QNotes Aug. Sept. 15-28, 2012 by QnotesCarolinas

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

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Sept. 15-28 . 2012

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Sept. 15-28, 2012 Vol 27 No 10

arts. entertainment. news. views.

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contributors this issue

Paige Braddock, Rosendo Brown, Bil Browning, Matt Comer, Chris Fitzsimon, Kevin Grooms/Miss Della, Jon Hoppel, James, Nichols, Charlene Lichtenstein, Lainey Millen, David Stout, Dan Stroupe, Trinity

front page Graphic Design by Lainey Millen Photo Credit: Brandon Shauf

news & features 6 8 10 12 13

News Notes: Regional Briefs Where were the protesters? DNC retrospective DNC historic call for inclusion Schumer wants ENDA passed

a&e / life&style 14 Fall fashion focus 16 Playing the field 19 On the map 20 Tell Trinity 21 Out in the Stars 22 20 Questions 23 NC Pride preview 24 Drag Rag special report 26 InFocus: Faith groups 26 Fabulance 26 Jane’s World 27 Q events calendar

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13 opinions & views 4 4 4 5

Guest Commentary On the record: DNC QPoll Editor’s Note

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Sept. 15-28 . 2012

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guest commentary

DNC: On the Record

by Chris Fitzsimon :: NC Policy Watch

Democratic Party leaders on LGBT equality

The record breaking special interest election

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Not too many years ago, Republicans in North Carolina railed against what they described as the “pay-to-play” culture in Raleigh where special interests who gave political leaders big bundles of campaign contributions were rewarded with privileged access and preferential treatment. That was when the Republicans were in the minority in the General Assembly and having trouble raising as much money as their Democratic opponents. A new report from Democracy North Carolina finds that not only have the fundraising tables turned, but Republicans seem to be embracing the pay-to-play culture even more than the Democrats they constantly criticized. The report finds that Republican legislative leaders are not only raising more money from special interest political action committees than their predecessors, they are also raising a higher percentage of their campaign cash from the PACs than Democrats did. In fact, they are raising more of their money from special interests than disgraced former Democratic House Speaker Jim Black did in his heyday on Jones St. — and that’s not an easy bar to clear. The General Assembly passed new ethics and fundraising rules as a result of the scandals that ultimately sent Black to federal prison. One of the new laws was a ban on lobbyists making contributions to legislators’ campaigns. It’s hard to believe that was ever legal in the first place, that the same people who were asking legislators for votes could also put checks in their hands — but, it was until just a few years ago. The Democracy NC report finds that the law hasn’t stopped the indirect exchange of money for votes, it just required a rewording of the appeals. The report cites a recent solicitation from the political staff of House Speaker Thom Tillis sent to lobbyists telling them to get their PACs to send a check before an upcoming deadline or at least explain when the money will be sent. Bob Hall with Democracy NC calls the appeal a “shakedown, plain and ugly,” and notes that the fundraising figures show it appears to be working. If that’s not enough evidence that we have the best government special interests can

buy, consider another report issued this week, this one from the Center for Public Integrity. It finds that out-of-state corporate money is playing a major role in the governor’s race in North Carolina. The report details how corporations from across the country give hundreds of thousands of dollars to groups like the Republican Governors Association and the Democratic Governors Association who then run attack ads against candidates in North Carolina. That leads to the troubling scenario where groups like the Metropolitan Milwaukee Association of Commerce is basically funding attack ads against Democratic gubernatorial candidate Walter Dalton. A spokesperson for the insurance company AFLAC, a big donor to the Republican Governors Association, was unaware that the group’s donation was also being used to attack Dalton on television. Maybe even more disturbing still are the large anonymous contributions given to another category of political groups who are not required to disclose who is paying for the ads they run against candidates in North Carolina and elsewhere. That makes a mockery of the Right’s long opposition to meaningful campaign finance reforms like public financing that would provide funding for candidates without the special interest strings attached. Their argument used to be that all we needed for a vibrant democracy was full and immediate disclosure of who was funding campaigns. Now, they seem perfectly comfortable, not only that our elections and our government are for sale to the highest bidders, but that we often can’t even find out who the bidders are — at least until after the election when the legislative bodies meet and starting providing a return on the special interests’ investments. Record special interest money in pay to play Raleigh, unlimited contributions from Milwaukee helping determine who will be governor in North Carolina and anonymous corporate money deciding who will represent us in Raleigh and Washington. There’s a lot of ways to describe that system, but democracy is not one of them. : : — Chris Fitzsimon is the executive director at NC Policy Watch

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qnotes

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

“We don’t think government can solve all our problems. But we don’t think that government is the source of all our problems — any more than are welfare recipients, or corporations, or unions, or immigrants, or gays, or any other group we’re told to blame for our troubles.” — President Barack Obama, Sept. 6 “You’re the reason a young immigrant who grew up here and went to school here and pledged allegiance to our flag will no longer be deported from the only country she’s ever called home; why selfless soldiers won’t be kicked out of the military because of who they are or who they love; why thousands of families have finally been able to say to the loved ones who served us so bravely: ‘Welcome home.’” — President Barack Obama, Sept. 6 “This has been the most diverse, most inclusive convention ever held — a convention not just of symbolism, but of substance. For the first time, a major party platform recognizes marriage equality as a basic human right!” — Democratic National Convention Chair and Los Angeles Mayor Antonio R. Villaraigosa, Sept. 6 “In too many states, even some folks who have a job wake up every morning in fear that they will lose that job simply for being gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. We fight for them.” — Openly gay California Assembly Speaker John A. Pérez, Sept. 5 “Diversity is America’s strength, and only by working together, as one nation, can we form a more perfect union. That is why President Obama brought to Washington a vision for one America — an America in which we can overcome divisions of red and blue to make our country greater. It is why he’s fighting to make citizenship a reality for young immigrants who go to college or serve in our military. It is why he repealed ‘don’t ask, don’t tell,’ so that no person is prevented from serving the country they love because of whom they love. And it is why Barack Obama became the first sitting president in American history to show his personal support for same-sex marriage.” — Openly gay Colorado Congressman Jared Polis, Sept. 4 “If farmers and blacksmiths could win independence from an empire; if immigrants could leave behind everything they knew for a better life on our shores; if women could be dragged to jail for seeking the vote; if a generation could defeat a depression, and define greatness for all time; if a young preacher could lift us to the mountaintop with his righteous dream; and if proud Americans can be who they are and boldly stand at the altar with who they love; then surely, surely we can give everyone in this country a fair chance at that great American Dream.” — First Lady Michelle Obama, Sept. 4

qpoll

Were you impressed with Charlotte’s hosting of the DNC? Did everything go over smoothly? Did Charlotte really shine? See the options and vote: goqnotes.com/to/qpoll

views

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editor’s note by Matt Comer matt@goqnotes.com

With DNC over, Charlotte must live up to progressive hype Charlotte’s moment to shine in the national and international spotlight went off with nary a hitch earlier this month, as thousands of outof-town visitors poured in to attend the 2012 Democratic National Convention. Whether as official delegates or other guests, journalists, police or other support staff, all our DNC visitors heard much of the same story over and over: Charlotte is a diverse, progressive and dynamic “New South” city. Most visitors, according to local media and my own interactions with guests, would have agreed with city leaders’ and boosters’ claims. Charlotte is a phenomenal town with progressive ideals and an accepting culture. Great food, great nightlife, a walkable Uptown and friendly residents willing to answer guests’ every beck and call. It’s true we have a great city, but what our leaders failed to tell the public is that so much of the city’s accepted storyline was nothing more than smoothly-crafted PR messaging. Socially and economically, Charlotte is diverse and it is accepting. LGBT locals experience little discrimination in restaurants, bars or other public spaces. Politically, the LGBT community has made more progress here in the past three years under Anthony Foxx than in all the preceding 22 years we were led by Republican mayors. But, truth is always more complex than any press release can ever fully explain. Though all of the positive traits attributed to our city are true , the LGBT community remains left with hardly any tangible political success to speak of. Our mayor and other city leaders have spoken at our events and written us welcome letters. We have new personnel policies protecting LGB (though not transgender) city workers. Partners of LGBT city employees will soon be able to access domestic partner benefits. Yet, these small steps toward progress cannot be the full extent of what is possible here. In order to live up to its own self-made hype, Charlotte must do several things to ensure continued legal and social acceptance for LGBT people. These steps are simple and taken by cities comparable to ours the nation over, some of which were taken by the three DNC host city finalists we beat out, but who left us dead last when it came to official LGBT protections. So, as we move forward, let’s cast the boosterism aside and take real action to make equality real. Among the necessary improvements: •C harlotte City Council must bring to a public meeting and vote upon a fully-inclusive city ordinance codifying its personnel policy on non-discrimination and include both sexual orientation and gender identity. •C harlotte City Council must bring to a public meeting and vote upon amendments to the Commercial Non-Discrimination Ordinance prohibiting businesses contracting with the city from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity.

• The city must work with officials at the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Police Department to finally institute a special liaison to, with and for the LGBT community, as has been done in several cities across the U.S. and in the South, including Atlanta. • The Mecklenburg Board of County Commissioners must bring to a public meeting and vote upon amendments to its non-discrimination policy in order to protect transgender workers. • The mayor, city council and county commission must work together to establish a joint city-county task force or advisory board for LGBT citizens, business owners and youth, thereby ensuring continued inclusion and holding city and county government accountable to their self-instituted commitments to inclusion and diversity. • As the LGBT community has grown here and shown itself to be a vital component of the city’s economic and cultural engine, Charlotte City Council and the Mecklenburg Board of County Commissioners should find ways to support local LGBT non-profits through grants, sponsorships or other projects or programs. If cities like Columbia, S.C., can financially support their local LGBT community center by sponsoring their annual Pride festivities, I see no reason why the region’s largest city cannot also do the same and more. There are many other projects, programs and improvements local government and local organizations can take to more fully include LGBT people into the life of the city. Getting the above accomplished completely and soon will put us on track to truly becoming the progressive New South city our leaders have spent years telling the nation we are — messaging that only became louder and louder as the DNC neared and finally came to town. If Charlotte truly desires to be what it claims it already is, then local leaders must be willing to take risks and do what it is right. Gone are the days when local LGBT people fawn over a mayor’s short appearance at a luncheon or gush over a boiler plate welcome letter in which the words “gay” or “lesbian” are simply dropped in by an intern, clerk or secretary. Now is the time for real action by our local leaders — action that requires real courage, true leadership and an honest desire to fully represent all of Charlotte’s constituents. That kind of action requires voting and a public commitment, rather than backroom policy deals, to create real change. President Barack Obama and the Democratic Party have shown true and courageous leadership in their outspoken support of marriage equality and other LGBT equality measures. It is an example Charlotte should follow now and without delay. : :

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

qnotes

news notes: carolinas. nation. world. compiled by Lainey Millen | David Stout | Matt Comer

Charlotte Pagans hold Pride event

DALLAS — Piedmont Pagan Pride Day will be held on Sept. 22, 10 a.m.-7 p.m. in Biggerstaff Park, 144 Leisure Ln. This event is held to celebrate the Autumnal Equinox and part of the worldwide International Pagan Pride Project, a non-profit organization dedicated to the elimination of prejudice and religious discrimination through education, activism, charity and community. They are held during the two-week period surrounding the Equinox. Holli Emore, executive director of Cherry Hill Pagan seminary, will be the keynote speaker. Enjoy martial arts demonstrations, belly dancing and hammered dulcimer. Additionally, classes will help to educate attendees. And, children may visit the Kid’s Booth filled with storytelling and crafts. Rituals to celebrate the fall harvest will take place as well. Contributions will be accepted to benefit Second Harvest Food Bank of Metrolina. Pagan Pride is free to the public, but organizers ask that non-perishable items be brought to further their designated charity. For more information, visit piedmontpaganpride.com. In Raleigh, the Central North Carolina Pagan Pride Days, Pagan Pride Raleigh, will be held on Sept. 15 and 16 at the N.C. State Fairgrounds, Gate 5, 974 Youth Center Dr. Gates open at 10:45 a.m. To learn more, visit cncppd.org or cncpaganpride.org. — L.M.

PFLAG presents scholarships

SALISBURY — Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG), Salisbury/Rowan chapter, is holding its annual Autumn Soirée on Sept. 15, 6-10 p.m., at Looking Glass Artist Collective, 405 N. Lee St. According to the Salisbury Post, this event is the chapter’s fifth annual fundraiser designed to support it’s scholarship foundation sponsored by Food Lion and other businesses and individuals. So far, they have been able to gift 19 $1,000 scholarships to LGBT and straight ally students from the county to further their postsecondary education. There are four awards, all named for supporters to the effort: Anne Standback-Charlotte Kinlock Scholarship; Founder’s Equality Scholarship (named to honor chapter founder Michael Clawson); Linda Ketner Scholarship; and Bob Page-Dale Frederiksen Scholarship, founder and CEO of Replacements, Ltd. Keynote speaker is LaWana Mayfield from Charlotte’s City Council. A silent auction and raffle fundraiser will accompany food and beverages. Willow Catherine will entertain. Tickets are $20, $10 students and may be purchased at Critter’s Cards and Gifts, 125 S. Main St., or Greyshores Trading Company, 119 S. Main St., in Salisbury and Green Goat

qnotes

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

Gallery, 516 South Salisbury Ave., in Spencer. For more information, visit salisbury-pflag.org. — L.M.

Triangle Condoms take tour

DURHAM — Triangle Empowerment Center, Inc., and Community Partners will present their Condom Nation Tour on Sept. 21, 12-5:30 p.m., at Urban Ministries of Durham, 410 Liberty St. This event will be filled with a host of freebies and is open to the public: condom distribution, HIV/AIDs testing and information. Free gift cards and food will be given to those who decide to get tested onsite. Community sponsors, partners and collaborators include: Triangle Empowerment, Lincoln Community Health Center, Alliance of AIDS Services-Carollina, University of North Carolina Center for AIDS Research, Urban Ministries, New Tactics & Strategies, Partnership for a Healthy Durham and AIDS Clinical Trials Unit at the University of North Carolina. For more information, call 919-432-8902.

Interfaith forum slated

RALEIGH — The Human Rights Campaign’s Interfaith Forum for Love and Equality will be held on Oct. 14 beginning at 5 p.m. with refreshments at Pullen Memorial Baptist Church, 1801 Hillsborough St., which will serve as host. It is open to the public. Sponsors include the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) of North Carolina, along with Sun Trust, Equality NC and the LGBT Center of Raleigh. Comprised of two parts, the first one will feature a public forum from 5:20-6:15 p.m. Invited clergy from various religious traditions will serve as speakers. At press time, they are Rev. Brandon Boone or Rev. Wanda Floyd, St. John’s MCC; Rabbi Eric Solomon, Beth Meyer Synagogue; Jack Ori, author and transgender advocate; and Maddy Goss, HRC Board of Governors. Additionally, outdoor activities complete the day with songs, prayers and a brief candlelight vigil from 6:15-6:45 p.m. Participants can order candles for $3 for one, $5 for three and $2 each additional by visiting hrc.org/ events/entry/raleigh-interfaith-forum. Forms and payment is due by Oct. 5. The key objective of the forum is to allow the religious community to “express its love and support for the LGBT community, regardless of gender identity and sexual orientation.” For more information or to read the statement of support by participating clergy, visit facebook.com/HRC.Interfaith.Forum. — L.M.

Seniors get LGBT group

DURHAM — The Durham Center for Senior Life, 406 Rigsbee Ave., Suite 202, has initiated an LGBT group for seniors who are 55 and older. The center started offering LGBT seniors this alternative monthly gathering in July 2012. Participants gather to swap stories, meet new

friends, talk politics, movies and more. They have even set up an information table at the North Carolina Gay and Lesbian Film Festival to share their inclusive group. Although in its infancy, they hope to expand its scope over time. They are currently meeting twice monthly. Allison Hubbard, director of programs, said that they are open to suggestions in order to move forward. They are especially sensitive to the needs of those in the transgender community, saying that a transgender individual approached Hubbard expressing that he was concerned about how much discrimination would unfold if “his buddies” at the center knew his history. This offers him a viable alternative. The center is currently obtaining buy-in from its administrators and advisory committee and it is partnering with a Duke University member to help create a safe space. “We want to be inclusive of all seniors and feel that we need to reach out to LGBTs,” she added. A meeting is planned for Sept. 25, 2-3 p.m., at Blue Coffee Café, 202 N. Corcoran St. Refreshments will be available for purchase. For more information, visit dcsinc.org. — L.M.

Western Ball caps off donation season

HICKORY — AIDS Leadership Foothillsarea Alliance (ALFA) will be hosting its Dining for Friends Finale Silver Masquerade Ball on Oct. 6, 8 p.m., at Mosteller Mansion, 1998 Mosteller Estate Ave, S.E. This event is the culmination of three months of community fundraising to benefit ALFA. It features gourmet food, cocktails, dancing, entertainment, live music, raffles and more. Cost is $35 in advance, $40 at the door. Community members are encouraged to hold Dining with Friends dinner, cocktail parties, lunch or brunch with their friends prior to the finale. Guests simply make a contribution to attend and the proceeds go to support ALFA’s work. Parties should be held on or before Sept. 30. Church and civic organizations are also able to hold larger events as well. There is even a Dining for Friend’s Dining Out for Friends restaurant night on Sept. 26. Host and sponsor packets are available online. Organizers said they need to raise $68,000 in order to continue supporting the nine-county service area. For tickets or more information, call Kevin Gwynn at 828-322-1447, ext. 224, or email alfadirect@alfainfo.org or Martha Ganett at 828-322-1447, ext. 222, or email alfaoffmgr@ alfainfo.org or visit alfainfo.org. — L.M.

National/Global PBS to end LGBT series

NEW YORK, N.Y. — After 20 years on the Public Broadcasting Network, the “In the Life” series chronicling LGBT stories in the fight for equality, will end with its December 2012 segment. This Emmy Award-nominated has been a signature series and shattered stereotypes and helped pave the way for today’s LGBT movement. In the Life Media said, “Much has changed since our programming first premiered. LGBT people now figure prominently in television news and media. Lesbian and gay soldiers serve openly and proudly in the mili-

tary. A majority of Americans, including our president, support marriage equality. Studies show that visibility is the driving force behind this rapid shift in cultural attitudes toward the LGBT community. As the media organization that pioneered LGBT visibility on television, we believe ITLM played a significant role in this historic progress. Today, we pause to celebrate ITLM’s remarkable legacy and announce a conclusion and a new direction.” Their organization is taking on a new direction and they will be working with others to create a video archive documenting the LGBT rights struggle. On Oct. 1, they will be honoring Gill Foundation activist Tim Gill, award-winning TV journalist and author Jane Velez-Mitchell and food executives Paris and Christopher Barclay at their annual awards gala at the New York Historical Society. The series has been featured on North Carolina affiliates over the years. For more information or to watch previous episodes, visit itlmedia.org. — L.M.

‘Talk’ campaign seeks end to suicide

WEST HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — Throughout September, The Trevor Project’s National Suicide Prevention Month, people from coast to coast are invited to join “Talk to Me,” the campaign for conversation. “Talk to Me” is rooted in research that indicates improving both help-seeking behaviors and access to care can have a dramatic effect on suicide prevention. By making it okay to offer help and being willing to connect a person with life-saving resources, everyone can help save a life with these three simple words. “It is vital that we recognize our own individual ability to help prevent the tragedy of suicide. At The Trevor Project, we are especially concerned about the risks facing young people who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and questioning, but ‘Talk to Me’ is for all of us: parents, friends, family members, coworkers, teachers and students. We all have the ability to let another person know that they are not alone and that we genuinely care about their health and well-being,” said Abbe Land (pictured), executive director and CEO of The Trevor Project. Raising awareness about suicide prevention in September highlights the urgency of addressing the preventable, third-leading cause of death among young people age 10 through 24. National Suicide Prevention Month includes recognition of National Suicide Prevention Week, (Sept. 9-15), World Suicide Prevention Day (Sept. 10) and The Trevor Project Day (Sept. 27). — D.S.

Global group brings fight to U.S.

SACRAMENTO, Calif. — On Aug. 28, the California Assembly passed SB 1172 which protects minors from damaging “ex-gay” therapies.

see next page u

news

goqnotes.com/to/news The bill, already approved by the Senate and, at press time, awaiting Gov. Jerry Brown’s signature, declares any efforts by a medical provider to change the sexual orientation of anyone under the age of 18 to be “unprofessional conduct” and grounds for loss of license. Because Brown has not yet made public his position on the bill, international LGBT rights group AllOut.org has been gathering signatures for a petition supporting the measure. “This isn’t just a problem in California or the United States,” said AllOut.org executive director Andre Banks. “American religious extremists are bringing these dangerous practices to more than 30 countries all over the world.” Banks added, “In the last six months alone, AllOut.org members have lead the charge to successfully push back against attempts to export ‘pray away the gay’ as a legitimate medical treatment in the U.K., France and Argentina.” — D.S.

Phone app aids Kinsey sex research

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Indiana University has released Kinsey Reporter, a global mobile app for collecting and reporting anonymous data about sexual and other intimate behaviors. The pilot project allows citizens around the world to use the free applications now available for Apple and Android mobile platforms to not only report on sexual behavior and experi-

ences, but also to share, explore and visualize the accumulated data. Users simply download the free app and begin contributing observed information on topics such as sexual activity, public displays of affection, flirting, unwanted experiences and birth control use. Even though no information identifying users submitting reports is collected or stored, the time and general location of the report is collected and input into the database. Users also have the option of selecting their own geographic preference for the report by choosing city/town, state/region or country. “People are natural observers. It’s part of being social, and using mobile apps is an excellent way to involve citizen scientists,” said Julia Heiman, director of The Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender and Reproduction. “We expect to get new insights into sexuality and relationships today. What do people notice, what are they involved in, and what can they relate to us about their lives and their communities?” — D.S.

stories from the LGBT community that build support for equality. Cruz’s involvement with GLAAD began in 1995, when he accepted the GLAAD Media Award on behalf of the groundbreaking drama, “My So-Called Life.” Cruz’s role as gay high school student Rickie Vasquez was a pioneering moment for inclusive television. “For more than two decades GLAAD has combatted anti-LGBT images in the media and changed the national conversation about LGBT people,” said Cruz. “Today, GLAAD is also using its media expertise to create a culture that is accepting and safe for all young people. From Spanish-language media to sports, Hollywood to the newsroom, GLAAD shares the stories and sparks the discussions that make the world a better place for LGBT people everywhere. I am proud and excited to grow this culture-changing work.” GLAAD President Herndon Graddick said, “Throughout his career, Wilson Cruz has been a strong advocate for LGBT Americans. His work in film and television, as well as his commitment to supporting local and national LGBT

organizations, exemplifies GLAAD’s mission to move LGBT equality forward.” — D.S.

Study: Gays don’t affect unit morale

JERUSALEM, Israel — According to a new study, the presence of openly gay soldiers has not affected unit morale in the Israel Defense Force (IDF). The study’s authors surveyed 417 male Israeli soldiers from 22 military installations. Statistical analysis of responses to the survey indicated that for both combat and noncombat units, the presence of gay members had no relationship to the cohesiveness of the unit. “As we reach the one-year anniversary of repeal of the United States military’s “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy, this new study responds to the central concern that an integrated military would harm cohesion,” said Aaron Belkin, director of the Los Angelesbased Palm Center, the sponsor of the report. Israel has allowed gays and lesbians to serve openly in the military since 1993. — D.S.

Open actor joins GLAAD staff

NEW YORK, N.Y. — Actor and LGBT advocate Wilson Cruz has join GLAAD’s staff as the Strategic Giving Officer. He will be part of the LGBT media watchdog group’s Development team, helping to fund GLAAD’s work amplifying

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

qnotes

dnc 2012 goqnotes.com/dnc

Where were the anti-LGBT protesters at Dem Convention? Anti-gay street preachers and other protesters mysteriously absent at 2012 DNC by Bil Browning :: Contributing Writer

[Ed. Note — This piece originally published at The Bilerico Project (bilerico.com), a news partner for Democratic National Convention Coverage.] CHARLOTTE — At any political convention one of the most interesting sidenotes are the protests. Whether activists are chanting about left or right wing causes, oftentimes the political theater can outweigh the grandstanding inside the hall. I was a protester at the 1992 Republican National Convention in Houston, Texas. I went on the spur of the minute and spent most of my time huddled with ACT UP organizers planning the massive protest march, making signs and generally having the time of my life. In 2008, I attended the Democratic National Convention in Denver as a member of the media. My partner was a member of one of the rules committees and we shared our hotel room with Indiana’s first transgender delegate. This year I was back in Charlotte for the Democratic convention as a member of the media again. It hit me as I was standing outside of the convention hall on the first day of the convention looking at all of the various protestors, vendors and security officers. For the first time, I hadn’t seen any stand-alone religious bigots standing outside and chanting about “perverts” and holding signs about sexual deviants and “the sin of homosexuality.” Instead, this year all of the religious right fervor seemed to have been saved primarily for the anti-abortion crowd. While the occasional anti-gay sign was mixed in their motley bag of moral outrage, they’ve saved their zest for man’s oldest enemy — an independent woman. Since LGBT rights have advanced dramatically under President Obama, I expected to see even more of the Fred Phelpsian sort in Charlotte, not less. Combined with the party’s historic endorsement of marriage equality, I assumed that the anti-gay nutjobs would be out in full frothing force.

Flip Benham, right, of the Concord-based operation Save America, protests outside Charlotte Convention Center during the DNC.

Pat Buchanan’s legacy Back in 1992, Pat Buchanan gave a notably bitter speech full of anti-gay and sexist venom meant to rouse evangelical voters from their slumber over President Bush’s somewhat moderate positions on social issues. Buchanan had challenged the incumbent Republican president for the nomination because the country was headed “in a liberal direction.” Buchanan’s ultra conservative campaign didn’t win him the nomination, but it did secure him a speaking spot at the convention. “When the Irish-Catholic Governor of Pennsylvania, Robert Casey, asked to say a few words on behalf of the 25 million unborn children destroyed since Roe v Wade, Bob Casey was told there was no room for him at the podium at Bill Clinton’s convention, and no room at the inn,” Buchanan thundered during his primetime speech. “Yet a militant leader of the homosexual rights movement could rise at that same convention and

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Sept. 15-28 . 2012

say: ‘Bill Clinton and Al Gore represent the most pro-lesbian and pro-gay ticket in history.’ And so they do. “Elect me, and you get ‘two for the price of one,’ Mr. Clinton says of his lawyer-spouse! My friends, this is radical feminism. The agenda that Clinton & Clinton would impose on America: abortion on demand, a litmus test for the Supreme Court, homosexual rights, discrimination against religious schools, women in combat units — that’s change, all right. But that’s not the kind of change America needs. It’s not the kind of change America wants. And it’s not the kind of change we can abide in a nation we still call ‘God’s country.’” Buchanan went on to continue a lucrative career as a political pundit; his star only went higher after his tirade on national television. In fact, for several years he was a frequent guest and co-host on liberal leaning MSNBC shows

— supposedly to provide “balance” from the right. The network finally let him go earlier this year after repeated racist and anti-semitic incidents. Buchanan’s legacy lives on as the Republican Party has continued their antiLGBT and anti-female tirade for the last 20 years. Republicans around the country have championed legislation to ban samesex marriage and restrict women’s right to choose whether or not to have an abortion. One step forward, one step back For a while, the violent attacks on women’s health care clinics and doctors had started to fade away slightly as hate crimes and anti-LGBT rhetoric ratcheted up. Bush II’s crusade to the presidency used the threat of same-sex marriage equality as a boogeyman to drive evangelical voters to the polls and states around the nation passed constitutional amendments to restrict the freedom to marry to opposite sex couples only. Ironically enough, one of Bush the Lesser’s top campaign masterminds, Ken Mehlman, has since come out of the closet and now vociferously defends the rights of gays and lesbian couples to marry — as has Bush’s extremely conservative former vice president, Dick Cheney. As LGBT rights have become more mainstream and acceptable in the public eye, a woman’s right to make her own medical decisions has once again become a hot button issue. Virginia Republicans led the pack by attempting to force women seeking an abortion to undergo a medically unnecessary transvaginal ultrasound probe this year. Republican Congress members howled to defund Planned Parenthood. State lawmakers across the nation have tried to edge the law closer to outlawing abortion by declaring fetuses “persons.” One could see how the narrative has started to switch back to the war on women by walking the streets of downtown Charlotte. Flip Benham is a regular protester of Pride events and gay-friendly Charlotte churches. He was convicted of stalking an abortion doctor in 2011, but is currently getting a new trial. With his history of demonizing LGBT people, I noticed that all of his signs are about abortion instead. Obviously, there were protesters who shouted anti-gay slurs and Biblical verses. As far as I could see though, the hateful rhetoric and outrageous placards were all placed alongside anti-abortion propaganda. We were almost the afterthought in this year’s religious right rebellion. It’ll be interesting over the next few years to see how this plays out. As the Democrats have supported LGBT rights by larger and larger amounts, it remains just as necessary for our community to continue to support our sisters in the struggle for human rights. We can do no less for the lesbians, bisexual women and transgender women inside our own community, but as we expect straight people to defend our humanity, we must champion the fight for womenís rights too. : :

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

qnotes

dnc 2012 goqnotes.com/dnc

Seen at the DNC

Charlotte locals, other North Carolinians reppin’ the Queen City and Tar Heel State

North Carolina’s only openly gay state lawmaker, Rep. Marcus Brandon of Guilford County, stands with openly lesbian state Senate candidate Deb Butler as they help to open the convention’s first LGBT caucus on Tuesday. Photo Credit: David Lari

Charlotte in 2012 Host Committee CEO Dan Murray with his daughter and wife on the floor of the convention. Photo Credit: Matt Comer

North Carolina’s first and only openly transgender delegate, Janice Covington, is interviewed outside Time Warner Cable Arena. Photo Credit: Matt Comer

qnotes

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

Chapel Hill Mayor Mark Kleinschmidt chats with other DNC delegates and guests before the Thursday LGBT caucus meeting. Photo Credit: David Lari

President of the Young Democrats of North Carolina, Sam Spencer, center, listens intently to convention procedings as North Carolina Congressman Mel Watt of Charlotte turns to chat with a constituent. Photo Credit: Matt Comer

First Lady Michelle Obama greets attendees at a Human Rights Campaign and Gay & Lesbian Victory Fund luncheon on Wednesday.

President Barack Obama delivers his nomination acceptance speech.

Photo Credit: David Lari

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

qnotes

Historic DNC a continued call for full inclusion Commentary: With progress made, more work remains to ensure full inclusion of transgender community by James Nichols :: Contributing Writer

A rainbow flag hanging on a railing inside Time Warner Cable Arena stands out among the sea of red, white and blue. Photo Credit: David Lari/QNotes.

The 2012 Democratic National Convention proved to be a monumentally historic event for the LGBT community and the Democratic Party itself. The party platform, approved on Sept. 4, includes a marriage equality plank that reaffirms President Barack Obama’s commitment to legalize same-sex marriage and combat employment discrimination against LGBT individuals. This comes almost a year after the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” and several months after Obama became the first president to publicly state that he is in support of same-sex marriage. The inclusion of LGBT delegates from each state in the convention, including individuals identifying as transgender, proved to be one of the most thrilling and crucial components of the week. Following the 2008 convention, organizers passed new affirmative action rules for delegate selection in order to foster a diverse and accurate reflection of the American population. The new rules resulted in the largest LGBT delegation any convention has ever seen. North Carolina sent its first transgender delegate in history, Janice Covington, to represent the state at this year’s convention. A victory of this magnitude cannot be overstated, particularly after North Carolinians voted to approve Amendment One in May. This legislation prohibited same-sex couples from receiving full marriage rights, restricting marriage between a man and a woman as the only legal union recognized in the state. In all, 13 transgender individuals served as delegates for their respective states at this convention.

see Inclusion on 13

qnotes

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

dnc 2012 goqnotes.com/dnc

Chuck Schumer at DNC: We will pass ENDA

New York senator says employment non-discrimination is ‘high priority’ by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

Photo Credit: Matt Comer

New York Sen. Chuck Schumer said passage of the Employment NonDiscrimination Act was a “high priority” during an impromptu question and answer session with independent media and bloggers attending the 2012 Democratic National Convention in early September. “I think [ENDA is] a high priority,” Schumer remarked. He blamed partisan division for the holdup in getting the act passed, which would protect employees from discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity. “In the old days, we had some Republican support when there was such a thing as a moderate Republican,” he said. “I think time is on our side,” he added. “I believe in much shorter time than we imagine, we’ll be able to pass ENDA.” Schumer had come to speak with writers at Politico. The shorter question and answer period came with bloggers and citizen journalists using work space organized by The PPL (theppl.us). : :

Inclusion a priority continued from page 12

Due largely to the progress gained by the gay and lesbian movement over the past decades, transgender individuals are slowly beginning to gain visibility as citizens are educated about non-socially normative ways of being and knowing. We can understand the extreme marginalization and social stigmas attached to transgender individuals by considering the less-than-human perception of gays and lesbians throughout the early and mid-20th century. Transgender people, too, share a history of marginalization with gays and lesbians that place them as one of the most vulnerable groups in our country. However, individuals within the framework of the gay and lesbian movement often discount this shared disenfranchisement. In fact, I’ve had many friends that identify as gay and lesbian but embody a blatant transphobia, claiming that “our” movement is distinct and separate from “theirs.” This is extremely problematic and troubling. So much of the rhetoric within the DNC has constructed distinct images of the “American Dream” between political parties. That is, Republicans build themselves to the “top” purely for themselves, abandoning everyone once they accomplish their personal vision of success. Democrats are portrayed as not forgetting the shoulders they stood on to get to the “top” and helping others build themselves up after achieving success. This metaphor, while problematic, fits well within the context of inclusion of transgender individuals in the gay and lesbian movement.

That is, individuals within normative society have come to understand transgender people through the lens of non-normative sexualities. While identifying as transgender doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with sexuality, the extreme marginalization gays and lesbians experienced in the past from the privileged dominant comes from the same place and the same frame of mind as transphobia. “Transcending gender” is a very personal and complicated experience and, yet, transgender individuals constantly find themselves having to put their identity into discourse for others. They are expected to compartmentalize who they are and why they are into categories, when their identity itself is a transcendence of rigid identity categories. After all, if lesbian, gay, and bisexual people don’t expect to validate why they live their lives differently than the dominant majority, why should we ever demand that explanation from anyone else? The visibility of transgender individuals within the political process is one of the most important steps to imagining a world where “equality” is a real and attainable ideal. The 13 transgender delegates that attended the DNC embodied a historic moment and laid the foundation for what will be a long road to social inclusion and full legal protection. It is indeed a cause for celebration. However, it is also a reminder for gays and lesbian to not forget our fight for full inclusion and legal protection of transgender individuals merely because we are finally beginning to experience legal inclusion ourselves. : :

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

qnotes

life

goqnotes.com/to/life

Man’s ‘armor’ can be stylish and comfy Tips for dressing your best from our fashion guru Dan Stroupe and local designer David Watkins by Dan Stroupe :: Contributing Writer

uits are a man’s uniform and armor, a grand opportunity of expression, or a torture device killing you softly with every wear. Let’s be honest, the general majority of men hate wearing suits. I’ll chalk it up to the casualization of dress in America and the insane notion that shirts with more than three buttons and pants made of anything but denim are a burden that need to be despised. But, a suit is the easiest way for a man to look good. David Watkins, founder of ABBEYDALE, a local men’s clothing label, agrees that you need to make a good first impression in business and for your personal ventures. David was kind enough to give me a free personal consultation and to go through the ins and outs of this sartorial skirmish for guys. Guys like David want men to look good, everywhere and at all times. Some basics about the kinds of suits that are out there: Ready to wear — Meaning you buy it at the store today with little-to-no adjustments made (generally the pants hemmed). These suits retail from $99 at places like Target to $1,000 in department stores and designer boutiques. They are factory made, constructed by machine featuring cheaper fabrics from China, India, Pacific and Middle-Eastern countries and made in those same countries. They are made from general patterns in three lengths: short, regular and tall with standard widths. Made to measure — This suit was custom made for you using your personal measurements and pattern, made by hand and machine. A tailor takes your measurements and makes a pattern specific to your body. Suits of this caliber range in the $1,000 to $2,000

range. They are generally constructed in New York or London in tailor shops with craftsmen with years of experience. Fabrics are sourced from the finest mills. Bespoke — A complete suiting experience with only the finest fabrics, technique and personal customization. This type of suit has multiple fittings, takes on average 75-80 hours of construction time and is only made by a master tailor. Fine fabrics are searched the world over and only from the finest mills and materials in England, Italy and the United States. All work is completely hand sewn and features silk threaded buttonholes, custom embroidery, surgeon’s cuffs, horsehair canvas throughout the body of the jacket lapels and a whole array of customization from specified lapel width to contrasting fabrics, stitching and cut varieties. These suits cost up from $5,000 and will last you a lifetime. Longevity is a primary reason for paying that extra cost for a well-made suit. David agrees, noting that a well-made suit could last 20 years when properly taken care of. “The more you invest,” and it is an investment, “the longer it will last” he asserts. Even if that investment is an altered off-the-rack suit it is still a better look and fit than a suit just out the door. Today, I have two suits. The first is an off-the-rack suit from Kenneth Cole. I had to buy a size up and take the midsection in to find sleeves that were long enough. For tall guys like myself, this is the hardest problem. In this, be mindful of the shoulders and make sure they follow the natural line of your body. This suit is a great basic in a dark grey, perfect for all times of year.

see Fashion on 18

Photographer: Brandon Shauf • Stylist and Model: Dan Stroupe Custom ABBEYDALE suit; Kenneth Cole shirt: Vintage tie, pocket square, and and watch; Shoes by Calvin Klein.

qnotes

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

qnotes

Monthly Dinner Meeting, Tuesday, September 18, 5:30-7:30 p.m. Speakers: Kevin Levine & Marcia Tillotson Program: The Lesbian and Gay Fund and $100,000+ to Charlotte’s LGBT Community Location: The LGBT Community Center of Charlotte 820 Hamilton St., Suite B11 (NC Music Factory) Reservations/Information: www.charlottebusinessguild.org

SPORTS

Playing the field

Match-ups from across the Carolinas: Softball World Series

Annual Lake Party, Saturday, September 29 Location: Private Residence on Lake Norman For more information, email businessguild@yahoo.com

by Jon Hoppel :: qnotes contributor

With over 4,000 participants and fans from 44 leagues in North America, the North American Gay Amateur Athletic Association’s (NAGAAA) Gay Softball World Series (GSWS) is the world’s largest annual LGBT sporting event. Taking place Aug. 13-18, Minneapolis, Minn., had the honor of hosting the 36th year of the tournament. To qualify, a team must compete in a NAGAAA sanctioned league, win the regular season championship, or win your league’s tournament. Unfortunately for many athletes in Charlotte and the rest of the Carolinas, there is not a NAGAAA approved league within a couple of hours travel, forcing many of the area’s athletes to travel to cities like Atlanta, Knoxville or Chattanooga in hopes of winning a league title and making it to the World Series. There were 151 teams split up into four divisions based on skill level and one based on age. Here is how the groups broke down: 11 teams in the highest skilled division, A; 35 teams in division B; 53 teams in division C; 44 in division D; and six teams in the Master’s division, which consists of only players 50 years of age or older. On Aug. 13 the festivities began with the Opening Ceremony held on picturesque Nicollet Island in downtown Minneapolis. In typical gay fashion, there was loud house music pumping all afternoon and evening, a drag queen doing drag queen things and plenty of alcohol to lubricate the conversations between teams all vying for the same prize. It is a great opportunity to meet players from all over the country (and Canada), trade team shirts and maybe find someone to “get to know” the rest of the week. Round-robin play started on Aug. 14 and continued through Aug. 15. Based on how a team performed, it was seeded against the rest of the teams in the division accordingly. With each team in the Series having already won their local leagues, proving that they are all good teams, the level of competition was very high and there were very few teams that won or lost all four of their

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Sept. 15-28 . 2012

round-robin games. After more than eight hours of play each day, the first two days of competition saw some incredible hitting and defense and more than a few frayed nerves as the competitive level at this year’s tournament was truly a step above previous years. The early favorites were dominant in the preliminary rounds. The Twin Cities Edge and the Orlando Royalty went 4-0 and earned a 1 and 2 seed in C division, respectively. The Atlanta Sluggers looked sharp in A, as well as Boston’s Cafe Club Angels in B and the Philly Honey Badgers in D. A fast forward to championship play on Aug. 18, where after three more eight-hour days of high level softball, 4 teams remained in each division. The highlights saw several close games in the top three divisions between the remaining teams. In the A division final, the Atlanta Sluggers came out on top because of an outstanding play made in the bottom of the final inning, runner on second and two outs. The Sluggers were in the field, trying to protect their one-run lead and hold on to the victory when the first basemen from the Phoenix Toros launched one deep to right center field. Everybody thought the game was over, and it was, but because the right fielder jumped up, scaled the fence and brought the game winning hit back over the fence to record the third out and end the game. In the B division, it was an all-California affair with the Long Beach Rounders 2.0 faced off against the San Diego Spikes. High scoring and well played, the game was exciting and close throughout, but the Rounders’ clutch hitting in the final two innings provided the difference that the Spikes just couldn’t overcome. The Tampa Venom in the C division came out of the loser’s bracket to claim the crown after beating the previously undefeated Orlando Royalty twice in the finals, making them the biggest upset win of the week. And their reward, besides a big shiny trophy? The top two finishing teams from each division, or

see next page u

life

goqnotes.com/to/life •••

Top four teams result in each division: A Division 1st: Atlanta Sluggers 2nd: Phoenix Roscoes Coors Light HP2 Toros 3rd: Chicago Menace 4th: Fort Lauderdale Noize B Division: 1st: Long Beach Rounders 2.0 2nd: San Diego Spikes 3rd: Boston Cafe Club Angels 4th: Portland Brewers C Division: 1st: Tampa Venom 2nd: Orlando Royalty 3rd: Atlanta Menace 4th: Houston Toros Jon Hoppel (l) and Shawn Carlton from ATL Genesis at the opening ceremony.

B, C and D, are bumped up and have to play at the next highest level the next season. This is the NAGAAA’s way of ensuring that no team dominates each and every year. All in all, Minneapolis was a great choice to host the series this year. The people were nice, the bars were plentiful and overall the sportsmanship was outstanding. I look forward to next year when Washington, D. C. takes its turn as the host of the world’s largest gay sporting event! : :

D Division: 1st: Seattle Inferno 2nd: Tulsa Razors 3rd: Philadelphia Honey Badgers 4th: Twin Cities Titans Masters Division: 1st: Seattle Strokes 2nd: LA Gang Grey 3rd: Chicago Sidetrack 4th: Twin Cities Line Drive

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Sept. 15-28 . 2012

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life

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Fashion guru shares solid tips continued from page 14

Fall Trends The second suit is a made-to-measure suit courtesy ABBEYDALE. This suit was completely custommade with a private consultation, fitting, fabric choices and buttons. My particular suit features peak lapels, surgeon’s cuffs (meaning they can be unbuttoned) and personalized embroidery. The impeccable tailoring and craftsmanship is evident in comparison. I decided to go with a blue as my first custom suit. Timeless style and complete versatility is the name of the game here. Suits are the staple in a man’s wardrobe. They are able to make you look your best for any occasion. Like anything, a little extra time, effort and money can go a long way in a sartorial investment. : : Grey Kenneth Cole suit; Shirt by Banana Republic, Shoes by Saks Fifth Avenue, Vest by Express Men; Vintage bowtie and watch.

Special Thanks to Brad Ward, Jonathan Studioso and their dog Baxter for the use of their beautiful home.

qnotes

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

Leathers: Calling all leather daddies, you’re on trend! A leather detail, tie, fantastic bag or boot brings a great contrast and depth to an outfit or article of clothing. Example: Gucci, featuring a fabulous pebbled leather jacket. Midnight Blue is the New Black: This dark (read slimming, queens!) blue was all over the runway from light silk shirts to heavy overcoats. A very versatile color, this color could become a great asset to your wardrobe. Example: Yves Saint Laurent in a fantastic inky-blue, perfectly tailored suit with black leather trim. Camel: Seen in many trousers and sweaters, camel is more of a color than a material in this instance. Though that camel hair sport coat will be a smash this fall, trust me. Example: John Varvatos layered sportswear ensemble. Bold Color: Color is still going strong as it has for a while now. Pantone analyzed that Rhubarb is definitely the color of the season. I think this can par well with your midnight suit and camel coat nicely, no? Example: Viktor and Rolf rhubarb suit with leather tie, burgundy leather gloves and boots. Classic Suiting: I hope you payed attention to the adjacent article because the classic, well-fitted suit is and always will be, in. Example: Burberry grey suit with polka dot shirt and tie and a coat to die for.

on the map nightlife

Midwood Madness, Petra’s half-price bottles of wine Karaoke, The Woodshed starts at 9 p.m.

Sunday

Barbeque & Bloody Marys, Bar at 316 free BBQ from 3-6 p.m. The Sunday Social Spades/Card Games & House Muzik, Nickel Bar from 5 p.m.-Midnight House Cast Show, The Scorpio with DJ 4Real. 11:30 p.m. Woodshed Sundays, The Woodshed free dinner buffet served at 6:30 p.m. karaoke, 9 p.m.

Friday

Game Night, Bar at 316 Team Trivia and Line Dancing, Hartigan’s starts at 8 p.m. Karaoke, Petra’s hosted by Rachel Houdek. 9 p.m. Wicked and Wild Wednesdays, The Scorpio featuring Tiffany Storm with DJ 4Real. 11 p.m. Pool Tournament, The Woodshed starts at 10:30 p.m.

House DJ and Dancing, Bar at 316 Free HIV Testing, Connections the 4th Friday of every month. 8-10 p.m. A-List Fridays, Marigny hosted by SugaWalls Entertainment. 10 p.m. Feel Good Fridays Dance Night, Nickel Bar from 9 p.m.-2:30 a.m. Live Performances, Petra’s Roxy’s Rainbow Review, The Rainbow In starts at 11p.m. Life’s a Drag, The Scorpio with Tiffany Storm. 11:30 p.m.

Thursday

Saturday

Wednesday

Monday

Movie Night, Bar at 316 starts at 9 p.m. Monday Madness, Chasers pool tournament at 11:30 p.m. $25 cash prize and $25 bar tab. Boxing & Monday Night Football, Sidelines Free Pool, The Woodshed all day.

Thursday Night House Party, Bar at 316 Pool Tournament, Central Station Rockin’ Well Thursdays, Chasers with Valerie Rockwell. Show starts at 12:30 a.m. Free HIV Testing, Connections the 2nd Thursday of every month. 8-10 p.m. Karaoke Night, Hartigan’s hosted by Roxxy C. Moorecox. 9 p.m. Team Boystown, Marigny starts at 10 p.m. $10 cover after 11 p.m. Drink-n-drown. SpeakEasy Thursday Open Mic Night, Nickel Bar from 9 p.m.-2:30 a.m. Karaoke Night, The Rainbow In free for members. $5 guests. $6 under 21.

Tuesday

Karaoke with Metro Mike, Bar at 316 starts at 9 p.m. Pool Tournament, Central Station Twisted Trivia, Chasers with Tiffany Storm & Brooklyn Dior. Showtime at 12:30 a.m. Trivia Tuesdays, Marigny hosted by Roxxy C. Moorecox 7 p.m.

Community

Underwear Night, The Woodshed

LGBT Community Center of Charlotte Seeks to promote diversity, acceptance and visibility of the LGBT community through original and collaborative programming and events and by providing an inclusive, welcoming and affordable environment for all. 820 Hamilton St., Suite B11 Charlotte, NC 28206 704-333-0144 gaycharlotte.com

House DJ and Dancing, Bar at 316 The Angela Lopez Show, Chasers show starts at 12:30 a.m. Live DJ, Hartigan’s Krewe Saturdays, Marigny Sexy Saturdays Special Events, Nickel Bar from 9 p.m.-2:30 a.m. Live Performances, Petra’s Urban Variety Show, The Scorpio with Elaine Davis. Midnight showtime.

White Rabbit North Carolina’s LGBT everything store. Complete line of Pride merchandise, plus magazines, books, DVDs, T-shirts, underwear, swimwear, athletic shorts, hats, hoodies, socks, and more. 920 Central Ave. Charlotte, NC 28204 704-531-9988 . phone 704-531-1361 . fax info@whiterabbitbooks.com

info: Don’t see your bar listed here? Submit your regularly scheduled events to editor@goqnotes.com Nightlife content the responsibility of each business listed.

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Sept. 15-28 . 2012

qnotes

tell trinity

by Trinity :: qnotes contributor

Gay bars and cigarette smoke go hand and fist Hey Trinity, I’ve been going to gay clubs for years. But it seems like the smoke is worse than ever. It makes me so angry when everyone knows the consequences of smoking. Where else am I going to meet the man of my dreams? Smoke Free Guy, Wilton Manors, FL Hey Smoke Free Guy, Cigarette smoke does seem like “smoker’s revenge” to those of us who like clubs, but don’t smoke. Many U.S. states have no smoking rules, but not every gay man lives in these states. Pumpkin, let’s try hanging out at outside bars. Let’s try joining a spiritual, educational, athletic or hobby group. And, lastly, let’s try raising your consciousness as to where you will find the man of your dreams. The more adventurous you are in finding a man, the more adventurous that man will be. Go get ‘em! My Dear Trinity, Life’s awful! My girlfriend unexpectedly died a few months ago. I lost my job. And, now my rent’s going up. I often think about checking out of life! Why is life so awful? Discouraged, Reno, NV My Dear Discouraged, Life, the big banquet between birth and death, always has shortfalls and climaxes. I see life like a heartbeat monitor. When the beat is up, everything looks like a “Night at the Oscars.” When the beat is down, everything looks like a Holocaust Museum tour. The trick is riding the downbeat knowing that the upbeat will absolutely return. Sweetie, you must rest

qnotes

Sept. 15-28 . 2012

assured that the heartbeat monitor will rise to the celebration of your life again. For now, repeat five times a day, “I trust the process of life.” And, “This too shall pass.” (Try to heed my warning by reading my cartoon.) Dear Trinity, I’m not a gay man, but I often get looked at and approached by gay men. What can I do to stop it? Straight, Cleveland, OH Dear Straight, We should all have such problems! I asked a few of my nongay friends what they do and this is what they said. “Why stop it? It’s a compliment. Anytime a gay guy flirts with me, I flirt back for a while and then I tell him ‘I’m straight. It’s cool!’” Others say, “I’m an attractive woman. It happens! I love it.” So, darling, if you absolutely feel the need to stop these culturally enlightened beings from wanting to know you or appreciate you then stop putting so much mousse in your hair, stop dressing so impeccably and stop being so polite. And, if that doesn’t work, then wear a wedding ring, puka beads or those tacky K-Mart flip flops. Hello Trinity, My partner and I have now had a third person enter our relationship. We are all new to the “threesome” way of life. Any advice? Threesome, Los Angeles, CA Hello Threesome, I suppose the name Trinity does

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imply that I have some insight into things relating to threes. Unfortunately, MTV and VH1 specials are the only place where I’ve seen threesome relationship stories. You are one of many, but still in the minority, thus you must create the rules as you go along. So, honey, look for books on the subject, or even better, be the one who writes, “The First Book on Threesomes.” But, for now here’s: Trinity’s Practical Tips For A Threesome Relationship 1. A king size bed and a spare room is a must. 2. Make friends (just friends) with other threesome couples. 3. Honor each other’s secrets and/or privacy! Adults have secrets! 4. Always cook extra. 5. Accept that all of your family may not understand. 6. Every three months sit down and renegotiate the rules. 7. Take vacations, as well as personal time alone. 8. Play Trinity’s CD’s while making love. Available on my website. 9. Stay in the moment. The future is not here yet. 10. T ake plenty of notes for our, I mean, your book. : : — With a Masters of Divinity, Reverend Trinity hosted “Spiritually Speaking” a weekly radio drama performed globally and is now minister of WIG: Wild Inspirational Gatherings. info: www.telltrinity.com . Trinity@telltrinity.com Sponsored by: WIG Ministries Gay Spirituality for the Next Generation! www.wigministries.org

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out in the stars by Charlene Lichtenstein :: qnotes contributor

September 15 - 28 Mercury in Libra lights up our life and gives us the glib gift of gab. But, don’t waste all this capability on just blowing hot air around. Use it to fan the flames of desire and get to where you really want to go. Do you know where you really want to go? VIRGO (08.24-09.23) What is your net worth? Practical queer Virgins gain a new perspective on valuations — investments and expensive do-dads. How will you control the flow when your dough is squandered on wanton pals and wasteful partners? You may blow your wad on frivolous ventures and be led astray. Thank your lucky stars and save something for a rainy day! Drip. Drip. Drip. LIBRA (09.24-10.23) Act on your visions, proud Libra. You will have opportunities to take advantage of fortuitous first meetings and brand new projects. Take a courageous leap and capitalize on the results. But, do it for personal rather than professional reasons. There are a few landmines in your career that need to be cleared before you bulldoze through with your tank. Take your time. SCORPIO (10.24-11.22) Proud Scorps get a case of the self-analyzing jitters. While a little introspection is good for the soul, don’t waste time contemplating your own navel. Put your creative juices to work volunteering for community service. There is fun to be had, as well as a nice karmic payoff. So, get out there bubbele. Who knows whose navel you’ll soon be contemplating? SAGITTARIUS (11.23-12.22) Friends and social groups are pivotal now. Gay Archers become extraordinarily adept social directors, planning get-togethers and events that become the envious talk of the town. You are able to add a delightful dollop of magic to every encounter. And, all the action centers in your own backyard. So, how much action can you get? Loads if you are lucky. CAPRICORN (12.23-01.20) The time period brings out the political strategist in you. If professional goals have proven to be elusive try a different approach now. Senior staff meetings can serve as fresh opportunities to stake your claim for the advancement that you so richly deserve. A word of advice: Keep your thoughts focused. There are wet blankets out there who can dilute the impact of your best ideas. AQUARIUS (01.21-02.19) If you are itching to travel and reach out, circumstances make it possible to plan a fabulous adventure. Higher education is also highlighted for Aqueerians itching to learn a thing or two. It is so easy to procrastinate and chain yourself to your desk. In fact, you have the time and the money to make your dreams come true. Don’t sit home and scratch your head over it. PISCES (02.20-03.20) Guppies are tempted to daydream their life away. Fight the temptation! This is the time to forge deeper, personal attachments and learn a few new things about what makes you tick. This time spance brings you luck and romance albeit one that is transitory and illusionary. Who cares? If sex is part of the equation, multiply it rather than divide it. You are a prime number. ARIES (03.21-04.20) Take some time to consider the current state of your relationships. Are you getting what you need? Things become flirty and squirty if you can overlook partners’ fatal flaws and enjoy the moment and madness. For those gay Rams who are still on the hoof, this time period offers a bit of serendipity and unexplainable coincidences. Don’t ask why. Ask who, what, how and when. TAURUS (04.21-05.21) Separate the wheat from the chaff in your job. Try not to hold on to any delusions about what you can and cannot accomplish in a day. Prioritization is what keeps you sane now. As with the job, health issues can also be addressed. Reduce stress by hanging around friends and letting off some steam. If that doesn’t work, try

a steam room with a bunch of strangers. GEMINI (05.22-06.21) You may experience a burst of creativity and seek wildly crazy extremes for your jolly times. The warning is that you may not know when enough is enough and can either dissipate your energies or screw up a fine romance. Pink Twins do not see limits now or choose to ignore them. The jovial inner voice prods you on. Will it also hogtie and brand you? Ohhh! CANCER (06.22-07.23) Gay Crabs are tempted to cocoon, hang around the house and attend to all those nitty projects that never seem to get done. Good. Use this time to create a comfortable and romantic home environment in preparation for a feisty time. Get into some mischief by filling your space with far-flung friends and a few well flung strangers. Just don’t fling it too far, friend. LEO (07.24-08.23) Proud Lions have trouble reining in their imaginative thoughts. It is not a bad thing to let your ideas roam wild. You never know where they can lead you! In fact, trying a more creative and offbeat approach to seemingly intractable issues may convince even ardent skeptics to agree to your way of thinking. Oh, do you have them fooled! : : © 2012 Madam Lichtenstein, LLC. All Rights Reserved. Entertainment. info: Visit www.TheStarryEye.com for e-greetings, horoscopes and Pride jewelry. My book “HerScopes: A Guide To Astrology For Lesbians” from Simon & Schuster is available at bookstores and major booksites.

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life

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20 Questions Vito Abate, Charlotte by David Stout :: david@goqnotes.com

First in his NYC home, then in Denver for four years and now in the Queen City for nearly a decade, Vito Abate has distinguished himself in the realm of theater. He has received Metrolina Theatre Association nominations for producing, directing, choreography and acting (a win for “South Pacific”) and claimed both the Emerging Artist and Theatre Person

of the Year awards. Currently, he’s directing “A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum” at Theatre Charlotte. In addition, Vito is co-producer and host of “Just Do It,” a reading and performance series at Theatre Charlotte that returns Oct. 12 with its third annual dog-themed, dogfriendly show (scheduled to be a Takeover

Friday event). Perhaps best of all, Vito has produced five fundraisers for Time Out Youth and co-authored an awarding-winning short play about TOY members’ experiences called “Just Like You.” Last, but definitely not least, 20 Questions is obsessed with his YouTube “dollmation” series, “Little People, Big Lives.” Follow the twisted dramatics of Jane,

Lisi and the entire gang on his vitotheatre channel. Ok, enough! On with the column! [Imperious clap!] Who’s birthday should be a national gay holiday? Since Christmas is already one, I’d say it’s a toss up between Judy Garland, Wanda Sykes and Anderson Cooper. Do you own a pair of button fly jeans? I do, however they’ve mysteriously shrunk while hanging in my closet. My first was a previously loved pair of 501s given to me when I was 20. They changed my life. If loose lips sink ships, what do pouty lips do? Pouty lips ruin a party like a party pooper… unless they’re matched with dreamy bedroom eyes, in which case they can start a party. What made Olive Oyl worth fighting over? While some men are into long necks, I think it was more about overcompensation for deeply repressed feelings between Popeye and Brutus. Is it harder for you to get up too early or stay up too late? I’ve always been a night owl. Getting up when it’s still dark, unless you’re a baker, seems unnatural. Which currently running Broadway show would you most like to be a part of? While I’d have to take the Ed Asner role, I’d love to work with Paul Rudd in “Grace.” Of course, I wouldn’t mind playing Perón in “Evita” with my ex, Ricky Martin. What’s your favorite variety of Girl Scout cookie? Peanut Butter Sandwich. But, I don’t approve of forced labor and making those little girls sell them, especially while wearing those horrible drab costumes. How do these films rank based on the number of times you’ve seen them: “Dick Tracy” (1990), “Flash Gordon” (1980), “Tarzan, The Ape Man” (1981), “The Shadow” (1994)? Sure, that order works. Um, is it possible to rank multiple zeros? Can you name all seven deadly sins from memory? Yes, we did a show on them last year! The seven are Anger, Sloth, Pride, Envy, Lust, Sleepy and Dopey. Just don’t ask me to pick a favorite. How many decorative pillows do you have on your bed when it’s fully made?

see 20 Questions on 23

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NC Pride set to light up Triangle area Thousands will gather for parties, festival and parade by Matt Comer :: matt@goqnotes.com

DURHAM — Thousands will travel from across the state toward Raleigh and Durham at the end of this month for the annual NC Pride Fest and Parade. The state’s longest-running Pride festivity, the event has seen it’s fair share of challenges recently. After violating Internal Revenue Service disclosure rules for several years in a row, NC Pride lost its tax-exempt status last year. But, organizers have pulled the group back from the brink, with director John Short restructuring it as a for-profit business venture and announcing one of the most exciting event line-ups ever. Events kick off on Wednesday, Sept. 26 with cocktail events and parties in Durham and Raleigh. Former Village People singer Randy Jones will host a Pride Cocktail Hour at Strawvalley Cafe, 5420 Durham Chapel Hill Blvd. in Durham on Sept. 26 at 8 p.m.

On Friday, Sept. 29, things really get exciting, as more than a dozen nightlife parties, mixers, dinners and other special events are planned in Raleigh, Durham and Chapel Hill. Of course, Saturday, Sept. 27, is when all the real action will take place. NC Pride’s annual festival at Duke University’s East Campus kicks off with the NC Pride 5k Phantom Run and Walk at 8:30 a.m. Festival grounds open at 10 a.m. with an ecumenical church service at 11 a.m. At noon, a Pride rally with the parade’s marshall and other dignitaries is scheduled. The annual parade begins at 1 p.m. On Saturday evening, another round of parties takes over the entire region. In Raleigh, the Bud Light Night Festival on Hargett St. will feature a food truck jamboree with entertainment. : : For more information on this year’s schedule of events, visit ncpride.org. : :

If you go: NC Pride Fest & Parade, Sat., Sept. 29, 10 a.m.-6 p.m., Duke University, East Campus. For more information and directions, visit ncpride.org.

20 Questions continued from page 22

Only two. More get in the way and often aren’t comfortable at all. I confess I have a serious issue with too many pillows on beds and sofas. Who was your favorite member of “The Cosby Show” clan? Rudy...but only when she was little and cute. I resent those adorable young characters when they get big. Do you have a shoe rack/tree in your home? Yes, both. But shoes are only in one of them. I am not able to divulge what is in the other. Which popular musical group/band from your youth had the hottest lead singer? The Partridge Family’s Keith. It looked like he could really play the guitar. And, it’s not like they were a fake group like The Archies, right? Are you more likely to add salt or pepper to your food? Salt for sure. Pepper is overrated and makes you sneeze in cartoons. Most people only say yes to it in restaurants due to peer pressure. Have you ever been on a zipline? No, but I do have a recurring dream of me squealing like a happy pig while on one and then it snaps and I fall to my death.

What’s your favorite movie adaptation of a musical? “Oklahoma.” The movie opens up the music with gorgeous scenery, a beautiful Shirley Jones and the guy who played Palmer Cortlandt on “All My Children.” (Wait, did you expect “Sound of Music”?) Spam, vienna sausages or potted meat? Ok, so there’s a nuclear holocaust and I’m trapped and desperate in some sort of mobile home bunker, yes? Sounds like a good time for a crash diet. Who’s the sexiest “William” of all time? William Shatner: The “Star Trek” years. The combination of his acting style, his real hair and the way he sucked in his gut in those uniforms was hot! What was your worst trick-or-treating costume? I have blocked them all from my mind. We were very anti costumes-out-ofthe-box-with-masks. It seems like all my costumes involved a flannel shirt and a bad hat. Which is greater, the number of siblings you have or the number of times you’ve played a woman onstage? It’s a tie, sort of. I played a Siamese twin in a circus, who turned out to be a man; and have played a few characters of questionable gender. : :

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drag rag special by Miss Della qnotes contributor

Catching up on the pageant scene It’s Miss Della here with a quick little ditty, long overdue (months actually!) about what's going on with Don't H8 pageantry. I'd mentioned one or two of these contests in former columns, but it is time to come clean for these kids and update all of you on what I've missed out on (or messed up on, as the case may be). I remember well as I was travelling to the Mr. contest back in the day and said that I was going up to see Tucker Wood relinquish his title. Actually, Tucker was giving up Mr. Club Odyssey some time later! I was so embarrassed because I knew my dear friend Stone Parque was giving up Mr. Don't H8. He ended up passing along his title to David Bryant and David's runners-up were Sebastian Armonte and Monte St. James. Just a short time later, back in Winston-Salem, Candace St. James won Miss Don't H8 (for biological and post-op females), and her runners-up were Domaniqua LaCoochieSwab (yep, that's her name!) and Victoria Velvet. Again, a few weeks later, Miss Don't H8 DIVA (for impersonators) was held and Eureka O' Hara won. Her runners-up were Andrea Carlisle, Malayia Chanel Iman and Buff Faye. The Don't H8's mission statement is: "To recognize and celebrate each individuals' differences through our message of one voice, one song, one dance can make a change!" The officers in the organization are Chip Matthews, Felicity Ferraro, Jayda Clyne, Bryan Black, Justin Johnson, Aurora Scott Carlisle and Akilah Collins. : :

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(top left) Mr Don’t H8 2010 Chip Matthew, King of Don’t H8 Jason Dottley, Mr Don’t H8 2011 Stone Parque (top right) Queen of Don’t H8, Kimberly Caldwell of ‘American Idol’

info: Drop me a line, OK? TheTeaMissD@yahoo.com •••

(bottom) Front row: Mr. Don’t H8 2012 David Bryant, former Miss Diva Monica Jefferies, former Mr. Chip Matthews. Back row: Miss Diva 2012 Eureka O’Hara, Miss Don’t H8 Candace St. James, former Miss Diva Felicity Ferraro, former Diva Derrick Barry of ‘America’s Got Talent’

Some more on the pageant The system dates back to 2010 when Chip Matthews won the Mr. Don’t H8 title. He was joined by Monica Jefferies as Miss Don’t H8 and Derrick Barry as Diva Don’t H8. The following year, “Sordid Lives” and Billboard recording artist Jason Dottley won the lifetime King Don’t H8 title and “American Idol” contestant Kimberly Caldwell netted the lifetime Queen Don’t Hate crown. The Mr. title was won by Stone Parque; Miss, Barbara Maberry, Diva, Felicity Ferraro; Teen, Travis Stancil; Lil Miss, Aubrie Jayde; and Logan H, Lil Mr. Caldwell is a straight ally who champions LGBT causes. Out N Proud Productions contributed to the development financially and SJ Photography provided photographs. WinstonSalem’s Club CO2 also serves as a avid supporter. Jeff Reeves of the Unlimited System also assisted with the effort by providing guidance. Contestants are judged on Interview, Evening Gown or Formal Wear and Talent. : : — Research courtesy enotes.com Photography SJ Photography

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InFocus: Community Resources — Faith Institutions [Ed. Note — Beginning with this issue, qnotes will rotate various community resources and list them here. These community groups are here to serve you and we know of no better way to simply inform the public of their good works than by giving you the opportunity to connect with them and get involved. Don’t see your group listed and want to join in? Shoot us an email with “InFocus addition” in the subject line to editor@goqnotes.com.] Charlotte Atheists and Agnostics charlotteatheists.com MCC Charlotte 1825 Eastway Dr., Charlotte NC 28205 704-563-5810, mcccharlotte.org Myers Park Baptist Church 1900 Queens Rd., Charlotte, NC 28207 704-334-7232, mpbconline.org Havurat Tikvah 980-225-5330, havurattikvah.org

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Holy Covenant United Church of Christ 3501 W. WT Harris Blvd., Charlotte NC 28269 704-599-9810, holycovenantucc.org Holy Trinity Lutheran Church 1900 The Plaza, Charlotte, NC 28205 704-377-5439 htlccharlotte.org/ New Life MCC 1900 The Plaza, Charlotte, NC 28205 704-334-0350, newlifemccnc.org Piedmont Unitarian Universalist Church 9704 Mallard Creek Rd., Charlotte, NC 28262 704-510-0008, puuc.org Seigle Avenue Presbyterian Church 600 Seigle Ave., Charlotte, NC 28204 704-338-1914, seigleavenue.org St. Martin’s Episcopal Church 1510 E. 7th St., Charlotte NC 28204 704-376-8441, stmartins-charlotte.org

St. Peter’s Catholic Church 507 South Tryon St., Charlotte, NC 28202 704-332-2901 stpeterscatholic.org/gay_lesbian_ministry Spiritual Living Center 1025 E. 35th St., Charlotte, NC 28205 704-665-1886, slccharlotte.com Temple Beth El 5101 Providence Rd. Charlotte, NC 28226 704-366-1948, beth-el.com

Unitarian Universalist Church of Charlotte 234 Sharon Amity Rd., Charlotte, NC 28211 704-366-8623, uuccharlotte.org Unity Fellowship Church 2127 Eastway Dr., Charlotte, NC 28205 704-567-5007, ufccharlottenc.org Wedgewood Baptist Church 4800 Wedgewood Dr., Charlotte, NC 28210 704-523-6108, wedgewoodbaptist.com

Sept. 15 • Charlotte One Community Cares Car Wash Come show your support as Chi Psi Omega Fraternity, Inc., kicks off its One Community Cares project for 2012. Last year the group was able to provide toiletry care packages to over 250 homeless people in the Charlotte area. Proceeds from car wash will help purchase blankets, soap, shampoo/conditioner, deodorant, etc. for our homeless brothers and sisters. O’Reilly’s Auto Parts, 4700 N. Tryon St. 11 a.m.-3 p.m. chipsiomegafraternity.org.

Duke University’s LGBT student group at the 2009 NC Pride Parade.

Pride Statewide

There’s more Pride festivities across the Carolinas this fall than you can shake a stick at! Upcoming events listed below, but, of course, be sure to check out the official event websites for more details! Upstate Pride • Sept. 22 This fall’s bout of Pride festivals kicks off with Greenville’s 2012 Upstate Pride SC March & Festival at Barnet Park. For more details, visit upstatepridesc.org. NC Pride • Sept. 29 Durham’s NC Pride Fest and Parade on Sept. 29 will light up the streets of the Bull City. A vendor fair and full parade are the highlight of the weekend, along with nightlife events and more. Learn more at ncpride.org. Blue Ridge Pride • Oct. 6 Need a bit of fresh mountain air? Head up to Asheville for Blue Ridge Pride on Oct. 6. More information at blueridgepride.com. Winston-Salem Pride • Oct. 13 Equality Winston-Salem presents the Twin City’s second annual Pride, with headliner Taylor Dayne. For more information, visit equalitywinstonsalem.org. SC Pride • Oct. 20 With a parade and festival, South Carolina’s capital city glows with rainbow. More details at scpride.org/ festival/.

Sept. 15 • Raleigh Solidarity with Planned Parenthood Equality NC and Planned Parenthood co-host a special event to raise awareness and bring collaborative support to the issues important to North Carolina’s women and LGBT people. ORO Restaurant and Lounge, 18 E. Martin St. 2-4 p.m. $100 admission/donation. Visit equalitync.org for more information. Sept. 15 • Salisbury Autumn Soiree Salisbury-Rowan PFLAG hosts their annual fundraiser and scholarship granting event. Keynote speaker is openly lesbian Charlotte City Councilmember LaWana Mayfield. Looking Glass Artists Center, 405 N. Lee St. 6-10 p.m. salisbury-pflag.org. Sept. 15 • Charlotte Off White Party Celebrate the end of summer at the Off White Party, “After Dark,” with DJ Tristan Jaxx. Marigny Dance Club, 1440 S. Tryon St. 10 p.m. $12/advance. $15/door. 18+ to enter. 21+ to drink. justtwirl.com.

Sept. 18 • Charlotte HRC Gala Recruitment Party 2013 Human Rights Campaign North Carolina Gala co-chairs and other committee members invite you to learn more about how you can get involved in next February’s dinner event. Light snacks provided. Petra’s, 1919 Commonwealth Ave. 6:30 p.m., meet and greet. 7 p.m., program. hrccarolina.org. Sept. 21-23 • Charlotte Festival in the Park Charlotte’s outdoor arts and crafts festival returns for its 48th year at Freedom Park with more than 180 arts and crafts exhibits. Enjoy performing and visual arts, several stages of local and regional entertainment, food and family-friendly fun. Freedom Park, 1900 East Blvd. Friday, 4-9:30 p.m. Saturday, 10 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Sunday, 11 a.m.-6 p.m. festivalinthepark.org. Sept. 22 • Charlotte Randy Roberts Potts The GayCharlotte Film Series presents Randy Roberts Potts, the gay grandson of televangelist Oral Roberts and a film screening of “For The Bible Tells Me So,” a documentary exploring anti-LGBT religious prejudice. Metropolitan Community Church, 1825 Eastway Dr. 6 p.m. $20/general. $15/students and seniors. gaycharlottefilmfestival.com.

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Sept. 26 • Chapel Hill Trans Discussion The NC Harm Reduction Coalition hosts a twice-monthly meeting for people who identify as transgender, gender-queer, or gender-questioning. A safe space to share, process, support, and organize. Internationalist Books, 405 W. Franklin St. 8-10 p.m. internationalistbooks.org. nchrc.org. Sept. 29 • Winston-Salem A View From the Top Winston-Salem Pride hosts a pre-Pride party on the rooftop of downtown’s Nissen Building. 310 W. 4th St. 8-11 p.m. For more information, visit equalitywinstonsalem.org.

Evangelist Oral Roberts and his son Randy Roberts Potts

Sept. 15-16 • Charlotte Open auditions: ‘Bent’ Queen City Theatre Company will hold open auditions for its production of “Bent,” Martin Sherman’s powerful drama about the persecution of homosexuals in Nazi Germany. Education Studio, Spirit Square, 345 N. College St. Saturday, 3-6 p.m. Sunday, 3-5 p.m. queencitytheatre.com.

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Sept. 15-28 . 2012