RKYV ONLINE # 3

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TABLE OF CONTENTS RKYV # 3 {July 31 - Aug 30} RKYV ONLINE LOGO - David Marshall { current } { original - Roy G James, orig. online adaption - Randy Pare } Virtual Cover # 3 - by Tom Parrish Editorial Column "Pass The Stuffing" - Randy Pare {Aug 21} Health Columns "So how are feeling today?" Leanne Stiers {Aug 30} "From the Guy's Corner" - C.S. Cartier {Aug 25} Gallery Art -

2 pieces by Marc Ngui 1 piece by Lee-Ann Marie Macdonald 1 piece by Jillian Haldeman 3 pieces by Stan Nelson Poetry “ Poems from the Gulf of Arabia” - by Maha B.M.{July 31} “Meaningless Jibber Jabber” - by Mandie Fortin {Aug 1} “Just Some Spinning Fools...” - by R.J. Pare’ {Aug 25 } Long Fiction -

8 pieces by Elza Von Zansen 3 pieces by Roy G. James 3 pieces by Fatma Adra 5 pieces by Wiehahn Mundey 2 pieces by Andy Richardson 2 pieces by Matthew Hatt

Family Life Column “My Journal” - by Mandie Fortin {Aug 22}

10 pieces by Mike Grattan

Pop Culture Columns “Living in a Second Life” - by Jillian Haldeman

3 pieces by Laura Grattan

“Coffee and Cigarettes” - by David Marshall {Aug 7}

The Acts - by Roy G. James

“Those Who Stood... Those Who Fell...”- by R.J. Pare {Aug 31}


Pass the Stuffing Letter from the Editor {Aug 21} So, how has your summer been? The obligatory salutation of course, but what a summer it has been. RKYV ONLINE's contributors are a varied and talented bunch! The edgy alternative offerings of Elza Von Zansen, formerly known as SuicideHappy {the artwork will hopefully be re-posted soon, FaceBook mixup... poor dear....lol} has added to the already stellar talents of regular contributors like Wiehahn Mundey, Fatma Adra, Matthew Hatt, Tom Parrish... etc. etc. The variety of styles and influences will hopefully provide the "synergy" to inspire these artists with each new piece they share and review for each other. The writing has been going along nicely, we may have our first spin-off title coming soon.... I will give more info as I have it... But a certain kung-fu simian, previously displayed in our gallery, may have his own TITLE in addition to our monthly RKYV!!! The artist Stan Nelson, graphic designer Dave Marshall and I yer humble writer/editor have been working on this for weeks now.... we'll share more info as we have it... Keep your eyes out! Which brings me to my point for this editorial. RKYV ONLINE encourages all of our talented contributors to reach out to one another and take this magazine to the NEXT level... By that I mean, COLLABORATE! Now it may not be for everyone, but if you are an artist looking for a writer... or a writer seeking an artist... this is a social network! Feel free to message each other and find people to work together with! Now I am not saying everyone should run out and start a comic/graphic novel....:) But I am saying that even if it is merely a visual accompanying a single piece of writing... This can be an effective way of developing our crafts and learning to work within 'project style' frameworks.. with first drafts and deadlines... and the compromise and teamwork necessary to allow for more than one creative vision. These are important skills to develop as we polish our crafts. And hey, any projects that ya have on the go in this nature... feel free to let me know and maybe we can put teasers up for "coming soon!!!" Keep it real Keep it going

I Heart U - by Stan Nelson

1 Mommy? - by Stan Nelson


Health From The Guy’s Corner - by C.S. Cartier {Aug 25} Gentlemen, does your pee pee work? A Guy’s Corner exclusive: I’m not a doctor, but I play one on TV. Well, I would if I acted. Before I get into my article just an update on a previous article. Omega-3 has natural healing factors as previously stated. I’m not going to go into it again, I just wanted to state that I am now able to give amounts that are “how much”. If you are looking for the mental benefits, you are going to want to take three a day. The anti-inflammatory benefits would be four a day. How do you know if you have a quality fish oil product? Combined the total amounts of DHA and EPA (they will be clearly indicated on the side) take that total and divide it by the total in the capsule. For example, I’m taking Omega-3 with EPA of 400 and DHA of 200. They total to 600 mg divided by 1065 mg capsule. You are looking for a product that is higher then 30%, in my case it is 56 and change percent. What does this mean, well simply it means that the product is purified and concentrated. That’s all I have to say about that. Onto today’s topic: Sooner or later, most guys will have issues or concerns with the prostate gland. This could range to mean a great many things and doesn't have to mean prostate cancer, but two common prostate problems can cause quite a bit of discomfort. Lets get technical for a moment. The prostate is a gland just below the bladder in men. The main function of the prostate is to store and secrete a clear fluid that constitutes 1030% of the volume of the semen. The prostate also contains some smooth muscles that help expel semen during ejaculation.. Many will whisper about it in the locker room, but don’t really have a clue to what it is or what it is for. Well, now you know. The better question is, what can you and I do to maintain a healthy prostate. Fear begins to grow in guys with the graying hair and I say you have power and control over your body and health. A healthy human prostate is slightly larger than a walnut. Unfortunately it can be felt during a rectal examination. Embarrassing, yes. Necessary, again and unfortunately, yes.

2 Ali - by Mike Grattan

Ratpack - by Mike Grattan


First off, it is a good idea to know as to what you are fighting or preventing. Here are two prostate issues that sound fancy and make me look smarter then I am. Prostatitis, is the infection or inflammation that can affect men of any age. (Remember, any age means if you stand to pee it could be you.). Prostatitis could be acute and chronic bacterial. They are treated with antibiotics The second, benign prostatic hypertrophy (BPH), is the enlargement of the prostate gland that affects many men in there 60s and 70s. The main side effect is that the enlarged gland squeezes the urethra, making it difficult to empty the bladder and causing frequent, dissatisfying urination. Prostate cancer is the most common form of cancer affecting men and sadly the major cause of death. Once the lining of the prostate is affected with cancer, the only known treatments are surgery and radiation therapy. Both may limit your ability to get the general to stand for a salute. This is how you can take control, you don’t need to sit around and wait for it. It is not inevitable. First, research is showing that regular masturbation (more than five times per week) can cut the risk of prostate cancer. This is because regular ejaculation reduces the buildup of carcinogenic deposits in sperm, which can damage the lining of the prostate. Intercourse, frequent again (5 a week) will also have the same effect but will also have the benefit of making you more of a whipping pole for your mate. Good on you if you can convince her. Now this is when I get real. An enlarged prostate can uncomfortably be detected. If it is enlarged the doctor will send you for blood work. Chances are, he did already. It is a test called the PSA (ProstateSpecific Antigen) now; just because your PSA is elevated it does NOT mean you have Cancer. Most doctors will send you for a slice and dice test to verify cancer. I say to you now, many things should be considered first. Anti-biotic should be the first action taken. The prostate has small blood vessels already, and inflammation is a special problem for this organ, it constricts blood vessels and bronchial tubes, and drug treatment can take a bit of time. Second opinions are always a good thing. Do you really want someone taking a piece of you when it is infected? Remember, the plumbing does not usually work properly when you have surgery. A simple infection can raise your PSA. Steps to prevent or delay plumbing issues. First, the number one prevention would be to increase your testosterone. Weight bearing exercises is the best way to do this. A change of lifestyle is a more helpful cure and usually less painful. Decreasing Alcohol and caffeine seems to reduce the amount of burning sensations. Physical stress, sitting for prolonged periods and especially lack of sleep seem to make the inflammation worse. I have already stated previously, 5 a week is not just for kicks anymore. The Essential Fatty Acid Omega-3 reduces inflammation naturally, and more importantly Saw palmetto is a native of the southeast United States. The berries of the plant are used medicinally. It has properties that naturally target the prostate for prostate health.

3 Terminator - by Laura Grattan

England, World Cup ‘66 - by Laura Grattan


So how are we feeling today? - by Leanne Stiers I have returned with a vengeance. I realize it has been some time since my last article..I have been thinking about what to discuss...actually, I have had no time to post, so my apologies to all the members of RKYV. First and foremost, if you haven't read CS Cartier's article in the Guy's Corner, please do so. He has made some excellent points in his article and I bow to his knowledge. Thanks Cliff. You and I should talk more often... To my article.. Recently, a very good friend was diagnosed with severe clinical depression. This is not the everyday blues, or just having a bad day. This is major chemical changes in the brain that is causing her to not be able to rationalize everyday issues. Getting up, dressed and feeding herself has become a truly daunting task. She has no serotonin in her brain...that's the happy hormone released during times of pleasure...good food, good times, good sex...you get the picture. How do you fix it? Many ways...medications like Paxil and Celexa. Great drugs, but the side effects can be a killer. This is where CS' article comes in handy..vitamins. An increase of B vitamins, with a dose of magnesium is a great start in rebuilding the brain's health. Especially thiamine. Again eating right and exercise help proper oxygenation of the brain, allowing serotonin to be released much easier, and it just makes you feel better about yourself! Depression and other forms of mental illness are becoming much more prevalent in today's society. I can assure you..out of the 60 people I give meds to each day at my job...not all of them elderly, 43 are on an anti-depressant, anti-psychotic or tranquillizer of some sort. That seems drastic, but necessary. Ladies, after the birth of your children, did anyone suffer from post partum depression...or even just the baby blues? I sure did. After the birth of my son, I cried for weeks. The doctor told me it was hormonal and it would go away. It didn't. It took me months to convince him that the sadness I felt was simply overwhelming and I could not function well enough to take care of my child. I went on Paxil, for several months, and it helped. But the side effects were worse than an addict coming off his/her drug of choice cold turkey. The shaking, the dizziness and the vomiting were more than I could tolerate. I started a vitamin regimen and it worked. I will admit though, I have been lax in my vitamin taking this past two years or so. I plan to restart them. Consider it....everybody. I have said it before and I will say it again. See your doctor, regularly. You are the only one who knows your body and if there is something not right with it. Follow your instincts. Depression is treatable, and not only affects you, but the people who love you. Please, stay well. Don't forget, read from the Guy's Corner..If you didn't learn anything here, I promise, you'll learn from CS Cartier. In Health, Leanne Stiers

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Gallery Art

Another Barn - by Lee-Ann Marie MacDonald

Young Donald Trump - by Matthew Hatt

5 Bunny Girl - by Wiehahn Mundey

Untitled - by Fatma Adra


Untitled - by Fatma Adra

Agatha - by Ash Steel

UpSideDown - by Elza Von Zansen 6

Meme Swarm - by Marc Ngui


Soi Fong - by Wiehahn Mundey Monsters Do Exist - by Ash Steel

Albert Einstein - by Matthew Hatt 7 Self Portrait - by Stan Nelson


Untitled - by Ash Steel We Have a Calling - by Roy G. James

8 Evolve Your Information - by Marc Ngui

Nothing On My Mind - by Elza Von Zansen


Poetry Poems From The Gulf of Arabia - by Maha B.M. {July 31} Night Falls…. Night falls covering Earth in a blanket, Moon glancing over clouds, creeping, witnessing a Loner yearning for abode. Gentle man is he, eyes engulfed in tears, after wearisome pearl dives doth he wish; -to see beloved obedient wife with smile; -to see his new born infant son, fast growing. Angels cry along with the Rain for his state, Feet nailed to ship, yet heavenly heart soaring. Night falls upon a dreary sight, where Ocean has set a rampage. Lives tossed, cast out to shore; Body embraces home, yet soul lingers in Pain: travelling, searching, and forever wishing to return, yet, the living and the dead are not to meet not now -for he is to wait until Creator gives call and blessingTormented, gentle man is he to watch child grow, loving wife blinded by sorrow, yet smile iron cast. Son a spitting image of father, mother never know pain. Night falls covering Earth in a blanket, Moon glancing over clouds, creeping,

witnessing a Loner yearning for an abode, where a gentle as a man as he, wishing for mother. I be an ‘Arab’ My identity card holds my name ‘Osama’ is not on it for shame! My passport informs ‘occupation: student’ I didn’t cross out terrorist—I don’t do it! My religion is Islam, derived from Peace, Why jump me, and tie me to a leash? My features are Hispanic, dressings odd; Yet, you check for explosives in my I-pod. My tears are real, none of which are fake, yet you mock me, point, place on me a stake. ‘Jihad! Jihad’ are words that ring, in my mind, ‘revenge’ I wish to sing. My nationality be an Arab, wide and clear, But it is me, of you, I do truly cry and fear.

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Untitled - by Fatma Adra Dark Nude - by Elza Von Zansen


“…For Mine Adoration Is True” Love is not a fire on blaze, while Truth is a not star in glaze, nor Time a game on which to waste, for mine adoration is true. Eyes mirrors to soul’s content, Tongue speechless to Heaven sent, whilst Soul on a maddening spree went, for mine adoration is true. Solomon would have given up treasure, Kings their pleasure, And bird of Paradise their feathers, for mine adoration is true. Skies parade endless Rainbows, Angels cast down their halos, Hearts surrender their fellows, for mine adoration is true. Sun and Moon both into eclipse, Rain cry to touch lips, Clouds follow ‘til body rips, for mine adoration is true. I am You, hence You are I, two sides of coin no need to lie, a thin thread of red are souls doth tie, for mine adoration is true. Wisdom breathes your teaching, Morals your words been seeking, Soul out of tomb in men’s hearts are keeping, for mine adoration is true. Ocean were you whilst I timid river; Whirling emotions whilst I give shiver, You stab hearts, whilst I cant reach the liver, for mine adoration is true. Shams-e Tabriz-I lives long, Masnavi-ye Manavi holds its position up strong, Fihi Ma Fih and Majlis-I Sab’a philosophy unwrong, for mine adoration is true. Words to Books to Human created, Enticing heat dances unabated; Meetings of the mind to remain Fated, for mine adoration is true. Sanity cast swine to pearls, emotions astir with feelings in swirls, Heart to earthly belongings hurls, for mine adoration is true. Love is not a fire on blaze, while Truth is a not star in glaze, nor Time a game on which to waste, for mine adoration is true.

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Living in a Second Life - by Jillian Haldeman

Untitled - by Elza Von Zansen


Night of a Full Moon It flutter to my window, Every Night On Wings of Wind, with whispers of worship That is caressingly carried by Loving Lips-tightSealed with kisses, Sweet Morning Dew, a ship Slides across silk of blue, guided by Round Face, Where my eyes stroke, and Lips wish to Sip. Skin aches for the Long Awaiting Embrace, As creates of the night howl at Wondrous Veil, Each Fur on Stand, as all fours rest at pointed place. Angels seem to be at hiding, as Faeries’ Sail On clouds of Translucent Vapor do they do polite Holding cupid’s arrow, addressing Letter of Love they mail.

Message From The Heart; O' Heart Before cupid strikes his arrow Enriching with venomous love; an art. Make way for confessions—narrow. Youthful are they, from heart to heart. Vindictive is the world, until you came And after all things cruel, all was loved. Little did I knew are friendship was, but tame E’vry one knew that you had purpose from above. Night after night, my sleeplessness birthed insane That drove a hammer on to heart; fear of being robbed. I come to you, with bleeding muscle between hands N’ver before had I thought of taking this stance. Embrace me now, Engulfed with emotions, a blessing trance.

ZOE - by Wiehahn Mundey

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Untitled - by Ash Steel

Merry Go Round is Dead - by Elza Von Zansen


Meaningless Jibber Jabber - by Mandie Fortin {Aug 1} Darkness surrounds me as the night creeps in. Sneaking up behind me, beside me, above me. Coming closer. I look down to watch the earth swallow the sun, it's rays pouring over the clouds like a silent yet beautiful scream for help. Stars form little bursts of weak light, slowly filling the evening air. Silence is cracked by the last bird singing it's young to sleep, and the wind whispers a gentle good night to the trees, teasing the leaves with soft cool caresses. Your mind clears, thoughts of earlier run through your head like a motion picture you created yourself. There's the clouds that moved above you, shading you from the sun. The children playing in the park. The man picking up his son, holding him close and saying, 'I love you.' How wondrous life is. Filled with new days, new memories, new experiences to remember for days to come. I slip beneath the covers, and close my eyes. I'm lulled to sleep by the soft, rhythmic sounds that fill the room. My husband’s gentle breaths. I press my ear to his chest and find peace in the sound of the heart I love so dearly beating beneath his chest. If you listen closely, you can hear his love.

12 Sacred Heart of Jesus - by Roy G. James

Stop the Banditos - by Andy Richardson


Just Some Spinning Fools... - by R.J. PARE {Aug 25} So, back in my student days, some friends of mine had a band, an alt-rock-folk hybrid kinda thing... called themselves "the more"... well I recently discovered their NEW stuff under the NEW name The Spinning Fools. Which in turn inspired the following:

Just Some Spinning Fools.. the mOrE I listen to the Spinning Fools the mOrE I understand the mOrE growing, changing with the times music is a Journey with a mOrE evolved band the mOrE to sing some Fool praises Is what I came here for well mOrE or less I mean the mOrE my fond fogginess of memory makes what's gone seem mOrE

Untitled - by Andy Richardson

13 Elvis - by Mike Grattan

Beatles - by Mike Grattan


Long Fiction ...weeks ago... A dark dank alley, behind the infamous speakeasy, is where Vivian O’Hara finds herself seeking answers. She knew something was up. Danny may not have thought she’d noticed... but a soldier doesn’t just walk out on her solo... no sir-ree they don’t at that. Sometimes, the bouncers even have to ‘encourage’ them not to crowd up the stage. No, this was something else. Viv was hardly being arrogant, just realistic. She knew, as only a devastatingly beautiful woman can, the effect that she had on men. More likely this was one of her contacts. The O.S.S. they are calling it, a joint venture with the Brits.. A means of sharing intelligence {military intelligence... she stifles a laugh.. as if there was a such a thing}. The Governments of Great Britain and the good old USA had decided that it was time to start keeping tabs on Herr Hitler. It was about time as far as she was concerned, with her special ‘abilities’ she was sure she could find out all they needed to know about the little tyrant. “But then”, she thought, “ why not use one of the approved codes or signals?” It didn’t add up. But Vivian O’Hara was not one to leave things be. She was a forceful woman, and she would get her answers, she was certain of that. She wasn’t one to back away from any problem. Her old man, dumb putz that he was, would have gone to prison when the Feds busted one of Dutch Shultz warehouses, had Vivian not gone to bat for him. She used her powers of teleportation to get all the way into the director of the FBI’s office. Needless to say Hoover was impressed. After that it was pretty simple to swing a deal. Get her old man into a new identity and a clean slate... “Hopefully he won’t screw this one up..” she thought, disapprovingly. “Thank you for coming, Miss O’Hara” a voice in the shadows began. “I am pressed for time and needed to speak with you on an urgent matter of national security. “This is it then,” she smiled, “when do we leave for Europe?” The speaker stepped out of the shadows. As she had guessed it was the old soldier, a Sergeant by the rank visible now on his uniform, who was waiting for her. “I think you are mistaking me for one of Hoover’s lackeys, Miss...” the Sergeant coughed “No, I am here by direct request of the president.” “Ok fella,” she raised an eyebrow “ why don’t we start from the beginning. What, can I do for you?” “Miss O’Hara, Vivian if I may,” he paused “I have been instructed to convey you... and your gentleman friend, to a training facility, where you will be a part of a bold new type of fighting unit. The people in charge happen to think that the future lies with you and individuals like you... with powers and abilities beyond those of average men... er and women.” “Well now,” Vivian grinned, “this sir, changes everything now doesn’t it?” “No.” He gruffly replied. “What do you mean Sergeant?” asks Viv

14.


“It’s Devereaux, lady” he looks her in the eye, appraising her worthiness for such an ambitious task as has been given to him. “The truth is, it’s the world that’s changing... conventional methods just aren’t going to work against others of your kind.” “Others?” she was definitely intrigued now. “If we have people developing these abilities here.. Whose to say how many countries this is happening in?” “I dunno...” Viv begins to answer. “Exactly the point Miss! You don’t know, and if there is one lesson for us all to learn it is this... Either, we face the future and adapt...” he paused and let his word sink in. “Or...” she asked. “Or, we don’t face the future at all” he added “We get left behind as the future is determined for us, by others more willing and able to meet its challenges.” Sergeant Devereaux puts his thumbs inside his belt and proudly puffs out his chest. “Frankly Miss,” he adds “ .... not on my watch!”

Reservoir Dogs - by Mike Grattan

15 Clint - by Mike Grattan


Family Life My Journal - by Mandie Fortin {Aug 22} Last night was a beautiful night, the stars glittered in the sky as a gentle breeze played with the wind chimes hanging in the balcony doorway to my 4th floor apartment. I stepped out onto the concrete floor, closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I found myself tripping over my own feet after being startled by a rustling and fluttering inches from me. Jumping two feet in the air I backed up into the door looking toward the sound in time to watch a small dark shadow flop into the wall before attempting take off and slamming into the closed in balcony railing. I ran into my apartment laughing when I realized that it was a pigeon trying to find a quiet place to sleep for the night. Concerned about it's failed attempt at escape I stuck my head out the door. There it sat, hanging over the edge of the balcony peering back at me as if to be saying in it's own little bird language, "WTF woman?" I let out a little giggle and asked the beautiful black pigeon with white wings if it was okay. Slowly I made my way towards it as it swallowed it's heart back down out of it's throat and into it's chest where it belonged. I apologized to the little trespasser and watched as it finally gained enough composure to jump off the balcony and fly to a safe distance. But I swear I heard it laugh as it found the whole situation just as comical as I did. What I thought was funny was the fact that it flopped around into walls as I did into the door. It had to be funny watching me fall all over myself in fear over a small pigeon and I imagined it laughing at me calling me a chicken. All I have to say is, fear the pigeon, they wait patiently in the shadows for their victims. Then when you least expect it, they jump into large objects and take off. Enough to give you a heart attack or you die laughing.

Audrey - by Mike Grattan

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Jump - by Elza Von Zansen


Pop Culture Living in a Second Life {Reiko’s Column} - by Jillian Haldeman {Aug 27} Some days you just want to take a break from the real world, sit back relax on someone else's chair and become somebody else for a day. You may feel that a nice drink or two on somebody else's porch entails with a view of an island sunset... Or be it clothes shopping for eccentric clothing you wouldn't be caught dead in.. but secretly think you can get away with it. You never know what really entails in this.. it's all up to you what you make of it.. I'm Jill aka Reiko Fimicoloud (on Second LIFE) and I'll be pointing out the new and wondrous ways to become a whole new you for just a couple hours a day, and spend less than you do for a case of beer per week. Well, even better some days less than you spend on a pack of gum! (Cheaper than picking your nose even!)

Pin me - by Elza Von Zansen

[Reiko Fimicoloud is a simple young bratty 24 year old who tries to run a tee shirt shop, and has nothing better to do with her life but be a gopher at a church office, read to kindergarteners.. and play with Photoshop.] {Aug 29} While I'm writing this I'm listening to a remix of "if your going to San Francisco" .. The epitome of what seems this magazine is about, the old coffee and cigarettes theory of sitting around and sipping a good long black and sucking a few Marlboros down while you listen to good tunes and work up your next column about Harry met sally vs Alien and predator's babies. Well ok maybe not EXACTLY That.. but I come with you today with the first installment of my SECOND LIFE column. 17

Little Garden - by Ash Steel


Slackers CafÊ and Coffee house (http://slurl.com/secondlife/Djork/76/223/23) The epitome of cigarettes, beer, coffee and a good place to munch on your biscotti (burnt cookies for you layman’s term people), and a place to hear your tunes and read a few books. This place is modelled after many a coffee house in whatever this first life is we live in, and whatever D.J.s are still there rock the house hard. Unfortunately this is where I add, this place is dying -- I love it to death but when I came in and started D.J.ing last month it was on it's dying leg. But such a place like this shouldn't die, there's a whole SIM with this slackers place. DJORK. The ultimate DJORK. THE DORKIEST PLACE ON SL WITH ALL THE DORKIEST PEOPLE! There's an acid mushroom with a hookah inside, there's a roller rink , there's skee-ball, there's shops.. there's a massive pencil!

Kill Bill - by Laura Grattan

God you name it everyone thought of it... So if you wanna come by this place... the owners deserve your linden love, but if your broke ... just show them love by saying you like being a dork and your interested in helping make that place survive. So yea, be a Dork. Enjoy a cup of coffee in your second life... smoke a few Winston's and listen to some rock tunes.

18 Somewhere Over The Rainbow - by Elza Von Zansen

Sakura - by Wiehahn Mundey


Coffee and Cigarettes - by David Marshall {Aug 7} I'm a movie snob. Recently I was talking with some friends about a movie I had recently seen, Transformers if anybody really wants to know, and I had given them my brilliant editorial comment about it. Basically I said "meh". So one friend turned to another and said "Dave's a movie snob". Now this kinda bugged me as I don't like being referred to as a snob of any kind but it got me thinking. I expect a lot from a movie. I expect good directing, a good script, good casting, good editing, a good soundtrack, a good plot and above all I've got to be entertained; but in this day and age of the "let's remake all the movies that were successful" and "sequels to things that never needed a sequel" attitude coming out of Hollywood that's harder and harder to come by.

Deniro - by Mike Grattan

My wife and I had to really think of one good movie we'd seen this summer and we've seen a lot of them. When we finally tallied up the good movies we came up with a grand total of 1. Summertime used to be better than this, what the heck happened? Now don't get me wrong there has been some fun and action packed movies this summer, but I refuse to accept a movie that is 99% explosions and 1% plot. If I want a movie with no plot I'll watch porn, it's more satisfying. What really got me pondering the "snob" label was last night when we saw the highly-rated and critically loved "Bourne Ultimatum". Captain Jack - by Mike Grattan

Again I walked out and said "meh". 19


Was it really that bad? Or are my expectations impossible for big budget, summer blockbuster movies to reach? Now I'll be the first to admit my, and most people's, tastes in movies are very subjective things. What is "awesome" to one will be "meh" to another. I have enjoyed many movies this summer but none of them made me go "oh my god, you gotta go see this movie!" Does this mean my tastes are maturing? Or changing? Are movies I once enjoyed in my life now insufficient to satisfy my intellectual palate? I think the answer to all of these questions is yes. And yet there's still that part of me that continues to go to "lesser fare" in hopes of discovering an summer blockbuster gem.

Poison Ivy - by Wiehahn Mundey

So to Batman, Iron Man, Indiana Jones, The Hulk and Hellboy you've all got a tall order to fill next summer, or you too may be on the receiving end of a... "meh".

20 Rocky - by Mike Grattan


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