&BALANCE
GENDER EQUALITY
By TrinaMarie Shaw
Even though many men are facing job losses and conflicting demands, research says women do three times as much domestic work as men. That means women are more likely to be called on to look after children if businesses open while schools remain closed, handling online schooling, and possibly delaying their return to the paid labor force or putting their cape on being the superwoman with the intentions to handle it all. A major problem with having a “superwoman syndrome” will eventually experience burnout and the ideology has negative consequences on overall health and well-being. For me, it was during the pandemic when I found out that my husband is a wonderful cook. I was still working as an essential worker in real estate and during many cases, he rose to the occasion. I recently nominated him as one of the most magnificent men because in my eyes the man that is willing to help out at home as he would at work deserves a crown. A man that recognizes that he has more time on his hand and steps up to fulfill a role is a man worth honoring. I asked my husband a few personal questions about gender equality and here is what he had to say. TrinaMarie: Do you think there is gender inequality in today’s times? Rich: Yes, we still have a way to go. Women are still not treated equally in the workplace regarding pay or promotional and leadership opportunities. The women’s movement is good and hopefully, someday it will get better. In the home, women usually put more expectations on themselves to do the housework and men could help out more and there should be a conversation if that’s not the case. TrinaMarie: How do you recommend women communicate more and request help from their partner? Rich: If a woman works just as hard as her partner, there needs to be a conversation about creating more equal support in the home. You have to talk about it. Someone’s perspective of reality is different until you can have a discussion to work it out. What men understand can be completely different than what the woman expects; and vice versa. TrinaMarie: What issues do you think men face with juggling marriage and work- life balance? Rich: Men put a lot of stress on being the provider, head of the household, and provide security. When anything happens they feel like they are the ones that have to fix it. It’s a lot of pressure placed on men. It’s interesting how each gender places their expectations on themselves causing stress that can become overwhelming especially in partnerships and marriages. No wonder why during the pandemic and these uncertain times, domestic violence and divorce rates are increasing. My husband makes some great points. The reasons for the inequality in the homes are not entirely clear but may be tied to deep-seated societal views about what is expected of a wife and mother, reinforced by personal and peers’ expectations about themselves. Research indicates moms and or wives put housework ahead of their self-care and sleep because they feel personally accountable for providing a home for their families. Never let expectations, assumptions, or society tell you what each role should do. Both partners must communicate and come to an amicable agreement to share in responsibilities. Check out TrinaMarie’s blog or listen to her podcast on iTunes, Google Podcasts, Spotify, Anchor, and more to learn more about mental health and also what you can do to help eradicate the stigma.
TrinaMarie Shaw IG / FB: @beingtrinamarie Blog: BeingTrinaMarie.com
Podcast: Better Homes & Therapy @ anchor.fm/beingtrinamarie
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