Circle of Mothers

Photography | Priscilla DicksonIn Photo: Zelma Culpepper (left) and Deanna Joseph (right)

Infinite Support Through Endless Grief

By Sky U. White

As a mother, you pray for the best for your child(ren). Maybe

the best is making sure your children receives the finest education, and ensure that they are safe, nurtured and loved. You give them your all; sacrificing so much so that one day, they too can reap the benefits of what you provided them when they were young. For some, those benefits might be graduating from college, starting a career, getting married, and one day having a family of their own. Many of you want the “American dream” for your child(ren), but not every mother in the United States gets the opportunity to see those dreams come to fruition.

Today’s news stories are not much different from the stories Baby Boomers heard blasting across their black and white television screens. Black children being gunned down by those who swore to protect and serve has always plagued headlines. Nearly two decades later, Columbine High School is no longer the deadliest mass shooting in modern U.S. history. Children are bullying each other to the point of seeking suicide as their only means to escape. When cops remove a teenager from a school-sanctioned event for no other viable reason than being Black and standing too close to the wrong crowd, then he later ends up being hit and killed by a car, America, we have a problem.

As a parent, a mother, how can you ever expect to cope with the tragic, unexpected loss of your child?

Andrew Joseph, III

Andrew’s battered jeans from the night of the incident

Andrew Joseph III

Andrew Joseph III lived with his mother, father, and little sister in Riverview, Florida, and came from a successful and loving home. The Joseph’s moved from New Orleans, Louisiana, as a result of the devastation endured from Hurricane Katrina. They soon found Riverview to be their new home. Andrew attended a private Catholic school, was captain of his youth league football team, enjoyed fashion, and one day dreamed of being a model and famous clothing designer. Deanna Joseph, Andrew’s mother, described him as humorous, kind-hearted, thoughtful, and very mature. Andrew and his parents’ dreams came to an abrupt end on the night of February 7, 2014, when he was ejected from the Florida State Fair on Student Day in Tampa, Florida.

Andrew’s parents, Deanna and Andrew Joseph II, were never told that their son had been ejected from the fair. Nor were they provided a police report or even given a valid reason as to why Andrew had been removed. “Drew,” as he is sometimes called, had just been accepted into Tampa Catholic High School and was an honor student. He had never been in trouble a day in his short life. He was racially profiled by local sheriff officers, taken into custody, treated like a common criminal, and then released in the middle of one of the nation’s busiest interstates, the I-4 intersection in Tampa. It was there that Andrew was struck and killed by an oncoming SUV as he attempted to cross the busy intersection in the middle of the night to get back to the fairgrounds.

When Andrew was not at the agreed upon location, his father went looking for him, spending several hours walking up and down the fairgrounds desperately searching for his son. It was not until he approached a state trooper (as the fair was preparing to shut down for the night) that he heard his son could be the pedestrian struck and killed in the middle of the busy I-4 intersection. Mr. Joseph was in disbelief. Andrew could not drive. Therefore, he had no way of leaving the fair. Mr. Joseph was asked to identify the items removed from Andrew’s body as identification that the young, slim Black child lying in the cold morgue was indeed his bright-eyed son. The officer brought him a ziplock bag with Andrew’s shattered cell phone, school ID, and a friendship bracelet his little sister had made for him.

The life of Andrew Joseph II and Deanna Joseph would never be the same.

Only one of Andrew’s shoes was recovered from the scene.

Messages from classmates and teachers in memory of Andrew.

Memorial located at Andrew Joseph, III High School

Zelmound Culpepper

Zelmound Culpepper was born in Tampa and raised by his grandmother Zelma Culpepper, a local salon owner who worked to provide him and his siblings with the best. At the age of 2 years old on an Easter Sunday, Zelmound was involved in a serious motor vehicle accident where he was ejected from his car seat. Shortly after this incident, Zelma started to notice drastic behavior changes in her grandson. “Before the accident, Zelmound was quiet. Now, it was to the point to where he would just do things…As he grew older, that change got worse.” As a first grader, Zelmound was admitted to a mental health facility for 72 hours after threatening to commit suicide. Things only escalated from there. Zelma remembers a time Zelmound was caught stealing, selling those items, and then using the money to purchase food for the homeless. She recalls the perplexity of trying to understand why Zelmound felt he needed to steal when she was able to provide him with what he needed. Despite his behavior, Zelmound was a high achieving student academically. His instructors described him as a bright student with emotional problems.

On Easter Sunday, April 20, 2014, Zelmound was involved in an altercation at a local park and was one of two individuals killed that day. Zelmound’s mother succumbed to breast cancer and passed away 29 days after his death. When Zelma was asked how she mustered up the strength to plan her daughter’s funeral shortly after that of her grandson, Zelma replied, “I don’t know. My son helped me do it all.” Zelma found herself in emotional turmoil, needing support.

A young Zelmound Culpepper

Gravesite of Zelmound Culpepper

Park where Zelmound was killed following an altercation.

The Injustice Deanna Joseph, Andrew’s mother, sought support and found no one to whom she could turn.

“I felt so alone locally. There was no place to turn to. It was just an emptiness,” said Deanna. “My child is dead, and I’m supposed to just sit here and weep? I was tired of weeping.” Deanna and her husband reached out to local elected officials to no avail.

Deanna began traveling and meeting other mothers whose children had met similar fates. It was during her travels that Deanna met Jackie Johnson, the mother of Kendrick Johnson whose 17-year-old son’s body was found wrapped inside a rolled-up wrestling mat at Lowndes High School in Valdosta, Georgia, in January 2011. She also met with the family of Emmitt Till. Understanding that the Till family had been fighting for justice for over 50 years, Deanna reached out to the foundation located in Chicago, Illinois. Through this foundation, she connected with Sybrina Fulton, the mother of Trayvon Martin, a 17-year-old gunned down by a neighborhood thug, whose story eventually made national headlines and challenged Florida’s Stand Your Ground Law. Deanna was invited to attend the annual Circle of Mothers retreat in 2015, which was founded by Sybrina Fulton and Tracy Martin.

Shortly after the retreat, Deanna was encouraged and inspired to start a Circle of Mothers chapter in Tampa. The Circle of Mothers Tampa is a 501(c)3 and offers consistent support to promote hope, help, and healing to hurting mothers who suffer from the loss of a child. It was during

Deanna Joseph, Andrew’s Mother and Co-Founder of Circle of Mothers Tampa

Zelma Culpepper, Zelmound Culpepper’s Grandmother and Co-Founder of Circle of Mothers Tampa

Deanna and Zelma have been working together so support other mothers who have lost their children to gun violence and other forms of neglect.

the first meeting that Deanna Joseph and Zelma Culpepper met and soon became good friends. To date, 20 mothers are a part of the Circle of Mothers support group with plans to expand from Hillsborough County to Pinellas County. “We have group calls. We talk about it [their losses], we cry about it,” said Zelma. “It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to be sad, but you got to pick yourself up and keep going.”

The Circle of Mothers Tampa chapter offers support meetings every third Sunday of the month where they focus on transforming pain into purpose.

“Collectively, we remain parents to our deceased children,” said Deanna Joseph. “Sadly, due to unforeseen

circumstances, we are now forced to parent from the grave.” Although there are thousands of mothers suffering from the loss of a child, Deanna and Zelma are encouraging all of them to attend at least one meeting and understand that there are moms who sympathize with their loss. Both women have become instrumental in the development of the organization and helping other mothers cope.

For more information on the Circle of Mothers Tampa, visit andrewjosephfoundation.org.

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