Becoming a religious sister

ecoming a religious sister

Words Sister Yen Thi Bui | Illustration Denisse Hernandez | Design Denisse Hernandez

In 2007, one year after I graduated from Luong Son High School in Phu Tho, Vietnam, I had a difficult time persuading my mom to allow me to become a religious sister. I believed that if God wanted me to follow Him, He would change my mom’s mind and guide me on the journey.

One beautiful evening, I walked alone in the wild, flowery garden near my house. The sun was shining in my eyes and on my long black hair. I followed a colorful butterfly waving her tiny yellow-black wings around wildflowers in the garden. Suddenly, she perched on my left shoulder. I tilted my neck slightly toward the left with my whole body still, worrying she might fly away. However, she remained on my shoulder, waving two glowing wings up and down. Very gently, I took her and ran home to put her in a big jar and stared at her. I really enjoyed watching her play.

As usual, I sank into prayer in order to discern God’s will for my life. I knelt on the carpet and looked at an image of Jesus Christ crucified on the cross; the scent of the candles and flowers seemed to bring me to a dream that I had been thinking of since I was in secondary school. It was to enter the convent; I was 22 now, and I still played with the thought in my mind. I asked myself whether God was really calling me to live a consecrated life.

I recalled my difficult time in December 2005 when I first mentioned my wish to enter the convent to my mother.

Mom, I want to join the vocation class in the parish, I said.

Are you kidding me? Mom replied. Where did your idea come from?”

I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you my intention, I answered. I was inspired to live a consecrated life when I saw photos of some religious sisters serving the children in the center working at Nhat Hong Center for the Blind and Visually Impaired in Sai Gon.

My mom continued, I don’t know. I want you to become a teacher. Don’t you remember?

Coming closer to her and grabbing her hands, I said, I know, Mom! But I didn’t dare to talk to you.

You make me sad. I’m waiting for you to become a teacher who can make money and support the family, my mom said. However, I need time to think about this.

Late night when everyone was sleeping, I was alone on the porch and saw a meteor flying off in the sky. I paused and prayed, Dear Lord, if you want me to follow you, please help me!

The meteor flew fast as if there was something very special for the one who just saw it. I folded my hands and prayed, My dear Lord, please bless my dream to become ‘a beautiful star’ in the convent. The sky seemed to become lighter. I softly opened the door and went to my bed, full of thoughts in my mind. Please convert my mom’s thought, Lord! I continued praying as I drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, I woke up earlier than usual. I went out to the garden and took a water pipe to water the cabbage garden. The sun was shining, covering the cabbage garden, making it fresh with tiny dew drops that seemed to be visiting the leaves. I felt refreshed at the moment of a new day as I listened to the chirpings of sparrows in the trees around my house.

While I was almost blown away by the beauty of nature, my mom walked closer to me and said, “My

darling! I have carefully pondered on your dream. You are mature now, make your own decisions for your vocation!”

Mom! You agree for me to go, don’t you? I asked.

I don’t want to become a barrier to your holy dream! she said. Nonetheless, my mom shed tears and worried, You’ve never gone far away from our house! How will you be familiar with living, eating and sleeping in the convent? How can you get along with other unknown girls? You will have to get up really early around 4 a.m.

Don’t be too worried, Mom! I believe in God. He will lead me gradually in how to follow Him, I replied happily.

The smile in my eyes and on my lips grew when I thought my dream would come true.

Mom! I do not know when I will come back to visit you, I said to her with my hands around her waist.

You can change your mind now and stay home, she answered sadly.

I did not want to cry, but my eyes filled with tears as I looked at the familiar village path that I had traveled every day. I loved my neighbors because they were friendly and worked hard.

What way am I going to go? I wondered. I could not know right now. My future had not come yet. It rained in the afternoon. The road in our small village became difficult to travel after rainy, windy days.

The next day, the shining sun approached and covered my face. The flowers bloomed and the grass was richly green. I prayed, Dear Lord, please grant your peace to my homeland.

I was a little bird who was leaving my sweet home to look for a fresh spring that I had dreamed about. Now, I could spread my tiny wings and soar in the wide sky. However, in my heart, I will never forget where I had grown up and was taken care of by my dear mom and the beloved people. The clouds looked like waves hanging in the sky.

I couldn’t even begin to imagine the miracles that God would do because I chose to “set out” according to the call of the heart, of the ideal, and especially by Jesus who loved me before I knew Him.

Mom,” I whispered, I am leaving you and my childhood in the village and carrying with me profound gratitude for being born and raised in this lovely family. You all have inspired and supported me throughout my life. I believe that you will always accompany me all the way in my religious vocation by your encouragement and constant prayers as I am going to keep you and all my beloved people in my daily prayers.

Do not worry, my mother said. Trust that Jesus will come to remain with us as a spiritual Bridegroom when you devote your whole mind and heart to become His Bride in the convent.

Soon, I would set off on my journey to go to Congregation of the Lovers of the Holy Cross in Ha Noi.

I pondered, “The love of Christ urges me.” (2 Cor 5, 14).

Sister Yen Thi Bui belongs to the Congregation of the Lovers of the Holy Cross of Hung Hoa Diocese in Ha Noi, Vietnam. This is the convent’s chapel.