QNotes April 16-29, 2011

April 16-29 . 2011

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qnotes

April 16-29 . 2011

inside April 16-29, 2011 Vol 25 No 25

12 a&e/life&style

11 news & features 6 8 9 9

News Notes: Regional Briefs Walks to remember Charlotte city attorney to retire Amendment filed in state House

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Judy Garland at Carnegie Hall Pride Charlotte moves Uptown Let me see y’all one, two step Drag Rag Tell Trinity Out in the Stars On Being a Gay Parent Q events calendar

opinions & views 4 4 5 5

Editor’s Note TalkBack General Gayety QPoll

contributors this issue

Leah Cagle, Matt Comer, Kevin Grooms/Miss Della, Charlene Lichtenstein, Lainey Millen, Leslie Robinson, David Stout, Jim Thompson, Trinity, Brett Webb-Mitchell

front page Graphic Design by Lainey Millen

Pride Publishing & Typesetting, Inc. Editor: Matt Comer, x202 editor@goqnotes.com P.O. Box 221841, Charlotte, NC 28222, ph 704.531.9988 fx 704.531.1361 Assoc. Ed.: David Stout, x210 editor2@goqnotes.com Publisher: Jim Yarbrough Assoc. Ed., A&E: Leah Cagle, x202 arts@goqnotes.com Sales: x206 adsales@goqnotes.com Production: Lainey Millen, x209 production@goqnotes.com Nat’l Sales: Rivendell Media, 212.242.6863 Printed on recycled paper.

Material in qnotes is copyrighted by Pride Publishing & Typesetting © 2011 and may not be reproduced in any manner without written consent of the editor or publisher. Advertisers assume full responsibility — and therefore, all liability — for securing reprint permission for copyrighted text, photographs and illustrations or trademarks published in their ads. The sexual orientation of advertisers, photographers, writers, cartoonists we publish is neither inferred nor implied. The appearance of names or photographs does not indicate the subject’s sexual orientation. qnotes nor its publisher assumes liability for typographical error or omission, beyond offering to run a correction. Official editorial positions are expressed in staff editorials and editorial notations and are determined by editorial staff. The opinions of contributing writers and guest columnists do not necessarily represent the opinions of qnotes or its staff. qnotes accepts unsolicited editorial, but cannot take responsibility for its return.

Editor reserves the right to accept and reject material as well as edit for clarity, brevity.

April 16-29 . 2011

qnotes

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editor’s note by matt comer matt@goqnotes.com

McCarley’s sad legacy a reminder of inequality

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There is one thing for which City Attorney Mac McCarley will be remembered by many LGBT and straight ally Charlotteans when he departs his job at the end of the year.

(See story, “Charlotte city attorney to retire,” on page 9.) Though I have no idea how he personally feels about LGBT people — and, therefore, cannot call him a bigot — one thing is clear: McCarley’s actions and legal opinions have significantly harmed our community and prevented any substantial and concrete forward movement on LGBT inclusion in city policies and ordinances. In short, McCarley is an enabler of continued bigotry, discrimination and prejudice.

McCarley’s stubborn hardheadedness in the face of LGBT progress — or lack thereof — in the Queen City is a blemish on what might otherwise be a stunning legacy after his 34 years of public service in North Carolina.

It’s like beating a dead horse, you know. It can be very tiring writing about the same old, same old lack of progress here in Charlotte.

More than two decades after our state capital and it’s neighboring city took steps toward LGBT inclusion, Charlotte remains dead last.

Obviously, gay and transgender citizens, voters and taxpayers don’t rank high on Queen City politicians’ list of concerns. We never have. I’m starting to think we never will.

All this frustration can be blamed primarily on just a handful of people: city council members, McCarley and Mayors Pat McCrory and Anthony Foxx.

We’ve already ousted McCrory. McCarley is leaving at the end of the year. Perhaps it is time for a change in Democratic leadership on the council this year, as well.

Come November, the city will again elect a new council and mayor. And, nearly two years after LGBT Charlotteans were promised change by Foxx and other current city officials, we continue to wait. Will we see progress between now and November? I hope so. If we don’t, at least I know which candidates won’t be receiving my vote.

There’s nothing we can do about McCarley. The damage he’s caused is done.

His legacy, however, can serve as a reminder of our continued inequality in this city. We can use it to inspire movement and change, if only we care enough to make that commitment.

As city election campaigns ramp up in

the following weeks and months, don’t be afraid to ask tough questions of incumbents and challengers. Reserve your endorsements and contributions for folks who make bold and public commitments for equality. Strip your support away from those who, lacking political courage and conviction, failed to take action when they had the opportunity. This, my friends, is democracy at it’s finest. We can make a difference.

Fortunately, McCarley will no longer be waiting in the wings ready to smack down any opening at progress. With the right council and mayor, Charlotte won’t have to be dead last any longer.

‘Sex in the park?’ critics need primer on logic In our print edition on April 2, qnotes published an investigative commentary exploring Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department (CMPD) records on charges and arrests for soliciting a crime against nature. (See “Sex in the park?” at goqnotes.com/10621.)

The inquiry was prompted by local news station WBTV’s outlandish and sensationalistic tabloidism, in which they took to a local Charlotte park to stir prejudice and fear while armed only with anonymous postings from a hook-up website. Unlike WBTV’s sorry excuse for ethical journalism, qnotes actually took the time to review dozens of records and interview police officials before publishing our story.

Our results were astonishing: Of 325 charges for soliciting a crime against nature, only 15 arrests were made as the result of men who have sex with men (MSM) in a public place like a park or the airport overlook.

What’s more, the bulk of charges and arrests were linked to narcotics and heterosexual prostitution activity. And, of the 15 arrests of MSM, none occurred in James Boyce Park, which WBTV claimed had a serious problem.

Despite all our efforts at engaging in real journalism, we still had our critics. Steve Parker, who publishes Carolina Christian News and who identifies as “ex-gay,” took to qnotes’ comment threads. He cited our interview with CMPD Vice & Narcotics Unit Leader Sgt. B.D. Hollar and concluded that low arrest numbers indicated a lack of enforcement rather than a lack of a real problem.

“In other words, the reasons there haven’t

These rates only cover a portion of our true cost, however, our goal is to serve our community

been a great deal of arrests is because the police have not been enforcing these laws in the parks, choosing instead to focus on prostitution,” Parker wrote. “Anyone with any knowledge of the subject is well aware that there are a great many men seeking sex with one another at rest areas, public rest rooms, and, yes, public parks. To deny this is ludicrous.”

Parker added, “…to act as though it doesn’t exist is demonstrates the same lack of journalistic integrity of which the author accuses WBTV.” Parker conveniently chose to ignore several other portions of Hollar’s interview, specifically Hollar’s statement that his unit is primarily complaint-driven. In fact, Hollar specifically mentioned Kilborne Park as a place where police had recently responded to several complaints. Arrest records corroborate Hollar’s statements.

Despite Parker’s claims and taking into account Hollar’s full statements would it not stand to reason that complaint-driven law enforcement might receive complaints about an “alleged” large amount of open sexual activity

talkback Letters to the editor and comments from goqnotes.com.

Web comments are not edited for grammar or punctuation.

Anti-gay tyranny In response to the Matt Comer’s April 2 column, “Marching backward to the beat of a despotic drum” (goqnotes.com/10604), readers say: And on another domestic front, the dominionists in Iowa removed three state supreme court justices to punish them for upholding principles of equal protection. Don’t these cretins realize that once you hamstring equal protection principles in application to one group, you hurt protections for yourselves?

We are all minorities in someone else’s scheme.

— Marco Luxe, web, April 2 You sound like a lunatic. This article represents one of the many reasons why the vast majority of Americans oppose gay marriage (and yes, they do, despite the bogus polling a few firms have decided to release). A radical conservative, the opposite from you, could just as easily create a nightmare fantasy scenario describing what may happen if gay marriage or homosexuality in general were to become more accepted in our society. Of course,

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qnotes

www.charlottebusinessguild.org April 16-29 . 2011

that would be silly, just like all the nonsense that you wrote. ... I am gay, and I oppose gay marriage, as do many normal gay people. I will work hard to have my point of view heard here in NC, so that we can finally pass a marriage amendment here. I grew up in Massachusetts and really don’t feel like seeing my new home state slide downhill as well.

— Steve, web, April 2 @Steve — There are most certainly radical theocratic forces in North Carolina actively seeking to marginalize the LGBT citizens of North Carolina and the current limited rights of LGBT North Carolinians.

For evidence, visit christianactionleague. org or ncfpc.org or returnamerica.org.

These groups (Christian Action League, NC Family Policy Council, Return America) lobby the legislature, file lawsuits, and produce “educational” materials to further their bigoted ends.

These are simple facts evident and trumpeted on their own websites. It is not hyperbole to note their actions and self-proclaimed aspirations.

— Appellation, web, April 3

Tuesday, April 19, 2011 J.D. Lewis and “Twelve in Twelve” A philanthropic trip around the world with his two sons Lesbian & Gay Community Center 820 Hamilton St. Cash Bar Social/Heavy Hor d’oeuvres @ 5:30 pm Program starts @ 6:45 pm $20 Call 704.565.5075 or email businessguild@yahoo.com for more information or pay online via PayPal at www.charlottebusinessguild.org

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in James Boyce Park? Would it not stand to reason that area police would act upon such complaints? And, would it not also mean that such complaints might turn up at least one arrest in the park in question during more than a year’s time?

Yet, there were no significant complaints.

No recorded arrests. Even after WBTV’s and qnotes’ coverage there’s been just one call for service for prostitution-related loitering in the James Boyce Park area. Even that one complaint yielded no arrest.

Do the math and you come to a solid conclusion. There is no substantial problem with MSM sexual activity in Mecklenburg County’s public parks.

Unlike Parker, I won’t go so far as to accuse him of a lack of integrity. I’ll simply assume he wasn’t intending to twist facts into a dishonest conclusion; though, it is clear that someone either didn’t take basic-level philosophy lessons in high school or failed them miserably.

In the face of such strong evidence and logic, Parker would be wise to remember: “The truth shall set you free.” : :

by leslie robinson :: qnotes contributor

The fabric of our lives We Americans like to express ourselves with our chests.

I’m not speaking of Jane Russell or even Arnold Schwarzenegger.

I’m talking about our proclivity for wearing T-shirts with slogans on them. Americans have been human billboards for decades.

The slogans on T-shirts celebrate, advocate, advertise, unify, decry and polarize.

Americans have lots to say — on shirts made in Honduras.

So, it makes sense that one part of the gay story in this country is being played out in cotton/polyester blends. Over the past years high school students and younger kids on both sides of the gay issue have been wearing their hearts on their sleeves. And, getting sent home for it.

The latest shirt-skirmish is still unfolding at a middle school in DeSoto Parish in Louisiana. Student Dawn Henderson wore a shirt reading “Some Kids are Gay. That’s OK.” Principal Keith Simmons ordered her to change her shirt or go home.

It occurs to me that any kid aiming to get out of a test at school doesn’t need to fake

qpoll

the flu — just don a controversial T-shirt and in minutes you’ll be back home watching “Judge Judy.”

According to the ACLU of Louisiana, DeSoto school officials claimed the shirt was “distracting.” The ACLU sent Simmons a letter arguing that Henderson has a First Amendment right to express her opinion across her chest, as long as the school allows clothing with slogans.

If the school decides to forbid clothing with slogans, it might be hearing from Nike.

In another T-shirt to-do, which actually began back in 2006, the 7th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled a month ago that students at Neuqua Valley High School in Naperville, Ill., could wear T-shirts saying “Be Happy, Not Gay.” The court maintained a “school that permits advocacy of the rights of homosexual students cannot be allowed to stifle criticism of homosexuality.”

May the judges’ T-shirts ride up with wear.

On Nov. 2 last year, Election Day, senior Kate Cohn made a pro-gay statement at Falcon High School in Peyton, Colo., by wearing a shirt reading “Marriage is so gay.” She said Principal Mark Carara told her the shirt was offensive and violated the dress code forbidding clothing potentially disruptive to the academic environment.

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general gayety

I’m guessing that means fishnets are out. At least for guys.

Cohn’s mom said Carara later likened the T-shirt to apparel promoting alcohol or drug use.

That increasingly well-known arbiter of fashion, the ACLU, sent a letter to school administrators demanding Cohn and others be allowed to wear the shirt and the two-week ban was lifted.

Perfect. Two weeks gave her enough time to wash her shirt and make it all pretty for its re-debut.

I can say with certainty that T-shirt tizzies haven’t been limited to the younger set or the recent past. Back in the mid-’90s I covered a protest by adults in Hampton Beach, N.H., outside a T-shirt store that peddled a couple of anti-gay shirts. One read “Silly faggot, dicks are for chicks” and the other said “Aids Kills Fags” or something of that ilk.

What I remember best is a teenager pointedly buying one of those shirts during the protest, then sheepishly returning it afterwards because he needed the money to get home.

The other day I spotted a different T-shirt twist to the American LGBT story. Openly gay veteran political consultant Fred Karger, in Washington, D.C., to file for the Republican presidential nomination, met with the Republican National Committee chairman.

Karger — completely unknown to the public and, to repeat, openly gay — told “Roll Call,” “We had a great meeting. I gave him one of my T-shirts.”

I’d like to know what slogan is on that shirt. Maybe “Karger 2012: No, Really.” : : info:

LesRobinson@aol.com . generalgayety.com

Federal courts have ruled consistently that students’ rights to free speech and expression while at school extend to their wardrobe. LGBT students have benefited from these rulings, but should other students be allowed to wear clothing with antiLGBT messages?

See the options and vote: goqnotes.com/to/qpoll

April 16-29 . 2011

qnotes

BRIEFS

news notes: from the carolinas, nation and world compiled by Lainey Millen :: lainey@goqnotes.com | David Stout :: david@goqnotes.com | Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com between a man and a woman or be chaste.” References to sexual orientation would have been removed if it has passed.

All 173 presbyteries across the U.S. will have to come to a consensus by May. The approval of a total of 87 presbyteries are needed for the proposal to take effect.

— L.M.

Advocacy group on pulse of equality efforts

RALEIGH — This year, amidst the rise of a Republican-led legislature which has already brought an anti-LGBT constitutional amendment to the floor of both chambers, Equality North Carolina (ENC) has it’s plate full.

Want to lend your support to help thwart anti-gay legislators’ designs? Then take action with ENC by joining their email and postcard campaigns to convince lawmakers to work on the side of fairness and equality. At press time, over 10,000 Equality in Action cards has been sent out to a variety of people to help educate them about how bad the anti-LGBT amendment is to North Carolina’s LGBT citizens. All across the state, there have been stops on the Equality in Action Tour. These local town hall meetings help to raise funds for initiatives, educate participants on hot topics and energize those who want to become engaged in the valuable work of ENC. Daytime office volunteers are still urgently needed to mobilize the postcard campaign.

Future nighttime volunteer opportunities are also available. Contact organizer Josh Wynne at josh@equalitync.org or 919-829-0343, ext. 113 to learn more.

Additionally, there’s no time like a party, and ENC is encouraging everyone to host a fundraising party to help collect the necessary war chest that is needed to defend it’s initiatives. For details on how to throw one of these fun-filled events,

Charlotte TOY seeks volunteers

CHARLOTTE — Time Out Youth is currently searching for volunteers to staff its 20th Anniversary Gala Weekend, June 10-13.

The highlight of the weekend is a gala fundraiser, an evening honoring what Time Out Youth has done and continues to do to strengthen the community.

On June 11, Glam, an alternative prom for youth, is slated as part of the festivities.

Sponsors, either individual or corporate, are also needed for their platinum event.

The organization is also co-sponsoring the premier of “Rent” on May 12 at Theatre Charlotte. Appetizers, dessert and a silent auction are being planned. Volunteers are needed between 5:30-10 p.m. Complimentary tickets for another show will be made available to those who serve.

For more information, email volunteers@ timeoutyouth.org or visit timeoutyouth.org.

— L.M.

Couples wed in D.C.

CHARLOTTE — Seven couples spent the weekend of April 1-3 in the nation’s capital while they tied the knot with family, friends and clergy as witnesses.

The couples were forced to travel to D.C. for their ceremonies because North Carolina does not recognize marriages by same-sex couples. An anti-gay constitutional amendment proposed in the state Senate would

qnotes

April 16-29 . 2011

Triad New center improves AIDS care

GREENSBORO — Moses Cone Health System has partnered with three agencies, including Triad Health Project, to open their new Regional Center for Infectious Disease. The facility, which opened April 4 across the street from Moses H. Cone Memorial Hospital, promises to greatly improve care for people with HIV, AIDS and other infectious diseases.

By partnering with other HIV/ AIDS providers, it will offer multiple services for patients in one convenient setting.

The Center has a nurse practitioner and also has space for two case managers from Triad Health Project and one mental health counselor from Family Service of the Piedmont.

Those two community agencies worked with The Infectious Disease Clinic in the past when it was located in the basement of Moses Cone Hospital.

The long-term vision to develop the center came from Dr. John Campbell, an infectious disease physician with the Internal Medicine Training Program at Moses Cone Health System.

The Cone Health Foundation, Central Carolina Health Network and the University of North Carolina are providing funds including federal funding totaling $1,237,468, a total 55 percent of the Center’s budget.

— compiled from release

visit equalitync.org/news1/theres-never-been-abetter-time-to-party-for-equality.

ENC also encourages everyone to support the companies who lend their hand to champion equality in the workplace. It is currently seeking companies who are willing to take a stand against the anti-LGBT amendment. North Carolina has a number of companies who score high on the Human Rights Campaign Corporate Index. But, that might not be enough. Employers who want to get on board should contact Kay Flaminio at kay@equalitync.org. Whether one can take a public stand or help ENC communicate with key legislative leaders, help them take bottom line strategic action that will make a real difference for protecting the dignity of North Carolina’s LGBT community.

For more information, to volunteer or to make a contribution, visit equalitync.org.

— L.M.

make such a ban more stringent, banning recognition of “domestic legal union” by same-sex couples, including civil unions, marriages and domestic partnerships.

The ceremonies were officiated by Rev. Nancy Ellett Allison of Holy Covenant United Church of Christ, Rabbi Judy Schindler of Temple Beth El and Rev. Robin Tanner of Piedmont Unitarian Universalist Church.

Several other local congregations supported the initiative, including Pilgrim Congregational UCC of Charlotte, Unitarian Universalist Church of Charlotte, Unity Fellowship Church Charlotte and Wedgewood Baptist Church. Sponsoring organizations included RAIN, Time Out Youth, attorney Connie J. Vetter and the Human Rights Campaign.

On April 4, a special “Celebratory Champagne Toast” was held. During the event, Rev.Jay Leach, along with Rev. Dr. Chris Ayers and others, blessed and toasted the couples upon their return.

— M.C.

Eastern Presbytery says no

ELIZABETHTOWN — The eastern North Carolina governing body of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.) gave a thumbs down to a proposal from the national church body to allow gay and lesbian clergy.

The Presbytery of Coastal Carolina voted against the proposal by a nearly 2-to-1 margin. The church’s current Book of Order states that its clergy must be in a “faithful marriage

Triangle Public forum held

CARRBORO — Students and youth gathered at Open Eye Cafe, 101 S. Greensboro St., at an open mic Speak Out after the Day of Silence. It was sponsored by iNSIDEoUT. On the previous day, countless participants across the nation refrained from speaking for a full day to raise awareness and express their solidarity with LGBT youth who remain muted and isolated. Every day, they face disproportionate rates of harassment and bullying in schools, as well as an increased tendency for self-injury, suicide and depression. The Speak Out was an opportunity for students to share their stories with an audience in public about their experiences observing the Day of Silence and being lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning or allied in school, more generally.

The event is a project of the Gay, Lesbian,

Straight Education Network (GLSEN). In 2005, GLSEN’s National School Climate Survey found that more than 64 percent of LGBT students reported verbal, sexual or physical harassment at school and 29 percent reported missing at least a day of school in the past month out of fear for their personal safety.

Discrimination and harassment is widely overlooked by school administrators due in part to the lack of effective bullying policies, said iNSIDEoUT representative Amy Glaser.

The School Violence Prevention Act, which was passed in 2009, is supposed to help protect youth against bullying. Equality North Carolina has prepared a kit to assist systems in the implementation of the law.

For more information, visit iNSIDEoUT180. org and equalitync.org.

— L.M.

Conference tackles bullying

RALEIGH — North Carolina State University held a statewide conference on March 29 to assist educators and students in dealing with harassment in elementary and secondary schools.

Attendees focused on finding ways to implement the state’s School Violence Prevention Act throughout an entire school.

Also, intervention and parental support methodology were addressed.

WRAL reported, “Justine Hollingshead, director of N.C. State’s Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Center, said school administrators, teachers and counselors need to take the initiative to stop bullying.”

Worsening the issue is the “advent of online bullying.”

Morgan Hayes, a seventh grade student at North Garner Middle School, attended the event for a Girl Scout project with a friend.

She is spearheading an effort to have her school become a no-bully zone.

— L.M.

Exec supports gay rights

RALEIGH — Workplace Options President Alan King says that “being gay doesn’t define my ability to do my job well. I don’t wrap myself in a rainbow flag,” the News and Observer reported.

His company is the lead sponsor of OutRaleigh, which is taking place on May 14. And, that is only the tip of the iceberg.

He thinks that this event is just the place to make a “visible statement in the community we live…and celebrate diversity…thus being viewed as a model in the business world.”

Workplace Options is an employee assistance program company and provides wellness programs, backup care for children and elderly parents, diversity training, financial counseling, mental-health support and more.

It employs 325 people worldwide. Most of them, 240, work in Raleigh.

They have concern over the Republicancontrolled General Assembly’s efforts to restrict gay rights, like the gay marriage ban.

The News and Observer said, “A recent survey of N.C. workers by Public Policy Polling, a firm that’s owned by [Workplace Options CEO] Dean Debnam, showed that about one in four said they would be uncomfortable if a co-worker or boss was openly gay.”

“It’s valuable for this region’s gay and lesbian community to have the support of businesses and of leaders such as King.…

The fact that Alan is out and rewarded and supported for being out means so much for other professionals,” Daire Roebuck, who serves on the LGBT Center board and is an attorney, concluded.

— L.M.

National

Kerry leads on immigration equality

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Sen. John Kerry (D-MA) led 11 colleagues in an April 6 letter to Attorney General Eric Holder and Secretary of Homeland Security Janet Napolitano urging immigration equality for legally married samesex couples who are currently discriminated against under the Defense of Marriage Act. “We applaud the President’s decision to no longer defend the Defense of Marriage Act in federal court,” the senators wrote. “With DOMA as law, however, we are creating a tier of second-class families in states that have

authorized same-sex marriage. The same second-class status is imposed upon marriages between same-sex partners in which one spouse is not a U.S. citizen. We urge you to reconsider this position in light of the administration’s position that it will no longer defend DOMA in federal court.”

Rachel B. Tiven, executive director of Immigration Equality, a national organization that works to end discrimination in U.S. immigration law, has also called for a change.

— D.S.

tation and gender identity data; and promoting health profession training programs to include LGBT cultural competency curricula.

HHS will take additional steps, integrating an even stronger component focusing on LGBT youth in all anti-bullying initiatives, reducing the barriers encountered by prospective and current foster and adoptive parents who are LGBT, and requiring all organizations serving runaway and homeless youth to be equipped to serve LGBT youth.

— D.S.

LGBT Health, Part I

Study: 9 million LGBT Americans

WASHINGTON, D.C. — National health think tank The Institute of Medicine issued a report March 31 detailing health disparities between LGBT and non-LGBT Americans and calling for substantially increased federal research into the medical concerns of LGBT people. The report, “The Health of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender People: Building a Foundation for Better Understanding,” is meant to be a wake-up call for government researchers and policymakers who have resisted asking LGBT-specific questions in federal health surveys.

— D.S.

LGBT Health, Part II

WASHINGTON, D.C. — On April 1, the Department of Health and Human Services announced a number of steps it was recommending to President Barack Obama to improve the health and well-being of LGBT Americans.

The recommendations include prohibiting workplace bias on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity for HHS programs and employees; increasing the number of federallyfunded health surveys that collect sexual orien-

LOS ANGELES, Calif. — The Williams Institute, a leading think tank dedicated to the field of sexual orientation and gender identity-related law and public policy, has released new research that estimates the size of the LGBT community in the U.S. Drawing on information from four recent national and two state-level population-based surveys, the analyses suggest that there are more than 8 million American adults who are lesbian, gay or bisexual, comprising 3.5 percent of the adult population. There are also nearly 700,000 transgender individuals in the U.S. In total, the study suggests that approximately 9 million Americans — roughly the population of New Jersey — identify as LGBT. — D.S.

Victory in Ark., Part I

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — The Arkansas Supreme Court has upheld a lower court ruling that a law prohibiting adoption by unmarried couples who live together violates the Arkansas Constitution. On Nov. 4, 2008, Arkansas voters approved a statutory ban on adoption and foster parenting by unmarried individuals co-

habiting with a sexual partner. The April 7 ruling affirms a Pulaski County circuit judge decision that Initiated Act I of 2008 intrudes on privacy rights guaranteed by the Arkansas Constitution.

The victory leaves Mississippi and Utah as the only states with adoption bans for unmarried couples, including same-sex couples.

— D.S.

Victory in Ark., Part II

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — Advocates for LGBT youth and education praised Gov. Beebe’s April 1 signing of a comprehensive anti-bullying bill that enumerates personal characteristics often targeted for bullying, including race, religion, sexual orientation and gender identity. The bill, which also requires educator training, had overwhelming support from legislators of all parties and passed unanimously in the state Senate. Arkansas is the 11th state to pass an enumerated anti-bullying law. The others that have such laws are California, Illinois, Iowa, Maryland, New Jersey, New York, North Carolina, Oregon, Vermont and Washington.

— D.S.

Global British HIV rates up sharply

LONDON, U.K. — New Health Protection Agency figures show that HIV infections among gay and bisexual men in the U.K. have risen by 70 percent in the last decade. In 2001, 1,810 men who have sex with men were diagnosed with the disease. Last year, the number had risen to 3,080. It is estimated that there are 30,000 gay and bisexual men living with HIV in the U.K. today, although one-third of these are thought to be undiagnosed.

— D.S.

April 16-29 . 2011

qnotes

Walks to remember Carolina AIDS walks raise awareness, funds during time of need

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

While it would be difficult to overstate the importance of AIDS Walk fundraisers in the battle against HIV and AIDS, the events themselves couldn’t be much simpler.

Participants solicit donations from family and friends before gathering together on event day to walk a pre-determined course through town. For some Walks, a registration fee is collected in lieu of pledges. In either case, all money raised goes to one or more local AIDS charities.

As in the past several years, this year’s slew of events across the state will play an important role in raising both much-needed funding and awareness for AIDS services organizations and the crucial role they play in the health and well-being of their communities. But, 2011 also holds other important and symbolic meanings marking the 30th anniversary of the AIDS Crisis. On June 5.

1981, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reported on the first cases of what would eventually be named Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome, or AIDS. From five, sick young men in Los Angeles, the Crisis grew. A lack of government response in the face of thousands of deaths nationwide sparked action.

Short walks, long histories The concept isn’t new or unique to AIDS fundraising — the CROP Walk to fight hunger and poverty has successfully used this charity model since the late ’60s. What is different, however, is the politically charged climate from which the AIDS Walk movement emerged.

The first AIDS Walk was held in Los Angeles in 1985 to benefit AIDS Project Los Angeles. Four years in and with the U.S. death toll approaching 5,000, the epidemic was still being treated like a radioactive social issue rather than a critical health concern.

President Ronald Reagan mentioned the word “AIDS” in public for the first time in ’85, and then only in response to a reporter’s questions. Congress’ anemic funding for care and research showed no signs that lawmakers considered AIDS a priority issue either.

Among the public, the belief that people with AIDS could be divided into innocent victims (hemophiliacs, babies born to infected mothers) and the deserving (gays, drug users) was still widespread. Lingering fear about how the disease could be spread fueled pervasive ostracism and discrimination against the infected.

From this dire environment sprang the first AIDS Walk, which is significant both for the fact that it established a means for the community to raise life-saving aid money that the government wasn’t providing, as well as for the courage of the walkers who braved the stigma associated with AIDS. Following on the heels of the L.A. walkers were participants at similar events in New York and San Francisco. Before long, AIDS Walks were being organized in cities from coast to coast, including the Carolinas where multiple events are held across the region each year.

Trying times Last year, North Carolina’s community of HIV/AIDS patients were hit with devastating blows. As the state legislature faced loom-

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April 16-29 . 2011

ing budget deficits, officials with the N.C. Department of Health’s HIV/STD Prevention and Care Branch announced enrollment in the state’s AIDS Drug Assistance Program (ADAP) would be capped at current levels. Though low-income HIV/AIDS patients who were already enrolled would continue to receive medicines, hundreds were put on a waiting list that eventually became the longest in the nation.

Leaders like the Rev. Debbie Warren of Charlotte’s Regional AIDS Interfaith Network (RAIN), Addison Ore of Greensboro’s Triad Health Project and John Paul Womble of Raleigh’s Alliance of AIDS Services-Carolina sprang into action. With the advocacy of state AIDS and STD director Jacquelyn Clymore, North Carolina eventually passed a budget that included restored funds for the program, though eligibility levels were reduced.

Ore says the funding crisis that AIDS service providers and patients faced last year is still taking its toll, though potential future cuts could be worse.

“It’s all up for debate,” she says.

“There are no sacred cows anymore.”

State legislators usually deal with budgetary matters in their biennial short session. That’s when last year’s ADAP funding was restored and passed. But this year, the state faces a $2.7 billion deficit — down $1 billion when the legislature opened this year’s session in January. That’s spawned efforts to cut spending and some legislators have put AIDS funding on the chopping block.

In January, state Rep. Larry Brown, a Republican who represents portions of eastern Forsyth County, told The Winston-Salem Journal that state government shouldn’t be funding HIV/AIDS treatment for those who “caused it by the way they live.”

“I’m not opposed to helping a child born with HIV or something,” Brown told the paper, “but I don’t condone spending taxpayers’ money to help people living in perverted lifestyles.”

Brown’s remarks on HIV/AIDS funding were quickly condemned by statewide advocates.

“These comments are completely unacceptable,” Ian Palmquist, Equality North Carolina’s executive director, said in a release at the time. “Larry Brown is out of touch with the people of North Carolina, who strongly support programs to care for the most vulnerable among us, and he’s out of step with his own party.”

Brown had previously caused controversy after calling gays “queers” and “fruitloops” in an email to his Republican colleagues.

Such a hostile social agenda concerns Ore, who is cautious after last November’s change in legislative leadership.

“I certainly don’t believe someone like Rep. Larry Brown speaks for the entire Republican leadership, but I think when someone speaks like that it’s indicative of a feeling.

That’s very concerning to me.”

Ore’s organization relies on a mix of support from federal, state and local funding.

“We rely more and more on what we are able to raise ourselves,” Ore says, noting de-

Participants in RAIN’s AIDS Walk Charlotte walk to remember a friend.

creases in federal grants and flat-lined local funding. “Individual donations have remained fairly stable, but we have to keep going back to the well more often. We’re starting to battle donor fatigue.”

Messages of hope, strains of advocacy Nathan Smith, RAIN’s director of development and marketing, says his organization has also felt the brunt of meager times.

“We’ve felt it like any other non-profit,” he says, noting his group had to layoff some workers when the economy initially nosedived in Charlotte a few years ago.

But Smith is quick to point out that financial hardships are standing in stark contrast to the good that often comes out of fundraisers like RAIN’s upcoming AIDS Walk Charlotte on May 7.

AIDS Walk Charlotte is RAIN’s largest fundraiser each year. It’s also one of the group’s largest public advocacy and awareness-building tools.

“We truly push and want people to understand [this issue],” he says. “That’s why we have no registration fee and we encourage middle and high school and college students who can’t raise money to come out and support us. It’s about showing the community that this is still an issue for us.”

Ore’s Triad Health Project holds their Winter Walk for AIDS each December. Ore says she’s always very intentional about stressing awareness along with fundraising.

“That’s often when we’ll get a call from local people,” she says. “It’s a great opportunity to get the word out in front of people.”

Triad Health Project is also celebrating their 25th anniversary this year, an occasion that has garnered the group more local press

and attention to the important issues that’s kept them running.

RAIN’s AIDS Walk Charlotte celebrates 15 years in May. Like Triad Health Project, RAIN has felt the pinch but feels events like their Walk help to close the gaps and create opportunities for change.

At the end of the day, Smith says RAIN isn’t going anywhere.

“We’ve been here for 19 years, and we’re going to be here until the Crisis is over,” he says. : : — David Stout contributed

Walks across Carolina May 7 • Charlotte AIDS Walk Charlotte One of the largest AIDS fundraisers across the Carolinas, AIDS Walk Charlotte raises funds for the Regional AIDS Interfaith Network. To register walk teams or learn more, visit aidswalkcharlotte.org.

May 21 • Raleigh AIDS Walk+Ride Alliance of AIDS Services-Carolina hosts their annual walk and bicycle ride in downtown Raleigh. Register walkers, learn more about the ride and more at aidswalkandride.org.

December • Greensboro Winter Walk for AIDS Triad Health Project takes to the streets of downtown Greensboro’s Aycock Neighborhood. For more information, visit traidhealthproject.com.

For more events see our Q Events Calendar on page 19.

Charlotte city attorney to retire Mac McCarley’s legal opinions blocked LGBT progress in Charlotte

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Charlotte City Attorney Mac McCarley told the city council in closed session on April 4 that he plans to retire at the end of December, according to The Charlotte Observer. McCarley, whose position is hired by the city council, has served as city attorney since 1994. His legal opinions have often been the source of frustration for LGBT community members.

In 2009, the city was sued by a fired, transgender employee. At the time, McCarley

said the city would not take responsibility in the case.

“Transgendered individuals do not have any rights under the federal employment discrimination laws,” he said.

The City of Charlotte does not have employment ordinances prohibiting discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender-identity, though City Manager Curt Walton instituted an administrative policy

last year prohibiting discrimination on sexual orientation.

McCarley has insisted the city council lacks the authority to pass an employment non-discrimination ordinance or policy inclusive of “sexual orientation.”

In a Feb. 23, 2010, memo from McCarley to Walton, McCarley said federal law in Title VII does not prohibit discrimination based on sexual orientation. The city charter, he said,

Charlotte City Attorney Mac McCarley intends to retire at the end of December.

also limits the city’s non-discrimination statement to those characteristics already listed (race, religion, color, sex, national origin, age, disability, and political affilation).

In the memo, McCarley said Walton’s 2010 administrative policy change is the “most le-

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Anti-gay amendment filed in N.C. House House wording slightly narrower than harsh Senate version

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

RALEIGH — An anti-gay constitutional amendment that could strip away marriage rights for same-sex couples was filed April 6 in the North Carolina House of Representatives.

A similar amendment was introduced to the Senate in late February. The House version, filed by two Republicans and two Democrats, contains different wording that could slightly narrow the impact of the amendment.

“Marriage is the union of one man and one woman at one time. No other relationship shall be recognized as a valid marriage by the State,” the House amendment reads.

The Senate’s version says no other “domestic legal union” will be recognized.

LGBT advocates with the statewide group Equality North Carolina say marriage

— already denied to same-sex couples by state statute — isn’t the only right that could be banned by the proposed Senate version.

Civil unions and domestic partner benefits could also be subject to prohibition. Several municipalities across the state offer health and other benefits to same-sex partners of their employees; those include Durham, Mecklenburg and Orange Counties, as well as the cities or towns of Carrboro, Chapel Hill, Durham and Greensboro. Private companies, including global giants like Charlotte’s Bank of America, also offer such benefits and could be subject to the Senate amendment.

“I think it is a step in the right direction that they didn’t introduce as extreme a version as the Senate did,” Equality North Carolina Executive Director Ian Palmquist told qnotes.

“The fact remains it is still an attempt to write discrimination into our state constitution.”

The House version is sponsored by Republicans David Lewis (Harnett) and Rayne Brown (Davidson) and Democrats James Crawford, Jr. (Granville, Vance) and Dewey Hill (Brunswick, Columbus). Additionally, 35 other representatives had as of press time signed on as co-sponsors. Of the additional co-sponsors, four are Democrats and one is unaffiliated.

Palmquist indicated he had not spoken to House leadership on Wednesday, but that he and his group’s lobbyist would continue to encourage the chamber’s leadership not to bring the bill to the floor.

Republican state Sens. James Forrester (Gaston), Jerry W. Tillman (Montgomery,

Randolph) and Dan Soucek (Alexander, Ashe, Watauga, Wilkes) are the primary sponsors of the Senate version. It has been referred to the Senate Rules Committee. Twenty other senators have signed on in support.

Similar amendments, whose primary proponents have been Republicans, have been kept at bay for the past seven years. The state’s legislature flipped from a Democratic to Republican majority in last November’s midterm elections. A constitutional amendment cannot be vetoed by the governor and must gain the approval of a three-fifths majority of both chambers before proceeding to the ballot. A simple majority of voters is needed for ratification. Both the Senate and House versions of the amendment would place the amendment on next year’s November ballot. : :

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Judy at Carnegie Hall: 50 years later Commemorating Judy Garland’s historic performance at Carnegie Hall

by Jim Thompson :: guest contributor

April 23, 1961 will mark the 50th anniversary of what was probably the greatest evening in show business history. Over 3,000 lucky people packed the world-famous Carnegie Hall in New York City to see Judy Garland.

We are lucky enough that this evening was recorded live and complete and has been transforming fans for the last 50 years to front row seats to hear and experience Judy Garland, her charm, charisma, presence and her truly marvelous voice in full form.

New York Herald Tribune reported on that evening this way: “There was an extra bonus at Carnegie Hall last night, Judy Garland sang.” New York Post said: “Last night the magnetism was circulating from the moment she stepped on stage.”

All accounts of that night hailed the Carnegie Hall concert as a triumph.

Variety, the periodical of record for the show business industry, reported: “New York’s Carnegie Hall was supercharged on both sides of the footlights Sunday evening … Pandemonium broke loose and a standing ovation stalled the song fest for several moments. After her twenty-fourth number of the evening, she halted the tumultuous applause demanding still another encore … Few singers around can get as much out of a song as Miss Garland … The tones are clear, the phrasing is meaningful and the vocal passion is catching. In fact, the audience couldn’t resist anything she did. The aisles were jammed during the encore … she followed with two additional numbers ‘After You’ve Gone’ and

‘Chicago’ which brought her song bag for the evening up to 26 numbers.”

“Two hours of pow,” was how Judy Garland described the event.

Clearly Judy’s performance at Carnegie Hall was a milestone in the life and career of a performer who had seen many successes in her lifetime. Judy had already experienced comebacks many times before. Today, 50 years later, people are still raving about this concert, no matter if they have heard it hundreds of times or for the first time. Even those who might not be Judy Garland fans (say it ain’t so) are hooked by this concert.

It’s particularly wonderful given the fact that a year-and-a-half earlier Judy Garland had nearly died.

“Judy At Carnegie Hall” remains her biggest selling recording. It originally stayed on the charts for 94 weeks — 13 at number one — and won her five Grammy Awards, including Best Female Vocal Performance and Album of the Year (the first time a woman to win this category). Today it is still in print and a very popular selling CD and music download.

To listen to it is to re-live what truly is the greatest night in show business history sung by the greatest entertainer in show business, Judy Garland. If you haven’t heard it, do yourself a favor and listen. If you have, listen again. You’ll smile, you’ll laugh, you’ll cry. You will love it. : : — A self-described “Friend of Dorothy,” Jim Thompson is a qnotes reader and community member. He lives in Fort Mill, S.C.

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Pride Charlotte wants to ‘stand proud’ in Uptown Pride Charlotte, slated for Aug. 27, captures the heart of the Queen City

by Leah Cagle :: leah@goqnotes.com

Pride. Inclusivity. Creativity. Diversity.

Words like these saturate the conversations surrounding this year’s Pride Charlotte festival. It only takes a brief glance at the upcoming celebration to understand just what an amazing event we have coming our way this summer.

Although Charlotte has been hosting Pride festivities since the 1970s, the process of creating a thriving LGBT community hasn’t been easy. In 2005, the non-profit Charlotte Pride organization dissolved after facing intense anti-gay backlash. But since 2006, when the Lesbian & Gay Community Center took charge of the event, Pride Charlotte has grown immensely, jumping from Gateway Village to the N.C. Music Factory and now, for 2011, to the very heart of the Queen City — Uptown Tryon St. “We are very excited to move our festival Uptown and to the heart of Charlotte’s artistic and cultural center,” Jonathan Hill, Pride

‘Teamwork makes the dream work’ Pride Charlotte needs volunteers, vendors and visionaries to help make this event possible. If you’re interested in participating, visit the Pride Charlotte website at pridecharlotte.com to learn more about volunteer opportunities and fill out a volunteer application.

Charlotte co-chair, said in a release. “The S. Tryon St. location provides a unique opportunity for our event to grow and to raise more visibility for this city’s diverse gay community.”

Organizers [Ed. Note — This publication’s editor serves on the event’s organizing committee] say the Pride festival, slated for Aug. 27, is the largest celebration of LGBT culture and community in the Carolinas. The event attracts thousands of folks — gay and ally alike — to partake in a vibrant, week-long party of artistic, culinary and cultural delight.

Organizers have been hard at work, creating new fundraising and partnership opportunities in order to offer a more diverse set of artistic events, participating organizations and entertainment.

Organizers also say the event serves as a unique opportunity for LGBT Charlotteans to declare both their presence and their worth in the greater community. Dave Webb, who also serves as Pride Charlotte co-chair, called the event a “statement of affirmation” that will show “Charlotte’s LGBT community is a vital part of the city’s cultural fabric.”

Center Board Chair John Stotler envisions the event as an inclusive, unifying and mending experience that will “build bridges within our own community and among natural allies across the metro Charlotte area.”

But Pride planners know from past experience that not everyone in attendance shares the same dream of acceptance and celebration.

“Unfortunately there are still politicians

Pride Charlotte’s 2010 festival was held at the N.C. Music Factory on the outskirts of Uptown.

and individuals in Charlotte that feel compelled to judge and condemn the gay community, but times are a-changing and the louder they protest, the more they show their true colors as agents of hate and intolerance,” Webb explains.

Pride Charlotte will again organize its coalition of volunteers known as “Partners in Peace,” dispersing them throughout the festival to help promote positive communica-

Let me see y’all one, two step Southern Country Charlotte values community, organizer says

by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Growing up gay can be hard. That’s especially true if you grow up in the South or other rural, conservative settings. Despite these hardships, many of us LGBT Southerners still long for a piece of home or clamor to embrace what we consider our “roots.” Being gay and Southern — or “country,” “redneck,” “cowboy” or whatever term of endearment you choose to identify yourself — has never been mutually exclusive.

Organizations like Southern Country Charlotte (SCC) and a host of similar groups across the nation prove it.

SCC, which holds their annual Queen City Stomp each April, was founded in 1991 and celebrates their 20th anniversary this year. Though folks come from far and wide to partake in a show of Country Western dancing, they’re also contributing toward good causes. Southern Country Charlotte has raised nearly $100,000 in cash, goods and services benefitting local non-profit groups, both within and outside of the LGBT community.

But SCC President Chris Gray says the group is about much more than Country Western dancing and fundraising. When he and his partner moved to Charlotte in 2008,

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SCC offered them welcome and friendship.

“We had gone to the Eagle one Wednesday night and they were doing dance lessons,” Gray says. “He fell in love with it and we started going every Wednesday.

The atmosphere, the people, they welcomed everybody gay or straight or whatever.”

Gray’s partner loves to dance, though Gray himself doesn’t.

“It’s what I call a spectator sport,” he says. “There’s a lot of members that don’t dance, including myself. A lot of people who come out do so just to watch and it’s amazing to watch the unison of these people dancing.”

After the late 2009 closure of the Charlotte Eagle, a gay Leather/Levi bar off South Blvd., SCC was forced to move their Queen City Stomp to the Sheraton Charlotte Airport Hotel.

There, SCC members’ love of dance and their camaraderie has overflowed and left its mark on hotel staff and guests alike.

“The relationship we built with Sheraton last year worked great,” Gray says. “They’ve been real hand-in-hand. If we needed

something they were right on it. We had no problems. Even people who were at the hotel — who weren’t gay and who just happened to be staying there — they would pay to come in and they had a blast.”

Gray says the Sheraton has even purchased a new dance floor. It mades its debut at this year’s Queen City Stomp.

The community that surrounds SCC and welcomes new members and guests extends beyond the group’s local activities and mission. SCC is a member of the International Association of Gay/Lesbian Country Western Dance Clubs (IAGLCWDC). Incorporated in Texas in 1993, the international fellowship is a member of the Gay and Lesbian International Sports Association and helps to promote both dancing balls, like Queen City Stomp, and competitions across the globe. In July, it’ll host a dancing competition at the North American OutGames in Vancouver.

Gray says SCC’s relationship with IAGLCWDC has been fruitful and Queen City Stomp has even managed to get the attention of many of the group’s members.

“We have wonderful cocktail parties,” he says. “They were the talk of the [IAGLCWDC] convention last year.”

Though SCC appreciates the praise, their mission and focus remains squarely with the people and organizations it benefits.

tion and ensure a peaceful experience for all in attendance.

Despite the inherent political implications in such an event, Dave Webb reiterates that the true spirit of the festival is communal rather than partisan.

“The Pride Charlotte festival is not a political rally, it is a peaceful gathering of the LGBT community, families and its’ supporters to celebrate our community,” he says. : :

Other upcoming hoedowns In the mood for more Country Western dance? In addition to Charlotte’s Queen City Stomp, be sure to check out these great events this season.

Seattle :: April 29-May 1 Emerald City Hoedown Hosted by Rain Country Dance Association raincountrydance.org Provincetown :: April 29-May 1 19th Annual Spring Stomp Hosted by Gays for Patsy gaysforpatsy.org Philadelphia :: May 26-29 The Philadelphia Hoedown The 18th Annual Convention of the International Association of Gay/Lesbian Country Western Dance Clubs. iaglcwdc.org — Event listings courtesy IAGLCWDC “We are able to raise money for organizations and charities while at the same time getting out and doing stuff in the community as much as we can,” he says. “Even with the economy last year, we were able to raise around $10,000. That was a great thing and we hope to keep it going.” : :

drag rag by miss della :: qnotes contributor

Queens are blooming everywhere!

“Hey y’all!” as one of my favorites, Paula Deen, would greet her folks. And, welcome back to my little neck of the woods — here since the fall of 1996! Oh my goodness, that’s a lot of drag and pageants. This time, I will talk about the three main pageants that I mentioned going to in the last Rag and, also, start off with a show that I failed to mention.

Several weeks ago, a few impersonators did what I hear was a great show of illusions down at a theater in Myrtle Beach. Then they ended up at the fabulous Rainbow House.

Those ladies of the stage included Miss Gay America Coti Collins (whom I believe organized it all), Kirby Kolby, Gigi Monroe, the highly decorated Denise Russell and the everfamous Barbra impersonator (and longtime Coti friend) Viki Williams. I know they put on one more classy show.

And, speaking of Coti, it’s only fitting that I next mention her first three prelims to Miss Gay America. The first was Mid-America, where Symphony Love Alexander took the crown, with Jade Sinclair being 1st runner-up.

Secondly, an old school queen with unfinished business won Miss Gay DC. Congrats are going out to Raleigh’s Kirby Kolby who swept every category. Her RU was Patti Lovelace.

The third was Miss MidEast here at Scorpio. It was a great contest. A past Top 5 finalist at the national contest, Chantel Reshae, won and her RU was Lindsay Starr, who really put on a good show and, although I missed her in Gown and Onstage Response, I hear she really made quite the impression. Congrats to Jessica Jade who relinquished the title that night and really served up the costumes. There were several formers and guest entertainers in the house, but the one who really surprised me was Champagne Douglas who’s still got it after all these years.

One celebrity who gets much attention and accolades from queens these days would naturally be Lady Gaga and just recently she made appearances at two gay clubs. She actually performed with Miss EOY Vanessa DeMornay at the Connection in Louisville and she popped into the Round Up in Dallas after a concert out there.

Congrats are going out to Dy’Mond Cartier who won the most recent Miss NC U.S.ofA. in Greensboro at Warehouse 29. It was my pleasure to make the trip with our Miss NC America Emery Starr, where I got to

catch up with old friends like Jessica O’Brien, Monica Marlo, Natalie Smalls, Tiffany Bonet and Victoria Parker. Also on-hand were Tia Chanella, Neely O’Hara, Paisley Parque, Gabrielle Berlyn, Crystal Froste, Ebbony Addams, Brooke Divine LaReese, Shae Shae LaReese, Arabia Knight-Addams, Amaya, Olive Oyl, Miss NC Unlimited Cheetah Shaw and her king Taylor Knight-Addams and the list goes on and on. I did get to see bar owner Kent and met a precious new bartender they have there named Jose Antonio. Dy’Mond’s first RU was Charlotte’s own London Dior who wore a gown that would scratch the eyeballs out of your head, baby! Second RU was Orlando Chanel.

I have just unpacked my bags from a trip to Miami, FL to judge the Carolinas Continental pageants. Owner Alyson Thomas lives there now and timing wasn’t such that she could get away, so she had it there in her club this time.

No residency rules apply anyway, so that’s why it was held there and the title still stuck.

That easy. And, boy did Alyson ever treat us like royalty — from the accommodations to the VIP treatment at the bar on the Saturday night before. Imagine Macy Alexander’s face when she walked into Dash on Washington and met an idol face to face, Miss Khloe Kardashian! They chatted for a few minutes before Khloe had to run out. Needless to say, Macy is still on Cloud Nine. Macy’s good sister Leslie Lain is still glowing, I suppose, from all the trade she pulled while there. Bitter, party of one! As for the contest, there were

see Drag Rag on 15

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Drag Rag

City attorney to resign

continued from page 13

many entertainers, including all four national Continental titleholders, plus a few formers, like Chanel Dupree and Erika Norell. Also, some of Alyson’s former winners, too. The title winners that evening include Mr. Carolinas Continental Kyle Ean Haggerty, Miss PLUS Tianna Love, Miss Elite Cierra Douglas, Miss SC Continental Alexis Gabrielle Sherrington and NC Continental Athena Dion, a new child who did really well, including turning Talent completely out. This “little Greek kid” (as I call her), who was a military brat and actually lived in Ft. Bragg for two years, got a standing ovation. Next in line was another new child, Evelyn Monroe, who had on probably the prettiest updo I think I’ve ever seen. Many, many thanks to the co-hostess Vegas Dion for all the hospitality and to Alyson for treatment fit literally for a queen. Diskotekka in Miami is one happenin’ place! Wow!

continued from page 9 I’ll close with prelims leading up to NC EOY, which Angelica Dust will relinquish in just weeks. Miss Flower Power is Trixie Fontaine with RU Macaria Rage; Miss Forsyth County is Neely O’Hara with RU Malayia Chanel Iman; Miss Land in the Sky is Brinna Michaels with RU Manhattan; and Miss Piedmont Princess is Vivica Dupree with Paradise Dust as alternate.

I have the distinct pleasure of mentioning that Olive Oyl, the Grande Dame of the Triad, was named Miss Bat$h!# Emeritus. And, yes, they really are spelling it that way — you’ll see on the posters. Lord, only Olivia Vorhees Oyl would consent to such.

A final note — A.J., I am not going out in drag anytime soon, nor will I be asking for a booking of all things, so here is your one-time mention! Muah! : : info: Drop me a line, OK? TheTeaMissD@yahoo.com

gally defensible way to include sexual orientation in the City’s equal employment language without first requesting a Charter amendment from the legislature.”

The term “gender identity” was not added to Walton’s new non-discrimination policy.

“We are not recommending that you include ‘gender identity’ as a protected status,” McCarley’s memo to Walton read. “This is a relatively new term, has no recognized legal definition, and is highly subjective.”

Last year, McCarley told qnotes he worked with the city manager’s office to come up with the best possible changes for the new policy.

“The city manager asked us if we could find a way to do this and we gave him the best option we could,” he said in a telephone interview.

McCarley said the term “gender identity” had not been held up to any judicial scrutiny.

Harper Jean Tobin, policy counsel for the Washington, D.C.-based National Center for Transgender Equality (NCTE), told qnotes she believed city officials were mistaken.

“It’s not new in the sense that it has been part of various state and local laws in many places for a decade, in some places for two decades,” Tobin said in a 2010 interview via phone. “There is a pretty well established meaning.”

Charlotte is the last major city in the state to take up discussion of LGBT-inclusion in city ordinances or policies. Durham and Raleigh passed “sexual orientation”-inclusive non-discrimination policies in 1987 and 1988, respectively. Seven other cities and four counties include “sexual orientation” in their non-discrimination policies or ordinances. Boone, Carrboro, Chapel Hill and Orange County also include “gender identity.” : :

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tell trinity by trinity :: qnotes contributor

Before you have that one-night stand Hello Trinity, I love one-night stands. But, every time I say, “Wanna get together again?” they say, “Sorry, I’m in a relationship!” What’s up with open relationships?

Closed to the “Open,” Boston, MA Hello Closed, I agree, we single people have become laboratory rats for the partnered world. Like you, I too find many couples “play openly.” I also hear couples say, “It keeps us together rather than tears us apart.” which makes me want to scream “What-Ever!” So, sweetie, if you’re about to take part in a one-night stand, but want a few more nights, just ask, “Are you partnered, single or a lab technician?”

Hey Trinity, I read your tips for getting rid of telemarketers. But, really, I can’t just hang up on them like you suggested?

Telemarketing Troubles, Sioux Falls, SD Hey Troubles, If truth were told, I don’t always have the heart to hang up on those hard-working warriors of marketing. While I sometimes

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go numb or just want to jump out a window, you must always stay stern, clear and fast or, honey, come join me on the windowsill! (My cartoon gives you some real pointers on how I handle this challenging dilemma.)

Dearest Trinity, My boyfriend is great and I don’t want to hurt him, but how do I end my relationship without destroying someone I love?

Happy Endings, Stanford, CT Dearest Happy Endings, Saying “No more!” always hurts even the strongest of beasts.

So, finding the right time, place and/or right situation is your best solution. Never break up during a fight, the end of a long day or when someone is in crisis. Yes, he will be upset, but time heals everything. And, darling, don’t tell him while shopping in a rifle shop.

Dear Trinity, Someone I really liked dumped me because “I acted too ditzy and immature for a 34-year-old man.” Why do I have to act my age?

Keeping My Lollipop, Detroit, MI Dear Lollipop, Eventually you have to stop being a little brat and become a responsible, educated, charming man. Being a man means not always quitting relationships or jobs, not always saying what you feel and not always partying when the sun goes down. But, even better, pumpkin, here’s,

Trinity’s Tough Tips For Knowing When You’re a SAD (Still A Ditzy) boy 1. When you spend your last paycheck on Lady Gaga tickets instead of paying your rent, you’re SAD! 2. When the woman you love says, “Baby, lets do something fun tonight.” and you think, “God, I hate my mother!” you’re SAD! 3. When your hairline is receding and your belly is extending, but you still insist on wearing your 80s florescent club wear then you’re really SAD. 4. When your lover says, “You get dinner“ and you think “Happy Meal again, yippy!” you’re definitely SAD. 5. When Monday means, instead of a hot shower, a shave and off to work, you grab a Bloody Mary, two aspirins and begin another chat room adventure — SAD! 6. When Friday means, off to the 21-and-under bar for a key lime shot, instead of off with grown-up friends, then SAD. 7. When you dump your lover of 10 years for a 22-year-old twinkie who is “really cute and sweet and likes my Xbox!,” guess what?

8. When you still spend your free time hanging out in arcades and shopping malls, guess what again?

9. When you withdraw your last two grand and blow it on a RSVP vacation because your credit cards are all maxed out, you’re SAD. 10. Lastly, you know you’re still a ditzy boy if the previous nine tips pissed you off and now you’re going to get stoned just to show Trinity who’s in charge of your life, SAD for sure! : : — With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity was host of “Spiritually Speaking,” a weekly radio drama, and now performs globally. info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com Tell Trinity, P.O. Box 23861 . Ft. Lauderdale, FL 33307 Sponsored by: Provincetown Business Guild 800-637-8696 . www.ptown.org

out in the stars by charlene lichtenstein :: qnotes contributor

April 16 - 29 Take the bull by the horns when the Sun stampedes into Taurus.

It is time to lasso and brand your personal message on the world. Grab what you want by the tail and don’t let go. Hey, nice tail.

ARIES (03.21-04.20) Here are some things to keep in mind right now. First, be sure to surround yourself with luxurious objects of art to stimulate your imagination. Second, take a peek at your nest egg to see if it is ready to hatch. Third, cook up your best ideas and serve them while they are hot. Gay Rams launch themselves into outer space. Don’t scramble your message.

TAURUS (04.21-05-21) There is something about you, something astute, clever and very charming. But, queer Bulls may go out on a social limb in an attempt to weasel their way into a certain highly selective social circle. Life is much more that glibly chatting up the glitterati in order to get ahead. Don’t slip on your own oil as you grease the wheels … along with other parts. Get some heft behind you.

GEMINI (05.22-06.21) What is it about this time period that makes pink Twins so wildly intuitive?

Buff up your crystal ball and take a close peek.

You conjure up all sorts of radical scenarios and strange ideas. Saner folks think that you are either a savant or a loon. They say that there is a fine line between genius and madness. Have you crossed it? I guess we will have to see.

CANCER (06.22-07.23) If you find that your social calendar fills to overflowing, jump in with both feet. Friends rely on you to provide the who, what, when and where. But how, gay Crab? The secret is to maintain (and update) your list of contacts and do your research. Start with the A list and work your way down. Hmmm, how low on the alphabet will you need to go to get the right buzz?

LEO (07.24-08.23) It is time to strategize, proud Lion, and manifest your corporate destiny. Keep your ear to the ground and pay close attention to possible new opportunities. Have you been toiling in the background for substandard compensation and little recognition? Your time is coming soon. The real question is — will your head fit into your new spacious office?

VIRGO (08.24-09.23) Drop your antiseptic view of the world and get down and dirty, queer Virgo.

This spance of time goads you into getting to the guts of things to find out what gives you your unique spark. You may be surprised at what makes you tick. If the past few weeks have darkened your luminous light, use this time to find a slice of sunny oomph. Heck, why not eat the whole pie!

LIBRA (09.24-10.23) There is a tendency to play the victim when things do not go your way.

Stop nursing those regrets and use this time to bulldoze your way though the negative blockade.

Folks don’t like what you like? Tough. Consider the source when others start to criticize or stall you.

Only you can control how you feel about yourself and what you can personally accomplish.

SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) As things heat up, proud Scorps cannot help but consider their options in relationships. Create a list of what is working and what isn’t with partners. Ties that bind tighten and single scorpions are itching to get hitchin’. But, choose carefully, lover; the upcoming sultry months deserve a hot and buttered companion, not a hot and bothered one.

SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) Feeling especially slothful and decadent? (So, what else is new?)

That relaxing feeling will soon pass, gay Archer, as a fire is set under you. Well, maybe not a fire,

but certainly a fair amount of guilt. Perhaps it is time to think about getting into better shape.

Implement a new exercise regime and diet before your spandex stretches to cellophane.

CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) Grab a fistful of party mix and chug-a-lug. You become quite the party animal. Pink Caps have a way of finding the hottest spot in town and can turn up the temperature even more. Before you singe your best assets on a quick flame, check to see if there are longer lasting opportunities for romance. At least, find one that will burn through the summer.

AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) This time period stirs up your domestic agenda. Survey your domain and see if it needs some sprucing up. Aqueerians would like to plan some home-based entertaining, but how can you even consider it with your current abode? The experts are unavailable, but don’t let that stop you. What should stop you are those paint swatches in shades of puce and the macrame plant hangers.

PISCES (02.20-03.20) Your conversation is less than riveting, but who really cares? This is the time to set foundations and solidify your position rather than shake the rafters. Collect your thoughts and see how practical you can be.

There are some surprising results on the horizon no matter what the naysayers say. March to your own tune. Even better — tango to it. : : © 2011 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment. info: Visit www.TheStarryEye.com for e-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry. My book “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is available at bookstores and major booksites.

April 16-29 . 2011

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on being a gay parent by brett webb-mitchell :: qnotes contributor

Yoga daddy “And stretch one more time, finding your edge and pushing a little bit more, even if it is just an inch or a micro-inch,” Elijah says to his enthusiastic crowd of 25 aging yoga participants at our local YMCA. Downward dog, looking like my Labrador retrievers as they wander into our bedroom with their morning yawn and stretch, I put my head down, push back on my heels, hips up toward the sky, legs and hands outstretched.

Then we glide into upward dog, reversing the arc of the back. Amid squats, bends, warrior poses, leg and groin stretches, cross-legged and breathing exercises, we make our way through poses that cannot help but add flexibility to our not-so-limber bodies, minds and spirits. What is most mystifying and satisfying is that yoga has also made me more flexible as a father.

I came to yoga through my daughter Adrianne’s invitation one summer’s day. She took up yoga at college and soon my partner, and then I, followed her to a yoga class. At first, it was a daddy-daughter thing in which I was enjoying the camaraderie of the moment. Though my body ached as I learned how inflexible my limbs were, I looked at the clock, trying to figure out, “How much longer must I do this?”

But, with time, persistence and willingness to learn to take it slowly, my body became more lithesome. Along with my daughter, my son works out with me at the YMCA. He and I tend to focus on running and lifting weights. Needless to say, between both children, my entire being is getting a daily work-out, keeping me young(er), limber(er) and healthier. In a fun way, we are engaged in a practice that my father started with me when I was a young child, taking me to Saturday morning gym activities like Dodgeball or to little league practice. There is something special about physical activities that draw children and parents together in incredible ways.

What I’ve appreciated about learning yoga is how easily the practices have generalized to parenting as a gay dad. For example, consider flexibility. In yoga, arms, legs and torso, down to legs and

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fingers, can start to stiffen when not fully used. This is why it is helpful to bend and flex body parts slowly, methodically, not too quickly, but without undue waiting, massaging our bones and sinews back to fuller usage. Likewise, in life as a parent who is LGBTQ, because we parent in a world largely defined by straight parents, we need to flex or use the specialness of our love of being a parent whose family may face oppression overtly or covertly. We will be challenged to love our partners and children genuinely and smartly, careful so as not to humiliate anyone, but proclaiming the love without apology.

As we learn to be flexible in yoga, we also learn to stretch. What I love is the challenge to stretch a toe, finger, arm, legs and the curve of a back, a headstand or torso just a little further each and every time we engage in a yoga practice. Sometimes the stretch can be counted in inches and some times in micro-inches, only known by the practitioner.

It is learning the balance of being comfortable in our bodies, but also knowing where our “edge” is and challenging ourselves to pull or push a little bit more. In parenting, we are stretched. Growing up with a narrative of being a straight parent, I’m constantly adjusting and re-adjusting my expectations and strategies in parenting around the reality that I’m a gay dad. That means I have to be sensitive to and aware of how my being out, published, speaking to groups, affects not only me, but my children and partner as well. It is a privilege, honor and responsibility that straight parents do not have to consider.

Finally, Elijah has often reminded his class that yoga is 10 percent book knowledge or theory and 90 percent practice. So, is parenting: it is 10 percent book knowledge, whether reading this article or my book on this subject or that of other fine resources and 90 percent practice.

Gay parenting is not rocket science: it is more complicated and beautiful than that. It is an honor, duty, joy and takes more love than we thought we had within us (but, discover we do), in a world in which relationships change and in which control over our circumstances are tenuous at best. But, it is in the stretching and flexibility, that we learn to love just a little bit more, come what may. And, this is where I delight in being a yoga daddy. : :

Creech to share new book April 27 • Chapel Hill ‘Adam’s Gift’ Internationalist Books hosts the Rev. Jimmy Creech discussing his new book “Adam’s Gift: A Memoir of a Pastor’s Calling to Defy the Church’s Persecution of Lesbians and Gays,” a moving story and an important chapter in the unfinished struggle for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender civil and human rights. 405 W. Franklin St. Free. 919942-1740. internationalistbooks.org.

April 16-17 • Charlotte Queen City Stomp Hundreds of participants from across the country and southeast flock to Charlotte for Southern Country Charlotte’s annual Queen City Stomp, an LGBT Country-Western dancing festival including evening parties and dances and daytime dancing lessons and more. For more information, including registration, event details and lodging options, visit queencitystomp.com.

April 16-17 • Charlotte Kings Drive Art Walk Charlotte’s Festival in the Park presents its first annual Kings Drive Art Walk, a fine arts and emerging artists festival. Sugar Creek Greenway, Kings Dr. & Morehead St. April 16, 11 a.m.-6 p.m. April 17, 11 a.m.-5 p.m. festivalinthepark.org.

April 16 • Charlotte Petra’s Got Talent Petra’s continues their search for huge talent with eight new contestants. Calling all performers: vocalists, instrumentalists, dancers, comedians, drag performers, stupid dog tricks and more! Cash prizes for the top three and bookings for first place. Visit petraspianobar. com for official contestant rules. Audience will decide the winner. Petra’s Piano Bar, 1919 Commonwealth Ave. 10 p.m. petraspianobar.com.

April 17 • Durham ‘Sing for the Cure’ Kick-Off Social Common Woman Chorus and Triangle Gay Men’s Chorus co-host a casual event to promote the upcoming Triangle premiere performance of “Sing for the Cure” on June 12 at the Meymandi Concert Hall. Proceeds benefit the choruses and Susan G. Komen for the Cure-NC Triangle. Cash bar, free appetizers. Suggested

donation of $20. Revolution Restaurant, 107 W. Main St. 3-6 p.m. tgmchorus.org/events.

April 20 • Rock Hill Wednesday Night Out Amici’s Italian Restaurant in Rock Hill hosts a weekly night out for the surrounding LGBT community. WNO is a gay professionals happy hour for the Rock Hill/South Charlotte area — a perfect opportunity to meet make new friends and get connected. 2732 Celanese Rd. For more information, call 803-328-6836.

April 23 • Charlotte Plaza Midwood Spring Party Music from more than half a dozen bands and musicians. Artwork from community artists.

Food from the Diamond. This and more at the Plaza Midwood Spring Party, hosted by Petra’s. 1919 Commonwealth Ave. petraspianobar.com.

April 28 • Charlotte Pecha Kucha Local artists and creative souls gather for a unique show-and-tell presenting 20 slides for 20 seconds each in what organizers call an “exhilarating kaleidoscope of inspirations, ideas and work.” Amos’ Southend. 1423 S. Tryon St. 7:30 p.m. pecha-kucha.org/night/charlotte/.

May 3 • Charlotte Walk against domestic violence The Avon Foundation presents Walk the Course Against Domestic Violence. Walk up to 18 holes (five miles) alongside tournament players’ wives and families at Quail Hollow Club, a PGA TOUR course, to raise funds and awareness for the domestic violence cause.

All proceeds benefit local domestic violence organizations. $35 per person ($25 before 4/22), under 12 free. Quail Hollow Club, 3700 Gleneagles Rd. 6-9 p.m. 866-646-2866.

we want your who/what/where

BUILD

walkthecourseagainstdv.org.

May 5 • Charlotte Antiques show From apartments to million dollar homes, you’ll find unique items to fit any style and budget at the International Collectibles and Antiques Show! Including: home decor, antiques, furniture, collectibles, art, jewelry, crafts and more.

Metrolina Tradeshow Expo, 7100 Statesville Rd. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. icashows.com/ICAShows.

May 6 • Charlotte Empower(mint) The Mint Museum in Charlotte is hosting three “First Friday” Mint events this summer, the second of which is Empower(mint). The Mint Museum Uptown will be organizing live entertainment, gallery tours, hands-on art activities and a cash bar. The event is free for members or $10 for non-members. The Levine Center for the Arts, 500 S. Tryon St. 6-11 p.m. For more information contact April Young at april.young@ mintmuseum.org or call 704-337-2034.

May 6 • Charlotte HIV, AIDS, and You Art Show Local artists present their “Positively Art” show, remaining on display until June 17.

The Lesbian and Gay Community Center, 820 Hamilton St., Suite B11. Show opens at 5:30 p.m. Free. 704-333-0144. gaycharlotte.com.

May 7 • Charlotte AIDS Walk Charlotte One of the largest AIDS fundraisers across the Carolinas, AIDS Walk Charlotte raises funds for the Regional AIDS Interfaith Network. To register walk teams or learn more, visit aidswalkcharlotte.org.

May 14 • Charlotte Queen City Drag Race

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arts. entertainment. news. views.

The second annual Queen City Drag Race heats up! Competitions, music, drink and food! Proceeds benefit Human Rights Campaign and Pride Charlotte.

Hartigan’s Irish Pub, 601 S. Cedar St. 1-6 p.m. queencitydragrace.com.

May 14 • Raleigh OutRaleigh The LGBT Center of Raleigh presents its downtown festival celebrating diversity — an historic first for the capital city. Festival will include vendors, children’s area, entertainment and more. City Plaza, Martin St. For more information, including festival schedule and a location map, visit outraleigh.com.

May 21 • Raleigh AIDS Walk+Ride Alliance of AIDS Services-Carolina hosts their annual walk and bicycle ride in downtown Raleigh. Register walkers, learn more about the ride and more at aidswalkandride.org.

May 25 • Charlotte Fourth Annual Happening The Charlotte Lesbian & Gay Fund presents their annual luncheon event, presented by Wells Fargo. Proceeds benefit the Fund.

2011 grant recipients will be highlighted.

Omni Hotel, 132 E. Trade St. fftc.org/Page. aspx?pid=953.

May 27-30 • Charlotte Twirlicious 2011 A Memorial Day Weekend full of exciting events by Just Twirl. Details TBA. justtwirl.com.

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