The Life Gardener

Advance Praise For

The Life Gardener

“This beautiful book will teach you powerful lessons about living an authentic and happy life.”

–Martin Latulippe, CSP Bestselling Author & Speaker “The thing I like most about this book is that you can tell it is written from the heart. The simplest concepts are often the most difficult to master. I've also had the pleasure of being taken through Remi's journey musically, and that extremely rare combination makes the principles in this book resonate in a way I've never experienced before.”

–Kathy Mercure Freelance Writer “By utilizing his immense courage and sharing from his heart, Remi weaves a compelling tale of a young man and the many valuable lessons he learned and incorporated into his life along the way. An inspiring and easy to read story that will touch all who read it!”

–Bev Crossman Inspirationalist & Life Coach “All the best with the new album and sending your wonderful music and poetry out into the world. May all those who can be comforted and inspired by your gift find their way to your offerings.”

–Oriah Mountain Dreamer Bestselling Author

“In the book The Life Gardener, Remi has allowed himself to be vulnerable in order to share some of the incredible lessons that he learned through his own personal struggles. The lessons he shares in the book are applicable to anyone, regardless of where they are in their life journey. His story has made me reconsider the way I look at the difficulties in my own life. Easy to read and hard to put down, this book is a must read!”

–Jenn Marr Philanthropy Development Officer “If you're a person that needs to establish direction and better values in your life, this book is for you! It's a great example of simple principles that can be incorporated in anyone's life in order to live a happier and more balanced existence. Great read!”

–Steve Daniels Leadership Coach “The Life Gardener brings to the surface those burning 'Who am I and how do I find that out?' thoughts that we all so often have. Remi helps us find our unique answers with his heartbreaking, thought provoking novel about loss, love and most importantly… finding ones sense of self.”

–Natasha Carson Book Lover & Blogger “Remi is truly a creative artist as his down-to-earth writing style carries the reader along on this journey towards understanding and growth.”

–Trina Campbell Site Administrator for Miracle Messages “As a professional artist, I take my inspiration from the simplest things. The simple principles in this book are sure to inspire you in your own life.”

–Matt Leblanc Abstract Artist

THE

LIFE

GARDENER A Journey Towards Authenticity

Inspired by actual events

RĂŠmi Boudreau

Copyright © 2012 by Rémi Boudreau All rights reserved.

Copy Editor: Kathy Mercure Book Layout: Sandra Marquis Photographer: Nathalie Doucet Graphic Designer: Jocelyne Saulnier

Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication Boudreau, Rémi, 1979The life gardener : a journey towards authenticity inspired by actual events / Rémi Boudreau.

Issued also in electronic format.

ISBN 978-0-9879384-1-1 1. Boudreau, Rémi, 1979-. 2. Self-realization.

3. Identity (Psychology). 4. Individuality. I. Title.

BF697.B68 2012

158.1

C2012-901457-5

Printed and bound in Canada.

Published by: Rémi Boudreau 220 Magellan Drive Moncton, NB (Canada) E1A 7H3 506-381-6056 remiboudreau@gmail.com

www.RemiBoudreau.com

To Sandra and Zoé, This love that we share…

‘It’s All I Breathe’

ď‚— INTRODUCTION ď‚–

This book you are holding is a novel with a powerful message; one that I believe can help you with your own journey called life.

While the story itself is a work of fiction, it has been inspired by actual events that I have personally faced and overcome on my journey towards authenticity. While I feel I have made tremendous strides in overcoming some of the illusions and beliefs that had been the foundation for how I viewed the world and my role in it, I believe that my journey towards authenticity continues.

I believe we are all spiritual beings having a human experience. I also believe that life on earth is a school of some sorts, and that each and every one of us comes to this school with specific lessons we are meant to learn and to teach. What comes out of this cycle of learning and teaching is evolution.

While I believe authenticity to be the merging of spirit, mind and body, we still need to understand that we are, for the moment, living a human experience‌ an imperfect, sometimes challenging, but more often rewarding human experience. And for our experience to be less painful and more fulfilling, I believe we need to be more patient with ourselves and with others.

As you read the story that follows, I ask that you give yourself permission to open up to the possibilities of what your life could be. Try to see past any illusions or beliefs that may be currently limiting your experience and joy. Life has many seasons, and sometimes we can be stuck in one by fear of what could be coming next – I know I was. But by trying to prevent change, not only are we preventing this learning and teaching from taking place, we are also putting all of our energy and efforts trying to prevent something that is simply destined to happen – our own history proves it. Although scary at times, change is truly a positive thing.

I wish to thank every single person that has been a part of my journey thus far. However long or brief, joyful or challenging, loving or hurtful, our time together has helped shape my current reality – and for that I am forever grateful.

Life is a blessing we are all meant to enjoy.

With love,

Rémi 

“Everybody is a genius.

But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”

– Albert Einstein

 PROLOGUE 

Sitting alone on this wooden bench – surrounded by a landscape so beautiful, one might believe they’re in a dream – I find myself staring at this sign still strategically located between the corner of the garden and the beautiful gravel pathway.

HELP WANTED It was a little over three years ago, sitting on this same bench, that I looked at this sign and unknowingly embarked on a new journey for myself – the next chapter in this thing called life. And as I read those carefully engraved words once more today, it came to me… the reason I was so attracted to those words back then was because, somewhere inside of me, those words represented a personal cry for help.

YEAR 1 The Groundwork

 CHAPTER 1 

Walking around this beautiful property one last time, I still couldn’t believe how my entire world – everything I knew – could somehow have come crumbling down within the span of only a few weeks.

Not so long ago, I felt I was on top of the world. I was the owner of a large painting company with fifteen employees. I was married to a wonderful and successful woman. And to top it all off, we were only months away from having our first child. But life doesn’t always turn out the way you expect it.

I walked to my car and said my final goodbyes to this place that had been our home for four years. Driving away, with the image of a past life shrinking in my rearview mirror, I now found myself with nothing more than a few dollars in my pocket, this car, and a pen with the name of our realtor written on it in gold.

On my way to my new place – which my overly optimistic landlord referred to as “cozy” – I decided to stop for coffee at my favorite spot. I parked at the curb and as I opened my door, I could already smell the wonderful scent of fresh ground coffee.

The coffee shop was situated on the ground level of an old brick building across the street from the city’s largest park. The outside of the shop had been redone in wood and was painted

THE LIFE GARDENER green. The name of the coffee shop – Park Street Café – was engraved over the main door and painted in gold. Inside, the menus were hand written on a number of different-sized chalkboards. This attention to detail gave me the impression that the owner of this place must really care. In the main sitting area, a somewhat magical ceiling arched over a number of tables, sofas and chairs. The details in its architecture made it obvious that it was the original ceiling of the building. “No one takes the time to give buildings this much character and details these days,” I thought.

I ordered my usual cinnamon-sprinkled cappuccino to go and finally made my way to my new home after a very long day.

Once I arrived at my apartment, only a few blocks away from the coffee shop, I unpacked the remaining boxes from my car and made my way to the bedroom. It was only about four in the afternoon, but my body felt as if I had been running a marathon all day. Grocery shopping for the new apartment, packing the remainder of my belongings from my old house and signing the closing papers with the lawyers – it somehow had been much more difficult and energy consuming then I would have expected. As I laid my head to rest on the pillow, exhaustion overcame me and I immediately fell asleep.

When I woke up later that evening, realization hit me: this was my new life – unemployed and living alone in this tiny apartment. The thought of eating didn’t enter my mind and instead I spent the entire night in my bedroom going over and over the events that led to my current reality.

I understood why I came to have no other options but to close and bankrupt my business after all those years, but the details that surrounded our pending divorce and now terminated pregnancy still haunted me every night. How could I even begin to forgive myself?

The following morning, I decided to go for a walk at the park to clear my head so that I could figure out what to do with

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK my life – and what to do for money. Victoria Park was impressive, occupying the equivalent of twenty city blocks. Its incredible scenery featured many gravel walkways, tall old trees, several gardens and in the very middle, a twenty-foot wide fountain where all of the walkways met.

After walking around for about twenty minutes, I decided to sit on a wooden bench across from one of the gardens.

Sitting there, I wondered, “What am I supposed to do with my life now; how will I earn money and pay for rent, groceries and gas?” Then as if out of my control, I turned my head towards the right and noticed a beautiful hand carved sign. Somehow I couldn’t pull my eyes away; as if magnetically pulled to it, I kept staring at those two words for what felt like several minutes. “Help Wanted” read the sign.

Finally I stood up to look at the sign more closely. On the back of it I noticed a handwritten card inside a tightly sealed plastic container.

Flowers need help to flourish.

Meet me here Monday at 8 a.m.

– Mr. Misaki “What is this?” I thought, “Is Mr. Misaki the person in charge of the maintenance for the park? If he is, couldn’t he have been a bit clearer about what this card means? Is this a job posting, volunteer work, or a prank?”

After a few seconds standing there, I slid the card into my pocket and continued on with the rest of my Saturday.

 CHAPTER 2 

I’m not sure if it was my curiosity that convinced me to get up that Monday morning or a desperate need for money, but somehow I found myself standing near the sign waiting to see if this had been a complete waste of time.

At eight o’clock sharp, I saw a man walking towards me.

He was short, not even five feet tall, appeared to be Japanese and had white hair that covered only the sides of his balding head. At first glance he appeared to be in his late sixties or early seventies, but the more I paid attention to the way he moved, I wondered if he could be in his late forties or early fifties. “Good morning young man,” said the stranger as he continued to walk in my direction. “My name is Mr. Misaki and I’m the gardener for this lovely park. What’s your name?”

“Huh… my name is Dave, sir,” I replied, still trying to figure out how old this man was.

“I would presume that the reason why you are here is because you found my little note,” he replied with a kindness in his voice I had rarely heard before.

“Well… huh… yeah, although, I’m not really sure what the note was for exactly, sir. Is this a job interview?”

“Not a job interview, but a job offer. I am here to see if you would care to help me look after the gardens for the summer.

And please, call me Mr. Misaki.”

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK “Oh, sorry, Mr. Misaki. But how can you offer me a job before knowing if I have the experience required? Don’t you need my resume?”

“You will experience gardening this summer working alongside me and others just like you if you accept this employment. And whatever your resume says you did in your past does not really concern me.”

“Well, then I guess, my answer is yes. I will work with you for the summer,” I said with a hint of excitement in my voice.

“When do I start?”

“How about now?” he replied.

“Ok… so, what do you need me to do?”

“For today, you can help me prepare this garden for the new season. How about if we find some tools and get to work?” said Mr. Misaki.

And so we did. We spent the entire day working in the same garden, removing the dead leaves and flowers that had spent the winter covered with snow. We removed weeds that had crept into this space. We raked the leaves that had fallen from the surrounding trees. We added fertilizer and watered the soil.

At the end of the day, Mr. Misaki explained to me that I would be working alone for the rest of the week doing the same thing we had done today but in other gardens. He asked me to follow him as we brought our tools inside the small maintenance building, which could more accurately be described as a small shed. Then he continued to show me exactly which gardens I was to prepare as part of my weeklong assignment.

After handing me a key to the maintenance building, we said our goodbyes and made plans to meet again the following Monday at the same spot we had met this morning. I was extremely surprised that after only one day of working with him, he would trust me enough to have me work alone in the other gardens. I can’t say that I was filled with confidence, but

THE LIFE GARDENER I do know that this was exactly the kind of challenge I needed to keep myself distracted from the fact that at age thirty, I was now living alone in a tiny apartment and trying to make a living working for a little over minimum wage. My parents must be so proud.

 CHAPTER 3 

On Monday morning if found myself sitting on that same bench waiting for Mr. Misaki to show. I hadn’t seen him all week but wondered if perhaps he had looked at my work to see if I had done it correctly. “He must have,” I thought.

“Good morning Dave, how was your weekend?” said Mr. Misaki as he approached.

“Fine Mr. Misaki and yours?”

“Fantastic Dave! So tell me, are you ready to learn something new today?”

“Sure Mr. Misaki, but I wanted to ask you, did you look over my work from last week? Did I prepare the flower beds properly?”

“I can’t say that I did, and only time will tell if you did.

Besides, what’s really important for today is the next step in your gardening experience. So how about we get to it?” he said.

And so we did. Still having a hard time understanding why he didn’t want to check on my work, I followed Mr. Misaki towards the maintenance building where we removed a large box filled with a variety of seeds and made our way back to the garden.

“Today, we’ll be planting some seeds,” said Mr. Misaki as we walked back towards the garden. “You see, most of the area inside the garden is already planted with perennials, which

THE LIFE GARDENER grow back season after season. But I also like to plant annuals, which only grow for one season. This way I can create a different look each year and make the gardens new and refreshing for everyone to enjoy.”

Mr. Misaki began to show me all the different types of seeds he had in his box. He explained how each would grow to display different colors, scents and textures and how each would come into bloom at different time of the season. I could tell he knew a lot about flowers and his passion for them was clearly visible.

Watching Mr. Misaki perform his work was really something else. He punctured the soil and planted the seeds in the same way an artist would perform his art. For most of the day, I simply watched him while handing him whatever seed he requested.

To my surprise, it took all day for Mr. Misaki to plant the seeds for that single garden. But he had also told me earlier that afternoon, “Art is not created by rushing or stressing over time.” His reference to art did surprise me, but the way he performed his work certainly convinced me that he considered himself an artist.

On our way back towards the maintenance building, Mr. Misaki said I was to plant the seeds as we had done today in the gardens I had prepared last week.

“But I don’t know which ones will look nice together or how many to plant, Mr. Misaki” I responded, a bit panicked.

“I don’t expect you to know this; I simply want you to feel it.

Try to express yourself in your work this week,” he told me as he closed and locked the door. “And meet me here at the maintenance building next Monday at eight.”

The next morning, I started working on the first garden, but as time passed I could tell that it wasn’t going to take me all day to finish planting it. Then I thought back to how Mr. Misaki carefully took his time between each seed, often speaking to them and asking them to grow tall and strong. I

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK remember looking around to make sure no one was watching us when he did. How embarrassing would that have been if someone had seen us? I mean who talks to flowers, let alone seeds?

I slowed my pace, even though it felt like I was wasting my time. But I couldn’t bring myself to actually ask the seeds to grow tall and strong.

 CHAPTER 4 

The following Monday, I arrived at the maintenance building, but quickly realized that I wasn’t the only one waiting for Mr. Misaki. There were already two others waiting and I could see a third person, a woman that somehow seemed familiar to me, walking towards us. “Is she coming here?” I wondered, hoping that she would.

“Good morning everyone,” she said, as she turned onto the small gravel pathway that lead to us. And as she did, I realized why she looked so familiar. I had seen this girl before a few times at the coffee shop. “Good morning,” the others responded, as I continued to stare at her.

There was something about this girl that was intriguing.

She exuded a special kind of beauty – not the kind you would see in magazines, but the kind of simple beauty that seemed to come from within. I just couldn’t stop looking at her eyes and her angelic face.

“Hey there,” I finally managed to get out.

“My name is Maria, what’s your name?” she asked, looking in my direction.

“I’m Dave,” I answered.

Then from my right I heard, “I’m Stephanie.”

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK “And I’m John. I guess we’re all here waiting for Mr. Misaki,” he said as we gathered together and started to talk about our past weeks.

At eight sharp, Mr. Misaki joined us, with coffee and muffins in hand. We formally introduced ourselves to each other and it was a great way to meet the team that we learned we’d be working with for the summer. We spent the first hour of the day sharing stories and eventually got around to work.

Our first assignment was to walk around and see the individual work each of us had been doing over the past two weeks.

Mr. Misaki revealed to us that he had had each of us working in separate sections of the park for those first two weeks, but that we would now be working as a team, looking after the gardens for the entire park.

During the week that followed we all worked together as Mr. Misaki explained to us how each type of flower had specific needs to help it grow. “Some need more water, some need more sun, and learning the individual needs of each seed and flower is key to becoming a great gardener.”

“Do we have to remember all of this for the final exam?” I asked sarcastically. The comment generated a few laughs and I could tell, from looking at the expressions on the faces of the others that we were all thinking the same thing – none of us were trying to become professional gardeners.

ď‚— CHAPTER 5 ď‚–

It was now early June. It had been a little over a month since I had begun working with Mr. Misaki and the others. The past few weeks had had their ups and downs, both at work and in my life in general. I was still waiting to hear from my ex-wife to finalize our separation agreement. Since we had already divided all of our belongings and sold our house, it was only a question of having our lawyers draft the final papers and sign.

It sounded easy enough, but for some reason things seemed to take much more time than it should, at least in my opinion.

There was also a lot of paperwork that needed to be filed and signed to officially close down my old business. Rentals were returned to the dealerships, other assets were turned over to the trustee who then sold them to recover a small portion of the total debt that had been left from the last six years of operating at a loss.

At work we discovered that not all of the seeds we had planted showed signs of life. It surprised me how Mr. Misaki approached situations like these. The truth was that the four of us had made many mistakes – overwatering in certain areas, forgetting to add fertilizer in others, and many more. To my surprise, when this happened Mr. Misaki would bring us together, discuss what the problem was, how we could have done things differently, and then instruct us to start over by

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK replanting new seeds. Although, I appreciated the fact that he didn’t make us feel any worse than we already did, the perfectionist side of me felt like I somehow should have known better. Like I could have prevented those mistakes and make all of those seeds grow “tall and strong” on my first try.

While the last few weeks had sometimes been difficult for me, the highlight was certainly Maria. Often, I had found myself working alongside her and we’d exchanged a few stories and laughs. I really liked Maria, and finally I decided that I would ask her out – today.

It was later in the afternoon when I was finally able to gather enough courage to speak those scary words – would you like to go out for coffee one night this week, Maria? I kept going over different responses she might give me. In some scenarios she laughed out loud at me, in others, she would simply turn around and continue working, ignoring me. But to my surprise, her actual response was one that I had somehow never really considered, “Absolutely Dave! Actually, I have been trying to find the courage to ask you for a few days now.”

And as easy as that, we made plans to meet at the coffee shop that evening at seven.

 CHAPTER 6 

I couldn’t remember the last time I felt so nervous. I paced around my small dining room table for about an hour; I tried on five or more different shirts; I brushed my teeth at least three or four times and I even considered wearing cologne for the first time in my life, but thankfully decided otherwise.

I arrived at the coffee shop fifteen minutes early, and to my surprise, I found she had done the same.

“Hi Maria, you look amazing,” I said as I approached the table where she was sitting.

“Thanks Dave, so do you. It’s nice to be together without our hands and knees in dirt!”

She stood up, we hugged, and then I asked her what she wanted to drink. “I’ll have a vanilla latte.” she said as I made my way to the counter. I very much appreciated that she didn’t fight me on my offer to pay. My male ego would have had a hard time not being allowed to treat her to coffee. After all, I was the one who had asked her out.

For a while we spoke about the typical “date topics” like where we’re from, our family, and other small talk but as the night progressed, we started to really get into the good stuff.

“So about a month after your daughter Amanda was born, your boyfriend came to you and said he wanted to break up

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK and today you’re okay with that?” I asked after she explained the details that lead to my question.

“Well, certainly not at first. But as time went by I realized that his decision to leave me was truly based on love, and not on fear,” she said as she lifted her head to look straight into my eyes.

“But it’s only been six months; how can you already be thinking his leaving was a good thing?” I quickly asked.

“I think it was in a book I read about a month after he approached me. The book said most people settle in life because the alternative is too scary. But the sad thing is that when this happens, their happiness becomes nothing more than a distant dream. My boyfriend and I weren’t the greatest match from the beginning, but we needed each other at the time. And we certainly did not plan on having children anytime soon, but the Universe made it so that we did. After reading that book, I understood that while it would have been much easier for him to settle and stay with me, he eventually would have resented me and that would have created a lot of tension in our home. But instead, he risked being seen as a terrible father and boyfriend and made the decision he felt would be the best for all of us, and broke up with me. But he made it clear that he wanted to stay in Amanda’s life. While as a couple we were going to break up, both of us would remain Amanda’s parents in loving, but separate homes.”

I sat there, shocked by the wisdom of this twenty-five year-old woman. For a moment I felt like I might cry as thoughts of Vincent came to my mind. Vincent was the name our little boy had owned for the better part of the 24 weeks he lived in his mother’s womb. But there was no way I could ever share this story with Maria, not yet anyway. If she had been able to find peace with the events she’d lived through this past winter, I most certainly hadn’t.

“This is really an incredible story Maria. Can I just say how amazing I think you are?” I said.

THE LIFE GARDENER She smiled at me and we remained silent for a few seconds. “So tell me more about your winter and the changes you mentioned you had gone through,” she said to me with a look that told me she really wanted me to be honest. I hesitated for a bit, debating whether or not to reveal to her how I thought I would have been a father by now. But instead, I decided to share the story of my business and the events that lead to its final days.

“Well, a few months ago, I was the owner of a large painting company and had fifteen people working for me. And although from the outside, this company appeared to be the most successful in the industry, we had been losing money for over six years.”

“Why, what happened?” she asked as she inched her chair closer to me.

“Well, six years ago a customer of mine had just sold her house and was moving in another city two hours away. She asked me if we could paint this new house of hers, but she only had a few days available for painting before her furniture was schedule to arrive. She asked me if I could give her the price to do this work by using pictures of the rooms and a floor plan of the house. I said, that usually I preferred to see the house before I give a price, but in this case I would make an exception.

So I gave her a price and she accepted it. But the job was nothing like we had expected. At the last minute, she decided to change all of the trims and door from a water-based paint to an oil-based paint, which takes about eight times longer to dry than water-based paint. She also asked if we could paint her kitchen cupboards, which were varnished. And yet, she insisted that the work be finished by the end of the weekend.

We tried our best, working sixteen hours a day, but the work wasn’t finished on time and we had to come back the following weekend which meant another two-hour drive for me and my crew. When Sunday evening came around, we were finally

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK done, the trucks were packed and we were ready to leave. But as I walked inside to see my customer to collect payment, she asked if I could go with her to see something in the kitchen. I followed her in, wondering what she wanted to show me.

When we got there, she took her fingernail and started to scratch the paint off her kitchen cupboards. Then she did the same thing on a doorframe and door. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing! She said that she didn’t know what had happened but she wasn’t going to pay me until this problem was resolved. Of course, I said to her I would look into it and drove back home empty-handed.”

“Wow,” said Maria, “what happened after that?”

“Well after a lot of research, talking to various specialists, and driving back and forth to her home to do some tests, we finally concluded that there had to be some kind of cleaning detergent residue on the surface of those cupboards, trims and doors – probably from the previous home owners cleaning the house before showing it to potential buyers. Paint does not stick very well in that case. Part of me wanted to blame the previous owners or even my customer for rushing us, but at the end of the day I was the one that should have insisted that the timeline she allowed simply didn’t give us enough time for all the work she requested. I should have been more focused on a quality result and not so much on fast service.”

I paused for a few seconds, reliving the pain and stress that I felt at that time, and then continued.

“We ended up spending a total of about three months travelling back and forth to fix the problems on this job. And the worst thing was that this was happening right in the middle of our busy fall season. We must have lost at least thirty thousand dollars in revenue. Plus, the job ended up costing my company a little over twenty thousand dollars. We only received four thousand dollars in payment from the customer.

The original invoice was around eight thousand, but she said the last few months of having us in her house most days of the

THE LIFE GARDENER week had been a great deal of trouble for her and that it wasn’t up to her to pay for our mistakes. And she was right.”

“So that’s like fifty thousand dollars that you lost in a matter of only a few months,” said Maria.

“Yes, unfortunately. But shortly after that I remember telling myself that I would no longer let my lack of confidence and knowledge control my fate as it did in that situation. So I started to read everything I could about the painting industry.

And within a few years, I got my official Red Seal Certificate, which meant I had the necessary knowledge and experience to work in this industry anywhere in Canada. It isn’t necessary to have a Red Seal designation for painters to work in this trade in this province, but I felt proud to be able to tell my customers that even though it wasn’t necessary, I did go through the steps required to be certified.”

“So how did you manage to keep the business running during those six years?”

“Credit cards and lines of credit. I’m still confused whether this was a good thing or not, but I did have access to a lot of credit at the time. But this past winter, the money that was required to continue running this business far exceeded the money I had at my disposal. So I had to close the doors.

The funny thing is that for the past few years I had wanted a change in my life, but always felt like my business had me caged in like a prisoner.”

“Well Dave, I tell you, that was really an incredible story.

And can I say how amazing I think you are?” Maria said with a friendly smile on her face.

 CHAPTER 7 

Towards the middle of July, after the gardens were really starting to display their full beauty, I asked Mr. Misaki if he had any books on gardening I could borrow. I found myself spending most of my evenings at the coffee shop sitting outside on the summer terrace with my cappuccino and gardening books. I had always been the type of person that dives into whatever new topic sparked my interest. I developed the same kind of commitment to learn everything I could about gardening – just as I had with billiards, music and painting at earlier times in my life.

I couldn’t believe how many different types of flowers there were – so many colors and so many textures – each blossoming at different times in the season, for different lengths of time. As I was reading these books I really started to understand why it was that Mr. Misaki considered creating a garden to be a form of art.

“Mr. Misaki,” I called as I ran towards him the following morning. “Gardening really is a form of art, I understand this now”.

Mr. Misaki slowly stood up from where he was working and turned towards me. “Ah, yes Dave,” he said, looking at me as a proud parent after witnessing his child ride a bicycle alone for the first time.

THE LIFE GARDENER “As much as we can appreciate the beauty of a single flower, it is nothing when compared to the splendor of a beautiful garden. It would appear that its beauty does not come from the sum of each individual flower, but rather from the original composition and interplay of the textures, shapes and colors that makes up this beautiful piece of art.”

“Mr. Misaki, that is just… it’s… well, that thought is a piece of art in itself!”

“Life is a piece of art, but only a few choose to hold their own brush.”

“Wow Mr. Misaki, you’re on a roll,” I said, still amazed at the beauty of those poetic sentences. “Would it be okay if I worked with you today?”

“Certainly Dave,” he said, as he signaled for me to join him.

That day, I came to appreciate and respect Mr. Misaki so much more. He shared with me that he had moved to Canada from Japan twelve years earlier and had been responsible for the gardens in this beautiful park since his arrival. He even explained to me the meaning of his name, Misaki, which means, “Beautiful Blossom.” It was only natural that he would grow to become a gardener it seemed.

I also shared the story of my business and the financial troubles that had led to its closure.

“What did you love most about painting?” he asked as I finished my story.

The question surprised me and I took a few seconds to think about it.

“I suppose, what I really enjoyed most, was the look on my clients’ faces when they would come back home and see their entire house filled with new colors,” I finally said. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized how true it was. “It was so rewarding to see them make plans for their future as they shared their vision for their new home with me. I really miss it Mr. Misaki.”

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK I also explained to Mr. Misaki the challenges of trying to coordinate jobs and to please every customer when dealing with construction and weather delays.

“We can’t work outside when it rains, we can’t work in the new homes when there are delays, and we really need to make sure we show up on time for the repaint jobs since people have moved their furniture in expectation of our arrival. When you throw in the fact that you also need to keep your workers happy, the whole thing left me worrying like crazy all the time,” I explained with a hint of frustration.

“The repaints… I assume by this you are referring to the people who get their current home repainted?” asked Mr. Misaki. This gave me the impression that he truly wanted to learn more about my industry – well, my past industry.

“Yes, well any interior space that has already been painted and which the owners want the colors to be changed. Those are the jobs that gave me the most satisfaction.”

“So tell me Dave, why is it that you bothered with the other jobs if you didn’t enjoy them as much?”

“Well, I don’t think I could have made enough money by only accepting interior repaint jobs.”

“Did you ever try?” he asked, looking to see my reaction.

The question was so simple, yet I never really gave it a serious consideration. But how could I? Yes, I loved interior repaint jobs, but in my previous business these types of jobs only kept two or three of my painters busy. The rest of my crew worked on new constructions and exterior jobs. To make more money, I need to grow the business, was my strategy, as I attempted to pay off my fifty thousand dollar mistake.

I was silent for a few seconds thinking about how to give Mr. Misaki a smart comeback, but I couldn’t find one.

 CHAPTER 8 

It had been a few weeks since Maria and I started to see each other and things were really going great. Sometimes, when it was her week with her daughter, Amanda, we’d go for strolls in the park together or stay in for movie night. For the first time in my life, I got to experience what life might be like as a father… and it felt great! But some nights, I would have a hard time sleeping, still feeling robbed that it wasn’t my own child that I got to play with that day.

Weeks had gone by, since the day I had spent with Mr. Misaki and the wonderful discussions we had. His question still lingered in the back of my mind, “Did you ever try?”

Going over my reasoning for never trying repainting jobs only, I realized that money had been the biggest reason not to in the past. I didn’t think I could pay off all of my debts with only a few painters working for me. Of course, most of those debts were gone now that I had closed my business. If there was ever a time to find out if offering only interior repaint services might work, it was now.

Having completely changed my lifestyle, I was now able to make ends meet by earning only a little more than minimum wage. In the past I had gone out to eat at least three or four times a week with my ex-wife. We’d taken expensive vacations a few times a year. We never really looked at the price tag

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK when we stumbled upon something we felt compelled to own.

And this had become our way of life. “Nothing wrong with that kind of lifestyle,” I thought, “when you have the money to afford it.”

But now that I didn’t need as much money to pursue my new lifestyle, perhaps I would give this new idea a try. I did a few calculations and realized that I only needed a few hundred dollars to get started. I could send a letter to my previous customers to try to generate a few jobs for the fall. To start, I’d only need to hire part-time help until I knew for sure whether this idea would work or not.

Around the middle of September I sent letters to my old clients. About a week later, after arriving home from work I got my first call. We made plans to meet the following night for a quote and she gave me the job that same night. We scheduled the work for the first week of October. I couldn’t believe how excited I was and how much I looked forward to painting myself. I hadn’t held a paintbrush or roller in years because I was too busy managing the operations of my old business. “I’ll be holding the paint brush,” I said to myself silently. Was this only a coincidence, or did this relate to what Mr. Misaki had said?

 CHAPTER 9 

Fall was here and most of the flowers were starting to show signs that the season was coming to its end. It was nearing the end of the day when out of nowhere I heard “Dave, do you have a few minutes to spare? I would like to talk with you.”

“Where did he come from,” I thought to myself. Had I been concentrating so deeply on my work I hadn’t seen or heard him approach, or did he somehow float his way near me?

“Sure Mr. Misaki.”

“Come, let’s sit over here.”

I followed him to that same bench I had been sitting on the day we first met.

“Dave,” he said, “Over the summer, you have grown into a really good gardener.”

“Thanks Mr. Misaki. That really means a lot coming from you.”

“But unfortunately, the end of the season also means the end of this job until next spring. This will be our last day of work for this season.”

“I understand Mr. Misaki and I was expecting it. But guess what?”

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK I began to explain to him my plans to start a painting company and how I already had a job lined up and three estimates scheduled for the weekend.

“Marvelous Dave. I’m truly happy for you!” Mr. Misaki exclaimed, putting his hand on my shoulder and looking at me with tremendous pride.

“Now Dave, I have a question for you: what two gardening principles have you learned this summer?”

“What? Mr. Misaki, I thought we were kidding about the final exam.”

“Oh this is no final exam Dave; this is just you and me talking about this past summer.”

“Well I know that I really sucked at gardening at the beginning and that now I’m much better.”

I could tell that Mr. Misaki had something on his mind.

He was silent for a few seconds before finally saying, “Let me share with you what I believe to be the two most important principles in gardening and in life.”

I was about the interrupt him to ask about the “life” part but Mr. Misaki continued, “The first principle is, ‘the gardener is one hundred percent responsible for his garden.’”

The gardener is 100% responsible for his garden.

Seeing the puzzled look on my face he said, “Dave, do you remember at the start of the season how some areas of the garden had to be replanted?”

“Of course, Mr. Misaki, but that was not your fault, we were the ones who made mistakes.”

“Yes, those areas needed to be replanted because of some mistakes the four of you made, but I delegated that work to you, knowing that you weren’t experienced gardeners. Had I become angry with you, would that have made the flowers come back to life?” he asked, waiting for an answer.

“Of course not.”

THE LIFE GARDENER “So what would have been the benefit of me becoming angry or blaming you? Either way, I still had to teach you how to prevent this in the future and we still needed to replant the area, right?”

“I suppose…”

A moment of silence followed and then he continued.

“And the second most important principle is ‘the more the gardener knows about the seed, the easier it is to help it grow.’”

The more the gardener knows about the seed, the easier it is to help it grow.

“Well now, this one I get, Mr. Misaki. It certainly became much easier for me to help the seeds grow once I understood that the needs for each were very different from the other,” I proudly told Mr. Misaki.

“That’s right Dave. Now let me ask you this question, would it have been possible for you to learn about each seed’s individual needs had you not known which ones you planted in the first place?

“Well I suppose, but it would have involved a lot more time and a lot more mistakes.”

“That’s right,” said Mr. Misaki. “You see, Dave, the gardening books you read over the summer and the knowledge I shared with you were the result of many errors that have been made, noted, discussed and passed along from one gardener to the next; each gardener adding to this knowledge.”

“Interesting,” I said, waiting for him to continue.

“Let me ask you this Dave, how can you apply these two principles in your life?”

“I’m not sure what you’re getting at Mr. Misaki. How can you compare gardening to life?”

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK “Think about it this way Dave. ‘Your soul is the seed. Your body is the flower. Your life is the garden. You are the gardener.’”

Your soul is the seed.

Your body is the flower.

Your life is the garden.

You are the gardener.

I stared at him, trying to make sense of what I had just heard. How can he compare my life to a garden? I wanted to ask him but all I could do is stare.

“You see Dave, just as I experienced at the start of the season with the gardens, certain events or the actions of other people may bring about circumstances that force you to have to start over in certain aspects of your life. You can choose to be angry at the world, curse others, or blame it on bad luck, but this will not magically make things better for you, or change what has happened.”

“I think I understand what you mean,” I was finally able to say. “But this is some really deep stuff Mr. Misaki, and certainly not easy to hear.”

“You are right Dave; most people find comfort in blaming outside circumstances for their unhappy situations. Hearing that they are in full control of their reactions to any of life’s events, might only add insult to injury. That’s why this kind of knowledge can only be shared with people who are ready to hear it.”

“But how do we know who to share this knowledge with, Mr. Misaki?”

“The question you are asking is the wrong one, my dear friend. The question should be ‘When will I be ready to learn this?’ There is a saying by Buddha that my father passed onto

THE LIFE GARDENER me, as his father passed it onto him: ‘When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”’

“Wow, this is really nice, Mr. Misaki. So does this mean that I’m ready?”

“Only you can accurately answer that question, but it certainly would appear to be so.”

“Now if we look at the second principle,” Mr. Misaki continued after a brief moment of silence, “you already know how it helped you grow the seeds more effectively once you knew more about their individual needs. But can you relate this information to your life?”

“I’m not sure, Mr. Misaki. Do you mean that I need to get to know myself better?”

“Precisely! Now how did you get to learn more about the seeds this summer?”

“Well I made mistakes, you showed us what we did wrong and how to avoid making the same mistakes and, I read books about gardening and you shared some of your knowledge with me.”

“You’re really making my job easy, Dave. That’s exactly right! Now do you see how this could be applied to your life?”

I thought about his question once more and the connection started to come to me.

“Learn from my mistakes, read books and talk to people who know more about me than I do,” I said, knowing that Mr. Misaki would understand that the last part was meant as a joke.

He smiled and then continued. “Learning from your mistakes, yes, but how do you know when you have made a mistake?”

“Well I suppose if I don’t like the outcome.”

“And how do you know whether you like the outcome or not?”

“By the way I feel; if I’m happy or not about it.”

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK “Excellent Dave! Now, the remainder of your answer was partially correct. But an important difference we need to remember is that each person is uniquely different. You see Dave; all flowers can be categorized into groups and each individual flower that falls into a particular group will share the same specific needs in order to fully develop. Do you understand what I’m saying, Dave?”

“Absolutely,” I answered as I nodded for him to continue.

“Now, when trying to relate this concept to our lives, a key difference to note is that each of us is unique and therefore we all have very different needs to help us fully develop. There are roughly seven billion uniquely different human beings currently living on this earth. It’s true we can be divided into groups based on our sex, our jobs, our religion, our age, our marital status, and even our interests. But by assuming, like we so often do, that the needs of each person in a particular group are the same, it only prevents us, as well as others, from revealing our true beauty to the world.”

Mr. Misaki paused for a moment and then continued.

“Every single one of us has a specific reason for being here and it is our purpose to discover what it is. Unfortunately, very few of us are ever able to achieve this.”

“Why is that?” I asked.

“You see, Dave, when we first make our way into this world, most of us create a wonderful relationship with our parents which balances learning and teaching.”

“How do we teach our parents, Mr. Misaki?” I asked, unsure of what he meant.

“The only way we know how at first: we cry.”

“I don’t understand…”

“When we’re born, it is a natural instinct we have to let it be known when we need something. If we need to be changed – we cry. If we need to be fed – we cry. If we need to be held – we cry. And even though our parents may have read books or spoken to other parents about what to expect and how to

THE LIFE GARDENER properly raise us, they quickly realize that this information does not always work when it comes to the needs of their individual child. And so they try various things until they pick up on what works best for their little one. And this is how we teach our parents who we are and how to better take care of us so that eventually life becomes easier for all.”

Mr. Misaki looked at me to make sure I was following and then continued. “But while this is going on, our parents are also teaching us how to crawl, walk and eventually speak among many other things. So like I said, there is a balance of learning and teaching taking place.”

“Ok, now I understand, but how does this prevent us from discovering our purpose?”

“It’s what usually happens later that does,” said Mr. Misaki. “At some point we are taught to put our own needs aside to avoid being thought of as selfish beings. The balance of student and teacher becomes unbalanced as our parents, schoolteachers and society become our full time teachers and we, the students. We learn how to fit in, and slowly stop paying attention to our own unique needs by putting the needs of others before our own.”

“That’s interesting Mr. Misaki, but how do we make things better?”

“By paying attention to our feelings, Dave.”

“So, Mr. Misaki, what you’re saying is if I want to learn more about myself, I need to start paying attention to my feelings?”

“Yes, Dave, by paying attention and trusting our feelings we can begin to understand the unique individual that we are.”

“But what about books and the knowledge of others, can’t these be helpful too – like it was for me with gardening?”

“Absolutely, Dave,” said Mr. Misaki “We can learn a lot about ourselves, others and how to move forward in life from the knowledge that can be found in books or that is shared by others. However, only you can truly know how this knowledge

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK can be applied to your life – because no one else has ever been YOU.” “This is a lot to take in Mr. Misaki. It does make sense though, and I really appreciate you taking the time to share this information with me.”

“Just one more thing, Dave” said Mr. Misaki. He paused; giving me the sense that what he was about to say was of the utmost importance. “If a gardener is determined to make a tulip smell like a rose, he might spend years trying to achieve his goal, but he would eventually discover that it had been a complete waste of his time.”

With that, Mr. Misaki stood up, I followed, and we started to walk together.

“Tell me Mr. Misaki, what will you be doing this winter?”

“I’m happy to say, Dave, I’ll be visiting my family in Japan for the holiday season. In the New Year, I will be traveling the world, offering seminars and workshops to many people.”

“What?!” I exclaimed, as I stopped and turned towards him, “What do you mean?”

“You see Dave, in this city, I am the gardener for these magnificent gardens, but around the world, people know me as ‘The Life Gardener.”’

With that, Mr. Misaki handed me an envelope addressed to me; we wished each other well; and we turned to go our separate ways. But then a question came to me and I simply needed to have an answer. I turned around and called out to him, “Mr. Misaki, why do you bother with gardening if you already make money helping all those people around the world?”

Mr. Misaki slowly turned around, smiled and looked at me and simply said, “The best teachers in life never leave the role of student.”

 CHAPTER 10 

In the middle of December I began to prepare to visit my family for the holiday season.

The autumn had kept me busy with my new painting business, which was beginning to gain momentum. I was already making plans to hire another full-time painter after the holiday break.

Maria and I stopped seeing each other shortly after the gardening season was over. She had decided to move closer to her family and to her daughter Amanda’s father. In early August, he had accepted a new job two hours away. Maria and he continued to alternate weeks with their daughter, but Maria knew that this kind of traveling could not go on forever. The new position Amanda’s father had accepted was in the same town that Maria grew up in and where most of her family still lived. Moving back home simply made a lot of sense.

It was difficult at first, but it didn’t take me long to understand that this relationship was too soon for me. I was grateful, however, for our time together. It was tremendously helpful for us to share in each other’s company and to be able to talk about the challenges and transition that we were each going through.

The divorce was still at least a few months from being settled. It seemed like every time my ex-wife and I attempted

YEAR 1: THE GROUNDWORK to communicate we ended up fighting instead and would stop talking for a few months. It’s almost as if we were waiting for the divorce to finalize itself.

And still now, every single night, I thought of Vincent and my old life and wondered how I could be so confident about my decisions one day, only to doubt them the next. As hard as those decisions had been to make, it became even harder having to explain to others the reasoning that had led to them.

Maybe that’s why I often wondered if I had made the right ones.

With my suitcase in hand, I started to walk out my bedroom when my eyes landed on the letter Mr. Misaki had given me on the last day of work. I had pinned it to a corkboard on my wall to remind me of my dear friend.

Knowing that I would be leaving for a few weeks, I decided to pack it with the rest of my belongings – but not before reading it one more time.

THE LIFE GARDENER

FIRST LETTER FROM MR. MISAKI My dearest Dave, May the following help you on journey called life…

Your soul is the seed.

Your body is the flower.

Your life is the garden.

You are the gardener.

1st PRINCIPLE: The gardener is 100% responsible for his garden.

“Life is a piece of art, but only a few choose to hold their own brush.”

2nd PRINCIPLE: The more the gardener knows about the seed, the easier it is to help it grow.

“If a gardener is determined to make a tulip smell like a rose, he might spend years trying to achieve his goal, but he would eventually discover that it had been a complete waste of his time.”

Your friend,

Mr. Misaki The Life Gardener

YEAR 2 Nurturing & Care

 CHAPTER 11 

It’s hard to believe how quickly this trip came to be, but in only three days I’ll be sitting on the beach in sunny Punta Cana. For the first time in my life, I’ll be spending my birthday without the white tapestry of snow that we Canadians are used to see in March. “Am I missing anything?” I thought to myself as I finished packing my suitcase.

The last two and half months were absolutely wonderful.

It felt great to spend time with family and friends over the holiday season. January and February were amazing months for my new business. Usually, those would have been the two slowest months of the year for painting, but somehow, this year certainly wasn’t the case. I now had two full-time painters working with me, and I had stopped painting and was now managing the jobs.

The great thing about this improvement in my business was that it gave me a lot more free time. I took advantage of this extra time by reading books and dedicating more time to getting to know myself better.

I also discovered that I had a real passion for numerology.

The information I discovered about myself was a revelation to me. I discovered that it is my life’s purpose to combine creative and material success in such a way that helps others find their own source of inspiration. I also discovered that the two

THE LIFE GARDENER biggest challenges that I will need to overcome in my life are “Recognition” and “Creative Expression”. Looking back at my life so far, that seemed to make a lot of sense.

I was also very happy to rekindle a previous love for books about spirituality. To this day, I still remembered with amazing detail one particular book and the role it played in the conspiracy to give me a second chance at life.

It was the middle of February seven years ago, and my top foreman and longtime friend was following me on the highway on our way back home. After more than five months, we had finally managed to fix and finish the job that cost my business fifty thousand dollars. All I had come away with was the four thousand dollar cheque I held in my hand.

The previous months had been the hardest and most stressful time of my life, by far. And it made it hard for me to focus on the wedding plans my fiancée at the time, and I were planning for the following fall. About a month earlier, in the middle of January, the stress had reached its highest point and I felt like I had to choose between my business and my fiancée – the business won.

I’m not sure if it was because I was holding all the money that I would ever receive out of this job that made the whole thing feel more real. But, I just started to cry, and cry, trying my best to wipe the tears from my eyes as to avoid an accident.

After a little more than an hour driving, thoughts of ending it all started to make their way into my head. But the thought of my long time friend driving behind me, thinking I had been too weak to handle the stress, forced me to reconsider – but only for a few minutes.

An idea came to me then. I realized I could make it look like an accident. Over the last few months I had come to know every twist and turn of this highway very well, having driven it so many times. This area had many sharp curves and it would look convincing enough that an accident had occurred if I simply swerved off the edge of the road. I knew exactly where

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE and how this was going to take place. Just as I was about to make my move, my cell phone rang.

“Hey, how far away are you?” asked Sylvie, this woman I had met only a few days earlier.

“Huh… well… I’m not sure, probably forty-five minutes or so. Why?” I answered, not quite believing what had just happened.

“Ah okay. Can you come see me when you get back in town?”

“Huh… sure… I guess.”

With Sylvie now awaiting my arrival, the rest of the drive was much easier and forty-eight minutes later, I was at her door knocking. When Sylvie opened the door, she had a towel in her hair and seemed to be in a hurry.

“I don’t have much time, but come in,” she said, as she ran into the bathroom.

I just stood there trying to understand why on earth she would have asked me to come over if she knew she was going to be leaving. I mean, it was not even an hour ago that she asked me to come there. And then I saw it, on her dining room table, a very ordinary book.

“Hey, what’s that book on the table?” I found myself asking while she was still in the bathroom.

Sylvie opened the door, grabbed the book and handed it to me.

“Here, it’s called The Celestine Prophecy. I really think you’ll love it,” she said as she put her hand on my back directing me towards the door and told me I really had to go because she was already late.

That inexplicable turn of events convinced me that somehow we were meant to be together. I never told her how her phone call had literally saved my life that day, but in the months that followed, I tried to pursue a relationship with this woman. The only problem was she kept insisting that she really just wanted for us to be friends – best friends. And so, I

THE LIFE GARDENER endured the pain and suffering of being the friend she would come to for advice to help her with the men she dated, among other things. As hard as this was, I reminded myself that this was a small price to pay, while I waited for her to be ready to be with me. I had convinced myself that the only way I could ever repay her for what she had done for me on that day was to be the best man she could ever have asked for – only she never did ask for me.

It took about a year before I finally gave up and told Sylvie that I couldn’t be friends with her. While a part of me was convinced that I had made the right decision, other parts of me wondered what my life could have been like if I had endured just a bit longer.

As I lay on my bed, with my suitcase next to me, I came back to reality, got up and walked to my desk. To cheer myself up, I decided to go have another look at the beautiful pictures of this resort I’d soon be spending a week at.

 CHAPTER 12 

It was late afternoon by the time we set foot in the resort lobby. Looking around I thought, “It’s certainly not as nice as the five-star resorts I used to visit in my previous life, but at least I can comfortably afford the rates here.”

When we stepped inside our room, we knew immediately the room was not going to work. The person I had decided to take a vacation with was a woman I had met only three weeks earlier. It might sound a bit cliché, but we really were only friends. She had broken up with her boyfriend of over a year, and while she wanted to meet new people, she had made it very clear that she wasn’t looking to be anything more than friends – at least for the time being.

Joanne and I both shared a passion for cooking and had spent a few nights a week exchanging some of our recipes as we played host to each other. Then five days earlier, we both discovered we had been hoping to make our way somewhere hot and sunny this year, but didn’t have anyone to go with. The conversation that followed is the reason why we were now standing in the beautiful room with only one bed and a shower that featured a beautiful view of the entire room – but no privacy.

THE LIFE GARDENER We went back to the reception desk to see if there was any way for us to switch rooms. A few hours later we were in a beautiful suite with two beds and a private bathroom. And the best part – this upgrade came at no extra charge. I can only imagine how this week would have been if we had been stuck staying together in our first room. Still, two days later I realized that it wouldn’t have made much difference.

For the first couple of days, we spent most of our time together. It’s hard to pinpoint exactly what happened or when I made up my mind about it, but by the third morning I woke up telling myself that if I was going to survive the week, I would have to spend as little time as possible near her.

“You can go on without me; I think I’m going to sleep a bit more,” I said, hoping she’d believe me and leave the room without me.

“Are you okay?” she asked, trying to understand what was going on.

“I’m just tired, I’ll see you later on the beach,” I replied.

A few minutes after she left, I got up, took my shower and then went to a bar to read and have a coffee.

I spent the day and most of the evening by myself. I ate at different restaurants than we had in the first few days and ate at different times trying to avoid meeting her by accident. But I knew that at some point, I would have to face her since we did share the same room. So after dinner I spent time trying to understand what had happened between us to be so irritated with each other the day before.

I started to go over some of the discussions we had had and remembered feeling annoyance during some of them. A lot of time she didn’t seem to be paying attention to what I was saying and when given the chance, she would change the subject and make it about her. But I didn’t like that so I would then not listen to what she was saying waiting for my chance to make the conversation once more about me. Then I remembered something I had read earlier that afternoon in a

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE book. It mentioned how when something bothers us in someone else, it’s usually because we are struggling with that exact thing. It was referred to as “The Mirror Effect” and explained how we attract people into our lives to bring attention to parts of ourselves that need our attention. Kind of like a “low fuel” light or “check engine” light in the dash of a car.

Since the beginning of the year, I had been focused on learning more about myself. I thought back to when Mr. Misaki had said, “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” Perhaps, there had been a reason for us to be on this trip together; maybe she was here to teach me something about myself – but what exactly?

Later that evening we had a conversation and were very honest with each other. We both agreed that it would be best to spend most of our time alone for the remaining time of our vacation. It wasn’t like we tried to avoid each other; we simply agreed that we each needed time alone to reflect and what better place to do so than in sunny Punta Cana?

 CHAPTER 13 

Two days before leaving Punta Cana, I woke to the realization time was running out in this beautiful place and I needed to make the most of it. Since it was also my thirty-first birthday, I decided to treat myself to a massage later that afternoon.

I had always wondered how it would be like to have a massage on the beach with the magical sound of the waves crashing in the background. Well, it was incredible. After my massage, I noticed that the beach was nearly deserted as people were preparing for dinner, but I decided to stay a little longer to reflect.

As I stared out into the distant ocean, I thought how horrible it would be to be trapped in those pounding waves.

But then an awakening came from deep inside me and I began to see this scene differently. I realized that the water I didn’t want to be in – the water that was creating those treacherous waves – was actually the same water gently lapping at my feet for me and everyone else to admire.

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE I wondered, if I make a judgment based on the circumstances surrounding that water (or many individual drops of water)… does it affect the water… or just me?

I didn’t have the answer to that question, but I did know that we tend to judge people based on the circumstances that surround them, such as physical appearance, the job they have (or don’t have), how much money they earn, who they know and what car they drive. But in reality aren’t we all just together in this beautiful thing called life? Are there some of us who are simply better than others – not as worthy as others?

Or, are we all one and the same, with different circumstances surrounding us based on the choices we made in our past and the plan that was intended for us?

At that exact moment, I understood that just as a drop of water is sent here on earth for an important purpose, and eventually, finds its way back up to the heavens, so does each one of us. We each have a special purpose to discover and fulfill during our journey here on earth and the circumstances surrounding us does not define its level of worth or importance.

For most of my life I’ve had the feeling I had a very important purpose and contribution to make to the world. I justified putting my own personal interest ahead of everyone else’s because I believed it was more important for me to discover and realize this purpose. But as I continued to stare into those crushing waves, I understood that while some contributions might appear to be more significant than others, it is all a matter of perception. I now understood that we are all in this together and each one of us is just as important as the next person. The discovery and realization of our life’s purpose is a gift we are all meant to enjoy and fulfill.

As I continued to appreciate the moment that had just passed, I looked up towards the sky and thanked the Universe for introducing me to Joanne. I now understood that she had come into my life to help me understand this powerful lesson.

 CHAPTER 14 

Spring was now here and while my new business was going well, I wondered if Mr. Misaki would be able to have me work with him on a part-time basis this season. While, I didn’t need the money as much now, I still wanted to continue learning about gardening and spend some time with my dear friend, The Life Gardener. I decided I would give Mr. Misaki a call to see if he had time to meet at the coffee shop.

“Sure, Dave, how about we meet at one this afternoon?”

“Thanks, Mr. Misaki, I’ll see you there.”

We spent time sharing some of our experiences since last fall and we eventually got around to the purpose of our meeting. I asked Mr. Misaki if he would consider hiring me on part-time basis for the summer.

“Absolutely, Dave… would Thursdays and Fridays work for you?” he replied.

“Actually, that would be ideal. The end of the week is usually much slower for me.”

“But, Dave, would you mind waiting a few weeks before starting? There are four new gardeners who’ll be starting next week and I would like to have a few weeks with them to prepare the gardens and plant the new seeds.

“A new group of students, hey, Mr. Misaki,” I said with a smile that let him know, I would be happy to wait.

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE Mr. Misaki gave me a warm smile.

This was exciting, not only would I be able to continue working on my business, but also now I knew I would have the pleasure of working one more summer in the gardens. “What an amazing summer this will be!” I thought.

Three weeks later, on my first day back at the park, I noticed that Stephanie, who had been working with us, last year, had also returned. I remembered Stephanie mentioning that she was working nights and weekends trying to build a clientele as a massage therapist. I wanted to find out about it, so we made plans to go for coffee that same evening.

We ended up talking for hours as we shared stories of what we’d been up to since the last time we saw each other.

She told me that not only had she been able to make a steady income with her new business, she was currently studying to become a Reiki Master/Teacher and was planning to add this service to her business in the fall. I had never heard of Reiki, but told her that I would be honored to be her first paying customer. She smiled and then asked about my plans for my business. I told her I wasn’t entirely sure where it was headed, but I was happy for the free time it allowed me to have while not having to stress over money. I could make a bit more money by working more, but I discovered that money really wasn’t a big priority in my life anymore, at least not for the time being.

The following morning, to my surprise, Mr. Misaki asked me once again to work with him for the day. The previous day, we’d been busy removing weeds from the gardens and he’d explained to me that if we don’t regularly remove weeds from the gardens they end up consuming the flower’s nutrients and can eventually take over the garden.

“Today’s assignment is going to be different from yesterday, Dave. We’ll be looking at the flowers in the same gardens we were in yesterday and remove any brown and dying leaves from them.”

THE LIFE GARDENER “Why is it important for us to do this?” I asked, knowing there would be a good explanation.

“Because letting it go allows for more to grow” was his answer. I knew this must be part of another of Mr. Misaki’s Principles somehow, but decided not to ask too much. Mr. Misaki seemed to have a strategic way of revealing his wisdom and I didn’t want to interfere with his process.

“In the same way that removing weeds from the gardens gives more nutrients to the flowers, removing parts of the flower that no longer serve its purpose, leaves the rest of it with access to more energy to help it grow.”

I thought the concept made complete sense and followed him as we removed brown and dying leaves all day.

At the end of the day Mr. Misaki asked me to spend each Thursday removing weeds in half of the park’s gardens and each Friday removing the brown and dying leaves in the same gardens. When I asked, if anyone would be doing the same for the other gardens, he explained that those would be Stephanie’s responsibility.

 CHAPTER 15 

It was now early July on a beautiful Friday afternoon when Mr. Misaki came to see me. “Good afternoon Dave, do you mind if I interrupt your work for a minute?”

“Not at all, Mr. Misaki, I’m done weeding this garden anyway.”

“Good,” he said as he sat down on a bench nearby and motioned me to follow. “Dave,” he asked, “Can you tell me what two gardening and life principles you have you learned so far this summer?”

I looked at him, wondering why he decided to have this conversation so early in the summer. “I tell you Mr. Misaki, I knew it was only a matter of time before you would ask me what I’ve learned,” I said as I turned to face him. “I’ve been thinking about what my answer would be for a while now, but I’m still not entirely sure how removing weeds and dying leaves can apply to my life Mr. Misaki. So how about you spare me the embarrassment and let me in on the secret,” I said with a smile in my face.

“Ah, I see you don’t like to waste time, Dave” he said, while I wondered if he would insist that I give it a shot. “The third principle is, ‘letting go allows for more to grow.’”

Letting go allows for more to grow.

THE LIFE GARDENER “I’m sure you see by now how by removing brown and dying leaves from the flowers allows for the rest of the flower to grow much better.”

“I do,” I said, waiting for him to continue.

“How do you think this information could be applied into your life?”

“That’s where I got stuck before; I really don’t have any idea Mr. Misaki.”

“That’s okay, Dave. Let me ask you this then, have you ever regretted a decision you made in your past?”

“Mr. Misaki… of course I have, but what does that have to do with anything?”

“You see, Dave, a lot of times, people will get stuck wondering what their life could have been if only they had made different choices. We all make countless decisions on a daily basis, and while each one affects us in a very real way, there are no right and wrong choices in life, only different paths towards our life’s purpose.” He paused for a few seconds and then added, “By letting go of what could have been, we can focus our energy on what will be.”

“Mr. Misaki, that makes so much sense!” I exclaimed excitedly, finally getting it. Thoughts of the woman who had saved my life came rushing into my mind. I regretted not being able to endure the pain while I waited for her to realize that we were meant to be together.

“Would you like to know about the fourth principle, Dave?” Mr. Misaki asked, noticing that I had been lost in a memory.

“Yes, Mr. Misaki, please go on,” I replied.

“Very well, Dave. The fourth principle is, ‘weeds can only remain in your garden if you let them.’”

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE

Weeds can only remain in your garden if you let them.

Mr. Misaki continued, “Even the most beautiful gardens in the world have weeds growing in them. The difference is the people responsible for those gardens have made the decision not to allow them to stay,” Mr. Misaki looked to see if I was listening.

“I’m following,” I said, “but I’m not sure how this applies to life. I mean what would you consider a weed in our lives?”

“The first part of the answer is people.”

“People?” I asked incredulously. “How can you say that people are weeds? I don’t understand?”

“Weeds are just an analogy, Dave, please don’t forget that.

But what I’m saying is that certain people in our lives can have the same effect as weeds do in a garden. It is up to us to decided whether to have them remain a part of it or not.”

“I think I need an example to help me understand, Mr. Misaki.”

“Imagine for a moment that one of your employees has been repeatedly wasting his time painting your customer’s house and is taking twice as long as he should. What would you do?”

“Well, I’d fire him Mr. Misaki.”

“Now, what if you had been awarded a large and profitable painting job, but the day before it was scheduled to start, the customer approached you and said you’ll have to work sixteenhour days, seven days a week for the next four weeks instead of the two and a half months that had been previously agreed upon?”

“Well, I’d tell them that we couldn’t do that.”

“But what if he tells you that if you won’t do it, he’ll have to find someone else who will?”

THE LIFE GARDENER “I would still have to walk away from it. I wouldn’t want to kill myself or my employees for the sake of a big pay cheque,” I answered, now starting to see where he was going with this.

“Now do you see how certain people can have the same effect as weeds in garden when considering those last two scenarios?”

“Of course, if I were to allow such an employee to continue working for me – to be a ‘part of my garden’ – in time my customer satisfaction and profits would see a steady decrease.

Eventually, this would have taken away my precious time and energy as I tried to rectify the situation,” I said, excited to see this new perspective.

“And if you had allowed a customer of yours to dictate such conditions, you probably would have ended up sacrificing quality for the sake of getting the job done more quickly. And I think we both know what that could have lead to, right Dave?”

I looked at him, knowing he was referring to my “fifty thousand dollar mistake”, as I now called it.

“Right, Mr. Misaki!” I said, as he smiled at me. “And you might be interested to know that I don’t hold the financial institutions responsible anymore for the fact that I had to close my previous business.”

“Really?” said Mr. Misaki “Well that is certainly nice to hear. So tell me, what changed for you?”

“Well, I realized that it was my pride that prevented me from closing the business six years ago. Closing it just felt like a big failure that I didn’t want to have on my résumé. But now that I have my new business, the whole thing just seems worth it. Plus, I wouldn’t have met you if this all hadn’t happened,” I said, waiting to see his reaction.

“I’m glad I met you too Dave,” he smiled and continued.

“Now for the second part of my answer, the other thing that can be compared to weeds is our thoughts. More precisely, negative thoughts.”

“Can you explain how, Mr. Misaki?”

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE Mr. Misaki answered, “Another of my favourite quotes is one by Gandhi:” “Watch your thoughts, they become words.

Watch your words, they become actions.

Watch your actions, they become habits.

Watch your habits, they become your character.

Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”

I looked at Mr. Misaki, still taking the words he had just spoken, amazed at how clearly they explained the importance of our thoughts.

“So, if I understand this correctly, Mr. Misaki, this means that we have to be careful of negative thoughts, because just like weeds, if we don’t remove them from our garden, they can grow until they literally take over our life.”

“That’s correct Dave,” he proudly said then added, “Our thoughts are the seeds with which we fill our garden.” Mr. Misaki paused for a second to give me time to absorb this idea fully and then continued. “You know how the gardens in this park feature both perennials and annuals plants?”

I nodded in approval.

“Well think of the perennials as the people in your life and the annuals, you know those new seeds we plant every season, as your thoughts. Every thought we have shapes the way we perceive our garden – our life.

“That makes so much sense, Mr. Misaki. Choosing positive thoughts would be like planting beautiful annual flowers in our garden and negative thoughts would be like planting weeds.”

There was a moment of silence and then Mr. Misaki said.

“Dave, you’re making tremendous progress and as a gesture of my appreciation, I would like to offer you a new level of responsibility. I propose to make you the sole gardener for one of these beautiful gardens. You can choose any of the gardens

THE LIFE GARDENER you’ve been looking after this year, should you accept this responsibility.”

“Of course, Mr. Misaki, it would be my pleasure!”

“This new responsibility does, however, come with a few changes.”

“I’m listening,” I said, eager to know what they were.

“First, you will no longer be required to work all day on Thursdays and Fridays anymore.”

“You’re being too harsh Mr. Misaki!” I said jokingly. This in itself seemed like a really nice promotion.

“Secondly, now that you will be this garden’s only gardener, you will be responsible for ensuring it has enough water and fertilizer, like the responsibility you shared with others last year. And if it pleases you, you can plant new seeds as well.”

“So far so good, Mr. Misaki!” I said excitedly.

“Lastly, you will be required to spend a minimum of three hours per week, in the garden, doing something you absolutely love. It can be reading, listening to music or anything else that brings you joy. Is that still agreeable to you?” he asked.

I gave Mr. Misaki a look that told him his question didn’t require an answer from me. Of course I didn’t mind spending three hours a week doing something I loved. Plus, I knew exactly which garden I was going to pick. It had a bench in the middle of it, with garden stones leading to it. I knew I wouldn’t look silly sitting in the middle of flowers reading a book or listening to music.

“And finally, you will also be required to give your full attention to each of the flowers in your garden. Try to notice the changes that each is going through and before moving on to the next, send it a few words of encouragement – out loud or in your head.”

I believe Mr. Misaki must of known I would chose the “in my head” option. And although his last condition did make me uncomfortable, I promised Mr. Misaki that I would do it.

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE “Now let me show you the garden I picked, Mr. Misaki.”

 CHAPTER 16 

When I got home later that day, there was a message waiting for me on my answering machine. Although, this was not unusual with the calls I was getting for my painting services; I don’t think I ever could have prepared myself for what I was about to hear.

“Hey Dave, I’m really not sure why I’m calling, but it’s been a really long time. Give me a call when you get this, maybe we could go for coffee and catch up. Oh by the way, it’s Sylvie,” the message said.

Sylvie, was the woman I credited for saving my life all those years ago and whom I couldn’t remain friends with because it was simply too hard on me. “But why is she calling me now, after all these years?” I asked myself. “Could it be that she’s ready for us to be together?” I thought as I quickly grabbed the phone to dial her number.

“Hello,” said the voice at the other end.

“Hi Sylvie, it’s Dave, I just got your message.”

“Oh thanks for calling back so soon,” she said as she continued, “I’m really not sure what happened, Dave, but somehow about an hour ago, I just had this thought that I needed to call you. I debated it for a little while, but then finally decided to call.”

THE LIFE GARDENER We ended up chatting for a little while before making plans to meet at the market the following morning.

It had been a while since I’d visited the market and I was surprised to see how many people were here. It took me 15 minutes just to find a parking spot.

When I walked into the market’s food court, where we were supposed to meet, I was surprised to see her sitting at a table with two other men. A bit confused, I waved to her, hoping that she’d get up and join me. “Maybe she just bumped into old friends and decided to sit with them while she waited for me,” I told myself hoping this would be the case.

“Over here, Dave, come join us,” was her unfortunate response.

I wondered if I had misunderstood our arrangements from last night, but I was expecting to be meeting only with her. I sat down with them reluctantly, and almost fell off my chair when she asked me to fill her in on what I’d been up to in front of them. I later discovered one of them was an exboyfriend.

I just couldn’t find it in me to answer her question honestly, and said something that sounded like it had come from the mouth of a politician. After about twenty minutes of torture, one of her friends left, but her ex-boyfriend remained.

We walked around the market a while, before Sylvie’s exboyfriend finally left. I managed to convince myself what had happened was probably normal and that I must have simply been a bit jealous. After all, I was now the only guy by her side.

We stayed at the market for a little while longer but then she announced to me that she had to meet a friend shortly and asked if we could go for coffee tomorrow since we really hadn’t had a chance to catch up. I agreed, thinking that a coffee shop would have been a much better place for us to talk. After all we did have years of catching up to do.

When I arrived at the coffee shop the following day, I was once again surprised to see her sitting with someone else,

YEAR 2: NURTURING & CARE although this time it was a woman. As I approached, she waved hello to me and signaled for me to join them. I said that I would go grab myself a coffee first, hoping that perhaps this would leave her friend enough time to finish her conversation; but it didn’t. With my cinnamon-sprinkled cappuccino in hand, I sat down with them, wondering where this would lead.

They finished their conversation quickly, but once more to my complete shock, Sylvie turned towards me and asked what I had been up to in the years since we’d seen each other. She even pointed out that she wanted to hear the real story now, not the small talk version.

I sat there for a moment, wondering what was going on. I knew she wasn’t going to allow me to get away with the same kind of answer as the day before, so I ended up telling them with as few details as possible, how I had been married and divorced, closed my old painting business and started a new one.

After a half-hour or so, I left them there, saying I had a lot of phone calls to make in preparation for the next day. The truth was that I really didn’t have anything important to do that evening, except to try to understand what on earth could have been the meaning of this very strange weekend.

This concludes the end of the FREE preview.

To read the rest of the story, you can purchase the book from my online store by clicking on the link below.

Please note that you can also listen to some of the songs from the soundtrack, entitled “Lessons Learned”, by visiting my website. (All 12 songs from the soundtrack come up in the later part of the book).

Thanks for taking the time to read part of my book!

Remi 

About the Author Rémi became an accomplished singer and songwriter at the young age of 18. Shortly after the successful release of his first album – Xpressions – Rémi won a major singer/songwriter television contest in Quebec: Tremplin ‘97.

In the corporate world, it didn’t take long for Rémi to make his mark. In his first year running a painting business, he established records and won awards in production, sales and management.

Now, Rémi is pursuing his dream of becoming an accomplished author.

Rémi lives in Moncton, New Brunswick with the love of his life, Sandra, and their daughter, Zoé.

“The Life Gardener” is Rémi’s first book and “Lessons Learned” his second album.

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