http://felixonline.co.uk/archive/IC_1960/1960_0148_A

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Dominant among the entries were eleven Model "T" Fords, and a 1922 de Dion roadsweeper. This fine veh-iole was complete with de Dion rear axle and with a l l attachments i n werk-ing order.

FUST PRIZE FOR JEZEBEL Daring the vacation the R.C.S. Motor Club took Jezebel, the f i r e engine nasoot of the Royal College of Science Union, down to Basildon near Southend, to compete i n a r a l l y organised by the Historic and Com-meroial Vehioles Club. Setting e f f early i n the morning of Sunday 11th. September i n bright sunshine we soon ran into heavy t r a f f - i c and were delayed i n several jams. As a result Of this we arrived late i n Basildon and missed the start of the parade. However, by judicious use of the accelerator we managed to catch up along the route. appropriately enougl the parade ended up at a oenaercial vehicle repair station where the oom-peting vehicles were l i n e d up f a r the Conoours d'

The Conoours d' Elegance was f o l -lowed by a driving test. In this the President of the R.C.S. Motor Club, J i n King, incurred the least number of penalty points and consequently won f i r s t prize. One of the photographs en this page shows Jim reoeiving the prize from the president of the H.C.V.C. The other photograph, for the benefit of those new to the College, i s an older picture of "Jez." in Prince Consort Kd. After securing the prize money we made a hasty getaway. On the return journey we stepped only twice, f i r s t l y to quench our own t h i r s t s at a pub, and secondly to quench Jez's when she ran out Âťf petrol.

S A I L I N G

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There a r e , i n t h i s c o l l e g e , a l a r g e riSirab e r of i n o f f e n s i v e people who a r e v a r i o u s l y called y a c h t s m e n , s a i l i n g - t y p e s , e t c . . They may l o o k i n o f f e n s i v e , b u t I oan assure you that when they get a f l o a t , o r whatever the t e c h n i c a l t e r m i s , t h e y are d e v i l s i n carnate. Once,and o n l y once,have I ever been s a i l i n g , a n d i t was the most i n c r e d i b l e a f f a i r . The gentleman s t a r t e d by t e l l i n g me a l l about h a l i a r d s , r u d d e r s , s h e e t s and a l o t of o t h e r s t u f f t h a t I d i d n ' t understand. We s e t o f f . "Steadyl"he cried,"We're going aboutJ""Aboutt?" I said."About what?"And then i t happened, t i l t h a sudden swing the b o a t attempted t o t u r n a r i g h t angle,the t h i n g t h a t hangs from the mast h i t me,and I was h u r l e d i n t o the water. I clambered b a c k , I t was some time before he stopped laughing.Of course we r e p e a t e d t h i s p r o c e s s a l i t t l e time l a t e r . That was i t as f a r as I was concerned. L a s t week,a s a i l i n g c l u b man asked me to go s a i l i n g w i t h him. I d e c l i n e d the o f f e r . Wouldn't you?


FELIX

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F R O M

MEETING

The Union's s o c i a l olubs can be roughly divided i n t o three groupsi n a t - i o n a l c l u b s , r e l i g i o u s c l u b s , and p o l - i f c i c a l olubs. In the former categor y arm* the Arab, Chinese, I n d i a n , P a k i s t a n , e?.,i P c V i s h S o c i e t i e s . The g e n e r a l aims of th*i»3 «>oieties seem t o be the s t r e n g -thea.-;<% o f morale among t h e i r own members, who a r e ' o s s e t i a l l y r e s i d e n t i n a s t r a n g e country and t o a c t as ambassadors t o the r e s t o f the C o l l e g e . The J e w i s h S o c i e t y seems t o f a l l mid-way i n c l a s s i f i c a t i o n between the n a t - i o n a l c l u b s and the r e l i g i o u s o l u b s . There are two e v a n g e l i c a l C h r i s t i a n soo- i e t i e s , the Student C h r i s t i a n Movement (S.C.M.) and C h r i s t i a n Union (C.U.) The C.U, r e q u i r e s i t s members t o aco~ept t e n p o i n t s of d o c t r i n e , whereas the S.C.M. w i l l accept members o f any C h r i s t i a n denomination. To c a t e r f o r s p e c i f i c a l l y denominational i n t e r e s t s t h e r e a r e the C a t h o l i c , Church),Anglicm./ There i s a l s o and M e t h o d i s t S o c i e t i e s . the nawly formed I s l a m i o S o c i e t y . Humanists a r e r e p r e s e n t e d by the Huxley Society. The p o l i t i c a l s o c i e t i e s have r e p r e s e n t - a t i v e s o f the f o u r main p a r t i e s i n the Conservative S o o i e t y j s t h e S o c i a l i s t S o c i e t y , t h e L i b e r a l S o c i e t y , and the M a r x i s t Forum. I n a d d i t i o n there i s the I n t e r n a t i o n a l R e l a t i o n s Club (I.C.R.) which a c t s p a r t l y i n the r o l e o f h o s t s to overseas s t u d e n t s and p a r t l y as a forum f o r the d i s c u s s i o n o f i n t e r n a t i o n a l politics. L a s t l y t h e r e i s the Campaign f o r N u c l e a r Disarmament (C.N.D.) The a c t i v i t i e s o f these s o c i e t i e s are c o n t r o l l e d , c o - o r d i n a t e d , and p r o -moted by the S o c i a l Clubs Committee (S.C.C".) on which a r e p r e s e n t a t i v e o f each s o c i e t y has a p l a c e . The S.C.C. administers grants to the s o c i e t i e s , disbands the moribund s e e i e t i e a and approves the f o r m a t i o n of new ones.

The R e c r e a t i o n a l Clubs Committee has been formed i n order to- ease the admin- i s t r a t i v e burden o f the S.C.C. Last y e a r the S.C.C. n f o r t y clubs., These olubs have now been d i v i d e d i n t o two r o u g h l y equal committees. r 8

The f i r s t meeting, o f the R.C.C. w i l l be convened i f f t h e near f u t u r e and the o f f i c e r s f o r the y e a r w i l l be e l e c t e d . The R.C.C. i s now r ~ - r n s J T i j»..f ia_. a l * o o - o r d i n a t i o n and f i n a n c e o f thef f o l l o w — -ing o l u b s : T

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N E W S Doc P r i t c h a r d , l a t e of t h i s oolumn,is now b l o w i n g r e a l l y way out i n Canada. His Prof.wears a g r o t t y o l d T - s h i r t , a n d p l a y s tenor.Sounds l i k e an a b s o l u t e g a s . On the l o c a l scene,Miles D a v i s has been g i g g i n g around town. Reports I have r e c e i v e d . s t a t e t h a t Chambers and S t i t t were a g a s , i n f a c t r e a l l y way-out,but the r e s t of the f e l l e r 3 spent most of t h e i r time "blowing o f f - s t a g e . N o t having seen the show,I must r e l y on the m o n o s y l l a b i c v o c a l d e l i v e r y o f the Hammersmith Gaumont ice-cream vendors. They were d i s appointed. The I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e j a z z scene l o o k s a l l s e t f o r a b l i s t e r i n g y e a r . Notable new venture s are the new hard-bop group, a funky p i a n o - l e s 3 q u a r t e t , a n o u t f i t , f e a t u r i n g two trombones,and a seventyf i v e p i e c e rock band. J a z z c l u b c h i e f Mike S a i t h ' . i s expected to blow hardd r i v i n g s k i n s , w i t h the odd s k u l l and Chinese b l o c k thrown i n . Nut-boy baS3 p l a y e r , J o h n F a r n s w o r t h , w i l l be bendi n g t h a t b i g - t o n e d f i d d l e . I am t o l d he was l a s t 3een heading south from Glencoe,on the road w i t h bass,trombone and f i v e c r a t e s of Scotch, L i k e Nut-boy i s I t i n e r a n t ! He c a r r i e s h i s Chinese d i c t i o n a r y w i t h himaSt a l l time3.

Since the end of l a s t s e s s i o n , t h e J a z z c l u b yak-harness has d i s a p p e a r e d . T h i s i s going t o make t h i n g s d i f f i c u l t f o r the J a z z c l u b yaks. I am hoping t o i n t r o d u o e s t a n d a r d i s e d j a z z u n i f o r m f o r a l l the f e l l e r a t h i s year. Green shades,beat' w h i t e duck trousers,smock and rope s a n d a l s . L i k e , d i g those swing threads Dad.I,am a l s o c o m p i l i n g a beat d i c t i o n a r y , packed w i t h swinging phrases s t r a i g h t from i n f i n i t y . A must f o r anyone hopi n g t o make the scene. We e n d , t h i s week,on a p o l i t i c a l n o t e ; I mean,Khruschev's a sweetie,but l e t ' s f a c e i t , h e j u s t doesn't swing. RIMSHOT. T

As a reminder t o members, the next S.C.C. n e e t i n g ' i s a$ 5.45 p.m. on October 1 7 t h . i n Conmittee Room "A".

O U R

B i l l i a r d s & Snooker G l i d i n g Club Ice S t o t i n g Club Mountaineerin g Clnb R i d i n g Club Rover Crew B r i d g e A Chess Club S k i Club Underwater Club T.H.A. Group

Railway S o c i e t y Wine T a s t i n g Soc. Danoing Club E x p l o r a t i o n Sec. Film Society J a z z Club Debating S o c i e t y Musical Society Photographic Soc. Dramatic S o c i e t y

The committee i s farmed from t h e s e n i o r student members of each s o c i e t y . E C H N r C A L

. ov; t h a t the P r e s i d e n t and S e c r e t a r y of the Union are b o t h Roman C a t h o l i c s , the time may have come to c o n s i d e r the s u g g e s t i o n of one Union member t h a t the bar be c l o s e d d u r i n g Lent. We a l s o hear t h a t the Union o f f i c e i s t o be used f o r lunch hour c o n f e s s i o n s . Charges w i l l be modest,and a pay-as-you-confess scheme i 3 to be i n t r o d u c e d . Overheard*on the ICWA c o r r i d o r ; " I don't' t h i n k I s h a l l have to get m a r r i e d . "

We hear t h a t Bob F i n c h ' s s i s t e r i s bes m i r c h i n g the f a m i l y name by j o i n i n g the C.U. Perhaps the c o l l e g e ' s l e a d i n g i n f i d e l w i l l soon renounce S c r u t i n y and s t a r t wearing h o l e s i n h i s t r o u s e r knees i n the Union o f f i c e . Suggestion to end the e t e r n a l r e f e c t ory queue;Ban undergraduates from the Union.

He are p l e a s e d to note t h a t the 1 l a t e s t i s s u e of Phoenix i s the b e s t f o r some time. The l a y - o u t was e s p e c i a l l y good. The Phoenix board a r e d i s a p p o i n t e d w i t h the s a l e s , h o w e v e r . l / 6 d i s n ' t v e r y much to p a y , r e a l l y . Shame on you a l l ! S i g h t f o r sore eyes 6n the " C h r i s t i a n Union p r i n t i n g machine;a n o t i c e which s says" Pray b e f o r e you Print'! We now presume t h a t our e d i t o r w i l l dash out and _ buy some second-hand c a s s o c k s , w h i l s t the s t a f f b u s i l y c l e a n out the F e l i x c o l l ection plate. C o n g r a t u l a t i o n - -o Jtooney On the openi n g of the B u t t e r y i n Queensgate,for eve n i n g meala f o r postgraduates and members of s t a f f . The q u a l i t y of the f o o d here i s v e r y good.One improvement t o a l l the r e f e c t o r i e s which would c o s t v e r y l i t t l e i n terms o f time and money,is the p r o v i s i o n of paper t a b l e n a p k i n s .

We have heard t h a t the t a k i n g s i n the Bar d u r i n g the l a s t 3 e s s i o n showed a r e c ord p r o f i t . The p r o f i t made i n the b a r h a s , f o r some y e a r s h e l p e d t o reduce the l o s s madein the r e f e c t o r y , b u t l a s t year, the r e f e c t o r y a l s o made a p r o f i t . S u r e l y i t i s not Union p o l i c y to r u n the b a r a t a p r o f i t , a t the expense o f s t u d e n t ' s hardearned g r a n t s . Then why doesn't the r e f e c t o r y committee reduce the p r i c e of beer? I t i s t o be hoped t h a t i n the immediate f u t u r e the a n t i q u a t e d magic-box i n the r e a d i n g room w i l l be r e p l a c e d by a more r e l i a b l e model. The p r e s e n t one s u f f e r s from severe f a t i g u e . Strange b u z z i n g sounds a r e c o n t i n u a l l y heard and mysteri o u s w h i t e l i n e s o c c a s i o n a l l y whizz a c r oss the s c r e e n . The Union can c e r t a i n l y a f f o r d the e x t r a 1+3 per week(out of b a r p r o f i t s ? ) f o r a new super-de-luxe model. T h i s would c e r t a i n l y s a t i s f y the most i l l u s t r i o u s and overworked gentleman a t I.C. Indeed,an i n s p i r e d P r e s i d e n t c o u l d go f u r t h e r and arrange f o r a g i g a n t i c . s c r e e n t o be f i t t e d i n t o the w a l l , a s a t ULU. The s i g h t of b e a u t i o u s ICWArians a c t i n g as u s h e r e t t e s and s e l l i n g popc o r n and ice-cream would soon make the r e a d i n g room the most p o p u l a r i n the Union. W i t h the s t a r t of a new s e s s i o n , r e f e c t o r y queues have once a g a i n become q u i t e i n t o l e r a b l e . The t r o u b l e i s t h a t n o t h i n g can be done about them. The k i t c h e n , i n fact,seems t o have been d e s i g n e d i n o r d e r to d e f y a l l attempts t o improve i t . With r e f e c t o r i e s on t h r e e f l o o r s to be s u p p l i e d f r o m one s m a l l k i t c h e n , t h e ( S t a n d a r d of meals i s i n e v i t a b l y low. ' '.'


T H E

S T A T U S

I t w i l l be obvious to more o t h e r d i r e o t e d among my r e a d e r s , that not a l l the f u t u r e leaders of i n d u s t r y who oome to I.C., achieve the (status* o f , say, P r e s i d e n t of the Union. It is d e s i r a b l e t h a t F r e s h e r s s h o u l d appr e c i a t e t h i s sad f a o t ab i n i t i o and, i n a t t e m p t i n g to beoome o r i e n t a t e d lUnienwiae, s&Oa±6. aeespdinga^ised-l f y ambatlon to. match a b i l i t y . Remesoer.in t h e Union o r g a n i s a t i o n there i s a niche f o r everyonel The task, then, whioh f a c e s each and a l l of us, and some more than o t h e r s , i s to c o n s i d e r o b j e c t i v e l y i n what way, however "humbly, we oan b e s t f i t i n t o the g e n e r a l p a t t e r n . Having a c h i e v e d t h i s , i t merely remains to e s t a b l i s h o n e s e l f unambiguously by a q u i s i t i o n of the a p p r o p r i a t e s t a t u s symbols. The objeot of t h i s guide i s theref o r e , t o analyses the main l e v e l s •of Union o r g a n i s a t i o n , and t o p o i n t out some o f the mare obvious symbols other than the C o l c u t t t o s w % B a s i c a l l y , members of the Union, by which term I mean those who have paid the-stipulated fees (or rather have them p a i d ) , f a l l i n t o three o a t — a g o r i e s , which f o r ease of i d e n t i f i c a t i o n I w i l l d e s i g n a t e : Top Men, Keen Types and Brown-Baggers. The l a t t e r . f o r m , an overwhelming m a j o r i t y and are e s s e n t i a l to the smooth running of the o r g a n i z a t i o n . By vbluntardlyt f 6 r e g o i n g t h e i r l e g i t i m a t e r i g h t s , they f r e e the f i n a n c e s and f a c i l i t i e s of v'the Union, whioh a r e , i n any oaso, q u i t e inadequate to c a t e r f o r a l l p o t e n t i a l customers, f o r the use of the l e s s - a e a d e m l o a l l y f i x a t e d . Brown-Baggers a r e u s u a l l y smartly d r e s s e d and have the appearance of harbouring i n o i p i e n t u l c e r s . By no means a r e t h e y *e~*be oonfaaed w i t h those o t h e r smartly dressed men of h u r r i e d s t e p and preoccupied e x p r e s s i o n , whom you w i l l f i n d are going not to l e o t u r e s but to oommittee meetings. These are Tpp ilen ( o r Union O f f i c i a l s ) and r e a l l y are harbouring u l c e r s , i n s p i t e of the t e n n i s , Suoh men w i l l often be seen wearing o u r i o u s t i e s on Thursdays: t h i s i s d e f i n i t e l y the u l t i m a t e s t a t u s symbol s a r t o r i a l w i s e . Between these e l e g a n t extremes s l o u c h a v a r i e t y of o i k s , odds and sods, c l e a n - l i m b e d , c l e a r . e y e d quick t h i n k i n g B r i t i s h Youths, e t s . , who alone p r o v i d e the a d m i n i s t r a t o r s w i t h something t o a d m i n i s t r a t e . I t i s to them, the very baokbone of our G l o r i o u s •College, that, t h e s e remarks a r e p r i m a r i l y dlraoted. Who e l s e reads F e l i x any way; i t i s . n o s u b s t i t u t e f a r 2** Times, Wool, etc. These Keen^Typee oan be s u b - d i v i d e d i n t o B e e r d r i n k e r s and Others. This d i s t i n s t i o n tends to beoome r a t h e r ' i n d i s t i n c t • e s p e c i a l l y around d o s i n g time. Nevert h e - l e s s one s h o u l d p o i n t out the o f f i c i a l objeot of F r e h e r s Dinners i s to l o o ate the obvious supping t a l e n t as e a r l y as p o s s i b l e w i t h a view to grooming i t f o r f u t u r e stardom. ]^«ajjeo$ive S p o r t i n g Types s h o u l d bear t h i s w e l l i n mind e s p e c i a l l y when not r e a l l y f i r s t t e a s m a t e r i a l ; i t oan make a l l ' the* difference . Those, who d o n l t happen to l i k e beer ( e s p e c i a l l y the southern v a r i e t i e s d e r i v e d by d e g r a d a t i o n from denatured dish-water) sftould, in-gene r a l and along w i t h the l e s s e n e r g e t i o beer d r i n k e r s head f o r the l e s s e r g l o r i e s and g r e a t e r oomforts o f f e r e d by the numerous S o c i a l .Clubs, Sou'ld you be E x s o u t i v e ' m a t e r i a l ' t h i s r o u t e t o the Top i s not unduly disadvantageous.

S E E K E R S The sain objective of.Joining any c l u b i s t o get e l e c t e d to the ccatmittee, 33»&« i s simply a maSter vT getting: pbsed and seoonded by other p r o s p e c t i v e oommittee members an r e t u r n f o r similar favours. Having thus become a demoora t i o a l l y chosen r e p r e s e n t a t i v e on as many committees as p o s s i b l e you w i l l then stand 3ome'sort of chance of g e t t i n g i n to H o s t e l I t . i s ofcourse t r u e t h a t some F r e s h e r s a r e already i n r e s i d e n c e . We can only hope, t h a t the Union w i l l survive this fundamental blow to i t s struoture . The optimum p o s i t i o n i 3 to have been i n r e s i d e n c e as long as p o s s i b l e and then to move i n t o a f l a t i n Queen's Gate; but t h i s takes time. Meanwhile, you s h o u l d a q u i r e a motor b i k e or b a t t e r e d o l d par, which w i l l be dead cheap i n view of the advent of V e h i c l e T e s t i n g , and park i t in sens prominent place. I t i s an advantage to be seen working on i t at i n t e r v a l s , s i n c e i t w i l l not then be neoeaaary f o r the thing to astaally go and money oan be saved on p e t r o l , 'On the academic s i d e i t can be a good t h i n g to repeat a y e a r but t h i s i s t r i c k y and, i n any case, you w i l l want to get a s u f f i c i e n t l y good degree to do a i . G . course. This i s e s s e n t i a l i f you are to f u l f i l l your Union p o t e n t i a l . I n g e n e r a l , do not make the mistake of pushing tooramubh; i t rubs people up the wrong way. For example don't go jumping S e f r e o t o r y queues, however long, just to.be seen w i t h the r i g h t people; i t i s much b e t t e r to buy them a d r i n k i n the Bar afterwards. They may buy you one some day and then you are i n - a f t e r a fashion. A p o l i c y of c o n f o r m i t y w i t h i n your chosen group always -pays o f f best.' ' The f a o t that t h i s group may hold r a d i c a l o p i n i o n s ; pro-N.U.S.-, down-with-Council, e t c . , i s n e i t h e r here nor there p r o v i d e d you are consistent. By a l l means a i r your views i n F e l l * " a n d at Union Meetings, then everyone w i l l know where you stand. That i 3 the e a e n t i a l p o i n t . I have, of n e c e s i t y , had t o generalise e x t e n s i v e l y i n t h i s short treatise. N e v e r - t h e - l e s s i t i s my hope that a c a r e f u l a p p r a i s a l of my remarks, w i l l a s s i s t the new comer i n a d a p t i n g himself to thi3 n o v e l environment. And the b e s t of B r i t i s h l u c k l Diogenes. FOOTNOTE; Any l a o k of mention of ICWA, ULU e t c . , i s f u l l y premeditated.

And that was a l l - f o r a moment , nothing happened, the cigarettes glowed on,the smoke rose upwards, then: "Okay, Lights" - the director slewed round in bis chair. "I think y o u ' l l agree,Nicky, that was pretty hopeless., We'll have a re-shoot, but i f you can't do better - wail, we'll have to get someone else. Dejan_.it a l l , the s c r i p t says ' terror i n the eyes'. Yours were aa t e r r i f i e d as the herrings." I stood at the back of the projection room and watched the f a l l i n g star.

F A L L I N G

S T A R

I stood i n the dark and watched, Nicholas K. Housman had had this coming t o him f o r a long time, the e g o t i s t i c a l swine. So I stood i n the dark and s m i l e d . The amerioan d i p l o m a t i s t p a t tered down the s t a i r s from the Emb basay. Briefcase under arm, carnat i o n i n buttonhole and the emaoula t e l y clean suede gloves gripping the elegantly tapered cane, he swung off down the road into the dusk. The confident stride of the man who oontrolled".the destiny ies of hundreds of states, thousands of towns, m i l l i o n s of l i v e s , oould be heard long a f t e r he had disappeared into the f a i l i n g light. The tread of his follower was Furtive, the very antithesis. skulking, the swarthy foreignerkept the Ambassador i n sight. They threaded t h e i r way through the Belgradian Mews country, through the thickening yellow gloom, over the glistening eobble-stenes. They were i n the heart of the maze now. They pass ~ed t h e pink and yellow doored f l a t s and the long lines of d i r t y garages. The*foreigner knocked on a garage whioh instantly opened on well o i l ed hinges. But we f o l l o w e d the striding American along the f o o t of the r a v i n e formed by the tower ing f l a t s , passed the battered dustbins, t h e i r l i d s askew, with the emaciated kitten gnawing a t the rotting herring with the phosphorescent f l e s h . The American paused on,the corner and fumbled f o r h i s g o l d c i g a r e t t e case. 4ie oatoh him up here'beneath the cone of feefble " l i g h t e m i t t e d by the s t r e e t lamp w i t h the d r a m a t i c a l l y broken pane. Its rays s l a n t e d h i s w e l l - n o u r i s h e d f a c e and deep-set eyes. The rumble of West"*End t r a f f i c c o u l d be heard i n the d i s t a n c e and was now j o i n e d by the p u r r i n g of a l a r g e c a r as i t crawled up the mews. Ha t o s s e d the maftch away and stepped on to the c o b b l e d road. The Renault's h e a d l i g h t s p i o k e d him o u t . The r o a r of t h i r t y horses, r e l e a s e d s i m u l t a n e o u s l y , r i c o c h e t t e d up the mews. Housman threw h i m s e l f desp e r a t e l y backwards,blinded by the blazing lamps. He s l i p p e d on the wet cobbles.' H i s l e g s waved g r o t e s q u e l y i n the a i r . The s i l v e r b u f f e r r e a r e d over him, the o n - s i d e t y r e s soythed towards h i s body. F r a n t i c a l l y he r o l led i n t o the g u t t e r . The next second the c o l d g r i t t y rubber appeared t o pass over h i s elegantly creased trouserleg. The c a r j o l t e d and swerved and Houseman must have f e l t the heat o f the exhaust beat on h i s f a c e . The c a r skidded to a h a l t . The Amerioan l a y there w r i t h i n g i n a pool,of i r r i d e s c e n t o i l - s t a i n e d water, w r i t h i n g amongst those b e a u t i f u l c o l o u r s . That e x p r e s s i o n on h i s f a c e - i t was damned funny r e a l l y , I c o u l d h a r d l y s t o p myself-laughing. The doors slammed. Housman made a desperate s t r u g g l e to avoid the i r o n bar which f l a s h e d down on his c l o s e - c r o p p e d s k u l l - but i t ' s d i f f i o u l t to move f a s t when b o t h y o u r legs are broken. That p a r t was done well enough. The now f i l t h y suede gloves feebly warded o f f the blow, but i t landed neatly on h i s temple. His head dropped back i n t o the o i l - s t a i n e d water and the blood, t r i c k i n g from h i s ear, added i t s l u s t r e t o those b e a u t i f u l colours.


4

F E L I X

F r e e

S p e e c h Dear S i r ,

Dear S i r ,

Ave atque valei No sooner here than gone again. Our editor takes leave of us to take on a rather higher position, and the editorship f a l l s to Rob Cheeney. We wish both past and future editors luck i n t h e i r new jobs.sBbth we f e e l w i l l need i t .

I am w r i t i n g t o express my amazement and d i s g u s t a t the c h i l d i s h d r i v e l l i n g s of R. T.L.Fotheringham. I must assume t h a t he comes from RSK,as/only there oan one f i n d suoh immature e x p r e s s i o n of the o l d White Sahib o u l t . Mr.Fotheringham objects* t o the i n t e r m i n a b l e w r a n g l i n g s encount e r e d a t Union Meetings. S u r e l y the whole p o i n t o f a Union Meeting i s t o a l l o w each member the o p p o r t u n i t y t o express h i s views on the r u n n i n g o f h i s Union. Perhaps Mr.Fotheringham f o r g e t s t h a t the Union belongs t o a l l i t s memb e r s and not t o the s h e l t e r e d few. - even the s l i m y l e f t - w i n g e r s pay t h e i r f e e s . As f a r as the p r o p a g a t i o n o f new s o c i e t i e s i s concerned,Mr.Fotheringham aaatly t w i s t s tha- facts'. t o s u i t - h i s d i s t o r t e d argument. D e s p i t e a Union meeti n g r e s o l u t i o n supportin g the B o y c o t t , there has never been a Boycott s o c i e t y , and there has never been any s u g g e s t i o n of a P a c i f i s t S o c i e t y . Mr.Fotheringham o b j e c t s ^o the l o g i c a l s u g g e s t i o n that the P r e s i d e n t be e l e c t e d by the Union General Meeting. Obviously,the o n l y hope o f h a v i n g a P r e s ident supporting h i s v i o l e n t l y reactiona r y views i s t o have the e l e c t i o n done i n camera b y a few s y c o p h a n t i c o r o n i e a , p u r p o r t i n g t o r e p r e s e n t the more respons i b l e elements of the C o l l e g e , I suggest t h a t Mr.Fotheringham r e t u r n s t o the home o f the gentleman and exgrcises his venom b y whipping a few wogs. Yours F a i t h f u l l y , J.Watson.

I demand an apologyj Your i n f amous r a g h a s ( i n a d v e r t e n t l y ) c o m m i t t e d a gross s l a n d e r on my name and lowered my reputation from next-to-nothing t o nothi n g - a t - a l l . But perhaps I - s h o u l d e x p l a i n the s i t u a t i o n . I t a l l began l a s t Wednesday when I bought a copy o f your l a t e s t i s s u e and t u r n e d i n a d e s u l t o r y f a s h i o n t o the E d i t o r i a l page-I was o u r i o u s t o see who was producing the paper t h i s y e a r . I was e l e c t r i f i e d t o see,at the bottom o f the l i s t , t h a t I was b u s i n e s s manager. I d i d n ' t remember b e i n g a p p o i n t e d t o t h i s p o s t , b u t that i s not s u r p r i s i n g since I usually f o r g e t a whole p i l e of junk - s c i e n c e f o r i n s t a n o e - over the summer v a c a t i o n . But then i t s t r u c k me t h a t I was h o l d i n g a espy i n my hand w i t h o u t anyone h a v i n g t o l d me t o get on w i t h the busi n e s s o f managing; - I mean the managing of the b u s i n e s s , o r whatever I was supposed t o do. That was most odd;how the h e l l would y o u have produced the w r e t ohed t h i n g w i t h o u t my a s s i s t a n c e ? I was h e g i n i n g t o get r e a l l y w o r r i e d - was. I s u f f e r i n g from a P e o u l i a r Case o f Amnesia? Had I imagined t h e whole thing?Was i t r e a l l y F e l i x I waa holdlng?Where was I ? . . ....Who was I ? What was I ? A l i g h t dawned, - i t wasn't me a t a l l , but someone e l s e ; t h e r e i s another P. Vfoung in. the c o l l e g e . Now S i r , y o u oan understand my f e e l i n g s about t h i s matter and you undoubtedly see the reasonableness of my r e q u e s t . I f - as I suspect - t h i s "P. Young"is r e a l l y p.B.Young,or P.Z.Young, o r even P.Q.R.S.Young,would you p l e a s e p r i n t h i s f u l l complement of i n i t i a l s ; i f he has j u s t one name would you b r i n g i t t o the n o t i o e of the whole of I.C. t h a t I am not your b u s i n e s s manager. Yours F a i t h f u l l y , P.Young.

Dear S i r ,

F E L I X

B O A R D

J.Carter. D.Wilbraham. R.Cheeney. M.Crawley. D.Gilb-irt. Pain Gregory, P.Young.

Editor. Subi-Editor. Jtews-Editor, Sports Editor. P r o d u c t i o n Manager Secretary. Buisness Manager.

I n r e p l y to c e r t a i n remarks about the nomenclature o f the b u s i n e s s manager o f F e l i x , I must t e l l you t h a t he i s P.Young,and,as f a r as I kacm Young i s . the b e a r e r o f the name P.Young. I f P.Young wishes t o d i s s o c i a t e hims e l f from F e l i x , h e w i l l have t o e i t h e r a l t e r h i s name o r adopt the t i t l e P P . ^ J i . B.Young h i m s e l f . I suggest he has i n v e n t e d ths name f o r h i m s e l f . I s P.Young,sir,a nomie-plume? r i s i t a w i l d f r e a k o f P. Young's i m a g i n a t i o n ? I , s i r , a m P,Young,and refine t o d i s a p p e a r merely a t t h e whim o f an anonymous p r e p a r e r o f m i n e r a l w a t e r s , »ho has assumed my name. Yours F a i t h f u l l y , P.Young.(Business Manager) r

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At an e x t r a o r d i n a r y meeting o f the I . C . Union C o u n o i l on F r i d a y l a s t , J . C a r t e r was e l e c t e d Hon.Sec. o f I.C. C o u n o i l a u t h o r i s e d the ROC t o a c t i n accordance w i t h i t s proposed c o n s t i t u t i o n and t o proceed w i t h the eleoti,on of o f f i c e r s and o t h e r r e q u i r e d b u s i n e s s . C o u n c i l a u t h o r i s e d the'Union e x e c u t i v e committee t o a p p o i n t a C a r n i v a l O r g a n i s e r so t h a t he might s t a r t h i s work a s Boon as possible.

A D V E R T I S E M E N T S

WITH? WHERE? WHEN? WATCH

I.C. and Bedford c o l l e g e s Y.H.A. group. The Lake D i s t r i o t , B u t t e r m e r e Y.H. 19th-21st November. the c l u b n o t i o e - b o a r d .

College Evening Chapel i s held every F r i d a y i n Holy T r i n i t y Churoh a t 5-05pm. The Rev.D.W.Cleverley F o r d g i v e s a s h o r t address.

FOE SALE: Musical slid e r o l e , plays "I'm counting on yea* when log-Tog scales are operated. Cheap. Box Ho. Z

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BABSAIK.OFFER 0.£» JsuK.-J1arr.sa3 f « .sale PRICE 17 Struts OR Consider Exchange for Chinese Dictionary,

To

Mr.R.T.L.Fotheringham. Dear S i r ,

I Due t o t h e a l e a k o f art)-' onymity t h a t surrounds you,there i s no r e c o r d o f you b e i n g a t I . e . , I am f o r c e d to communicate w i t h you i n t h i s f a s h i o n . You s t a t e that l a s t y e a r t h e r e was an attempt made t o f o r m a South A f r i c a n Boycott s o c i a t y . l t i s t r u e t h a t there was a South A f r i c a n s o c i e t y proposed,but i t s aim was t o c o u n t e r the boyoott and i t v e r y soon f a i l e d due t o l a o k o f support. However,you may be r e f e r r i n g t o the Boyoott sub-oommittee of the I n t e r n a t i o n a l R e l a t i o n s Club. I would p o i n t e a t t h a t t h i s i s aa e s t a b l i s h e d eoamittae and not a proposed s o c i e t y . Moreover, t o my knowledge there has been no attempt t o f o r m any o t h e r group t o d e a l w i t h t h i s a u b j e o t . What then were you r e f e r r i n g t o i n your l e t t e r i n the l a s t i s s u e of F e l i x ? I f you were r e f e r r i n g t o the IRC sub-oommittee,then.aa f o u n d e r o f t h i s aootaittee.and a s Hon.Sec o f the IRC,I would appear t o q u a l i f y as " a person i n charge o f a s o c i e t y and t r y i n g t o form a South A f r i c a n b o y o o t t s o c i e t y . " Thus,I am desc r i b e d by you a s "a s l i m y l e f t - w i n g F o o t n i c k " o r communist. My main o c c u p a t i o n , I d i s c o v e r , i s e i t h e r dragging out Union Meetings by i n t e r m i n a b l e w r a n g l i n g s , o r i n s i d i o u s l y s l i d i n g myself i n t o command of s o o i e t i e s . I n r e p l y , I would say t h a t *> b e f o r e y o u r l e t t e r , I thought I was a r e l a t i v e l y normal I..ACKILLAN TORY. I g e n u i n e l y thought t h a t I had been d e m o c r a t i c a l l y e l e c t e d t o my o f f i c e and I f e l t s u r e t h a t try speeches a t Union meetings neve r l a s t e d more t h a n a minute. Thus I would ask you t o h e l p me. I f you'are not mistaken,then,can you e x p l a i n how,overnight,I have turned i n t o the e v i l monster you d e s c r i b e . I e a g e r l y await y o u r esteemed reply. Yours F a i t h f u l l y , D.S.Keroer.


5

FELIX

SOCCER

J U D O

L a s t y e a r the Club had a most im- p r e s s i v e season, b r i n g i n g o f f s e v e r a l rather s u r p r i s i n g -victories. Perhaps the most p l e a s i n g r e s u l t o f the season was a win over a r a t h e r l a r g e and h e f t y Met. P o l i c e team a f t e r some v i g o r o u s and s p i r i t e d f i g h t i n g . Wo are hoping t o have a f a i r l y e x t e n s i v e programme o f matches a g a i n t h i s y e a r and I would once a g a i n l i k e to appeal t o members o f I.C. t o a l l o w the p o l i c e team t o come s a f e l y t o the gym. as we would l i k e t o have a bash at them f i r s t .

On the f i r s t Wednesday and Saturday a f t ernoons of term the C o l l e g e Soccer t r i a l s mare h e l d a t Harlington.About 70 f r e s h e r s attended,and I should l i k e to take t h i s o p p o r t u n i t y of -welcoming them t o the Club.The standard of f o o t b a l l amongst the f r e s h e r s appeared to be h i g h , a nd as a l a r g e number of l a s t years' p l a y e r s are s t i l l i n C o l l e g e , I t h i n k we can l o o k forward to another enjoyable and s u c c e s s f u l season,It i s i n e v i t a b l e , h o w e v e r , t h a t i t w i l l taKe one or two weeks befor e the teams s e t t l e down,and f r e s h e r s should not become too i m p a t i e n t i f i n i t i a l l y they f i n d they are p l a y i n g i n a team whose f o o t b a l l r e a l l y does not s u i t t h e i r own a b i l i t y . I t i s hoped,as f o r l a s t season, to run seven teams.As w e l l as matches i n the London U n i v e r s i t y Leagues many f r i e n d l y matches have been arranged so t h a t most people w i l l be p l a y i n g i n two matches each week.Trips to Swansea,Oxf o r d , Cambridge, Southampton.etc. have been arranged and i t i s hoped t h a t each team w i l l make a t l e a s t one t r i p d u r i n g the s e s s i o n . This season i a p a r t i c u l a r l y important i n as much as we hope to comp l e t e a h a t - t r i c k o f London U n i v e r s i t y Cup P i n a l winoVIn the 1959 and I960 Cup F i n a l s . , r e s p e c t i v e l y , K i n g s ! and G o l d smiths were beaten and t h i s s e s s i o n we must a g a i n s t a r t as f a v o u r i t e s . N i n e o f l a s t year's w i n n i n g s i d e are s t i l l i n College. The C o l l s g * C l i i b has, i n the- paarft, s u p p l i e d a l a r g e number of p l a y e r s t o the U n i v e r s i t y XI's,and i t i s probable t h a t t h i s t r a d i t i o n w i l l be continued'. B a s i l Jamea,the Welsh Amateur toternaÂťWi o n a l , h a s a g a i n been e l e c t e d c a p t a i n , w h i l e C o l i n Caseraore i s f i x t u r e s s e c r e t ary. I was s o r r y t o see John Ereece

w a l k i n g about' C o l l e g e w i t h h i s arm i n a s l i n g . I hope John makes a speedy r e c o v ery,and t h a t we w i l l see him i n a c t i o n a g a i n a f t e r Christmas. F i x t u r e cards are now a v a i l a b l e and can be obtained from o f f i c i a l s of the C l u b . T r a i n i n g s e s s i o n s are h e l d on Tuesdays and Thursdays a t 12.30 p.m.. F i n a l l y I should l i k e to remind everyone t o t i c k t h e i r names o f f on the team sheets as e a r l y as p o s s i b l e .

CROSS

C O U N T R Y

At the Freshers reception,twenty f r e s hers sighed on f o r the club. On Wednesday 5th October,ten of these accompanied byaa similar number of old lags,went to Petersham f o r a training run. Although this run was o f f i c i a l l y not competitive,two freshers,led Wilkina and John Young,showad excellent form. Despite the absence of captain Jim Bernard, I.C.runners were' very much to the fore i n the UL "trials held over 65 miles at Parliament H i l l F i e l d s on Saturday 8 t h October, John Collins and John Cleator finished 6 t h and 7 t h , while Fete Warren was 9 t h . The last named followed by Sod Wilkina,Dave Hammonds and John Young. Ted Wilkins and John Young were the only freshmen from any oollege to he placed, i n $he f i r s t twenty.

L a s t y e a r the Club had three members, J.Sheperd, M . B u t l e r , and N.Ramsbottom who fought r e g u l a r l y f o r the U n i v e r s i t y team and r e p r e s e n t e d t h e combined South E a s t England U n i v e s i t i e s team. John Sheperd a l s o fought h i s way i n t o the E n g l i s h team and i s now r e s e r v e t o t h e Great B r i t a i n team. T h i s term we are h o l d i n g a course f o r b e g i n n e r s on Wednesday evenings i n which we a r e hoping t o t e a c h t h e a r t o f break- f a l l i n g and some o f the b a s i c throws o f judo. Why not come a l o n g and be secure i n the knowledge t h a t you w i l l be a b l e t o defend y o u r s e l f wherever you go, whene v e r you are f i t t o go out.


F E L I X

R U G B Y A . C . C .

M E E T I N G

On rhursday,6th October, twenty members of the AGO assembled i n the Snack b a r and the chairman,Mr,P.Davies,opened the meeting with- characteristic efficiency at about 5-30 pm. The minutes of the l a s t meeting were read and passed as atrue and correct record,there being no alternative, since of the assembled company o n l y the Chairman and the two secretaries had been at the last meeting. Under t!ie "matters arising",Mr,MacCrae asked i f the fence w h i c h the hockey c l u b had asked f o r had been ereoted.The Chairman replied i n the negative,but s a i d that as an alternative the grass had been a l l owed to grow and he hoped this would provide a suitable solution. He added that he was s t i l l Saconsultation with the groundsman about t h i s . In reply to a polite question from the chair, the Hon,Sec. said that there was no oorredpondenoe. •: lections followed. For the vacant post of Vice Chairman,there was one candidate only,Mr.Brough. He was duly elected. N. Ramsbottom and C,MaoCrae were elected to the 'Executive.Mr.Kealey was elected to the eolours sub-committee and was also appointed gymnasium organiser. On the question of finance,the Chairman emphasised the importance of ""the accuracy of the estimates,so t h a t the necessity Bfb asking f o r supplementary grants at a b a t e r date night be avoided. This i s important because the ACC budget i s worked out at tha beginning of the session and supplementary grants tend to upset .the balance.

The F r e s h e r ' s r e c e p t i o n proved once a g a i n t h a t the game i s i n c r e a s i n g i n p o p u l a r i t y . T h i s y e a r 100 freshmen o r thereabouts have expressed the w i s h t o p l a y . Attendance a t the c o n s t i t u e n t c o l l e g e t r i a l s on Wednesday and the I . C . t r i a l s on S a t u r d a y ( d e 3 p i t e the t e r r i b l e weather)were e x c e l l e n t . ULU a l s o h e l d t h e i r t r i a l s on Saturday, and 11 I.C.men were t h e r e . Two I.C. f r e s hers,P.McCormick on the wlng,and A.T.Butl e r , a t c e n t r e , a r e p l a y i n g i n the u n i v e r s i t y ' s f i r s t matoh.Congratulations t o these two and the " o l d l a g s " who managed t o keep t h e i r p l a c e s , i n c l u d i n g K r i s Wronski, c a p t a i n f o r the second y e a r i n s u c c e s s i o n . T h i s season,every Monday evening,the c l u b w i l l have the use o f the gym.from 5p.m. onwards f o r c i r c u i t t r a i n i n g . T h i s toaining i s i n a d d i t i o n t o the u s u a l Tuesday and Thursday o u t i n g s i n the park. One l a s t word,please TICK) OFF as soon as p o s s i b l e .

The Chairman also said that a l l olub income must be paid d i r e c t l y to the Hon. Senior Treasurer(Dr.MoCoubrey)and that

L A W N

this money must not be used as a source of petty cash. This was to be obtained from Dr.MoCoubrey. Two tour reports war* read.The orioket club gave an expurgated version of the Devon tour,, and the Lawn Tennis olub gave an account of their tour i n Holland. With regard to the matter of colours, several observations of note were made by Mr.hill(Frea.I,C.U.). When the gymnasium timetable was d i s cussed, the Chairman asked i f the Athleti c <aub^pi®wides f a o U i t t e s f o r people who' wanVecf" to do olrouit training f o r the sake of c i c u i t training.Mr.Cleator s a i d that such "brownbaggers"would be welcome.to t r a i n with members o f the Athletic Club. Mr.Yorke said that these people ware quite welcome to t r a i n with the Boxing Olub (?) N. Ramsbottom drew attention t o the) untidy habits of certain weight-lifters i n the gymnasium. In reply.Mx,Hill said that t h e a Union rul e existed whioh empowered the Gymnasium Officer with the right to forbid people to uae the gymnasium without his approval,and that this rule oould be invoked i n suoh cases. Since there was not muoh other business, the meeting was closed"somewhere about

i —

. in -aj • i J

A team of seven l e f t London for Rotterdam on Wednesday 29th. June f o r a ten days tennis tour of the Netherlands. Unfortunately we were not able to send as Strang a team as we hoped, and only two of the touring team were r e g ular members of the 1st.VX. When the teur was f i r s t proposed r o s t of the College's better players had been enthusiastic, but at l a t e r stages found •'themselves unable to come for various reasons. Thus our h o s t s were.inevitably l e f t with a very erronious impression of our standard of play. Our f i r s t day i n Rotterdam was™ ipent i n sightseeing,and the following lay we travelled to Delft,the strongest of the Dutoh U n i v e r s i t i e s ^ o r our f i r s t matoh.Roger Haycock 3 f i r s t singles was against Wilhelm Maris,the Holland No.1, who had just returned from Wimbledon, having been beaten by Neale FraserJfeed less to aay,Maris won a l l h i s singles 1

fa*

Published by F E L I X BOARD, Imperial College Union. S.W.7

TENNIS

and doubles matches,and our o n l y v i c t o r y was i n the bootom doubles,where I a n Cameron and Tim M a r t i n won narrowly.Aftfit the match we were e n t e r t a i n e d magn i f i c e n t l y by the s t u d e n t s a t t h e i r club. From Delft we travelled to the Hague, After a day's sightseeing i n the Hague, we played our next match againt Leiden University, which was also l o s t , but only by a narrow margin. The most exciting match was between our f i r s t pair, Roger Haycock and D a v i d Glasser, and the Butoh f i r s t pair. I.C. just won

8-6,

9-11,

13-11.

Next day we went to Amsterdam, and played against the students on the m covered courts of the Amsterdam Lawn Tennis Club. The matoh was drawn 4 - 4 , Mioheal Bottomly and A l a n Metheroott, each winning two matches. The l a s t match was a friendly a f f a i r against Haarlem Lawn T e n n i s Club, and the following day we returned to London v i a Rotterdam.


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