QNotes March 31-April 13, 2012 by QnotesCarolinas

March 31-April 13 . 2012

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March 31-April 13 . 2012

inside March 31-April 13, 2012 Vol 26 No 24

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contributors this issue

O’Neale Atkinson, Paige Braddock, Rosendo Brown, Eva Hayward, Charlene Lichtenstein, Lainey Millen, Leslie Robinson, StatePoint Media, David Stout, Trinity

front page Graphic Design: Lainey Millen Photo Credit: Randell Whitworth, StillOut

only online Straight allies speak out for equality Interview with Hudson Taylor Dwellings: • Home decorating • Energy efficiency • Spring cleaning

a&e / life&style 5 10 10 11 12 15 16 17 18 18 19

20 Questions Dwellings: Gardens Dwellings: Curb Appeal On the Map Sports: Playing the field Dwellings: Organization Out in the Stars Tell Trinity Fabulance Jane’s World Q events calendar

news & features 6 News Notes: Regional Briefs 13 Gay It Forward launches

opinions & views 4 4 4 9 14

Editor’s Note General Gayety QPoll Transilluminations TalkBack

charlotteobserver.com/1166/ a local news partner of The Charlotte Observer

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March 31-April 13 . 2012

qnotes

VIEWS

editor’s note by o’neale atkinson oneale@goqnotes.com

Winter isn’t coming

VIEWS

What happened to winter? After living in South Carolina for the past 10 years, I was so excited at the prospect of a white winter for a change. I know I am not too far from my Columbia origin, but with being closer to the mountains, I just figured that seeing more than a dusting of snow was in my future. Oh, well, maybe next year, because spring seems to be here in full effect. Time to do some springcleaning, break out the lighter clothing and get out amongst the living! Speaking of getting back out amongst the living, this past weekend I returned to Columbia to take part in the AIDS Benefit Foundation of South Carolina’s Dining with Friends Dessert Finale. The event was a

tremendous success. I have served on their board for the past two years and it is one of the few volunteer initiatives I was able to remain active with when I lived in Columbia. I have always enjoyed volunteering with organizations I am passionate about, but in doing my daily routine I often find myself unable to make time to do so. Now that I am no longer in Columbia, I have begun looking at ways I can get involved with organizations here in Charlotte. There are many great organizations based in North Carolina whose efforts are strongly influenced by their volunteer force. Without volunteers many non-profit and support agencies do not have the manpower to reach their

general gayety by leslie robinson qnotes contributor

The sensitivity games

The Olympic Games are a huge undertaking for any country that hosts them. So many things can go wrong, from terrorist attacks to ticket snafus. Organizers of this summer’s London games are determined not to fail in one particular area: sensitivity. The water polo players might drown each other and the boxers will pound one another into clotted cream, but visitors to the games will be treated with civility and respect. Every last bloody one of them. Over 70,000 Olympic volunteers are slated to take sensitivity training ahead of the London games, which begin on July 27. The Telegraph reported that during training sessions at Wembley Arena, volunteers answered six multiple-choice questions using electronic keypads. This “diversity and inclusion” quiz tested how volunteers would handle “sensitive” situations and I’m not talking about a situation like an Israeli weightlifter dropping his barbell on an Iranian competitor’s foot.

Meeting Date: Program:

Time: Cost: Reservations:

Consider the first question, the “sexual orientation” question: A spectator complains to you that there are two men holding hands sitting next to them — they feel very uncomfortable and would like you to tell the couple to stop. What do you do? You tell them to go watch badminton instead. That isn’t one of the possible answers. “You tell the person to stop being a homophobic idiot” is. So is “politely ask the couple to stop holding hands.” The correct answer is, “You explain that there is a huge diversity of people at the London 2012 Games, which includes gay, lesbian and bisexual couples.” Wordy, but accurate. And, sensitive. The homos can continue being themselves and the complainers get their chance to be heard. I’d like to know what the volunteer is supposed to do if the complainer becomes testy. Call in a supervisor, I suppose, or security. Or that Israeli weightlifter. The quiz also includes a “gender/gender

Tuesday, April 17, 2012 Social Media/Crystal Dempsey, Freelance Journalist LGBT Community Center of Charlotte 820 Hamilton St. (North Carolina Music Factory) 5:30-8 p.m. $20. Includes dinner. Cash bar. Free parking. Advance reservations appreciated email businessguild@yahoo.com call 704.565.5075

www.charlottebusinessguild.org

qnotes

March 31-April 13 . 2012

maximum effectiveness. HIV outreach and support is something that is important to me, but there are many more organizations that work in different fields that are always looking for additional support. It is easy to get caught up in our day-today routine and with spring in full bloom, the idea of sacrificing our precious free moments to volunteer may seem like the last thing we would want to do. The fact is volunteering can be a fun and rewarding experience. You just have to find an organization or cause that you are passionate about. One thing I loved about the AIDS Benefit Foundation was that I was able to help a cause I was passionate about while also having a great time! You don’t have to make it a second job; organizations understand that your time is precious and most only ask of you what you are able to give. Currently I am working to build a team for the 2012 AIDS Walk Charlotte and I am looking forward to us walking together in May to raise money and awareness for RAIN. House of Mercy also has an AIDS walk coming up in April. Participating in outdoor campaigns such

as these is a great way to enjoy the beautiful weather while doing something good for a great cause. So, while you are getting into the spring season, I encourage you to find something you are passionate about and make a difference in that area. Currently, the Coalition to Protect All NC Families is working across the state to fight Amendment One and they need volunteer support to get the message out. The Coalition’s work is extremely important and I hope that you will support them however you can. Also, remember that you don’t have to focus on volunteering exclusively within the LGBT community. Working with youth, volunteering at museums or theaters and helping with homeless resources are other ideas for ways to help your community. Remember, you don’t have to commit all of your free time to make a difference. Perhaps, you and some friends can all go in together and pick something you are all passionate about and help out for a day. Find something you love about your community and help it grow! : :

identity” question: A spectator approaches you asking politely where the nearest toilets are. You are not sure if the spectator is male or female. What do you do? If the spectator is American, you watch with amusement as he or she turns red at having used the word “toilet” instead of “bathroom.” Nope, that isn’t among the choices. The options are ask the person “politely if they are male or female,” or “panic” or “tell them where the male, female and accessible toilets are.” The latter is, of course, the correct answer, although I’d give points for honesty to anyone who went with panic. The other questions on the quiz concern “ethnicity/race,” “disability,” “age” and “belief.” All the volunteers receive a handbook to take home, in case anyone wants to do some sensitivity cramming. “I thought it was unnecessary and they could have spent the money in other ways,” said one volunteer from Manchester. “I know they are trying to cater for everybody, but this

was a bit patronizing.” This person felt London 2012 organizers should have faith in the volunteers’ common sense and pointed out that by the end of the quiz, “people were choosing silly answers on purpose.” That must’ve sent organizers into a panic. They’re probably still having nightmares of a volunteer snatching a Muslim’s hijab from her head and tossing it into a passing kayak. The diversity quiz may be over the top, but it’s well intentioned and it certainly now has people — Olympic volunteers and others — thinking about how everybody should be treated, when they’re not poking fun at the quiz. I volunteer to see how well the sensitivity training works. If the London organizers fly my partner and me over, put us up and get us tickets, we’ll hold hands during a basketball game. Grueling work, but we’re willing to make the sacrifice. : : info:

lesarobinson@gmail.com . generalgayety.com

qpoll How much are you willing to volunteer to fight against Amendment One? See the options and vote: goqnotes.com/to/qpoll

LIFE

20 Questions by David Stout :: david@goqnotes.com

Kristian Wedolowski, Charlotte

Actor Kristian Wedolowski grew up in Uruguay. He came to Charlotte after studying at the Universidad Católica del Uruguay to fulfill his dream of appearing in 20 Questions. As everyone knows, it can sometimes take years to make a dream come true. Kudos to Kristian for using his down time wisely — becoming the Managing Director of Queen City Theatre Company and acting in a host of stage productions, including QCTC’s recent “The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told.” We are pleased to confirm that fickle fate has smiled on Kristian at long last. Read on, dear reader, to share in his moment of ultimate triumph.

Are you a morning person or a night owl? I’m definitely not a morning person. I go to bed usually between 2 a.m. and 3 a.m. Yeah, I don’t sleep much because I still wake up very early — but very tired. What’s the funniest stage play you’ve ever seen? I just love “Sordid Lives.” When we produced it, I hadn’t seen the movie, but it grew on me. It has so many cultural jokes that it took me literally 12 performances to fully get the humor in it. Then we had to revive it for me to understand the last couple of jokes. It’s just a big cultural shock. I didn’t know those people existed! What is your favorite era of Madonna’s career? Why are you asking about my crazy obsession? It used to be Blond Ambition until I saw the Girlie Show in Buenos Aires. (I still cannot get over her coming down with the blond afro riding that disco ball!) Then it was Reinvention, but I left that for Confessions and it’s become lately more Sticky and Sweet. On the 26th of March for sure I’m going with MDNA! (I just re-read this and I sound sick!) Have you ever used a ribbed condom? I don’t think so…but it may have a different name in Spanish! Lots of times you lose a lot of good things in translation. Are there any pickles in your pantry? Hell yeah! I love them — especially I like the polish ones with dill. Next question? Who was your first celebrity crush?

Well, I used to love a movie called “The Making of a Male Model” with Jon-Erik Hexum. I think I was 12 when it was on TV in Uruguay. I wanted to be like him — he was perfection — and like in the movie, I so wanted Joan Collins to discover me! (Hmmm, maybe my crush was actually on her. Oh, I met Joan three years ago in Raleigh with Linda Evans!) [Ed. Note: The movie is posted in full on YouTube if anyone wants to check it out.] Are you more likely to make a sandwich with mayonnaise or mustard? Mayonnaise all the way. Mustard is fine, but for hot dogs. I’m very structured and I know which condiment to put with each meat. Do you remember all of the multiplication tables from 1 to 12? Yes, yes and yes! Try me. Have you ever read a Jackie Collins novel? I have. I’ve read “The Bitch” and “The Stud.” You can get the two of them for $17 on Amazon. They are literary masterpieces. I also own the movies starring Joan Collins…heaven! Who’s the sexiest “Tom” of all time? I have to say Tom Ford. I think a man is sexy when he can dress well, has style and the perfect attitude in front of a camera. If he designs his own suits, it’s a plus. I also loved “A Single Man,” which he directed. Which is the better “work” song: “9 To 5,” “Manic Monday,” “She Works Hard For The Money,” “Working For The Weekend”? “9 To 5.” I can relate to that one. Have you ever had the wind knocked out of you? Yes. Two months ago I was invited to Madonna’s “W.E.” premiere in New York. I watched the movie with Madonna sitting four rows behind me. After, I was leaving, turned and there she was coming my way with Lourdes. I didn’t know what to say, but I got to tell her how much I loved the movie and her. I ended up walking out of the theater with Madonna, Lola, my friend and two big bodyguards. Truly a breathtaking moment. Of course, she entered her limo and I walked in the rain to my hotel. Are you good at any style of ballroom dancing? Not at all, but I can dance Tango, Salsa and Merengue. Oddly enough, I learned how to dance these in Japan. How do these films rank based on the number of times you’ve seen them: “Mommie Dearest,” “Showgirls,” “Valley Of The Dolls,” “Whatever Happened To Baby Jane?” It’s a tie. Call it a sin, but I haven’t seen any of them. Can you lend them to me or maybe some reader can send me the DVDs care of qnotes or Queen City Theatre Company? Just in case, I also want to see “Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes” on Blu-ray. Biscuits, yeast rolls or cornbread? So many carbs! I like cornbread. My favorite is the skillet one they have at Halcyon, Flavors from the Earth restaurant in the Mint Museum. Not so high-end, but also good is the cornbread at Boston Market. No yeast. Which stage or film role would you most like to play? Have you seen the recent film “The Picture Of Dorian Gray” with Ben Barnes? I would love

see 20 Questions on 18 March 31-April 13 . 2012

qnotes

BRIEFS

news notes: from the carolinas, nation and world compiled by Lainey Millen :: lainey@goqnotes.com | David Stout :: david@goqnotes.com | O’Neale Atkinson :: oneale@goqnotes.com

Party throws support to CPANCF

RALEIGH — The North Carolina Libertarian Party has joined other opponents of the upcoming anti-gay Amendment One on the ballot on May 8. In a video statement by party Chair J.J. Summerell (pictured), he said “We oppose Amendment One simply because it’s badly designed.” The video was released by the Coalition to Protect All NC Families. He further stated that it was “fraught with far-reaching, unintended consequences.” Duke University Professor Mike Munger, a gubernatorial candidate for the party in 2008, said, “[the amendment] encumbers contract arrangements between all sorts of other people in ways we can’t even begin to imagine.” He added that “government is making a choice about which kinds of arrangements families can raise children in.” The party is joined by Democratic gubernatorial candidates Lt. Gov. Walter Dalton, Bob Etheridge and Rep. Bill Faison, lieutenant gubernatorial candidates Linda Coleman (head of the Office of State Personnel) and Sen. Eric Mansfield. Previously Gov. Beverly Purdue had announced her opposition to Amendment One. President Barack Obama has also voiced his opposition to the amendment. A descendant of the state’s Constitution author, Republican Russell Robinson of Charlotte, said that North Carolina Supreme Court Justice William B. Rodman in 1868 wanted a state that protected all North Carolinians. Robinson felt that it was poorly worded and did not take into account that there were many family relationships that were not defined by contract. Other state Republicans have joined forces with Protect All NC Families in their quest to thwart the potentially harmful measure. Ted Olson, a prominent Republican trial attorney, is against Amendment One. He was on a legal team in California that challenged the constitutionality of Proposition 8. He is heading to the Tar Heel State on April 1 to attend a rally against Amendment One in Greensboro organized by Faith Against Amendment One. On March 22, the University of North Carolina at Charlotte became the ninth university to pass an anti-Amendment One resolution by its senate. The are joined by the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, East Carolina University, the University of North Carolina at Asheville, North Carolina State University, North Carolina Central University, Guilford College, the University of North Carolina at Greensboro and Salem College. Duke University reported in The Chronicle that if the measure were to pass that it would be harder for North Carolina to recruit LGBT faculty. Both Durham and Greensboro city councils have denounced the amendment. A cornucopia of faith communities have also jumped onboard the fight against passage of the ballot measure.

qnotes

The Baptist Peace Fellowship of North America Program Director LeDayne McLeese Polaski put her voice to the debate, reported the Associated Baptist Press. She asserted that this was an issue of justice for the LGBT community, that peace and justice went hand-in-hand. Her organization joins the Association of Welcoming and Affirming Baptists and the Alliance of Baptists for its Many Voices, One Love campaign. Gay-ordained Presbyterian minister Marvin Ellison spoke at Elon University’s Center for the Study of Religion in February. He asserted that while Christianity may become welcoming and inclusive, that transformation was better. He peppered in to the dialogue that “faith leaders have not been willing to translate their personal support into public leadership,” The Pendulum reported. — L.M.

Charlotte Let’s bowl for equality

CHARLOTTE — The Human Rights Campaign is kicking off its Spring season of fun events with an afternoon of bowling on April 15, 2-5 p.m., at AMF Centennial Lanes, 4501 South Blvd. Enjoy the dance/disco/party lights, plus lively music. Tickets are $35/singles; $25/student (ages 12-21 with ID); $15/youth; $150/lane captain (up to five people); and $100/sponsors. All ticket purchases include a one-year membership to HRC. Sponsors and volunteers should email jasonmccraw@aol.com. For more information, visit action.hrc. org/site/Calendar?view=Detail&id=107221. — L.M.

TOY celebrates in duces

CHARLOTTE — Time Out Youth (TOY) is embracing Spring with two events that both honor the season and provide for ways for the LGBT community to enjoy rights of passage. A Celebration of the Arts will be held on April 14 at Theatre Charlotte, 501 Queens Rd. Doors open at 6:30 p.m. and the show starts at 7:30 p.m. This program is a presented by TOY and producer/director Vito Abate (pictured) with support from Drake Dentistry. Abate, originally from New York, has been bringing his “Just Do It” themed reading and performance series to Theatre Charlotte for a number of years with his sidekick Phoebe, a Brussells Griffon pooch. The series is an all-inclusive event that brings together a plethora of theatrical talent to the stage. Abate’s “Just Like You: Stories and Inspiration from Time Out Youth” won a 2011 Metrolina Theatre Award in the Outstanding Original Short Work Special Event category. Tickets are $25. On April 28, Masquerade: An Alternative Prom will be held from 7:30-10:30 p.m. at

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Grand Central, 1000 Central Ave. This event is open to youth between the ages of 13-23 and is drug and alcohol free. Advance tickets are $8/singles, $12/couples. Participants may also purchase tickets at the door for $10/singles, $15/couples. Tickets may be obtained for both events by calling 704-344-8335. — L.M.

Triad Foundation deadline nears

WINSTON-SALEM — The Adam Foundation, a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization, is now accepting grant applications for its Spring grant cycle through April 20. The Foundation raises money in the community and distributes those funds to local agencies as grants in accordance with its mission statement. The Adam Foundation’s 22-year legacy is steeped in addressing the health care needs of those LGBT individuals who may not be on the “normal radar screen” of the Triad community. They have expanded its grant funding reach over the past two decades to include additional areas, such as some cutting-edge arts performances, equality concerns, youth safety issues such as bullying and homelessness and critical education issues that impact the Triad’s LGBT community. For complete details on eligibility and guidelines or for more information, email grants@adamfoundation.org or visit adamfoundation.org/affecting-future. — L.M.

contracts with another private party; nor does this section prohibit courts from adjudicating the rights of private parties pursuant to such contracts.” The difficult part was to define what a “domestic legal union” was. People on both sides of the issue have stated that it failed to explain the measure’s purpose and that it did not state what would be at stake if it passed, the Herald added. It’s now up to the voters of the state to take a side and cast their preference come May 8. — L.M.

National/Global Bipartisan vote affirms equality

Triangle Faith organizations combine

RALEIGH — ECWR (formerly Evangelicals Concerned Western Region) has recently joined forces with the Gay Christian Network (GCN). With this new effort now in play, ECWR has undergone dissolution and their experience, resources and ministry opportunities will now be shared with GCN. Though now having formally paired with ECWR in the past, GCN has often worked with the organization to expand its vision of “sharing Christ’s light and love for all.” A committee has been formed to find ways to blend ECWR’s offerings into GCN’s existing mission and structure. GCN welcomed ECWR’s members into the fold and hoped that ECWR’s work could continue under another entity. — L.M.

Amendment wording gets explanation

RALEIGH — Secretary of State Elaine Marshall, Legislative Services Officer George Hall and Attorney General Roy Cooper were the three-member panel selected to explain the wording of Amendment One. It seems that neither side found it favorable, according to The [Smithfield] Herald. The text reads: “Constitutional amendment to provide that marriage between one man and one woman is the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized in this State.” It further states: “This section does not prohibit a private party from entering into

CONCORD, N.H. — In a show of bipartisan support for the freedom to marry, on March 21 the New Hampshire House of Representatives voted 211 to 116 to reject a measure that would repeal marriage equality in the New England state. Except for those N.H. gay and lesbian couples who have already married, the bill would have replaced marriage with the inferior status of “civil unions.” The vote extends the national momentum toward marriage equality for same-sex couples. In February, the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit upheld the historic August 2010 ruling of the Federal District Court that California’s Proposition 8 is unconstitutional. The decision was followed by another federal judge finding the so-called Defense of Marriage Act unconstitutional, and bipartisan legislative votes for marriage equality in Washington State, New Jersey and Maryland. “With today’s vote [in N.H.] it is crystal clear that the momentum toward marriage equality is truly unstoppable,” said Chad Griffin, board president of the American Foundation for Equal Rights, the sole sponsor of the legal challenge to Prop. 8, and the incoming president of the Human Rights Campaign. “As the courts affirm the freedom to marry for all, so too do the people and their representatives. The people of New Hampshire, and of this entire nation, see and understand that marriage equality is the most fundamental of human freedoms.” — D.S.

NOM under fire — again

ST. PAUL, Minn. — The Minnesota Campaign Finance and Election Board is moving forward with an investigation into the campaign finance activities of Minnesota for Marriage, the umbrella group co-founded by the National Organization for Marriage that is pushing a state constitutional amendment to prohibit same-sex marriage. Common Cause of Minnesota filed complaints against Minnesota for Marriage and the Minnesota Family Council, alleging that both organizations violated state campaign finance laws by hiding individual donors to the ballot measure campaign and filing false reports. Minnesota for Marriage raised more than $1.2 million in contributions during 2011 but disclosed only seven individual contributors responsible for just $2,000. The donations were attributed to just three entities: NOM, the Minnesota Catholic Conference and the Minnesota Family Council. NOM is already being investigated by the Maine Ethics Commission for failing to register with the state as a ballot question committee and refusing to disclose the donors to its 2009 campaign to overturn the state’s marriage equality law. — D.S.

Ex-Justices to be honored

BOSTON, Mass. — Three former Iowa Supreme Court Justices who were part of a unanimous decision to legalize same-sex marriage in that state have been named this year’s recipients of the John F. Kennedy Profile in Courage Award. Former Iowa Chief Justice Marsha Ternus and former justices David Baker and Michael Streit were chosen for setting aside popular opinion to uphold the basic freedoms and security guaranteed to all

citizens under the Iowa constitution. The award will be presented by Caroline Kennedy at a ceremony at the John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum on May 7. The John F. Kennedy Profile in Courage Award is presented annually to public servants who have made courageous decisions of conscience without regard for the personal or professional consequences. The award is named for President Kennedy’s 1957 Pulitzer Prize-winning book, “Profiles in Courage.” — D.S.

Best workplaces recognized

NEW YORK, N.Y. — The Human Rights Campaign Foundation, the educational arm of HRC, honored 189 major U.S. employers as its 2012 “Best Places to Work for LGBT Equality” at the Eighth Annual LGBT Workplace Awards Seminar and Reception. Companies receiving the “Best Places” distinction scored 100 percent on the HRC Foundation’s 2012 Corporate Equality Index. The Index considers non-discrimination policies, benefits, diversity training and other internal resources for LGBT workers, as well as external support for LGBT consumers and job seekers. This year HRC raised the bar, making the criteria to earn a 100 percent score on the CEI more stringent, including requiring companies to offer transgender inclusive healthcare coverage. Nine companies received special recognition at the Mar. 13 ceremony for earning a perfect 100 percent score on the CEI for 10 consecutive years. These companies have consistently demonstrated a commitment to their LGBT employees and diversity in the workplace. They are: Aetna Inc., Alcatel-Lucent, AMR Corp. (American Airlines), Apple Inc., Eastman

Kodak Co., JPMorgan Chase & Co., Nike Inc., Replacements Ltd., and Xerox Corp. — D.S.

Omaha okays gay, trans protections

OMAHA, Neb. — On Mar. 13, the Omaha City Council passed an ordinance banning discrimination in employment and public accommodations on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. Already 123 cities and counties in the country have similar ordinances. HRC partnered with Equal Omaha in advocating for the ordinance. The national group provided data from its workplace project that shows 86 percent of Fortune 500 companies have policies against sexual orientation discrimination and nearly half offer protection on the basis of gender identity. — D.S.

Gay ‘gag order’ becomes law

ST. PETERSBURG, Russia — Despite months of sustained international protests led by global gay rights group AllOut.org and their partners in Russia — ComingOut, SidebySide and the Russian LGBT Federation — St. Petersburg Gov. Georgiy Poltavchenko signed the controversial law that criminalizes reading, writing, speaking or reporting on anything related to LGBT people. Andre Banks, co-founder and executive director of AllOut.org, said, “By validating a new regime of censorship and intolerance, Gov. Poltavchenko has diminished the reputation of his city with the stroke of a pen. One hundred thousand people have promised not to visit the ‘new’ St. Petersburg after this law goes into effect. Travel companies are considering revising their scheduled trips to the city.” — D.S.

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qnotes

Positive Postings

Making HIV Care and Healthcare Better at Rosedale ID by Dale Pierce ~ Practice Manager/Ryan White Program Director

This spring, we at Rosedale ID are investing in the community by putting together changes that we feel will not only impact the services we deliver, but will, in turn, have an impact on the entire HIV community here in our area and beyond. The first major change you may soon notice at Rosedale ID is the addition of new dedicated staff members. In April of 2012, we will be adding several new healthcare positions to our staff. These will include the replacement of Nancy, our dedicated Triage nurse who is opting for retirement in May, and a new LPN being added to our team that will be there to assist you in your visits, focusing mainly on pharmacy needs. We also are transitioning Steven Haynes into a full time Benefits Advocate position to work with our Director of Client Services, Laurie Youron. Ashley Young has joined our staff as an administrative assistant to our Practice Manager, as well as

qnotes

being our new referral coordinator. Maysha James is on staff now to assist the nursing staff as a certified medical assistant. Also signing on in April is our new PA, Wes Thompson. Wes will be at Rosedale to serve the HIV/AIDS populations, as well as bridging the gap for Rosedale with facilitating a more primary care role to our patients and new patients that are looking for a family friendly practice. Wes has practiced medicine for over 25 years and is happy to be joining Rosedale Infectious Disease in April 2012. He provides care to the HIV/AIDS population of Mecklenburg County and surrounding counties, as well as routine medical care to the GLBT community. He is a board certified physician assistant and the first physician assistant to be certified as an HIV Specialist in the state of North Carolina and one of the first in the United States. Wes has co-investigated in over 60 clinical trials for new medications in the fight against HIV. He has the honor to serve as guest lecturer at Davidson University, Duke University, UNCC, and CPCC, Wake Forest University and an Adjunct Professor at Wingate University. If staff changes were not enough for you to grasp this year, Rosedale ID is also going electronic with their patient records. Building from Athenahealth, our current practice management system, we have recently added their clinical product. Aside from the necessary “evil”

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of healthcare reform making all practices go down this route, it is actually going to help your healthcare with us. A portal will be provided to you so that you will be able to access your medical records and labs online 24/7. It will also streamline the effectiveness of your visit and prescription refills with the practice. Although it will certainly be a learning curve for all involved, in the end, we are excited that this system will help enhance the service we provide to you as a patient at Rosedale ID. In 2012, Rosedale ID plans to stay involved and encaged in our community. One way is through this page with QNotes, which we are very proud of. Rosedale ID has also helped already in 2012 by supporting the NC HRC (Human Rights Campaign). We plan to again sponsor the Charlotte AIDSWALK, benefitting RAIN on May 5, 2012. In November we will again host our annual Evening of Hope and Inspiration as well as striving to serve as a good community partner in healthcare throughout the year. The lobby at Rosedale ID has a patient library section; we periodically have free items or informational handouts for our population, a regular newsletter, constant updates on our webpage and Facebook, and a new patient information board in the lobby. As practice manager I strive to make sure that we are not only providing the highest quality

healthcare and patient services, but that we listen to you as the patient/client in hopes that suggestions you make can help to enhance your care and your overall experience with us. It is also nice to know that our work is at times recognized. Athenahealth, our EMR provider and data management system, holds an annual conference in April in Boston. This year Ashley Young and I will be in attendance to take advantage of learning updates with you in mind. Today, Athenahealth helps over 31,000 medical providers nationwide enjoy faster payment, increased collections, radically improved control over billing and clinical operations, and more time for their patients. This year at the conference they will be handing out two Visionary Awards to individuals that are “making a difference in healthcare.” I am humbled and proud to say that I was selected as a national recipient of this award this year. So, at the conference, not only will I be honored, but Rosedale ID and the work all of our staff does will be highlighted in a video presentation and held up as an extraordinary example of what true, caring individuals can do when they work together as a team for patient care. Don’t forget to visit our website at rosedaleid.com and friend us on Facebook for community and clinical updates. — Sponsored Content —

VIEWS

transilluminations by eva hayward qnotes contributor

Must we be extraordinary to be ordinary?

Clacking away at my laptop, chunky Dior glasses sliding to the end of my nose and lips pursed in concentration, with a lifted finger, I momentarily held off the doctor while I crafted a last sentence. Surely a well-rendered sentence matters as much as a steady heart rate. I was writing my February opinion column for the Indy on love, desire and the Roman holiday Lupercalia, while receiving blood transfusions in a Cincinnati hospital bed. Landing there was my own bloody Valentine — ironic comeuppance for downplaying the holiday’s savagery. My gesture was not simply a power play, Ph.D. versus M.D., but an insistence on being respected. Because without exception, every doctor who came into my room was fascinated to distraction to learn that I am transsexual. One doctor asked me if I were born female or male and when I told him, he seemed perplexed and asked if I had had sex reassignment surgery and then asked about cosmetic surgeries and then still seemed confused. But, the most troubling issue was that I had wound up in the hospital for reasons unrelated to my sex. I needed care for pain and blood loss, but with an IV in my arm and secured hospital floors, he had me positioned to satisfy his curiosity. Over the last two years, I have been in three hospitals: University of New Mexico Hospital, Duke University Hospital and University of Cincinnati Hospital. At each institution, to different degrees of unpleasantness, doctors and nurses have demanded that I discuss my transsexuality, whether I am in for pneumonia or stomach disease. When I was admitted to UNM Hospital, unable to breathe, an intake nurse, after trying to flatter me with “I had no idea you were transgender,” talked to me about accepting his gay son and the challenges that came with that decision in rural New Mexico, while I gasped and shook my head empathetically. While at Duke University Hospital, a senior doctor brought 10 interns into my room to not just discuss my sex change, but to eyeball my very sex. Patience curdling into frustration, I asked how this information mattered and why it required an audience. Seemingly imperious, he said, “It does matter.” Perhaps, it does, but I could never get a good explanation as to exactly how, nor why these sorts of encounters happened so often during my stays. My exasperation hardly ends with the medical establishment. When people know about my transition, there is an instant feeling of intimacy, as if I have surrendered my privacy to them and become a trusting friend. Acquaintances will confide their dreams to me or make unwarranted advances and otherwise feel overfamiliar with me. And, even folks I generally adore have a tendency to suppose something special or transgressive about my identity. As it happens, a dear friend and I have been engaged in an ongoing debate about “queerness.” For her, to be queer is the highest of accomplishments, an exalted mode of existence. When I tell her that I am not so queer, that my identity is rather commonplace, she looks askance at me. But, it is true: I don’t have remarkable insight into the numen of sex systems. I am not liberated from the conventions of gender, sex or sexuality. Nor do I represent the body’s triumph over nature or godliness. At one time in my life, not wanting to be ensnared in my past, I celebrated an unhin-

dered present. I disowned who I had been for who I had become. I withdrew from family and old friendships and met new people without discussing my transition. Later it dawned on me that rather than dismissing my history, I was denying it, which felt isolating and self-effacing. Maybe we all have the feeling that we haven’t quite lived our life until we have narrated it. While I do not see sex change as extraordinary, I understand that my experience gives me a particular sensibility. And, since I do not live in “stealth” — a word used by some to describe a life in which no one knows you are transgender — I have had to expect questions about my transition, even if I don’t really want, nor know how, to answer. Grateful as I am by nature, reluctant to tell it all and surprisingly lucky in other respects, I find it difficult to dig through old miseries and doubts. I do my best, though, to be honest in discussions about transsexuality. I have written about sex change for academic and journalistic venues, but always my effort is to place transsexuality within an unsurprising sphere of experience. In this I share the sentiments of a young man who wrote to the governor of Washington State, explaining how marriage equality matters to him: “No one should have to be extraordinary to be ordinary.”

see Transillumunations on 18

March 31-April 13 . 2012

qnotes

LIFE

Dwellings 2012: Home & Garden Ways to beautify your garden by StatePoint Media

Whether your garden is a source of food for your family, a way to beautify your home’s outdoor spaces or a gathering place for parties, you already know how beneficial your outdoor hobby can be. But, a garden needn’t only be a human habitat. If you cultivate it right, you can encourage beautiful wildlife to become regular visitors to your garden all season long. Here are some tips to get started: • Plant native flowers, shrubs and trees to give local wildlife the proper sustenance they

need to survive. Skip flowers bred strictly for size and color and opt for high-nectar yielding flowers instead. • Incorporate birdfeeders into your garden. Not only will they look great, they are an excellent supplemental food source for your feathered friends. And, you can keep furry friends at bay with a squirrel-proof feeder. • If you build a water source, they will come (and stay). A pond or birdbath will help prevent birds from eating and going in search of water.

• Birds need cover to protect themselves from predators. Planting densely with a mix of smaller trees, shrubs and beds of annuals and perennials will do the trick. • Avoid pesticides. These chemicals are potentially harmful to you and your family and the same goes for wildlife. Also, by killing garden pests, you will eliminate a primary source of protein for birds in search of nourishment for their migration ahead. Once you’ve invited all these creatures to share your garden, you’re going to need to take some steps to make it safe for them. While a garden might be a safe haven, your home can be a death trap. According to Wyoming-based Western EcoSystems Technology, an estimated 98 million birds are killed annually in the U.S. from colliding with glass windows. That is one bird fatality per house. But you don’t need to be part of the problem. Applying static-cling decals to your windows will prevent birds from mistaking your windows for thin air. And, you can apply such a decal without affecting the appearance of your home. For example, decals from WindowAlert rely on a special ultravioletreflecting coating that is invisible to humans, but looks like a brilliant glow to birds. You can learn more at WindowAlert.com. “Your home needn’t pose a danger to birds,” stresses Spencer Schock, founder of WindowAlert, Inc. If you spot an injured bird in your garden, don’t rescue it. If it’s young, its parents are likely nearby. If you want to take action, call

Dwellings 2012: Home & Garden Boosting your home’s curb appeal

your wildlife office for information on licensed rehabilitators. With a few tweaks to your garden, you can create an eco-friendly habitat for the birds and the bees and everything in between. After all, there’s nothing more beautiful than a garden that is not only good to you and your family, but to wildlife, as well. : :

Local tips for Spring garden spruce up Clean out all landscape beds of old winter debris and leaves. Cut back any perennials that you didn’t get to in the Fall. Hand prune all of your Southern camellias right after they bloom. Options for Southern gardens

I always love using native plant materials and those tried and true to our region as opposed to plants that have been over hybridized. Clethra “Crystalina” is a fabulous new dwarf variety of our native deciduous shrub that produces fragrant white panicles in the late Summer when everything else in the garden seems tired after a hard hot Summer. This works great in our soils in full sun or some shade; yellow Fall color on the leaves is a plus, too. Itea “Little Henry” is my favorite dwarf variety of our native sweet-spire. Early white flowers hang like a strand of pearls on this plant that slowly spreads to colonize an area without invasiveness in our clay soils, sun or semi shade. See many more more local tips from Myron Greer online at goqnotes. com/14658/. — Myron Greer, myrongreer.com

by StatePoint Media

You can’t judge a book by its cover, but you can judge a home by its exterior. And, with warmer weather comes thoughts of outdoor home improvement projects. If you’re looking to boost your house’s curb appeal this season, think about adding color from top to bottom. “Homeowners shouldn’t be afraid of color. Contrasting colors, complementary colors and color accents on a home, when done right, can all add tremendously to the curb appeal of a house,” says national color expert Kate Smith, CMG and owner of Sensational Color. This season Smith is offering some top-to-bottom tips to homeowners ready for bold change: The Roof If your roof appears old and dingy, is leaking or wearing thin, it’s time to research replacement options. Consider durable synthetic slate or shake tiles in a variety of hues. For example, DaVinci Roofscapes offers 49 roof colors along with 28 standard color blends. “Selecting roofing colors that complement the rest of the home helps your eye move from the top down,” says Smith. If you’re overwhelmed by the choices, a free “Fresh Exteriors Color” guide is available for download atsensationalcolor.com. The windows Whether you’re looking for low-maintenance vinyl replacement or new construction windows, add a splash of color to complement your home’s exterior and interior as well. A bold color contrast, like red window frames against crisp white trim pieces is a classic eye-catching look. “A window is like a two-sided canvas,” says Smith. “The col-

qnotes

March 31-April 13 . 2012

ors on the frame exteriors enhance the home’s overall appearance from the street. And, when you get inside and select stylish woodgrain frame interiors, you’re adding beauty to the room settings. That’s a ‘win-win’ experience for any homeowner.“ The Decorum collection by Simonton Windows for example, provides a variety of custom color options like brick, chocolate, bronze and pine green. The door The door to your house should make a statement. A door with a smooth paintable surface, made with low-maintenance fiberglass, allows you to make a new statement as often as you’d like. For example, Therma-Tru’s Classic Craft Canvas Collection has these features, as well as wide center panels and rich embossment details that rival high-end custom wood doors. To further enhance the entryway to your home, consider installing decorative glass inserts in the door. Then, flank the door with a set of easy-to-install Fypon urethane pilasters, a stylish crosshead and pediment. Resistant to

moisture, insects, rot and humidity, both the urethane trim and fiberglass entry door are great low-maintenance solutions to adding curb appeal for the home. From top to bottom, color and detail can give your home a bold, stylish makeover. : :

Low maintenance products can create a stunning home exterior.

on the map nightlife Sunday

Barbeque & Bloody Marys, Bar at 316 free BBQ from 3-6 p.m. Super Sundays with Aiesha Paris, Nickel Bar starts at 8 p.m. House Cast Show, The Scorpio with DJ 4Real. 11:30 p.m. Woodshed Sundays, The Woodshed free dinner buffet served at 6:30 p.m. karaoke, 9 p.m.

Monday

Movie Night, Bar at 316 starts at 9 p.m. Monday Madness, Chasers pool tournament at 11:30 p.m. $25 cash prize and $25 bar tab. Boxing & Monday Night Football, Sidelines Free Pool, The Woodshed all day.

Tuesday

Karaoke with Metro Mike, Bar at 316 starts at 9 p.m. Pool Tournament, Central Station Twisted Trivia, Chasers with Tiffany Storm & Brooklyn Dior. Showtime at 12:30 a.m. Trivia Tuesdays, Marigny hosted by Roxxy C. Moorecox 7 p.m.

Midwood Madness, Petra’s half-price bottles of wine Karaoke, The Woodshed starts at 9 p.m.

Wednesday

Game Night, Bar at 316 Team Trivia and Line Dancing, Hartigan’s starts at 8 p.m. ’90s music night, Nickel Bar Karaoke, Petra’s hosted by Rachel Houdek. 9 p.m. Wicked and Wild Wednesdays, The Scorpio featuring Tiffany Storm with DJ 4Real. 11 p.m. Pool Tournament, The Woodshed starts at 10:30 p.m.

Thursday

Thursday Night House Party, Bar at 316 Pool Tournament, Central Station Rockin’ Well Thursdays, Chasers with Valerie Rockwell. Show starts at 12:30 a.m. Free HIV Testing, Connections the 2nd Thursday of every month. 8-10 p.m. Karaoke Night, Hartigan’s hosted by Roxxy C. Moorecox. 9 p.m. Team Boystown, Marigny starts at 10 p.m. $10 cover after 11 p.m. Drink-n-drown. Karaoke Night, The Rainbow In free for members. $5 guests. $6 under 21. Underwear Night, The Woodshed

Friday

House DJ and Dancing, Bar at 316 Free HIV Testing, Connections the 4th Friday of every month. 8-10 p.m. A-List Fridays, Marigny hosted by SugaWalls Entertainment. 10 p.m. Live DJ, Nickel Bar Live Performances, Petra’s Roxy’s Rainbow Review, The Rainbow In starts at 11p.m. Life’s a Drag, The Scorpio with Tiffany Storm. 11:30 p.m.

New Life MCC Worship service every Sunday, 7 p.m. Monthly covered dish dinner and coffeehouse-style worship service on the first Sunday of every month, 6 p.m. Unity Fellowship Church of Charlotte Worship service every Sunday, 10:45 a.m. Bible 101: second and fourth Sunday of every month, 9 a.m. Wednesday night Bible study and discussion, 7 p.m.

Saturday

House DJ and Dancing, Bar at 316 The Angela Lopez Show, Chasers show starts at 12:30 a.m. Live DJ, Hartigan’s Krewe Saturdays, Marigny Soul Music, Nickel Bar Live Performances, Petra’s Urban Variety Show, The Scorpio with Elaine Davis. Midnight showtime.

Congregations MCC Charlotte Worship service every Sunday, 10:45 a.m. Bible study every Tuesday and Wednesday, 7 p.m.

Community The LGBT Community Center of Charlotte Promoting the diversity, acceptance and visibility of the LGBT community through programming and events. gaycharlotte.com White Rabbit North Carolina’s LGBT everything store. Complete line of Pride merchandise, plus books, magazines, DVDs, T-shirts, underwear and more. info: Don’t see your bar listed here? Submit your regularly scheduled events to editor@goqnotes.com

March 31-April 13 . 2012

qnotes

LIFE

Sports: Playing the field Spring season heats up

by Jon Hoppel :: qnotes contributor

Softball The first annual Duck Invitational Tournament was held in Atlanta, Sunday, March 11. The event was graciously hosted by the Atlanta Ducks Softball Club in College Park. Teams from Tennessee and Georgia competed in C and D level divisions, in a single elimination style tournament. The number 1 overall seed, the Knoxville Cyclones, won the C Division, outlasting the number 2 overall seed, the Atlanta Assault, in an extra inning thriller, 7-6. Despite the somewhat soggy conditions, both teams played phenomenal defense, making this a close one. No team had more than a 3-run lead the entire game. Led by Charlotte area players Jared West and Quinton McNutt, the Cyclones were able to defeat the Assault with two runs in the bottom of the 8th to take the title. In the D Division championship, the Atlanta Titans handily defeated Knoxville Good Times 17-9 to claim the title. The Titans scored early, quickly had a lead and never looked back by playing solid defense throughout the game. The next NAGAAA sanctioned tournament will be the 30th Annual Southern Shootout, held in Birmingham, Ala., Easter weekend. This is one of the larger gay softball tournaments in the Southeast and it will be hosting teams from as far away as Louisiana, Texas and Ohio. For more information about who will be there

and what park they will play at, check out their website atnewsouthsoftball.net/. Rugby

Royals player David June rushes the ball during a recent game.

The Charlotte Royals took their team on the road for a St. Patrick’s Day clash in Columbus, Ohio, to play the Coyotes. This was the first of a home and home between the two teams and each was looking to set the tone for the late season match up on May 5. The game was tight throughout, with Columbus holding a one-try lead at the half, 12-5. But in the second half, the Royals were unable to surmount the deficit and lost 29-12. Despite losing the close game, Coach Amanda Vestal remained upbeat. “Overall it was a good, competitive match…we got the ball to the line, and made good passes. It will be a good match for us later this season.” Earning men of the match honors for the Royals were forward Coty Webb, who scored once during the game, and scrum half, BJ Smith. Scoring the other try for the Royals was inside centerback Zach Anderson. The Coyotes were lead in scoring by Cordaro Rogers (2), with Chase Kuhn, Lucas Herman, and Matt Kretovics all finding the try zone. The Charlotte Royals stayed on the road the following weekend when they took on the Davidson College Wildcats on March 24. This was the first matchup between the two teams after inclement weather forced a cancellation of a previously scheduled match two years ago. The Royals looked to bounce back from consecutive losses and earn their first win of the season. After that, the Royals will head to St. Louis where they are participating in the Spring Fever Invitational, hosted by the St. Louis Crusaders. This tournament will be played April 2 involving teams from across the South and Midwest. This will be a good experience to have under their belt as they make preparations to attend the largest gay rugby tournament, the Bingham Cup in June. : :

Last Call!

qnotes

March 31-April 13 . 2012

NEWS

Get your GIF on starting in April Local consumer coupon program for LGBT goes live by O’Neale Atkinson : : editor@goqnotes.com

In October 2011, qnotes reported about the upcoming launch of Gay It Forward (GIF), a coupon-based website similar to Groupon that will be focused on the LGBT community in Charlotte. Different from sites like it, GIF will not only offer coupons to LGBT friendly businesses, but will also provide consumers the opportunity to contribute some of their spending to go to local and national LGBT organizations. GIF’s launch was delayed in order to ensure that everything would be ready to go and that there would be plenty of great deals. GIF is scheduled to go live with their first deal on April 10. GIF is the brainchild of co-founders Dan Mauney and Mike Rusk. The two see this as an opportunity to educate the community on local LGBT friendly businesses, while at the same time supporting local and national LGBT organizations. “Now is a time that we have to be extremely cognizant. This is a pivotal time for our community and we can’t always just go out and vote. We need to do more to make sure that we rally around the people that rally around us,” says Mauney. GIF has selected two national organizations and three local organizations to benefit from the purchases of GIF certificates once the program launches. Campus Pride and the Human Rights Campaign will be the national organization recipients and Time Out Youth, The LGBT Community

Center of Charlotte and Regional AIDS Interfaith Network will be the local organizations. Individuals who purchase a GIF certificate will have the option to select one of these organizations during the checkout. The selected organization will receive 10 percent of the revenues made by GIF from the purchase. If no organization is selected at checkout, the revenues will be divided equally among the five organizations. According to Mauney, taking advantages of the savings offered by GIF will be a simple process for consumers. Each time a new deal is posted to the website, consumers who have signed up for notifications will receive an email with the current deal. Most deals will have a time frame or cap and so each deal will be time sensitive. To purchase a GIF you simply go onto the website and use their online checkout system. During checkout you will be asked to select an organization to benefit from your purchase. Once your

purchase is confirmed you will receive a GIF certificate electronically that you can use at the specified location. For the month of April, GIF plans to offer a new deal each week so people can get a feel for the program and in May the number of deals will expand. Ultimately there will be several different types of GIFs offered throughout the month. Certain deals will change weekly, such as shopping and dining, while entertainment deals will change monthly and travel deals will be quarterly. According to Mauney, businesses are responding favorably to the idea of participating in the program. “We have had a great response from local businesses. They really like that we have a targeted market and we

are working with each business so they can create their own deal.” In terms of the types of deals that will be offered, Mauney says that they are aiming to have a wide range of services participating in the GIF program. “We’re talking about doctors’ offices for cosmetic procedures, mechanical things like oil changes, massages and spa treatments and even down to things like painting for home and, of course, great shopping and dining deals.” Mauney expects that GIF will be well received by the Charlotte community and is already working on plans to expand the program to other cities. “It has taken us a little bit of time to launch, but we wanted to make sure that we had all of the bells and whistles ready to replicate into other markets quickly after GIF launches.” GIF is planning to target Atlanta and Washington, D.C., once the program takes off in Charlotte. As GIF expands, each city will have their own page on the site with three local organizations of their own as beneficiaries of the purchases. To help get the word out about GIF, there will be a TakeOver launch party on April 6. The launch party will be held at Vivace, 1100 Metropolitan Ave., Suite 100, a local contemporary Italian restaurant that will be featured as an upcoming GIF deal. For more information about Gay It Forward, visit gayitforwardcoupon.com. : :

March 31-April 13 . 2012

qnotes

VIEWS

talkback:

Amendment One

by Ashlei Blue Regional Field Director for the Coaliation to Protect All NC Families

Faith into action

The opposition wants you to think they have registered domain over faith and religion while our Coalition to Protect NC Families has proved them wrong every step of the way. This amendment will affect unmarried families that are Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist and Agnostic, a fact they may have overlooked. Charlotte voters, however, have not. Many times, LGBT campaigns neglect to reach out to faith organizations and include them in conversations. Under the guiding hand of our Regional Faith Field Organizer, Kelly Berry, we’ve been able to gather the signatures of 28 clergy making statements against the amendment and now they’re putting their faith into action.

qnotes

Rev. Robin Tanner has led the charge against the amendment on behalf of Piedmont Unitarian Universalists, while Rev. Stephen Shoemaker at Myers Park Baptist has delivered powerful sermons on the subject. Rev. Chris Ayers of Wedgewood Baptist has been openly involved as well, turning their church marquee into an “Against Amendment One” billboard. Temple Beth-El has spearheaded conversations, joining the ranks of Caldwell Memorial Presbyterian, St. Martin’s Episcopal, St. John’s Baptist, Holy Trinity, Charlotte Friends, Sardis Baptist and Unity Fellowship Church. We won’t stop there. We’re going up and down the Beatties Ford Corridor and down to South Charlotte to get even more support.

March 31-April 13 . 2012

Vote No! Vote No! Vote No! Vote No! Vote No!

Amendment One • May 8 Learn More About The Anti-Gay Measure Here! This is not an easy topic for any faith to approach, but scripture teaches us to “commit your way to the Lord…He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.” With God at their right hand, supporters have not been shaken by the condemnations thrown their way in defense of LGBT rights. We are thankful for every volunteer and every clergy member that has stood in front of their brothers and sisters against this amendment. As a person of faith, I’ve made it my personal pleasure to show our opposition just how good God is to all families. Please join me in reaching out to your congregation. If you are not sure where your place of faith stands on the issue, make it your business to ask. As

a faithful tither, you deserve to know where your rabbi, bishop, pastor and faith instructor stands on Amendment One. Find your congregation’s social justice committee and put it on the agenda during their next meeting. Hang around after Bible study, pull a clergy member to the side and find out if they are aware North Carolina’s constitution could be amended to revoke the rights of too many of God’s people in Charlotte. Ask them to stand beside you and put their faith into action by voting against Amendment One. On Sunday, April 29 we are holding a Faith to the Ballot Rally at the Hal Marshall Annex, where supporters of all religious backgrounds will join each other and vote against amendment one. You can meet us there after church at 1 p.m., 618 College St. : :

LIFE

Dwellings 2012: Home & Garden Better home organization can save you money by StatePoint Media

Did you know that a disorganized household can cost your family money? From failing to make necessary repairs before itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s too late, to mismanaging the household budget, there can be a high price to disorganization. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t accrue unnecessary expenses that could be avoided by simply streamlining your household. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The key to running a happy home is having a system to keep everything neat and orderly,â&#x20AC;? says Elizabeth Dodson, co-founder of HomeZada, a revolutionary home organization online software application. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no better time than Spring to do some house cleaning and get your home life in order. Here are some tips to get you started:

Maintain Each year, 15,600 dryer fires occur, resulting in property damage exceeding $75 million. And, the leading cause is lack of maintenance. Preserve the overall value of your largest asset, your home, with regular maintenance of your house and appliances. An online program can secure documentation and help you keep details straight, such as when you last tested your smoke detectors or replaced your air filters. Track In this digital day and age, make paper tracking of your familiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; schedule and to-do lists a thing of the past. By going digital, it will be harder to make costly mistakes like missed

appointments and overdue bills. Online organizational tools are replacing the chore wheel, the calendar and the message board, consolidating all this information in one place. Opt for a safe and secure service that sends alerts and reminders to users about what tasks needs to get done. For example, HomeZada makes it easy for a family to create a plan, assign chores and get on the same page. Plan Ahead Nobody likes to think about challenges like burglaries, fires and floods. But, these things can and do happen, so itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best to be prepared for anything. Unfortunately, most people have incomplete records about their home and

possessions and often, this information is scattered in multiple boxes, filing cabinets, drawers and spreadsheets. An online tracking tool can help you maximize your insurance benefits in the event of emergency, by storing the important details of your possessions in one place. Look for a service that even will let you track upcoming warranty expiration dates, sending you reminders to your phone or email. More tips on what to look for in an online home management tool can be found athomezada.com. When it comes to running an organized household, there are a lot of moving parts. But. by getting them together today, you can save your family money and headaches tomorrow. : :

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March 31-April 13 . 2012

qnotes

A&E

out in the stars by charlene lichtenstein qnotes contributor

March 31 - April 13

We are no April Fools especially with the march of planets through strong constellations of Aries and Taurus. Know where you are and where you are going. When in doubt, pretend like you know what you are doing and no one will question you. ARIES (03.21-04.20) Even if money is a pressing concern, it squeezes you a little less now. That is because your charisma seems to generate the generosity of benefactors. Milk it for all its worth, proud Ram, and invest the spillage into clever and well-researched equities. You never know when you will need that extra fiscal oomph — and exactly how much oomph you will really need. TAURUS (04.21-05.21) Move with the big movers and shakers, queer Bull. You need to find new herds to join and new pastures in which to roam. Not only can you spread your influence, your ample, generous personality can command any crowd. Use it for good and not for petty and selfish purposes. Later on, you may need to rely on the kindness of strangers and then what?. GEMINI (05.22-06.21) The gossip and scuttle is that pink Twins are the ones to know. They have powers of persuasion and are a link to everything that is good. Is that true? No matter what you think and feel, you can glide on the wings of great press and unforeseen lucky graces. Go with the flow and don’t ask too many questions. All too soon you will be back to grabbing anything you can get. CANCER (06.22-07.23) Friends are working for your benefit, so allow them some space and freedom to do what they want and need to do for you. In fact, use this time to expand your social circle beyond

qnotes

March 31-April 13 . 2012

your clique. Join new organizations and elite groups. You seem to have what it takes to take on anything and anyone. There is someone in particular who has big plans for you. How big is big? LEO (07.24-08.23) Even though you feel like a rat in the middle of a big rat race, there is a payoff at the finish line. Proud Lions think that all their hard efforts have been ignored by the top executives, but that is wrong. In fact, there may be some additions to your responsibilities that can increase your value to the company. Oh, goody. But where is the money? VIRGO (08.24-09.23) You are currently an international sensation. Immerse yourself with anything regarding the internet and social media or do it the old-fashioned way and just travel. Find any excuse for a vacation. It has palliative benefits. Queer Virgins yearn to expand their borders. Don’t sit and wait for something to happen. Go for a land grab and manifest your destiny. LIBRA (09.24-10.23) You charmer you. Not only do you ooze sexuality, you can maximize every deep encounter — from business to pleasure — to your personal benefit. Lovers are powerful figures who enhance your life. Legal issues resolve to your benefit based partially on your charm. Even mundane projects become epicenters of creativity and opportunity. May this time period last forever for you. SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) Relationships improve dramatically right now and not a moment too soon. Queer Scorps who are looking for a special someone can find them…if they get out there and look.

Those currently in a partnership find that romantic delightful moments increase exponentially. Don’t waste this time on dredging up the past. Look to the future and any lovely present that you can offer. SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) Gay Archers seem to have more pep and energy. Maybe that is because you have found new ways to get rid of all your excess “stuff,” whether that means jobs, tasks, clutter or issues, that drain your energy reserves. Good, because you will soon have other, more enticing things to take up your time and excess energies. No names please! CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) You are feeling pretty lucky. But, if you have the choice of being lucky in cards or lucky in love, choose love. Gambling may seem easy, but it has little long-term impact. Love on the other hand, goes from light to heavy as time progresses. Pink Caps with a penchant for drama can ramp up their creativity. Body painting with food is a thought. AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) It feels so cozy at home it may be hard for you to get out and mosey around town. But, try to find time for both cocooning and gadflying about. It might be a good time to plan for some extensive home renovations or even a festive basheroo or two. For those Aqueerians with family issues, tackle them now. You are especially diplomatic for a change. PISCES (02.20-03.20) Even a stray thought can take on monumental proportions. So, nurture any idea, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem. You have a wonderful way of expressing yourself and hold boundless enthusiasm that is contagious. Remember: Little acorns grow into big oaks and tiny sparks of genius can light the world. Yes, even you Guppie. : : © 2012 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment. info: Visit www.TheStarryEye.com for e-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry. My book “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is available at bookstores and major booksites.

by trinity qnotes contributor

So your husband wants to do drag

Hello Trinity, Suddenly, out of nowhere, my partner wants to do drag. Is there anything I can say to change his mind? Drag Dramas, Austin, TX Hello Drag Dramas, It seems like every once in a while a gay or straight guy wants to crossdress or do drag. And, every once in a while that same guy later on decides to become a drag artist. However, this is as rare as someone wanting to be an astronaut after being trapped in a bubble for a week. So, if you must tell him something tell him, “I’m ready if you are!” Darling, once he takes two hours in make up, two hours getting dressed, spends a night in heels and is wrapped in hose and a girdle, don’t worry, he’ll be worshipping high tops and carpenter pants as quick as you can say, “Down in front, soldier.” Not to worry. Dear Trinity, I’m an affectionate guy, but my lover is overly affectionate in public. We live in a small town and I don’t feel safe as an openly gay couple. What do I do? Suburbiaphobia, St. Louis, MO Dear Suburbiaphobia, I’m a true advocate of being out and living fearlessly. Yet, I also believe in living safely and strategically. While being affectionate in public as a gay couple may not always be safe, it may be executed strategically. Try being affectionate in private spots in public places. Spend time in gay friendly places like P-town where holding hands is commonplace and will help you feel better. And, if you’re still nervous, then take self-defense classes. Seriously. Eventually, pumpkin, we all must face our fears in order to make them disappear! Be safe but free. Dearest Trinity, I’m a respectable woman, but I’m in a disrespectable situation. I’m dating two women at once and it’s going to be a year. They both live in different parts of the country. That’s how I’ve kept it going. Now, they both want to move in with me. Help! Three’s Company, Detroit, MI Dearest Company, How thrilling and dangerous! How selfish and crazy! I have two words for you: honesty and decision. Tell the one you like the least what

you’ve done and see if she says, “I love you anyway.” Then tell her you’ll call her right back. Right after, quickly call the one you really like and tell her the same thing. If she dumps you, then your decision is made. If she says, “I love you no matter what.” then get rid of the first woman by either paying her off or lovingly letting her go. Either way, sweetie, you’re honest and left with one woman to love and hold and, oh God, my head is still spinning. (I’m caught in a spin cycle myself as you can see from my cartoon.) Trinity, My husband started taking steroids. He wants to be the Hulk. It’s making us fight more than ever. He gets enraged so easily now. How do I keep my marriage from exploding? Too Big Too Fast, Savannah, GA Dear Too Big Too Fast, Steroids: Looking like a beast and acting like one too. He’s obviously reading too many muscle mags or is in a mid-life crisis. Before moving out, read: Trinity’s Strong Tips For Dealing With A Man Who Is Taking Steroids 1. Move into your guest room until the cycle’s over. 2. Do impressions of him so he knows what he acts like. 3. If he needs steroids, you need therapy. Right away! 4. Force yourself to be more understanding. 5. Destroy the alcohol. Alcohol with steroids turns Dr. Jekyll into Mr. Hyde. 6. Love him for his needs, whether you agree or not. 7. Try to support him. That’s your job. 8. Let him know how difficult it is for you. 9. Make him sign a will, in case you kill him. 10. And, lastly, when it’s over you may get a big hulking surprise with some pimples. : : — With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama, and now performs globally. info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com Sponsored by: Provincetown Business Guild 800-637-8696 . www.ptown.org

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20 Questions

Transilluminations

continued from page 5

to play Dorian Gray, but on stage. I think it is extremely sexy and a topic we all deal with: the fear of growing older. Recently a fantastic local artist made a huge painting of me as The Arbiter in “Chess.” I like to think the painting will grow old from now on instead of me! I also think I would have loved to play WALL-E in the Pixar movie. Why can only a talking cat have an accent…and cool boots?!? Can you ride a unicycle? In my mind I can ride it perfectly! Why not?

continued from page 9 Have you ever been elected to any position? What position? Such an intimate question! Ah, I know what you mean, and no, I haven’t. Which is greater, your shoe size or the number of times you’ve been in drag? My shoe size. I make an ugly woman. Which pro athlete is the epitome of male physical perfection? Probably David Beckham. I like his style, his presence and the new H&M commercials. Not to mention he has Posh Spice. : :

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March 31-April 13 . 2012

Several years ago I attended a show at the Exit Theatre in San Francisco. Veronica Klaus was performing her one-woman show, “Family Jewels.” Veronica sums up frustrations and sentiments when she ponders, “People ask me if I feel like a woman. Do I feel like a woman? The truth is, I have no idea whether I feel like any other woman. I have no idea whether I ever felt like any other man. All I know is that I feel like me, Veronica, a person whose existence is partly innate, partly instinct, partly art, the art of creating.”

As I tend to repeat, transsexuality is life loving itself, loving its capacity for invention, change and possibility. All that seems arcane about transsexuality — hormone replacement therapy, surgeries, name changes — can be understood as marks of healing and of the desire to live well. For me, and, perhaps, because it is my experience, there is something simple if undefinable about transsexuality, resisting blunt definitions and analyses. It just is. I accepted it as it happened, and am sure I did the right thing. : :

It’s time to ‘believe’

April 7 • Charlotte ‘Believe in Youth’ Annual Speaker Series Campus Pride and Time Out Youth have partnered to present their third annual “Believe in Youth Awareness Event” with national young adult leader and marriage equality advocate Zach Wahls. Wahls, 20, is known as “that kid from YouTube with two moms.” His passionate testimony before the Iowa General Assembly against a proposed anti-LGBT constitutional amendment was the number one YouTube “Political Video” of 2011. Read more about Wahl’s and other straight allies online at goqnotes.com. Free. Open to the public. 5 p.m. Wells Fargo Auditorium at Knight Theatre at Levine Center for the Arts, 430 S. Tryon St. campuspride.org. timeoutyouth.org. (Pictured are Wahls with his family.) April 1 • Charlotte Day of Action with Young Democrats of NC The Coalition to Protect All NC Families will join forces with the Young Democrats of North Carolina in an effort to educate voters across Mecklenburg County. Volunteers will help collect pledge cards against Amendment One and canvas neighborhoods to encourage voter turnout on May 8. 10 a.m.–4 p.m. NCDP Headquarters, 301 E. 9th St. For more information, contact RFD Ashlei K. Blue, ashkashblue@gmail.com. April 8 • Winston-Salem Tea Dance/Winston-Salem A portion of the drink proceeds benefits AIDS Care Service. No cover. Free food. Music by DJ Cash. Encore, 411 W. 4th St. 5-8 p.m. 336918-0902. outatthemovieswinston.org. April 9 • Chapel Hill Reading of ‘8’ PlayMakers Repertory Company is proud to announce a one-night-only staged reading of “8,” a play chronicling the historic trial in the federal constitutional challenge to California’s Proposition 8, written by Academy Awardwinning screenwriter and AFER Founding Board Member Dustin Lance Black. 7:30 p.m. Paul Green Theatre, Center for Dramatic Art, Country Club Rd. playmakersrep.org/8reading. April 14 • Charlotte Celebration of the Arts Time Out Youth and Vito Abate, with support from Drake Dentistry, present Celebration of the Arts for one special night. Doors open at 6:30 p.m. Show starts at 7:30 p.m. $25. Theatre Charlotte, 501 Queens Rd. Contact Time Out

Youth for more information and to purchase tickets. 704-344-8335. Timeoutyouth.org. April 14 • Raleigh 4th Annual Jack Crum Conference on Prophetic Ministry A gathering of people of all faiths to honor the tradition of faith-based social justice by coming together to worship, learn, share meals and stories and get engaged in a social justice issue immediately threatening our communities. This year’s conference will focus on mobilizing people of faith to defeat the so called “marriage amendment” and protect All NC families from the discriminatory harms it would cause. All day event. Registration required. Fairmont United Methodist Church, 2501 Clark Ave. For more information, contact jcrumconference@gmail.com. April 15 • Charlotte ‘Love Free or Die’ screening Bishop Gene Robinson is a man whose two defining passions — his love for God and for his partner Mark — are considered to be in direct conflict by some. “Love Free or Die” focuses on those, like Robinson, whose lives hang in the balance as churches and states battle for LGBT equality. The film is relevant and poignant and the hosts are proud to host a Charlotte viewing just weeks before the NC Amendment One vote on May 8. Dessert and conversation to follow the screening. 4 p.m. Myer’s Park Baptist Church, Heaton Hall, 1900 Queens Rd. mpbconline.org.

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April 19 • Charlotte ‘The Bible: The complete word of God (abridged)’ Three actors are about to tell you the entire (abridged) story from Genesis to Revelations (and most of everything in between). Get ready for a fast-paced, quick-witted comedy … but most of all — a hilarious trip through the greatest story ever accepted as fact. Show will also play April 21, 22, 24, 26, 28 and 29. 7:30 p.m. Petra’s Piano Bar, 1919 Commonwealth Ave. petraspianobar.com.

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April 21 • Cary ‘8’ by Dustin Lance Black One-night-only staged reading of “8,” a play chronicling the historic trial in the federal constitutional challenge to California’s Proposition 8. Based on the actual words of the trial transcripts, first-hand observations of the courtroom drama and interviews with the plaintiffs and the families. Admission is free but reservations are required. 8 p.m. Cary Academy’s Fine & Performing Arts Center, 1500 North Harrison Ave. realtheatre.org. April 22 - 23 • Charlotte Actor’s Theatre reading of ‘8’ Actor’s Theatre of Charlotte, with license from the American Foundation for Equal Rights (AFER) and Broadway Impact, is proud to announce a two-night-only reading of “8,” a play chroni-

cling the historic trial in the federal constitutional challenge to California’s Proposition 8, written by Academy Award-winning screenwriter and AFER Founding Board Member Dustin Lance Black. $8 for tickets. Performance starts at 8 p.m. Actor’s Theatre of Charlotte, 650 E. Stonewall St. actorstheatrecharlotte.org.

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March 31-April 13 . 2012

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March 31-April 13 . 2012