to transport food. Pick up some extra items during your next grocery trip and deliver them to a food pantry. Or make an online donation to ensure our neighbors don’t go hungry during these tough times.
Adopt or foster a shelter pet. Adopting from shelters or rescue groups saves lives. Search online for a pet that’s a good match for your family and save a life today. (This option, complete with pup kisses or cat snuggles, is also sure to raise your happiness levels day after day.) And if you are unable to commit to the lifetime of a pet right now, consider fostering!
Pay it forward. Little acts of kindness can turn someone’s day around. Pay the tab for the person behind you in the drivethrough line or cover a toll for the next car. Give an enormous tip on a small bill. Leave treats outside for delivery drivers. Perform a random act of kindness and create a domino effect.
Give grace to others. Perhaps your pickup order isn’t the hottest or tastiest you’ve had. Maybe the grocery cashier forgot to put one of your items in your bags, or your child’s teacher took three days to respond to your email. Give grace. Remember we are all coping with more than we ever thought we would, and those worries and stresses take up mental space — space we used to be able to use to bring our A games.
Help a local musician. Winter months in a pandemic don’t provide many opportunities for local musicians to earn income. Follow local artists on Facebook and tip during online concerts. Visit their websites and purchase merchandise. Every little bit helps.
Be considerate of our neighbors. Don’t be the toilet paper hoarder — or if you do find yourself with too many supplies, find someone who needs them to share them with. If stores are low on supply of certain items, only buy what you need. Call elderly neighbors before you head to the store and see if you can pick up something for them, or ask if they need a lift to appointments or to get their vaccine. Being aware of others’ needs goes a long way toward building community.
Kindness for Friends and Family
The days of 2020 were often filled with stress, and 2021 isn’t starting out any differently. While the faces we see when we get home are some of our favorites, we often have little patience and kindness left in our tanks to share with them. Be intentional about spreading kindness at home and with friends. It may take (continues on page 6)
a little mustering to find the energy for that 12th tea party of the week with your toddler, but you know after a few sips of that imaginary tea, you’ll be glad you powered through.
COVID times have also taught us how important social interaction is for (most) humans. Don’t let friends and family feel alone. Send those texts, plan those socially distanced driveway happy hours and make every effort to stay in touch with those you love.
Here are some ideas for spreading kindness to friends and family.
Call your mom. And your dad. Check in with parents and grandparents regularly. Even if you feel like you don’t have much to report on your life of staying home, reach out. This could be a time to learn about their childhoods or share favorite books. Get creative with ways to connect.
Send the texts. Many of us are guilty of responding to texts in our minds and forgetting to actually respond. Be intentional about replying to those who reach out to you. And reach out to those you haven’t heard from in a while. Send the latest social media meme for a laugh, or communicate only with GIFs. Sharing silliness and laughter is definitely kind.
Give people something to look forward to. Many of us have realized over the past year how important it is to have things on the calendar to look forward to. In a time when everything seems to be canceled, plan something for friends and family to be excited about. It can be a simple socially distanced scavenger hunt in the neighborhood or a backyard movie night with blankets and heaters. Just create a future event to count down to where you can safely connect with others.
Send little surprises. We’ve also realized that it doesn’t take much for us to get excited this year, right? Send little surprises to friends. Did you buy a great new herbal tea? Mail a few bags to your friend who’s always cold. Read a great book? Tuck a note inside about why you loved it and drop it on a friend’s porch. Is your best friend just completely frazzled? Send a digital food delivery card so she can simply order dinner for her family and cross cooking off her mile-long to-do list. Little acts of kindness have big impacts.
Kindness for Yourself
Sometimes the hardest person to be kind to is ourselves. It’s important right now not to apply pre-COVID rules and expectations to COVID times. Our brains are full of worries. We have to remember to take a mask everywhere. We have to check COVID policies for most anywhere we go. Our homes have become our offices and schools, and we’re juggling video conferences with clients while second grade PE is going on behind us. We ALL have a lot going on. Here are some options for pampering ourselves — or simply cutting ourselves some slack. Organize and beautify your space. Use some of your downtime to clear the clutter and add a touch of something that makes you smile. Redo your workspace and add a candle or fresh flowers. Clear out your clothes and treat yourself to a new top for your next virtual meeting. Organized spaces create calm within you.
Adopt a calming practice. If you’ve ever considered meditation or yoga, now would be a great time to give one a try. Both practices lower stress and blood pressure, create time just for you and help calm the endless mental chatter we carry around.
Get outside. Fresh air and sunshine boost both your immune system and your mood. Find time to get outdoors regularly. Bundle up and take a short walk. Shoot some hoops with your children. Play a round of golf or disc golf — whatever makes you happy. Physical and mental self-care are essential.
Actively forgive yourself. If you had big goals last year and you couldn’t achieve them because you’ve become the teacher and the lunch lady and now work from home, forgive yourself. If you’ve been snippier with your family because you’re just so tired of being told you can’t do things, forgive yourself. Make a list of everything that has you feeling bad, and LET IT GO. You’re busy surviving a pandemic. Almost everything is understandable these days.
Get help when you need it. Social isolation is real. Losing a job evokes fear and many emotions. Worrying over your children’s education this past year is heavy. Realize that you’re carrying around a lot and sometimes you need someone to help you with the lift. Find a friend or a counselor who can listen. Getting the support you need is the best way to show kindness to yourself.
So there you have it. Now run with these infectious ideas and make kindness more contagious than COVID. Our community is still an incredibly wonderful place to be.
Erin Pittman is a mom, wife, writer, editor, avid reader and lover of anything furry. You can reach her at epittman@princewilliamlliving. com.
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