http://felixonline.co.uk/archive/IC_1953/1953_0050_A

3

EVERY FORTNIGHT

No.

SO.

2 9 th. M A Y

1953.

I M P E R I A L

50

C O L L E G E

NOT OUT I

5 2 NOT OUT The Road Test of Boanerges The Great (described l a s t t o r n by Royalty as "an amazing contraption) was c a r r i e d out on 20th t'.ay i n the presence of a multitude of adr.drers, a f t e r an even l a r g e r m u l t i t u d e had desperccd, tired of w a i t i n g • A c c e l e r a t i o n t e s t s were performed, motor cycle escorts being ased to record t h e speeds reached, while stci watches (by courtesy of T.C.A.C ) indicated the ti-os.

An unfortunate tendency on the p a r t o f the crowd to Bpreaa across P r i n c e Consort Road almost lead to , severe accidents.

On one occasion when t h e crowd partedj to let Bo through at 28 m.p.h. i t was seen t h a t there were s e v e r a l cars i n t h e centre of t h e road, r i g h t in Bo"s pathHe swerved and avoided them.

An i n t e r e s t i n g competition: an a c c e l e r a t i o n t e s t 0-5 m.p.h. between Bo and J . Edward T a y l o r (1949 Triumph 500).

Bo won e a s i l y .

A number of r e g u l a r Bo d r i v e r s were p r e s e n t , as w e l l as s e v e r a l l e a r n e r s , and the opportunity was taken of holding t h e Boy D r i v e r s Championship.

This was in two parts, t h e f i r s t being a Le Mans S t a r t , in which the d r i v e r and c o - d r i v e r had to run across P r i n c e Consort Road with the"starting handle, start Bo who was on the other side, and drive back to t h e i r original p o s i t i o n .

Fart two of the Championship was a c i r c u i t - of the. A l b e r t H a l l , this being a t e s t of s t e e r i n g and accurate speed judgement.

I spoke t o the winning co-driver, Mr. Jasper A s p i n a l l , hot.and flushed a.fter h i s victory.

I offered "No thank you." he said,_"T dpnH him a c i g a r e t t e . smoke very o f t e n , but whsn I do I'm choosy."

After the Road Test, the Motor Club took Bo round Hyde Park and to Buckingham Palace, to give the learners some experience.

A correspondent reports: "The roundabout in front of the Palace seemed to delight Bo, and very few pedestrian casualties were incurred on the second time round.

"The H a l l had made a stout e f f o r t t o be worthy of the honour now being bestowed upon i t and here the general ovation nearly drowned the noise o f Bo and h i s horn, but not quite.

"Nelson's column took the unaccustomed v i b r a t i o n of earth and ether very well.

One t r i b a l chief from the upper Congo, however, mistook a Bo gear change for the mortal cry of a wounded hippopotamus, and was last seen sharpening his teeth on the National Gallery r a i l ings."

1

' SPORTS'

DAY

The Rag Committee has organiied a Hop for Sports Day, 8 - 11.30 p.m.

Admission i s Is., the proceeds to be devoted to the fund for purchasing an I.C. Mascot Phoenix (Herbert) I t i s reported that impecunious dancers may obtain admission on presentation of: 1 pint jbeer in bottle, 1 policeman's helmet, 1 live fish more than 3 inches long, 1 bath tub, 1 five barred gate, 1 guardsman's bearskin, 1 Imperial State Coach, or on* other Coronation Souvenler of sufficient interest.

There w i l l i l e o be 90 unaccompanied young ladie3 present,

ft

U.L.

NEWSPAPER.

In c o n t i n u a t i o n o f the p r e s s conference held i n the v a c , student editors met the U.L.U. president again on Friday 22nd.

The reports of the four main College papers - P i , King's New,s, Beaver and Felix - were heard.

The tone of these reports was cautiously optimistic with the exception of Beaver (L.S.E.), which was definitely enthusiastic about the idea of restarting the "University,".

Background: The f i r s t U.L. paper f a i l e d l o r want of staff.

The second one f a i l e d f o r want of support that was two years ogo.

This time i t i s expected t o get s t a r t i n g s a l e s o f 5000, and more l a t e r when the paper s e t t l e s down.

P l a n s : The paper i s t o be about "Evening Standard" s i z e , eight pages of newsprint, p r i c e 1-M- or 2dReporters and s a l e s managers w i l l be appointed i n each of the c o n s t i t u e n t C o l l e g e s , while the o f f i c e s w i l l be ,in or about t h e U.L.U. b u i l d i n g .

The E d i t o r i " l Board w i l l c o n s i s t of an E d i t o r , a s u b - e d i t o r , the news, sport and features a d i t o r s and the Business Manager.

The business side w i l l be handled l a r g e l y by p r o f e s s i o n a l people, and w i l l look a f t e r a d v e r t i s i n g , p r i n t i n g , c i r c u l a t i o n , block-making etc • P r e l i m i n a r y surveys regarding the cost o f printing and d i s t r i b u t i o n , contacts w i t h a d v e r t i s i n g agencies etc. are going ahead, and the r e s u l t s w i l l be known in about a fortnight.

The Colleges in the meanwhile have been asked t o enlist the necessary support, t o find people w i l l i n g to do jobs on the editorial and the sales sides, and i n general i n the words of the U.L. Prosident Alan Tate, t o spread the glad tidings.

B U R N I N G P R O B L E M .

An amusing i n c i d e n t o c c u r r e d a t the annual H o l l a n d C l u b v e r s u s S e l k i r k H a l l c r i c k e t match a t H a r l l n g t o n l a s t week.

A member o f the H o l l a n d C l u b was h a t t i n g , and was s t r u c k on the t h i g h b y a b a l l d e l i v e r e d by Graham (Get-em) G a l e s .

A puff o f smoke r o s e from the u n f o r t u n a t e batsman's pocket.

W i t h c h a r a c t e r i s t i c B r i t i s h phlegm he went on b a t t i n g w h i l e a match box i n h i s p o c k e t burned m e r r i l y .

However, he was persuaded by h o r r i f i e d w i t n e s s e s t o remove i t and i t was seen t h a t a l l t h e matches had exploded , s i n g e i n g h i s T h i s s t o r y i s q u i t e above board, pocket s l i g h t l y . and w i l l be supporte d a t any time by the C a p t a i n o f the S e l k i r k S l o g g e r s , John, Duke o f E l l i n g t o n (3 C i v i l e ) , who has a c q u i r e d n o t o r i e t y owing to his p e r s i s t e n c e i n t e l l i n g i t .

Our Roving Correspondent

Reports:

I t has not been o f f i c i a l l y denied that there i s to be a notice-board i n every room of t h e Hostel Neither i s i t known whether prizes are to be given f o r t.h* b«n+ answers t o the HoBtel Entry Application Form.

The Mew Imperial College blazer, designed to f i t i n with the garish Coronation name posters on the fronts of the Colleges, i s to have "IMPERIAL COLLEGE" written'in s i x inoh yellow letters on the back.

F E L I X

PROFILE

c

e n t e r t a i n m e n t s c o m m i t t e e

CHAIHUAN: C.J. M e r r i e s (C I G) SECRETARY! I.W. J o f f e (C * G) UMBXRSs Miss J . I . F i n d l a t e r (R.C.S.) M.A. Chempnay (R.C.S.) B. Wyatt (R.C.S.) M. R i c h (G t G) t h e Shrtertainments Committee has i t s annual begin n i n g s , on t h a t obscure Old Lounge notice-board which seems b e t t e r f i t t e d f o r the times o f S e r v i c e and Holy Communion than f o r the e l e c t i o n n o t i c e s of such temporal p o s t s as I.C. Entertainments.

I t i s surprising to find that I.C. has had an Entertainment Committee f o r only a few y e a r s .

Who ran the hops and organized the Commem.

B a l l i n the pre-I.C.E.C. days?

The C o m i t t e e has a b i g r e s p o n s i b i l i t y , f o r they are i n charge o f the one phase o f Union a c t i v i t y i n which a m a j o r i t y o f the C o l l e g e take part.

It i s only at t h e hops f o r i n s t a n c e , t h a t many students have an opportunit y o f meeting people o u t s i d e t h e i r own year .

Apart from running the P r e s i d e n t ' s and Oomnsa. B a l l s members o f the Committee are p r e s e n t , l o o k i n g a f t e r t h * mike or a m p l i f i e r , at a l l C a r n i v a l s , Club dances and Debates e t c . i n which t h e i r e l e c t r i c a l equipment i s used.

I n the summer a dance i s h e l d by the Committee f o r overseas students who are i n England doing vac. work.

T h i s year they have the c o n s i d e r a b l e task o f arranging a Coronation B a l l which w i l l c e r t a i n l y be the biggest land, i t i s hoped, the best f u n c t i o n ever h e l d i n t h e Union.

In the p u b l i c i t y and t h e t i c k e t s , the Committee have a l r e a d y shown imagination and c a r e , which augurs w e l l f o r the B a l l i t s e l f .

C,J.HORRISS. K i t M o r r i s s was born i n Somerset i n 1929 and spent h i s e a r l y childhood i n Malaya.

He returned t o England H i s experiences on and was educated at Oundle School. a course at the Outward Bound Sea School caused him t o choose the Army f o r h i s N a t i o n a l Service, where he became 2nd/Lt. and served w i t h the Sappers i n Egypt.

I n 1950 he f i r s t set h i s foot i n t o the C i v i l E n g i n e e r i n g Department at G u i l d s .

H i s childhood voyaging has l e f t him w i t h a love o f t r a v e l ; a lov e which has been f u l f i l l e d f o r K i t has h i t c h - h i k e d and worked h i s way across most o f W. Europe.

Swedish farms, Spanish Railways and French r e b u i l d i n g have a l l r e c e i v e d h i s a t t e n t i o n .

He once even worked i n England - dustman at the F e s t i v a l .

K i t became Chairman by sheer bad l u c k .

A late nominee f o r the Committee he was e l e c t e d S e c r e t a r y , then Chairman and t h r e e Committee members f a i l e d t o r e t u r n so K i t was e l e c t e d Chairman at the beginning of the s e s s i o n .

He has run cross-country - played squash f o r I.C. but only when the could f i n d no-one e l s e - he says.

H i s l i k e s , o b v i o u s l y headed by T r a v e l l i n g (and the a s s o c i a t e d p l e a s u r e s ) , i n c l u d e E r i e L i n k l a t e r and Van Gogh.

H i s d i s l i k e s are few but vehement - p i c t u r e s o f f l o w e r s and people who conduct loud Bridge post-mortems in a quiet Union Lounge.

He has been quotedas saying e i t h e r "Gorgeous women are a nuisance". or "Women are a gorgeous nuisance" which he a c t u a l l y s a i d i s uncertain.'

The E d i t o r Emeritus.

SEVEN THE

I.W.

JOFFE

I . W. J o f f e was born i n Johanesburg i n 1930 and i s At King Edward V I I the son of an o l d Guilds-man.

School i n Jo 'burg he played the f i r s t o f h i s s e l e c t i o n o f s p o r t s - rugger.

At Rhodes U n i v e r s i t y C o l l e g e where he studie d economics he played hockey.

I n 1949 he came to England t o take the Intermediate Year at I.C. and i s now i n the 3rd year C i v i l E n g i n e e r i n g .

At G u i l d s he gained h i s c o l o u r s f o r rowing but now pushed h i s c a r f o r e x e r c i s e . He w i l l be r e t u r n i n g t o S. A f r i c a t h i s summer w i t h the T r a n s - c o n t i n e n t a l e x p e d i t i o n .

His c h i e f i n t e r e s t s number t h r e e .

Two show r o o t s i n S. A f r i c a the t h i r d i s U n i v e r s a l . They are - Modern A r c h i t e c t u r e , R a c i a l P o l i t i c s and Drama Students.

THE REST OF THE COMMOTEE Janet F i n d l a t e r i s t h e o n l y l a d y member o f t h e Committee.

Her nimbleness as d i s c - j o c k e y at t h e hops i s only surpassed by her s k i l l on the A t h l e t i c F i e l d .

When at s c h o o l , i n Slough, Janet won the A l l England Schools long-jump championship and sinc e she entered the Botany Department i n 1951 has run and jumped w i t h great success f o r I.C. snd U.L.U. At the I n t e r V a r s i t y s p o r t s at Birmingham r e c e n t l y she broke t h e l a d i e s long jump record .

Her i n t e r e s t s n a t u a l l y i n c l u d e a l l forms o f e x e r c i s e end u n u s a l l y Janet has an i n t e r e s t i n Campanology and m u s i c a l Instruments.

Maurice Anthony Champney came t o R.C.S. w i t h a Royal Studentship i n 19 49 and i n 1952 c o l l e c t e d a 2nd C l a s s i n Chemistry.

He i s now doing research i n a lab. w e l l known f o r i t s 'atmosphere".

M.A.C. entered Union a f f a i r s i n 1951 when he was co-opted as Dance Secretary.

He has served again t h i s year i n t h i s post and i s r e s p o n s i b l e f o r t h e t e c h n i c a l s i d e of the work.

H i s i n t e r e s t i n dai c i n g r i s e s c o n s i d e r a b l y higher than a " h o p - s h u f f l e " f o r he has been e l e c t e d Hon. Sec. of the Dancing Club f o r next s e s s i o n .

Indeed he l o v e s t o have someone i n h i s arms - h i s hobby i s Judo.

Mike R i c h entered I.C. i n 1951 but has an i n s a t i a b l e i n t e r e s t i n the 1st year course.

Mike i s another o f t h e Entertainments Committee who has strong connections abroad.

He was born i n M e r t o l a ( P o r t u g a l ) and came t o England i n 1939 t o be educated at M i l l H i l l School.

Somewhere i n t h i s l i f e spent h a l f i n P o r t u g a l and h a l f i n England K i k e R i c h has acquired the somewhat unusual h a b i t of wearing thre e p u l l o v e r s throughout t h e year.

I t may have been h i s lov e of m o t o r - c y c l i n g t h a t s t a r t e d it.

B r i a n Wyatt a l s o had s c h o o l i n g abroad - i n C a i r o and Aberdeen.

He entered I.C. i n 1951 t o study Entomology a f t e r wasting two yes.rs i n the R.A.F. as a Radar Instructor.

He has h e l d the post s of A s s i s t a n t Hon. Secretary t o the S o c i a l Clubs Committee and Hon. Sec. of the R.C.S. Boat Club and i s u a l l y seen and heard at College Debates. llext year he w i l l t r e a d the l i g h t f a n t a s t i c w i t h Maurice Champney, as P r e s i d e n t o f the Dancing Club.He l i k e s Music, Opera, Theatre and Dancing.

Brian i s a l s o the only expert on Salvadore D a l i on the Coramit* H e d i s l i k e s record request programmes; people who c a l l spider s i n s e c t s and having t o u n r o l l h i s umbrella. e e ,

So r,.Ui is, f i f t y i s s u e s o l d , coming, I hope, hrlo the prime of i t s e x i s t e n c e , l'hose who were at c o l l e g e on the day when from the l i t t e r of umpteen h o s t e l rooms t h e r e emerged a very s c r u f f y k i t t e n , l o o k i n g l i k e a l l other k i t t e n s , i t s eyes L i k e man's, a woman's ages number seven gumed up, i t s f u r p u f f e d up l i k e a young c h i c k e n , t a k i n g very B e f o r e her o r b i t shapes i t s c o u r s e t o Heaven. short steps on such unsteady l e g s . A bundle of mischief.No wonder t h a t we a l l loved i t and took t o i t at once. How we The f i r s t , u n c o n s c i o u s , I n a b l i s s f u l s t a t e laughed at i t s fir'st w i l d springs chasing leaves blown by the She wends a t r a n q u i l way t h r o u g h Cow and S a t e , wind or ideas which as q u i c k l y whisked away. How eagerly we And l i k e d e a r Granny (mumbling i n her c h a i r ) awaited the next appearance t c see v/hat scrape i t had got i n t o .

She d o e s n ' t know h e r a g e , a n d doesn't o a r e .

I t was not very Jong before t h i s c r t could get -round v e r y n i c e l y by i t s e l f ; i t stayed out at n i g h t s , changed i t s c o a t , The second now; with f a t and s t i c k y f i n g e r began lo have r e g u l a r h a b i t s . I n f r e t i t began to grow up, She hunts t o f i n d what S a n t a Glaus w i l l b r i n g 'er passing through a p e r i o d when i t was very s e l f - c o n s c i o u s , each cup She has her p r i v a t e k n i f e , and spoon, and e d i t o r t a k i n g h i m s e l f rather s e r i o u s l y , but not f o r l o n g .

And l i k e s t h e w o r l d t o t h i n k t h a t she's grown up. Good 8 : i r i t s , i r r e p r e s i b l e humour, and the desi*e t o look i n t o every m i l k b o t t l e and mousehole, i n c l u d i n g the r e f e c t o r y The t h i r d , t h e s c h o o l g i r l c l a d i n b l o u s e and s l i p , k i t c h e n s , kept i t running very sanely on t h e whole, perhaps S p i t t i n g a t a l l the b o y s , and l e a r n i n g how t o s k i p . too sanely. I t s p u b l i o became c r i t i c a l of i t s h a b i t s , and But see p o o r Mother v a i n l y t r y , once more, wanted them changed. They were changed but the great s p o r t i n g To t e l l t h e busman t h a t she's o n l y f o u r .

I.C. p u b l i o d i d not l a y 10 t o 1 on F e l i x . Although i t t r i e d y e r y hard to maintain p o p u l a r i t y , i t s h a b i t of s c r a t c h i n g The f o u r t h , embedded d e e p i n p a i n t and p l a s t e r [those of whom i t d i d not approve met w i t h q u i t e a s a l e s r e s i s She l o o k s q u i t e o p p o s i t e f r o m an Old M a s t e r ; tance. However, a l l those t r o u b l e s are now over, and F e l i x , And f o r a s e c r e t purpose none can g l e a n becoming a l i t t l e too tinsponianeous, a l i t t l e too much l i k e She t e l l s her boy f r i e n d t h a t she's seventeen. d a i l y newspaper, ( t h e standard b r i o k s h u r l e d a t r e g u l a r i n t e r v a l s t o keep the cat jumping) i s now w e l l fed and cared The f i f t h age n e x t ; she s p o r t s a g o l d e n r i n g , f o r , e s t a b l i s h e d on the best oushion i n the Union.

B r a v e symbol o f her s k i l l i n b a r g a i n i n g .

S4 i t has grown from the wee t h i n g t h a t could h a r d l y r a i s e And though she i s not f a r advanced i n l i f e , a b i t of f l u f f from an IOTA jumper t o a cat t h a t w i l l l i f t i t s "Much o l d e r t h a n her t e e t h , " says B r o t h e r ' s w i f e . t a i l on anybody's doorstep. Let us hope t h a t l i k e i t s p r e nomer i t w i l l keep w a l k i n g - and w a l k i n g — and l i k e K i p l i n g ' s , The s i x t h soon f a l l s , and t i m e i s g e t t i n g l a t e , by i t s e l f , no s t r i n g s and no oat-towing t o the prophet t h a t But b i r t h d a y s stopped when she was t h i r t y e i g h t . i s s a i d t o be e x i s t i n g i n the E a s t . Keep w a l k i n g and the best of luck.

The s e v e n t h now, and Granny's l o o k i n g f i n e .

I hear i t rumoured that London has gone to great expense t o (You wouldn't t h i n k t h a t ehe was e i g h t y n i n e ) . stage a p r o c e s s i o n to c e l e b r a t e the occasion !

As I've not w r i t t e n w a f f l e f o r so long — although I t r i e d The s e v e n t h gone; how sad the sombre day land t r i e d nothing worthwhile has resulted-I'm very s o r r y . But When Granny, i n her n i n e t i e s , passed away. lyou have my c o n g r a t u l a t i o n s f o r the f i r s t h a l f century w e l l And X l d e a t Daughter (who i s g e t t i n g on) run and best wishes f o r the second h a l f .

T e l l s t h e r e p o r t e r , " d i e d , aged s i x t y one".

Greetings t o a l l those who s u f f e r e d me, there must be some Bray A.R. — K . P . E l r i d g e . The F i f t h E d i t o r .

AGES

OF

WOMAN

l e f t i

FELIX. VIEWPOINT

Felix

D O W N

W I T H

F E L I X ?

Dear S i r , Once again U.L U. have decided t o f o i s t t h e i r wretched newspaper upon us, and they time w i t h a l l the audaCOLLEGE * H E NEWSPAPER O F WPEmJtt, c i t y o f new born pups they calmly suggest t h a t " F e l i x " , together w i t h v a r i o u s other c o l l e g e newspapers should q u i e t l y ceaso p u b l i c a t i o n to make way f o r a "greater C i r c u l a t i o n : 1200. cause".

Just l i k e t h a t ; no fuss or bother, j u s t pack iditor:D.C.Kale. up and go, and g i v e dear o l d Uncle U.L.l*. some elbow room • T h i s i s FELIX no. 50. F i r s t s h o w i n f h i s t i n y How long w i l l i t take U.L.U. t o r e a l i z e t h a t s t u • w h i s k e r s o n D e c . 9 , 1 9 4 9 , he was a f a y w r i t e r i g h t dents don't want t o read the k i n d o f news t h a t U.L-C. 'rom t h e b e r i n n i n g , a n d 1 oday stand's a l o n e axrag would l i k e then t c read.

The " F e l i x " correspondent t h e j . i . p a p e r s a s one n o t r u n n i n g a t a l o s s . I n a s s e r t s t h a t we do not hear enough about Senate house; t h e p a s t t h r e e - o d d y e a r s he. r e c o r d e r ] many g l o r i o u s t h i s nay be t r u e , but i t does not need a U.L.U. newse v e n t s I n I.C., p l a y e d a l a r g e p a r t i n k e e p i n g t h e paper t o remedy t h i s s i t u a t i o n .

I c o n s i d e r t h a t any U n i o n i n f o r m e d o f i t s own a c t i v i t i e s , a n d managed U.L.U. newspaper would i n e v i t a b l y c o n t a i n paragraphs a t t h e same t i m e t o k e e p i t s r e a d e r s amused . F E L I X upon paragraphs about Union " p o l i c y " and Union "plans". i s g l a d t o have t h e C o r o n a t i o n c e l e b r a t i o n s c o i n How t h i s may be a l l f o r the good o f c u r s o u l s , but I c i d e w i t h h i s own, a n d w i s h e s e v e r y b o d y good c h e e r t h i n k t h a t most sttidents v c n l d r a t h e r have t h i s s o r t n e x t week. of news r e l e g a t e d t o a .small column i n a h i n d e r page.

I t i s u n f o r t u n a t e t h a t a shadow s h o u l d s t a r t To quote from the I.C.'.'. Handbook " F e l i x r e p o r t s C o l l e g e c r e e p i n p a t t h i s t i m e a c r o s s 1' ; L I Z . T h o u g h t h i s a c t i v i t i e s , . . end -oilier news o f i n t e r e s t t o students . s h a d o w - - i n t h " f o r m o f a U.L. n e w s p a p e r - - means F e l i x i s a l i g h t h e a r t e d animal., but he can be s e r i o u s ; v e i l , we earurot a v o i d t h e . f a c t t h a t a U.L. p a p e r , ho has no axe t o g r i n d save the i n t e r e s t s of the C o l l e g e , t o r u n s u c c e s s f u l l y , ::ust n e t h a v e c o m p e t i t i o n f . and i s p o l i t i c a l l y independent". from i n d i v i d u a l C o l l e g e papers. The l a t e s t deveF e l i x s e l l s w e l l i n I.C. because he i s a l i g h t h e a r lopments i n that d i r e c t i o n are reported elsewhere ted. a n i m a l , not because he p r i n t s columns about Senate i n - h i s i s s u e ; t h e F.X.'X r e p r e s e n t a t i v e a t t h a t House and Woburn Square.

I n other words, I b e l i e v e m e e t i n g ' "ave w h a t m i g h t h e t e r m e d p a s s i v e c o n s e n t t h a t even i f a l l c o l l e g e newspapers d i d c l o s e down t o to t h e d e c i s i o n s tahen, f o r FELIX I s unacquainte d make way f o r a U.L.U. paper, t h a t paper would never •with s u c h p r o b l e m s a s p r i n t i n g {we h a v e a n e n t i r e e n t i r e l y capture t h e i r c i r c u l a t i o n .

London U n i v e r s i t y l y d i f f e r e n t method o f p r o d u c t i o n ) a n d a d v e r t i s i n g i s too w i d e l y s c a t t e r e d f o r students t o d i s p l a y any more (we d o n ' t c o u r t o u t s i d e a d v e r t i s e r s ) w h i c h must h e than a minimum amount of i n t e r e s t i n the a c t i v i t i e s o f f i r s t thrashed out. students from other c o l l e g e s .

The f a t e o f F E L I X , t h e r e f o r e , h a n g s i n B a l a n c e .

However, t h i s does not mean t h a t F e l i x should not he hU'-'T h a v e o u r r e a d e r s ' - y o u r s , t h a t i s - v i e w s o n c o n t a i n any U n i v e r s i t y nevjs a t a l l } h a l f a page an i s s u e t h i s m a t t e r b e f o r e we s a n t a k e a n p a c t i o n one w a y o r a n o t h e r . The l i t ' l e r e s p o n s e we h a d t o o u r e n - could be devoted" t o V a r s i t y Hews, p r e f e r a b l y i n t h e form of a b r i e f summary.

A report contained i n a few l i n e s q u i r i e s i n t h e l a s t i s s u e was p r i m a r i l y a g a i n s t t h e i d e a o f a U.L. n e w s p a p e r , h u t we c a n n o t j u d f e would probably be appreciated more than i t s long-winded cousin.

P l e a s e don't l e t us have any more h i g h f a l u t i n t h e p u l s e o f I . C . f r o m h a l f - a - d o z e n o p i n i o n s . Do ideas about 'graciously g i v i n g way t o a g r e a t e r cause'; l e t u s know y o u r v i e w s b e f o r e J u n e 7 t h , s o t h a t we" l e t us be s e l f i s h f o r once and t h i n k about I.C. r a t h e r can s a y something d e f i n i t e a t the next meeting o f than U.L.U. t h i U.L . e d i t o r s .

Yours e t c .

D.A.D. We present t h e attempts o f some of our pas* E d i t o r s a t s h o r t - n o t i c e composition . Messrs Kughes(tfte foundere d i t o r ) and M i d g l e y are u n f o r t u n a t e l y unrepresented.

J

NEWS.

U. L._JO. The 2nd e d i t o r .

On t h i s famous o c c a s i o n our f i r s t r e a c t i o n i s t o f e e l much o l d e r and smile w i t h p r i d e at the achievement of our o f f s p r i n g .

But then we r e a l i z e t h a t f i f t y i s s u e s i s not much i n the l i f e o f a newspaper - time . w i l l be when she i s f i f t y years old.' I f F e l i x goes on as now, she w i l l indeed l i v e t o t h a t proud boast , l i k e h e r fabulous b r o t h e r Phoenix Consider - d i d 'Jells dream t h a t h i s p l a y t h i n g would o u t l i v e him?

I n t h e e a r l y days F e l i x l i v e d from day t o day. -We were short o f e v e r y t h i n g - money, news, a r t i c l e s , even readers.

But a f t e r o. modest s t a r t t h i n g s improved s l o w l y u n t i l i n i t s second year F e l i x found i t s feet w i t h an 8000 word, s i x page paper w i t h a c i r c u l a t i o n of over 1200, and thanks t o c a r e f u l s t r o k i n g F e l i x has purred i t s way through t h r e e and a h a l f y e a r s .

May i t continue to do so as i t grows.

As i t grows . . . f o r F e l i x must continue t o grow b o t h i n s i z e and s t a t u r e .

Growth i s almost a synonym f o r l i f e - for-«ewspapers as w e l l as organisms.

With-the p r o j e c t e d expansion of"the C o l l e g e , the next f i f t y i s s u e s w i l l cover a ' p e r i o d - r i c h i n o p p o r t u n i t i e s . We* c o n f i d e n t l y look forward t o a doubled c i r c u l a t i o n . , a l a r g e r F e l i x , perhaps even a l e t t e r p r e s s F e l i x ! But whatever happens we want F e l i x to remain i t s independent and i n s o n c i a n t self*.

C. Hargreaves, Eindhoven, 20:5:53 C l i f f . Hargreaves i s now E d i t o r of the Phi lip's (Eindhoven) " T e c h n i c a l Review". _____ "The F o u r t h and S i x t h E d i t o r . (3.II. jVy-rrie;)-'

the V>ir& guy from the l e f t s a i d j u s t breathe deeply and scon y c u l l be away and so I d i d and next he was sap-tag why didn't I n a r r y the g i r l which, one v;as ny counter to gat t i n e to t h i n k and then ny defence poured cup about then i n order the f i r s t was the best but I was too young and an yway she never brought i up second was a.', a t t c - j t to. react the f i r s t the t h i r d was a glaaour g i r l and knew i t so she played her cards and gave nothing away the f o u r t h didnt l a s t too n a i v e and t h e f i f t h I would ond. Z. asked but she i s a c a r e e r g i r l then I cane round and. i t was a l l coughing and s p i t t i n g my guas cut w i t h a h o r r i b l e headache and. u t t e r wretchedness only wanting t o dry up and: sleep J

Dear S i r , Could the P.efectory Committee p l e a s e p u b l i s h the i n g r e d i e n t s of t h e i r d e l i c i o u s S o l f e r i n o soup?

Yours g a s t r o n o m i c a l l y , An Anxious Stomach

C_A.,R f! I y A j .

The U. L. Union i s o r g a n i z i n g a Gala F e s t i v a l on the 25th June, t o be held i n the F e s t i v a l Gardens i n a i d of c h a r i t i e s .

Those who were present l a s t year w i l l need no f u r t h e r encouragement to p a r t i c i p a t e .

A , p r o c e s s i o n w i l l s t a r t from Hyde Park at about 2,45, and go by way o f Clapham Common ( t e a here) t o enter B a t t e r sen Gardens at about 6.30.

H i g h l i g h t s of t h e evening i n c l u d e an a l l - s t u d e n t Revue, demonstrations on the lawn by Bobby Locke, stunt s i n the b o a t i n g l a k e , a famous magician's performance, and crowning of the C a r n i v a l Queen. I t i s hoped t o leave the gardens at about 11 f o r a b o n f i r e and dancing f o r ft while.

F u r t h e r d e t a i l s w i l l bs posted i n the Union l a t e r on, and w i l l a l s o be p u b l i s h e d i n the U.L. Rag Magazine 'LULU'., H a n d b i l l s f o r d i s t r i b u t i o n amongst the p u b l i c w i l l a l s o be issuedU. L.

L IT E RA R Y

O C T E T Y'S

V E N T U R E

' The U.L. L i t e r a r y S o c i e t y , encouraged as a l s o a l i t t l e i r r i t a t e d by the success o f the Oxford and Cambridge ventures, have decided t o b r i n g out an annual anthology of L.U. p o e t r y .

I t w i l l be a 'digest' of a l l the poetry p r i n t e d i n the C o l l e g e Magazines i n the p r e ceding year.

The p r i c e i s t o be I s . or I s . Sd. and i t w i l l come out at the beginning of each s e s s i o n .

King's C o l l e g e won the U.L.U. debating championship and the motion i n proposing "An i n f a n t i s happier i n i t s infancy than an adult i n a d u l t e r y " .

Wye C o l l e g e , t h e i r opponents, o f f e r e d themselves as personal witnesses f o r the o p p o s i t i o n ; and gave most o f the Constantino arguments f o r King's t o oppose on i r r e l e vant moral grounds which King's had presumably r e t a i n e d from t h e i r i n h i b i t e d i n f a n c i e s .

The house passed the motion by 18 votes t o 13.

(The four a b s t a i n e r s confessed experience only of i n f a n c y ) .

-PERSONAL

ADVERTS.

WANTED: U L U C o r o n a t i o n B a l l t i c k e t . A n y p r i c e p a i d . A p p l y B.H.Wormsley v i a R a c k .

FOR S A L S : P o r t a b l e H.M.V. g r a m o p h o n e i n g o o d c o n d i t i o n . £5 o r n e a r o f f e r . A p p l y M . J . K v e n e t t v i a Union Rack.

WANTED : A w h i t e r o w i n g W i n d c h e a t e r - s i z e t o s u i t c o x p l u s m u c h . c l o t h i n g f - S.H.Wearne FOR S A L B : R e m i n g t o n H a n d f u l l - b a n k p o r t a b l e t y p e w r i t e r £20:- S.tt.Wearne, I . C . U n i o n .

FELIX F E L I X ROAD T E S T

WORLDS ' FASTEST

HODSON AMD TROT! IAN UP - but not v e r y f a r ' y e t .

Note the t h r o t t l e (qovered by the c o - d r i v e r ' s hand) and the i g n i t i o n l e v e r above the s t e e r i n g v.'heel.

THE START OF THE TEST - Day and A s p i n a l l Up, The Test O f f i c i a l s are on t h e l e f t , and t h e speedometer - J . E . T a y l o r , Esq. - t o t h e r i g h t .

HISTORY The present "Bo" i s the second of an i l l u s t r i o u s l i n e o f G u i l d s ' mascots.

The f i r s t was a Rover which appeared at the back of G u i l d s i n 1919.

I t was a regul a r entry i n t h e B r i g h t o n Run, u n t i l i n '33, t h e R.A.C. became more s t r i c t about dates.

The Rover was f i x e d at 1905, so he was out.

Nevertheless he took p a r t i n a number o f rags.

I n 1934 he was l e f t o u t s i d e 1C Downing S t r e e t c o n t a i n i n g en e f f i g y of Ramsey Kacdonald h o l d i n g an o u t s i z e b i s c u i t - t h i s b e i n g i n commemmora.ticn o f Lord Iiacfarlr.nd's g i f t of a new R o l l s Rovce t o the f i r s t La.bout P.M. The Rover f i n i s h e d h i s days chugging round t h e C r y s t a l Palace Race Track, announcing events during the intervals. '.Vher. the war came and the army took over the P a l a c e , Bo. I disappeared Bo. I I , A7/33, was bought, reputedly f o r £40, In -.Shropshire by the l a t e John Garland, who ran i t f o r a few years and then handed i t ove* t o F. J Pidgeon, who l a t e r stored i t at h i s home i n Rickmansworth u n t i l the end o f t h e war.

Bo had many Veteran Car Club rune, ana raced a t Brooklands, l a p p i n g the o l d "Mountain" •course at 29 n.p.h.

Bo was made by Messrs. James and Brown, Hammersmith, i n 1901.

Only one other car made by t h i s f i r m , •a 'C4 model, i s known to e x i s t .

Last year, at the end of the B r i g h t o n Run, the "Bo" team had the pleasure of meeting C o l o n e l Brown, the designer, who was h i g h l y d e l i g h t e d t o see h i s product o f 51 years ago s t i l l going well.

The days-between '01 and '34 are u n c e r t a i n , but, "Bo" was bought from a b l a c k s m i t h , near Much Venlock, Salop, being then a d i r t y grey and b l a c k .

He als o had s o l i d t y r e s , but these were replaced by special: old crock pneumatics i n '37.

T e c h n i c a l Data: Two h o r i z o n t a l c y l i n d e r s , t o t a l capacity = 2464 c c •Tremblercoil i g n i t i o n .

Cigarettes: Abdulla.

Tyres: f r o n t , 31 x 4 inches; r e a r , 20 x 3-J-Tyre pressure 50.

Consumption: p e t r o l , 12 m.p.g.; p l u g s , 1 p e r outing.

Capacity: 2$ buckets of water.

10 g a l l o n s p e t r o l Valve's: automatic i n l e t ; exhaust d r i v e n by camshaft.

S t e e r i n g : rack and p i n i o n .

Brakes: f o o t , disused owing t o gear box s t r a i n .

The handbrake operates by c o n t r a c t i n g on t o drums on the r e a r wheels, the brake l e v e r being pushed f o r ward .

Transmission: chain d r i v e ; no d i f f e r e n t i a l .

L i g h t i n g : side and t a i l by p a r a f f i n .

Front by acetylene.

L u b r i c a t i o n i s by d r i p feed t o c y l i n d e r s and main bearings.

C i r c u l a t i o n o f c o o l i n g water i s by a water pump, c h a i n d r i v e n from the camshaft.

There i s no dynamo, and a batten,' has t o be charged f o r each outing.

The t h r o t t l e i s hand c o n t r o l l e d , and i s on the "steering column, as i s the i g n i t i o n c o n t r o l . ' Thi s n e c e s s i t a t e s having a c o - d r i v e r i n ncdern t r a . f f i c c o n d i t i o n s , where the d r i v e r needs one hand at the wheel and the other at the brake.

The gear l e v e r i s outsid e the c a r , on the r i g h t of the d r i v e r .

F o r t h e c o n v e n i e n c e o f members who may w i s h t o V o t e we p r i n t t h e n o m i n a t i o n s h e e t o f t h e " B o y s " G l u t , T h e r e was a n o t h e r n o m i n a t i o n f o r C o m m i t t e e Member, b u t i t was n o t f u l l y s e c o n d e d .

NorttNftTioti Proposer

CHAMPION BOANERGES DRIVER COMPETITION EVENT 1.

LE UAKS START '

1.

A s p i n a l l and Day

19 sees.

2.

P i l k i n g t o n and Brown •

3.

Trottman and Hodson

IT 2.

21.6 sees.

45 sees.

CIRCUIT OF ROYAL ALBERT HALT,

1.

P i l k i n g t o n and Brown A s p i n r t l l and

41 sees.

Day

42 BSCS.

Trottraan and Hodson

47 sees •

.."•narks

Lne 0-5 n.p.h.

4.2 r e c c

2c*to-, gear

0-10

m.p.h

12 sees.

3c + c»i :•:>- 2.1-1 g"ar--

0 20

m.p.h

16 sees.

3rr'i, O'-i, 2nd and 2 r i gears

0-23

m.p-h

35 sees.

Bottom, 2nd. 3rd, top ge-rs

ake Tost

Distance

15-0 m.p.h.

12 feet

26-0

24 feet

m.p.h

4

Confirmed, by narks on P r i n c e Consoi't Road.

Turning c i r c l e , 35 f e e t .

Track, 4 feet Maximum speed ( P r i n c e Consort Road, two up) 23 m.p.h.

Maximu-i speed (Hyde Park, five'up ) ».-.

33 n.p.h.

(This has not been o f f i c i a l l y confirmed).

NOTE: A modern 2-J- l i t r e car a c c e l e r a t e s 0-30 i n 7 sees, and, w i t h ICO l b . foot p r e s s u r e , w i l l ! brake 30-0 i n 30 f e e t , consuming 20 m i l e s 1 g a l l o n .

Thus, w h i l e "Bo" i s a l i t t l e behind i n a c c e l e r a t i o n , he has r a t h e r b e t t e r brakes than the modern c a r .

-.; Readers are reminded that 3o has f u r t h e r outings t h i 3 term: 1.

To-day, when he attends the G u i l d s F i e l d Cup Race.

2.

Sports Day, next Thursday.

Old Crocks t o Windsor, 3.

Coronation R a l l y .

June 7th, from Hyde Park, 3.30 a.m.

NOTICE Tn r r d e r that events o c o u r r i n r l a t e -n the t e m should not pass unrecorded i t has beer, decided t o produce tho next FELIX t o appear on the 19th., not the 12th. o f June.

I t I s hoped t h a t the I . C . P r e s i d e n t i a l r e s u l t s w i l l then be a v a i l a b l e . They " . ' i l l be stamped on FJ-:!-:; a f t T p r i n t i n g .

T

D.RIovck

1 eoplo who ">ill not bo at College at t h a t time aro invited t o r i v e t h e i r names and adjreasos t o t h o e d i t o r v i a the >\ack, With 5d. t o cover postage eo3ts. .Mtcrnr.tf.volyj i f names d o n e r\re l e f t a copy w i l l be reserved and may be purchased. on H..",'

FELIX Theatre

* >

f*

"THE

A P P L E

T h e a t r e R o y a l , naymarket. ( G a l l e r y b o o k a b l e - 3/6).

Shaw s u b t i t l e d t h i s p l a y "A p o l i t i c a l e x t r a v a gansa".

I t s u f f e r s from t h a t ogre o f the t h e a t r e the I n d e f i n i t e c o n c l u s i o n .

But i t i s n o t , as man; o f h i s l a t e r p l a y s tend to be, m e r e l y a p l a t f o r m f o r i n c i s i v e comment on the ways o f the w o r l d .

The time i s the f u t u r e , and i n such a f u t u r e the r o y a l f a m i l y i s no l o n g e r c o n t e n t to c h r i s t e n t r a ditionally: nor i s i t a l o n e i n t h i s r e s p e c t f o r we have B a l b u s and Boanerges and L y s i s t r a t a amongsi a h o s t o f odd s o u n d i n g c h r i s t i a n names to add to the f a n t a s y .

One might have e x p e c t e d the r o y a l h o u s e h o l d tc have r u s h e d ahead i n t o a f u t u r i s t i c p a t t e r n - b u t nol The decor i s t r a d i t i o n a l l y o r n a m e n t a l , and t h e d r e s s , save f o r Boanerges' most amusing ' u n i form o f l a b o u r ' , p r a c t i c a l l y normal.

A great p i t y , s i n c e t h e r e i s scope f o r i m a g i n a t i v e design here.

The p a r t i c u l a r a p p l e c a r t w h i c h i s c o n s t a n t l y i n danger o f u p s e t i s the c o n s t i t u t i o n a l monarchy.

K i n g Magnus, p l a y e d by N o e l Coward s u p r l s i n g l y e f f e c t i v e l y c o n s i d e r i n g the p a r t i s by no means h i e u s u a l t y p e , i s b e s e t by a s q u a b b l i n g c a b i n e t o f humbugs, l e d by P r o t e u s , (Laurence N a i s m i t h ) , a b o o r i n g , s h o r t tempered l i t t l e man, who cannot s i t s t i l l f o r more than a few moments, and who keeps c o n t r o l , s u c h as i t i s , l a r g e l y by t h r e a t e n i n g t o resign.

A d m i t t e d l y he has a p r e t t y tough job - he has two women i n h i s c a b i n e t , as w e l l as the newcomer Boanerges, "behind whose n a i v e awkwardness l i e s a wealth of i n i t i a t i v e .

Magnus has a v e r y a c t i v e mind, b u t as k i n g he must keep h i s views l a r g e l y unexpressed.

He sees the p o l i t i c a l s e t a r e r u i n i n g h i s c o u n t r y (no wonder, f o r i n t h i s unhappy E n g l a n d o n l y seve n p e r c e n t o f t h e v o t e r s go b u t i n s t e a d o f g i v i n g him freedom t o the p o l l s ) : t o a c t , P r o t e u s demands t h a t he s i g n away the A p r e t t y problem, which v e s t i g e s o f h i s power.

Magnus s o l v e s i n a d r a m a t i c a l l y i r o n i c a l manner.

O r i n t h i a , the k i n g ' s m i s t r e s s , d e s e r v e s much more mention t h a t I can r e a s o n a b l y a l l o t .

M a r g a r e t L e i g h t o n p l a y s the p a r t to p e r f e c t i o n , and tier p r o v o c a t i v e g u i l e forms an i n t e r e s t i n g c o n t r a s t The b o u d o i r i t s e l f , l a v i i i to the m a t r o n l y queen. l y c u r t a i n e d and s u i t a b l y f u r n i s h e d i n grand s t y l e , forms the background to the i n t r i g u i n g t u s s l e between O r i n t h i a and Magnus - a s p e c t a c l e i n itself.

Over and over they r o l l , and one f e e l s t h a t t h e y must soon tumble i n t o the o r c h e s t r a .

But as u s u a l t h e r e i s a knock on the door, a r a p i d r e o r i e n t a t i o n to d i g n i t y , and c a l m ensues a f t e r a g l o r i o u s scamper.

We axe not f e a s t e d y e t however.

Shaw h a s one more m o r s e l to o f f e r i n the form o f the A m e r i c a n ' p r o p o s a l to r e u n i t e the U.S.A. t o the B r i t i s h Empire.

C e c i l T r o u n c e r c a r r i e s o f f the p a r t o f A m e r i c a n ambassador w i t h e n t h u s i a s t i c g e n i a l i t y , and g i v e s an amusing, c h a r i c a t u r e , a c c e n t i n c l u d e d , His supero f the c o n f i d e n t , s o u l e s s American. f i c i a l l y e m o t i o n a l 'I was b o r n i n the shadow o f E l y C a t h e d r a l ' l e f t me c h i l l e d .

S i n g u l a r l y enough, Shaw does manage to i n s e r t i n t o t h i s f a n t a s y a comment on s c i e n c e , f o r Magnus laments: "The s c i e n t i s t s w i l l have n o t h i n g to do w i t h us, f o r the atmosphere o f p o l i t i c s i s n o t the atmosphere o f s c i e n c e . " But need i t f o l l o w t h a t w h i l e a community advances • b r i l l i a n t l y i n m a t t e r s s c i e n t i f i c , i t t e n d s to s t a n d s t i l l as f a r as s o c i a l and p o l i t i c a l organ i s a t i o n a r e concerned?"

R.B. •

;

|THE

GUILDS'

T H E

C A R T .

ENGINEER

The fourth number o f t h e annual Guilds' Engineer i 3 • now on sale (2s. 6d. t o students; 5s- others), and i s I t i s w r i t t e n i n such a manner t h a t well worth buying. practically everything can be easily understood by^a nonspeoialist, the only exception being on a r t i c l e on" polynomial solving using an electrolytic trough - and. t h i s oould not easily have been simplified. A short, fascinating account of speech research and sn article on the new wind tunnel are among the other features.

As an account of work being done in Guilds', this magazine i s far more illuminating than any prospectus could pdssibly be.

Congratulations t o a l l concerned.

(Review by a non-Guildsraan) PHOT 0 G R A F H Y The annual I.C.P.S. Exhibition was held a f o r t n i g h t .ago. - .Vhile t h e standard o f most of the work submitted was inexceptional, your reporter wa3 greatly impressed by some e x h i b i t s by a Past President, Col. B u l l .

These were very l i k e lithographs, but w i t h an elusive texture which suggested the s o r t of t h i n g that Seurat might have dene i n monochrome. A view of the South Bank Festival Site was particularly impressive.

One had the feeling I n conthat here the oamera was contributing to art. trast th» deserts of mountains, side streets and heads which formed the greater parti of the exhibition were uninspired.

L O S T

SOULS.

J.S. was q u i t e a o h a r a e t e r .

He was a l s o q u i t e an e y e f u l l .

He was t a l l i e h , s i l a v i s h , and had a t t r a o t i v e h a i r , f a s e i n a t i n g e y e s , and a good share o f s e x a p p e a l (which, o f eourae, i s j u s t as important i n males as f e m a l e s i ) He a l s o had a c o n s i d e r a b l e P e r s o n a l i t y Q u o t i e n t , whleh soon made i t s e l f e v i d e n t , and he was on some eoramittee o r other e a r l y i n h i s f i r s t y e a r a t I.C., and he was p o p u l a r on t h e s p o r t s f i e l d .

He wasn't muoh o f a one f o r t h e a r t s , but he d i d w r i t e a few l e t t e r s t o - t h e - e d i t o r when he was p a r t i c u l a r l y r o u s e d , and; In he was a good d e b a t e r and c o n v e r s a t i o n a l i s t . g e n e r a l , t h e n , he was l o o k e d up to as an acknowledged l e a d e r i n s e v e r a l o i r o l e s . and was q u i t e an a s s e t t o the C o l l e g e .

1

Because J . S . was a s k e d not t o Why "was'*? resume h i s eourse t h i s s e s s i o n - he was chucked o u t .

I don't t h i n k he s h i r k e d h i s work, a l t h o u g h he d i d n ' t seem t o be a l l out f o r a " f i r s t * ' , and h i s P r a c t i c a l was not above t h e a v e r a g e .

He was one Why of t h o s e who j u s t c o u l d n ' t make t h e g r a d e . l i d I c a l l him "T.S."?

Beoause he might be anybody, so he became J o h n S m i t h .

He i s t y p i c a l because about a q u a r t e r o f t h e f i r s t y e a r e n t r a n t s t o I.C. a r e thrown out eaoh y e a r , and i t i s not Some o f t h e b e s t a l l t h e N o n d e s c r i p t s we l o s e . round C o l l e g e men haven't q u i t e t h e b r i l l i a n c e r e q u i r e d a t I.C., and they have t o l e a v e , t o e n r i c h u s u a l l y a p o l y t e c h n i c , o r Her M a j e s t y ' s F o r c e s , with t h e i r sparkle.

F o r some r e a s o n , nobody e v e r s a y s muoh about the "ohuoked out bods".

F e l i x has n e v e r mentioned them, save i n a p a s s i n g r e f e r e n e e i n t h e f i r s t F e l i x of the session.

But i t i s a most important problem when a C o l l e g e l o s e s some o f t h e most p r o m i s i n g p e o p l e i t ever gets.

I f e a r i t emphasises t h e f a o t t h a t I.C. i s f a r more o f a t e c h n o l o g i e s ! s c h o o l t h a n a U n i v e r s i t y C o l l e g e , and has no time f o r t h o s e who don't show p r o m i s e o f b e i n g top grade technologists.

The s t a f f a r e o n l y t o o g l a d t o l o s e , and r a p i d l y f o r g e t , t h e s o i e n t i f i e a l l y seoond rate.

A r e a l U n i v e r s i t y i s a p l a c e where one's p r i m a r y o b j e o t i s t o d e v e l o p one's p e r s o n a l i t y and i n t e l l e c t t o t h e f u l l , i n a background w h i c h may be s c i e n t i f i c o r a r t i s t i c a c c o r d i n g t o one's temperament.

O x f o r d and Cambridge a r e l i k e t h a t , but London n e v e r has been.

A l l t h i s r a i s e s a l o t of red h e r r i n g s .

We a l l know t h a t London can't be a U n i v e r s i t y , and t h e y both t h a t I.C. can't be a U n i v e r s i t y C o l l e g e ; have t o o i m p o r t a n t U t i l i t a r i a n f u n o t l o n s i n s o o i e t y .

We a l s o know t h a t I.C. has t o chuck out men t o l e a v e room f o r t,he cream t o work p r o p e r l y , but none o f t h i s a l t e r s t h e f a o t t h a t t h e C o l l e g e i s a e s t h e t i c a l l y and humanly t h e p o o r e r f o r t h e i r d e p a r t u r e , which i s a v e r y sad t h i n g .

I t i s however one ox ouose sad t h i n g s t h a t Without b e i n g i r r e v e r e n t , i t i s can't be h e l p e d . l i k e someone d y i n g - i t can't be h e l p e d , but i t i s a l o s s t o S o o i e t y , w i t h the e x c e p t i o n t h a t i n t h a t case S o o i e t y r e c o g n i s e s i t s l o s s , and a t t a c h e s due seriousness to i t .

I.C. never appears t o r e g r e t i t s l o s s e s due t o c h u c k i n g - o u t , which apathy I've spent a column d e p l o r i n g .

I've n o t h i n g t o suggest t h a t s h o u l d be done about them, but anyt h i n g would be b e t t e r t h a n p r e t e n d i n g t h a t t h e s e people have never been.

W e l l , I've done my b i t ; the o n l y c o n s o l a t i o n I oan see i s t h a t the poor b l i g h t e r s are p r o b a b l y h a p p i e r o u t s i d e t h i s institution.

EDDIE

W A N T E D TO Sports

BE

IMMEDIATELY.

TRAINED

Editor.

News E d i t o r .

FOR

NEXT

Production

YEAR. Manager.

C i r c u l a t i o n Manager.

Salesmen.

Artists.

Production

Workers.

Apply through Rack.

Today ( F r i d a y ) i s Guild's Field. Cup Day, on annual competition between .the depart"T-rt s of G u i l d s . S t a r t i n g • a f t e r the Union meeting at l.meh i m e . The l a s t two even t s have been « race w i t h home-" Skylons t o B n t t e r s e a , and a t r o l l e y - a n d - b o a t race between " v i l d s and the Serp e n t i n e . Always a good show. Report i n next FELIX. +

FELIX

ROWING

CRICKET

THREE

MORE

ROWING WINS

I.C.

A Coxed Four and t h e f o u r t h E i g h t represented I.C. at -fche Thames D i t t o n Regatta (a j u n i o r occasion) on May 1 6 t h , and t h e Four - i n a boat never beaten - won t h e i r evejt.

The E i g h t was not so h o t , but improved a great d e a l f o r the U.L. Regatta the week a f t e r .

A t t h e U.L. Boat Club's A l l o m Cup Regatta on May 23rd. «he f o u r t h E i g h t won the C l i n k e r D i v i s i o n and t h e C l i n k e r Four repeated t h e i r success at t h e D i t t o n s .

W i t h t h e f i r s t E i g h t not entered t h i s y e a r , t h e seoond took on t h e job of doing b a t t l e i n the Best Boat D i v i sion' on b e h a l f o f t h e C o l l e g e , and though they were Sot countin g on doing more t h a n g i v e U.C.H. I more than a good row f o r t h e i r money, they were i n f a c t shaky when b e a t i n g QJI.C. I i n t h e i r heat and l o s t t o a very f i n e e f f o r t by L.S.E. I i n t h e s e m i - f i n a l .

Even L.S.E. were staggered by t h e i r e x c e l l e n t row, but were not able t o produce the speed r e q u i r e d i n t h e f i n a l and U.C.H. r e t a i n ed t h e cup f o r the second t i m e .

Thames D i t t o n and A l l o m Cup Regattas:

C l i n k e r Four's

M.DiC. Campbell (bow), C. J . Lock, S.V. L i n c o l n , M.R. Hoare ( s t r o k e ) , D. M a r s h a l l ( c o x ) .

vs. Trinity

hull,

C&K.LrMge.

D e s p l t o t h e u i . U . n t i a n f : o" .'-'ofit's'.'- an', " o l m a n , I.C managed t o l e a v e t h e U n i o n a t a'r.out 10 o ' c l o c k i n a f l e e t o f e a r n , a n d a r . i v e d a t C a m h r i d ge w i - h c i t i n c i d e n t . I . C . seomed t o f i n d t h e c h a n g e o f p l a y i n g on.a p i c t u r e s q u e g r o u n d . a r r e m o v e d f r o - ":.leaJc a n d w i n c S swept H a r l i n g l o n v e r y s t i n u l a - i n g , and -ut up t h e i r b e s t d i s p l a y o f t h e s e a s o n . G o o d , strand b a t t i n g by K i t c h e n ( 2 9 ) a n d Ham:.-.erton(50) g a v e I . C . a n e x c e l l e n t s t a r t o n a p e r f e c t w i c h e t , and t h e r e f o l l o w e d some b r i s k s c o r i n g b y W i l s o n (24 n o t o u t ) a n d K i t c h e n e r (37 n o t o u t ) , who p - t on 50 i n - w e n t y n l n u t e s , t h u s e n a b l i n g I . C . t o d e c l a r e a t 1 8 1 f o r 6.

R e y n o l d s and W i l s o n cowled v i g c u r o u s l y , but o b t a i n e d no h e l p f r o m t h e p i t c h and T r i n i t y H a l l s c o r e d 141 for 4. A u l t t o o k 2 f o r 4 6 , and t h e w h o l e t e a m f i e l d e d 'very s o u n d l y .

Other resu.lts: I . C . 134-9 d e c . ( K i t c h e n 4 3 ) , Wembley 1 3 5 - 5 (Reynolds 3 f o r 37).

I . C . 102 ( I - o s t l e w a i t e 3 1 , W i l s o n 29); Q.M.C. 104-6 ( R e y n o l d s 3 f o r 44. K The s e c o n d XI h a v e s c o r e d t h r e e more v i c t o r i e s s i n c e o u r l a s t r e p o r t , a n d t h e S u n d a y XT a r e still unbeaten; R.T.Severn i n p a r t i c u l a r bat ing w i t h remarkable c o n s i s t e n c y .

ENGLAND R E T A I N THE A S H E S , i i n g l a n d b e a t t h e E m p i r e b y two w i c k e t s a t H a r l i n g t o n o n E m p i r e Day, f o r t h e t h i r d s u o o e s s i v e y e a r . V/e h o p e t o p u b l i s h a r e p o r t i n o u r n e x t i s s u e J

A l l o m Cup Regatta:

Clinker Eights

D. W i l l e t (bow), J . R i d l e y , H. E v a i s , A.M. Smith, J . T a y l o r , M. Alexander, M. C l a r k e , C. B e n t l e y ( s t r o k e ) .

J. Stoton (cox).

A l s o at U.L. was a Rum-Turn s c u l l i n g event w i t h but two e n t r i e s , L.S.E. b e a t i n g N.E.C, I t was a p i t y t h a t some o f t h e I.C. j u n i o r s c u l l i n g not rowing t h a t day were not e n t i i a d : a win should have been t h e i r s .

cam

mm

SOCIAL. TUESDAY, J U K E 2 n d . C o r o n a t i o n D a y . The I . C . C o r o n a t i o n B a l l w i l l be f r o m 10.p.:.. t i l l 4.0 a.m.

T i c k e t s h a v e a l l b e e n s o l d . On t h e same n i g h t t h e r e i s a l s o a U.L.U. C o r o n a t i o n B a l l - f o r d e t a i l s s e e t h e n o t i c e b o a r d i n I . C . U . On t h e T h u r s d a y ( 4 t h ) some m i n o r u n i v e r s i t i e s a r e h o l d i n g a C o r o n a t i o n B a l l a t the Royal F e s t i v a l H a l l from t i l l 5.0 a.m. T i c k e t s f o r t h i s , p r i c e 11.0 p.m. t h r e e g u i n e a s d o u b l e , may be o b t a i n e d f r o m t h e I . T.C. S e c r e t a r y , 5 3 , P l i m l i c o R d . , S.V.'.l.

THURSDAY, J u n e 4 t h , S p o r t s D a y . B e s i d e s t h e u s u a l S p o r t s a t H a r l i n g t o n t h e r e - w i l l be an I . C . S p o r t s Day P a r t y i n I . C . U . i n c l u d i n g d a n c i n g f r o m 8.0 I I . 30 p.m. D e t a i l s a p p e a r i n I . C . U .

ANNUAL GENERAL M E E T I N G S . T h e s e a r e now b e i n g h e l d i n f a n t a s t i c n u m b e r s , among t h o s e s c h e d u l e d f o r t h e n e x t f o r t n i g h t a r e t h e f o l l o w i n g :F R I D A Y , 2 9 t h May; I . C . P h o t o g r a p h i c S o c , C t t e .

Rm A . 1 . 1 5 . , R.C.S. R i f l e C l u b , C t t e . Rm. B., 1 . 1 5 . , I . C . Mus. S o c . ( n o p l a c e a n n o u n c e d ) , 1 . 1 5 .

R.C.S B o a t C l u b (no p l a c e o r t i m e announced i n I .C .U) .

MONDAY, J U H E l s t . I . C . L i t .

Deb. S o c , C t t e . Rm. A , 1 . 3 0 . , I . C . M o u n t a i n e e r i n g C l u b , C t t e . Rm. B., 1.15.

Monday, June 8 t h . I.C. I c e S k a t i n g C l u b , C t t e .

A, Rm. A, 1 . 2 5 . , I . C . G o l f i n g A s s o c n . , C t t e . Rm. 5.15.

THURSDAY, JUNE 11TH. I . C . U n i o n G e n e r a l M e e t i n g , G y m n a s i u m , 1.15 ( ? • ) . E l e c t i o n o f E n t e r t a i n m e n t s Committee and I.C.U. C o u n c i l R e p r e s e n t a t i v e s .

All t h e A.G.M.s l i s t e d a b o v e i n v o l v e t h e e l e c t i o n of C l u b O f f i c e r s f o r t h e S e s s i o n 1 9 5 3 - 54.

F E L I X r e g r e t s ' 'that no o t h e r d e t a i l s a r e a v a i l a b l e for t h i s p e r i o d ( except p o s s i b l y , exams!).

YOU

ARE

GOLF S i x t e e n members p l a y e d i n the S p r i n g M e e t i n g a t CAMBERLEY HEATH G o l f Club on A p r i l 27th.

The P r e s i d e n t ' s P r i z e was won by R.H. HEENAN w i t h a g r o s s 77, the runner-up b e i n g K.W. GLOVER (79).

The Foursomes STABLEFORD were won by W.T. ROACH & K.W. GLOVER w i t h a t o t a l o f 32 p o i n t s .

M.T. FRIEDL won the h a n d i c a p p r i z e f o r morni n g 18 and a l l day 36 h o l e s at Denham when p l a y i n g i n t h e i r Open C h a l l e n g e Bowl M e e t i n g .

He was an u n l u c k y l o s e r a t the 19th i n t h e VICTORY CHALLENGE CUP m e e t i n g h e l d at N.FORELAND o v e r the E a s t e r Week-end.

At t h e i r m e e t i n g K.W. G l o v e r , who did not q u a l i f y f o r the m a t c h - p l a y s t a g e s , won second' p r i z e i n a Foursome C o m p e t i t i o n ; W.A. Gardner was knocked out i n the 1st round o f the matches; H.N.A. ASHFORTH shot the q u a l i f y i n g s c o r e but f a i l e d to q u a l i f y on h i s l a s t n i n e h o l e s t o t a l .

I.C.G.A. b e a t K i n g ' s C o l l e g e H o s p i t a l at Highgat e on Wed. 29th. A p r i l .

Lament upon the C u l t u r a l P a r a l y s i s induced by Examinations Not a s i n g l e p i e c e of gen F a l l s from my once f e r t i l e pen.

Can the Muse be i d l e then?

Ho, j u s t working.

Can the rhymster f i n d a rhyme When he hasnt any time Even f o r a g i n and orange?

Not damned l i k e l y .

Though a poet's l i c e n c e covers Lots of s i n s i n ardent l o v e r s I t can never hope t o shove us Through a B.Sc. Watt A Wordsworth

S P O R T S

THE

COLLEGE!

TO KEMPSONSAT ONCE? 44,Queen's

Gate Mews.

TEA

4TH.

EXHIBITION.

INTER-COLLEGE OBSTACLE

GO

H A R L I N G T O N

J U N E

A DISGRACE GLIDING

TO

DAY

C O A C H 2/6

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TUG-OF-WAR.

R A C E (Anyone can 1/6

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2/6

(10.30, IO.SO, 1.30

Published by the FELIX Board". Imperial College Union. London. S. W. 7, Printed by S'U Vous Plait Ltd.. 2, Exhibition Rd., S. W. 7.

f r o m the Union)