Water Cooler and Pillow Talk R.A. Smith
PublishAmerica Baltimore
Š 2010 by R.A. Smith All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior written permission of the publishers, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review to be printed in a newspaper, magazine or journal.
First printing
All characters in this book are fictitious, and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental.
PublishAmerica has allowed this work to remain exactly as the author intended, verbatim, without editorial input.
Hardcover 978-1-4512-1276-1 Softcover 978-1-4512-1377-5 PUBLISHED BY PUBLISHAMERICA, LLLP www.publishamerica.com Baltimore Printed in the United States of America
I would like to first like to dedicate this to my family, whether on purpose or inadvertently, they have always pushed me to strive to be better. To my true friends who told me things I needed to hear and not what I wanted to hear. For my biggest “critics� Allison, Lia, Camille, Teri, and Maria, and Deanna thanks for being sounding boards. To the number one Fraternity Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity, Inc., thanks for helping to shape me. Last but not least, thank you to my Lord and Savior for my many gifts and talents.
ABC’s of Poetry Assanine anecdotes aligning and alluring Breaking bread belligerently beneath broken bows Casually cascading copiously continuing cohesive connections Entangled enchantingly, enduring every engagement Feeling fun filled frolicking freely Gathering great grounds, grasping generously Hoping hovering heathens help hungry hosts Intermittently intertwined ingeniously interveningJust jumping jovially, justifying juvenile jabbering Kinetically kicking kolo knitting knickerbockers Maintaining masculinity motivating miscreants Never naying nor nearing negative nuances Opting only obvious objective opinions Perhaps perfecting peaceful paciferous paces Questioning quaeritur querist Realizing rudimentary rations run rampid Treading too thin thinking terrible thoughts Untimely users ushering ugly utterings Verily voicing vindictive verbage Wasting woefully while willingly watching Xanthic xenogenic xerics Yelling yoicks Zestfully zenlike zealots zanyism
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All I had What if a pen and a pad was all I had How could I conquer feelings good and bad Would it be enough, maybe not I’ll just contemplate my next satirical plot Ideas of drama and lust it seems Would that be enough to whisk me into a dream Could I scribe to be full of financial wealth Or in perfect harmony and spiritual health Would it be to much to imagine myself a king Surrounded by jewels and fancy things Maybe pontificate the possibility of a pious one perhaps Granting sovereignty and favor and filling other gaps What if a pen and a pad was all I had How could I resurrect the joy from sad How could I undo the unjust and right the wrong Is it as simple as an anecdote or festive song Maybe to rule the world in all its splendor Or fulfill every arduous conquest with feelings of grandeur Could the lines I write be simply enough To undo misery and bad feelings and stuff To change your feelings with a simple wave of my hand If I believe, I can achieve just as long as I have a plan
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Ice Cream All dressed up and nowhere to go lookin all good and stuff tenaciously seething of I mean you got the goods love But then the fighting starts all of a sudden you SCREAM then I SCREAM Now things don’t seem so sweet Before, I licked my fingers now, I can no longer stand the sight what once was what I begged for no longer tempts my pallet the dream it seems has come to an end that ice cream dream has been replaced sincerity is at a depreciable decline dropping like the Dow funny how that works what I used to long for I long for no more all from one scene for you diminish and demean within the decibel of a futile scream
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TEASER Trickle down Honey brown Delectable confectioned perfection Semi-glaze, caramel hazed Damn… You such a tease But please Can I have another Mother like Down right Nurturing… To the point that You bring me JOY But damn You just a tease But please Can I have… Another Smother me Cover me In your tangled web Oh what you weave While you don’t deceive Only tease But please Can I have… Another.
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Tell Me… Hours of texting Anticipated meetings Tell me. Haven’t we met before Sensing the familiarity while getting reacquainted Reunited and it feels so good Tell me Why has this meeting taken so long Got me thinking of you at odd times Because you GOT IT Tell me What is it about you Enchants, enthralls, and entices me All without skipping a beat Tell me What is wrong with the men out there To pass you by and not recognize Realize the amazing woman you are Tell me How can I keep you smiling…
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Melody of Passion Summer love songs in my head Can’t seem to get that scent from my nose I hum to myself that same song she sang Damn…this is two days old Red is her favorite color, but it’s truly symbolic My heart begins to control my mind Oh how I love thee, truly love thee Cupid couldn’t shoot a bigger arrow I’m in a whirlwind Mind boggling tailspin Can someone put notes to my feelings Chart topper Beat dropper This should be a number one hit Opus to the gods Symposium to the stars I hear the melody of passion.
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Whisper Infatuation Scented odors of grandeur Grade school crushes Do you like me? Check yes or no Childhood fantasies, so innocently engaged Oh how the mind plays tricks Whimsical feelings, fluttering butterflies Just one look makes my heart race Untamed spirit, youthful desires I don’t know what’s come over me Heightened sensations, turned teenaged enamorations Why do I feel this way Traces of like, hidden by coyish smiles Locker room gatherings, showering after the game My dad would be so disappointed
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Me Recuerdas Remember me now Remember me then Remember how we used to‌ Way back when I wish there were room in your heart for my love again Maybe if then was now and now were then I lost sight of what I had And what I had is now gone I am man enough to admit my mistakes And one day carry on.
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Are You For Me Innocently enough, we started as friends But as time grew, our time together, I didn’t want to end From this point on, we’ll become closer and better acquainted With nothing but a beautiful, meaningful picture to be painted Now when I think of our relationship, I often sit and smile Should we try to be more than friends, or maybe wait awhile? Yet and still no one really knows me quite the way you do The way you pick up on my every thoughts I can’t explain it, can you? At this point we are now closer than friends Remembering our time together, it appears to be well spent From your gorgeous personality, to your silly ways From your teenage years to your older days From your eyes, to your lips, to the toes on your feet I begin to want more from you, but I need to know Are you for me?
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I Like Having You Around What is it about you that keeps me on my feet You know like you favorite song with the phattest beat No matter what mood I find myself, even if I’m down I always enjoy your company, I like having you around You are someone who shares my ups and downs No matter how hot my head gets, you correct that ugly frown You scolded me at times that I very much needed it I often kept my foot in my mouth because it seemed to fit You are my friend, advisor, and confidant I think I have something precious, what more could I want Whether in body or in spirit, In or out of town You are someone for whom I have great respect I like having you around.
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Little Big Man No outside J’s for me Up close and personal is my wish Strictly on the inside, slapping the glass is how you finish Yeah jumpers are kool, the pretty release shows finesse But you take it to the hole, aggressive and strong No need to second guess My crossover breaks you down As I am destined to complete my goal I shook you right, then took you left Don’t reach playa, finger roll If you reach I’ll teach A lesson well taught is one well deserved As I break you down again You can chalk this up to experience Game over sucka You’ve been served
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What You Do Phenomenally phenomenal is what you are Astrologically speaking, you are my shining star Where ever I am, I sneak a thought of you Then a devious smile appears as I think of things you do Your gentle touches and kisses make my body scream‌ I am yours for the taking This is not about sex But strictly love making.
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Addicted Is this love or just mere infatuation Maybe just a deep fondness or admiration Does she see the depths of my mental? Or maybe her feelings are vague and supplemental Could it be she’s just addicted? When she sees me, is she thinking of the flowers that I bought For times that are just because, not making up after we’ve fought Does she remember how near I am to her heart? Does she even think of us together, when we’re apart? I definitely think she’s addicted Addicted to what the dick did after I licked at the clit Before I made her so hot she begged me to hit it Addicted to the stroke and the thrust of my penile The way I made her stutter and shake as if she were senile Addicted to what the dick did as I slowly went inside Giving her injections of semen inflections as she rides When we are finished and she’s resting all nestled in bed Are there visions of flowery fields running through her head Nothing but addictions To pleasurable pain inflictions While under the pillow her head hid Not love Jones dreams, but drug Jones scenes Because she is addicted to what the dick did.
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My Gift To You Love, come close to me Let me smell the scent of your sweet bodily nectar Let me breathe every fragrance of you from head to toe This is my gift to you So your every wish is my command As I give you gentle kisses Let me rub your tired shoulders From carrying the heavy burden society has placed upon you Can I rub those tired feet that have walked miles in other men’s shoes And then some Close your eyes As I lay you down upon rose pedals like the queen you are to me Don’t move I’m at your every beckon call As I caress your body and cleanse your mind Let me take away all the negatives Replacing your mind, body, and soul with spiritual libations This is my gift to you
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I Want To Make Love I want to make love to you Not hit the skins, bump and grind, or something animals do I want to make love to you because you are the love of my life I want to make love to you because you are my future wife I want to make love to you so you have that heavenly glow I want to make love to you and scream your name so the whole world will know I want to make love to you, not to show you what I can physically do I want to make love to you because spiritually, mentally, physically, and emotionally My love for you is true
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A Love Story They say the eyes are the key to the soul, look deep and tell me what you see In my mind’s eye, there is you and I, we share eternity We have grown together, you’ve taught me as I have taught you Isn’t love a wonderful thing when it’s true Like the many ripples in water, when a pebble hits a pond My love for you is countless like a maternal bond It started out so innocently, you and I became friends Did we make the right decision, well that depends I let my feelings show, was it on purpose or a well planned slip We looked into each others eyes, then we touched lips Just think, we used to take our friendship for granted It’s amazing what a simple kiss can do, it’s wicked, yet enchanted Now for us it seems nothing is left to chance You make my head grow fonder, even catching you at a glance It might sound strange, or even funny to say You’ve been immortalized in my mind from the very first day As I look upon our feelings there will be no second guessing God has put us together, we have his blessings
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Thanks Mom For believing in me, when I said I wanted to be a football For making me feel better when the jello took a fall For putting forth that extra effort to make sure we had For the times he wasn’t there, taking the place of dad For bringing joy to others while the hurt inside doesn’t show on your face For not sparing the rod as to spoil the child, and keeping me in my place
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The Morning Dash As the alarm rings to wake me at the crack of dawn I contemplate hitting the snooze as I begin to yawn Still remembering how good you felt last night I am suddenly bothered by the morning sunlight I rollover to see your angelic face as you sleep There’s still time, so back under the covers I creep Like Siegfreid and Roy, what beautiful magic we made As Shirley Murdock sang, As we lay The birds start to chirp and sing, as I caress your sleeping face How could any one man allow himself to leave this place BEEP BEEP BEEP, that’s the snooze, my last wakeup call As much as I hate to do it, out of bed I crawl It’s getting late, so I give you one last kiss before my descent You are my morning sunshine, my ray of light, so decadent
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Wordly Charismatic character cooperating calmly Kindly kicking it collectively with Kindred kinfolk condescending and Cohesively connected in cahoots
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Hershey Tantalizing in all HER ways SHE is Showing HER elegance SHE does Dark chocolate is HER skin SHE shows I’m loving HER and SHE knows Setting the mood suits HER so SHE sways Swagger on a billion is HER style SHE says Dynamically set in HER ways SHE goes Brown sugar is HER complexion SHE bodes Fiery wit about HER and SHE plays Intellectually sexy shows HER style SHE portrays Big is HER heart SHE truly cares I’m with HER and SHE with me, we make a great pair
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So You A Gangster Waving your dick beaters in the air Lips stained from obscenity You call the giver of life a hoe Hardest on the block Quick to grab a glock Ready to strike down YOUR brother Real gangsters don’t dance So you bob your head What are you trying to hide Quick to kill a nigga Because you gotta maintain your rep Oh, I see, you were hiding your white sheet Who’s the real killer Sayin I aint hard because I care for mine You aint felt pain until you fuck with my family Got ya nine in ya pocket and ya ready to ride Peer pressures a bitch aint it Mad at the world cuz YOU can’t get right So you rob and steel from your own kind 40 guzzlin weed smokin gun totin carry your bitch ass to Iraq and let my boys come home.
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Missing You I’m missing you ooo ooo ooo Can’t shake the feeling because it seems like forever Holding you in my arms when we were together Don’t wanna shake them cause these feelings warm my spirit I’m missing you ooo ooo ooo Simply irresistible is the feeling you give me Making me feel like i’m the one and only Jumping into my arms fills my heart with pleasure I’m missing you ooo ooo ooo Silently awaiting my tasks to be done Patiently awaiting as i reveal frustrations and conundrums You are a very beautiful woman I’m missing you ooo ooo ooo Back in my arms is where you will soon be From now until then seems almost an eternity But good things come to those who wait
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Innocence I wanna go back Back to when life was simple Kissing made you pregnant Staying outside was kool And friends lasted forever Truth hurt, but soothed the soul The family sat down to eat dinner And they had each other’s back Back when… The only thing to worry about at sleep overs were scary stories Parents had to call you in the house from playing Your word was your bond When girls wanted to be like mom And boys wanted to be like dad Prayer was still allowed in school Disputes were settled with your hands at 3 o’clock Only to end up playing together the next day I wanna go back to when life was simple… Back to innocence
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Through Her Eyes Torn and battered yet a fragment of the man I used to be Down trodden by the plight of so many before me But through her eyes, I exist as a mighty Pharaoh ready to lead I look in the mirror to see only a shell of the youngster I used to be Losing a step here and there while pretending to still be down But through her eyes I am the man, ready to take on Michael Jordan in his prime Not feeling as strong as I used to, my childhood bones don’t move like they once did What used to be a six pack is looking closer to a keg But through her eyes I am superman, ready to take on the world Through her eyes, I find strength, courage, wisdom, and happiness She can brighten my day and soothe my soul with just a smile My strength comes from knowing I can be all these things If I can just picture myself through her eyes.
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Gang Related Are U.N. or out of my gang I mean, if you aint down for my colors, you can’t hang I wear my colors proudly, and even wave them all around These colors don’t run and they will never touch the ground I’m much bigger than a crip or blood, my colors run too deep Hell, I got people leaving their families behind to do a nightly creep You want in don’t you? I can even make you fight for my cause I can tell because when my head man speaks, he always gets applause Just turn on the news, some bustas always hatin on my crew. They hate me cause they aint me, I just shake them like the flu. They can’t fade me, they cant even feel my flow All it takes is my man to give the signal and I’ll have control of their land and their hoes You young bucks think you doin’ work or know what it takes to get down I’ve taken land, raped masses, and slung bricks, so for starters, how’s that sound I’ve turned over more drugs and committed more heinous acts Don’t mean to toot my own horn, just check your history books for those facts You crips, bloods, and other gangs, to me, you boys are a joke I have armed forces at my disposal to hide my keys of coke So, the next time you in your hood, tryin to rep your territory Remember that I’m the man, and you will always be a bitch working for me Holla back Uncle Sam
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Love Love changes, Rearranges To make you Not really you Doing things you said you’d never do For someone you barely knew Emotional strands Unlike holding hands Takes you to un-chartered lands Heart beating to rhythmic bands Tame me Shape me Mold me Into that which u long to be Or be with In the end, just tattered shards Battered and scarred Remnants of things that used to be How empty of me To be so full of you.
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Stir It Like Coffee Damn Mami, move them hips Hypnotizing a brotha as you lick those lips Can I get a taste? Don’t mean to think with what’s below my waste But ma, you got me sprung Like a flower to a bee, baby I’m stung I cant even keep this sexual Damn, I’m even captured by your intellectual You got my mind in a world wind Outer body experiences causing my world to spin Mami you know you got me shook You can read me like one of Oprah’s books Warming my soul while stimulating my brain Mocha latte caramel, or creamed frappuccino in an hourglass frame The way you walk, you stir it like coffee The way you talk, damn, what you do to me Insatiably needing my fix of caffeine Coffee stays on my mind, I know, I sound like a fiend Just trying to sit and concentrate while goin without Is like the earth tryin to survive during a 40 year drought I don’t even wanna think of her without me Mami do that thing you do, just stir it like coffee
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Hmmmm (untitled) Hickory dickery slim slickery Tom foolery, Jim Crow, new world order trickery Smoke and mirrors at a populations expense World control on a real life monopoly board just don’t make sense No child left behind, because their being sent to fight Stealing educational dollars for a war that ain’t right The government at hand needs an enigmatic cleanse Since they’re watching, let’s pull out our microscopic lens To look deep within the bureaucratic bowels That’s if we can stand the stench and foul
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In The Name of Love Trial and error of a new life Indigenous to all else Extra sensory love smells in the air Turns even the foulest stench to roses Crazy in love or so it seems Until She screams He screams They both scream Which ruins the dream But love conquers all… Right? Cyclical trends makes her compromise And him bend To the point of a chess match Beginning to lose herself To be there for him Or him giving up dreams To be by her side Causes nothing but a stalemate But in the game It’s a shame For it’s all in the name… Of love.
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We Real Kool We real kool, we hung tight Friends to the end, understanding the other’s plight Knowing his fam as he did mine Hangin with him and wifey to wine and dine We real kool, we hung tight He got different views, but he’s alright Smoking his weed that was stashed in a dresser Trying to succumb his boys to a little peer pressure We real kool, we hung tight It all came to an abrupt end, one night Trying to remain friends, because I wanted to be the bigger That is until he chose to call me…
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A Touch of Jazz Subliminal melodic jazz solo got me feelin… Niiiiiiiice Silky sensual slow soothing sax sends shivers Love drenched high, so bad I can’t come down Mo betta than Bleek Doin the right thang to me like Spike And I just can’t stop grinnin I’m spinnin Cause I’m in a daze, Neva needin that purple haze… To get me entranced and entangled hung up and dangled you just don’t know what you do to me got me smilin and skippin like a catholic school girl thank you can I get another please smother me please with your worldly ways got my shades to hide the gaze you create as you touch my spirit ever so gently I move as I hear it Your lovely sound Has me bound Feet stuck to the ground But my body language tells a different story Taking in each bit Like a pipe hit Note for note, Tryin to catch it From Davis, to Coltrane Parker to Marsalis Gone cat daddy do what u do I got my fix, so I’m good for now Yeah I know… The first one’s free…
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Canal Street Take me down Canal Street Inhibitions runnin wild Heated breaths, sped hearts Bring muscle contractions to their peak What really goes down Canal Street Where London bridges don’t stay up for long Anticipated depths Syncopated reps Of movements How far is it till Canal Street Is this what you were expecting Ritualistic passions Creates animalistic satisfactions As reality seems to subside You won’t find this on mapquest Next stop, Canal Street Sequential body spasms Caused by intrinsic splashes of orgasms Directly orchestrated To touch every sugar wall Until you fall Asleep Sweet dreams I look forward to visiting again…
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Serenity—Just Toying With Words Tranquil breezes Blowin trees is All I need to Reminisce Light fandangos in the sand Dripping mangoe sticky hands Keeps me holding My smile Fancied freed feeling frisky Frolicking aimlessly being risky Watching kittens Being free Wondrous feelings possessed emotions Glorious smells of obsessed potions Reluctantly fading In the wind Wish I may wish I might Gazing boyishly in the night Hoping to find My star
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Bigger Than Mine Staying away from the church for many reasons Seasons change and so do the excuses Trying to separate church and state And alleviate the politics from the pulpit But somehow that’s never really the end result Out with the old blood and in with the new Who knew Their cross was bigger Than mine I’ve searched to see just how to make mine bigger But then I figured That their cross is no bigger Than mine Knowledge is power and he that holds the most is king StriKING, shocKING, JacKING Your brain For the knowledge it seems Collecting riches while redirecting your hopes and dreams But still I figure What makes their cross bigger Than mine To my Lord and Saviour being the glory My cup runneth over… Yet, another story I am now back to the church No more excuses This little light will shine Because the Lord is my Shepard And I’ve finally figured That through this life’s journeys That their cross is never bigger Than mine
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Song Without Words Waiting for a melodic voice While jazzin to a harmonic track Double decker high hat Bass drum boom clack Sultry single notes to wash the melancholy away No rhyme or reason No words to say But syncopated jives making the head and neck respond Intrinsic tunes taking away your daily world Finding it hard to remember what even troubled you Getting the point across… Without…words… Toe tapping vibes bringin back memories Bobby Blue But far from Bland Easy listenin making it easier to hear Unspoken words passing through my ear Finger tappin Hand clappin On some ole Calgon take me away Thoughts and feelings revisited It’s a soul trip man Feelin grown yet hip man Miles got me listenin Marsalis got me whistlin They say music tames the savage beast I’m at ease now Got me feelin Like WOW Keep on talking those unspoken melodies
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My Write Mind Soft music playing Notes gently stroking my soul Man, dig that funky baseline Collective soul, chased with a hint of gospel Amaaaaaazzzzziiiiiinnnnn Graaaaaaaaace, How sweet, the sound Melodic intoxication helps to get me in the Write Frame of Mind My time, Me time, Quiet time Crawl in a ball, under the blanket time Can get me in my Write Mind Masturbatingly stroking my pen To get, It seems, My mind to make love to my paper Not now But right now Damn, can I just Write now Let me stroke a little harder My pen swiftly becomes my sword The music pumps as the baseline thumps I’m reaching my denouement Jot this phrase, scribble that phrase I can feel my pen begin to climax My eye twitches, As the beat switches Like Bleek Gilliam, I’m finding Mo’ Betta Blues My pen wiggles and jiggles I’m now in a zone No, Don’t touch me This is some gooooooood sh@# I’m seeing graphic ideas Turn to satirical plots Me and my pen metamorphasize into one
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I don’t need a doctors help I’m feeling inebriated Yet rejuvenated I’m in my Write Frame of Mind.
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How Do I Love Thee How do I love thee Let me count the ways That you show me blatant disrespect Blond ambitions, turned blind intentions Oh, was it something I said? Did I put you on the wrong side of the bed? Or, were you there waiting for company like misery? Suddenly alone doesn’t sound so bad. She loves me, she loves me not I think not, if it has to be like this Can’t I just have my happy ending now? Miss Cleo, you should have told me about this wild card Psychic friend to the shooting stars that fly by night Wait! Don’t I get a wish? You are in my head like a Jedi mind trick Damn, maybe it was something I did. Dream a little dream, of fairytales it seems Where is my perfect life?
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Deep Inside Let me look deep within you, gazing into your eyes as if to see your most inner thoughts. I see pain from the last brother who did you wrong. Honest my queen, I’m not like that. I see walls and barriers up so high that need to come down like Berlin_ Can I touch you? Not touch you in the physical sense, but rather wipe away those tears you cry, behind closed doors because he said no one else would want you. And you believed him. Let me not break down those walls, instead sculpt them into the goddess I see before me Can I hold you? Not just hold you with these masculine arms, but hold your heart and resuscitate it back to the rhythm where it longs to be Hold your mind, that you are free to hold your head up to be the proud queen that you are Can I love you? I know what you’re thinking. I’ve done all this, just to get a little something’. But woman, if you let me, I would finesse you, caress you, and undress you. And that’s before we took off any clothes I can show you what true love is to the point that your mind, body and soul could be one and your heart would do rhythmic beats that take us back to the motherland. Can I?
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Mind Walk Sittin here grinning, cause I’m daydreaming and I’m thinking of you Mesmerizing photographic memory-thoughts of you in my arms Care to take a mind walk with me? I picture grassy fields with autumn leaves as they begin to turn You run into my arms as if in a scene from a movie. How perfect you are, as the only words spoken are I love you. What a breath of fresh air, as I take in each scent of you. Each word you speak is a melodic note Reality calls me, as I can’t help but to want to stay Here with you is where I would love to be No primal thoughts, as I’m lost in your love immersed in naturistic scenes The sun is setting, what a beautiful time this has been Hardly anything was said, but I heard you quite clearly I can’t wait to take this walk again.
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Una Carta a Dios Dear Lord, what is my purpose in life Am I to conquer some trial tribulation or strife Since my time on this planet earth I’ve often wondered if I was a mistake or a planned birth Should I live my life as a pious man Or commit sinful acts by the devil’s hand What is my destiny oh Lord, I need to know Shall my wisdom intensify, my horizons grow Will I ever love or be loved by another One with whom life’s answers I am able to discover When my inquisitiveness desires to be quenched, I will write again But for now I am satiated, in your name I pray Amen…
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What if I Said No When you asked me if my love for you was true If I said no, what would you do? If you asked if you were the only one for me If I said no, could we no longer be? When you asked if you had that special place in my heart Would you take offense if I said no from the start? Would you stop there, or, would you continue to ask Could you muscle still those strong emotions and complete your task Would that broken heart simply wither away? Or would it conquer this caverness depth to keep my heart at bay How hard would you fight for my love you once had How much did you really love me, do you want me that bad?
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Lets Cry Together The cards are on the table, and now the ball is in your court I did my dirt in the past and now yours is beginning to surface I think I need a timeout baby Raging thoughts run through my head as I watch him gently stroke you With his pen Sick sick dreams, of interludes, it seems, with you and him I want my boo back Words were exchanged in heated breaths blown in the wind This roller coaster ride aint no fun I see your shouts and I raise you two more Wait, this is going no where Now days have past and I begin to miss you as you pretend To ignore my existence I see your tears as I pretend to look away It pains me to see you hurting My eyes swell, as my vision begins to blur from What a man’s not supposed to do Fuck it, come into my arms, I still love you I have plans for you and me This teary canal seems to wash the heavy weight from my heart Now I wipe your tears, as you wipe mine I’m glad we cried together.
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I Desire I watch you as you lay there, your body warm to the touch My mouth begins to salivate because I want you so much I can’t help but to want you because you look so good It’s almost sinful to have this strong desire, I wonder if I should There’s a beautiful aura around you, almost a sensual steam I’ve longed to be alone with you, even in my dreams Anything that looks this good, can be bad, so they say I guess I’ll live for the moment, because I want you today I long to taste each part of you, I hope I’m not disappointed You’re my fantasy, a pleasant fetish, as with oils you are anointed Slowly you come closer to my lips, but this is the switch My sinful desire is not a woman, but my Philly cheese steak sandwich
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Da Me Give me your tired, your hungry, and your meek Give them a proud voice that they may speak Give me the strength to conquer the system that is unjust I have no physical plan, I simply know I must Give me light that I may bring others out of the dark Let the revolution now be televised, give me that spark Give me morals and goals that guide me in how I live Let me always accent the positive and alleviate the negative Give me a circle of friends that empower my way of life Let them have my back as I have theirs, not willing to stab me with a knife Give me freedom courage and wisdom to stand as a proud black man Let me be not afraid to shed blood and tears for the causes in which we stand Give me a melodic voice to soothe the tension, in the midst when times are hot Let me feel free to sing because I’m happy and even when I’m not Give me the spirit to enrich those I do and don’t consider my brother Let me be that role model for them, like mine is my mother.
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Right Back to You Metaphoric schemes, insatiable love scenes Leads me right back to you Angelic visions of tranquility turn to demonic dreams But leads me right back to you Thoughts of fantasia in the depths of my mind Lead me right back to you Deep passionate kisses while grooving to music hard to find Leads me right back to you Mine eyes have seen the glory of the beauty of the stars at night And leads me right back to you Isometric dimensions in the corner of my mind while imagination takes flight Leads me right back to you Inebriated feelings as I am drunk with love Leads me right back to you Orgasmic wet daydreams when it’s you I’m thinking of Leads me right back to you Longing to be with you again even though you are by my side Damn, can I just back to you Tearful reunions, escapades of grandeur when it’s to your heart I confide I am finally back to you.
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Can I Talk to You Can I talk to you for a moment? I mean delve into your mind until I’m not only a part of your conscious But subconscious thoughts. Let me place into your mind Only thoughts that could be imagined by Alice, As she took her trip down that rabbit hole Can I talk to you for a moment? I don’t want to talk at you I want you to reciprocate the incandescent feelings I bring to you That light up your heart like a firefly in heat. Can I talk to you for a moment? I mean talk with you That we may share an embrace in our minds So passionate and deep that we need to catch our breath, But our clothes are still on And the only thing to make contact is our eyes Can I talk to you for a moment?
51
Reminiscing Red light, green light, 1 2 3 Oblivious to life’s problems, feeling carefree A much simpler time, for a girl and boy I’m about to take you back to experience my joy Playing outside all day, not a video game insight Just as long as we were home before day turned to night No major drug problems, everyone played nice We got our fix from dancing and sports, music was our vice Trying to take you back to when you had true best friends Not ones that went behind your back, but were true to the end Let’s not talk about disrespect, Every parent raised the village and put you in check Penny candy was a penny and the food you ate didn’t make you sick For what ailed you, you got cough syrup, which normally did the trick I wish this generation could see how we saw, and do what we did I know a lot of problems would be solved, and kids could still be kids.
52
Ripples From a Pond Recollections from way back when Simple days of yesteryear No justice, no peace Maybe trying to get a piece Not a care in the world Just going with the flow Like‌ The ripples from this pond Laid back skipping Silly thoughts and careless wishing That i had a million dollars Or maybe just one to buy some ice cream Life was so simple then, Way back when Like the ripples from this pond Hot summer days Long summer nights Holding hands Just waiting For that first kiss But mom said you can get pregnant! Dream a little dream, Under a starry sky scene Aimlessly wandering in my mind Like the ripples from this pond
53
Addiction Past time loves got me thinking back to yesterday Enough to make my lingering foul mood dissipate Remembering my happy place As I’m whisked away in a daydream, It seems Like a hypnotic induced scene Reflecting on my past addiction Not a drug Jones But a love Jones Got me high just thinking about it Daydreaming and I’m thinking of it Can’t be blue because I’m dreaming of it Wish I may, wish I might Damn, can I get a do over Like Mary J I’m reminiscing Like Jodeci got me fiendin Damn why do I have to be lactose intolerant…
54
Spare Change Hold On, Change is coming Hey brother Can you spare some change Spare a little change for me To make it Take it To turn my life around Can’t you see I’m down on my luck The man don’t give a fuck About me You see I need some change Spare change Any change A change Brother’s going to work it out Hell I got some old change But that change don’t count I need some new change Dawn of a new day New way Change going to sway People to change The way they think Now I feel it in my bones So for now I just hold on Because I know Change is coming
55
Just Breathe Thinking of the night before Got to get this out of my mind Images of the things we did and said My beating heart like rhythmic drums Just Breathe Traces of your fragrance permeate the night air Calling to me like a drug addiction Captivated by the smell of you On me Just Breathe Whimsical flashbacks intermittently intertwined For the moment I’m lost in memory Ok, this was only one night I have to remind myself Just Breathe Like second nature I reach for the phone Wondering what you’re doing now Scared to take a shower as to not wash away you’re sent I’m like a fiend waiting for his next fix Still wondering how I remind myself Just Breathe That ole black magic has me in its spell But the pain hurts so good I know I’m not supposed to say never, But damn I ain’t never ever felt like this Can’t gather my thoughts Feeling faint… Just Breathe I don’t know if I can go through this again But I could never say no Hypnotic, erotic, sensually irresistible That thing you do has me sprung This is maybe too much for one man All the while I’m telling myself Just Breathe
56
Searching… Infinite thoughts tend to cloud my mind Would there ever be a “soul mate” for me to find Tried and true playing life like a game I’ve looked everywhere, but come back to the same Same conclusion, Illusion Or mystical fantasy Searching for the one My one The end all To be all She is to me as I am to her Only because together We get it They say when you search you surely will never find But, who the hell are they THEY have said a lot of things I think this time THEY may actually be right But do I blame myself, or THEY While I don’t NEED that soul mate One sure would be nice to have around But then again, THEY say… A soul mate is only in your life and then is gone Is that what I really want Being a man, I feel I’m already complete And no one can help that but me But there always seem to be a part missing So until further notice I’ll maintain the thrill of the hunt And maybe forever… Be Searching…
57
2ND CHANCE If only then was now But would I have more regrets Would I be thankful for what I have Or still want a do over Should I have kissed her a little longer In the bathroom of her mother’s house Or went with her to the marines Would she now be my spouse Would we both now be happy Or still having what if dreams Maybe I should have studied harder and made better choices Would I still need a second chance to clearly hear those voices Dare I say it I wish I could go back Changing a few things here and there to get on track Unmaking decisions that put me here Or maybe I would make them again That’s my biggest fear Even when I’m unhappy, I still appreciate my life I’ve had many great experiences to compensate the strife For now I’ll keep dreaming Thinking of what I could’ve had But when I really think about it Life really ain’t that bad
58
Say It On the phone with my girl She wants me to Say It I laugh because I’m with the guys So, lovingly I decline Walking through the mall She kisses me and wants me to Say It I smile and walk because others are watching And lovingly decline I notice her smile diminish Because I won’t Say It Her kisses aren’t as sweet anymore But now, lovingly I try I’m on the phone with my girl I want her to Say It She laughs because she is with the girls And without remorse Declines…
59
Sip Honey dew dripped Sweet delectable nectar Nature’s confection with a mature brown complexion Can I take a sip How do I compare thee Some stop and stare as we Take in the delight of Our libations of love My lips fiend for you Punched drunk in love boo Like fine wine I take you in Can I take a sip
60
So… As to not get it twisted I insisted That she knew who I was And she said So… A definitive blow To my male ego As she goes… Sauntering by Um listen right I’m not your typical fly by night Average type And I’m really feeling you She paused And said So… Again, another blow To my male ego So I had to redirect Interject And come very correct If I may Might I say That you and me Would make a perfect WE While I understand you’re not perfect I’m digging your imperfections To the point that I don’t want you to be right So maybe tonight If it’s alright We could Talk Then she said So… What’s your number 61