THE
A MAGAZINE FOR THE ROYAL ST. GEORGE’S COLLEGE COMMUNITY
SPRING 2018
SHIELD Overcoming Adversity The Tragedies and Triumphs of the Georgian Community
Omar Rajani ’95 and His Miracle Family of Four The Bond of Georgian Brothers in Times of Trouble 9/11: The Day the Towers Fell Matthew Culbert ’18: Comfortable in His Own Skin
100% 100% GEORGIAN PARTICIPATION
Annual Giving
2017/2018
This year’s annual fund focus is on Phase 3 of the Junior School Redevelopment Plan. The third phase will refresh the classrooms in the lower level of the Junior School. This includes improving lighting and air quality, and the creation of a common area for students. Beyond the physical changes in our school, the College continues to focus on the funding of scholarships for boys who otherwise would not be able to afford an RSGC education; through the Manners Maketh Men Scholarship and Bursary Fund. Our goal continues to be 100% participation.
The only gift too small... is no gift at all.
Please use the enclosed form to make your gift or visit the Giving Tab at rsgc.on.ca Charitable Registration Number 887281087RR0001 For more information, please contact Maria Jordan at mjordan@rsgc.on.ca or call 416-533-9481 x298
Contents
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The Shield Spring 2018 Email: shield@rsgc.on.ca General Inquiries: 416.533.9481 Alumni Inquiries: 416.516.5202
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Headmaster: Stephen Beatty ’86 Editor: Lauren Mandarino Copy Editor: Dave Mitchell Designer: Jonathan Cresswell-Jones Photography: CanGrad Studios, Lauren Mandarino, RSGC Archives, RSGC Community, Tom Stevens Editorial Committee: Scott Ackley ’04, Marin Anderson, Stephen Beatty ’86, Drew Blanchette ’96, Maria Jordan, Lauren Mandarino, Clare Samworth, Jasmin von Teichman RSGC Board of Directors Officers
FEATURES 8
Alumni Spotlight BY LAUREN MANDARINO Omar Rajani ’95: Omar and Natasha’s message of hope.
10 Student Spotlight BY LAUREN MANDARINO Matthew Culbert, Class of 2018, learns to be true to himself. 12 Alumni Parent Spotlight BY LAUREN MANDARINO Lynn Factor: Lynn’s passion for her job earns her a Canadian honour. 14 Faculty Spotlight BY LAUREN MANDARINO Art teacher Greg Seale finds his place at the College. 16 Times of Trouble BY SUMNER & LANG Three different stories of how the Georgian community comes together during difficult times. 22 The Day the Towers Fell BY LAUREN MANDARINO It’s been 17 years since the tragic events of 9/11, but for two members of our community, it’s a day they will never forget. 28 Have Backpack, Will Commute BY SUMNER & LANG Lessons of the road and rail from RSGC students and alumni.
DEPARTMENTS 4 5 7 31
Events Message from the RSGCAA Giving Retrospective
Chair: Bruce Chapple ’87 Vice Chair: Cathy Cranston Past Chair: James Crossland Treasurer, Audit and Finance Committee Chair: Steve Geist Headmaster: Stephen Beatty ’86 Chief Financial Officer, Board Secretary: Jane Nyman Directors Peter Furnish, Advancement Committee Chair Roma Dubczak, Strategic Planning Committee Chair Adrian C. Lang, Nomination and Governance Committee Chair Jasmin von Teichman, Guild Representative Alex Edmison ’02, Alumni Representative Dorothy Byers Ryan Cookson ’03 Jennifer Keenan Caroline Newall Jesse Parker ’01, Clergy Gordon Raman The Shield is the official magazine of Royal St. George’s College. Serving RSGC’s alumni and community, it strives to engage, inform and connect all audiences.
FPO The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 1
LETTER FROM THE HEADMASTER
Dear Fellow Georgians,
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elcome to a poignant issue of The Shield. One of my regular messages to the boys, often shared in the Chapel during the times when I have the privilege of addressing the whole school, is that we don’t get to choose what happens to us. We do, however, each get to choose how we respond to challenge and difficulty. This issue of The Shield includes stories of adversity and resilience. It reminds us of the power of community in supporting those facing difficulty, and of the ways Georgian values manifest themselves in the face of challenge. The story of the Old Boys from the Class of ’88, highlighted in the story on page 16, is one that particularly resonates with me. As a Lifer and a member of the Class of ’86, I grew
up with Jonathan. I was able to bear witness to the remarkable example of pietate demonstrated by his closest friends and their families as they walked with Jonathan through the entirety of his journey right up until the end. Tragically, we faced another terrible loss in our community this past March with the loss of Grade 9 student Danya Leemhuis in an accidental drowning. In the face of this unimaginable tragedy, the grace of our community shone at its brightest. The outreach and care shown to Danya’s parents and brother, the way our Grade 9 boys supported each other and were supported by their teachers, the gathering of over 800 people at the College on April 21 to join in loving memory of this beautiful boy were all
manifestations of our community at its best, in a time of unspeakable sadness. I am, everyday, so proud to be a Georgian. This issue of The Shield is a powerful reminder of why I hope we all are.
Stephen Beatty ’86 Headmaster
Message from the Editor
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nd just like that, another school year has come and gone. Are they going faster or am I getting older?! It always amazes me to see how quickly the boys
grow and change. This year, the boys who were in Grade 6 when I arrived at the College have now graduated. I’m excited for the adventures that await them, but it’s a bit difficult for me to see some of them leave after so many years. (I’m not a teacher – I’m not used to this!) I look forward to them keeping in touch with us through social media and when they come back to visit, so I can see them as they continue to grow and develop into adults. This issue has some interesting stories. I can’t
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promise that no tears will be shed while you read them. I may, in fact, have shed some tears while writing them. The good news is that this issue is not meant to be sad. We have amazing people in our community who have stood tall in difficult times – people who have relied on their Georgian family to rally around them. You’ll read about an alumni parent who was named a member of the Order of Canada, an amazing story about an alumnus and his wife who went to great lengths to have a family, commuting
stories from students and alumni, and much more. I hope you enjoy them all! As always, I welcome any and all feedback about The Shield. If you have any story ideas for future issues, please send them my way. Have a wonderful summer.
Lauren Mandarino Editor, The Shield lmandarino@rsgc.on.ca
RSGCAA Executive
MESSAGE FROM THE RSGCAA PRESIDENT
President Drew Blanchette ’96
Exciting Initiatives
Vice President Eddie Beqaj ’08 Committee Chairs: Jonathan Lucas ’03, Fundraising Chair
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ven though we muddled through a very nasty winter, some wonderful initiatives took shape during the first half of the year. In February, we launched the Alumni Speaker Series. The first topic focused on wills and estate planning. Our alumni panelists shared helpful knowledge with attendees. The second Speaker Series event took place prior to our Mentoring and Networking event in May, presented by Gluskin Sheffield + Associates Inc. In line with one of RSGC’s core tenets, helping boys become the best versions of themselves, the theme was “Career Coaching: How to Find the Right Job for You.” Both of these events were well received and we look forward to next year. Special congratulations to Robert Eng ’88 for being awarded the Mentor of Distinction honour at the Mentoring and Networking event. Another great initiative that launched in early 2018 was our Alumni Job Opportunity Resource Board. Many of our alumni work together after they leave the College and we hope to facilitate more of this. If you or your company have a career opportunity for which you feel a fellow Georgian would be well suited, please email alumni@rsgc.on.ca. We will post these on the alumni portal and our RSGC Alumni LinkedIn group. All opportunities are welcome, from full-time careers and internships to partnerships. With another school year in the books, I believe our community shone
RSGC
ALUMNI
ALWAYS GEORGIAN
A Note from Yvonne and Victor Blanchette, Georgian Alumni Parent Representatives
Geoff Osborne ’08, Mentoring & Networking Chair Thomas Robson ’14, Communications Chair
as always, coming together in times of hardship and joy. Resilience is something that comes up frequently in this issue, and it’s also something that we consistently aim to foster in our youngest Georgians and carry with us throughout life. Nelson Mandela once said, “Do not judge me by my success, judge me by how many times I fell down and got back up again.” Much of the time, getting back up requires help from others and I am proud that our Georgian brothers and community continue to be exceptional at supporting each other and getting back up. I wish you all a healthy and fantastic summer with your family and friends.
Committee Members and Alumni Liaisons: Established Alumni 25 years+ Peter Antonoff ’82 Will Fripp ’88 Mid Level Alumni 15-25 years Dan Mitchell ’99 Young Alumni 6-14 years Sam Morse ’11 Riley Wong ’12 Recent Alumni 5 years or less Elias Blahacek ’13 Connor Byrne ’13 Anthony Lisi ’15 Committee Representatives: Alex Edmison ’02, Past President and Representative to the Board of Governors John Buckingham ’71, Representative to the Foundation Board Student Liaisons: Jeffrey Irwin ’18 Oliver Sabiston ’18 School Representatives: Stephen Beatty ’86, Headmaster Maria Jordan, Executive Director of Advancement Marin Anderson, Manager of Georgian Relations Scott Ackley ’04, Alumni Relations Officer & RSGCAA Representative to the Faculty and Students
Drew Blanchette ’96 RSGCAA President alumni@rsgc.on.ca
As we reflect on the great and final year we had as your Alumni Parent Representatives, we are happy to report that the popular Carols and Cocktails event is now officially an annual tradition that will continue for years to come. Your new Alumni Parent Reps, Anne and Tim Gallagher (Connor ’15 and Carlyle ’18), will share more information on the 2018/19 events and other ways to stay connected in the Fall Alumni Parent Newsletter. We are also so pleased to announce that our son, Drew ’96, accepted a second term
as the RSGCAA President. We couldn’t be more proud of the work he is doing at the College. It has been a pleasure to serve as your Georgian Alumni Parent Reps these past two years. We were delighted to reconnect with so many of you and encourage you to stay in touch with RSGC and each other. Have a wonderful summer. Yvonne and Victor Blanchette Parents of Mike ’91, Nick ’94, Drew ’96 and Phil ’98
The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 3
EVENTS
A Busy Season
Hidden Gems February 8 showcased the incredible hidden talents of our community in support of the Georgian Scholarship for the Arts. A special thank you to Molly Johnson; Stephanie Martin; Masters of Ceremony Jay Kearsey, Brian Robinson, William Howard-Waddingham ’18 and Michael Vassos ’18; and the Hidden Gems Committee for helping make this event such a success.
Community Skate Night On February 13, the RSGC Community Skate Night took place at the Christie Pits outdoor rink. Fun was had by all, thanks to music, mascots and hot chocolate!
London Alumni Reunion Headmaster Stephen Beatty ’86, Sanaz Ghoreshy, Stefanie Turner and Scott Ackley ’04 were in London, Ont., on March 2 to catch up and raise a glass with 20 alumni now at Western University.
Alumni Speaker Series: Wills and Estate Planning On February 28, the RSGCAA hosted speakers Adrian Walton ’78, Leonard Bosschart ’81 and friend of the College Stephanie Kotsopoulos, who provided their expertise about wills and estate planning.
Conference of Independent Schools Music Festival (CISMF) April 8 was a big day for 15 Junior and Senior School boys, who participated in the CISMF at Roy Thompson Hall.
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Don’t forget to add these exciting events to your calendar:
Terry Fox Day – September 21 Knights’ Fayre – September 30 Grad Alumni Speed Mentoring Event – October 4
RSGCAA AGM – October 4 RSGC Open House – October 11
Grad Mothers’ Tea
Legacy Father & Sons’ Breakfast – October 23
This special day for mothers of boys graduating in 2018 was held in Ketchum Hall on April 20.
Old Boys’ Dinner – October 26
Toronto Alumni Reunion On May 7, Toronto-area Old Boys gathered at the Duke of York pub, joining Stephen Beatty ’86, Nick Van Herk and many other faculty members for an evening of food, drinks and fun.
Grade 9 Take-Your-Kids-toWork Day – November 7 Senior School Day of Service – November 16
Mistletoe Market and Cocktail Reception – November 19 Georgian Round Table – November 26
8th Annual Networking & Mentoring Event presented by Gluskin Sheff + Associates Inc. On May 24, the RSGCAA hosted a group of both young and established Old Boys at the Cambridge Club for an evening of networking and mentoring. Prior to the event, the second Speaker Series featured advice on how to land your next job.
Admissions Application Deadline – November 30 Grandparent and Neighbourhood Carol Service – December 17
Alumni Legends Ball Hockey Game – December 18
Service of Lessons and Carols – December 19
Alumni & Alumni Parent Carols & Cocktails – December 19
Royal St. George’s College 5
Leave a Legacy...
because the world needs more Georgians.
10 things you can do today to leave your legacy gift: • Prepare a will. • Leave a gift to RSGC in your will. • Leave a specific dollar amount or a percentage of your assets to the College. • Consider using assets for your legacy gift. • Consider RSGC as a beneficiary of your RRSP or RRIF. • Name RSGC as the beneficiary of an existing life insurance policy.
• Purchase a new life insurance policy naming RSGC as the beneficiary. • Remember loved ones with memorial gifts. • Encourage fellow Georgians to remember the College in their wills. • Before making any financial decision or commitments, contact your financial planner.
For more information or to discuss your legacy gift, please contact: Maria Jordan, CFRE Executive Director of Advancement Royal St. George’s College 120 Howland Avenue Toronto, ON M5R 3B5 Phone: 416-533-9481 ext. 298 mjordan@rsgc.on.ca
This information is provided by Leave a Legacy Canada, a program of the Canadian Association of Gift Planners www.cagptoronto.org
RSGCAA ALUMNI
Young Alumni Give Back Through the RSGCAA
FUN FACT: Both Elias Blahacek ’13 and Connor Byrne ’13 got their current jobs through RSGC networking!
For the first time, the RSGCAA Executive Committee has several members who have graduated in recent years. Why are these young alumni giving back to the College in this way? The Shield asked these new committee members the question. I joined the RSGCAA to assist with the planning and organization of the alumni events. As a recent university graduate and only a couple of months into working full-time, I felt my input could benefit those searching for jobs and internships. I’m particularly motivated to do this because I got my job through the network, and hope the same connections can be made between fellow Georgians. – Elias Blahacek ’13 I decided to join the RSGCAA after meeting with various alumni who advised that I join. Some of the guys I met had joined once they finished university and said that it was a great way to meet fellow alumni of all ages and from different backgrounds. Others told me that they wished they had joined when they were my age because they thought it was a great opportunity. I also thought it was a good way to get involved and contribute to the different events run by the alumni association. – Connor Byrne ’13
The alumni association has been a great way to stay connected with RSGC and keep in touch with old classmates. I was also attracted by the work the association does to help both current students and recent graduates transition into post-RSGC life. I’ve benefitted tremendously from the guidance and mentorship of RSGC Old Boys, so I was excited to help facilitate similar opportunities for those younger than me. – Anthony Lisi ’15
I wanted to give back to the RSGC community through volunteering with the RSGCAA because I continue to see the value and importance of giving back to any community that helps to shape a part of your character. RSGC means a lot to me and I look forward to working with our group closely in the coming year. – Sam Morse ’11 The RSGC community is a major influence on who I am as a person. The fellow students, teachers and staff, parents and alumni all have played a role in my personal and professional development. In my Grade 12 year, RSGCAA President Colin Watson was often around, and to this day remains a close confidante. When current President Drew Blanchette asked me if I would consider joining the RSGCAA, I jumped at the opportunity. I’ve had the opportunity through chaperoning choir trips and coaching the U16 and varsity basketball teams to interact with current Georgians. I’ve received a lot from this community; I thought it was time to start giving back through service on the Alumni Board. – Thomas Robson ’14 It’s been six years since I graduated high school, but RSGC has remained an important part of my identity. I joined the RSGCAA as a way to reconnect with the College, and simultaneously help to build and maintain its network and community. – Riley Wong ’12
The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 7
ALUMNI SPOTLIGHT
A
OMAR RAJANI '95
MESSAGE OF
BY LAUREN MANDARINO
W
hen Omar and Natasha Rajani got married in 2010, they had no idea that their journey to have kids would be such a bumpy road. The couple tried to get pregnant for over four years, trying nearly every available measure in an attempt to conceive. From simple cycle monitoring, fertility drugs and intrauterine insemination to a terminated ectopic pregnancy and failed IVF, it was a never-ending up and down of stress, nerves and tears.
HOPE
“When you have so many struggles, it’s a roller coaster ride, but Natasha was in the driver’s seat,” said Omar, who works in small business marketing at Canada Post. “She was the one who had to go through the cycle monitoring, she was the one who had the ectopic pregnancy and the injections. She was so strong – it was incredible. You just never imagine you’ll end up in this position.” But then something incredible happened.
After years of fertility struggles, Omar and Natasha now have the "million dollar family".
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Natasha’s age, the failed IVF and other challenges they were having made them eligible for a trial treatment, only available at one clinic in North America that happened to be in Toronto. Called Augment IVF, the treatment re-energizes a woman’s eggs using mitochondria from her own egg precursor cells. In the trial treatment, which has not been approved by the FDA in the United States, mitochondria – seen as the “batteries” that energize the cells – are injected into an egg, along with sperm, during IVF. The couple froze four embryos and implanted two. Nine months later, on April 13, 2015, Zain Rajani entered the world. He made international headlines, becoming the first baby in the world to be born via Augment IVF. “I always knew I wanted to have kids, I just didn’t think it would be this hard for us,” said Omar, who described Augment IVF as “IVF on steroids.” “We were elated when Zain was born. I still tear up when I think about it and I’m getting choked up now just talking about it.” After all the stress of getting pregnant the first time, the Rajanis were hopeful to add another child to their family, with Omar actively encouraging Natasha to have a second baby. Natasha, however, was a little more hesitant.
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“Going through all of these failed processes, I needed to be emotionally prepared that Zain was going to be an only child in the event that our last two embroyos didn’t work,” said Natasha. “That would have been the last thing we tried, so I really needed to be emotionally prepared to not have a second. I think it was harder to prepare myself for not having any more children because I knew what it was like to have one. Before, it was easier to make the decision because I didn’t know what I was missing.” The embryos are graded and the best two were transferred with Zain. So neither Natasha nor Omar thought it was going to work with the remaining two. “It was stressful,” said Omar. “We’re grateful to be parents and we wanted more children, but if it didn’t work, we would have coped. It would have been different having no children and it not working. We would have come to terms if we had only had Zain.” On January 19, 2018, Malai Rajani was born, making her the second Augment IVF miracle baby for the family. And no one is happier for Omar and Natasha than Omar’s close friend, Aaron Thompson ’95, who supported his friend through their fertility issues for years. “It was difficult seeing them struggle because we all knew how much Omar and Natasha wanted children and how dedicated and amazing they would be as parents,” said Aaron, who met Omar at RSGC in Grade 5 and is Zain’s godfather. “It was a feeling of pure joy when they announced they were pregnant. And that was not just for me and my wife Tara, but also for our two daughters, who were so excited to have a ‘little brother’ and, now, a new ‘baby sister’!”
Now, the Rajanis are adjusting to a new set of challenges. “When you have one child, you have two parents on one,” said Natasha. “When you have two, you have to divide and conquer.” Meanwhile, Omar is trying to get used to a fuller house, more responsibilities and not having much time to relax anymore, while Zain has to adapt to not being an only child. “Zain is adjusting to not having all the attention on him,” said Omar. “There are all these toddler struggles – it’s hard to get out the door at a reasonable time and drop him off at school. I’m always late for work. When I get home, I want to spend time with family, but then there’s dinner, bath time, struggles with getting Zain to bed and wash the dishes. Meanwhile Natasha is just trying to keep her head above water.” Still, the couple wouldn’t have it any other way.
Throughout their whole ordeal, they both remained positive, hopeful and supportive of each other. “As a husband, when you get married, you promise to be supportive. You make a commitment, so that’s kind of your job,” said Omar. “You have to have a positive outlook and all you can do is hope for the best. Rather than be negative, stay positive and hopeful, and with any luck, your dreams will come true. They did for us.” That was the message Omar and Natasha wanted to bring when they agreed to all of the media coverage when Zain was born. “Natasha’s message was really one of hope. There are tons of people out there with fertility issues, yet it’s a taboo subject that people don’t talk about. We wanted to bring it to the forefront,” said Omar. “Zain is our message of hope that great things can happen. You just need to stay positive and hopefully things will work out for everyone.”
Zain's godfather, Aaron Thompson '95 and his family are thrilled that the Rajanis have welcomed another little one into the family. The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 9
STUDENT SPOTLIGHT
MATTHEW CULBERT COMFORTABLE IN HIS OWN SKIN BY LAUREN MANDARINO
M Matthew received two rare and very high judo honours this year – a steward tie and a brown belt.
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atthew Culbert, Class of 2018, received a brown belt and a steward tie in judo this year – two rare and very high honours. In the 19 years that Sensei David Miller has been teaching at Royal St. George’s College, he has awarded approximately 15 brown belts (the highest level awarded at the College) and three ties. The achievements are well deserved. Matthew, who was introduced to judo when he started at RSGC in Grade 7, does not compete in the martial art, but he is extremely dedicated and works closely with Sensei to run and deliver the after-school judo program. He also spends a lot of time teaching and training. What is unique about Matthew is that underneath his judo gi, he has a rare skin condition called epidermolytic hyperkeratosis that makes it a challenge every time he steps on the mat. “Sometimes I come home looking like I’ve been in a fight,” said Matthew, who was born with the genetic condition. “My skin cuts really easily, so I pay a little bit of a price sometimes. Of course, sometimes I don’t cut myself at all. Whatever the case, it’s worth it.” Matthew explains that his skin is missing the under layers, which makes his body constantly think it is injured. His body, therefore, heals extremely quickly, but also takes on a very rough, scaly appearance. His mother, Denise Loft, explains that Matthew’s skin is incredibly fragile.
Matthew, his sister Emily, mother Denise and father Brian enjoy spending time together whenever they can.
“A little bump to most people will break his skin,” she said. “After a judo session, Matthew will have cuts on his nose, knuckles, eyebrows and feet. Sensei Miller bought this special tape, so he can bandage him up when need be.” What Matthew doesn’t know is that before he started judo in Grade 7, Denise almost emailed Sensei to tell him about her son’s skin condition and that she didn’t think it would be a good idea for him to get involved. “In the end, I decided not to send the email and figured I’d just let it unfold. And look what happened,” said Denise. “I think sometimes as parents, we protect our children too much and we should let them blossom. We have our own preconceived notions about what’s going to be bad for them. Can you imagine if I had actually sent that email?” Certainly life at the College would have been very different for Matthew, who spends so much time in the dojo. Not only has judo been extremely good for his self-confidence and helped Matthew overcome challenges, but it has also helped him build a strong relationship with his mentor, Sensei Miller. Sensei is impressed by Matthew’s eagerness and leadership skills, his interest in the philosophical aspect of the martial art, his remarkable natural ability and his tremendous instincts. But he knows these haven’t come easily. “His determination and resolve to succeed gave him the tenacity to push through any of the challenges that he was facing,” said Sensei, who says that
Matthew is one of the most skilled judo students he has ever had. “But nothing came easily or without a price. Every time he stepped on the mat was a physical challenge for him, yet he did it with a smile and amazing positivity.” Sensei is also proud to say that having Matthew in his life makes his life better. “There’s definitely going to be a void in my heart and in the dojo when Matthew graduates,” said Sensei. “Matthew is really special because he has decided who he wants to be. He is creating Matthew, which has been a big part of his personal evolution. He enriches the lives of people around him and he’s also being really true to himself.” Matthew has, in fact, been working really hard to be true to himself. In a world where he was born looking different than everyone else, he admits that some days are harder than others to get through. “I wish I could say that it’s always sunshine and rainbows, but it’s not. With stuff like this, you just have to learn how to be yourself and try not to act like you’re something you’re not. You’d have to keep that act up every day, which is really hard,” said Matthew, who often has to deal with spontaneous cracking, bleeding or extreme itchiness in the winter. “The most important thing is to stay close to your family and loved ones because they’re always there for you when you need help the most.” Denise and her husband Brian Culbert are certainly there for Matthew and are so happy to see him thriving – especially after his touch-and-go entrance into the
world. Within an hour of Matthew’s birth, the family was at SickKids hospital, where they remained for several weeks. “We had the fear of God put in us when he was born,” said Denise. “We were so grateful that we had a baby we could take home.” Epidermolytic hyperkeratosis is an extremely rare condition that affects approximately one in 250,000 people worldwide. Unfortunately, because of its rarity, no research is being done into a cure. Matthew grew up knowing he was unique and he embraced it. “When he was little, he thought he was special and different – he thought he had superpowers because his skin grows at a very accelerated rate and heals so quickly. Mosquitos also couldn’t penetrate his skin, so they wouldn’t bite him,” said Denise. “He saw it as a benefit.” The fact that he looks different, that people look at him funny or make comments was a challenge he had to learn to deal with. Denise said that she and Brian taught him at a young age that looking different was a good thing. “We always told him that he was lucky his skin disease was a visible thing, so that when people would meet him, they would know right away that he’s different; whereas if someone had something wrong on the inside, like their heart, people wouldn’t know,” she said. “Because of that, he could make true friends because they would know what he was like on the inside.” And what he is on the inside is pretty special.
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ALUMNI PARENT SPOTLIGHT
LYNN FACTOR FOR THE LOVE OF IT BY LAUREN MANDARINO
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Far left: Lynn is passionate about her job. She slept on the street for Covenant House.
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ome people are lucky enough to love what they do for a living. They likely never imagine, however, that their work will be recognized with a prestigious national award bestowed upon only a small group of Canadians. So it came as a complete surprise when Lynn Factor, mother of Jakson Inwentash ’12, found out at the end of 2017 that she had been named a member of the Order of Canada “for her contributions to the field of social work and for her dedication to improving the lives of our most vulnerable children.” “I had no idea that any of this was in process, so it was shocking when I got the call,” said Lynn, who was nominated by Valerie McMurtry, CEO of the Children’s Aid Foundation of Canada. “I’m moved, touched and extremely honoured. Honestly, it’s still a little bit surreal for me. You don’t ever really think about things like this. I just work and don’t think about the other end of the rainbow – it’s just not my style.” What is Lynn’s style is doing something helpful, something that might make a difference in a child’s life. Which is likely the reason Lynn chose the career she did. “I’m just a person who’s been giving,” said Lynn, who holds degrees from Ryerson University and York University. “Once I got into it, I felt that it was extremely important work and that I could actually make a difference in a child’s life, which motivated me to continue in this line of work. It’s been very inspirational and rewarding.” Lynn has been dedicated to the field for numerous decades, focusing on child welfare as a front-line social worker, supervisor, manager, philanthropist
Lynn loves spending time with her family, husband Sheldon, son Jakson and daughters Raquel and Nicole.
and leader. She has held roles at the Children’s Aid Society, the Superior Court of Justice, and she’s currently at the BOOST Child and Youth Advocacy Centre, where she works with child victims or witnesses – specifically of sex trafficking – to help prepare them to testify in criminal court. She also holds several volunteer positions including Past Chair of the Board of the Children’s Aid Foundation of Canada, Chair of their Scholarship and Awards and Youth in Transition Committees, a member of the Board at Covenant House and Chair of their Sex Trafficking Advisory and Policy and Stakeholder Relations Committees. Lynn also sits on the Community Engagement and the Modern and Contemporary Curatorial Committees at the Art Gallery of Ontario, and the Dean’s Advisory Council at both Ryerson and the Factor-Inwentash School of Social Work at the University of Toronto. Valerie McMurtry, CEO of the Children’s Aid Foundation of Canada, nominated Lynn for the honour after working with her for four years, and says she can’t think of anyone more deserving. “Lynn stands out in our community and in Canada for the work she’s leading in child welfare. It’s not an area that gets a lot of attention and she’s really trying to raise awareness,” said Valerie, who is extremely proud to have Lynn involved with the work that the Children’s Aid Foundation is trying to lead. “She has been an exemplary Canadian in an area that gets overlooked and deserves so much recognition for her tireless volunteer efforts. Her whole life has been devoted to this sector.” Valerie isn’t at all surprised that Lynn is humbled by the recognition.
“She’s very embarrassed and thinks other people are more worthy. That’s one of the things that makes her so great,” said Valerie, who describes Lynn as compassionate, thoughtful, generous and honest. “She’s a wonderful community builder and loves to solve complex problems, yet she thinks of herself as behind the scenes, when really, she is the glue.” Lynn’s son, Jakson ’12, is really proud of his mother’s achievement. “She is a remarkable person and definitely deserves it,” he said. “She tends to be very humble, even at home, and never makes a big deal out of anything. She sees it as something she has a passion and responsibility for.” Lynn and her husband Sheldon Inwentash are also big believers in giving back. The well-known philanthropists even endowed the Factor-Inwentash School of Social Work at the University of Toronto. “I think we have a responsibility to give back and I’m a firm believer in a collaborative approach to address a number of issues to do what we’re able to do,” said Lynn. “I’m in a bit of a unique position because I cover a lot of different issues since I volunteer, work in the field and we believe in being philanthropic.” Lynn and Sheldon’s giving ways have certainly been passed on to their three children. “My parents been a huge inspiration in my life and I hope that one day, I can do as much as they have,” said Jakson, who was the Community Service Prefect when he was in Grade 12 at RSGC. “I love giving back and I try to do community service whenever I can. I try to give back in any way I can now.” Lynn finds herself in a position of moving easily between the worlds of
frontline service work, volunteering and philanthropy. “Lynn is quite unique because she and Sheldon are leading philanthropists, but she also works,” said Valerie. “She travels in a circle with Sheldon and people are surprised that she still has a day job with a little cubby at the BOOST headquarters and helps these young people go to court. She’s got this high-end social life and a killer wardrobe, but has a day job in the front line of child welfare.” Which is exactly where she loves to be.
The Order of Canada is a Canadian national order established in 1967 by Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II. Admission into the Order of Canada is the second highest honour for merit in the system of orders, decorations and medals of Canada. The highest honour is membership in the Order of Merit, which is the personal gift of Canada’s monarch. Since its creation, approximately 6,000 people from all sectors of society have been invested into the Order. It recognizes the outstanding merit or distinguished service of Canadians who make a major difference to Canada through lifelong contributions in every field of endeavour, as well as the efforts by non-Canadians who have made the world better by their actions. It is a three-tiered order: Companion, Officer and Member. Specific individuals may be given extraordinary membership and deserving non-Canadians may receive honorary appointment into each grade. A member recognizes outstanding contributions at the local or regional level or in a special field of activity. Lynn Factor is a member.
The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 13
FACULTY SPOTLIGHT
GREG SEALE:
FINDING A PLACE BY LAUREN MANDARINO
G
reg Seale joined the RSGC faculty for the 2016/17 school year as the Media Arts teacher, taking over the Communications Technology program. He wanted to sit back for his first year, teach his classes and silently observe his surroundings while he found his place at the College. It didn’t take him long to find that place. In one year, Greg’s job has seen him become the Senior School Arts Department Head, the coach of the first swim team RSGC has seen in decades, an active leader of the tech crew for the Senior School play and a member of the School of Rock, a student-founded band/ music jamming club. “Last year was more of a feeling-out process to try to understand the culture here,” said Greg, who came to the College from the Bishop Strachan School. “Now, as the Department Head, my goals are public display and performance. They are so important – probably the most motivating factors – and I believe they will cause the quality of the boys’ work to go up.” His first step of public display and performance was the Senior School Arts Night, held at the end of February. The evening featured all facets of the arts: band, dramatic arts, visual arts and media arts. Even a few members of the School of Rock performed. “It was the perfect opportunity to make arts more visible,” said Greg. “The choir is the most visible thing that the arts does and we have a play once a year. This was a chance for the boys’ works to be out there. We put up 120 pieces – media arts, including some digital, and portraits. There was even a drama video playing in one of the classrooms. From a learning
Greg coached RSGC's first swim team in decades to numerous OFSAA medals.
standpoint, this is better than marks. Their work is actually seen.” Music teacher Emily Johnson, who started at RSGC at the same time as Greg, is thrilled with the direction in which he is taking the arts department. “I think we’re moving in a good direction in terms of creating more opportunities for the boys to display their arts,” said Emily, who describes Greg as supportive, enthusiastic and approachable. “We already have music performances built into the schedule, but to build on that and tie in the other arts as well is going to be a really big step forward.” Graydon Benson, Class of 2019, is a big fan of the Media Arts courses and loved the Arts Night. He had a challenging mental health piece on display
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that was a mixture of photography and custom-cut glass panels. “Arts Night was a great night,” said Graydon, who considers Greg’s classes some of his favourites because they allow him to think differently than in other courses. “This school needs to do more for the arts, and that was a huge step in the right direction. That night encompassed all of the arts.” Graydon loves the Media Arts classes because they offer a lot of freedom. In Grade 10, there may be units on photography and graphic design, for example, and by Grade 11, there is flexibility for the students to choose the areas on which they wish to focus. For Greg, he loves that, as a mandatory half credit in Grade 9, he’ll teach every boy in the school.
“They’ll see the full potential of what it looks like if they go through four years of the course,” said Greg, whose background is fine arts and art history. “Grades 9 and 10 are more skill-building, which allows Grades 11 and 12 to be more conceptual so the boys can make more choices. Throughout the whole time, there’s a fine arts focus – slide history, gallery-style art, etc. I want them to think about things like display, what artwork looks like and how you can challenge spectatorship.” Greg brings a unique perspective to the classroom, having worked in various facets of the arts. He has taught film and photography, and still works as an Adult Education Officer at the Art Gallery of Ontario in his spare time. He also sang in a punk band in his younger days. Graydon recognizes how lucky he is to be taught by someone with such a breadth of experiences, and loves having Greg as his mentor. “Mr. Seale offers a different twist to everything,” said Graydon, who, thanks to Greg, is looking into attending the University of Southern California’s Jimmy Iovine and Andre Young Academy for Arts, Technology and the Business of Innovation when he graduates from RSGC. “He challenges me in so many
different ways – more than just arts. He constantly offers new ideas from films to university programs. He’s got a lot of experience.” But despite Greg’s artistic talent, Graydon was still surprised to see his mentor get up on stage during the Hidden Gems concert and belt out Led Zeppelin’s “Whole Lotta Love” with his colleagues, including Emily, and some students. “I didn’t know he could sing, too – that was the last box to check!” said Graydon. “I thought it was great and I loved that he did it with students – it was really cool.” Emily certainly enjoyed the performance. “It didn’t feel like I was performing with my department head, that’s for sure,” said Emily. “He’s really willing to take risks and try things with the boys. There’s no hesitation with him to try new things
musically, and it’s also really fun to be able to connect and perform together as colleagues. We’re usually so focused on our work, preparing our classes and the boys, so it was a really unique experience.” As for Greg, he has certainly found his niche at the College. But the best part is that before he applied for the job, he had an idea about the culture of the school from his exposure to the boys through his job at BSS. And it has not disappointed. “The boys are the best brand for the school, so when I would work at the semiformal, it was always the RSGC guys who shook my hand and introduced themselves,” said Greg. “That’s when I got to know the school. The skeptic in me thought it was superficial. But when I got here, I realized that it’s the real thing. I spent last year getting to know that it comes from a pretty genuine place.” Which makes Greg the perfect fit.
Greg, colleagues and students performed Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love" at this year's Hidden Gems. The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 15
FEATURE
TIMESOF
TROUBLE
16 The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College
Georgians are known for their sense of brotherhood and duty toward one another. When a member of our community goes through a difficult time, the Georgian family comes together. Three stories from different periods in the history of the College illustrate this deep pietate. BY SUMNER & LANG
LEAN ON ME: THE CLASS OF 1977
T
he Class of 1977 is one of the most active among Georgian alumni. The members keep in contact over social media and email, get together regularly and turn out in large numbers at Old Boys’ dinners. Their 40-year journey together is one of dedication, friendship and coping with loss. In just over a decade as alumni, they lost three classmates. One of the first classes with “lifers” – students who attended the College from the earliest grade through to graduation – many of its 44 members went on to Western and Queen’s universities. Among those who chose Queen’s was Christopher Anderson, who came to RSGC in 1970 for Grade 7. Chris was a top student whose distinguished Georgian career included debating, choir, serving as Prefect, serving as Editor-in-Chief of the yearbook and graduating as an Ontario Scholar.
After graduating from Queen’s, Chris enrolled at Dalhousie University, where he had secured early admission to Law School. Soon after, his studies were interrupted when he contracted Guillain-Barré syndrome, a rare but serious autoimmune disorder that attacks healthy nerve cells in the peripheral nervous system. Then, while in Toronto undergoing treatment, he contracted leukemia, which led to his death in 1982. Chris’ loss was felt acutely by his classmates, many of whom had known him since their early school years. “It threw me into an existential crisis from which I have never really recovered,” said Rob McCann, who shared a house with Chris at Queen’s and visited him weekly in the hospital. “It’s not the way that life is supposed to go for your best friend. It was really bad.” The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 17
Guy Burry has been actively involved in ensuring the Class of '77 Legacy Fund continues to grow.
Guy Burry and Chris went all the way back to kindergarten. “Chris and I were together at Blythwood Public School in kindergarten,” said Guy. “I was an athlete and he was at the top of the class, but we had been friends forever. It was devastating for all of us. Chris’ parents had memorial funds directed to the College because it was so important to him, and most of us contributed to honour him.” After Chris’ death, the class moved on with their lives and careers, remaining close and often spending time together. Then, as they approached
Searching for Meaning When Andy Rodgers spoke at a memorial service for John “Robbie” Robinson and Dave MacLennan, he shared a quotation with the audience. Since that day, no matter where he has worked, he has posted that quotation on his office wall as a daily reminder of his friends.
their 30th birthdays, they faced another tragedy. On the August long weekend in 1988, John “Robbie” Robinson and David MacLennan travelled north to Andy Rodgers’ family cottage in Temagami, as they had done for many years. One afternoon, Robbie and Dave headed out in a boat with two other people to get some groceries. Midway through the trip, as they were turning a blind corner around an island, they met another boat coming right at them. Dave was killed instantly and Robbie died while in transit to the hospital in New Liskeard. The hours that followed were harrowing for Andy, who had been best friends with Robbie and Dave since Grade 6. He heard about the accident via CB radio, travelled to the crash site, where he had to identify Dave’s body, and then went on to the hospital, where he did
the same for Robbie. He then had the task of contacting the families. Once more, the Class of 1977 rallied together. Almost every one of them was in attendance at the memorial service held in the College chapel. They also worked together to find a way to ensure the support carried on. “I remember a huge group of us at Peter Meyrick’s cottage on Lake Simcoe after the memorial,” recalled Andy. “We talked a lot about what kind of people Robbie and Dave were. We wanted to ensure some kind of legacy for them. So I offered to contact John Latimer on our behalf.” John, who was the Headmaster at the time, was immediately supportive of the idea of a scholarship, and Andy worked with him to describe the sort of student who would best reflect Dave and Robbie. Andy put a letter out to his classmates explaining the plan and support started to pour in. Over 80 per cent of the class made a contribution, along with many of Dave’s colleagues at Dominion Securities. Throughout the 30 years that have elapsed since then, the fund was one way the class stayed connected. They also helped shape the fund with Guy’s leadership. A parent of Owen ’13 and member of the Board from 2006-2013, Guy is currently Chair of the Foundation. “We had these two smaller funds that could perform better if we consolidated them,” said Guy. “I spoke to a bunch of the guys and they agreed, so we created the Class of ’77 Legacy Fund, to which we still contribute. Our goal was to ensure the fund would grow while continuing to honour the memory of the three guys.”
“We cannot, after all, judge a biography by its length, by the number of pages in it; we must judge by the richness of the contents… Sometimes the ‘unfinished’ are among the most beautiful symphonies.” – Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning
Dave and Robbie were staying at Andy's cottage when they were killed in a boating accident.
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Class of '77 photos courtesy of Paul Clarke '77
In the above photo, Timothy McTague, left, sits with Dave MacLennan, centre, and Robbie Robinson.
The fund is one of many factors that class members point to when they reflect on the strength of their relationship. Cam Harvey, who was Head Prefect, points out that they have been deliberate about building on their strong foundation of shared experiences. “Our alumni network has been sustained because we have worked at it,”
he said. “It was difficult to track down emails for everyone, but we did. Many of us travel long distances to attend events. And we have never relied on one person to hold us together. It has always been a group effort led by guys like Peter, Guy and Rob, who have done so much.” Looking back, Andy also sees a link between their commitment to each other and time spent sitting in the Chapel as students hearing the Manners Maketh Men philosophy from Jack Wright himself. “When we were younger, we would kind of snicker at it,” said Andy. “But as we got older, we began to develop that sense in ourselves. I think that philosophy, combined with the fact that we grew up together, made us a tight-knit group no matter how different we were.” Rob also points to the adversity they faced together. “We were a close graduating class already,” said Rob, “And now, the shared memories of these three guys are always there in the background when we get together. When you go through that as a The Class of '77 still gets group, it provides a bond.” together to this day. “From the start, it was a priority for us to keep their memories alive,” added Andy. “I think we have achieved that by talking often about what was incredibly positive about them.”
BROTHERS IN ARMS: THE CLASS OF 1988
S
ome situations shine an especially bright spotlight on the remarkable nature of the Georgian bond. The story of Jonathan Hames ’88, who died on November 6, 2013, after a year-long struggle with esophageal cancer, does just that. The memorial service was held in the RSGC Chapel the night before the Old Boys’ Dinner, when the Class of 1988 would celebrate its 25th reunion. With a third of the class in attendance, Tim Logan and Pav Jordan eloquently expressed what everyone was thinking: Jonathan was warm, compassionate, thoughtful, strong and a true friend who would be missed.
From early November the previous year, Tim and Pav, along with Stuart Hatcher, Adrian Dafoe, their spouses and a few close friends of Jonathan’s, had formed a circle of love and support that Headmaster Stephen Beatty ’86 called “a remarkable example of pietate”. “Long before he was diagnosed, we knew how important family was to him,” recalled Stuart. “Both of his parents were gone and he was rarely in contact with his brother, so he spent weekends and holidays with us. When he got sick, it was natural for us all to start taking care of him. ” Stuart’s wife Stefanie adds that the Georgians were like brothers.
“They are all very different and they would knock heads sometimes, but they always circled back and worked it out,” she said. “They are all so unbelievably loyal to one another. So when one of them was down, they all rallied and the rest of us became part of the Georgian circle.” From the very beginning, the supporters were a constant presence, attending to Jonathan’s every need: his symptoms, many tests, diagnosis of cancer and treatment options. “As the situation grew more dire, Jonathan said to us, ‘I just want my friends around’,” said Adrian. “That’s all he wanted – to feel a sense of community. So that became our focus. It was one of
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the reasons we worked with the College to arrange a special section for our class at the Service of Lessons and Carols in December 2012.” Early on, the group also connected Jonathan to his network of friends through a Caring Bridge blog that Stefanie helped him set up. As his poet and press secretary, she kept everyone updated about his progress and reached out when he needed a ride to treatments in Toronto. She also shared messages from Jonathan, such as his request that everyone engage in random acts of kindness in his honour. When the blog wrapped up, there were 453 guest entries, and the postings from Jonathan/Stefanie alone took up 44 printed pages. As the year progressed, the core group continued to take Jonathan to appointments, have him at their homes and cottages or just hang out. There were also unique moments, such as when Pav took a week off to fly with Jonathan to the Deepak Chopra Center in California. Or when Jonathan’s close friends Tracy Mullin and Kim Tully began taking turns staying with him at his house. “By fall, it was clear that he wasn’t going to recover,” recalled Stuart. “That’s when even more Georgians and friends gathered around Jon. Some flew across the country to see him in the hospital, even people he had not seen in 10 or 20 years.” The visits continued after Jonathan was admitted to the ICU at Lakeridge Hospital in Oshawa ten days before his death, including from former RSGC Chaplin Father Michael Burgess, Headmaster Stephen Beatty and
The Class of '88 had a special section for Jonathan Hames at the 2012 Carol Service.
Jonathan’s brother, David. The nurses said they had never seen so many visitors, and the hospital had to alter its visiting rules to accommodate everyone. As Jonathan’s condition worsened, he was unable to breathe on his own and was in constant agony. Unsure how much time he had, the core group arranged to be there as much as possible, many of them travelling back and forth from Toronto daily. As with any group of close friends, there were light moments mixed in with the sadness, such as when Jonathan suddenly realized he had not said goodbye to his beloved cats. The team sprang into action. “The hospital wouldn’t let the cats visit because they had not been inoculated,” said Adrian. “I stood at the nurse’s station and thought, seriously? They need medical attention? So Kim and I picked up the two cats – one of whom wasn’t very
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friendly at all – and went in search of an emergency vet. We drove all the way to a clinic at Yonge and Sheppard before realizing it was too busy. Then we drove back to Whitby, where a vet agreed to see us at 10:00 pm. We had to say, ‘it’s not for the animals, it’s for their owner – it’s a unique situation.’ Then we reunited Jonathan with the cats for a snuggle in bed.” Jonathan had given medical decisionmaking authority to Pav and Tim, and they actively worked with him as his situation worsened. With support from the hospital ethics advisor, they helped him through the process of making a decision. “He never gave up hope,” said Stefanie. “He never once believed that Far left: Jonathan Hames at RSGC. Below: A more recent photo of Pav Jordan, Jonathan Hames and Stuart Hatcher.
this was his exit ramp, despite all the bells and whistles and tubes and machines. But he eventually came to peace and said ‘I can’t live like this’.” On the night of November 6, the group gathered around him to bring his suffering to an end. “There were five of us with our hands on him when the life support was turned off,” said Stuart. “He went
from looking 90 years old to smiling, as this unbelievable look of peace and contentment spread across his face. I think it was comforting for him to be surrounded by us. He died knowing he was loved.” Looking back on the experience, the group’s main sentiment is one of gratitude – for knowing Jonathan and being drawn together. And for the Georgians in
the group, there is also a sense that what unfolded was a natural extension of what they learned at the College. “We didn’t think twice about these kindnesses because these lessons were part of school life,” said Adrian. “Kindness is the rent you pay to live on this earth. You have seen each other at your most vulnerable. You have grown up together. It was just easy.”
YOU’VE GOT A FRIEND: THE CLASS OF 2015
S
tevie Boyd ’15 and his classmates found out in a hurry how much the strong bond among Georgians matters in times of trouble. In late August 2015, only two months after his graduation, Stevie and his parents were on a vacation in Iceland when his mother Shelagh Donovan was struck and killed by an amphibious vehicle while they were visiting the Jökulsárlón glacial lagoon. “Immediately after it happened, I didn’t know what to think or what to feel,” said Stevie. “I had left my phone at our hotel. When I got back to it, I had already received so many messages over Facebook and texts from friends, especially from the Georgian community.” In the weeks that followed, there was an outpouring of support from Georgians all around Stevie, many of whom interrupted their university orientation week to come back for the funeral. “I remember one moment in particular,” said Stevie. “I was coming into the church and made contact with Anthony Lisi ’15. It meant so much to me that he and the other Georgians were there.” Throughout his first year at Queen’s University, Stevie made lots of new friends, while keeping in touch with various Georgians. In second year, he moved into a house with Turner Garrow ’15 and Matviy Prokipchuk ’15, two friends who had been looking out for Stevie. “It was tough,” said Matviy. “I mean, what can you say? We just offered support through our actions – as any Georgian
would. We didn’t treat him differently. We just acted normally, looked out for each other, kept in touch.” “We don’t really talk to him directly about it,” added Turner. “We just always make sure he is okay. That he is not acting difStevie and his mother, Shelagh, in Iceland. ferent or anything. In first year, we didn’t see him every day, so it was harder, but we would make “There is a foundation of respect,” said a point of seeing each other every couple Stevie. “Each guy has a sense of respect of weeks. Then, in second and third year, it for the others and a caring for their was easier because we lived together.” well-being. It feels like such a connected Turner and Matviy see their natural network. It’s just something that we are.” inclination to be supportive as an extension of RSGC. “The school helps build a sense of brotherhood,” said Turner. “Mr. Beatty, the school leaders and the teachers always encourage the students to do things together like Evensong, advisor groups or special events. It contributes to the closeness.” “I think the varied demographic is another reason why the RSGC community is so down to earth and supportive,” added Matviy. “Many families sacrifice a lot to send their kids to RSGC because they believe in the school. The fact that the students come from various backgrounds really promotes humility and understanding.” As someone who has been on the receiving end of that support, Stevie agrees that it is what Georgians do for each other.
“Each guy has a sense of respect for the others and a caring for their well-being. It feels like such a connected network. It’s just something that we are.” – Stevie Boyd
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FEATURE
The Day the
TOWERS Fell
22 The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College
SEPTEMBER 11 happened almost two decades ago, yet it still feels like yesterday. A horrible day that changed the world forever, it’s one of those days where most people remember where they were when it happened. Two members of the RSGC community were impacted directly and agreed to share their stories with The Shield.
BY LAUREN MANDARINO
Cindy Barkway, Mother of Jamie ’17 and David, Class of 2020 Cindy Barkway was five months pregnant when her husband, Dave, a Managing Director of BMO Nesbitt Burns, had to go to New York for a business trip. Knowing that his trip wasn’t overly busy and that there likely wouldn’t be another opportunity to get away before the baby came, Cindy booked a ticket on points to join her husband in the Big Apple. The couple – college sweethearts who married in 1997 – left their two-year-old son
Jamie at home with Cindy’s parents, and spent a wonderful Sunday in New York, where they celebrated Dave’s 34th birthday. “We went to dinner and a movie. It was really nice,” said Cindy. “I specifically remember Dave saying he was getting old. Of course, that seems so young now, looking back.” The next day, Dave had meetings and Cindy walked around New York. They went for dinner together in the evening. That was September 10, 2001. The next morning, Dave told Cindy that he had a breakfast meeting. He kissed her goodbye and left for his meeting. Cindy had some time before her flight home that afternoon, so decided to go for a walk around SoHo.
“I was in a taxi when we could see that a building was on fire. There were all these people looking at the building and I didn’t really know what was going on,” she said. “I got out at the top of Soho and went into a store. That’s when I found out that it was the World Trade Center. I was just standing there thinking this can’t be true. I thought I should go back to the hotel and I figured Dave would be going back there too.” Cindy started to make her way back to the hotel, realizing that she had no way to get in touch with Dave. There were huge lineups at all of the pay phones and people were screaming. “I turned the corner and all I could see was dust. I guess that’s when the first tower came down,” said Cindy. “At one
Dave got to enjoy the first two years of Jamie's life, but never got to meet his younger son, David. The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 23
Dave and Cindy, college sweethearts, married in 1997.
point, I was walking behind a woman who had a cell phone. I heard her say that she had seen people falling from the buildings, but all I kept thinking was that I’ve got to get back.” With all of the traffic stopped and everyone trying to evacuate, it took Cindy a long time to get back to the hotel in Times Square. Dave wasn’t there. Shortly after she watched the second tower go down, Cindy heard from someone from Dave’s work. They had received a Blackberry text from him saying that he was on the 105th floor of the World Trade Center and that he needed help. “I was stunned. He was in the north tower at the Cantor Fitzgerald offices,” said Cindy. “I figured he had about an hour and a half to get out of the building and I truly thought he could get out. I was obsessed with watching the TV.” It was only when Cindy heard the Chairman and CEO of Cantor Fitzgerald speak that she understood that no one higher than the 90th floor would have made it out. “That’s when I realized that he probably died. Obviously it was very emotional,” said Cindy, whose parents had driven to New York at that point to be with her. “My dad wanted to go back to Toronto, but I wasn’t ready to leave yet. I thought I would be leaving him behind. We stayed a few more days and went to the Missing Persons Bureau to give in his toothbrush 24 The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College
and hair from his hairbrush for DNA and try to find out whatever we could.” There was no information to be found – and the hard part was still to come. When Cindy returned to Toronto, she had to face Jamie to tell him that his Daddy wasn’t coming home.
For a decade, Cindy went back to New York with her family for the anniversary of September 11.
“My sister brought him out and I just about fainted when I saw him,” she remembered. “I was sad for myself that I had lost my husband, but I was very sad for my kids that they had lost their father. But I also knew that I had to take care of myself so I could take care of my kids. “That first week, I never felt hungry or tired. I think I was just in shock. My mom would tell me when to go to bed or eat. I finally remembered that I was pregnant and I had to look after the baby,” said Cindy. “Trying to sleep, eat healthy and exercise gave me focus. My boys have been my focus to help me get through this. I didn’t want this horrible thing to define their lives and I didn’t want to be sad or angry all the time.” When the baby was born, she named him David, after her husband. The first year was certainly a difficult one, but Cindy made it through, focusing on getting through one day at a time with the help of family, friends and a wonderful community around her. In fact, she never spent a night alone. She speaks to Jamie ’17 and David, Class of 2020, constantly about their father, and his photos decorate their home. But Jamie has no memories of Dave and, obviously, David never had the chance to meet his father. “I feel like I know a lot about him and what he was like,” said Jamie, who attends McGill University. “Family members and my mom tell me stories and great things about him.” For a decade, Cindy took both boys down to Ground Zero to visit the site and see Dave’s name etched on the memorial. As things got busier in the teenage years, she and the boys would volunteer somewhere for the day. “I wanted them to know what happened, but I didn’t want them to grow up angry or anxious about it,” said Cindy. “I
just try to parent with love, support and compassion, and be there as much as I can.” Cindy has had to wear many hats as a single parent. “You just sort of step up to the role you’re given,” she said. “Sometimes I think I don’t know if I can do this, and other times, I know I can and I’m pretty proud of my two boys and where we’ve come.” Jamie is certainly proud of his mother. “She’s an incredibly strong woman and she has done a great job at both parts of the parental spectrum,” he said. “She raised David and me really well, pushing a lot of the same ethical and moral ideologies on us that RSGC does.” As for Cindy, she continues to push through day by day, embracing her boys and the community surrounding her. Her smile is genuine and lights up her face, although not a moment goes by that she doesn’t think about Dave. “Life is hard and sad,” said Cindy. “You can’t always control what happens to you – you just try to do the best you can with the obstacles that you face.”
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Mary Garafalo, Mother of Connor MacDonald, Class of 2021, and Alexander MacDonald, Class of 2024 On September 10, 2001, Mary Garafalo remembers being at a dinner party, thinking how per fect her life was. With a great job as an investigative reporter for WNYW, Fox 5’s flagship news station in New York City, wonderful friends, a loving husband, Angelo MacDonald – who adores her – and a baby on the way, Mary felt like she was on top of the world. And then the whole world changed. On the morning of September 11, Mary, 14 weeks pregnant, wasn’t feeling great, so she decided to sleep in and go into work a bit later. A frantic Angelo called at about 9:00 am, right after the first plane hit the World Trade Center. Within minutes, Mary had her journalist cap on and was in a taxi on her way to the site. “Nobody knew what was going on – everyone thought it was a little plane,” said Mary. “Traffic had just stopped. It was literally like the movie Independence Day. Everyone had gotten out of their cars and was looking up. We all saw the second plane hit the tower. I got out of the cab and started running down towards the tower.” Mary, whose cell phone wasn’t working, found a pay phone to call her office and let them know she was a few blocks away. They warned her not to go there because they were under attack and sent a car for her and a crew to go cover the story from the airport. “We got to the airport and there were helicopters, tanks and 300 police in full riot gear with interlocking arms, holding shields and pushing everybody out of the airport onto the highway. If you dropped your purse, you couldn’t even go back 26 The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College
As an investigave reporter, Mary covered stories like the Gulf War, Waco and 9/11.
and get it,” she recalled. “I had to report live and I didn’t even know what I was reporting! All I could tell you was what I could see: there are tanks and there are dogs.” At this point, no one in Mary’s life other than Angelo and their doctor knew that she was pregnant. So when Mary started to bleed by late morning, she didn’t tell anyone. “At that moment, you’re not really thinking. You’re just being a team player. It was the biggest news story of my life, of our generation, so I convinced myself that I was just spotting,” said Mary, who has also covered stories like the Persian Gulf War, the Bill Clinton/Monica Lewinsky scandal, the Waco Siege, the Susan Smith murder case and the Sicilian Mafia in Italy. “But as the day went on, I was bleeding really heavily. If I was in pain, I didn’t know – I was running on adrenaline.” Eventually, Mary’s crew started to realize something was
Memories from the Class of 2002
wrong. She told her cameraman that she was pregnant and that she thought she was having a miscarriage. When they were finally released at 4:00 am, they tried to get back into Manhattan to get to a hospital, but all of the bridges were closed. After much convincing, a police sergeant drove Mary – who was prepared to walk across the bridge on her own – to a hospital, where Angelo met her. Mary said that all of the hospitals were on high alert and remembers that the one she went to was full of staff. Every doctor was in. “But I realized that no one was there except for me because nobody survived this,” she said. They did an ultrasound and found that there was no heartbeat. They wanted to do immediate surgery, but Mary would have
none of it – not when she knew the story of a lifetime was still happening outside the hospital doors. “I said ‘what? I can’t go to work tomorrow?’ They said no because I could go into spontaneous labour at anytime. I left anyways and went home. I went to work the next day and was absolutely catatonic. No one knew except for my cameraman.” Mary went to the hospital at the end of the week for surgery. She now has two beautiful sons, Connor MacDonald, Class of 2021, and Alexander MacDonald, Class of 2024, both of whom were born in New York. Her investigative prowess and determination have earned her seven Emmy awards. Her husband Angelo still adores her. But Mary will never forget September 11 and all of the people who were lost.
As I recall, the first vague news we heard of a plane running into the World Trade Center came at the end of an assembly in Ketchum Hall. Like many who heard the news that day, we first assumed this was about an unfortunate private pilot in a small plane. There was a TV in the grad lounge in the Senior School, one of the only ones around that actually got a signal, and several of us decided to stop by to check the news before our next class. That’s when the gravity of what was really happening hit us. Eventually, Dr. Newton wondered why none of his AP English students had shown up for class and went looking for them. When he found us and saw the news, he was stunned. We sat and watched in shocked silence as the towers collapsed one after the other. In an era of smartphones and constant connectivity, it is now difficult to imagine back to a time when an event of this magnitude could happen and people only learned about it hours later. But that’s how it happened for us. One by one, students and teachers alike trickled into our small, now packed, windowless grad lounge and watched the world change on a small TV in the corner. I don’t think anyone went to class that morning. — Chris Roscoe ’02
The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 27
FEATURE
Have Backpack, Will Commute Lessons of the Road and Rail from RSGC Students and Alumni BY SUMNER & LANG
I
Many a trip continues long after movement in time and space have ceased. —John Steinbeck 28 The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College
f you’ve ever experienced a long commute to work, you know what the daily trek can bring: traffic stoppages, public transportation delays, unpredictable weather and conversations with unusual characters. You may be the tranquil type, accepting every bump in the road with ease and grace. Or you may be a little less composed and shake a metaphorical fist at every offense and interruption of your journey. In either case, may the spirit of John Steinbeck’s words be true: there is much to be learned about life from such daily adventures. That is certainly true for the RSGC boys who cover great distances to get to school and back every day.
FOLA FATOLA, CLASS OF 2020 The Class of 2020’s Fola Fatola is one such voyager. Fola is up by 5:00 or 5:30 am every morning and out the door by 6:15 in order to make it into school by about 7:30 am. He shares his morning commute from Brampton with his mother Derin (who rises at 4:00 am!) and his sister Farah, who attends the Bishop Strachan School. After school, Fola makes his own way home via public transportation: subway, GO bus, city bus and then a ten-minute walk. The trip takes about two hours. “For the first part of my home journey, I’m with some friends on the subway,” said Fola. “But they slowly drop off and then it’s just me on the GO bus. Sometimes I do homework or listen to music. There’s no WiFi on the GO bus, so I’ll download my homework at school or at Yorkdale station. You learn to be organized for a long journey!” Does he ever wish he went to a school closer to home? “Not at all,” said Fola. “I love going to St. George’s. Headmaster Beatty asks me about my commute all the time, and I remember once saying to him, ‘it’s like coming home.’ Crazy weather like snowstorms can make my trip as long as four hours! But my classes are worth it, the teachers are so nice, and I’m in the debate club, the Gamerz Union and the judo club. I’m used to the travel and don’t even think about it now.”
RICKESH KOTECHA ’00 Rickesh Kotecha ’00 is one of those “so nice” teachers Fola appreciates – and also a former pro commuter. He attended RSGC for Grades 7 to 13 before heading off to the University of Waterloo to study economics and math. After attending teachers’ college at OISE in 2006, he returned to the school in 2007 as a business and accounting teacher.
As a young student, Rickesh travelled to RSGC from Ajax. Like Fola, he had to be up with the birds and usually wasn’t home until 6:30 or 7:00 pm. “After a brief period in Grade 7 when my dad did some driving, the rest of my time commuting was spent on the GO train and subway,” said Rickesh. “I played sports, so I would be in for early practices and sometimes games would go late – those made for very long days! I would sleep or do homework on the train.” The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 29
Rickesh has one special memory from his train travelling days. “Father Peter Hill was the Chaplain at the College from 19891999, and he also lived in Ajax,” he explained. “I would sometimes see him on the train, and he helped me navigate the system a few times. I’m grateful for that. He made things easier when I was pretty young. I’ll always remember Father Hill.” Rickesh believes his commute helped develop his personality in more ways than one. “Over time, I became very selfsufficient,” he said. “My long commute helped with that. It also helped shape my identity as a morning person. My father didn’t believe in sleeping in, but it’s more than that for me. I’m aware of how precious time is, and I really value early mornings.” That said, Rickesh is more than happy to skip the long commutes these days. “Many years ago, I told myself, ‘If I ever work at RSGC, I will never take the GO train!’ I kept that promise to myself. Now it’s just the subway or I can walk, bike or run. I still treasure my mornings, which are sometimes filled with basketball practice. That’s just fine with me!”
NICK BLANCHETTE ’94 Nick Blanchette ’94 agrees that a sense of independence and the capacity to plan and think ahead were natural outcomes of his commute to school from Oakville. “Like a lot of my friends who navigated the city by bus or subway, I developed a strong sense of selfreliance,” explained Nick. “There were frustrating days when I would ask my parents, ‘Why can’t I just go to the school down the street?’ But at the same time, I knew how lucky I was. Some of my close friends today are St. George’s guys. Plus, I would take the same train as one of my best friends, Andreas Merath ’94. We really bonded during the trip.”
How Was Your Commute to School? I took the streetcar across St. Clair, the train down to Bathurst and then a walk to school. Unless the weather was nice – then it was an awesome downhill bike ride all the way, with an awful uphill climb home. – John Cimba ’85
Nick also travelled to school with his three brothers: Mike ’92, Drew ’96 and Phil ’98. Andreas’ older brother, Marcel Merath ’98, was a friend of Phil’s, so there was a daily crew. “We were all very different from each other,” Nick explained of his brothers. “We did share an interest in athletics, but the school gave us all something different. There was a place for each of us. Though one thing all of us got out of the school – and the commute – was confidence.” There were a few growing pains along the way, however. “I remember in Grade 7, RSGC hosted a big soccer tournament,” said Nick. “We billeted a few guys, and when we took them on the train to go home, we got mixed up. Instead of going to Oakville, we went the other way and ended up in Pickering! I was young and travelling was still a big deal for me, and we totally blew it. But that’s just life. You learn and carry on. There’s value in those experiences.” The value of travel for all of these long-distance warriors, past and present, is plainly evident in their stories. They would not trade their experience for the ease of walking to a local school. Nor would they give up what continues long after movement in time and space have ceased: independence, forethought, appreciation of time, lasting bonds and a sense of coming home when they arrive.
30 The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College
Riding the subway from Eglinton through Yonge/ Bloor to Bathurst with a hockey bag on the back, school bag on the front, hockey stick in one hand and trombone in the other. I was like Moses parting the Red Sea as I descended the stairs at Yonge/ Bloor station between the Yonge Line and the Bloor/Danforth Line. No way could you accomplish or even attempt that now on the subway. When I rode my bike to school, I remember riding up the Popular Plains Road on the way home when I rode my bike to school. Ouch that hurt. – David Bourne ’89 Walk from Vaughan/Bathurst with Metallica’s “Ride the Lightning” blasting on my Walkman… I remember it like it was yesterday. – Christiaan Piller ’94 I walk 18 minutes from my door to my classroom. On rainy or wet days, passing cars will regularly soak me by driving through deep puddles at top speed. I would like to find these drivers and kick them in the shin. – Stephen Dame, Grade 7 teacher I walked from home to the Brampton GO station, took the train to the Bloor station and got on the subway at Dundas West. In those days there were only four trains in in the morning and four out in the evening. If hockey practice went too late, I’d miss the train home and would have to go to Yorkdale to take the bus home. – Paul Overbaugh ’85
Retrospective 2010s
Births
Adam Aucoin ’14
Omar Rajani ’95
After completing his undergraduate degree in English at the University of California, Berkeley, Adam has accepted an offer of admission to the Juris Doctor program at the University of Toronto Faculty of Law beginning Fall 2018. Good luck, Adam!
Want to share your latest news, proud moments and achievements with the RSGC community? Send details to shield@rsgc.on.ca
Omar Rajani and his wife Natasha are thrilled to announce the arrival of their daughter, Malai, who was born in Toronto on January 19, 2018. Big brother Zain is excited to share his toys with his little sister.
Liam Brown ’09 Liam and his wife Elizabeth Bennet are overjoyed at the births of their twins, Liam Alexander Dalgleish Brown Liam then the 4th (6 lbs. 3 oz.) and Gertrude Tabatha Dalgleish Brown (6 lbs 7 oz.), who entered the world on September 12, 2017, at Toronto’s Mount Sinai Hospital. Liam and Elizabeth are extremely joyful to have two healthy babies in their lives and hope to send their son to RSGC for Grade 3.
Liam now
Are you looking for help with your "what's for dinner" dilemmas? Aidan and Camden, Class of 2025, can help. These young boys are creating a community cookbook featuring 50 recipes that are: • Quick and easy • Easy for kids to make • Delicious for kids to eat • Made with easy-to-find ingredients The book will retail for $25 and will be out by Mistletoe Market. Make sure you get a copy! Reserve now at cookbook@rsgc.on.ca. The Shield Spring 2018 • Royal St. George’s College 31
In LovIng MeMory
Danya LeeMhuIs november 28, 2003 March 9, 2018
Father Scott and Headmaster Stephen Beatty ’86 meet for tea in the Headmaster’s office.
Love Changes everythIng
authentic, artistic, empathetic, versatile, knowledgeable, imaginative. We asked each boy to describe himself in just six words. Their answers were as diverse and as individual as the school itself; a place where each boy is challenged and inspired to become the best version of himself.
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