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© © 2018 The Henry Farm, Inc
FR E
E!
SITCOMICS TM PROUDLY PRESENTS:
EPISODE ONE “IN THE BEGINNING!”
DIRK ENTRESANI
WRITTEN BY ART & COLORS BY LETTERED BY DARIN HENRY BLAIR SHEDD MARSHALL DILLON
What if you were fourteen and could read minds?
MARSHA MOSS
Or tell secrets to your best friend telepathically? Or mentally control a basketball so you never miss a shot? Telepathetic chronicles the surprising and hilarious adventures of Dirk and Marsha, a pair of ninth grade underdogs who gain amazing super-powers only to discover that the most popular girl in school has them too!
BETH WILLIAMS
AMY LUONG
TELEPATHETIC IS
Dedicated to Ursula Burton, our two children, my brother and sister and my parents. - DH ALL CONTENT SUITABLE FOR ANYONE ALLOWED TO WATCH BROADCAST TV AFTER 7PM.
Sitcomics™ Presents Telepathetic No.1 (FREE COMIC BOOK WEEK EDITION) January 2018. Published by Sitcomics™ 171 Pier Avenue, #207 Santa Monica, CA 90405 All contents Copyright © 2018 by The Henry Farm Inc. All Rights Reserved. The stories, characters and incidents mentioned in this magazine are entirely fictional. No actual persons, living or dead, are intended or should be inferred. More information at www.Sitcomics.net or at www.facebook.com/Sitcomics Follow us @Sitcomics
SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME HEROES HAVE WALKED AMONG US.
MEN AND WOMEN WITH EXTRAORDINARY POWERS WHO HAVE RISEN ABOVE THE REST.
THIS IS THE STORY OF ONE OF THEM.
SORRY! NO, NOT HIM.
HIM!
SKATE TOUGH, HALF-PIPE HOOLIGANS!
...GET YOU LATER.
TO TALK WITH ME-WALK WITH ME.
BAND KIDS.
ISN’T HE OUR TOWEL BOY?
HI, ADAM.
DO RE MI FA SO LA TI--
YO!
NAH. HE TRIED OUT FOR TOWEL BOY BUT COACH CUT HIM.
PIGSKIN POSSE! HIGHEST OF FIVES TO YOU!
DIRK! | NEED TO TALK TO YOU.
HI, DIRK.
APOLOGIES, MARSHA. {PUFF PUFF} CAN’T STOP.
WHY ARE YOU WALKING SO FAST?
POINTNINEEIGHT!
YOUR DAD’S STILL ON YOU TO GET IN SHAPE?
MY FATHER GAVE ME THIS PEDOMETER TO MEASURE HOW MANY STEPS | TAKE.
HE SAID | HAD TO WALK A MILE BEFORE LUNCH AND |’VE ONLY DONE--
HI, DIRK.
HI, ADAM.
MARSHA, MY FATHER IS TO ME WHAT VOLDEMORT IS TO DUMBLEDORE.
WHOA!
DIRK, THAT’S AWFUL. |’M SO SORRY.
IT’S NOTHING | CAN’T HANDLE.
BYE, DIRK.
INTERROGATIVE: WHY?
HI, ADAM.
SO LISTEN, | NEED TO DO OUR “THING” TONIGHT AT SIX-THIRTY INSTEAD OF SIX.
BECAUSE OF THAT SHORT STORY CONTEST. | STILL HAVEN’T FINISHED MY STORY AND |’M ON THE VERGE OF A STRESS BARF!
BUT THE PRIZE IS FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS.
OKAY FIRST, BACK UP OUT OF SPLATTER RANGE. AND SECOND, WE HAVE TO STICK TO THE ROUTINE.
| WANT TO UNLOCK THE HIDDEN SECRETS OF THE HUMAN MIND--
{SIGH}
YOU WANT MONEY. DO THE MORAL MATH, MARSHA.
SIX O’CLOCK. MY BASEMENT. IT’LL JUST BE US.
YOU AND ME.
THAT’S WHAT | MEANT BY US.
| STINK AT MORAL MATH.
AND... ONE MILE.
| FEEL THE BURN!
OH, BETH, | SHOULD TOTALLY WEAR THAT OUTFIT FRIDAY NIGHT. WHAT A GREAT IDEA!
YEAH, IT JUST POPPED INTO MY HEAD.
EXCUSEZ, MARSHA.
AMY, WAIT UP!
WOW! YOU LOOK AMAZING. SO LISTEN, | HEARD YOU AND CURTIS BROKE UP.
AND | WAS WONDERING IF YOU WANTED TO SEE A MOVIE WITH ME ON FRIDAY.
OH, DIRK | WAS HOPING YOU’D ASK ME OUT!
|’M HAVING A REALLY BAD DAY AND THAT JOKE WHERE YOU PRETEND TO ASK ME OUT ALWAYS CHEERS ME UP.
REALLY?
ISN’T HE HILARIOUS, BETH? OH YEAH. TOTALLY.
{SIGH} YES!
YES | DO LOVE AMY.
WHY WON’T SHE FEEL THE--
SAME...Y. DIRK, YOU’RE SINGING AGAIN.
IT’S CALLED OPERA. IT’S CALLED EMBARRASSING.
LATER THAT NIGHT. ...CONCENTRATE.
FOCUS.
...CONCENTRATE.
FOCUS.
OOOLAWALLY?!
WE’VE SPENT FOUR YEARS TRYING TO HEAR EACH OTHER’S THOUGHTS WITH ZIPPO RESULTS.
THAT’S RIGHT. IT UH... MEANS FOCUS IN... SWAHILI.
DIRK, THIS ISN’T WORKING!
THE KEY IS NOT TO FLY, BUT TO SOAR!
NOT TRUE!
WE SPENT THE FIRST YEAR TRYING TO FLY.
...OOOLAWALLY...
| THINK THE KEY IS NOT TO FALL.
MOMMY.
THEN WE SPENT SIX MONTHS TRYING TO BE “HUMAN ELECTRIC GENERATORS.”
AND... CONTACT!
BUILD THE STATIC. BUILD THE STATIC! BUILD THE STATIC!
FACE IT, DIRK, WE’RE NEVER GOING TO BE SUPER-HEROES. MOMMY.
MARSHA, WAIT!
SCIENTISTS SAY HUMANS ONLY USE FIVE PERCENT OF THEIR BRAINS. THAT MEANS NINETY-FIVE PERCENT OF MY BRAIN IS MISSING.
| BETTER GO.
HELP ME FIND IT! ARE YOU SURE ONLY NINETY-FIVE PERCENT IS MISSING?
MARSHA, | CAN’T PLAY SPORTS, | CAN’T SING, AND | ONLY MAKE GIRLS LAUGH WHEN |’M NOT TRYING.
BUT IF | HAD SUPER-POWERS, PEOPLE MIGHT TAKE ME SERIOUSLY.
JUST ONE MORE TRY. PLEASE. WHAT DO YOU SAY?
LET’S GET MENTAL!
YES!!!
...BUT, DIRK, JUST THIS ONCE COULD WE TRY IT WITHOUT TALKING? SURE.
IT MIGHT BE FUN TO MEDITATE IN SILENCE.
TOTAL. COMPLETE. SILENCE.
IN FACT, YOU COULD EVEN SAY IT’S--
NOTHING BUT ME AND MY THOUGHTS.
DIRK!
SHUTTING UP NOW.
UNNNGGGH!
OH NO, | FORGOT TO FEED NIBBLES!
HEY, YOU SAID NO TAL--
--KING.
WHAT JUST HAPPENED?
| KNOW, BUT | DIDN’T SAY IT... OUT LOUD.
EEP!
YOU SAID YOU FORGOT TO FEED NIBBLES.
DIRK, WE DID IT!!!! WE’RE TELEPATHIC!!!
THE NOT TALKING MUST HAVE BEEN THE KEY. LET’S DO IT AGAIN!
IT’LL BE EASY. LIKE RIDING A BIKE WITH YOUR BRAIN. BUT--BUT-WHAT IF WE CAN’T?
COME ON. WE’LL JUST RECREATE THE EXACT EVENTS.
UNNNGGGH!
ARE YOU FEELING OKAY?
UNNNGGGH!
| WAS DOING THIS LAST TIME.
UNNNGGGH!
UNNNGGGH!
WERE YOU POOPING OUT A PERSON LAST TIME?
CAN WE JUST DO THIS, PLEASE?
{GIGGLE} SURE.
| CAN BARELY RIDE A BIKE WITH MY FEET.
YOU CAN UNCLENCH, DIRK! IT WORKED!
UNNNGGGH!
| KNOW, RIGHT? LET’S CALL IT... “THE BRAIN HOLE”.
THIS PLACE IS TOO COOL!
...BRAIN HOLE?
WHAT’S WRONG WITH BRAIN HOLE? | THINK IT’S KIND OF OBVIOUS.
NO BATHROOMS. WELL, WHATEVER IT’S CALLED, IT GOES ON FOREVER.
NO DOORS...NO CEILINGS...
UNNNGGGH!
OOH YEAH. WE BETTER GET BACK. THOSE FRITTATAS | ATE ARE STARTING TO BITE BACK.
MARSHA, WE HAVE SUPER-POWERS! DO YOU REALIZE WHAT THIS MEANS?
THIS IS SO EPIC!
YES, BUT THERE’S SO MUCH MORE!
LIKE WHAT?
YEAH, | GUESS THAT’S IT.
LIKE-LIKE-LIKE--
BUT WITH PRACTICE, WE COULD EVENTUALLY DO ANYTHING JUST BY THINKING IT!
YOU JUST DESCRIBED A DOG.
WE CAN TALK WITHOUT MOVING OUR MOUTHS AND NO ONE ELSE WILL EVER KNOW?!
IMAGINE EATING WITHOUT UTENSILS, SCRATCHING YOUR OWN BACK, CATCHING A FRISBEE WITHOUT USING YOUR HANDS!
DON’T YOU HAVE A SHORT STORY TO WRITE?
HINT TAKEN.
THE NEXT DAY.
?
MARSHA!!! MARSHA! MARSHA!
WHAT?!
TO THE BRAIN HOLE. NOW!
| AM TAKING A TEST!
THIS IS AN EMERGENCY, MARSHA! TO THE BRAIN HOLE!
TELL ME THE ANSWER TO THE FIRST QUESTION. WHAT?!
OKAY, |’M HERE. WHAT’S THE BIG EMERGENCY?
DIRK, THAT’S CHEATING! WHAT HAPPENED TO USING YOUR POWERS TO GET RESPECT.
HEY, PEOPLE RESPECT STRAIGHT A’S! NOW TELL ME THE ANSWER!
NO!
MARSHA, |’M GETTING HELP ON A HISTORY TEST NOT CONQUERING EARTH. ...YET.
YOU SAID IT YOURSELF. WE’RE SUPER-HEROES NOW. AND THAT MEANS USING OUR POWERS FOR GOOD NOT EVIL.
COME ON. ONE ANSWER.
FORGET IT.
PLEASE! NO!
MARSHA!
PLEASE! NO! PLEASE!
DIRK!
NO!
HEY!
COULD YOU TWO JUST SHUT UP ALREADY!? SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO TAKE A TEST!!!
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