RFD Issue 24 Summer 1980 by RFD Magazine Gay

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C R I S I S

Since the time of putting together the issue and after having made the collective statement, we have come to realize certain things about RFD that we feel should be brought to the attention of the readers and subscribers. There is definately a financial problem that need immediate attention and that you should know about. To begin with, printing costs are very high and going up. In addition, postal rates may also rise, and as it stands, RFD is being sold below cost in most instances. We figure that with general operational expenses it adverages about $1.5 0 to paste up, print and mail each copy (at 1500 copies), or about $2300 an issue. Book store sales will yield only about $600 (selling at a loss, by the way), and they currently have about $1400 payable. There is another $700 outstanding which seems to be pretty much unrecoverable. Further, RFD owes about $1,000 in loans and back bills. Except for new subscriptions and the sale of back issues, there is no other income. There is hope to develop advertising, but the circulation is so low now (110 0 ) that it's not too realistic to expect any substant ial income from that source just now. Sub scriptions are very lowj there are only about 500 (half of which are non-paying). In light of the above, we propose several changes in policy. We will take these suggest ions to a circle at the forthcoming gathering to be held at Running Water (Sept. 19-21). Based on the response, advice and discussion there, we'll institute the agreed-upon changes aimed at ameliorating RFD's continuing financial crises. Our proposals arei (1) Raise the cover price to $2.75 which will bring the book store sales into at least a break-even or small "profit" position. (2) Raise the subscription price to $8.00 ($11,00 First Class & Canadiani $12.00 Foreign & Institutional). This will yield about $ 2.00 a subscription per year toward the debt and against in flation and other unknown expenses. (3 ) Instead of offering two copies of the issue published in to contributors and a year's free subscription, just offer the two copies. We will continue to offer a year's free subscription plus the two copies of the issue worked on to the collective which prepares a feature section, but we will limit the number of free subs to five per collective.

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If ever in the future RFD becomes affluent enough, we can then review the submissions policy and consider offering more to con tributors than the suggested policy here affords. (4) Ask the prisoners who receive free copies of RFD to request their next issue each time. This will place a small burden on those particular subscribers, but it will assure RFD that everyone is receiving a copy who should be and that there will be no waste. (5) Develop a Consulting Circle of about a dozen experienced and interested RFDers to whom we can take important decisions like these and get some feedback and advice. (6 ) Write to former sbuscribers to solicite re-subscriptions as well as promote more subscriptions through ad vertising in other journals, etc. (7)

Develop advertising for RFD,

(8) Continue to appeal for donations from those who can help in this way as well as search out others sources of funds. One of the reasons we here at Running Water have assumed the responsibility of co ordinating RFD is that we want the journal to succeed and survive. It is a very important publication for the gay community. Of course, there is room for improvement, and we have several ideas about that, but we must deal with first things first, and for us the first thing is to eliminate the cash flow problem and get the journal paying for itself. This issue has waited nearly four weeks since layout completion simply because there wasn't the money to begin to pay for printing, not to mention mailing. It is only because a very generous RFDer loaned the journal $500 that we've finally been able to go to press. We all thank him because he's certainly not wealthy and his support is heart felt. The point is that we don't feel the journal should have to rely on "band aids" or loans from a few committed indivuals to keep it going financially. Even aside from in creasing the price of RFD, etc. we will need to raise at least $1,000 to get partly out of debt and rolling. In order to keep our postal permit we must get out two more issues before the end of December, and who knows where the funds for those issues are coming from...... you, us all of us, everyone.

Rocky, Ron, Peter & John

Q istwct

HODODBNOHOU

CONTRIBUTORS Franklin Abbott

Glen Allen

Ted Bohn

R F Brauer

David Frey Steve Garman

Collective Statement ....... ........ ........ ........ .........

Letters ........... ................... ........ ........ ........ 3 Gatherings News

.......................... ............... 4

Running Water Farm ....................... ....................

News and Announcements .......................... .............

Draft Advice and Comment .......... ......... .............. ....10

Rex Remembers - Rex Harold ........ ................. ......... 12

Steve Ginsberg

What's Left? (Political Comentary) - Milo ......... ....... ...12

Milo Gutherie

Brothers Behind Bars .................... ............. ........15

Rex Harold

Affirmation - Chris L&ndberg ......... ....................... 17

Daniel Gary

Ouija Advice - Snooky

............................... ........18

Harry Hay

29. 37

Len Hayes

Mickey (Short Story) - Joseph Uher ............................19

John

Poetry - M. Mason, S. Garman, D. Sunseri, D. Savickious, S. Thorning, B. Matthis, B. Sloan, L.Hayes ........ ..22

Don Kilhefner

Gay People At a Critical Crossroad - Don K i l h e f n e r....... ...25

Chris Lftndberg

Jim Long

Michael Mason

2 2 , 47

Bill Matthis

Ken Mills

Fred Osgood

Rod

Danial Savickious

Benjamin Sloan

Snooky

Jerry Stamps

Toward the New Frontiers of Fairy Vision - Harry Hay

28 29

Faerie Wings of Verse (Poems) - Jim Long ........

Faerie Power/Gentle Resolve (Poem) - Franklin Abbott .........35 If One Walks Slowly (Poem) - Glen Allen .......................35 Taurus on Virgo on Taurus (Poem) - Ted Bohn ........

A Call For a Gay Community Land Trust - Harry Hay ............ 37 Todays Best Buys/Back Tax Sales - R F Brauer ................. 39 Hair & Jock Itch (Home Remedies) - Jerry Stamps ............. .40 Growing and Canning Tomatoes - David

Frey .....

Kitchen Queen - Rod, S. Ginsberg, K.

Mills .................. 42

Contact Letters ............................ .......... ........ 43

2 2 , 23

Off (Poem) - Michael Mason ............. ................. ....47

Steve Thorning

More Notes From Hermit Hollow - John ....................... ..48

Joseph Uher

David Sunseri

Editing staff

John, Peter, Rocky & Ron

Poetry Editor

Michael Mason

Political Editor

Milo Gutherie

CORRECTIONS # * * # # * * * # * * In issue #22 (Winter 1979) the drawing on page 42 is by Sidney Smith. In issue #23 (Spring 1980 ) the poet's name is THORNING, not Thornberg as listed.

PRODUCTION STAFF FOR THIS ISSUE Fred Osgood, VA Gary Schliemann, Aust. John Jones, NC Michael Mason, FL

Mikel Wilson, NC Paul Knapp, NJ Peter Kendrick, NC

Rocky Patt, NC Ron Lambe, NC Wing of Men, GA

STAtEMENt We'd also like to encourage feedback from readers on this and future issues, as that's one of the few ways we know about what people want to see more or less of. Our general sense is that we'd like RFD to appeal to as varied a readership as possible: clones, sis sies, ferns, isolated men living alone, those living in groups or with lovers, bisexual men who want to explore and nurture their gay awareness, radical fairies, fagqot warriors; rural and urban males of these and still other perspectives. We don't know if that's pos sible. We do know that a love of nature is a quality common among many gay men, that coun try living is becoming a more viable alterna tive all the time, that sharing information, experiences, and feelings is essential for all of us. We see RFD as one vehicle through which some of that sharing can take place. We are encountering many problems, of course: this issue is very late getting to you (we expect to return to schedule by the winter '80 issue, incidentally); subscriptions need to be built up; and we don't even know where we'll get the money to have this issue printed. Nevertheless, the vehicle has been created and survived, so we're confident that it can con tinue to survive, even flourish. We have found many people here to help and there are many more all around the country. We are, by the way, very interested in hearing from groups in other parts of the country who'd be interested in doing a feature section; many regions have never been represented in RFD. write 1 This issue does not have a particular theme, as such. If pressed to give it one, we would probably point to the fairy con sciousness articles in this issue, but this is our first one and we're frazzled and confused, so we hope you won't press us. The fall fea ture is being done at Afton, VA and will have music as a theme. The winter feature will focus on the Ozarks and will be done by some folks in that area. If you have relevant skills or contributions, see the Info. Page. Special thanks are due Faygele for his continued help, use of his attic for storage, not to mention the incredible amount of love and energy he has poured into the journal for a long time.

This issue of RFD is characterized by a good deal of transition for the publication. It has now moved to its new home at Running Water Farm, in the mountains of western North Carolina. It also now has a collective as its caretakers and that's us. We're the Running Water collective (and now the RFD collective, apparently), and there is a short piece on who we are further on in this issue. We live in an area labelled by several local road signs as 'Rhododendron Fire District' -- hence the title of this issue. We'll be acting as coor dinators for RFD for some time into the hazy future, a task which has heretofore been accomplished by Faygele Ben Miriam since the summer of 1978, when it as transferred to North Carolina from Oregon. Another sort of transition occurring is an experimental one; a change in the assembly process of RFD. Beginnino with the upcoming fall issue, general production of the journal will be done here at Running Water; whereas the cover and a feature section of each issue will be assembled by a different group or community (this issue has been totally assem bled here due to time constraints, etc.). In our discussions we arrived at this decision as a way to nurture the essence of the journal and to hopefully interject more consistency and continuity as well. For ex ample, we found that a great number of con tributions have been passed on and on with each issue to the next collective to the point where some of it is well over a year old and no doubt some of you out there have wondered whether your poem or graphic or other contribution was ever even received. That's one of the drawbacks of an 'editor ship' which changes with each issue, and one reason we decided to try another way. Nor do we want RFD to be a showcase for the opinions or talents of any particular group (ourselves especially included, natch). It will continue to be, as much as possible, a reader-produced journal, with our role being to present and enhance the contribu tions submitted. We will make decisions about whether or not to use contributions on the basis of their appropriateness, quality, and amount of material we have of that par ticular type. We won't be able to print what we don't have, though; so if we per ceive an inbalance in the content of our contributions, we'll probably end up solici ting material from our personal resources or producing it ourselves. If you perceive an imbalance, let us know or, better yet, contribute something'. It's amazing how many contributions come in from the same people and although their energy and crea tivity is admirable, w e ’re sure there are many untapped skills and creations out there that haven't yet surfaced. See inside back cover for more information.

Hello Loves!

Dear RFD,

This in response to F.J. Barnes’ letter in the winter issue - in part of the letter it is implied that anti-nuke articles and articles about wimmin don't pertain to gay men's country living - I'd like to say why I feel dif ferently . I live way out in the country, but if brown's ferry (^0 miles from here) has a meltdown - which it almost did - I ’ll have to leave my land and all the work I ’ve done here, I don't use elec tricity and even if I did it wouldn't come from brown's ferry - its electricity is sent far away via huge power lines - every day brown's ferry (& every other nuke) is allowed by law to discharge long lasting radioactivity into the wind - the NSC & newkiller industry locate their nukes way out in the country, where us "ignert hicks" won't put up a fuss I can only assume that they consider our lives to be less important than those of city peeple. There haven't really been many articles about wimmin in RFD, and consider ing how important wimmin are in my life, I wouldn't mind seeing more articles... That's all I have to say about that except that during the Apr. 26, I 98O anti-nuke march on Wash. I'd like to see a very visible lesbian & faggot presence.

It is time once again to take my thoughts and place them in some form of literary structure. Looking over the Spring issue of RFD I was pleased with Randy Krahn's goat-milking stand, very practical and inventive. My favorite article was "An Open Letter To The SouthEastern Network" by Cal Gough of Atlanta. Cal was right on and expressed feelings I have had and can relate with. What burned me, however, was the omission of a recipe for to-fu in the Kitchen Queen section. Some delightful recipes for the use of to-fu, but no recipe for the to-fu itself. (Unless you wanted to pay for it). C'mon peo ple - doesn't anyone have a recipe for to-fu they could share with us? I'll make a trade with you, how about a run-down of growing and can ning tomatos in exchange? I'll include it with this letter. Last but certainly not least, I would like to thank you for the tons of mail I received as a result of my plea for correspondence in the Winter Issue. I have even been lucky enough to meet a very special person who is traveling halfway across the continent in order to be closer. We are putting out goals and love into prac tice and couldn't be happier unless of course I was out of jail and walking the hills and forests once again. Obviously, the purpose of RFD is being realized with each issue. I see other country faggots have met and grown closer as a result of RFD. Let's get even closer, there is no limit to the dir ections we can go, the infor mation we can share, and the love we can generate. Faery Power is alive and well in rural America!

born to struggle, C lear Hot Rock, TN

Much Love, David Frey # M 3 7 9 2605 State St. Salem, OR 97310

I was so happy to get RFD 2 3 . I was getting wor ried that a) something was wrong, b) I'd forgotten to re-subscribe, or c) the US or Canadian P 0 had screwed things up (again!). But here you are and I couldn't be more content. David and I are not set to buy our house that we cur rently live and love in. This seems to be step I of our fu ture dreams of "movin' out" to the country/coast/farm areas we both love. Unfortu nately, we're making it more of a process than a muchneeded desire which I think it should be. But we both nave good city Jobs for now (me a letter carrier - him a social worker) and Vancouver seems to need us more here for a while. Once the house is bought though, we foresee fixing it up more, living in it awhlLe, finally re-selling it and then persuing what we both want, out on the lands of the Northwest. Time, dears... I enjoyed #23 very much (how many times do I tell you 1 always enjoy RFD?), but was surprised at so much intellec tual content (to my mind any way) at the beginlng. 1 real ly had to read it all s-l-o-wl-y to let ideas sink in. Nothing negative about that, mind you, but I don't remember going through an RFD so "glu ed" before! Not to miss any thing. Ah well, things change, breathe and take in new life, right? From my last letter ap pearing in you fall 79 issue, I got a number of contacts. I was very thrilled as they came from as close as Victoria, to as far away as the Midwest & Montreal. It was wonderful writing to (and meeting some) RFDers all over the place! We are everywhere! ftgain, the invite’s out to all of you to visit me & David here. We're out of the city itself and the house is big and lovely to "live" in. Friendly cats (3 ) and plants (many) plus a car (stubborn) to travel with. All good companions for us. Take care and keep well. Love to our gay brothers (and sister, Cathy) who got the spring issue together. You’re all wonderful. Bye for now, and love. Bill Houghton P0 Box 2253 Vancouver, BC Canada V 6B 3W2

Dear Sir, Dear RFD, When last you heard from me, I was living in LA with my family and a fairly new piece of paper from the U. of California. Well, now I'm in SF, living alone, and it feels like I'm a lot closer to the rural life I long for. I now control, to a much greater extent, what I con sume and how I spend my time. Granted I still have electri city and flush toilet, but I can now also grind grain, cook bread, and sprout beans & seeds. What all this is saying is that RFD should continue to be for rural faggots, but they (and RFD) should remem ber that many "rural faggots" live and breathe in the city. I en.ioy reading about sheep and chainsaws - some day I will have to deal with both. I also think nuclear power and sodomy laws are import ant, so I hope to see some of that, too. RFD, to me, fills a need that both the Advocate and the Mother Earth News come close io filling, but don't. Anyway, that's my two cents worth.... yours in the Mother, Chris Sherbak 2345 Post St. #21 San Francisco, CA 94115 (415) 921-0263

More Letters RFD, I would like to get cop ies of issues #1 and # 2 , eith er to buy (name your price & I'll see if I can afford it how about part of it being a contribution to RFD?) or for me to photostat. Jan Suter 309 Navajo Maumee, OH 43537

Please allow me a few minutes of your valuable time. I'll make my plea short and sweet. I am a self-made million aire, seeking only thousands upon thousands of letters from across the U.S.A. from Gay people, to support me in my suit against the State of N.C . Back in the sixties, I had to serve a two-to-four year sentence for "crimeagainst-nature." The state violated my Constitutional Rights by throwing me into prison with thousands of sex-starved men and boysj causing me to endure "cruel and unjust punishment." My attorney, F. Lee Bailey, and I need only these letters of support. I'll be more than happy to answer any questions asked me by anyone. Sincerely,

Note» RFD is publishing this letter as it doesn't have these back issues availbale for sale - at least at this time, and perhaps some read ers can respond.

Gordon (Sonny) Alfred Phillips Jr. P 0 Box 145 Mount Mourne, NC

28123

GATHERING y :y' first night. Each of us had a chance to tell the others something about ourselves and all became closer. Then we lifted our voices and hearts as one in songs and vibrant energy. Meals were wonderful. Everyone had a chance to prepare nourishing food for their brothers, and/or to clean up afterwards. All were la bours of Love and sharing. Daily excursions to the swimming hole were looked forward to. Some skills were shared of varying in terests. Beekeeping was discussed as a group explored the inside of an active hive. Wool carding and spinning was demonstrated by Doug and Jerry. The vests, sweaters and hats they make bring some income to their homestead farm. A circle on country survival was lively and could have continued longer. We discussed economic, social and emotional survival. Mostly social, and I feel as a co-host, the gathering itself was a great benefit to my own emotional survival. Sunday morning the circle assessed the weekend. We agree it is different from a previous gathering and has room to continue evolving. A future gathering was planned at the same location on the Fall Equinox, Sept. 19 21. More skills will be available to be shared along with the nurturing of our souls, with the hope that third world men will attend. For further information, write toi

GOOD NEWS FOR THE NORTHEAST On the weekend of July 3 - 5» twenty gay men gathered together for a non-confrontive, non-therapeutic but deeply human exchange of love skills and insight, for our own growth and common survival. The weekend, advertised in RFD, GCN and around the northeast, as a "gathering of gen tle gay men" was held on a farm in rural up state New York near the Canadian border. It drew men from Boston, NYC, Buffalo and Ottawa as well as rural folks from around N.Y. Camp ing out space was available in the meadow on the ridge. The weekend was led by the group itself. Individuals with particular interests and needs were encouraged to step forth to offer whatever they could. Each day began with a circle for welcoming the day and plan ning the day's activities. Country air and hills, and good fooo along with a loosely structured weekend has given hope to the need to find and ma^e real and human contact with others. in circles we discussed the need for networks of commun ications and the need to develop our senses 0! community. A step has been made toward this. A network of such gatherings now exists throughout the country. A small but growing group has developed in upstate New York as well as in NYC and *n Boston so that such systems of support will continue. A circle was held around a fire on the

Dave

Blue Heron Farm Box 144, Rt. I Dekalb, NY 13^30

I find myself taking the vibrations of a gath ering back to the dominant gay culture as found in "the bars", not by necessarily talking to people but by being open and spreading a feeling of love and warmth around me when I am in that rather tired and tight environment. In our own small way we are changing the culture that we must take a part in. In closing I would like to point out that there are beginning to be gatherings of this same nature all around. I am beginning to feel a webb of energy develop between us that will make us free.

FULL MOON NETWORK Shortly after the Summer Gathering at Running Water, the moon was to be waxing into fullness. We were still glowing with fellow ship and fairy sharing and wanted to continue the feeling, not letting go, not separating. As there is a particular energy associated with the full moon, some of us thought that a meditation at the same time on the night of lunar brightness would be a good way to con nect with each other. Friends could visit by way of moon beams and enjoy the woods and peace of shared times past. Well, there have been two full moons now since the gathering, and we here at Running Water have felt the presence of many of our friends, full of peace, love and laughter. So, we thought that it would be a good thing to open our circle to all fairy spirits in the RFD family. The basis of our sharing is the mind and spirit, and we can use these means as well as our corporal vehicles for communica tion if we but choose. The next three full moons are on Aug. 25 conveniently at 9*^2 PM, Sept. 2k at 6»00 AM, and Oct. 23 at 2»52 PM. Since it would be ra ther impractical for most people who work to catch the varying times, we propose that we just use 9 PM (EST) on the day of the full moon. Won't you join our circle in the moonlight? Ron of Running Water

- Mikel Wilson Fellow Fairiesi On the fifth of May, 1979 I was privileged to participate with 5,000 brothers and sisters in the first out on the streets open Gay demon stration in the history of the kingdom of Bel gium. This liberation of Antwerpen was probably the first open manifestation of faerie freedom in that place since pre-Roman Celtic times. During the evening, after the demonstration an arena was taken over for a Gay celebration featuring plays, skits, revues and much much music. It was largely a Dutch affair as some thing upwards of 3»000 members and friends of the Nederlands national Gay organization, the C.O.C., participated in this friendly invasion of their neighboring land which much to the distaste of the free flowing Dutch, still has homophobic laws on the books. Although I caught a lot of good vibes at the evening gathering as well as during the march, there were also moments where my soul fled into a state of abstracted solitude and I felt apart from the whole that was there. Perhaps this failing had to do with all the internalized baggage of repression that even an individual of faerie sensibility can be submerged in from time to time. So as I some times do when I feel so very alone in a gather ing, I turn to poetry. LEAVES o f l o v e Antwerpen 5-5-79 My dance is not seen by my Gay brothers Its rhythm is tuned to the swing of my axe to the measured smoothness of its arc to the hard holding integrity of the oak the flat, flaking precision of popple or the green, gothic phallus of the spruce. My feet are cased in tight-laced leather planted in the stance of the woodland mas ter or perched precariously but perfectly upon the trunk of a windfallen giant. Like a boy I run on fallen leaflets axe in hand and dogs running behind. It is my element and I am at one caring for the woods that waste once ruined nursing and doctoring with my simple tool. I am with the Earth and she’s with me but my brothers flock to city pleasures a place of hard eyes and freezing money music of the moment and air filled with 8tsnchcs • Shall my soul settle into a small oakling which I have rescued from crowding popples? Only if beautiful youths will find a place beneath my branches, above my roots to make free and naked love upon the fallen leaves of my summer's body.

SE NETWORK BLOSSOMS Running Water, June 19P0, impressions. The largest gathering ever held at Running Water Farm attracted a crowd of 70 men. The weekend was yet another experience with open anarchy at work. Perhaps even more so than at previous gatherings. There was a continous flow of circles that one could attend dealing with diverse topics from body work/ new games to serious political discussion. The most important aspect was that one did not feel compelled to attend any of the structured events. Personally the only work shop I made it to was an hour long watermelon feast that was oh so sweet. I have a feeling that after a few years of infancy that the "S.E. Network" has now come of age and that we will be looking for new and more complex ways to involve ourselves with each other and the world around us. The gatherings are still the only times of the year when I am able to be around spirits/persons of the same desires, goals and emotions as myself. I am discovering that these are spaces for intense personal sharing unlike any other.

- Spiritwood

f o u r t h a n n u a l l e s b i a n /gay

conference

The fear was expressed that they had attended to discover local lesbians and gay men. Jayr believes that future conferences must streng then their security arrangements, without paranoia, to protect conference participants from harrassment and abuse. With over 50 workshops, with titles such as Lesbians and Gay Men of Color, Country Living For Gays, Gay Teachers, Fairy Nature, Legal Clinic and Confronting The Bible Bullies, with six nationally-known keynote speakers, with a new play, concert, singers and dance, with an opportunity to meet interesting people and share feelings, joy and frustrations, the conference seemed to offer things for everyone.

held

IN NORFOLK, VIRGINIA -by Daniel Gary CHALLENGE OF THE 60**

The Fourth Tidewater Lesbian/Gay Confer ence, held over July 4 weekend at Old Dominion University, is over and the general impression felt by most participants and organizers was that it was a good one. The workshops and keynote sessions began July 4 morning in the Batten Arts and Letters *Building of the university and ended the fol lowing night with a concert given by Therese Edell and Betsy Lippitt. The conference closed Saturday night with a dance. Sunday, the fine weather produced a large crowd of lesbians and gay men on Virginia Beach. It was expected that 400 to $00 would attend the conference, however only about 300 showed up. Many people connected with the con ference believe that the lower turnout was largely due to the scheduling on July 4 weekend. A major problem made apparent because of the drop in attendance was that the conference was in debt at the end of the proceedings by some $1300. But, when this was announced to the conferees almost $550 was raised by passing the hat, including $150 donated jointly by the Carolina Gay Assoc, and the SouthEastern Conf. Workshop leaders also refused to accept their traveling expenses, so that, finally, the debt was cleared. "The conference committee is ex tremely grateful to everyone who cooperated by donating time and/or money," said Jayr Ellis, one of its members. With regard to the conference, Jayr said, "I think that the workshops were well attended, which meant that we responded to the needs of the people more than we had in the past. The response that the audience gave to the key noters really made me feel good. I felt that we had a good range of speakers, all addressing issues that were important. Many people had thought the six keynoters were too many, but afterwards, they had changed their minds. The quality of the speakers was outstanding." Asked if he felt that the theme of the conference, "Growing Togetheri Challenge of the 80's" had been addressed, Jayr said, "Not formally, perhaps. But, informally, I felt that we did learn to grow together. There was no great division among the disparate groups of people there. There was a sense of understand ing and harmony. For example, I felt no ani mosity towards the transexual/transgenderist people who were at the conference." Joan Mayfield added, "I think that one of the things that I was real pleased to see was that there was a lot more Third World partici pation than previous years, so from that point of view the theme was well addressed." During the conference when it was announ ced that religious fundamentalists were plan ning to demonstrate against the conference on campus, the conference committee decided that, in the event of a demonstration occuring, the conference should continue as planned without confrontation. "This decision was reached," said Jayr, "because we felt it was better and right at this time to concentrate our energies on being with each other, with other gay men and women, rather than be dictated to by out side forces, involving time-consuming diver sions ." However, no demonstration took place al though several fundamentalists managed to re gister for the conference. When it was realiz ed who they were, they were quickly removed.

(from Our Own 4ill) CELEBRATION

RELINKING

WITH THE WAYS OF OUR MOTHER THE EARTH A north east gathering for gay, feminist men to reclaim and re-explore our connection with the gentle life-death cycles of nature and the earth. General areas to explore include 1 SURVIVAL OF THIS PLANET * Feminism and nuclear weapons Nuclear power Men and Nature Our role as gay men and feminist men BODY WORK * Herbal Healing Shiatsu Polarity Dance SPIRITUALITY * Our relationship as men, to lifedeath cycles Meditation Witchcraft Ritual circles for ourselves and the planet LIVING GENTLY ON THIS PLANET * Alternative life styles Rural living Sprouting Compost Practical knowledge This is a test balloon to see what energy for a gathering such as this exists. At this point it is simply the dream of one man on paper. If this gathering is to occur we will need a col lective of men to do the nitty gritty details. ±1 you are interested in making this gathering U reality, or have a vision of your own to share, please contact me. Rick Cotroneo

8? Irving St. Somerville, MA 02144 (6 17 ) 776-3452

Possible northern California Gathering of all rural gay men sometime after harvest in Oct. Might have a place in Lake Co. but would prefer Mendocino. For more information contact 1 Steve Ginsburg, Box 79. Mt. Aukum, CA 95^56 or Randy Krahn, Box 67-C, Bridgeville, CA 95526 6

R U N N I N G

W A T E R

F A R M

Running Water Farm is fifteen acres on the south slope of Roan Mountain in western North Carolina. Actually the word "farm" is a bit pretentious for our mountain homestead which con sists of a garden spot, small field, old apple orchard, even-older rustic house, and woodland areas with brook and springs. And yet, upon entering Running Water one senses a special mag ic here, which sets it apart from other places. The cover picture of this issue captures this spirit by portraying Running Water as a world unto itself. There are four of us living at Running Water (John, Peter, Rocky and Ron). We have recently come to live here from different urban areas of the country. Not too long ago each of us made a decision to make a change of lifestyle and environment by moving to the country. Our common goal is to live in harmony with the land creating a healthy and aesthetic environment. We hope to lessen our dependence on "the system" by growing roost of our own food and creating alternatives for satisfying other needs. We are yet at the very beginning stages of achieving self-sufficiency, but it is the direction of our intent ions. We first learned of Running Water Farm through RFD and gay men who had attended gather ings here. We were told that the owner Mikel Wilson was ready to sell the homestead he had been putting energy into for six years. He es pecially wanted to pass it on to an individual or group who would maintain the gatherings which had been held here for two years. After invest igating the property we found it beautiful, mag ical and fitting for our purposes. The four of us formed a corporation entitled Stepping Stone, Inc. through wich we purchased Running isiater . We closed on the property on Friday of the week end Fall Gathering last September (1979). This surely was a high point in all of our lives. At that time a need for a home for RFD was discussed during the sharing circles. Running Water seemed like a natural center for RFD as many of those who actively participate in the magazine, convene here for the twice yearly gath erings. By the summer gathering this year, we believed we had made enough progress getting our homestead organized and establishing our social order to take on yet one more challenge. Through RFD and the gatherings we hope to assist in developing the network of gay men attempting to explore their attunement with na ture and each other. RFD has played a vital role in furthering this wonderful discovery pro cess! Our intention is to let it continue full force in uncovering new concepts on the faerie frontier. May hearts ever dance through these pages and nimble minds smile with the delight of recognizing ourselves yet wholely new and transformed.

WiU nc*

The church leaders who had opposed the inclusion of Our Own in the libraries have threatened to sue the city for making available what they have described as obscene and pornographic material. On July 2, one of these minis ters, Mr. Rodney Bell of Tab ernacle Eaptist Church, an nounced that he had begun a petition drive that would re quire a referendum on the issue in the November general election. To accomplish this, referendum sponsors must abtain approximately 6,200 sig natures of qualified Virginia Beach voters by September 5* Members of the Unitarian Universalist Gay Community (UUGC), which publishes Our Own, are equally disappointed by the effect of city coun cil's actions which will be to prohibit the distribution of Our Own in the community information sections of the five branch libraries. The Virginia Eeach library has a policy of accepting unsolic ited material for distribu tion, and for 18 months until mid-March of this year, small stacks of Our Own were placed in the library branches where interested readers could pick them up free of charge. Sev eral times during this 18 mon th period, objections were made against this practice, but both the library adminis tration and the library board upheld the eligibility of Our Own for distribution. At the time of its ban, a total of 60 copies were being left each month in the city's lib raries. UUGC spokesperson, Jim Early, has said, "In remov ing the right of the publish ers to distribute Our Own, which had met all previous tests for eligibility, no city official, including city council members, city manager, library board members, or lib rary director, has provided an explaination of this change in

COUNCIL CURTAILS GAY PAPER*S CIRCULATION

On Tuesday, June 2^, 1980, each of the 5 branch libraries of the City of Virginia Beach, VA began accepting a single display copy of the monthly gay newspaper, Our Own Com munity Press. This action ended the library's three month old ban of the news paper, which had been init iated by City Manager George L, Hanbury. Without authori zation from either the library board or city council, Hanbury ordered the removal of Our Own following the objections of at least two city council members and protests by area religious fundamentalists. After the City Manager's action in March, the Virginia Beach library board on April 7 , made a recommendation to the city council that it per mit one display copy of Our Own to be placed in the per iodicals section of each branch library. This recom mendation was not acted on for a period of two months, during which time the ban continued. On June 16, after heated debate between spokespersons for Cur Own and opponents, city council attempted in six different votes to resolve the issue, but all of the pro posed resolutions failed. Mayor Pat Standing then ruled that in the absence of a de cision by council, the library board's recommendation became effective. One week later, on June 23, as a result of the Mayor's request, the Virginia Beach City Attorney issued his opinion that the Mayor's rul ing was correct parliamentary procedure. On the following day Our Own once more became available on a limited basis to Virginia Beach library patrons. *

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NATIONAL GAY YOUTH NETWORK The National Gay Youth Network is one of the goals oriqinallv set by the Gav Youth Coalition when the groun was first being organized. we are hooing to create a vital link between youth groups and organizations throughout the country. We are especially interested in present groups in the vicinity of the Bay Area, and are will ing to help and communicate

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within the United States. We need to be informed of your group and others in your area. Send us names and ad dresses of contact persons, as well as groups; if possible, please send current events listings, plus regular meeting tiroes and places. Send all correspondence to: National Gay Youth Network Box 14412 San Fransisco, CA 94114 8

procedure. As far as we know, the library board has barred no other publication from dis tribution in the city's lib rary branches. In the case of Our Own, arbitrary discrimination is obviously being prac ticed," Early said. The single display copy which is permitted in the library is not being kept with current newspapers and magazines. Instead, "periodi cal section" has been redefin ed by the library administra tion to include a file box, labeled "community newslet ters" at some branches, and unlabeled at other branches. At present Our Own, along with about half a dozen other publications, is being kept in these file boxes. "The effect is to make it virtually im possible for a reader to find Our Own without asking for it by name," said Early. "The name of the newspaper is not in anv index nor on file anvwhere in the library. While many people in Virginia Beach are praising a system that 'withstood' the pressures for censorship, it is little no ticed that a major concession - in the decreased visibility of the gay newspaper - has been made to the fundamental ist lobby," Early added. At its June 2L meeting the UUGC formally voted to retain the American Civil Liberties Union of Virginia to represent it in legal ef forts to have the right of distribution restored. Dis cussions with officials of the ACLU and national gay organi zations are underway. Anyone who is interested in making donations to help defray the costs of legal action may do so by sending a check or money order, pay able toi American Civil Lib erties Union of Virginia Foundation, c/o UUGC, 739 Yarmouth St., Norfolk, VA 23510. Please specify that the contribution is for Our Own. * * ■ * * # # * *

LIONHEART, a new gay theatre company in Chicaeo is now producing plays by Chicago playwrights to benefit Gay Community Services. For in formation, contacti Rick Paul 1912 Central Wilmette, IL 60091

1NITMACY

GAY ALCOHOLISM

T.F.SBIAN/GAY CUBAN REFUGEES A WORKSHOP FOR GAY MEN National and local gay organizations are working to find homes and jobs for the thousands of lesbian and gay Cubans living in refugee camps. At a July 7 meeting in Washington, D.C. called by the Universal Fellowship of Metro politan Community Churches (UFMCC) and the National Gay Task Force, plans were made to co-ordinate a natiowide effort for the resettlement of lesbian and gay Cuban refugees. Representatives of Dignity, In tegrity, Parents and Friends of Gays, Gay Rights Advocates, and the National Organization for Women attended. Subsequent to the meeting MCC developed an informational packet on sponsorship for use by local groups. MCC also visited the camps to inter view lesbians and gay men so that an accurate assessement can be made of their situation. Estimates of the lesbian and gay population range from a low of 2,000 up to a high of 10,000. The gay (as well as the non-gay) populations are about 90% men. The informational packet includes a list of questions for the prospective sponser to answer so that a reasonable match can be made. Among them is one to determine whether an effeminate male would be a problem in your home or com munity. Others ask if you speak Spanish and whether you have a job for the refugee. Federal immigration laws do not allow foreign gays to enter the United States, but the legal status of the gay refugees is in doubt. How ever, there does not appear to be any interest on the part of the federal govern ment to send back the gay refugees. For further information contacti

Facilitated by Frank Abbott and Gary Piccola. Atlanta, October 11. Fee is $25, limited to 15. Please make reservations. For more information, contact 1 Frank Abbott 1422 Iverson St., NE Atlanta, GA 30307 (404) 524-1465

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A MASTER OF SCIENCE PROGRAM IN ECOSYSTEM

A Master of Science Program in ecosystem manage ment and appropriate technolo gy is now available at Antioch University West. Areas of concentration include passive solar design, environmental planning, horticulture and landscape design, integrated pest management, habitat pro tection and restoration, and sustained agricultural devel opment. For more information contact 1 Antioch Univ. West 650 Pine St. San Francisco, CA 94108 Financial aid is available. * * * * * * * * * * *

UFMCC Washington Field Office Suite 210 110 Maryland Ave., N.E. Washington, D.C. 20002 or UFMCC Cuban Relief Fund Suite 304 5300 Santa Monica Blvd. Los Angeles, CA 90029 - Fred Osgood

The special needs of lesbians and gay men with drinking problems have been largely ignored by alcohol and other drug abuse agen cies. Although a gay orien tation in no direct way caus es alcoholism, drinking pro blems are common in the gay community. Accurate figures are difficult to obtain, but it is estimated that up to one out of three gay people has problems with alcohol. It is likely that two major factors contribute to the problem of gay alcoholismi 1) personal pressure on the gay individual as a result of society’s hostility toward and rejection of homosexual ity. 2) a lack of alternatives to bars as a place for gays to socialize and be themselves. Recognizing that gay al coholism is a problem, the Wisconsin Clearinghouse has published, Lesbians, Gay Men and Their AIcohol and Other Drug UseT Resources. This pamphlet annotates some of the few articles, pamphlets and films available on this subject. It was written for several diverse groups, in cluding alcoholism counse lors, members of the gay community concerned with this issue, and anyone in terested in developing a better understanding of lesbians and gay men. The above phamphlet by Susan Christenson and Gayle Ihlenfeld, 1980 (15 pp) is available through the Wis consin Clearinghouse, 1954 E. Washington Ave., KadiBon, wi 53704, for 350 plus 25* for mailing and handling. * ■ # * # * * # * * * *

I WANTYOU TO THINK BEFORE YOU REGISTER FOR THE DRAFT

REGISTRATION is No Joke! Before you register, THINK about what it means, and the OPTIONS open to you. YOU CANi REGISTER by filling out a form with your name, address, birthdate and social security num ber at a U.S. post office, to be entered in a computer. No requests for deferments or ex emptions would be considered at this time. If Congress later approves a return to the draft you could be called to report for induction into the armed forces. SIGN UP AS A CONSCIENTIOUS OBJECTOR to war. Although Congress refused to provide a place on the registration form to indicate whether you are a C.O., you can write "I object to war" across the form. Selective Service will not consider claims of conscientious objectors un til classification of registrants is resumed, but you can document your beliefs by writing a statement explaining your opposition to war and sending it to a group listed in this article.

Draft The Daft : Questions Are you living more but enjoying it less? Are there obstacles in the path of your happiness? Is it more than you can take? Are you stoned enough to be happy, Knowing what you know? Do you feel your country is threatened by dangers its leaders are unaware They encourage? Are knowledge and wisdom Often in conflict? Do wise leaders seek to avoid conflict? Are you registered for the draft? Are you 18 to 80 ? What does Uncle Sam Want You for? Will Johnny come wheeling home Again ? Would you like to serve your country A dose of its own medicine? Are you one of a few good men?

STAY HOVE AND NOT REGISTER. During the Vietnam war an estimated 250,000 young men didn't register for the draft and were never identi fied. If identified, you may be treated as a "late registrant" and given another chance to register. Or you could be arrested and prose cuted. SEE BELOW. RESIST the draft system by publicly refusing to register. Submit a letter in advance, or simply appear and state your refusal to cooper ate. Nothing may happen right away. But you would be subject to arrest and prosecution. Maximum penalty for failure to comply with selective service law is five years in jail and/or $10,000 fine.

What are you doing later? FOR .YORE INFORMATION call or writei

Michael

Committee for Conscientious Objectors 2208 South Street Philadelphia, PA 19146 (215) 5^5-4624

Mason

(Selected from a phamphlet produced for Survi val Summer 1980 by the Peace Education Div. of the American Friends Service Committee, 1501 Cherry St., Philadelphia, PA 19102). J 10

/ lesbian counselims Ancresistance network))»)»»»»»»»•*>

mmmmmw gay

A Gay/Lesbian Draft Counseling and Resistance Network has been organized in Los Angeles in response to the Carter Administration's re sumption of draft registration this summer. The work of the newly formed group will include« 1) providing draft counseling specifically designed for gay men and lesbianst 2) developing printed infor mation on the draft for young gay peoplej 3) training gay draft counsel ors as well as serving as a

training resource for non-gay draft/resistance groupsi 4) non-violently resisting the Selective Service Systemi 5) networking with other gay men and lesbians around the country involved in draft counseling and resistance activities. Lisa DeSoto, a Network organizer, statesi "In the coming months we will need to produce new literature, train more counselors, reach out to gay/lesbian youth, and answer the questions of desperate 18 year olds whose futures are being determined without their consent." The Network has already

begun the training of 12 gay/ lesbian draft counselors in Southern California. Harry Hay, another organ izer, reportsi "During the Vietnam War, our people were provided much non-information or mis-information, often with tragic results, by many well-meaning draft counselors. We plan to be better prepared this time." The Gay/Lesbian Draft Counseling and Resistance Network office is located St 53^3 La Cresta Ct., Los Ange les, CA 90038. For further information contact Lisa DeSoto at (213) 483-4145 or Harry Hay at (213 ) 469-7949.

I have read many issues or RFD and have now decided to write to everyone (via RFD) and express appreciation for the input of personnal stor ies, poetry, opinions, photo graphy, art, letters and support in keeping this fine country journal a real outlet. I ’m a 32 year Sagittarian, ex carpenter, father, Viet vet and the list could go on. I am presently a "Hoedad". If you're from V T , NC, MN or any where else other than the Northwest, your reply to such a word is probably "What is a Hoedad". Okay! A "Hoedad" involves the pride of working and living in the largest and most successful worker owned coop in the Northwest! We work and live in the backwoods of Northern California, Ore., Wash., Idaho and Montana. The work may include tree plant ing, trail construction or maintenance, tree thinning and watershed maintenance. There are about 300 of us that are sub structured into crews. My crew is called "Cheap Thrills" and maintains approximately 25 members. The typical person is a diversified human with freelance interest in any and everything. Our united con cern is to maintain our Coop structure and procure fores try work so as to earn a liv ing. The Hoedads Coop has been a successful business for country oriented hippies for p years now. One of the in terests is our political in volvement in the state of Ore. Another one is to make work

ing standards for forestry workers much safer - which in volves the anti-herbicide stand we are making primarily against 2-4-D and 2,4,5T. I was raised on a farm in SW Iowa and know farming. I look at tree planting as another mode of rural living and would like to recommend this work and life to the rural minded adventure seek ing gay man. Most crews en courage membership of gay men (& gay women). I feel moving to Eugene, OR and getting in volved in the Hoedads was one of the more positive aspects of accepting myself as a gay man, and the best way to see the beauty of (the) NW wood lands is to tour as a tree planter. If you would like more info on this please write to me. I was really blown away with the coverage on the faer ie gathering. It really sounded as though I should have been there to experience and share - but as in so many other gatherings, money talks too loud. I'm presently try ing to sell my land near Crater Lake, OR and get out of heavy payment stress. When it does sell I am interested in re-investing into a co-owner ship with several other gay men on a small farm (prefer ably in Oregon). Why Oregon? Oregon has a state conscious ness of ecology more than any other state that I know of. I've been an activist in en vironmental issues for nearly 10 years now and it seems like Oregon is the only state in to passing laws for the good and welfare of the environmental state of conditions. Yes,

that is why I moved to Oregon. With Nuclear plants going up everywhere - none has been erected in Oregon for over 5 years now. I'm ashamed to say we do have one here in Ore. it's located at the very northern tip of the state. But it will be real hell for the "pigs" to establish anoth er one. When will people re alize that with each Nuclear plant that is erected - we will have one more target for the carefully aimed warhead missile of our foe? Being a purple heart vet I am active ly involved in the anti-draft and registration movement. I know what war can do as I am still answering to frustrat ions and war activities. I guess the enclosed article, that I initially wrote for the recent Hoedad newsletter, will say it. I would like to share it with the RFD family because I'm concerned with us rural gay men and our love for life. War is something I have no more time in my life for - and my gay brothers be lieve mei our country doesn't need it. Oil for our blood, bullshit! One more item be fore I close) I really dig the way publication of our country journal is being handled. I would like to see it go to Minnesota, Arizona and of course, Oregon again in the near future. And now as I sit in my tent out here in the Olympic National Forest resting for another day of planting seed lings in the stripped areas, I ’m thinking of the drive to the unit and it brings about the words of the last verse of a poem by Ray F. Zaner,

My Retreati The mist now rising from the stream Will veil the glen from the sun's bright gleam But the curtains will rise in the usual way For the thrill, work and joy of another day. And I would send you if I could The sounds and beauty of this wood.

Peace be with you brothers and smiles easy and often. Rex L. Harold Hoedads C.T. P 0 Box 10107 Eugene, OR 97440

In December of 1967 , I arrived in Vietnam and by the end of the year I had picked up the pieces of a man blown apart by an anti-personnel mine. By the end of January I had received my first combat medical recognition for ad ministration of medical treat ment while under hostile at tack and enemy fire. In August I received a Purple heart signed by George Patton Jr. for wounds I re ceived in action and "valor" recognition for doing fool martyr acts while under fire.

I experienced, first hand all year, the strain of war on men the same age as you. These very men questioned daily their survival possibi lities. During one week in August I recall having turned in 77 Purple Heart tags. I was lucky enough to walk home on my own two feet after a year of death paranoia. I would like to tell you how I lived through 12 years of continual stress since I ’ve returned, how I've relived many unforgetable incidents, and how I am still at war in many ways though you hear no gunfire. I want you to be assured of an obscene truism that once our economical sys tem has utilized you as their pawn, they really do throw you away with no regard to your psychic or mental well-being. Believe me when I say there are no band-aids that can ever cover-up a war stress scar. I can guarantee you that there is nothing worse than watching a young man going through a series of spasms, screaming, crying and a death fear re action all at oncej this is something a corporate execu tive does not know exists or maybe it's a "doesn't care attitude". My attitude is somewhat expressed in this piece of literature by Greg Ross 1 "I want to write such simple truths that surely it will be clear when we talk, my brothers but war is just a word to you. I want you to understand that in a war if you don't get killed, you come home a killer

Since writing an article on the 19 °0 elec tions for the spring u-D, my perspectives have changed radically, but then, that is what I always thought revolution was about anyway... Basically, the Citizens "Party" is not what it was cracked up to be. Despite their own highflown propaganda, and despite the efforts of a substantial minority at the Cleveland convention the CiP is not grass-roots! it is not even a partyj it is a Barry Commoner for President Campaign, and a very poorly-run one at that. The rich boys in charge of it plan ballot access through Labor Day, then a media blitz, and then will get a footnote in the World Almanac. More likely than not, that will be +he end of the CiP. Good riddance. Well, 1 said my perspective had radically changed. It has only been three months since I sincerely believed that the CiP would be the herald of a new re-aiigrment in American poli tics. 1 wanted the lesbian and gay movements to be in on the ground floor of this formation. We were fairly well-represented at the Cleveland Convention, held several caucus meetings, and 12

and your world is populated by ghosts that ask you daily why they went from life to noth ingness at the end of a string of blood and gone shattered by a death force. I want to tell you how it has changed me, of how it has affected my life, of why I have anger and pain and shame of the scars to my sanity, but...war is just a word to you my friend. I want you to know, with out knowing, first hand, what it is like to live inside the war machine - to be an android with feelings - but war is just a word to you and if you are lucky, it will always be such." So to follow this up with a short summary of "I was drafted" should be all you need to know what this is all about. We must not be forced into the registration or the draft. We cannot allow the war hawks or our nation's ecconomists to use our life and our blood as their crutch. This issue is "NOW" just as 2-4-D and -2-4-5T. They will use it unless we obstruct the use of it. Today we have a choice and tomorrow we may not! Let's all actively participate in the rally against re-instating registra tion and the draft for the present and our young brothers still under the age of 18. The Persian Gulf veterans could have it much worse than what I have experienced. Think about it! -from Hoedad Newsletter

got our concerns included in the platform. How ever, as of this writing (June 22) I have not seen the final version of the platform. Unfor tunately, I no longer trust the process of the Ci+izens Party, and I doubt whether the Gay Rights plank of its platform will have any bearing on the content of the Commoner Campaign. At this point, let me insert a little back ground information. .he Citizens Party emerged in 1979 as a result of discussions held by lib erals and philanthropists in New York, Washing ton, Chicago and St. Louis. Central to these early discussions were Stanley Weiss, a busi nessman with international mining interests?

whereas an independent, candidacy can only accept up to a $5,000 limit. We also couldn't understand why the Party had no national news letter or communications medium; this is still a good question. The only answer I can imagine is that the honchos don't want to let anyone else know what is going on. By the time we got to the Cleveland Convention, we were very con cerned with how the thing was going to turn out 1 w e ’d been somewhat out of touch with the national office, and with the other advocates of the grass-roots tendency. At the conven tion. there was much back-room maneuvering by both sides, especially around the elections to the Steering Committee; this was to be the crucial vote for control of the party’s dir ection. Several state delegations were told by Commoner and DeLeeuw that the election of Lu Walker to the SC would precipitate the with drawal of Commoner from the Presidential race. They didn't even bother to convey this message to our Tenneessee Delegation; I guess we were too insignificant. Elections were also held for National Co chairs of the Party, even though the Consti tution wasn't officially adopted yet. Sort, of like in Zimbabwe, where the settler regime tried to have elections before majority rule. The Majority Caucus supported Marjorie Allen, a white woman from the N.Y. party, and Ken Gallo way, a black man who was a leader of the Con sumers Party of Philadelphia. The grass-roots tendency backed Dan Leahy, a working-class white man, who had devoted many months to run ning the national office, and Denise CartyBennia, a black woman who heads the National Association of Black Lawyers. She had not been active in the Party for long, and was brought in by Arthur Kinow. In an extremely close el ection, the two women won. Everyone was rea sonably happy, we had elections for the SC, and the Convention adjourned. Then, the SHIT hit the fan!! Lu Walker had been defeated in the SC elections. Ironically, he and another black man were passed over in favor of women who actually had less votes and who were seated in order to ensure a sexual balance. Because of this result, Denise resigned her position, and the black caucus walked out!! This threw the entire hall into pandemonium, as we re convened as a meeting of the party, not a con vention, and discussed racism and the whole matter for a couple of hours, finally voting to take no action. Needless to say, this freaked everyone out to a very high degree. Afterwards, Commoner played the role of a politician, deny ing to the tv cameras that this was a serious matter and proclaiming that this walkout was by a very small faction. We chanted "bullshit, bullshit" as he walked away. I heard that the Grass-roots tendency (people from N.Y. & N.J.) held a couple of meetings, but I don't know what resulted. The Commoner campaign lurches forward, underfunded and staffed by rank novi ces. There has been a complete staff turnover since Cleveland, because all the staff were on the wrong side. The rich boys' caucus is try ing to run the show, without anyone to empty the ashtrays. At the Cleveland convention and before, there was a facade of grassroots participation in the writing of the platform which has subse quently slipped away. Power was yielded to the National Committee, which appointed a smaller subcommittee to do the re-writing. Both groups ignored or circumvented instructions of the Convention, and produced a document which is more conservative than that passed by the Cleve land meeting. The membership will be asked to ratify (sooner or later?) a document largely written by a small group of the CiP "leader ship." Gales of protest from local chapters

David Hunter of the Stern Fundi Don Rose, who helped elect Jane Byrne to the Chicago mayor alty; Harriet Barlow, of the Institute for Loc al Se lf-i\eliance; Archibald Gilles, of the John Hay Whitney Foundation; Geoff Faux, an econo mist from Main; and Barry Commoner, author and ecologist at Washington University in St. Louis. Many other activists from the Environmental and arti-nuke movements became involved. Others chose not to get involved, arguing that the formation of such a party was premature. The latter view was held by the leadership of ACORN, a community organizing group which began its work in Arkansas. In August of 1979« the "Citizens Committee" registered itself with the Federal Election Com mission. Information about the new formation was hard to come by, and I scoured the pages of "In These Times", "Mother Jones", and the "Vil lage Voice" for news. In late 1979. as the Kennedy Candidacy experienced its short-lived heyday, the idea of a new left-liberal party faded from my consciousness. Then, in Feb. of I 98O, the question arose at the Atlanta Faerie gathering, and I phoned an organizer in Atlanta. He informed me that a Steering Committee meeting was to be held in Nashville at the end of the month - how convenient! I contacted a friend of mine there, and I discovered that he was helping plan the meeting, and was now the Mid-South Staff Co-ordinator!! Soooo, I went to the meeting, and was seated as one of the Steering Committee members for Tennessee. A lesbian who was a representative from New Hampshire and I came out publicly at the meeting, and we bagan to push for the inclusion of gay issues and gay staff in the party. At this point, a CarterBush race seemed possible, and the Anderson can didacy hadn't emerged yet as an independent force, so the situation looked ready-made for the strategy of a new party of the left in the electoral arena (circus??). Also at the Nash ville meeting, a two-line struggle became evi dent between the electoral tendency, supported by Commoner (later to be called the Majority Caucus), and the local organizing tendency, supported by Marilyn Clement, Lucius Walker, and Arthur Kinoy. We later called this the Grass Roots Caucus. Lu Walker, instrumental in building the February 2nd Anti-KKK network, had brought to the party many people involved in organizing around the country. He was one of very few black people in the Party, and led a struggle to do outreach to third world and working people. Anyway, the two groupings seemed fairly balanced at this meeting, and the grass-roots (left) forces appeared to win sev eral victories. There were also struggles con cerning the staff and the Executive Director, Bert DeLeeuw, The staff formed a union of sorts, to defend their rights. So, 1 spent six or seven weeks knitting my friends in Tennessee's fourth district into a local of the Party, and preparing for the Naional Convention in Cleveland. John, the re gional organizer, experienced much frustration in his work, partly because promised salary and funding from the National Office never materi alized. It seemed like the people with the money didn't like the way the votes had gone at the Nashville meeting, and turned off the bucks. John and I also couldn't understand why the "party" office was never separated from the Commoner for President campaign. Although Com moner wasn't officially the nominee, his cam paign could have preceded the nomination, as happens in the two big parties. In retrospect, it appears that this was never done because the controllers of the effort never intended to build a real party; they wanted a Commoner Campaign in the guise of a party, because a party can accept donations of up to $ 20 ,000, 13

the Feminist, Gay, Peace, and Anti-Nuke move ments. The National Office is located at 339 Lafayette St., New York, NY 10012i phone (212) 677 -1 1 4 5 . Feedback and support are appreciated. The Tennessee Campaign can be reached at P . 0. Box 14-1 , Woodbury, TN 37190. Our slogan is "Out of the closet and onto the ballot". It should be an interesting campaign, to say the least. By the way, Dave is the first openly gay person to run for the Presidency since the Equal Rights and Cosmo-Political Party nominat ed Victoria C. Woodhull in 1872!! She spent election day in jail for slander. Early in the campaign this year, someone at a WRL meeting suggested that Dave ^et arrested and run from jail as Eugene Debs did in 1920 (Debs was in for opposing WWI). People took the suggestion seriously, but Dave didn't go for it. He might, get busted yet; it's a long time to November. If RED readers are interested, I am open to continue this column for a while, covering the 1980 elections and movements from a_fairypolitico perspective, or periodically dipping into the dust bin of history to comment on the past foibles of the U.S. left. Perhaps w e ’ll wax eloquently on the vision of gynandrous culture in a classless society, or whatever else pops into my pointed little head. AnywayWHAT'S LEFT???

have had little effect on this process. Again over local protests, the National HQ has taken over complete control over ballot access drives, through the appointment of a "near-czar" cam paign. The Executive Committee recently decid ed to spend $ 250,000 on ballot access, and then hundreds of thousands more on a TV blitz for the fall campaign. Not only will this be in effective in getting votes for Commoner, but it is a joke - the party is broke and has no pro spects of raising much money. All national level efforts are aimed at winning 5% of the vote,difficult goal at best. In event of fail ure, it seems that most of the present leader ship will give up and quit, despite their past rhetoric about the "long haul". At this point, I feel that the whole epi sode of the CiP has burned a lot of people out, and perhaps fatally crippled the concept of a mass party of the progressive forces in this country. The "leadership" has cynically ex ploited and manipulated the widely-felt need for a new party in the inept execution of their own poorly-conceived elitist power-play. The episode certainly taught me a lot of lessons in a few short weeks. Let's don't be fooled again! Don't follow leaders, watch the parking meters! Trust the autonomous mass movement, not the politicians. I don't believe that the giant corpora tions and their political flunkies would yield power to the Citizens Party even if it could win the stacked-deck elections. Peoples' power will be attained through the activities of the autonomous movement and ist natural leadership, not some self-proclaimed party, whether vanguardist or electoral. I saw the CiP as a vehicle to link up the various movements for social change and unify their efforts. This networking is the primary activityi participa tion in elections can provide visibility and a unifying overall purpose. The present leader ship of the "party" seems to believe that power can be taken through elections alonei at least they have made very few efforts to support any other kinds of activities by the party. Some supporters of the grass-roots caucus have re mained in the party, hoping that the Majority Caucus will fade out or loosen its grip after November. They see the predicted re-alignment happening several years down the road, and want to lay the groundwork for it nowt when the labor unions do get ready to split from the democrats, the CiP will be in place with a good track record of support for working people. Well, to them I say good luck, but I won't give anymore free energy to a formation I feel so unclear about. (I could be bought, but have received no offers.) I have shifted my electoral activities to the campaign of David McReynolds and Diane Drufenbrock, the candidates of the reconstituted Socialist Party, U.S.A. (Not the Socialist Workers Partyi not the Socialist Labor Partyi the Socialist Party. Got that?) A queer draft dodger for President, and a Catholic nun for V.P. - unusual, if of questional relevance. Seriously though, Dave is a long-time activist with the War Resisters League and was resis ting the draft when 1 was in diapers!! Dave is gay, and makes no bones about itj but he says he doesn't identify with a movement based only on sexuality. Neither do I. He has been interviewed in the Advocate, and GCN ran an article on the campaign. These articles are being distributed by the national campaign office. While I harbor no illusions about the strength or potential of the SPULA, and won't try to build the Party in Tennessee, the cam paign is an important gesture to make at this time. It can also facilitate my networking in

• sa fe '

brothers behind bars Dear RFD Readers 1 Dear RFD, I have just read two of your news letter publications, Fall 1979 #21 and Spring 1978 #1$, I realize there are many other subscrip tions that I have not read, but it is only because I have just found these thru another friend. I am gay, and I am in prison. I am also from Canada. I am French and Greek. Let me explain whyI am here and why I have come to write you. Currently I am serving a sentence for theft by receiving. I came to this country to teach ski lessons. I obtained a work permit from the U.S. Government and moved to Aspen, Colorado. I bought a pre-fab "A" frame and lived 17 miles (from) North Slope. I opened a Ski Shope - rentals and the purchasing of skis - until one day I found out all of the equipment I had purchased the summer before was hot. I had a partner that was a crook and well, it was also part my fault. I should've been aware of what deals my business partner was making before I signed my name. The end result brought me four years for theft by receiving. Now the reason I am writing you} I really became interested in your paper for many rea sons - seeing gay people come forward rather than hide as I have known all my life. To be able to share our feelings and ask others to share with us. I am by no means a cloBet case, but rather while I am in here, I'd much rather keep my life style and history to myself. It really becomes very lonely when you are locked up. I never knew such loneliness could exist within a person's heart and soul. I would very much like to correspond with anyone who is honest, sincere and won't take my situation with sympathy. I am a free loving person and would like to really meet someone. I hope that maybe (thru) your paper, since it reaches many, that someone would see my letter and write me. Let me tell you about myselfi I am 32 years old, French & Greeki I love the moun tains, wild life and all God’s creations. I love to ski, and I also love warm nights by a fireplace and good conversation. I write poetry which by the (way), I am sending you a poem that I just finished. Let me give you a better description of myself. I ’m 32, blond hair, blue eyed, 6'3". I realize it doesn't really matter what I look like, but it helps one to know what a person looks like if they are to write. I will ex change photos and letters with any and all who write. Please, I don't need money, stamps nothing really. The only thing I would love to have is a pen pal who is honest about him or her self. I'd much rather have a male to write to, but it doesn’t really matter. I am not sure if I will be going to England} Man chester is very beautiful. I would like a reason to stay here in this country but as of now, I have none. Please if you could help I would greatly appreciate it, honest I would.

The administration at the Oregon State Penitentiary goes out of its way to harrass and abuse the gay inmates in the prison. The penitentiaries gay community, or at least the ones who don't try to hide in the closet, are subject to abuse by the guards, and forced to abide by prison rules that only apply to no other inmates. The gays in the prison are forbidden to associate with indivuals they like or love. If a gay is found talking to another whom the guards have for bidden, then they take and lock the gay person up in the "hole". But this applies to only the gay community. Now it is impossible for the gays that are known to live in a cell-block that has double occupancy cells. This dis crimination applies to no other segment of the inmate population. The prison officials simply decided that all the known gays would be place in single cells. "This has to come to a halt!" ItYs not as if the gays are per secuted by the other inmates, because that is not the case. It is the warden, and his guards who have it out for all gays that are known in this prison. W e ’ve tried, but sup port and outside attention needs to be forced on this situation because, as it stands, no thing can be done on the inside of the walls. Perhaps if enough influence from outside can be gotten, these people will be forced to change up. What Oregon State Administration prison system is doing is illegal and has to stopl!! (Ms Terri Marsh) Billy Grisel Box 41220 OSP 2605 State St. Salem, OR 97310 PS 1 Would like some feed back and support of our brothers 1 smile now!

Dear Beautiful Hot Men, Thank you for sending me the RFD magazine. It really helps lift up my spirit, plus unites me with other kindred fairy spirits. My burden sometimes is very heavy, be cause I long to be able to love freely those young boys who want and need my love. I am in prison because of the relation ship my young lover and I shared together. He was younger than fourteen. I was given five years for the courage we had of living as free as possible sharing our needs, our cares, our gifts. How long must it be before our fairy spirits can soar freely. May peace and love go out to all of you. I love you all. There is one thing that I would like to see more in your magazine} more about a Shaman and his relationship to young boys and men.

Danial G. Savickious P 0 Box #999 Reg. No. 45656 Canon City, CO 81212

Bruce Miller #103431 R t . 1, Box 260 Lexington, OK 7305* 15

LET US In this time of inflation in a proud but confused nation, let us open our minds and hearts to all our fellow men. A smile doesn't cost anything and one kind word can bring happinessi let us help one another along the way. Let us begin today in this time of self ishness and greed, in a time of growing need. Let us give unto others a little bit of our selves, take time to talk, to share, to under stand, to cheer someone with a pat on the hand. Let us love each other the best we c a m let us strive to always be free and let it all begin with me. Sincerely - write tot Earl Johnson C-72283 P 0 Box 87 Menard, IL 62259

I wish to respond to, at this time, a couple of item8/theme8 in recent RFD’s. Re garding the recent spate of letters, pro and con, over who should he able to receive RFD, I am reminded of Dear Abby's toilet peper letters. My initial reaction is one of indignation. Why would anyone who fights everyday to get or keep her/hiB rights as a human being, wish to deny me or anyone else their rights? I would ask, those of you who oppose free circulation (that is, without restriction), have you ever heard of such rights as a free press, free speech, a la 1st amendment? The hypocracy of a position such as that of curtailed readership is appalling (two p's even!), and smacks of the likes of dear anita's politics! I must also say, though, that the indig nation soon gives way to saddness. Why would those who would be my brothers desire to de prive me of the limited outside contact that I do have, bringing even greater isolation, simply becausei 1) I am currently in prison, un able to purchase a subscription! 2) I do not now live in the country j 3) Have had too little countryrural experience, and many years of city life? You may already be living and loving in the country, but there are many who either can't live there (i.e., because they are in prison), or because they cannot afford it (yet), or for whichever reason there may be. We are no less drawn to the beauty and love of the Mother Earth and her ways than are you! So, don't deny us one of the very few avenues we currently have of returning to her. We need, I need, RFD as much as you! The other theme to which I wish to respond is the Fairy Conference reported in the Winter Solstice issue (1979« No. 22). In the process of reorganizing my life (so that I can assure myself I'll not again put myself into the con trol of the state), I have been grappling with many personal identity issues. It has been necessary for me to come to terms with the fact of who 1 am, and its infinitely varying impact upon my life. How do I, a man who ackowLedges in all ways (now) that he is gay, live his life? In the last few months I have been start ing to explore (although somewhat timidly) the more spiritual aspect of my being, and the kinship of that spiritualism that is there for my brothers, sisters, and I. The many inter pretations of experience at the fairy con ference that I read bring home to me in great, force the importance of my exploration of spirit and identity. From them, I am able to interpret for myself what I desire for my life, and to formulate my own opinions and positions as a gay man, as a faerie, and as a human being with needs and feelings. It is not only these interpretations that are very important to me, but the personal manifestos and the faerie communication as well. I am very glad for having read them, and want to extend and share my love and gratitude with those who shared, in all manners, the spirit of the faeries with me in the RFD! May they watch over you, and leave their gentle touch with you!

Lonely gay in prison who had open heart surgery needs letters. Looking for pen pals on a true and honest long standing relation ship. I am 39 years young, 5 '8 " tall, brown hair, hazel eyes, at 155 lbs. Please send a stamp with each letter. Come on gays, bi's, straights or anyone! writei Ray (Ma) Barker #13910 P 0 Box 14, -9-6 Boise, Idaho 83707

I am a black prisoner. For five years my experience has been that (of) desolation and despair. I am seeking correspondence with someone I can share a meaningful constructive future with. Broad-minded, 25 years old, 5'8", 140 lbs. I prefer older mature person. Please write only if you're sincere. St. James Lattimore #143-103 P 0 Box 45699 Lucasville, OH 45699

I am in the Menard Psy. Center as a priso ner. I am doing 20 to 50 years for murder. I have been locked up for eight years now. I like all kinds of things. Base ball, football, fishing and hunting. I am a homosexual, but I also like women. I like music and movies. If you know anyone who would be interested in writing me, would you please give them my address. I only have about four or five years to go before I go before the parole board. I hope I make it. Well I guess I will close for now, but I hope to hear from you people real soon. Gerald Arthur Way C-00232 Menard Psy. Center Menard, IL 62259

Stever. (Chris) L&ndberg #K-100174-AC Box B St. Cloud, MN 56301 16

AFFIRMATION Recently, because I have been reorganiz ing my life, and committing myself to a new, gay personal and sexual identity, I felt it to be time for a new legal identity as well. And so I have changed my name. As a part of recognizing a new identity for myself, I have looked back on a life of craziness. A craziness wherein I gave up my rights and the power of my own life. I have given over, in the past, my rights to everyone whom I have allowed to step on me because I am gay, and doing so without confronting their bigotry. I have given over my power of my life to others by my action of past violence. That power was given over to the state of Minn esota, where I am now a prisoner. I have given over that power to my parents, who I would at one time act out violently for, in order to be recognized, wanted, let alone, loved. Throughout all of this, I have searched for something and someone to belong to, a different way to lead my life without all the fear of craziness, and the sadness and lonliness of rejection. Two years ago I found a solution in a small group of men. This group consisted of men in prison, but the exception here was that they would accept me for being me, and even love me. There were no judgements about gayness, no judgements of me as a human being. A first for me! These people cared enough that they would confront my craziness and yet not allow me to harm my self or others in any wayi they held me, and allowed me to cry away the many sadnesses of a lifetimet they held me and protected me when I was scared, and throughout it all, they loved me. I learned as they taught me many thingsi To love, and to let others love me, to care, to act out of reason and not hatred or impul siveness, to succeed in whatever I do, but not to shame or kick myself if I make mistakes. But the one thing they taught me that was the most surprising, was to love myself and to be proud of who I am, both as a gay man and as a human being. The surprise to me then was that none of them is gay, and all are prisoners. Because all of what these men have done for me when I was in need, and for all that I share with them now, I consider each of them to be the brothers of my real family. I have disowned my biological family. Because I am now in so many ways a differ ent person, one with a new identity, I have found it desirable to disown more than my old family and the craziness that they represent m so choosing, I read of the many parts in my past life. While I disown the past Christopher Street in New York has played in craziness, I will always remember it - so that the gay and human rights movement. The name I can be happier with who I am now. Thus, as came to symbolize to me in my mind a dedication a final, closing touch upon my past acting out, to everything I was looking for. lonliness, and so on, I choose a new name as And so I chose the name Christopher in representative of my future, a future of honor of the rights of' people, and especially reason, love and caring. gay people, and at the same time as a dedica In choosing my name, I decided it would be tion to the reclaiming of my rights and those good to look for something more than just a of others to live and love as equal beings. name that I would like (although that would be Christopher is my claim on my future, and the enough and be OK). I wanted a name to indicate future I will share with others - hopefully, ^ P^fde as a gay man, and at the same time be with full recognition of those rights for which a dedication to the principles I believe in I make my name now stand! the rights of all human beings, gay or other On 1 $ October 1979» the District Court of wise. Minneapolis, MN, granted my petition to change my name to Christopher Keith Phillips, effec tive upon my (as yet, uncertain) release' from prison. Until that time, I shall continue to be known by my past name though I live the identity of the new one. Steven D. (Chris) Lflndberg 17

What is the spiritual significance of being gay?

Dear RFDers, The following questions and answers were put together during this past winter and spring. Tim, the "medium", uses a ouija board while someone writes the answers. Both the ouija and Tim would like to contribute to RFD by answering any question but those of a spiritual/mystical nature will be answered most readily. I'm in cluding some of the many questions I've asked ouija for starters. This can be sort of a re gular happening! Tim suggests reading anything written by Alice Bailey - A Treatise on White N'agic, etc., or the occult in general will be helpful in clearing obscurities. Write your questions for ouija toi Snooky, 1^5-A East Kings Hwy, Shreveport, LA 71104. Include your return address. Selected questions and answers 1 How many gays are in the world? About 80# of all males have the capacity to relate sexually to other men and about 10# practice throughout life. Why doesn't everyone have the capacity? Their psychological make-up is so dutiful to the animal consciousness that the freedom of imagination required is not present.

I will try to explain about each of you. Snooky - He is experienceing in this life a transmuting of astral forces which have here tofore been very course. They are refining and a body of a more refined texture is needed. When a male uses a body of a degree of refine ment, the forces which are accumulated at the base of the spine and in the sexual center change in their magnetic pattern; as a conse quence the body as a semi-intelligent entity ceases to be drawn magnetically to the female body. All of this remains far below the thres hold of consciousness. If the psyche is respon sive to this change, and in this case it is, and had it not been so, the change would not take place as it is for the benefit of the psyche. Then a psychological pattern evolves from childhood in which members of the same sex are the attractive physically. Is heterosexuality the natural order of things? Heterosexuality is a response to natural laws of magnetism on the etheric levels. These laws are of little importance and as a man grows spiritually there may or may not be a time when he is not responsive to such laws as is his perogative. How do you read the past? The Akasha is a field of force in which all things past are recorded. The events of the past are always recorded at a much slower rate of vibration than what you experience now. This is due to the unfoldment of planetary Logos and its gradual progressive nature and is also related to the mystery of time which is an appearance caused by the spiralic movement of matter through space and the sympathy of the movement of the brain. It is burdensome for this reason to reach far into the past. Effects of the herbs comfrey and yarrow? Comfrey can be a mild purifier of the blood and is an aid to the kidneys. A tea made from yarrow can alter natural adrenal secre tion (as a stimulant).

MICKEY

-by Joseph Uher

the hall past the living room, Mary was bend足 ing over the stove. Her head bounced with the music, only a fraction of a beat behind, as she basted the tops of the loaves that were baking. They'd be ready in half an hour. As he moved towards the front steps he stopped and took in the view. Ail the way down the mountain and up the other side little leaf buds giggled in a high pitched chorus. The tree trunks were all but invisible now, and by the end of the week there would be no足 thing to 3ee but a blanket of fresh spring green. The forest stopped abruptly about three hundred feet from the porch. That was as much territory as Michael Sr. was willing to claim in his personal battle for civiliza足 tion. The lane ended in a pitiful excuse for a garage, separated from the house by enough room for a volleyball net. Michael Sr. had parked the pickup off the side of the dirt

He sat on the front porch. It was too warm to move. Occasionally, his stomach growlled and the spring air bathed him in memories of springs past. A squirrel landed on the roof, sending loose leaves and pebbles onto the ground. Somewhere in the valley, he heard the school bus grinding into first. It would be twenty minutes before the yellow box would wheeze over the peak at the bottom of their lane, exhausted from the climb. More out of habit than any other reason, he stood up, stretched and arched his back, and listened to four or five vertebrae crack and pop in protest. He shook himself vigorously, feeling the extra pounds of winter fat wobble like jello. "Got to get back in shape," he thought, al足 though he was not quite sure why. He hobbled over to the front door. In the kitchen, down 19

path. He had gone into town in the Camaro to purchase parts. The garage door was open and the bright sunlight picked up a bit of chrome left uncovered by the tarpaulin on Michael Jr.'s motorcycle. Mickey. Mary had been terrified when the purchase was made. There had been many loud arid long fights between her and Mike Sr., but Mickey's gentle ways usually settled all dif ferences. He remembered how the bike looked in the pickup, when Mike Sr. had... It was Indian summer then. The bus rumbled and complained as it made the first turn, its low growls bouncing off the walls of the valley like some neanderthal mon ster unfrozen last winter. He stretched again and padded softly down the steps. He had spent his whole life on this mountain, roaming the woods in his younger days or romping through fields of corn with Mickey and his friends. He stopped and looked up. He had sur prised himself with the thought of how con tent he had become to loll in the sun, or just give an occasional sniff around the edge of the forest. He kept to the familiar ity of the dirt lane. More memories pricked him, and he began to trot down the lane with a purpose.

sure and honor in sharing this secret with Mickey. This was not an adult place, this was a boy place. Special. And, Tim was a trust worthy partner in this special land. It had been since late September that he had been here. The day of the black box. Since then, he had gone up and down the lane in the morn ing and afternoon, except in the bitterest part of the winter. It was as if he had totally forgotten this place had ever been. He wondered if Tim had ever been back. Each morning when he left for school and each evening when he had returned, Tim had reso lutely ignored him. Only once, the day when school let out for Christmas vacation, had Tim gotten off the bus, and stood there in the snow until the bus had passed. They had looked at each other for a long while, had he thought that Tim was almost going to cross the road to him. But he just stood there, looking fright ening mad, and then a tear rolled down his cheek, just like Mary when she was upset, or when she was thinking about Mickey. Then Tim turned and ran up the lane. "I wonder if Tim's tears are salty," he thought. He looked quickly in both directions, just to make sure no one had snuck up on him. Then he started down the path. He knew it was a bit of a distance, well hidden from the lane itself, but his excitment was mounting, as he sought to fill this new need in himself. To understand. To feel. His breathing deepened, and the fresh air made him feel almost like a puppy again. The sight that met his eyes almost made his heart stop. It was at once familiar and alien. He stood at the end of the path in the tiny clearing which somehow seemed smaller than last time. The boards were still there, layed across two fallen tree trunks on either side of the tiny brook which burbled gayly underneath them. The two rock steps leading up were there. In this grotto, the spring buds had not yet formed that opaque wall which had made this place private. And there were birds nest ing in the roof. He sniffed around the edge of the clear ing. No one had been here. Certainly not the boxer. The run made him thirsty. He shuffled over to the brook and lapped some water. It was fresh and cold. A bullfrog, sitting on the opposite bank, leaped into the water and hus tled upstream under the riverhouse. It had frightened him. That damn ugly green thing had no right being in this place anyway. He let out an authoritative bark, but immediately thought better of it. What a puppy attitude, he thought. He felt ashamed, and*a little guilty. It was the first time he had ever let out anything louder than a playful yelp here, and even that had been silenced by Mickey and Tim, who were trying to stifle their own laughter. He looked around hurriedly to make sure no one was coming. He started back towards the path and stopped. He had come here for a purpose, and it would be very puppyish to turn tail and run for disturbing the spirits in this place. He looked back at riverhouse, and inside him, something snapped. He wanted to run home to Mary and Michael Sr. But he swallowed his heart and turned back towards his memories. The presence of history, all past and none for the future, enveloped him. As he climbed the rocks to this secret place, he thought he heard boyish laughter in the brook. He felt, or rather hoped, that if he turned quickly he might catch two naked bodies splash ing and gleaming in the sun. He caught his breath at their familiar scent. His imagina tion could not be that vivid. But no, it was

Behind him, he heard the door on the porch slam. Soon, Mary's warm call came sifting through the leafy buds like speckled sunlight. But he did not. turn back. He did not want hu man companionship. He did not want to feel her hand on his neck, massaging lovingly as she spoke about Mickey. She had tried to touch his innermost feelings. He could only look up with sympathetic eyes and wonder at this feminine strength. He knew her tears were salty. Something stronger called him now. For once, he did not respond to a human voice, but to that tiny one inside himself. He had been there. But he had not been conscious of it un til now. He had a question, and he had to know, to experience for himself this renaisance being prepared in the earth. A robin flitted across the lane and swooped up into a tree. It startled him. He had gone a quarter mile lost in thought. He was suddenly struck with the here and now. i’his forest. The way the light seemed to come from underneath. The bright patches of blue, warm in the late afternoon sky. The occasional grinding of distant gears. Once, last summer, when Mickey had gotten him over at Tim's, he had wandered down the lane onto the main road, tripping out on some wild scent. The driver of the car mustn't have seen him. He had jumped, all four legs at a time, sideways. And as quickly, the car was gone, as if it hadn't been. Only his rac ing heart and surging stomach were evidence of any such event. Times like that, he thought that he must have been a cat in a former life. Tim and Mickey ran down and threw their four arms around him. Then they went off to Mickey's garage. He lowered his head to the ground. One of the long crawly things had past recently. How he hated them. Further down the lane, that boxer from a home down the road had relieved himself. Damn him, why didn't he stay on his own turf. Humans just don't appreciate the responsibilities involved in looking after them. It felt good as he stretched his own leg. A few feet away, a dogwood was just starting to open its blossoms. He moved on, having reasserted his doghood. He almost trotted by it. The path was almost indistinguishable now. As a puppy, and even later In full doghood, he had felt plea 20

really there. On the edge of the boards, hanging just above the waterline, was his coat. Mickey's coat. He'd always worn it without a shirt, just to keep from getting scratched by the brambles that grew along the path. He walked over to the pitiful piece of denim. It was rough and scratchy, muddy from winter's use as nature tried to reclaim her own. He idly put a paw out and touched it. He pulled it back from the edge of the plat form. Then* without knowing why or what he was doing, he buried his nose in it, searching for some trace of the boy he had loved. It was there, with many other smells, Taint and overpowered by earth and mould was Mickey's warmth. He was shaking. He licked his lips, and to his amazement he tasted salt. He was crying, crying real dog tears. He had cried once beforet when Mickey had taken him to bed that first night as a puppy in a new home.

where he saw Mickey, lying in Tim's arms, shak ing and crying. He crawled up the steps and over to where the two boys were holding each other. Tim was gently stroking Mickey, trying to calm him. There were tears in Tim's eyes too, but he held them back. Mickey's rolled freely down his cheeks. He went over to Mick ey and licked his lover's face. The tears were salty. A harsh grinding of gears brought him to his feet. The sun was low in the sky. It was late, and he had missed the school bus. Missed it for the first time since September. He jumped off of riverhouse and raced towards the path. Then he stopped and looked back. The jacket lay there in the center of the platform. Something pulled at his heart. He went back and picked up the jacket. He carried it to a young maple tree, growing just on the edge of the clearing. He started scooping dirt with his paws. The feel of the earth was good between his toes. It reminded him of puppy days and bury ing bones. When it was deep enough, he picked up the jacket and dropped It gently into the hole. He stood there for a moment, looking at it, thoughtfully. He rearranged it just a touch, and turned around to cover it with dirt. A shock ran through him. There, at the end of the path, looking directly at him, was Tin. They stood looking at each other for quite a while. He was not; sure what his one-time friend would do. You could generally count on a human's consistency, but lie realized how much they both had changed this past winter. He took a step forward. Tim's face broke into a half-smile, then a full-fledged grin. "How'r'ya doin? Long time, no see, eh, boy?" Almost involuntarily, he felt his tail start to wag, faster and faster. Soon they were both sitting on tha steps to riverhouse, an arm over a leg, a hand across a shoulder. "You know, I haven't been back here since ...ya know, since Mickey...since they...?" They sat for a moment in silence. He shifted his head onto Tim's lap. He felt com fortable with the old, familiar smell. "You know, when you were't at the bus to day, I thought something had happened. I was afraid maybe you were...like Mickey, you know? It was the first time you weren't there at the bus, and I kind of...This place has changed, hasn't it? Just doesn't seem the same without him. Ya know, I've thought about coming back here, but I just never...somehow it wouldn't have seemed right...Hey, ya know something? I got a new friend!...Yeah, couple weeks ago, it was just...Well, it wasn't the same as Mickey.. But I've been so lonesome, and...What the fuck am I sitting here talking to a dog for? Hey boy, come on, let's head up to the house and see what Mary's got on the stove. You want to go see Mary? I haven't seen her and Mike Sr. all winter." The two of them stood up, both a winter older and started up the path. As they reached the end of the lane, there was Mike Sr. He closed up the back door of the pickup and walk ed into the house. "Gosh, he's getting rid of Mickey's motor cycle. I wonder if he'd sell it to me?" He broke into a run, just like springs past, racing Tim to the front steps of the house. He always won, even after running a few wide circles around the boy, just for fun. Tim bounded up the front steps and through the door into the living room, slamming the door behind him. He scratched and scratched at the door, but he could never get his paw into the crack to open it. Just like a human, he thought. (continued on page 24)

He lost all consciousness but the smell of Mickey and the taste of salt. He sank down onto the jacket to roll in the pain and the pleasure of the memories. Mickey had worn the jacket the night before... He remembered the way the moon had glis tened on Mickey's shoulders as he had strip ped the jacket off while running down the path. He had gone back himself to retrieve it, know ing it was against the rules to leave any evidence of who might inhabit this place. Tim was standing in riverhouse, his re flection broken in the pool below. Standing in his shorts, already in love. Mickey was kiss ing his neck and chest and shoulders, running his hands over Tim's thigh3. He stood there, the jacket in his mouth, waiting for permission to enter. Soon, both boys were naked, rolling over the platform. At one point, Tim had pinned his friend over the edge, Mickey's long hair almost touching the water. They had both broken up in laughter and sat up, when they finally noticed him. It was then that he was happiest, when he could enter into this secret place without adults with their "No! Bad dog!" Then he could scamper up the steps and join in the tussle, always being careful not to bark too loudly. Arms, legs and fur would fly. He raced down the steps for the jacket and raced back up, sure of a good tug of war. He against the two boys, he and Mickey against Tim, he and Tim against Mickey. At one point, the two boys picked him up and dropped him gently into the brook. He had had justice by shaking himself thoroughly dry back in riverhouse. When the play was over, at a signal, he would sit at the base of the steps on guard. Occasionally he would turn at the sound of a moan and catch a smile on each of their faces. But he knew his job. When all was quiet again, only the whisper of deep breath mingling with the water sounds below, could he rest, but al ways with one ear cocked. That night. That night. He started to shake again. He thought of how beautiful the boys were and how he wished he had someone of his own kind there to share these feelings. He thought of the boxer in the valley. What would it be like if they were friends? Would they chase birds together? Would they fight over bones? Would they nip at each others' throats, running through the fields, crashing through the woods? Crashing through the woods? He woke up with a start. He had fallen asleep on duty. Something large, larger than a dog was crashing through the woods. It was al ready at a distance up on the lane and heading towards the house where Mary and Michael Sr. were asleep. He turned towards riverhouse 21

[

May I Propose A Toast ? Encoded Empathy Throw it. Throw it out. Throw it over. CVER throw it. Flip me over. Wipe me out. Over easy. Over the rainbow. Over a barrel. A barrelling chest. A hope chest. A bright and shining hope. The Great White Hope :

Predestined lovers Of beauty, Our genes carry Sweetness Carry peace Through fractured time We are a harmony A colored tone -We speak pastels A vocabulary of senses Blankets cover us As we walk Disguises of moon Or evening Venus On the rise Hiding our beautiful Auras We glow beyond Our shadows Beyond our wishes.

G r o w -- UPPP1 Grow out of it . Grow tired of it. Grow organic carrots. Get the point? Get out . Get a little. Get a lot. Get a horse. Get a job. Get Laid. Laid Get . Laid Getting. Laid Getting There. When and if you get there, Come here. Fall away. Fall in grace. Fall into spring. Fall away from the church. Fall in stature. Fall: in a scenic environment. Humpty Duropty, Keep On Having The Great Fall. Cause all the king's horses And all the king's best ones Fell -- just as you have But do not know it. Now, may I ?? Mother, may I Propose A Toast ? To giant steps and the games we play Trying for the butter, But mostly for the toast. n

Michael Mason

Life

Sunseri_____ (

Bricks and Stones Little by little, Stone by stone, Building your wall, alone, alone.... A wall to crawl behind and hide, Let no one but you inside.... Little by little, stone at a time, Brick by brick, laid in a line... Trying to keep all love away, Secure in your own lonely way...

But love seeps through, around, between, Over and under, a force unseen, You cannot keep love locked outside, Its force is greater than the tide...

1 do not ask to give you all the love

David

might have to offer

Truly given, though unreturned, It knows no debts, it can't be earned, Love will have its way in time, There is nothing you cai hide behind.

nor do I seek to make it all one grand sweetness. All I ask is

Tear down your wall of bricks and stones, And you will never have to be alone. Just as the river must flow to the sea, You can't lock up our love, it must be free.

to meet the smile in your eyes with an equal one in mine. Steve

Daniel Savickious 0-------------------------0

Garman

WHERE TO FIND JACK SPICER Where What friendship is called Loses its bras and underwear Outside of Art City And the standard definitions of beauty Where there is no good excuse For stupidity, just the edge of This country we live in Dictated to by the aliens In it, this dusty road Dusty all summer long. Beniaroin Sloan 0----- i------------ 0

roe. David Sunseri 0--- -------------

-O THIS RACE I grow tired of this race To rest only a space On summer’s peak Before rushing down fall's short slope Into the long winter valley

Mr. Sequin His long legs lounging languidly His smooth white hand grazing the sofa back curvedly The smoke twists and turns in ribbons upwardly His thin fingers Advancing

(Where, when it rains, My shoes make weeping sounds On faded sidewalks All the shoes of the bent runners Weeping The cold, deadly beads Stinging as we run for spring)

This clear white light illuminates the skin tight velvet With a blue irridescent sheen Softly into shadows plunging Softer than the sofa cushioning Softer even than the smoke Softer still is the skin beneath

But to slack the pace we have all heard The white-haired wailing Behind us Turned to see the puckered lips of earth Swallow them down Goading us Up the face of another year

His lithe limbs moving deliberately The velvet seeming straining Who will be the first to tell? The blue ribbons of smoke undulating upwardly His soft smooth fingers Lingering

(I have heard men scream I have screamed myself At flowers slipping by Sounds of summer Light of autumn Echoes of winter Slipping past)

Steve Thorning 0------------------------ 0

Hollywood shadowed gardens close around us into a darkness which permeates as a fairy speaks of being a star Bill Matthis ----------------- — 0

To lie down But not in earth To pause But not fall behind For behind this tree Around this turn Over this rise Maybe the finish (And will the cheering go on forever?)

O 23

Len

Haves

•o

"Hi Mary, how are ya doin? Long time, no see, eh?" "Well, Timmy? Timmy! How are you? Aren't you growing into a handsome man? Turn around. Let me see you. Oh, you look so fine." A shadow fell across the hall from the kitchen. There, in the light stood Mike Sr. "Mary, you gonna come in here and eat, or you gonna let this food get cold?" "Mike? Michael? Set another place at the table, we got a visitor!" "What? Who's here? Oh..." Michael stood in the door of the living room. "What the hell do you want? What the hell are you doing here?" Mary got up from the armchair where she had been sitting and ran across the room to where Michael Sr. stood. "Michael, now you stop that. After all this boy's been through? And you're gonna make it even harder for him to..." "Mary, this is my house, and what I say goes. I do not want no faggots in this house. I do not want no faggots in this house, ever. My son was...one of them, just like this one here. I only hope, and say my prayers each night, that the Lord has had mercy on little Mickey's soul and ain't letting him burn in hell...Not too deep any ways." "Michael! Don’t talk like that." "Mary, you are a woman, and you wouldn't understand these things. You wouldn’t under stand how disgustin' It is for a man to see another man, what's supposed to be another man, what passes for another man, his own flesh and blood, doin' queer things like what this one done with my son." "Michael, they're both kids. Kids do that, don't you understand? I was his mother, and I will not believe that my son was doin' anything sinful or had any evil intentions in his heart. Now I don’t know Timmy here as well, but I don't believe he had any evil in tentions either." "I know the Lord don't blame me for what Michael Jr. did. But I know He won't tolerate either this instrument of the devil standing in ray living room." "Michael, it's just a phase they..." "It ain't no phase, Mary. Don't give me none of that psychological crap. This boy likes it. He likes it. He likes sucking a man's cock and putting his cock up another man's ass." "Michael, don't talk like that." "It's what they do!" "It isn't a phase." They both looked at Tim in shock. They had become so involved in their argument, that they had forgotten Tim was still standing there. He grew redder and redder until he could not hold it in any long er. And now tears were running down his face. "What did you say, boy?" and "Timmy!" escaped almost simultaneously from the adults' mouths. "I said it isn't a phase, Mary-. Michael Sr. is right. I like it. And I'm still doing it, because there isn't anything wrong in doing it. And Mickey liked it, too. Your son and I loved..." "Get the hell out of my house before I blow your goddamn balls off with my shot gun, you goddamn stinking..." The front door had slammed and Tim was half-way across the lawn before the word "faggot." He sat there in the moon light, thinking. The house had been quiet for over an hour. The lights were out. The humans were asleep. He was thinking about the jacket, and how he hadn't quite finished what he had set out to do.

He got up and slid quietly down the stairs and across the lawn to the lane. When he reached the path, he turned off and picked up his pace, excited, almost happy. It would be the one act left that would let him show his love for Mickey, and leave him free to go on about this business of living. When he reached the clearing, he thought for a minute that he must have taken a wrong turn in the dark. He sniffed around, but, no, he could smell it. This was the place, this was the tree. Maybe he had forgotten, gotten it all confused. He could not keep things in his head straight, as the searing sounds of Michael Sr. came back in the night. The human smell that was not playful, bur serious and dangerous. What was it in the air here? It was very familiar, but he could not...could not...It could not be! It was the sound...of breathing. His mind was playing tricks on him. For a moment he was very scared. Afraid that he was loosing his senses. It could only be the wind. He moved back towards riverhouse. There on the platform, above the water rippling peacefully over rocks and new spring moss, was Tim. His arms were thrown across the chest of another boy, a boy he did not know. Across them both, to keep the warm in the cool spring night, was Mickey's jacket. He climed the stairs, lay down, and rested his head on his arms. He kept one ear cocked.

Copyright 1980 All rights of reproduction, publication, trans lation into foreign languages and other media belong to the author. For further information, apply to 32 S. Prince St. #6, Lancaster, PA 17603 24

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By 'Don 'K.dficfn&r

At this point it is easier to Btate who Gay people are not - we are not "homosexuals." The concept of a ‘‘homosexual" is a modern, western phenomena. In 1869 a male physician first coined the word to define a person by sexual attraction toward another person of the same biological gender. Since then HeteroMale Culture has used this concept to control Gay people not only on the physical but on the mental and spiritual levels of our being as well. It is essential to recognize that this Hetero-created "Myth of the Homosexual" is just that - a myth. But like all social myth structures, it has painfully shaped and con trolled our unfoldmen.t as a people during the past century as we internalized its negative implications of perversity and effeminancy. But the myth remains Hetero-defined, neverless • Today, regardless of the Gay Movement's socio-political rhetoric, "Homosexual" and "Gay" are virtually synonymous (for a brief period between 1970 and 1973 this was not true). No matter how liberated and progressive our self-image as Gay men might be, most of us still lead our lives within the matrix of the "Myth of the Homosexual," albeit on subtle levels sometimes. Our so-called "Gay Identity" is still largely Hetero-male derived and de fined. For example, the plethora of conferen ces in recent years aimed at "Developing A Positive Gay Identity," are really aimed at learning more positive ways of coping with the "Homosexual Myth" structure In which we still find ourselves enmeshed. They have very little to do with discovering our true-self identity as a people. Our minds have been colonized well. When we try to share with our dominant society just who we think we are as Gay people, we find ourselves simply feeding back to them permutated difinitions of the sexual orienta tion myth they originally fed to us. This pro cess, of course, is not unique to Gay men. Mary Daly's recent Gvn/Ecology provides a brilliant analysis of a similar predicament in relation to the emergence of a truly womancentered identity for women.

This article is about an increasingly critical, but virtually ignored, dilemma facing Gay people - our assimilation into the main stream versus our enspiritment as a people. It represents a topic that the current leadership of the Gay community, for reasons of class self-interest or a newly acquired sense of identity, refuses to address. I am talking about nothing less than re-inventing ourselves as Gay people. For most Gay men - and I feel qualified to speak only of Gay men - the idea, much less the exploration, of Gay-centered and defined Spir it-Politics-Healing is a new one. It is full of Revelation-Revolution.

'\0fio cure we ? / * < * 'VOfiere c(o we come from ? *

JK C ritLcaC C ro s s ro a d

J\ssLm iC atlon

Radical (faerie Dust

'Wfiat are wef o r ?

A valuable "start here" place is examining carefully the three basic questions put for ward to Gay people in the early 50 *8 by the * original Mattachine Society* "Who are we?", "Where do we come from?", and "What are we ■ for?" The search for the answers to these . questions is even more relevant today to the existential reality and well-being of Gay . people than when they were first advanced thirty years ago. Only now do we have the breathing space to begin dealing with them.

♦

The past decades of Gay activism have given us a little breathing space. Survival is no longer our sole concern. This has placed Gay men at a critical juncture in our process of true-self discovery outside the "Myth of the Homosexual." This new matrix has major impli cations for our future evolvement as a people and for the re-visioning of our Movement as a self-defined Movement. At the metaphorical "fork in the road" where we find ourselveB, I refer to one path as "Gay Assimilation." It is based on the positive "Myth of the Homosexual," a largely unexamined, underlying assumption thati "We're no different from anybody else except for what we do in bed." Other than our choice of sex partners, we're just like Heterosexuals. For the "Gay Assimilationists" civil rights and acceptance by Heterosexuals are pan aceas. Personal identities and life plans are based on Heterosexual models of respectability and upward class mobility. Straight, Caucasian physical attributes and behaviour are emulated. For the "Gay Assimilationist," political success means Gay people becoming as power-oriented, manipulative, and competitive as Hetero men in playing the game of electoral politics. Their chant could easily bei "Two-Four-Six-Eight, How Many Votes Have We Bought To Date." At present the Gay Movement and media are dominated by "Gay Assimilationists." As a result, what passes for "Gay" poli tics, "Gay" psychology, etc., is really little more than Hetero-male evolved politics, religion, and psychology, etc., with the word "Gay" mindlessly or opportunistically prefixed. So-called "Gay" churches and synagogues are based largely on the same structures, values and consciousness as their patriarchal proto types. A "Gay" bagman for the Democrat or Republican Party is indistlnquishable from his Straight counterpart. At the base level, what passes for "Gay" therapy differs little from what Heterosexual therapists do. Afterall, if we really are just like they are, why shouldn't Gays become a mirror imitation of Heterosexual society? When I'm around "Gay Assimilationists" I often feel like I'm associating with Straight men, and I'm reminded of Gay author James Baldwin's warning that when a minority group attempts to assimilate, it always does so totally on the terms of the dominant culture. And Gay men are being accepted by Hetero Cul ture to the extent that they look, behave and think just like Straight men, in the process becoming a de-spirited people. Blacks have their "oreos" (Black on the outside, White on the inside). Someone in my most recent "Gay Voices and Visions" group sug gested the appelation "Wax Fruit" to describe similarity accuiturated individuals among Gays. In any case, I frequently come away from my interactions with "Gay Assimilationists" feel ing spiritually raped. At the metaphoricaL "fork in the road" where we now find ourselves, an alternative possibility is available to us as Gay men. I refer to it as the path of "Gay Enspiritment." It is less well surveyed at this point but, across the country, this alternative is in creasingly being explored by a new generation of Gay men, many of whom had ventured down the "Gay Assimilation" road, only to find the price too high for their souls. This other possibility says that there is a reality to being Gay that is radically dif ferent from being Straight (notei different, not better or worse). It is real. We can feel it in our hearts and in our guts. And it has nothing to do with Hetero mythologies, either negative or positive, about what it means to be Gay.

People coming out of a cultural tradition different from our own have ackowledged this difference. The Anthropological literature is full of examples. For instance, the^tradition al Crow Indians used the concept bote to de scribe us - "notMan/notWoman but Other." Young children also see the difference. Recently I overheard my three year old friend Heather ad monishing her pre-school classmates» "Don is not a mant " . As Gay men continue to reclaim our cultur al history outside of the "Myth of the Homosex ual," we are discovering a rich historical lineage pointing toward the current emergence of Gay Consciousness. During the past century * this "Gay Spirit" has been identified, nurtured, deepened, and passed on by an incredible line of Gay mystics and visionaries - Walt. Whitman, Ed ward Carpenter, Gerald Heard, Harry Hay and Mitch Walker, to mention one such lineage.

Walt Whitman (1819-1892), the poet of America, is particularly central to the emer gence of Gay Consciousness. By contrasting individuals as being either of an "adhesive" (Gay) or "amative" (Hetero) nature, for the first time in recorded history Whitman’s Leaves of Grass defined us as a people with a particu lar vision and spiritual essence, and not sole ly as a sexual act. For Gay men of that time there was an immediate, deep spirit connection with Whitman's visionary poetry which has con tinued undiminished to the present day. Profoundly influenced by Whitman, noted British Socialist Edward Carpenter (1844-1929) enlarged Whitman's opening even further with his pioneering writings about the "Intermed iate Type" (Gays). Specially significant was his research into the important role Gay peo ple have played traditionally in non-western cultures throughout the world - shamans, heal ers, priests, magic makers, mediators, seers, and innovators in the arts and crafts. Carpenter’s far-reaching observations about the unique functional roles of Gay people in society have recently been reiterated and enlarged upon by Harvard's E.O. Wilson, the founder of the new academic field of Socio biology. In his On Human Nature, Wilson concludesi "There is...a strong possibility that homosexuality is a distinctive beneficient be havior that evolved as an important element of early human social organization. Homosexuals may be the genetic carriers of some of man kind's more altruistic impulses."

* * *

* A

* Companions Harry Hay and John Burnside f* have done important break-through work in Gay Consciousness by reclaiming a Fairy archetype *t * to probe at the mystery. At last year's sem^ * inal "Spiritual Gathering for Radical Fairies," over 200 Gay men from all over North America H *-» found their way to a remote spot in the Arizona 4 desert to experience a brief taste of true-self * identity. Hay invited his Gay brothers "to * * tear off the ugly green frog-skin of Heteror * Male imitation to reveal the beautiful Fairy * Prince hidden beneath." * t Hay is a singularly pivotal figure in the growth of the Gay Movement in this country. %¥* Moving out into new dimensions of Gay Spirit uality, Hay calls upon all people to recognize . ¥ + that there is a qualitative difference between Gay Consciousness and Hetero Consciousness. * * Gay people have a different window on the world, our own way of seeing, our own vision. This * difference in essential vision Hay has called * "subject-subject" consciousness in contrast to t the "subject-object" consciousness of the Hetero-Male Culture around us. Gay men have a unique potential within them to experience nature and other beings not as "objects" to be manipulated and mastered, but as "subjects," like themselves, to be re spected and cherished. Thinking in terms of opportunism, power, competitiveness and self advantage arises out of a "subject-object" con sciousness. The gift of "subject-subject" relationships is equal-sharing and lovinghealing. For a long time Gays have been trying to minimize our differences from Heteros as an act of survival. But now, for the first time in history, Hay is urging Gay people to begin maximizing our differences from Straights as an act of love - to ourselves and to them. Maximizing our differences does not mean "us" vs. "them." It is not a call for "Gay Separatism" or elitist groupings. It does mean, however, that Gay people must begin a radical new process of self-discovery that starts with what is Inside of us, we must begin to discover who we really are, and we must be gin inventing a language capable of revealing these essential differences to our dominant culture. In the process, we will become a mirror that will allow Heteros to see them selves and their culture in ways heretofore unavailable to them. At a time when HeteroMale Culture has become lethal to the contin ued survival of our species and other beings on this planet, what greater act of loving-kind ness could Gay people perform. This is a con tribution Gays have been making all along. Now, however, there is the potential for doing our dharmic dance with a level of awareness and compassion never before available to either Gays or Straights. My evocation to Gay people, as they march in Gay Pride, isi keep on marching. Just keep stepping out, and out, and out... Outside the "Myth of the Homosexual." Beyond the bland imitation of "Gay Assimilation." Learning to honor, not hide, our being different. Affirming and celebrating our Gay ness in original and playful ways. Acknowledg ing a rich hidden heritage. Finding new models to explain the body of information and intui tive knowledge we have been carrying for a long time, but which had no way to get out. A new wave in Gay Liberation is forming. In deep and profound ways, none of us has really "come out" yet. * * * * * * * This love note to Gay men was written during the Summer Solstice in honor of the June 22, 1980, Gay Pride celebration in Los Angeles.

Gerald Heard (1890-1971), a long time re sident of Santa Monica, was a prolific author, anthropologist, philosopher of history, BBC commentator on science, Vedantist and sciencefiction writer in addition to being a consider able personal influence on many of the outstand ing British intellectuals of his day. For the first time, Heard began to deal with our differ ence - our "otherness" - as Gay people (he called us "isophyls") within the context of evolutionary biology. He felt it was Gay peo ple within the human species who best represent ed the biological concept of neoteny - "pro longed youth." Our neotenous nature allows Gay people to be open and growing and mobile and exploring long after our Heterosexual age peers have been forced to "settle down" into the specialization and stability required of parent hood and so-called maturity. It is because of our neotenous non-specialization, Heard con tended, that Gay people have been able to make such a rich contribution to human culture. Heard was the precursor to the innovative work now being done by Human Ethnologist Dr. Charlotte Bach who lectures at London Universi ty. One of the lessons of the history of science, as Bach recognizes, is that getting the Right Answer is often a matter of asking the Right Question. She asksi "Why are there ’Gays' at all?" and "Why hasn't evolution eliminated 'Gayness' millions of years ago?" Like Heard, she says the answer is simple Gayness is an indispensable evolutionary factor in our species. Where Heard uses the concept "neoteny" to characterize Gay people, Bach uses the term "sexually ambigous" in her scientific publica tions. Using an evolutionary emergent model for our species, Bach feels it is the Hetero sexual majority that provides the stable, gen erally conservative, base that is necessary for our species' on-going survival while it is the "sexually ambiguous" minority (Gays) that pro vides for the evolutionarily significant be havior changes that in due course trigger off evolutionarily significant anatomical changes. In Bach's viewi "Gay people are needed to the survival of our species as much as socalled 'Straight' people. 'Gays’ and 'Straights,' far from being opposed ends of a polarity, are complimentary constituents of a unity, namely, the unity of the human species." This helps to explain why Gayness has al ways survived and our persecutors have always gone down the drain of history. Whitman, Carpenter and Heard, among others, wondrously blazed the trail of "Gay Enspiritment," and today that work continues by a new generation of Gay men following in their footsteps. This path involves completely re defining ourselves, our history and our culture outside of the "Myth of the Homosexual" and beyond "Gay Assimilation." Gay men still do not have an adequate language to describe much of this paradigm shift in consciousness, but from all over the land there is significant movement in that direction. Historian Arthur Evans recently provided a major revisionist approach to Gay historiography with his daring book Witchcraft and the Gay Counterculture, subtitled A Radical /iew of Western Civilization and Some of the People It Has Tried to Destroy." In his The Night Su n . San Francisco poet Aaron Shurin sings new possibilities for Gay men in his healing chants. Gay shaman Mitch Walker, in his newest publication, Visionary Love, has guided us much further down this path of Gay Enspirit ment by inventing concepts and terminology more in keeping with the way Gay men see and feel and move in the world. 27

•

S C VIC

W ln5 s

o f

V erse by {Jim

My Wings Unfold

WATER FAIRIES

My wings unfold As I shake away cocoon remnants Gaining strength from new air, Energy from lives of blooming things.

THE MOON FLOATED HIGH IN THE MIDNIGHT SKY WHILE BRITCHES OF FAIRIES WAVED IN LIMBS AS THEY SWAM

My eyes open to see Gathered, fairy brothers Circled Arms entwined, combined. Your joy tears shed on me and my birth, Moistens my soul whole.

THE CRYSTAL BLUE WATER WITH WAVES LAPPING SHORE REFLECTING THEIR SMILES AND THE CLOTHES THAT THEY WORE.

Unfolding I stand Unsteady Growing stronger As you breathe Majic breath on me. A death a birth Awake in a sea Of loving men. I discover My unfolding self Made free. Thanking you now, A fairy is free. 0â&#x20AC;&#x201D; ----------- 0 RISE UP, OH FAIRY BROTHERSl Great gusts of fairy dust Arise in clouds of strength. Our brothers are held captive By straighter men than we. Men who hide behind welcome masks Concealing fearful hatreds. Come, my fairy brothers, Let your wings take flight Gaining strength from our brother Wind Rise upl Guide yourself By star and sea. As our numbers grow, So grows ignorance. They set to destroy The lovers of men. Knowledge can destroy ignorance. Loving each person unconditionally Is a beginning for us each. The goal is having that love in return. Be respectful and careful in their world. Don't tread heavily on their sand Be of good faith; remember the struggle. Set example strong and good Win with love and fairy wing Spread the majic fairy dust Chant the chants we've known so long But were afraid or forgot to use... Rise up oh fairy brothers, Unite*.

WITH KISSES AND GIGGLES AND FEELIES DOWN DEEP DRIFTING ON WILDFLOWERS SINGING SCENTS IN THEIR SLEEP. I LAY WITH MY FAIRY AFLOAT IN THE WIND HEARD HIS KIND VOICE, KNEW HIM WITHIN I DRIFT OFF TO SLEEP NOW FAIRY RINGS IN MY MIND WITH THOUGHTS OF THE FAIRY WITH THE BEAUTIFUL SKIN.

Jo u a rd ike New ^ fro n tiers O f f a i r y V ision .... subject-SU B JE C T Consciousness by f f a r r y ( j f e n r y ) f i a i f followed - after throwing us Radicals out - re jected the proposition that T O Y were responsible for the Gay Street People. And the issue was still being debated two decades later. The third concept for which FIRST MATTACHINE was responsible was our introduction of the word H0M0PHILE into the American vocabulary - the most misunderstood, perhaps, of all actions FIRST MATTACHINE under took. But we must recall that - certainly from

A prospectus for Homosexual Rights Organiz ation which I developed and presented to various people in August of 1948, and revised as of July 1950, noted "an encroaching American Fascism which seeks to bend unorganized and unpopular minorities into isolated fragments". The full significance, I felt, of Senator Joe McCarthy 's onslaught against Gays in Federal Civil Service (such as in the State Department), beginning in 1948, lay "in the legal establishment of a type of GUILT BY ASSOCIATION which the accused could not disprove". (how do you prove that you are not what you are not?). We should remind our selves that it was against jus t such jeopardies that the bulwark of the Fifth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution was erected. It was my pos ition then, in 1948 and in 1950, that if the Government succeeded in isolating and attacking the Homosexual Minority, it would create a wea pon which "could be employed as a threat against any and every man and woman in our country to insure thought control and guarantee political regimentation". Though that potential was tem porarily defeated in California i_n November of 1978 by the electoral landslide against the Briggs' Initiative, Proposition #6, that very 'Guilt By Association" Threat still hovers on the political horizons of many other States be devilled by well-organized Right-Wing Single issue Crusaders. The fact that this issue still dogs our footsteps 30^ years later tells us how short a distance, in some respects, our beloved Gay Movement has travelled . . . and, perhaps, even in the wr ong direct ion! Though my original FIRST MATTACHINE Society proved to be a glowing dream of short duration, it did enter into motion a number of significant concepts. To begin with, we launched the first effective Gay Movement in the United States which - Through its initial offshoot, CNE INC., - has continued uninterruptedly right down to the pre sent time. Conceptually - we suggested, for in stance, that Homosexuals were an oppressed cul tural Minority: so self-evident is that concept today that listeners might be quite surprised to learn that it took two-and-a-half years of im passioned pleading on the writer's part before First Mattachine as a body agreed to adopt it (of course, our process of operating by unanimity was slower than the "consensus" modification, recommended by the writer to the newly unfolding Gay Liberation Front in December of 1969, proved to be). we also suggested that all Gay People were responsible for each other - from street People on the one hand to the most closeted of Professionals on the other: FIRST MATTACHINE accepted that proposition without difficulty, but the Second ("Respectable" "we're exactly the same as e verybody-else1') Mattachine Society which

when ihe word Jiomosexual was Jirst coined wc (gays were N O Tpeople.,,, we were merely &criminal ACT,,. the 1870s forward, when the word Homosexual was first coined - we Gays were NOT people . . . . . we were merely a_ crimina 1 ACT: we were - in fact - dangerous non-persons characterized only by a^ CRIMINAL ACT! Defining ourselves to the Media as Horaophiles laid the basis for introducing Gayness as a legitimate behavior-systern into the mainstream of American perceptions. To begin with, since nobody knew the term Homophile, they had to ask us what it meant. And that, in turn, granted us the platform from which, AT LONG LAST, we might define ourselves a^ persons .......... FOR THE FIRST TIME IN CHRISTIAN HISTORY. From 1958 on, when we were beginning to be seen - in a variety of circumstances - as persons . . . . albeit sick persons in psychiatric terms, the Gay Movement had carved out for itself a U. S. Supreme Court Decision permitting not only Gayeducative materials but Heterosexual sexuallyeducative materials to be disseminated through the mails: we had begun to debate the positive contributions of the Gay Movement along the per iphery of the American Main-stream. By 1966 a number of us had appeared openly AS GAYS on doz ens of Radio programs and TV shows, we had openly participated as Gays in massive Anti-War demon strations: on the West Coast we had openly dis cussed the positive aspects of the Gay Life-style on picket-lines and in street-demonstrat ions and in Renaissance Pleasure Faire operations and in Street Peoples' side-walk Forums from San Diego to Berkeley. Though the Movement is still badly informed on this matter, when Christopher Street exploded - in June of 1969 - there had 'already 29

as Pavlov, '®tson, McDougall, and - currentlySkinner . But in the years between 1967 and 1977, when Ethology itself began evolving from a sing le discipline of Enquiry into a whole series of multiple fields of disciplined Enquiries (among which being Socio-Biology), large blocks of in formation - directly bearing upon us as potent ially a sub-species all our own - have begun to become evident. A recent "flash-on" of such evidence might be the insight that it is the dogged persistence by which Masters & Johnson continue to ask the "WRONG QUESTIONS" which man ages so successfully to disguise the totally unscientific nature of their Pursuit. '•’ere their position that, given the present state of their research arts, they can produce no evid ence to show that Homosexuality (or, for that matter, Heterosexuality) is genetically deter mined truly a reflection of scientific obser vation -- as they claim -- it would reouire to be followed in sequence by the obvious admis sion that they can equally produce no evidence to show that Homosexua1 ity (or, for that matter, Heterosexuality) i_s^ NOT genet ica 11 y deter minedl

been a huge and wide-ranging powder train care fully and painfully laid . . . all ready to take off across the country. But perhaps the most important contribution of FIRST MATTACHINE's Golden Dream is one that, up to now, has seldom been perceived. In the almost thirty years since FIRST MATTACHINE began to call Gay People to the struggle to develop. Gay Consciousness, the Movement created around itself a free-space, a fire-break if you will, a discontinuity between itself and the everoppressing ever-invading Hetero-male Conglomerate of Domination-and-Submission Games we call Soci ety. within that discontinuity we were able to create a breathing-space wherein Gay People could take time out to examine themselves and each other AS GAY PEOPLE . . . Gay People could actu ally assess themselves and each other . . .assess themselves POSIT IVE L Y ........ assess them selves POSITIVELY and find each other GOOD! And all of this - for the very first time EVER in Human His tory!

Qaci People could...

Some of us have begun to flow with this mater ial. In February of 1970, the writer proposed that Gay People have their own particular Gay Window on the world (see the May/June 1970 issue of D O B ’s journal THE LADDER): in February of 1972 (in a letter to LA’s GCSC) I suggested that perhaps the perticular "Other" (not better - o r - worse...but certainly OTHER) values and perspectives we oerceive through our Gay windows should be referred to as ’GAY" Consc iousness. In 1976, in a Position Paper intended for RFD, I ecplored some new and unexpected dimensions I had discovered in that Consciousness....but in 1976 such ideas were found to be incomprehen sible. Only in the summer of 1978 would a won derful brother from the West Coast reach out to that Position Paper and say "Hey’ . I dig’ ."

...assess themselves POSITIVELY and find etch other good l However it is equally true that we all knew that FIRST MATTACHINE's Golden Dream of develop ing itself into a constructively-functioning net work of supportive Families for all of us, from which we each could share our particular creative contributions with the Hetero Parent Society in coroon?ative safety ........ we knew that bring ing this Golden Dream to reality hinged upon our being able to grapple with - and eventually ans wer three key questions: 1) Who are we Gay People? 2) Where do we come from, in History and Anthro pology, and where have we been? 3) What are we for? We know also, we who have faithfully served these last thirty years, that the Gay Movement has never addressed itself to even beginning to answer those questions since first we laid them before it in 1961-53. And this, in consequence, may be why the Gay Movement - as I suggested earlier in my remarks - has advanced its sense of contribution to Society so short a distance.

This Last summer that loondevful Gfsg ^Brother, PDon Rdhefner, together ioith John 3 nraside, Witch Walker, and 1 evoked

a SPIRITUAL CONFERENCE FOR RADICAL FAIRIES to

Of course there are many reasons for this lament able failure, some of them quite justifiable... some of them not so justifiable. aerhaos the most comoelling reason for the delay was that we had no body of knowledge about ourselves from which to begin to oerceive insights about our selves - as in sharpest contrast to the total insensitivity and blindness from where the Heteros insist on perceiving us. On1v in 1965, with the aonearance in Enalish of Konrad Lorenz' definitive studv in Ethology - "ON AGGRESSION”, did we receive the first tool bv which to beoin chisellino ourselves out of the blind allev the "Everything -we-know- in -emsoiousness-isenvironmental1y -learnod" illusion into which we had gotten swept bv the oseudo-sciences of Het ero -roale-defived-and-evolved Psychologists such

be held in the Arizona desert over the Labor JDag loeekertd. This last Summer that wonderful Gay Brother, Don Kilhefner, together with John Burnside, Mitch h'alker , and I evoked a SPIRITUAL CONFER ENCE FOR RADICAL FAIRIES to be held in the Ariz ona desert over the Labor Day weekend. At the

opening of that Gathering, we called upon Gay Brothers to tear off the ugly green frog-skin of Hetero-male imitation - in which we had wrapped ourselves in order to get through school with a full set of teeth - to reveal the beautiful Fairy Prince hidden beneath. In this discussion the writer shall be addressing him self only to the Fairy prince because the Gay '•’omen have not as yet shared with us SHE whom they oerceive in themselves, as Gay i*men, b e neath the Hetero-male-AND-female-derived-andevolved distortions they for so long have had to endure. Parenthetically, I might add - that the concept of Fairy Kings and Fairy Queens was never more than a mistaken Hetero Stereotype... as usual, Ole Pops attempting pompously to ex plain something he could never possibly under stand. In a Fairy Circle, who is at the head and who is at the foot?

innocence of that Sissy-boy’s Dream. And in that Dream, the glowing non-verbal dream of young Gayhood, may lie the key to the enormous and particular contribution that Gay People may have to make to our beloved Humankind... a key known as subject-SUBJECT-Consciousness.

Perhaps - before I go any further - I should ex plain what I mean by Fairy Spirituality. To me the term "spiritual" represents the accum ulation of all experiential consciousness from the division of the first cells in the primeval slime, down through all biological political social evolution to your and to my latest in sights through Gay Consciousness just a moment ago. else can we call this overwhelmingly magnificent inheritance... other than spiritual?

How to infect other fairies with the same ex citement we bubbled with in the Desert, and have soared and circled with ever since? One way would be to share the steps by which we made the breakthroughs to the riveting perceptions here inafter to be known as subject-SUBJECT Conscious ness. And then, beyond that, to share some of the gleaming insights these new dimensions to the Gay Vision lend to problems that heretofore have locked us in.

The pathways we explored, during our Desert Retreat, to transform ourselves from Heteroimitating Gays into Radical Fairies were many. Because the old ways of Fairy transformation were obliterated during the nightmarish centur ies of Judeao-Christian oppression, we felt our selves free to invent new ones. So- to begin with - we reached out to re-unite ourselves with the cornered, frightened little Sissy-kids we all once were: -we reached out to recapture, and restore in full honors, that magick of "being a differ ent species Derceiving a different reality" (so beautifully projected almost a century ago by J.M. Barrie's Peter Pan) which may have encap sulated our boyhoods and adolescences: -we told that di fferent boy that he was re member ed. .. loved. .. and deeply respected: -we told him we now recognized that he, in true paradox, had always been the real source of our Dream, of our strength to resist, of our stubborn endurance...a strength, again in true paradox, that few Hetero Males can even begin to approach let alone ma tch: -we told that beloved little Sissy that we had experienced a full paradigm shift and that he could now come home at last to be himself in full appreciation.

To begin...how old were you when you first began to be aware that you held a sense of beauty, an excitement, within you that was different from what other boys felt? I must have been about Four when one night I inadvertently beheld my Father's genitals: I thought they were the most beautiful things I'd ever seen and - equally in that flashing instant I knew I could never tell this t_o anybody t I was nine when my Father attempted to unmake the Sissy in me by teaching me to use a pair of boxing gloves...and I simply couldn't understand why he wanted me to hit some body else (sixty years later I can still feel the stifling paralysis of that bewilderment). I didn't want to hurt the other boys, I wanted to be tender to them in the same way I wanted them to be tender to me - even as I also knew, in that very same moment, that here again I couldn't share such heresies WITH ANYONE. All this time I would pretend that I had a friend who felt the same way as I did, and who under stood ever ything: but of course I knew there was really no such person. I knew that I was the only one like this in the whole world!

Carl Jung, in this respect, oroved to be absol utely right. '’ .tien the Fairies reached out to make re-union with that long-ago-cast-out shadow self so long suppressed and denied, the explo sive energies released by the jubilations of those re-unions were ecstatic beyond belief, ktien we caught up that lonely little sissy-boy in an ecstatic hug of re-uniting, we were re capturing also the suddenly-remembered sense of awe and wonder of the Marvelous Mother Nature who in those years so powerfully surrounded him, we were - yes - even jregapturing the glowing

And then came that wonderful day - that shatter ing day, full of glitter and glisten and fire works in my head and tumults of thunder and trumpets in my blood - when I didcovered... a word...a name(even though it was not yet in ordinary dictionaries).... for me...FOR US'. I wasn't the only one after all: I wasn't a wicked genii, I wasn't possessed by Evil or - raaybecrazy. There had been others - maybe even now 31

again forget as long as we lived. AND THIS in ourselves and, simultaneously, in each other “ y£ ALSO KNE w T T .... SUBJECT - TO SUBJECT'.

others - maybe even one whom someday I could meet. ANOTHER -just like me - who would under stand everything. And he would reach for my hand and we would run to the top of the hill to see the sun rise...and we'd never be lonely again. My source of course was a book by Edward Carp enter in the locked glass cabinet behind the Lady Librarian's desk. There was another book in that case - about grass - by a man named Whitman, which I would discover on another day when the Librarian had to step oat on an errand.

We must not suppose that we share subject-SUB JECT vision only in the spheres of Love, and personal relations. Actually - almost at once we began to become aware that we had been accum ulating bits and pieces of subject-SUBJECT per ceptions and insights all our lives, talking to trees and birds and rocks and Teddy Bears and remembering what all we had shared by putting it down in poetry, storing it all up for the wonder ful day when we finally would flash onto what it all meant. The personal collecting, and stor ing up of these secret treasures - these beaut iful beckoning not-as-yet-comprehensible secret sacra - is part of the hidden misery-cum-exaltation of growing up Gay. For the world we in herit , the total Hetero-Male-oriented-and-dominated world of Tradition and of daily environ ment, the SUMMUM BONUM of our history, our phil osophy, our psychology, our culture, our very languages of communication...all are totally subject-OBJECT in concept - in definition - in evolving - in self-serving orientation. Men and women are - sexually, emotionally, and spir itually - ob j ect s to one another. Under the "Fair-play-without-which-there-ain't-no-game” rules of the Hetero-male aggressive territor iality, even the Hetero-Males - precisely be cause they conceive themselves as in life-long competition each with the others - engage them selves endlessly in tug-of-war games of Domin ation and Submission. The most lofty system of governance the Hetero-Male has devised - Demo cracy - must be seen as a domination of Minori ties by a Majority, a tyranny of the Majority if you will, Domination-submission, subjectCBJECT. Fair Play, the Golden Rule, Equality, Political Persuasion, give-and-take, all of these are conditions of subject-OBJECT thinking. In each of cases, a given person is the OBJECT of another person's percept ions ... to be influen ced, persuaded, cajoled, jaw-boned, manipulated and therefore, in the last analysis, controlled. In the parliaments of government, the game of administration is to persuade Minorities to make of themselves objects of approva1 instead of objects of Disapproval... but OBJECTS regardless.

I suppose I was about elev en w hen and /{nd}

I first b eg a n thinking aboutthen fa tita siz m g

c f c o u rse,1 p e rc e iv e d him o s

subject in exactly

th e sa m e w ay

a s 1 p e r c e iv e d m gseffas su b ject.

I suppose I was about eleven when I began first thinking about - and then fantasizing about HIM! And, of course, I perceived him as sub ject in exactly the same way as I had perceived myself as subject . I knew that all the other kids around me thought of girls as sex-CBJECTS to be manipulated...to be lied to in order to get them to "give in"...and to be otherwise (when the boys were together without them) treated with contempt. And, strangely, the girls seemed to think of the boys as objects, too. But HE whom I would love would be another ME...we wouldn't manipulate each other, we would SHARE and we'd always understand each other completely and forever'.

To all of this - we Fairies should be, essential ly, alien. Because that OTHER... THOSE OTHERS., with whom we seek to link, to engage, to slip into, to merge with...is another LIKE ME...is SUBJECT - LIKE ME 1 I say "we fairies shou Id be alien - to as many aspects of our Hetero-Maledominated surround as we can be sensitive to" because we also know - all too glumly - just how easily and how often we fall prey to selfinvited oppressions: how often do we allow our selves - through fuzzy thinking - to accept, or to identify with, Hetero-originating definitions or misinterpretations of ourselves. The Hetero-' male, incapable of conceiving that there could possibly be a window on the world other than his own, is equally incapable of perceiving that we Gay People might not fit in ei ther of his ManWoman catergories, might be equally incapable of perceiving that we Gay People night turn out to be classifications very else: he might not be able to handle perceiving that the notion that persons are all varying combinations of

Then came that second shattering day IN THE LIFE ...when I first met that - OTHER. And suddenly between us - that social ly - invi sible Arc flashed out and zapped into both our eagerly-ready bod ies total systems of knowledge... perhaps one of those inheritable consciousnesses which Dr. Ralph Sperry of Cal Tech has recently been re warded for discovering...a system of knowledge of which our flesh and brains had always been capable of but never - until that moment of im printing - had actually contained. Like two newly-hatched chicks whose incubator-attendant has just now sharply tapped on their tray so that their feet, registering the vibrations, suddenly trigger body-mechanisms by which the Chicks can know to peck at the ground around their feet thereby triggering further, in turn, how to feed and drink.... so we two young Fairies knew - through that flashing Arc of Love - the tumult of Gay Consciousness in our vibrant voung bodies in ways that we - in the moments before could never have imagined - and now would never 32

male and female is simply a Hetero-male-derived notion suitable only to Heteros holding no thing of validity insofar as Gay People are concerned. Yet we Fairies allow Bullyboy to persuade us to search out the "feminine" in ourselves..."after all good ole Bully-boy used to tell us we threw balls like a gurl" (Right Fielders of the World -- UNITE!) Wow - that surely is pretty sexist thinking we've internalized right there. Did you ever ask the girls back then if they thought you threw a ball like them? THEY*D have straight ened you out in nothing flat; THEY'D have told you you didn't throw a ball like a girl - but like something OTHER. You were not a Sissy like the boys said. You were - OTHER’ . What OTHER? Let's us enter this brave new world of subject-SUBJECT consciousness, this new plan et of Fai*y-vision, and find out. All kinds of our friends would like to hear what we see. For instance, the Women of U'omen's Liberation would give their eye-teeth to know how to develop some measure of subject-to-SUBJECT relations with their men: and we who have known the jubil ation of subject-to-SUBJECT visions and visit ations all our lives have neither shared nor even spoken!

poetry - allegories - metaphors - a music a new way of dancing. We roust re-examine ever y systcm of thought heretofore developed, every Hetero-male-evolved subject-OBJECT philosophy, science, religion, mythology, political system, language...divesting them every one of their binary subject-OBJECT base and re-inserting a subject-SUBJECT relation. Confronted with the loving-sharing Consensus of subject-SUBJECT relationships all Authoritarianism roust vanish. The Fairy Family Circle, co-joined in the shared vision of LOVE (which is the granting to any other, and all others, that total space wherein each may grow and soar to his own freely-selectedfull potential), reaching out to one another subject-to-SUBJECT, becomes for the first time in History the true working model of a shar ing Consensus 1

To even begin to prepare ourselves for a fuller participation in our Gay subject-SUBJECT inher itance, we must - both daily and hourly - prac tise throwing off all those Hetero-imitating habits, compulsions, ways of misperceiving, which we constantly breathe in from our environmental surround. For this practise we need the constant company of our Fairy Families. We need the spiritual and emotional support of that non-verb al empathy which Sociologists assure us compro mises almost 7/8ths of the communication in any culture, that empathy we now refer to as Body Language. U'e need the marvelous input of each other's roinute-by-roinute new discoveries, as each of us begins to explore this vast new uni verse... this subject-SUBJECT Frontier of Human Consciousness. As ours are the first deliberate feet upon this pristine shore, there are no guide-posts as yet erected nor maps to have been found in bottles nor even the prospectuses of ancient visionary seers.

Of course we haven't as yet spoken because we haven't as yet learned how to communicate subject-SUBJECT Derceptions let alone subjectSUBJECT realities. Subject-SUBJECT is a multi dimensional consciousness which may never be readily conveyable in the Hetero-male-evolved two-dimensional, or Binary, language to which we are presently confined in terms of communic ation. And we need more than mere words and phrases. U'e need what Scientists invent out of the whole cloth when they attempt to describe and communicate new concepts: we need working models, a whole new mathematics perhaps, a new

Well, not quite right. SUFI was, for instance, a philosophical discipline capable of bringing its students to subject-SUBJECT ways of relat ing and perceiving the landscapes of earth and heaven around them. It was invented and devel oped by Gay Persian Mystic Poets and kindred Islamic Scholars, such as the great philosopher -poet, Omar Khayyam, during the 9th - 10th centuries A.D. It has long been generally re cognized that SUFI vision was a capacity open only to a few - though theory never went on to say why. For those capable of cultivating subject-to-SUBJECT vision, explanations were not necessary: for the Heteros who were incapable of subject - to-SUBJECT perceptions, explanations could only have been incomprehensible.

frog-skin of Hetero-imitation and discover the lovely Gay-Conscious not MAN (as the quitediscerning early Greeks called us) shining und erneath. Fairies roust begin creating their new world through fashioning for themselves supportive Families of Conscious Choice with in which they can explore, in the loving secu rity of shared consensus, the endless depths and diversities of the newly-revealed subjectSUBJECT inheritances of the Gay Vision'. Let us gather therefore -in secure and consecrated places . . . to re-invoke from ancient ashes our Fairy Circle to dance . . . to meditate -- not in the singular isolation of hetero subject-OBJECT praxis -- but rather in Fairy Circles reaching out to subject-SUBJECT evocation . . . to find new ways to cherish one another . . . to invent new rhyme and reason and ritual, replacing those obliterated in the long nightmare of our oppression, and thus, in fact, to re-invent ourselves. . .

In the last decade, Hetero Flower Children have revived some of the SUFI's trance-inducing rit uals without, however, comprehending the spirit ual pre-requisite that the participants be capable of relating to each other - as well as to the landscape and skyscape around - subjectto-SUBJECT, physically as well as emotionally and intellectually. Now - it is time for FAIRIES to reclaim these penetrating exercises and restore to SUFI its liberating and transcendant capacities for subject-to-SUBJECT thought and perception.

to reach towards spiritually sustaining and emotionally supportive Gay Families and Gay Family Collectives, who by the very mutuality of their SUBJECT-SUBJECT sharing are strengthened to reach out contributively to the hetero community around them, and so finally . . .

Reworking all previously developed systems of Hetero thought will mean, of course, that all the date we previously have gathered concerning Shamanism and Magick roust also be re-examined, reworked, and re-organized along subject-SUBJECT evaluations. Which is just as well because for instance - failing to perceive the lethal subject-OBJECT character of most traditionallyevolved Berdache Ritualism and Priestcraft, Gay Scholars have tragically mis led brothers and sisters of vulnerable Minorities and thereby, in consequence, toxified themselves at precisely those moments when we desparately needed their most crystalline of clarifications.

TO MAKE NEW COVENANTS LAYING THE GROUNDWORK FOR A NEW t^RLD CONSCIOUSNESS SHARABLE BY ALL’

Harry (Henry) Hay 5343 La Cresta Court Los Angeles CA 90038 (213) 469 7949

It is time, therefore, that we FAIRIES faced the reality that no Hetero-dominated culture, geared as each of them is to subject-OBJECT conformities, is ever about to discover acceptable Gay-Consciousness-tolerances within themselves - left to their own devices. Only when we Fairies be gin to validate the contributions Gay Conscious ness is capable of developing and delivering, are the Heteros going to begin to sit up and take notice. Only when we begin to manifest the new dimensions of subject-SUBJECT relationships superimposed over the now-obsolete Hetero subject-OBJECT traditions - and the Het eros beg in to perceive t he value of that super-imposit ion will they begin to see a value in altering their priorities. Only when they begin to become aware of their need for our contributions to their world-visions (and when they equally discover that their laws are in our way impeding our further output in their favor) will they find themselves sufficiently challenged to restruc ture their perceptions of essential human var iations . In the meantime, Fairies everywhere must begin to stand tall and beautiful in the sun. Fair ies must begin to throw off the filthy green

During the fourth Tidewater Lesbian and Gay Conference in Virginia on the July 4th weekend this year, Harry Hay presented this keynote address. During the speech he was in doubt whether the ideas he was relating would be understood and find acceptance with the audience. But, a jubilent standing ovation replaced these doubts with a warm smile and lively discussions ensued. John, Peter and Ron of Running Water attended this conference. We are struck by the far-reaching importance for gay men which we feel Harry's message contains. In 1976 RFD rejected a similar position paper finding the ideas incomprehensible. Now perhaps with time we are better prepared to understand. Part of this article appeared in the Winter '79 issue of RFD. We believe the merit of the ideas warranted reprinting this segment in this more complete version.

Poiver/ Gfentle Resolve Tfleditations ona Ttfdyickdl Wheel

franklin f^bbott The p a rts of magick never quite describe its cohole. There (jin magick a silence behind the sound, a spaciousness behind tht focm, a wisdom beyond its particulars To practice magick IS both to delight in its ritual and to loait on its essence.- elusive, Synergistic, primordial, uncharted, unfettered, } lotting, never the same, nor does it change- I t is simple, only, always, now.

Om laughing waterfall spirit, omgraceful apple tree deva. fire salamanders, nymphs of the wind, spirits of rock and rivers and flowers, om om om om. Tflagitf knows no separation from nature, no conquest of instinct or fear of the night. Touch the earth allowing the loss cf two beings meeting. 3elng earth being self inseperable. there is 3 center solid As mountains, fluid as oceans, f paradox strong and permeable both.

Ksd&X and deepen. Create safe space. Ground and uniter, hsk and osail. Open. Receive Imagine channel. Return and remember. Celebrate.

and

Waiting stands open accepting surprise. Without expectÂ ations receiving a message that lives a* a feeling lhat Jhwi as en answer to 3 question unspoken Emerge then an image transmitted in loving, enlivened by breathing soft through the heart of hearts, compassion made firm and pure breathing in and out of d common breath.

Patriarchymeans some

have more, food, money, power, importance ftiagick. renders equal shares to all. %triarchy relies on form, filling suppression of desire: rigid minds and regimented bodies, carrot dangled, seen and smelled, but rarely tasted tflagickinvites expression, loose imagination, supple bodies lithe to dance, full of play, eager for feasting, easy Co relax and en ter deep willingness to fe d beyond the bounds of skin.

ftitridvchy will Count its tomorrows and summon its amues to write its rules in stone; milsl on its rites, restrict its expressions of living and loving.

Circle casting: breathing in and out. The breaih Ushared by all. In. and out each from private hearts that open, join like spokes of a wheel to (heir hub. Centered melting hearts reverberate, growing s tro n g e r, pulsing out, radiating vibrations, B loving, glowing mandala of light, impenetrable love from the heart of hearts breathing in and out of a common breath, perpetual fountain of deep inner quiet.

Smoothing and rounding magicXjlows like ussier over slones. Tbhenl, wailing, gentle, constant. Soft in changing, changing always. C eleb ra teâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;- Undulating circles make, manifesting Joy in dancing, love delighting, apple eating, pan piping, flower laden feasting tables, pie filled dppelites, all fall dow n, bodies mixing moving parts, inter toes vinq soft c&vcsse^s, sleep coming under stars, ending cycles, deu> falling making fresh.

The patriarchy bred of fe a r of hell and hunger mounts arsenals, rattles cages, stages hangings, electrocutions, /fkgick knows and is the poioer of fove, the spring thatfollows winter, the harvest that feeds, the snow that purifies a sleeping planet. Tflogick is yielding, changing, d spinning wheel, htriOrchy invents time, calls it inevitable, then holds to the hands of its clock* so old bodies will not die. Wagick is Shiva, in decomposition releasing old f o r m s inviting creation as fresh, and unique as each moment emerging.

Smoothing 3 rd nsonding m agick flows like dreams over muscle and bone. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;P atient, w ailing, gentle, constant. Soft in changing, changing always. Om com passionate fa e rie power. Shine and blessed be.

ij one walks slowly by(fieri /{lien if onew alks slow ly catchingeachbreath watchingfor touching, laughter on thesteps foliousingtheeaglespath beneath thesun 35

L f onew alks slow ly therewill be lovingconsciousness to light jo ur a>Qg

sweeping broken cries like fallen leaves

from before your jootslep s on the J a e V j

becoming one

paths

TAURUS ON VIRGO ON TAURUS We got under the blankets and covens of faggot witches rose up— They took up the spells and brought forth all the energy of the earth— like bees swarming they came together to one place. It was September (in the current system) and you were bright against the night a torch a huge flame a signal that they would ride again. You moved the covers stroking performing faggot rites and I was hearing them hexing— avenging. I heard them calling— the drums and bells, the pulling. They were back to do some burning of their own. I saw them carrying sticks— wrapped in bundles— and chanting something about changing the meaning of the word. The sparks started flying and there was a circle, round and full as the moon. Their faces in the firelight were full and bright all of them meteors against the blackness— and they were singing— back again to free us all and throw down the bundles of the father. I >«inted to take you with me but I couldn't say a word, bound with my mouth on yours. You stroked and stroked all through it finally sleeping sof tly. When I got back you were already awake-mumbling something about coffee telling me about the news this morning— how the men on their firetrucks watched some monument burn like a giant, candle down to the ground, and could not put it out. You could not understand it you said, it v«s made of mortar and brick, and bundles of sticks were all that they found—

and you pulled me near to you as I stepped out of bed covering me with your softness and hugging up close, and me, laughing the whole way home... Ted Bohn 36

Jamal ,S .F .

A CALL FOR A

GAY COMMUNITY LAND TRUST

"Sell the land?

Why not sell the air, the clouds, the great sea." Tecumseh

THE NEED Few resources exist for Gay men who are ready to explore new possibilities of Gay Spirit/ Politics/Healing and to reclaim our rich, hidden heritage. Supportive, loving, and ex pansive living environments -- respecting how we see, feel and move in the world -- are hard to find. Little community building has taken place outside of the urban ghettos. It is often difficult to have access to rural land to live on, honoring a long tradition by Gay men of respect for the Mother in all her many manifestations in nature. THE VISION : GAYSPACE for Spirit / Politics / Healing It is envisioned that arable rural land would be secured to establish, through Community Land Trust, an intentional residential community for Gay men in the country. The orimary purpose of the community would be to provide a place for Gay men to explore deeply many new facets of Gay Spirit/Politics/Healing, re-inventing ourselves as a people in the pro cess. It would be a place of affirmation, confirmation, nurturance, and healing. A place for developing new models of being with each other and nature. A place where we can re learn to be stewards of the earth. The residential community is seen as movinq in the direction of being economically self-sustaining. From time to time the skills, insights, and resources of the land trust community would be made available to Gay men everywhere. The community would operate on the principle of loving, sharing consensus of all its members. WHAT IS A COMMUNITY LAND TRUST ? Community Land Trust is an alternative to either private or government ownership of the Land. The philosophical basis of the land trust concept is that since we didn't create the earth we should treat it less as a commodity to be bought and sold than as a lifegiving resource to be shared and used responsibly for the common good. The practical im plication of this concept is to place title to land in a non-profit corporation and convey long term use rights to a residential community. (For more information on this topic, see The Community Land Tr ust : A Guide to a^ New Model for Land Tenur e in Amer ica , published by the Center for Community Economic Development, 639 Massachusetts Ave., Cambridge, MA. 02139) . A GAY COMMUNITY LAND TRUST A Gay Community Land Trust is already in the process of being organized as a California non-profit corporation and of securing Internal Revenue Service 501 (c) (3) tax-exempt status. The Gay Community Land Trust is loosely modeled after similar legal arrangements recently established for land trust purposes by Women (for example, the Oregon Women's Land Trust) and by Blacks (for example, New Communities, Inc., in Georgia). A PLAN OF ACTION Since 1978 a small group of Gay men have been working on the Gay Community Land Trust Con cept. In simplified form, the process envisioned is as follow*: Researching the theoretical and practical aspects of the Community Land Trust Move ment in this country; (COMPLETED) Establishing a legal framework for a Gay Community Land Trust;

(IN PROCESS)

Calling into being an initial circle of Gay men interested in becoming immediate or eventual members of a land trust community or who are interested in supporting such a project in some way; (IN PROCESS) Facilitating the purchase or donation of arable rural land through the Gay Community Land Trust (discussions about the size of the initial acquisition have ranged from 20 to 100 acres); Establishing an initial core community of 5-8 persons on the land and implementing a process that would allow the residential community to grow to approximately 2025 Gay men; Moving in the direction of self-sufficiency in food through growing a staple crop, gardens, orchards, and animals (diet would be basically vegetarian); Moving in the direction of additional economic self-sufficiency through assorted small scale, cottage-industry type projects (for example, a printing press): 37

Making the skills, insights and resources of the community available periodically to Gay men everywhere through numerous types of individual study, workshops, and large gatherings; Assisting other Gay men in organizing intentional Gay Spirit / Politics / Healing communities through land trust arrangements. IF YOU WANT TO GET INVOLVED.... Get in touch with one of the following contact persons if you would like to get involved in some way with the Gay Community Land Trust: John Burnside, Harry Hay or Don Kilhefner 5343 La Cresta Court Los Angeles, CA. 90038 (213) 469-7949

Pat Gourley P.O. Box 18583 Denver, CO. 80218 (303) 832-9085

Mitch walker 738 Alcatraz Apt. # 3 Oakland, CA . 94 609 inexpensive property of any type that I imgnt be interested in?” Well have you ever considered Delinquent Foreclosed Tax Property Sales? These sales by law must be made available to the general public. As everyone knows all private property is taxed and Back Tax Properties are still being offered for sale for the back taxes which have been levied against them. Delinquent Foreclosed Property Sales are usually held annually by some 3,143 authorized officials in various sections of the United States. While format may vary from one sale to another, such property is generally sold at public auction to the highest bidder at prices below even "yesterday’s" real estate prices. If no one else bids on the property of your choice you may be one of those lucky individuals who acquires a so called “sleeper” — for merely the opening bid of the arrear taxes. In any event oncd the property has been sold and the deed issued, the previous owner can no longer redeem it. Few individuals have specialized in this particular field and seemingly, once they recognize the true potential of Tax Sales — they have been unwilling to share the information. Recently, however some individuals have begun to offer seminars and lectures on the subject charging as much as $400.00 for a one hour session. One individual, R. F. Brauer of Chatsworth, California compiled a complete listing of all3,143 authorized officials of the various tax districts in the U.S. His articles on the subject of Tax Sales have appeared in such well known publications as the National Reporter and Acres, U.S.A. His unique copyrighted material carries a money back guarantee and is a relatively simple approach for investment in tax foreclosed properties. It is nicely done and the only source of its kind for your receiving Tax Sales Notices from any tax district in the U.S. Those who find this idea of merit can write: R. F. Brauer, P.O. Box 882, Chatsworth, Ca. 91311 His material for four States of your choice is well worth $6.00. (A booklet form listing of all 3,143 addresses for the entire U.S. sells for $36.00). I agree with Mr. Brauer that the average individual probably should narrow his search for prime investment and growth areas in only three or four states. In this way you maximize your time and minimize the risk of overlooking a particular sale. However the entire booklet is nice to have for future reference and in case of later preference changes. Do not delay ifyou are at all interested in this field as foreign syndicates, large corporations, as well as small investors are beginning to realize that more money is being made in real estate in the U.S. then in all industrial in vestments combined.

Federal Law Creates A Bona Fide Homesteading Program The United States Government's Community Development Act created — what has been known as the "Urban Homesteading Demon stration." The official status of which now has been changed from that of a demonstration to that of a fully operating program. Authority to approve homesteading applications has been delegated to the Area Managers of the U S. De partment of Housing and Urban Development. Communities will be encouraged to homestead not only properties received from the HUD inventory under Section 810 but also properties obtained from other sources, such as tax foreclosures, purchase from private owners, other government agencies, or through the power of eminent domain. Even now current regulatory changes are being made that will enable more and more communities to par ticipate in the new program. Homesteaders are given the opportunity to acquire real property in a designated com munity at usually a nominal cost. The program is designed for helping low-income would-be homeowners, and its regulations have been published in the Federal Register (Part 590) December 1978. There are various conditions that have to be met by the individual — such as occupying the property for three years, rehabilitate itto meet local standards, however, when the homesteader finally meets all the requirements he receives full title to the property. O K. so you feel you don't qualify as an in dividual of low income — have you ever heard about H U D ’s Section 312 Loan Program? It is a program designed for even moderate income homeowners, to help them rehabilitate their homes with loans of low interest. Just consider that in 1979 more than 270 million dollars were available to some 700 communities through H U D ’s federal funded Section 312 Loan Program. Renovation projects have been ac celerated by the shortage of affordable housing and skyrocketing transportation costs, so check with HUD or your local Community Develop ment Office to see ifyou can qualify for a Section 312 loan Even if you do not qualify under the two programs mentioned above, check on HUD's Title IProgram. It offers a loan of up to $15,000, for making your home more livable. These 15 years improvement loans have varying interest rates though as HUD only guaranteed 90 percent of the amount of the loan w hich you will have to place with a bank. O K. — O.K., so you say, "I do not qualify for H U D ’s Urban Homesteading Program nor am I interested in fixing up my property, What other information is available to me for securing 38

h o m e s t e a d i ng TODAY’S BEST BUYS — BACK TAX SALES By R. F. Brauer The best price you could pay for almost anything today would naturally be one which was priced at yesterday’s prices. One type of in vestment continues to be available today at even below yesterday’s prices and that's DELINQUENT FORECLOSED TAX PROPERTY SALES. For you and I this is the cheapest available source of acquiring property since the Homestead Act of1862 in which the Federal Government freely deed property. As everyone knows all private property is taxed. Tax properties, although not a gift are sold for the back taxes which have been levied against them and all that you require is the “know-how” on purchasing foreclosure property. Even today full time speculators buy these seized defaulted properties with little competition because most of us do not know who to contact, nor how to receive tax sales notices and participate in these sales. For example: 1. Receiving Sales Notices — The entire United States has 3,143 authorized officials who conduct tax sales, there are 58 in the State of California alone. Generally such sales must be conducted at least once a year, and the tax sales notices are available to everyone. All that is necessary is to have your name and address included on their mailing lists in order to be notified. 2. Information In Notices — Financial in dependence and ownership 'of property have always been the American dream. Sales notices make it possible for you to have knowledge of foreclosure property ofevery type prior to itsbeing offered for sale. This information includes such items as legal description, area, previous owner, size of the property, any improvements and the required minimum bid at which the property may be sold. 3. Participation In Sales — While format may vary from one sale to another such property is generally sold at public auction to the highest bidder. By merely knowing the place, date and time of a particular sale you can participate. It is there and then that you can actually bid on each foreclosed property as it is being offered for sale. The time, date and place of an auction are an nounced in the foreclosure sale notice.

You can therefore see how important receiving of tax sales notices really is to you if you are to participate in any foreclosure tax property sales! 4. Amount of Money Needed — Speculators have been able to capitalize on the fact that most of us stillbelieve that tax sales require large amounts of cash. This is far from the actual truth, they are usually sold forthe back taxes levied against them. However, the more valuable properties may naturally be sold at slightly higher prices as more individuals are interested in bidding on these valuable properties. Often as not many so-called sleepers will be sold at the opening required minimum bid. 5. Bargains Being Found — There are many valid reasons why valuable property can become delinquent tax properties such as — death without a will, or without heirs, financial hardship, accident, divorce, disappearance of owner, a grave and lengthy illnessof the owner, disagreement between heirs, lack of interest of heirs, or just plain lack of knowledge of ownership by the heirs. However, whatever the reason, once the property has been sold and the deed issued the previous owner can no longer redeem it. 6 Recent Experiences— One purchase of mine was 17 acres for the final bid of $500.00. To mv pleasant surprise this particular sale was not well attended and Ifound myself buying this parcel for what I would consider mere pocket money. Another more recent purchase of mine w as for a California lake lot for which 1paid $1 ,1 7 5 .00 Ihave already been offered $7,000.00 for itand feel that in another few months its value will be at least double this amount At another sale Iattended 1actually saw a house on a city lot sell for a mere $550.00 It was one of these situations you read of from time to time in your local newspaper The individual who made the purchase was bound to make a large profit out of this one transaction , Vacant unimproved lots in the same area were selling for ten times the amount he paid for the house and lot. 7. Specialists In Tax Foreclosure* — Few in dividuals have specialized in this particular field, Once they recognized the true potential of tax sales — they were in most cases unwilling to share the information. Recently, however, some individuals have begun to offer seminars and lectures on this subject forfees of$400.00 for a one hour session Over the years tax sales have been of particular interest to me and I have gone through all the problems that you might encounter in finding in formation. Knowing how vital receiving Sales Notices can be has been the main reason for my copyrighting and making available a complete listingof all3,143 authorized officials of the various tax districts inthe U S. who conduct tax sales. 8 Advice to the Beginner — Foreclosures are rapidly increasing today and it is my opinion that the average individual should narrow his search to prime investment and growth areas inonly three or four states In this way you can maximize your time and minimize the risk of overlooking a par ticular tax sale. Foreign syndicates, large corporations, as well as small investors are beginning to realize that more money isbeing made in real estate in the U.S, then in all industrial investments combined. Above all don’t delay, now is the time to pur chase properties. Prices are rising at an un precedented rate and any delav on vour part will be costly to you if you don’t act immediately. Editor’s Note: Mr. Brauer's articles on the subject of Tax Sales have appeared in such well known publications as the National Reporter and Acres, USA. One of his articles is currently being syndicated. His unique copyrighted material carries a money back guarantee and is a relatively simple approach for investment in tax foreclosed properties. It is nicely done, should work well for anyone, and the only source of its kind for your receiving Tax Sales Notices from any tax district in the U.S. His material for four States of your choice is well worth $6.00. (A booklet form listing of all 3,143 addresses for the entire U.S. sells for $36 00). Those who find this idea of merit should write to: R. F. Brauer P.O. Box 882 Chatsworth, Ca. 91311

In a non-metal pan put the following* 2 or 3 teaspoonfuls Nettles k teaspoonfuls Jabourandi leaves 2 teaspoonfuls Witch Hazel leaves If light h a i r - 3 teaspoonfuls Chamomile Flowers If dark hair - 3 teaspoonfuls Rosemary leaves 1 or 2 teaspoonfuls Lavender Flowers 2 or 3 teaspoonfuls NEUTRAL Henna

These herbal remedies are sent by Jerry Stamps of Eureka Springs, Ark. He is both a liscensed Pharmacist and one of the best herbal ists in the area. His pharmacy is stocked with every medicinal herb available, his remedies make gay life in the Ozarks even more enjoyable'.

Add a quart of water, bring to a boil and simmer for about 5 minutes. Cover and steep unheated until cool. Now, use about a cup as a final rinse after shampooing and allow to dry on the hair.

Hair is the stuff atop the head that most of us take for granted until one day while preening in front of the mirror we suddenly notice that it looks "dead" or that our hair line isn't quite as low as it once was. It is then that a quiet sort of panic shakes us and we decide to do something. So we rush out and grab the latest shampoo and conditioner that ha3 been advertised only to discover after using it that we have a case of the Mgreasies" or that it is so brittle we can't brush it. So we try again and pretty soon the bathroom looks like the shampoo sec tion at Walmart's. Whoa! Stop! Eefore you start again, learn a little about hair. Essentially, heal thy hair starts inside you. The thatch on the outside is practically dead except for the follicle and maybe a tiny portion at the bot tom. So reasonably we should start inside. All you need is a fairly well balanced diet, a good supply of B-vitamins and about 100 to 1 50 micrograms of Biotin each day. All of these are the "STUFF" that good hair is made from. But the cosmetic appearance can be helped a lot by treating the hair right and by feeding the Bcalp. Firstly, choose a good non-detergent shampoo. I like one with keratin or henna ex tract since these do seal the hair shaft and prevent brittleness and dryness and secondly, make up a quart or so of the following herbal final rinse.

After using this rinse for two or three weeks, you'll notice a grand difference and soon you'll find that using this as little as twice monthly will be plenty. It is a great treatment and your hair will love it. - Jerry Stamps. PD WHAT THE HERBS DO Jabourandi leaves— Stimulates the scalp pores and the hair follicles due to the pilocarpine content. Witch Hazel leaves-A skin antiseptic and toner. Helps elinate excess oil and restores proper oil balance even in dry hair. Chamomile Flowers— Brightens light hair with its color & delicate oil content. Rosemary leaves--- Brightens dark hair with its own color and oil content. Lavender Flowers-- Balances the oil content of the hair with its own natural healing oil. Neutral Henna----- Seals the hair and adds shine due to its natural protein content. Nettles------------Stimulates scalp and adds valuable minerals.

by Jerry Stamps, PD your underware and wash it in hot soapy water (lye soap or Fel's Naphtha is perfect) and dry it in the sun. The sun's ultra-violet rays kill the fungus and thereby the chance of re infection from the clothing is reduced. Next make the following* In a non-metal pan put 4 or 5 tablespoonfuls of crushed Black Walnut leaves and 1 teaspoon ful of Goldenseali Add 1 cup of water and bring to a boil and simmer for 3 to 5 minutes. Cover and allow to steep until cool. Strain and put into a jar. Apply freely 2 or 3 times daily (especially in the morning and at bedtime) after washing the area with mild soap and water. In a few hours the itching will start to subside and in 4 or 5 days the redness will disappear - the siege is over.

All of us have been pla gued by Tinea cruris at one time or another^ Rost often this strikes in the Winter when we wear the most cloth ing, although it can infect us at any time. It is caused by a fungus which likes warm, slightly moist areas of the body and the crotch, especially in the winter, is a perfect place for it to spawn and grow. The areas to attack and treat are obviously the af fected skin in the groin area and the clothing. Take all of 40

AMO CANN1 One of the easiest veggies to can has to be the tomato. I also found it to be an easy veggie to grow. I started over 200 plants from a Hybrid seed known as the "Big Boy" variety. Using my basement as a nursery, I hauled enough tilled soil down to make a 3 inch cover over the initial layer of gravel, (about 2 in.). My soil was separated by l"x6" boards into 9 or 10 sections, each of which measured 6'x3'. This allowed me to care for the young seedlings without stomping all over them. It was still a confining arrangement, and I had the furnace to contend with. My lighting consisted of two dozen florescent light fixtures I had purchased from a con tractor who was demolishing an old school build ing. The elements I 'used were high intensity grow-lights purchased from a retail nursery. I planted my seeds much too close together in clumps of a half dozen seeds every 4 or 5 inches and ended up with about 2 dozen sprouts in each bed. Planting time was mid-March and I lightly sprinkled the beds with water every third day. Lights were on continuously and I added commercial plant food twice a week. By May 1st I was in trouble - the plants were ready to be moved outdoors but the weather was still too cold. I had to increase the ration of plant food and cut down the lights. Taking a big chance, I transplanted in mid-May and lost only a dozen plants. I wrapped the base of each plant with burlap at night, which was time and nerve consuming, but only for two weeks until I was sure that a chance of frost was gone. After the initial hassle, I was able to get by with water ing at evening every third day, weeding once a week I never pruned or trimmed the plants, but I did have to gradually decrease the plant food to which they had become addicted. By July I was eating tomatoes but it took until the latter part of July for the bulk of the crop to ripen - all at once! I mean when tomatoes get ripe, you have to pick them like yesterday! My yield was 8 to 12 big ones per plant. The tomatoes were all huge, bigger than a man's fist. I had to can them all in one weekend, so I employed a few friends and together we fired up the woodstove and boiled gallons of water to sterilize the canning jars. We used the large two-quart mason jars. This job took most of Fri day night, we did take a few breaks. The water was used for washing the tomatoes as well so that we wouldn't be wasteful. Saturday morning we started the cooking op eration. t«Je filled the top of the stove with the oddest assortment of pots that you have ever seen, quartered the tomatoes and dumped them into the pots, adding a quart of water to every 10 pounds of tomatoes. 41

/yCc\

I added a few spices to them while cooking, the amounts you may want to use will vary, but I found my own estimates produced a taste that was delightful. For every 5 pounds of tomatoes, I measured in: 2 tsp. tobasco 1 Bay leaf 1 tsp. sea salt We cooked them until soft and poured them in to the jars hot off the stove, filling the jars just a tiny bit less than full, sealing them im mediately. My yeild from 200 plants was ISO jars (2 quart size) and all the fresh tomatoes that 2 or 3 people can eat in a month. My overall cost was $10.95 for plant food and about $50.00 for the grow-lights. Lighting cost was minimal when spread over a two or three year period. The cost of the fixtures themselves was about $100.00 but I originally purchased them for growing my own bush (pot), which I did in the basement during winter months. What I did is not an example of scientific farming, just an example of a country faggot mak ing use of the mater ials available and a bit o f horse-sense. Future plans include building a greenhouse from scrap lumber and used glass. I will turn you all on to my plans, if you are in terested, in the next issue of RFD or you can drop me a line and we can rap about it. No charge cause I'm into sharing, that's what being ruralminded is all about. Trading ideas, trading ex perience, and coming out of the trade with a bal anced spirit, not a balanced budget. Take care of one another you faggots, love ya all David Frey 41379 2605 State Street Salem, Oregon 97310

In separate bowl mix 1 cup of oil (safflower, peanut, sesame, whatever), 1 cup honey and 1 tablespoon vanilla. Pour over dry mix and thoroughly mix until all are coated. Spread on 2 sheets, (no darling, not the mauve ones on your daybed) - baking sheets, and put in 200 degree oven for 2\ hours, turning mixture every 15 minutes. Store in air tight cans. Eat dry or with stewed fruit or milk. Rod P.O. Box 562 Mill City, Oregon 97360

HERE'S A HELPFUL HINT ON FREEZING CHEESE: When you take the frozen cheese out of the freezer, wrap it in a wad of newspaper (5-6 sheets). Then let it thaw that way. This allows the oil which has been drawn out of the cheese during freezing to redistribute itself in the cheese. Tastes like it was never frozen (Court esy of 3 Rivers Co-op) Steve Ginsburg Peppermint Parsley Farm Box 79 Mt . Aukura, CA 95656

TAKE A VEGETABLE . . . AND SHOVE ITt (To parody a recent song hit.) In reality, how many times have we opened the frig to look on a bowlful of left-over vege tables and had similar thoughts? As a country boy living a subsistence life on a quarter acre, I turned my thoughts to fool ing myself when it came to eating those left overs. Here's how:

GREAT AUNT ANNIE'S PEANUT BUTTER COOKIES cup shortening cup peanut butter (8 tbsp.) 1 cup brown sugar 1 egg 1^ cups flour ^ tsp. salt h tsp. soda 12 min. in moderate over (350°) h h

VEGETABLE SOUFFLE In a blender put a cup of stock (or water), 3 or 4 cups cooked vegetables and blend. Separate 2 eggs, adding yolks to blender mix.

Ken Mills Suite 410 58 Bridgeport Road East Waterloo, Ontario N2J4H5

In a saucepan melt a tablespoon of margarine and stir in 2 tablespoons flour until it has absorbed all the fat. Keep stirring to avoid burning. Add to blender and blend all. Whip the egg whites, add to mixture and blend. Pour into casserole and bake in 350° oven 35-40 minutes, or until center is firm. BUBBLE & SQUEAK Mash cold potatoes and cooked cabbage; mix to gether and fry, turning when one side is browned. Using drippings instead of oil adds more flavor. TIP IT ALL IN Mash up enough cold vegetables for your appetite, add any left-over cooked rice, meat loaf and add ^5 cup cornmeal and a beaten egg. Melt some drippings in a breadpan, add mixture, add a slice of bacon on top and bake for 30 minutes at 350°. Should come out crumbly and crispy. CORPSE REVIVER A healthy granola for breakfast or snacking. Mix in large bowl 8 cups oatmeal, 2 cups triticale flakes, 2 cups 4-grain flakes, l cup wheat germ, 1 cup bran, 1 cup chopped nuts. 42

Dear RFD, I am a 64 year old intel lectual planning to retire to the country next year. I have started to write a text in the social sciences on Omar Khay yam's versei "Ah, love, could we but smash this sorry scheme of things entire, and build a world that's nearer to the heart's desire." My academic background is sound enough to indicate that I just might be able to produce some signifi cant work. As a child I lived on a farm. I was then very frail and deafi so I spent a lot of time in the woods to excape the bully boys. Some of my best friends have always been four-footed. From them I learned the wonder and power of gentleness. I am as quiet and shy as they. For reasons which matter ed a lot at the time I got married when I was 4-3 and acquired two small step-child ren. Parenting is great, but step-parenting is a different can of worms. If Mom doesn't back you up all the way, bud, you are left out in the cold. When I was 62, my wife demand ed a divorce and every cent she could get. Sometimes lib eration comes at a damned high price. Since I don't have much money, I have prepared for retirement by acquiring some gardening skills and setting up a small, hopefully relocatable, nursery. Recently I'vd read a lot about low-cost, energy-effic ient housing. The materials cost of rammed-earth or soil cement housing is very low, but there is a lot of heavy work involved. Sometimes I dream about do-it-yourself; but then my mind reels from the shock; and I dream instead of getting help from the wellhung, muscular, unemployed lads in the prisons and ghettoes. The only sensible an swer seems to be a rural housing cooperative. Is any one interested? Are several better than one? My heart reaches out easily to others and not only to chipmunks, dogs, intellec tuals, and muscle studs. I like all kinds of people who are genuine and avoid only the insincere. Almost all child

ren are sincere and delight ful. There are, I understand, gay groups in NY and NJ trying to find gay homes for gay, homeless kids. Perhaps some of us should set up a group home/school? I have taught before and could again. I've been reading some gay literature. The recurring note of self pity pisses me off. On the whole we are freer, richer and smarter than they. We live as we please. Straights should have it so good! Please write me if any of this interests you. John J. Fox 666 N. Terrace Ave. Mt. Vernon, NY 10552

Gay musician (42) would like to share a corner of paradise on earth with some one out there. I live on 40 acres of land right on the Conn. River with my piano and sheepdog in a large old house (11 rooms). It's mostly woods with a brook bordering the south end of the place. The house has 3 woodstoves and spring water plus a sizeable barn In very good shape and an old shack (formerly broomshop about 100 yrs. old). So, the possibilities are there, but the direction and compan ionship are not. My interests other than music are outdoor activities (canoeing...), keeping fit at the YMCA, working around the house (painting and cutting firewood), theater, reading and travel plus learning the stained glass technique as a new hobby. Personally I ’m quiet, conscientious, responsible, open to new things and ideas, a semi-vegetarian, non-drink er and non-smoker who gets incredibly high on music and living in this place. If interested please contacti Ron Kllnka Box 137 Deerfield, MA 01342 (413) 774-3661 43

I will be visiting North Carolina and Georgia in Sept. It would be nice to connect with friends, acquaintances, and strangers. A native of Georgia until 1979» I miss the friendly open spaces of the country side. I am a singing, manloving man with a strong in terest in exploring real folk music and resurrected early American & European "artmusic" while I'm there. A British friend, a lovely man, Gerry, will be traveling with me for at leaBt part of the trip. Please write, if inter ested 1 Stevie Bryant 1433 Haight St. #4 San Francisco, CA 94117

I was president of the Rochester Gay Task Force and am now pursuing my activism towards emphasis on rural and small-town gay men. The need is great in N.Y. State for gay men to have a feeling of solidarity and to dispel the loneliness. PlanB are now underway for a Harvest Gath ering sometime In October. The gathering would take place on a farm; a gathering similar to the gathering for Radical Faeries in the South west early this year. Anyone wishing to contact us may write to the address (below). In Solidarity & Brotherhood Vern Hall & Roger Smith Brooker Hollow Rd. Richmondville, NY 12149

Dear friends. This summer I will be working in the D.C. area for a few months and would like to meet others of similar and dissimilar tastes. I am a 24 year old hand some male, 6*3". 190 lbs.,

beautiful blue eyes, shorx brown hair, and a soul with red and bluish white stripes. Due to one of the more exotic gifts of the Goddess, I am presently using a wheelchair. I ’m not paralyzedj I'm just not able to walk. A year ago I was up walking around and now that’s changed, but to my amazement, I'm still good old Bill Shepardson. I've known I was gay since age ten growing up in the scenic Ozarlcian town of Warsaw, Missouri (pop. 1?00). Growing up in rural America, I think I learned the need for a harmony between city and country. I don't believe cities are the permanent address of the Whore of Baby lon any more than I believe that the country is the answer to our current cultural pre dicament. I'm not sure there are any answers, just mistakes of varying degrees. My main Interests are writing and spirituality. I love to write and hope to get some of it published. My spiritual interests are for the indigenous paths of everyday life, the seasons, trees, flowers, birds, magic, love. I was enamoured of the "Eastern" paths at one time, but the authoritarian and "hard-work" approach to spirituality was not to my liking. I'm a lazy spiritual ist. My approach is nicely reflected in Naomi R. Goldenberg's Changing of the Gods» Feminism and the End of Tradt1Iona 1 "R 7 H g I 5 H 8 ~ H5? vision is spirituality as a sharing in "the process of symbol formation...image making." It is an upleveling from pro duct (old static symbols) to process (creative shared sym bolizing). I think paganism and witchcraft come closest to where I am. I'll be in D.C. from late May to early August, after that it's back to Missouri. My mail will be forwarded. Don't let the wheelchair put you off. You'll be miss ing the experience of this lifetime. And if I can get you to believe that maybe we can share metaphors. I ’m a Pisces, Moon in Cancer with Gemini rising, if that tells you something. Blessings beBill Shepardson P 0 Box 9? Warsaw, MO 65355

Wolf Creek Homestead needs caretaker. Five acres with two cabins, water, elec., phone, creek, trees, etc. I need someone who needs space and the country for six mos. Write» Len Box 282 Wolf Creek, OR

97497

Hey, I'm a farmer of sorts. I live in a town of 5,000 resi dents and have an egg produc tion business (10,000 laying hens) about 5 miles up the road. I graduated from UNC Chapel Hill with a degree in Botany and did two years of graduate work in mushroom toxonomy. I'm interested in plants, mushrooms, real people hypnosis, psychic phenomena, old houses, music, art, travel and gardening. If you're in this neck of the woods, stop in and I'll show you my chick en house. We can sit in the yard in the evening and talk about egg prices and chickens over a glass of iced tea. I have to stop now and freeze these beans. Give me a call or drop a line. Joe Childers 1123 N. Main St. Mocksville, NC 27028 (704) 634-5198

Hi, I am living right now in the bedroom community of Roh nert Park, CA, and I want out. I would like to hear from someone out there who needs a fellow companion, who himself is happy with himself and his life, non-competitive and holistically orientated. I am 29 . I like to grow things, paint with watercolors enjoy evenings on the porch and mornings watching the sun rise. I need a stable envi ronment and I am looking for a sharing relationship with gentel, honest communication. I am a vegetarian and I don't smoke. If you are looking for someone like myself, and have the space I would appreciate hearing from you. Tony Young P.0. Box 3156 Santa Rosa, Ca. 95402 44

Seeking housemates. Having moved to the country once and finding it financial ly impossible, I have acquired a large old historic home in Asheville, N.C. I would like to interest others to join me in forming an urban collective type situation here. I see this as an extension of the rural collective at Running Water Farm (an hour's drive away) and a way for people who cannot afford to move to the country yet to be able to con tinue working while enjoying the country at the same time. Please write to me with your ideas and desires. Mikel Wilson 115 Montford Ave. Asheville, N.C. 28801 (704) 258-0449 5> Dear friend 1 I am a proff. trucker and would like to know about men in the RFD area. I travel all over NC, W V , VA, SC, Ohio. I got your add in Drummer. I am 36, 6 ’ tall, 215 lbs., 50" chest, 37" waist, 1 7 " arms, 8" uncut thick & straight apping. I am a weight lifter, can squat 450, bench 250 j I am not super muscular but am very strong. Axle Smith P 0 Box 8032 So. Chas., WV 25303

We are two men who want to remove ourselves from the "system" as soon as possible and work with and around na ture in the country. We are now living in Maryland at the city/country edge of the mountains and are saving money to semi-retire and relocate in nearby West Virginia's eastern panhandle. This area has a moderate cli mate and is rural, mountain ous, free of restrictions, and very rich in nature's work. Return to the country will not be hard for us since we are both from fairly rural backgrounds} Virginia and Wisconsin. We prostituted ourselves by moving to cities to make money, but have had the goal in mind of using this money wisely to return to the country, live more self-sufficiently, and retire from the "system" earlier. We now have a 20 room

stone house in the country, hut near city, with old world charms since we do not intend to make our lifestyle in the country a mundane drudgery. We have a world of fireplaces, candlelight, and flowers at the tablej all interwoven with masculinity. We want to surround ourselves with a family of men willing to share natural, sensual and sexual experiences with us and who are willing to work hard and who may possibly join with us later as we ful fill our goals of moving fur ther into the country. We know that we want to live, fuck, work and die for our selves and with nature and a small family of like-minded men. If you are interested, please write. Jerry Krieger Matthew Steward Dearbought 8427A Liberty Rd. Frederick, MD

21701

heated house made mostly from recycled materials. We are interested in any arrangement for gay friends to be here with us either buy, share, build your own house whatever. Let me know what you have in mind or just if you're interested. Also we love to have visitors anytime. Just come by (we're almost always here) or write first if you want. Are there any other RFD readers presently living nearby? Jim Hartman Burnt House W. Va 26336

New England vegetarian, organic gardener, someday farmer is looking for a man. Lots of hardwork, farm life, and good lovin' should fill all my days. Lots of poten tial waiting for the right partner. Homesteading is a wonderful life. When there is someone to share it with. I'm 24, 5'10", 140 lbs. look ing for the same who needs help in the country. Have blue eyes, blond hair, short brown beard, love animals and nature. Let's enjoy the sun sets together. Please write 1

Hello Fellow Faggots, Are you enjoying your summer? It really is beauti ful up here in the woods of N. California. And here is an invitation for any number of brothers to come visit our mountain home. Dave and I have a 2 story cabin on 40 acres of trees about 60 miles SE of Eureka, on Hwy 36 . Things are primitive but life is easy and folks are friend ly. We need all the gay con tact we can get tho, as it gets a little old after a while to see just the he/she couples - nice folks but not gay. And I believe that the more contact gay brothers have with each other the better we'll all become. Once we know each other, the rest of the world will find it easier to know us. So come on overl If not a visit, please drop a line, for a little two-way support com munication. If paying a visit write for directions toi Randy Krahn Dave Vegliano Star Rt Box 6?-C Bridgeville, CA 95526 (no phone, no electricity, no gas 1 lust fresh air & cool water)

Brian Fisher P 0 Box 318 Jacksonville, VT 05342

Dear RFD,

6 - ^ ® -- »

Dear RFD, Are any of your readers interested in a partnership in a developing self-suffic ient homestead? I have land in British Columbia's beautiful Gulf Islands. Some additional capitol to get things going would be welcome, but not absolutely essential.

In the past few years I have traveled (mostly in Cal) to visit single, gay males living in the country and mostly on ranches. They were contacted by me through let ters and ads in RFD and other gay publications. Time, mon ey, and energy were expended in meeting and getting to know these men (however brief ly), but without any defini tive results. I have not given up the idea of finding a partner/friend/lover who is looking for the same. All of the mon I visited in the north west states were already sit uated to some degree in the country. That condition alone is not primal with me, but the desire to do so is. So I have remained in San Francisco un til that situation presents itself with someone, although it is almost impossible to find "country" people/lovers in the city. In case anyone out there is interested in big, benign, sensous bears, I am ItalianHungarian, Gemini, quite hand some and muscular, hairy, mas-

Jim Thomas Bang£3? BC Canada VOS IEO

Dear RFD, I am a gay young man living in the country with my wife and three small children. We are looking for one or more gay men to share our farm and life. We have 1 31 acres of woods and fields about i mile from the paved road. We are presently working to finish our passively solar 45

culine and rugged, dark brown curly hair and full beard (with some grey), 6 ft., 185 lbs., with large paws, feet, nipples, deep bass voice, in telligent and versatile, a young 42 years (look mid- 30 's) energetic, imaginative, and strong. Physical measurements includei 45" chest, 3 1 " waist, I 6i" arms, 1 ?" neck, 23 " thighs, I 6i" calves, 12E boot. (Hope that doesn't sound too clinical or narcissictic to anyone). I enjoy the outdoors, hunting and fishing (for food only), swimming, nudity, se clusion, snow (with a warm, responsive man), animals, neo pioneer life, leather, biking, hiking, camping, crafts, cook ing, all music, and more. I would like to corres pond with and eventually meet a man very similar in physical description and interests, 3040 years, mellow, bearded longhair, perhaps tatooed, sexually uninhibited, tall and husky, who could dig me, a committed relationship, and a quiet life in the country once we get it all together. Be there such a creature? I surely would like to hear from him. Letters with photo/s appreciated with immediate response. Big bears and other type animals in the woods please contact!

my efforts mostly benefitted an unappreciative landlord who lived ninety miles away final ly got my goat. Three years ago I moved to Modesto where I had found a job with the Post Office as a letter carrier. A year and a half later, I had enough money saved to put down on a house in town. It's a nice older home with a big back yard and lots of fruit trees. When I'm not working at Post Office, I'm working on the house. If all goes well, it will be finished by summer 1981. I hope to sell it for a fair profit and have enough money for a good down payment on several acres in northern California or Oregon. There, I hope to start a widely varied, biodynamic farm and get back to enjoying my days working with the land, crea ting my own little garden of Eden. This is very much an agricultural area - one of the best. But I know of no other gay people with similar in terests to mine. So it was very refreshing to pick up RFD and be reassured that I am not the only gay person who would like to get back to the land. Please start my subscription again. As I am nearing my goal, I need the support RFD gives me to follow through with this. I would enjoy hearing from any one who feels an urge to write me. Sincerely, Charlie Young 923 Patricia Ln. Modesto, CA 95354

Steve Pallagi 157 States San Francisco, CA 94114

Dear RFDi Dear RFD, It was kind of exciting for me to get a hold of your journal again. It wasn't easy - I couldn't find it in San Francisco nor in Santa Cruz - ended up borrowing it from a friend. I had a sub scription to it a couple of ears ago when I was living n the country near Oakdale. I left country living to take a full time job so that I could one day return to the country as a landowner rather than a renter. My experience as a renter was pretty frustrating. I seem to have an endless supply of energy to sink into the earth and a homestead. That

I will be moving to the south around the 14th of Mar. in the area of Pensacola, FL and/or Mobile, AL. Well I am interested in making friends and I am also interested in having pen-pals from all over the country and world. I am also looking for work! I need a job on the level I am 5'7” , 1 25 lbs., brown curly hair, blue-green eyes - swimmers build. Randy L. Sly 1501 9th Ave. W. Oskaloosa, Iowa 52577 My address will be for warded. So write - all will be answered! 46

Bonjour I live in the mountains of the Ardeche, one of the most wild provinces in France. Visitors who would be willing to help with the farm and can speak some French would be welcome. Roland Tardy La Coste St. Jean-Roure O7I 6O Le Cheylard France

6"— '

Dear RFD and readers 1 Would love to meet an Aries male (uncut) around a relationship. Love and under standing are key words. We could do it any where but on the land is best. I now live on a gay col lective in So. Oregon. I'm 5'10", 160 lbs., 38 , brown hair and eyes, white fern. Open to all. Love, Tracy 4525 Lower Wolf Creek Rd . Wolf Creek, OR 97497

Dear RFD’ers, Would love to hear from fellow fairies seeking country land or community to move to wards. We welcome sincere folks, into backwoods living, craftsmen, farmers. The Arkan sas Ozarks are rustic, beauti ful and friendly. Eureka Springs - called the San Fran cisco of the Mid-West - is a thriving gay-straight crafts community! many of us are scattered throughout the woods and hills in a b-0 mile radius of that town. We are develop ing our own rural community network of gay folks, welcome inquiries, sometimes.visits. Jim Long Manitwo Farm Rt. 1 Box 45 Blue Eye, MO 656II

A peace of situation. Somewhere there is an agile faerie youth who needs a peace of situation far from

------ CONTACT LETTERS--------

the tremulations of traffic and the cacaphony of clutter ing crowds. This youth, whose flow is as a flower, needs a sheltered spot amidst the trees within a magnificent moonscape and where there is an abundance of clear water. This youth requires a micro scopic world where harmony holds and where beauty pre vails. This youth has a need to cherish and to nourish the green and the vital. This youth also has need to share a teaching and a learning of life's mysteries and life's lessons. Such a youth is Ganymede, much sought by Zeus in ths Northwoods aerie. This seeker is a man of parts, a faerie woodwizard, wordsmith, stonemason, pond-digger, gardener, traveller and cul ture creator. But for his furry friends and the lady faeries, this seeker is alone. He cannot fly like an eagle amidst the streets and the

w w

sewers of the great cities, for his tasks are many and his nest is made. His abode is to be found near to the fountainhead of all the waters of this continent, Turtle Island. His direction is North beyond the Great North ern Divide where begins the river Mississippi, our Father of Waters. Of all the count ies in Turtle Island that are touched by the Mississippi there is only one where one can safely sip water directly from the Father of Waters. Such is Clearwater County, Minnesota. Ganymede, where are you? You are needed and much welcome. I, Spiritwood, can be contacted c/o Magnusheim Clear Brook Minnesota 56634

Portuguese, German, French, Span., Italian or Norwegian. Please, if you are interested in a true friendship, write me. We can become good friends. Here I'll close expecting a prompt reply", Marcus Aurelious Av. Dos Expedicionarios 4026 Fortaleza Ceara 60.000 Brazil

—

Dear RFD, I am gay and live in the back woods of east Texas, in a community of ten, myself being the only gay member. I'm interested In reading and making contact with other "country gays".

Dear friends, Keep the faith even after all these years,

I am a brazilian boy 1 I'm 21 years old. I'm skinny and my skin is tanned. I am looking for boys who would like to correspond with me. I can receive letters in Eng.,

Lee 0. Sprue 11 Rt 2 Box 350-A Linden, TX 75563

W W

O F F He went off, he said, to join the bikers Righteously roaming the cracking lands. With Jesus pretty close to coming. And if you rest your eyes in loving You may well face a grave defeat. He went off, he said, to repudiate the Holy Grail; To jam his head full of Biblical learnings; To work a little majik while the night was strong And if you rest a few nights with a lover, It softens the heart to fresher discoveries. He went off his rocker, he said, In the dark nights making love to me. In the warm sun making love to me. In the draft of the noisy fan making love to roe. There was an animal with such primitive passions Asking him for no reprieve. And if you close your eyes with a lover, You may well close your eyes on another. Actually, he went off and never said anything About the dark things that drove him. Me and the thousand possibilities Asking ourselves the whats and the whys Or was he just afraid to love, he said, Of resting his body in love ? Michael Mason 0------------ — ---

MORE NOTES FROM HERMIT HOLLOW

fruit trees that start with the bud, then the blossoms and their beneficial guests, the bees, to the first swelling fruit on to maturity. I was given four Aracuna pullets - the breed comes from the high Andes, and my black one has the lean look of a wild bird. Two speckly brown, (one the much put-on by the others was the first to lay). Blacky lays a dark brown egg and whitey came up with a duck-egg blue. None yet from the brown one that used to be the boss and is new the underdog! I wonder how they decided to stop roosting and fouling in the nestboxes when the third one started to lay, and use the perches? Why does the non-layer scratch and turn the soil yet seldom grabs an uncovered worm, letting the others snatch them from under her beak? The hen house is made in the south end of a tool shed, and being four feet high I use the roof as a platform for growing ray seedlings. Salvaged window frames cut into the wall make this small greenhouse, with some warmth from the chickens below. All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, so putting a French door in the end wall of my bedroom, I've made a small patio with surrounding laurel hedge where two of us can sunbathe in the nude. A consideration in buying a country property is whether you're prepared to go it alone, and without any gays in the area. From the RFD sur vey the majority live alone with little or no physical contact. If one is aesthetically in clined aloneness is tolerable most of the time, but a visit from a compatible friend brings that extra sparkle to the eye. We country boys are not the only ones alone judging by the thousands of ads in gay publica tions. Loneliness is the rule rather than the exception. That's why I continue riding my high horse in saying there's a great need for empathy, compassion and sympathy by all, to all, whatever one's age. If the under 35s would get together with the over 35s they'd find a great love and understanding that maturity brings. And remember you too will be over 35 one day so why not start a rapport now and help bring about a change of attitude for future younguns' .

Cosing to the country again after urban living and working one is inpatient to see a growing garden and possibly some livestock, but there's a season for everything, and Nature moves slowly. Many of today's books written on settling in the country, from property buying; building a cabin to compost making, make everything seem so easy. True, enthusiasm along with patience and hard work make the transition more easy, but some careful planning is necessary unless one has unlimited cash. So many lavish money on machinery and gadgetry, but to start a garden, rent a rototiller or as I did on my 100 x 50 foot vegetable plot, hire a contractor with heavier equipment. The whole job was done in little more than an hour. I found a poultry farm in the area that raised day-olds to 7-weeks and cleaned out the houses for each new batch. They delivered two dump truck loads for $30. Spread with 2cwt of Dolomite limestone and turned under by spade, I've had good crops from the first season. Each year since I buy a load and every third year add more Dolomite. To avoid full crop failure I rotate root crops with above-ground ones, and have been lucky not to have suffered from nematodes or wireworms. The county agricultural agent and Dept, of Agr iculture, Washington, D.C. supply free bul letins for all crops, and the magazine Organic Gardening is a mine of information plus readers experiences that they've found give larger crops. (That's not necessarily larger vegetables as young ones are more succulent). The State Li brary is a good source for borrowing the more expensive books, and in winter I enjoy looking at the coffee table de luxe editions of land scaped Japanese, Italian and British gardens. (My flowers are grown in rows among the veg etables and under the fruit trees!) My garden tools are a long handled shovel, a spade, a 4-tine garden fork, rake and hoe, and hand tools for transplanting seedlings, secateurs for pruning, and a lawnmower. One must be practical, but there's the philosophic side that needs nourishing too. Bird song, watching the daily transformation of

by John

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S U B S C R I P T I O N S

at $2.00 each. There are plenty of issues available. We are trying to gather the from Iowa, Wolf Creek as well as from Efland some of the first two years' issues will When that comes about, we will run a notice

RFD relies almost entirely on subscriptions and book sales. As it stands now, there aren't enough subscriptions to sustain the cost of printing much less distribution, so pLease spread the word and encourage more subscriptions! RFD is a very nice gift for a friend. RFD is a non-profit organization, and donations to it are tax deductible. It’s not possible for everyone to write, draw or work on layout, but perhaps someone out there can afford a few extra bucks. That is another important way of contributing to the production of RFD. We publish all names and addresses of contirbutors unless we are asked not to. We will NOT send subscribers names and ad dresses to anyone requesting them. Please share your knowledge and visions through RFD. We welcome material of all varieties for possible inclusion in future issues. WRITTEN MATERIAL! Neatly typewritten and/or double spaced is helpful, but not required. What is nore Important is that your work leave your hands as you would have it appear in print since we prefer not to edit anyone"*^ work. Also helpful would be a SASE (self addressed, stamped envelope) if you want your work returned whether it's used or unused. POETRYi Send what you feel is your best work, with an eye toward succinctness. GRAPHICS! Black and white only, please. Do not exceed ten inch column width. PHOTOSi Should be black and white only and high contrast if possible. Indentification of subject, time, location is also helpful and should be included when possible. We look forward to hearing from you with love.

S U B M I S S I O N S

The theme of each RFD will be determined by the collective assembling the Feature section. We are interested in hearing from groups who would like to do a feature section and in hearing from any one who has ideas for future themes. MUSIC AND DANCE, Fall issue, #25 (deadline has been extended). is being done by a group of men in Afton, VA. of faggots...

The feature section

The hills are alive with the sound

We also expect to have a report on the Spiritual Gathering for

Radical Fairies in Colorado if material is submitted. THE OZARKS, Winter issue, #26 (deadline Nov. 1).

This issue's feature will focus

on gay living and homesteading in the Ozark Mts.

If you have any experiences or

insights, please submit them before November. Theme-related material submitted for a prticular issue should be mailed to RFD, Rt. 1, Eox 127-E, Bakersville, NC

28705, unless otherwise specified.

deadlines are as follows! For the Spring issue - Feb. 1» Summer issue - May li Fall issue Aug. 1 t and Winter issue - Nov. 1.