The Newspaper of Imperial College Union
GUILDS PROF CRUSHES RCSU RAID Professor Anderson, one of the guests of honour at the Elec Eng F r e s h e r s ' D i n n e r , prevented R C S U from making away with Spanner and Bolt when he held on of the raiders in a deadlock and refused to release him until after the attackers had withdrawn.
Professor Anderson: Spanner bearer?
the next
G o r d o n B o w s e r , the E l e c t r i c a l Engineering Departmental Representative, had actively d i s s u a d e d freshers f r o m b u y i n g tickets for the d i n n e r , a n d consequently only forty-eight people were present i n the S e n i o r C o m m o n R o o m when the C i t y a n d G u i l d s ' mascots, S p a n n e r a n d B o l t , a r r i v e d b y v a n . A team from the R o y a l College of Science U n i o n a t t e m p t e d to steal t h e m as they were u n l o a d e d b u t o n b e i n g c o n f r o n t e d by s u p e r i o r n u m b e r s they were f o r c e d , b y m a s c o t r y rules, t o retire. L a t e r , a larger g r o u p o f a b o u t sixty charged the S C R , a n d d u r i n g the e n s u i n g scuffle a glass d o o r w a s shattered s h o w e r i n g D r C o r y a n d the student sitting next t o h i m w i t h b r o k e n glass. T h e student received several cuts f o r w h i c h first a i d was a d m i n i stered. B u t the attackers were a g a i n repelled.
T h e f i n a l a t t e m p t was made just before the after d i n n e r speeches, when some forty students g a i n e d access t h r o u g h two p r e v i o u s b o l t e d d o o r s . It was then that P r o f e s s o r A n d e r son d e m o n s t r a t e d h i s h i t h e r t o unsuspected w r e s t l i n g prowess. D r C o r y was later h e a r d t o r e m a r k that he w i s h e d that a l l f o r m a l d i n n e r s were as e n t e r t a i n ing. A s a result o f the d a m a g e caused d u r i n g the raid, I C U President Stephen Goulder s u m m o n e d the three C C U Presidents a n d drew their
RED KEN IN SOUTH KEN G L C Leader K e n Livingstone deliver e d a r e d - h o t a t t a c k o n T o r y p o l i c y , a n d i n p a r t i c u l a r its crushing of the F a r e ' s F a i r scheme a n d its attitude t o C i v i l D e f e n c e , w h e n he s p o k e as a guest o f the S o c i a l i s t Society t o a packed Great H a l l on Tuesday. M r Livingstone spoke for an h o u r a n d then answered questions f r o m the audience. ' R e d K e n ' is a n expert speaker a n d w i t h a l l the facts a n d figures at
No. 6 2 4 B H M M f l B H H B J i
his fingertips he was well able t o deal w i t h the p o i n t s raised. M r L i v i n g s t o n e described the c o n v o l u t e d legal b a c k g r o u n d t o the L a w - L o r d s ' q u a s h i n g o f the G r e a t e r L o n d o n C o u n c i l ' s fares p o l i c y ; the legal precedent used was the s u p p r e s s i o n o f P o p l a r C o u n t y C o u n c i l ' s attempt to give w o m e n e q u a l wages i n 1900. M o r e recently the A t t o r n e y continued on back page |Friday, O c t o b e r 2 2 , 1 9 8 2 |
attention to existing mascotry rules, n o t a b l y that there s h o u l d be n o w a n t o n v i o l e n c e o r d e s t r u c t i o n . A n agreement w a s also reached that there s h o u l d be no speeding b y C C U vehicles o n the c a m p u s a n d that a l l d a m a g e d a n d injuries s u s t a i n e d d u r i n g m a s c o t r y raids s h o u l d be r e ported i m m e d i a t e l y to the Union. T h e R o y a l C o l l e g e o f Science U n i o n has accepted- r e s p o n s i bility for the damage to the d o o r , f o r w h i c h they are e x pected t o receive a b i l l f r o m the Estates section.
J u n e last term at w h i c h the relevant M i n e s E n t s O f f i c e r , John McPherson, was present along with the other C C U Ents O f f i c e r s , the I C U E x e c a n d myself a n d other interested p a r t i e s . T h e result o f this meeting was that Ents would be responsible for booking two gigs and a film double bill with other p e o p l e w o r k i n g as a g r e e d . U n f o r t u n a t e l y , the p e r s o n r e s p o n s i b l e f o r the s m o o t h running of this event was Phil Greenstreet, so whilst I was at home, happily booking bands with Phil's failure there was noone t o l o o k after the o t h e r details and chaos was unleashed. Meanwhile I C U Exec began to assume that Freshers' Week was Dear Sir solely an Ents function, as I O n reading F E L I X on Friday suppose did the C C U s and in I was astounded to discover a p a r t i c u l a r M i n e s . T h e events letter concerning the Mines lack organised by Guilds and R C S in of involvement in Freshers' Freshers' Week showed at least Week—this being the first I'd that they were aware o f the heard of it. N o w the idea of concept but unfortunately Mines Freshers' Week was, that for the arranged a week of Freshers' first time, there would be a coevents. I can't blame my old ordinated set of activities and mate John Eagleson, I suppose, entertainments in the first week but as Mines V P he ought to involving all three C C U s , I C U have known where to go tiddlya n d I C E n t s . A m e e t i n g to winking this weekend without arrange details was held in mid-
Mines & Ents
relying on me to tell h i m . Byll Waterson I C U Ents Officer
Wellsoc Sexism Dear Martin As Publicity Officer for the H G Wells Society, I feel bound to reply to the letter from the W I S T Officers published in last week's F E L I X . In many ways I agree with what they had to say, and I accept that some people may have found the poster offensive. The reason for using the poster in q u e s t i o n was to a t t r a c t people's attention, make them read the poster and make them come along to Freshers' Fair. In these respects it has been a resounding success. I believe, however, that the students of Imperial College do not wish to pass a U G M motion which would effectively censor College posters. It is gross to suggest, as do the ladies o f W I S T , that a publicity officer should not use pictures which are "totally irrelevant to their society in order to advertise its existence". In c o n c l u s i o n , W e l l s o c is
indeed the society where everyone's face fits, no matter what their interests, creed or colour or political allegiance. I can see nothing in any poster that I have produced that contradicts this admirable ideal. David Rowe Dear Martin So the Wellsoc poster was offensive to W I S T et al. It was meant to be publicity and to stand out amongst the junk that most societies adorned College with over Freshers' Week. What with U G M motions and F E L I X articles Wellsoc seems to have obtained more attention than could ever have been hoped for, with the added bonus that W I S T have taken a free trip on our publicity bandwagon. I should like to point out that Wellsoc used a poster with a pair o f bare breasts last y e a r to advertise a lecture on vampires. There were no U G M motions on that one—perhaps it was thought more artistic than the last! Given this sort of ambiguity in reaction how is a m o t i o n c a l l i n g f o r almost random, public censorship going to solve any problems? We will probably have running continued on page 4.
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T h e y will give you a real feel of the challenge, intellectual stimulation and enjoyment of marketing management, and insight into the broad range of activities involved. Y o u will also have a chance to meet some of the wide variety of people with whom a marketing manager works. If you are interested in learning about M a r k e t i n g M a n a g e m e n t , you should apply as soon as possible. Please write to Stephen Philpott or D a v i d T h o m a s using an application form available at your Appointments/Careers Office, c/o Brand Promotion Division, Procter & Gamble L i m i t e d , P . O . Box 1 E E , Gosforth, Newcastle upon Tyne N E 9 9 1 E E . Alternatively just 'phone t h e m , reversing the charges, o n Newcastle (0632) 857141.The closing date for applications is 5th November 1982.
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| October 22,19821
IFELIX
A Grand Wink The long-awaited Rag
Stunt
great
on
Tiddlywink s
Saturday
success, raising
charity.
None
of
was
£980
the
a for
expected
problems from police or Chelsea
place a l o n g after
Nearly stituent
a
the
and
three
College U n i o n s
fifty Con-
started
from The Vale and tiddlywinked up
King's
Road
to
Sloane
trouble
over
Street,
but
police
and
collecting
licences the event was twice p u t off
a n d a new In
hundred
from
from
some
College arose.
students
Oxford
warnings
however, the
venue
keeping the
tradition,
contingent
School
Royal
winked
found.
with
their
of
from Mines
tiddles
single-
m i n d e d l y d o w n the m i d d l e o f the road,
while
the
more
cautious
S q u a r e . T h i s represented a b r e a k
members of C & G a n d R C S used
f r o m t r a d i t i o n , as u n t i l this y e a r
the p a v e m e n t s . T h e
t i d d l y w i n k i n g has a l w a y s
them
taken
past
which
route t o o k
Chelsea
was
College,
expected
to
be
r e g a r d e d by t h e i r students as a n infringement
on
their
territory;
but there was n o v i s i b l e from
within.
reaction
Furthermore,
p o l i c e p r e s e n c e ' w a s l i m i t e d to a discreet i n s p e c t o r , t w o sergeants a n d three c o n s t a b l e s w h o
raised
n o legal o b j e c t i o n s u n t i l S l o a n e Square point not
was
the to
reached.
s t u de n ts
propel
At
were
a c r o s s the p e d e s t r i a n
crossings,
as
caused
certain
already
amount
of
traffic
Union. Because livered
the
direct
the
same d a y ,
for
the
three
money to
was
MENCAP
individual CCUs
are
de-
F o u r bicycles, with a n estimated
on
t o t a l v a l u e o f £ 6 0 0 , were s t o l e n
totals not
available.
descended
behind
• Pioneer stereo turntable, s e m i automatic with strobe, as new, inc cartridge, only £45. Contact W Steen, ME3 or ring 736-5526. • 2 man ridge lent, 8 wks old, £25ono. Contact Fraser Simpson int 3655 or RSM letter-rack. •Ladies bike 26" wheels, £25, D E King, Mech Eng UG3. • R e g a R100 cartridge, £15, apply Nick Hunt, Mech Eng 3. •Bootleg tapes (early punk): HGFs, N i s m o i d s , T h e r m b u r n s , etc, S W Nield, Aero 2. • A n y o n e wishing to sell a judogi contact G Shields, EE2 with size and cost. Ta! • Wanted: Edinburgh Fringe T o u r Manager for Dramsoc. Your chance to beat cable TV in bringing art to the masses. Come to the Green Comm Rm at 7:00pm on Tuesday October 26, or to the Storeroom any time.
FELIX
on
from
the
Mines
in
from
Buildings-
a
pair
seems
con-
of
bolt-cutters.
likely that
carried
out
It
thieves
thorough
recon-
n a i s s a n c e o f the C o l l e g e
before
selecting None
a
the
suitable of
the
targets. machines
had
then
been registered w i t h s e c u r i t y ; all
the
students w i t h b i c y c l e s who have not yet d o n e so are a s k e d to go
customers c o m p l a i n e d of
to
lectors.
•Personal computer ZX81 16K Rampak and printer, £100 ono. Contact Deborah Prince, Zoology P G . •1 Radiomobile car radio, manual tuning, £12.50, good working order, ring 582-6773 (eves 6:00-8:00). • H o n d a Camino moped, T reg with indicators and top-box, years MoT and tax, excellent condition, £135, phone 648-4737.
masse
L i b r a r y , one
o r cables w h i c h were cut with a small
Sloane
students
en
Museum
R o y a l C o u r t tavern, where some harassed
Small Ads
around
The
t w o f r o m i n f r o n t o f the S c i e n c e
were a l l f as te n ed w i t h l i g h t c h a i n
T h e event d r e w to a close w i t h Square.
f r o m the C o l l e g e o n W e d n e s d a y :
front of M e c h E n g a n d one
gestion.
ring-o-roses
Insecurity
to the l a n d l o r d o n b e h a l f o f the
this
counters
had
and HM constabulary were all represented on Saturday.
asked
their
they
Guilds, RCS
by Rag
being
over-eager Chairman
col-
one
the of
security the
officer o n
Sherfield
level
Building
John
w i t h details o f the f r a m e n u m b e r ,
F e r g u s o n has w r i t t e n a n a p o l o g y
make and colour of their bicycle.
• A r e you an athlete? (S)training on y o u r o w n ? If so we meet 12:30, Thursdays in gymnasium, or contact R Flynn, Physics 2. • C o u l d the P G who has had a year's dancing at York and who was goig to come to the lesson last Monday but didn't, please come to this Mondays lesson to contact Rebecca May or through Physics 3 letter-racks. • D e a r Naunton can I borrow your pink ballet shoes and swan outfit, love the Green Hippo. • T o u r s of the Donatello Collection in the V a n d a (very n i ce in t o m a t o e sauce)? Contact the Italian Renisance Art Soc c/o Queintin Fontana FK. •Kawasaki Z200, 1978, 12,100 miles, 12mths, M o T and tax, v g c , £ 1 7 5 . Contact M Nobel, Pet Geol or ext 2156. • P h y s i c s Wanderers challenge anyone for matches on Sundays. We have a pitch. Contact D Warner via Physics letter-racks, PWRUA1. • D o u b l e r o o m , flat 21b H a m l e t Gardens, apply singley or as pair, 7417095 or contact Helen Bolt via Civ Eng letter-racks. • Y o u n g lady required to share flat (Head Tenancy) in Shepherd's Bush (non-smoker), please contact Caroline Low, Chem 3 pigeonholes. • S i n g l e room to let in flat for two in SW12, central heating, lounge, kitchen and bath, £23pw. Bing L Hui, Man Sci (MSc) thru letter racks. • T w o people needed to share double room in flat in Putney, nearest tube: Putney Bridge, attractions: telephone,
deep freeze, two TVs (one colour with teletext), video, large garden, kitchen, bathroom, nice district and millions of shops within spitting distance, rent £22pw, 4 Burstock Road, SW15, phone 785-6952. •Shared room to let for male student, 12mins walk from IC in G l e d h o w Gdns, fully furnished, sharing with exIC student and one other in basement flat, £110pcm. •Flatshare for one male in 204 Hamlet Gardens, rent £18.50pw. Flat includes lounge with c o l o u r T V , two bathrooms and washing machine. Contact M Tyrrell, Chem Eng 2 or ring 7487503. • G i r l required to share flat for eight in Hamlet Gardens, large double room overlooking Ravenscourt Park, rent £ 1 7 p w . C o n t a c t Helena Branwell, Biochem 2 or ring 728-3291 and ask for flat 207. • F o r s a l e : Five ti cket s for J u l i o Iglesias concert at Albert Hall on Wed Oct 27, £ 1 . 5 0 e a c h . C o n t a c t Paul McNamara, Mech Eng 2. • G i r l required to share double room with Julio Iglesias on Wed Oct 27. For further details contact Albert Hall, Mech Eng 2 or phone 327-4891 and ask for 'H'. •Part-time job evening/day, £2 per hour, for details ring Debbie, 2780891. • T o whom it may concern: Thank you for returning my wallet. Jane Glascodine. • F o u n d at Willis Jackson House Party last Friday, one pair of ladies red heels. Contact Gerard Livett, Chem 2.
lOctober 22, 1982
• Neil: T h a n k s for the honourable mentin. Pity you're such a prick. Or was it Matt ? • N i c o l a C I admit it was me all along J W. PS: no moping or groping. • C o v e n t Garden Tragedy performances: Holland Club Thurs Oct 28; Southside Bar Fri Oct 29. An evening in an eighteenth century brothel, with Dramsoc's Edinburgh Fringe production. • T o all British Council Sponsored Students: Please could you take your British Council health card to the Health Centre before the end of October. • F o u n d in the J C R : U n p l e a s a n t brown, yellow and blue hooped sweater, please collect A M P , Chem 3. • R S M : Many thanks to those who attended the tiddlywinks in the drizzle on Saturday. A quick note of some things to come: Met & Mat Sci Freshers' Dinner, 7:00pm, Fri Oct 22, meet Union Bar; Paint Your Face Disco, 8:30pm. Sat Oct 23, J C R ; Min Res Eng Freshers' Dinner, Fri Oct 29, meet Union Bar. • B i k e Club meet for their regular Sunday run at 10:00am, Beit Arch. We'll be doing 40-50 miles into some nice countryside (and a nice noshhouse half-way). Anyone welcome (you can join there!). •Welfare Officer is available in the Union O f f i ce 12:45-1:30, M o n d a y , Tuesdays and Thursdays for almost anything! •Want to learn to fly? Then come along to the Gliding Club, meetings in Aero 254, every Thursday at 5:30pm. Page3
Letters continued from page 2. b a t t l e s b e t w e e n the v a r i o u s sectarian societies i n C o l l e g e as they attempt to have each other r e m o v e d f r o m the U n i o n ' s list o f ' a p p r o v e i l advertisers'. Yours Michael MacClancy Wellsoc C h a i r m a n P S : W h o said the figure w i t h the h a n d o n the z i p p e r was a man?
News Reporting Dear Martin O f f i c i a l s f r o m several societies have c o m p l a i n e d recently that certain news articles have included too little/too m u c h / incorrect/too embarrasingly correct i n f o r m a t i o n a b o u t their a c t i v i t i e s , while they have t a k e n n o measures to s u p p l y F E L I X w i t h i n f o r m a t i o n . W h e r e a s I can sometimes contact society officials who have internal telephones, finding undergraduates o n a T h u r s d a y aftern o o n w h e n there are six o t h e r news stories to w r i t e u p is just not p o s s i b l e . C o n t r a r y to p o p u l a r b e l i e f a n d established precedent, we d o try to p r i n t news as a c c u r a t e l y as possible. I n the case o f the W I S T article o f a f o r t n i g h t ago, m y i n f o r m a t i o n was s u p p l i e d by W e l l s o c (a v e r y p u b l i c i t y conscious organisation) and f r o m that bottomless pit (of i n f o r m a t i o n ) the U n i o n O f f i c e , in the absence o f any attempt by Mesdemoiselles N a h o n and W a t t s to contact me. Henceforth, any complaints f r o m societies w h i c h have p e r f o r m e d s o m e vaguely newsw o r t h y feat a n d made no attempt to s u p p l y us with i n f o r m a t i o n w i l l be s t u d i o u s l y i g n o r e d . A n y o n e w h o believes that it is a reporter's f u n c t i o n to seek out i n f o r m a t i o n s h o u l d a p p l y to the F E L I X O f f i c e for the j o b (people w h o have h a d to l o o k up m o r e t h a n three w o r d s in this letter need not a p p l y ) . U n t i l I have a news staff o f m o r e t h a n t w o people ( w i l l they breed in c a p t i v i t y ? ) y o u w i l l have to put up w i t h what 1 write. Your raving reporter A d r i a n James News Edito r
RCS
Thuggery
Dear Sir W e have reason to c o m p l a i n o f the R C S U lackeys a n d m i n i o n s w h o o r g a n i s e d the C h e m i s t r y F r e s h e r s ' D i n n e r on T u e s d a y O c t o b e r 19.
Page 4
I, a n d t h r e e f r i e n d s , w e r e h o l d i n g a c o n v e r s a t i o n in an i s o l a t e d part o f the J C R — a w a y f r o m the ' a c t i o n ' — w h e n we were a p p r o a c h e d by M r C h a r l e s F u l l e r , R C S H o n Sec, a n d t o l d , nay o r d e r e d , to leave the premises. O n o u r reluctance to c o m p l y — d u e to o u r rights to r e m a i n in the J C R u n d e r U n i o n r u l e s — C h a s b r o u g h t over his ' h e a v i e s ' a n d threatened us w i t h v i o l e n c e , telling us l o ' F u c k O f f a n d i f we d i d not leave we w o u l d be f o r c i b l y e j e c t e d f r o m the room. W e began to leave peacefully but harassment c o n t i n u e d a n d my three colleagues actually pu s h ed t h r o u g h the d o o r s . W e believe that this b e h a v i o u r was u n j u s t i f i e d a n d offensive. E v e n one of the ' b o u n c e r s ' a d m i t t e d that we h a d the right to be there but he w a n t e d a pint so we h a d to get out. We demand a printed apology a n d a c o m m i t m e n t that this w i l l never h a p p e n to us or a n y other students a g a i n . Yours sincerely Jon Clark C Burgess Robert Reynolds Paul Griffin
1. T h e ' w o n d e r f u l ' l e t t e r w h i c h y o u q u o t e f r o m the R C S U B r o a d s h e e t as w r i t t e n by D e b b i e C o o p e r , was, so 1 have been i n f o r m e d , not a c t u a l l y w r i t t e n b y her, n o r d i d she k n o w that a n y such article was g o i n g to be i n c l u d e d i n B r o a d s h e e t . It appears that the letter was a f a b r i c a t i o n — a forgery. 2. T h e contents o f the letter are s i m p l y not true, ie they are either lies o r the result o f some i m m e n s e m i s t a k e on the a u ' hor's part. I in no way e n c o u a g e d Ms D e b b i e C o o p e r to dress up in " n o t h i n g but a sweatshirt a n d u n d e r w e a r " . I was not present w h e n it took place a n d d i d not
Geoff Evans LS2 Soc Rep
Dear Sir O K I let M a r k S m i t h get away w i t h it once but n o w he has repeated his e r r o r . T h e classic Outer Limits episode ' F i e n d with a G l a s s H a n d ' by R a y B r a d b u r y does not exist. T h e classic Outer Limits episode ' D e m o n w i t h a G l a s s H a n d ' by H a r l a n E l l i s o n does. T h i s was the episode about an a n d r o i d , T r e n t , w h o h a d to save the e n t i r e h u m a n race, stored on a bit of fuse-wire in his h a n d , f r o m a m a r a u d i n g gang of t h i r d rate actors w e a r i n g black b a l a c l a v a helmets. It is a classic because it is the o n l y episode not f e a t u r i n g an alien w i t h a head like a m e l o n .
Since I had checked the facts with Debbie before I wrote the Editorial, I felt it only fair to allow her the right of reply -Ed.
Dear Martin H a v i n g r e a d the letters for F E L I X this week I w o u l d like to c o m m e n t f u r t h e r o n one o r t w o points: 1. T h e letter i n Broadsheet t h o u g h not p e r s o n a l l y penned was w r i t t e n u n d e r m y i n s t r u c t i o n a n d o n i n f o received f r o m me. I c e r t a i n l y h a d k n o w l e d g e o f its i n c l u s i o n in Broadsheet before Broadsheet was p r o d u c e d .
Twilight
Yours Roy Grainger
Phil N a t h a n — the true facts revealed Dear Martin W i t h reference to y o u r e d i t o r ial in last week's F E L I X c o n d e m n i n g my so-called 'hypoc r i s y ' , here are a few facts w h i c h I feel 'deserve a w i d e r a u d i e n c e ' .
Dear Sir P h i l N a t h a n is not a h y p o c r i t e as y o u c l a i m in y o u r e d i t o r i a l . D e b C o o p e r d i d not write a letter in B r o a d s h e e t c l a i m i n g P h i l e n c o u r a g e d her to a d v e r t i s e sweatshirts by p a r a d i n g herself in n o t h i n g but a sweatshirt a n d u n d e r w e a r , s o m e o n e else d i d . T h e truth is that I a n d D e b b i e b o t h d e c i d e d to m o d e l the sweatshirts (we b o t h p a r a d e d in sweatshirts and 'underwear') a n d we d i d n ' t tell P h i l till later. Y o u r e d i t o r i a l has u n w i t t i n g l y p l a y e d i n t o the hands o f those in R C S w h o w o u l d discredit P h i l N a t h a n a n d his ( a n d others in L i f e S c i ' a t t e m p t to c h a n g e R C S U to a f o r m m o r e desirable to its m e m b e r s , a n d the c r u de a n d d i r t y tactics they e m p l o y . Phil N a t h a n r e m a i n s a most respected e x - L i f e S c i D e p R e p a m o n g s t L i f e Scientists if not the rest o f the C o l l e g e , m a n y o f us find his attempts to change R C S f r o m w i t h i n l a u d a b l e a n d sincere if perhaps in v a i n .
Glass-handed
I a l w a y s preferred The Zone series.
a little bit m o r e care w i l l earn F E L I X m u c h greater respect. Yours 'hippo'-critically Philip B Nathan Biochem 3
Phil Nathan: Sexist stocking
filler?
find out that this had h appe n e d until a l t e r the event. Following your 'strong cond e m n a t i o n ' o f my h y p o c r i s y a n d y o u r a t t i t u d e t o w a r d s the m o t i o n on the J e z Q u e e n at the R C S F r e s h e r s ' U G M . I realise h o w m u c h the a b o v e will d i s a p p o i n t y o u ; but there y o u go. T h e r e c a n be n o e x c u s e f o r printing libellous statements h o w e v e r reliable the source, a n d
October 22, 1982
2. I r e p e a t t h a t P h i l h a d k n o w l e d g e o f this ' m o d e l l i n g ' o f L i f e S c i T - s h i r t s b e f o r e it o c c u r e d ( t h o u g h the idea was principally Geoffs) and Phil suggested we m i g h t like to repeat the p e r f o r m a n c e for L i f e S c i 2! Therefore, apparently condoned the idea. 3. P r i n c i p a l l y t h i s w a s n o t i n t e n d e d as a p e r s o n a l d i g at P h i l ' s p o l i t i c s , merely his i r r e s p o n s i b l e attitude by p u t t i n g f o r w a r d such a m o t i o n at the Freshers' U G M . Debbie Cooper Life Sci 2
IFELIX
News Reporting I've moaned about this before (as have editors since F E L I X was conceived) but so m u c h criticism is flying at the moment that I'd like to straighten out a few points, particularly in view of the letter from Adrian James, my news editor, which is printed opposite. News editing is probably the most difficult job on the staff of F E L I X . T o s t o p the n e w s sounding stale, almost all the research and all the writing has to be d o n e o n W e d n e s d a y afternoon (when undergraduates are next to impossible to contact), and then the sub-editing, typesetting, pasting-up and printing are all done in one mad rush on Thursday. Secondly, people often exaggerate the facts (you should have heard the R C S U version of the mascotry raid and compared it with Guilds'; I scarcely believed they were telling me about the same event!) or tell deliberate untruths. We do try our best to present the facts as they happen, but the news editor is less than omnipresent and we have to rely on oral reports from members of College who (and here's the rub) a r e p r e p a r e d to p h o n e the F E L I X Office and tell us the news. Thirdly, an enormous amount of news is 'of a sensitive nature'. In five issues of F E L I X so far produced, including two postgraduate issues, there have been four stories which I have withheld at the request of the various people involved, and a further one which perhaps I w o u l d have w i t h h e l d h a d I
EDITORIAL received enough information in time. But it isn't possible even to seek out all the people who know the facts about a story, let alone find all those likely to know some reason why it should not be printed; and, apart from this, people must take responsibility for their decisions a n d actions, and if they do or say something in public which they later regret, am I to be blamed for reporting it in a way which brings out the features of their actions which have mass appeal? The news pages are supposed to be interesting; after all. D o I need to spell out the conclusion of this outburst? We need more news staff. Anyone who has any aspirations at all in this direction, be it interviewing, researching, writing or whatever, should come and find either me or Adrian in the F E L I X Office, preferably on Fridays or M o n days to introduce yourself, or on Wednesday afternoons to work. Also, we need news. If anything o f i n t e r e s t , however" s l i g h t , happens in your l a b , y o u r lectures, your committee, your C C U or whatever, we need to hear about it. A n d finally, the responsibility for what I publish rests with me. The responsibility fo r y o u r w o r d s a n d d e e d s , reported accurately in F E L I X , rests with you.
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FELIX
We also need c o l l a t o r s . Collating consists of slipping the folded sheets of F E L I X inside one another and needs no skill whatsoever(even Stephen G o u l d e r has been k n o w n to help.) Just turn up on Thursday evening and join in the convivial social atmosphere, and help the other staff members calm the Editor as the folding machine breaks down yet again. Collating usually starts at around 7:30pm
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M A R Y F R E E M A N may be one of the most hardworking H o n o r ary Secretaries the Union has seen in recent years, but she is not, it has to be said, one of the most wildly popular. Whether it is her insistence on sticking to every m i n u t e s t tittle o f the statute book (not in itself a bad thing) or the curious stony-faced expression she wears as she quotes verbatim long extracts from Union regulations Idon't know, but nevertheless she is b e c o m i n g rather d i s l i k e d by several members of the U n i o n , and it was a close-run thing when she was ill last week and Council agreed to send her a Get W e l l S o o n c a r d by fourteen v o t e s to t w e l v e w i t h t h r e e abstentions. One of the Honorary Secretary's jobs is the allocation of
F E L I X Staff New reporting aside, we are still very short-staffed on F E L I X , and will welcome anyone who is prepared to give up some time, however i r r e g u l a r l y , to help p r o d u c e this newspaper. N o previous experience is necessary (in the case of collating it's not even desirable) as we will teach ' you all the various skills involved in graphics w o r k , l a y o u t , design, or whatever turns you on, as they say. We particularly, urgently, desperately need people to help on Thursdays between 2:30 and 5:30pm when the paper is finally put to bed, but most of the regular staff have lectures, practicals, and so forth. If anyone is even remotely interested, come to the F E L I X Office anytime today or early next week and introduce yourself.
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and goes on late, but come for as much or as little as you like. UGM Although you might not have guessed it from the appalling lack of publicity, there is an important Union General Meeting next Tuesday at 1:00pm in the Great Hall. A t this meeting, the v a r i o u s c a n d i d a t e s f o r Deputy President of the U n i o n will make their hustings speeches, so come along and find out who y o u want to administer your finances next year. IF and R C M If a n y o n e f r o m the I n s t i t u t Franpais or the Xoyal College of Music would like to act as a semi-official representative of their respective college on the staff of F E L I X (even if all they do is collect a bundle of copies every Friday,) would they please get in touch. Impossible Without Lee Paddon, Mark Smith, Nick Bedding and Nick Willson for reviews, T i m N o y c e , Peter Rodgers, Dave Rowe for pasting up and generally being helpful, H u g h Southey for What's O n , Pinocchio and WalkaboutL o o k s e e for their respective c o l u m n s , C a r o l i n e F o e r s for offering to do anything within reason (!), Adrian James f o r the news, Dave W Parry for photographs, C h r i s M a l l a b a n d f o r sport, Nick Pyne for the centre spread, M a z , Peter, and anyone I've forgotten in the rush.
Martin S Taylor
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p a r k i n g p e r m i t s , and it was brought to my attention that some malicious wit had submitted an a p p l i c a t i o n in the name o f a fictitious student; furthermore, this student had been deemed worthy of a muchcoveted permit. After a little research I managed to track down the application in question, and feel it is worth reproducing in full: T am devout muslim and I have come to college because there is mosque on the College premises. A s for this I have to stay in College in evening to pray before I go away to home. So I have to b r i n g my prayer carpet into College and it cannot go on the
train I am told this is so. M y uncle P a t r i c k who lives in Manchester pays for me and I do not get money to travel publicly. There is no money out of Iran which I can lay my handes on. But the most important reason I think is that I have a chronic sufferer. I have a disease called Bilharzia which attacks. So I have to get to College quickly. I was lucky to get from Tehran and if I cannot stay at College I may be sent home so I pray to the holy Imam and Allah my Light and Savioiur that you will grant this simple wish. M a y the holy Allah be blessing you with many children.' F U N N Y H O W the p r a c t i c a l jokers, the rumour-spreaders, the gossip columnists of this w o r l d f i n d it so difficult to swallow a taste of their own medicine. In last week's column
I October 22,1982
I r e l a t e d s e v e r a l less t h a n complimentary tales concerning ex-Editor Steve Marshall. This week I found him supposedly working in the F E L I X Office on his own. Being naturally curious, and wondering what had induced him to lend his talents so generously, I took a look at the page he was working on, and discovered, to no great surprise, that he h a d been s w i t c h i n g r o u n d the signatures o n the Letters to the Editor. IT H A S almost become traditional to criticise Victor Mooney in this newspaper; how refreshing,' then, that his first mention in this column is to commend him for his humility last Saturday when, in the absence o f three of his staff, he tied an apron round his ample girth and spent most of the afternoon washing up.
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REVIEWS Feast of Terror Danton's Death by Georg Biichner, in a version by Howard Brenton. Directed by Peter GUI, the Olivier, National Theatre. T h e t u m u l t u o u s events o c c u r r i n g in revolutionary F r a n c e in the year 1794 provide the setting for B u c h n e r ' s Danton's Death. T h e period of ' T h e T e r r o r ' , when the guillotine s e l d o m s t o o d idle, p r o v i d e s a very fertile g r o u n d for B u c h n e r ' s penetrating observation of two opposing forces of man. T h e two central characters are D a n t o n ( p l a y e d by B r i a n C o x ) a n d R o b e s p i e r r e (excellently portrayed by T o m G e o r g e s o n k as a very sinister character). D a n t o n is a one-time national hero w h o stands for freedom a n d sensuality, but whose passivity against the sweeping tide of the revolution hastens his death at the hands of Robespierre. T h e latter personality, who led the revolution at the time, r e p r e s e n t s virtue a n d s o c i a l o r d e r . B u t a knowledge of the F r e n c h Revolution is not r e q u i r e d to a p p r e c i a t e B u c h n e r ' s s u p e r b analysis of two opposing ideologies, attitudes to life and personalities. T h e work is profound and cooly analytic, turning over all kinds of philosophical stones, but the epic d r a m a an almost scientific objectivity. The play r e p r e s e n t s quite an i n t e l l e c t u a l feast, but above all the National Theatre production is very successful at sowing the seed of doubt. O n e finds oneself q u e s t i o n i n g d e a r l y h e l d beliefs, a n d in this respect the play is one of the most disturbing one is likely to come across in
WALKABOUTLOOKS EC
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Getting T h e r e T h i s w e e k ' s o u t i n g i n v o l v e s a bit m o r e walkabout than the last one: the Tate G a l l e r y , Millbank. In true British style, as y o u emerge from the tube station there are several wellmeaning signposts to the Tate, but the area is currently full of r o a d w o r k s a n d after a couple of h u n d r e d yeards the useful signposts are r e p l a c e d by bright yellow ones s a y i n g ' D i v e r t e d T r a f f i c ' . . . n o m e n t i o n of the whereabouts of the Gallery. S o I've drawn a s k e t c h m a p ; it's about a three minute walk. . T h e Tate houses a British C o l l e c t i o n of w o r k s from the sixteenth century to a r o u n d 1900 and the National C o l l e c t i o n of M o d e r n A r t : this consists of w o r k s by British artists b o r n after 1850, a n d of foreign w o r k s from the Impressionists onwards. T h e G a l l e r y also organises temporary exhibitions, both major ones and smaller displays. I went along this week to see two of the small exhibitons. Howard Hodgkin's Indian Leaves These were made by H o w a r d H o d g k i n whilst he was staying in A h m e d a b a d in N o v e m b e r 1978. Every day he received leaves of specially handmade paper, still wet from the factory, on which he painted before they dried. T h e paints used were the traditional vegetable dyes used to coloukr Indian textiles: he asked for a M u g h a l red, Indian o c h r e , as many different greens as possible a n d so on. H i s 'Indian Leaves' have a tropical richness and intensity of colour that convey most vividly the hot, steamy-jungle atmosphere a n d the dust and brightness of smarkets a n d fruits. E a c h image is painted in two versions: they Poge6|
L o n d o n at the present time. T h e play is all the more remarkable in that it was written in 1835 when the author was a m e r e t w e n t y - o n e - y e a r s - o l d . B u c h n e r is perhaps more famous for his Woyzeck, but Danton's Death shows not traces of its being hastily written, c o m p o s e d as it was under great pressure in less than five weeks (while he was under close police surveillance for his political activities). M a n y of the cast have c o m e straight from the production of The Prince of Homburg by v o n Kleist at the Cottesloe Theatre. B u c h n e r and v o n Kleist show remarkable similarities; bot h had a scientific training, both wrote their w o r k s when they were very young, and both their style sare analytic and objective but intensely dramatic. F o r those of you who ahve seen The Prince (it is now finished), Danton's Death makes an interesting comparison. N i c k Bedding picn/wiu ACCEPT^ •Wt MARKET fftCfc 7 r
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House of Wax Certificate AA, starring Vincent Price, Phyllis Kirk, now showing exclusively at ABC Fulham Road. Following the unexpected success of Comin at Ya (a rather poor Western) in A m e r i c a , there has been a recent revival in 3-D films. N o t only are Jaws 3 a n d possibly Halloween 3 being filmed in the process, but also Friday the 13th, part 3 w h i c h has already opened in America. O n the tail of the surge W a r n e r s have wisely decided to revive the earliest and perhaps best k n o w n 3 - D f i l m House of Wax ( w h i c h catapulted Vincent Price to stardom in 1953). Filmed in 'Natural V i s i o n ' and ' W a r n e r C o l o r ' it is a beautiful and strangely atmospheric horror film, which contains a few genuine s h o c k s and uses the process fairly effectively. Vincent Price (in a part he has constantly reprised during his career) plays H e n r y J a r r o d , a brilliant wax sculptor who idolises his artistic creations and resists his partner's attempts to s t a r t a C h a m b e r of H o r r o r s . W h e n s a i d partner burns down their unsuccessful business for the insurance J a r r o d disappears and is presumed to be dead. T h e scene is set A sample from Further Down on Maggie's Farm by Steve Bell (Penguin ÂŁ2.95). These two frames are from the A d v e n t u r e s of L o r d G o d Almighty, who joins Steve's other victims (the government, Freddie L a k e r , the S D P , etc, etc) in another of his very funny cartoon books.
are hung as pairs. Variations are due to the state of drying of the paper and the fact that paper dried so rapidly in the heat of India, decisions about composition and colouring had to be taken almost instantly and there was no time for reinterpretation between the two versions. A n o t h e r effect of w o r k i n g with wet paper is that the dyes actually penetrate the paper. T h e y do not all mix equally well, giving outlines either sharp or fuzzy and a surface finish w h i c h shines like lacquer or is softly matt. It's a fascinating process and the end product is most evocative in India.
necessary to define a w o r k of art? T h i s is the question answered by Sol L e W i t t ' s 'Lines in F o u r Directions' and by the series of distorted squares within circles of Robert M a n g o l d : his is a f a s c i n a t i n g e x p e r i m e n t in s e e i n g v e r s u s perceiving. O t h e r w o r k s c o n c e r n not p e r c e p t u a l abstraction but images grown from figures and identifiable objects. E d u a r d o Paolozz'i's H e a d s are delimited by struts and scaffolding. Their internal workings are those of robots or space stations and bear no relation to a dissection class. A n d some w o r k s are just plain witty. In ' F a r m A n i m a l s ' , M a r c e l Broodthaers has given county-show-specimens of cattle the names of B M W , M e r c e d e s , etc! A tongue-in-cheek manipulation of the literal meaning we attach to brand images created in glossy ads. This little exhibition will appeal to anyone with a visual sense of humour. Where, when ÂŁ? B o t h e x h i b i t i o n s are at the T a t e G a l l e r y , Millbank, open M o n - S a t 10:00am-5:50pm, S u n 2:00-5:50pm. H o w a r d Hodgkin's Indian Leaves until N o v 7. Prints and W o r k s on Paper until N o v 21. B o t h are free.
Prints in Gallery 61 T h e fifty-five p r i n t s a n d w o r k s o n p a p e r showing in Gallery 61 were mostly acquired by the Tate in the last two years. T h e w o r d ' p r i n t ' is a m u d d l i n g o n e embracing anything from the pattern on a piece of cloth, to the cheap copy of a V a n G o g h painting. In this context it applies to the g r a p h i c p r o c e s s e s of l i t h o g r a p h y , r e l i e f - , intaglio-, a n d s c r e e n - p r i n t i n g . R a t h e r t h a n painting directly o n canvas or paper, the artist first makes a 'tool' and then uses it to produce an 'edition' of identical impressions. Seventeen different artists are represented, and as many different approaches to 'art'. W h a t is the most minimal visual information | O c t o b e r 2 2 , |
'Mango' (1978), one of a pair from 'Indian Leaves'.
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for his revenge and finally his grisly end. The story (a cheeky rework of Phantom at the Opera) stands up well as a period piece and is hugely enjoyable as such. Price's tones are suitably Shakespearian and Phyllis K i r k scurries away from the mysterious figure in black with commendable haste, but melodrama occasionally degenerates into farce. O n the whole the film is a remarkable achievement— even more so considering that the director was blind in one eye and could never appreciate the 3-D process itself. This process is used well (especially w h e n a streetcaller advertising the w a x w o r k s bats elasticated balls into the audience) and is more effective than later efforts s u c h as Parasite or Dynasty. A s it is filmed in 'color' (sorry!) it also beats other 3-D favourites like It Came From Outer Space. If you've never seen a 3-D film, then this is the one to try. But a w o r d of advice. T h e exclusive presentation at A B C F u l h a m R o a d means that seats tend to sell quickly, so b o o k in advance (especially at weekends). Mark Smith
Deathtrap, featuring Michael Caine and Christopher Reeve. W h e n Ira Levin's stage play Deathtrap was first produced in the West E n d it was widely criticised as a blatant attempt to write another Sleuth: an ingenious thriller with two acts, one set, a n d five characters. T h e accusation could never be denied, but this was no reason to r e j e c t the p l a y as w o r t h l e s s , a n d its subsequent record-breaking r u n proved this. T h e film version demonstrates another facet of Levin's play which it shares with Sleuth: it doesn't work too well on the big screen. There are several reasons for this. Primarily, one of the main features of the plot is that Sidney B r u h l (Michael Caine) is a playwright w o r k i n g o n a play called D e a t h t r a p , w h i c h is in two acts, one set, five characters, etc, and as the story unfolds it becomes clear that the play he is writing (within the play) is not only based on a murder which has taken place in his o w n house (ie the play B r u h l is writing is based on Bruhl's experiences) but at a different 'metalevel' he is writing the Ira Levin play Deathtrap i n w h i c h he is o n l y o n e of t h e f i c t i t i o u s characters. Confused? Y o u won't be in the film, because this element is partly missing. C o u l d n ' t it have been rewritten to make Bruhl a film director? A s I mentioned, Deathtrap is a one set play, and so when it is staged, every part of Sidney Bruhl's living r o o m is continuously on view, and so the audience becomes obsessed with Bruhl's impressively displayed collection of weaponry, and when characters in turn reach for gun or knife or whatever, there is a definite thrill as you realise ' M y G o d , he's actually going to use that thing.' In the film we are only given occasional glimpses of the weapons (since the c a m e r a is naturally focussed o n the acto'rs for most of the time) and so the effect is considerably weakened. M y final criticism is that the big surprises don't w o r k , notably one very dramatic entrance w h i c h is one of the most effective s h o c ks I have experienced in the theatre; in the cinema it just isn't possible to startle an audience in the same way merely by the entrance of one character; cinema audiences are used to so m u c h more. O n the credit side, special effects make murder rather more effective than on stage the director has taken the opportunity to wri ( in a chase ar o u nd the home, and rhi ra weak original ending has been completely rewritten to allow one final twist Wnn c >uld never be effectively portrayed on siuge. M o r e than this cannot '•„. - • d without revealing FELIX
• • • • • • • • B H H H I B B 9 I
All it takes is a twist: Michael Caine explains Reeve how to escape from Houdini's handcuffs. details of the plot! C o n c l u s i o n ? Despite the film's weaknesses, the strength of the plot holds up, and it is w o r t h a visit if y o u missed the play. If, like me, y o u saw the play, you'll k n o w just what's c o m i n g and will find the film something of a letdown. Martin S Taylor
Plague of Graffitti Plague Dogs; Fast Times Ever since Lassie and Rin-Tin-Tin, man's best friend has often been made the heroic subject of a film, but rarely so poignantly as in Plague Dogs, w h i c h has just opened at the O d e o n H a y m a r k e t . R i c h a r d A d a m s has recently fallen out with the powers that be at the R S P C A , and resigned as President because the hierarchy weren't prepared to put a few noses out of joint over animal research. This latest adaptation of one of his b o o k s firmly puts his case. A n y o n e w h o s a w Watership Down w i l l recognise the animation style; Richard A d a m s has brought together the same team once again, and the result is a very polished style of animation, with the bonus of an all-star cast including J o h n Hurt and James Bolam providing the voices and the perennial P e r c y Edwards for the s o u n d effects; and we are s p a r e d A r t G a r f u n k e l w a r b l i n g on the soundtrack. O u r canine heroes escape from trie mental a n d p h y s i c a l t o r t u r e of t h e r e s e a r c h establishment and quickly have to c o m e to terms with life in the wild, living off livestock, attracting the unfriendly attention of the local farmers, until a r u m o u r circulates that the dogs may be infected with bubonic plague, which was the subject of a top secret M o D project at the lab. A likeable, affectionate, if rather downbeat film, w h i c h I'm sure' will be enjoyed by those who liked Watership Down, so when your unspeakable ten-year-old cousins are d u m p e d on you this C h r i s t m a s , there are many worse ways to keep them quiet for an afternoon. I'd like to think that it would stimulate public debate into animal research and vivisection, but !': is almost too nice for this crusading tag. M y other f i l m s theme isn't cruelty, unless it's cruelty to the reviewer. If it wasn't for the jolly nice seats in the review cinema and a misplaced sense of duty to you, dear reader, H H H B H O c t o b e r 2 2 , 1982
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I'd have joined the rush for the door during A m y Heckerling's Fast Times w h i c h has just opened at the Plaza, Leicester Square. There have been innumerable attempts by the cinema industry to reproduce the success of American Graffitti but all have failed for various reasons. This latest offering is an adaptation of a book by C a m e r o n C r o w e who claims to have attempted a piece of serious sociological research into the m o d e r n teenage culture by going back to high school 'under cover' to observe his subject in its natural habitat (I wonder if anyone spotted him). W h a t emerges is the usual self-indulgent 'boy did y o u ever miss out' view of adolescence. 'The K i d s ' are precocious, promiscuous, a n d provocative while at the same time vulnerable and misunderstood. A r e all A m e r i c a n kids like that? If so I'm glad I spent my formative years this side of the Atlantic. W h e r e the film fails in c o m p a r i s o n with • American Graffitti is that the characters are too thin; it fails to concentrate on a small group of people, trying instead to explain the many motivations and fantasies of its stereotypes as it ridicules a n d dissects them. T h e w a r m t h and sympathy which w o r k e d so well in Graffitti is s o m e h o w missing here and the soundtrack is a rather m i x e d b u n c h of instantly forgettable A m e r i c a n rock tunes rather than driving rhythms. 1
The X certificate this film has attracted because of the amount of time devoted to the examination of Jennifer J a s o n Leigh's rather non-descript figure, must somewhat lessen its appeal, since it excludes those most likely to identify with the central characters. B u t , those of you who enjoyed Porkys will probcibly lap it up. L e e Paddon
IICU COUNCILI F E L I X proudly presents the:
Bluffers Guide to IC Union To the uninitiated, the Union may appear to be nothing more than a meeting place for hacks, a chance for self-glorification for a few pompous individuals. The truth is somewhat different: much of the work of the Union is concerned with the day-to-day administration of all the clubs and societies and such 'hidden extras' as academic and social welfare. Since there is often considerable misunderstanding or just plain bewilderment about the various committees, Nick Pyne has set out a brief account of how they function, their membership,'their responsibilities, and some of their failings.
The Executive
The Executive
7
2*
ICU DEPUTY PRESIDENT
STEPHEN GOULDER ICU PRESIDENT
Y N ICU H O N Y
Union General Meetings
Because of size (not to mention the incredible tedium and frequent inquoracy!), neither the Union Council, nor the U G M or available to formulate Union policy on every point that may arise in the normal running of IC Union. This task is fulfilled (to a greater or lesser extent) by the U n i o n Executive C o m m i t t e e . T h i s committee, consisting of the sabbatical officers (not the F E L I X editor) and the Constiuent College Union Presidents meets roughly weekly (or was it weakly?) to decide on such points, but when necessary individual members of the Executive will make decisions without consultation. A l l members of the Executive are responsible to Union Council and the U G M on matters concerning IC Union (though many C C U matters are dealt with internally). 1
NIGEL & ''S SCHOOL OF MINES UNION PRESIDENT
!L SCHMIDT "#$%L COLLEGE OF
STEPHEN BISHOP CITY D GUILDS UNION PRESIDENT
"#$%L
SCIENCE UNION PRESIDENT
Union Finance Committee
Major Subcommittees
This is the sovereign body of the Union, and can dictate policy to any Union committee. U G M s are infrequent, and usually bogged down in proceedure, so a smaller body exists to fulfil this function in mundane matters— the Union Council,
Union Council IC Union Council, ' which consists of the people whose mug shots you see here, has a similar raison d'etre to U G M s . The idea is to h a v e r e p r e s e n t a t i v e s o f the v a r i o u s viewpoints likely to be prevalent in College so that a reasonable discussion of any points of relevance to the Union in general can take place, and not simply be decided by the executive. 1
This is independent of Council, and holds the purse strings for the Union. Its members are elected by a U G M specifically to sit on this committee which allocates grants each year to the various subcommittees a n d
) * + ( W T O N K S B ( , N
MIKE PUB
PROSSER
-. D ( , N
Societies Debating Drama Jazz Opera Film
IC Radio STOIC FELIX The Phoenix Handbook Music
Choir
Council is supposed to meet regularly two or three times a term to monitor some of the t h i n g s t o o m u n d a n e to be brought to a U G M , as well as to fill gaps in policy until further policy can be formed at a U G M . In practice, Council suffers from much the same maladies as does the U G M — p r o c e d u r a l wrangles abound and towards the end of the year Council is rarely quorate. The situation is aggravated by the fact that most people know the others present, and there are usually few there who are totally sober, so meeti n g s t e n d to d r a g o n u n t i l boredom or inquoracy (or just JIM B O U C H E R ICU A C A D E M I C o c c a s i o n a l l y there being no AFFAIRS O F F I C E R further business) terminates the
Alternative Orchestra
Prospectus
/012340 SCC
N
MILLER
( , N
56 , N BULL C ( , N
COLIN BUTTUR RCC ( , N
Societies
Clubs
Clubs
SDP H G Wells UN Soc S F Soc Ami-Apartheid PATA FFF Amnesty ICNAC Vegsoc CND Pimlico Connection Catholic WIST Polish Industrial Islam Socialist Christian Labour Jewish Conservative ChaplaincyLiberal Methodist
Bowling Badminton Volleyball Squash Karate Tennis Wing Chun Table Tennis Sailing Football Yacht HockeyBoat Swimming & Water Polo Angling Cricket Boardsailing RugbyCross Country- Judo Ski Fencing Cycling Rifle Sporting Motorcycle
Riding Chess Graffltti
OSC
( , N
Societies
Micro Model Aircraft Gliding Bridge Real Ale Audio Canoe Photographic Astrosoc
Hamsoc Billiards Mountaineering Scout and Guide Caving Surf Balloon Dancing Youth Hostelling Hang Gliding War Games
78 W ( 99 D SILWOOD 9 K COMM ( , N
Pakistan Afro-Caribbean India Chinese Cypriot Hellenic Iranian Latin American
Dr Ken Weale ICU Hon Senior Treasurer
C C U s . It also considers extra claims for funds throughout the year, and generally monitors the state of the Union's finances.
Subcommittees
Other Subcommittees
SIMON RODAN E X T E R N A L AFFAIRS OFFICER
J O N BARNETT WELFARE OFFICER
JOHN FERGUSON RAG C H A I R M A N
J O H N PASSMORE POSTGRADUATE AFFAIRS O F F I C E R
These are generally classified into ' M a j o r S u b - C o m m i t t e e s ' and ' O t h e r S u b - C o m m i t t e e s ' . The d i s t i n c t i o n seems to be based mainly on f i n a n c i a l g r o u n d s — the m a j o r s u b committees spending most of the money—than on any qualitative d e c i s i o n as to t h e i r r e l a t i v e importance.
KEN Y O U N G ICCAG CHAIRMAN
meeting.
BYLL WATERSON ENTERTAINMENTS OFFICER
NICK H I L L PWP C H A I R M A N
Each subcommittee is headed by a chairman (or officer for Welfare, External Affairs and Academic Affairs) who repre sents the views of the committee to Council.
Old Students' Representatives FRED CANN RCSA R E P
BRIAN S H I N D L E R C&GU AAO
Poge8]
HAZEL CHEESBROUGH RCSU AAO
JAMES DEVLIN RSMU AAO
K E N WILKINSON O L D CENTRALIANS REPRESENTATIVE
PETE LEWIS RSMA REP
| October 22,1982|
|Poge9
LICU COUNCILI Bluffers Guide continued Major Sub-Committees Athletics Clubs Committee ( A C C ) is concerned with the a d m i n i s t r a t i o n o f the sports clubs, dealing with individual club's monetary allocations and f o r m i n g a source of positive feedback on the sports needs within College. Social Clubs Committee ( S C C ) has a similar function to A C C , d e a l i n g mostly with religious and political societies, although it encompasses other societies which are 'social' rather than 'active' in aim. Recreational Clubs Committee ( R C C ) is again a similar idea, although dealing mostly with 'games and hobbies' clubs. Often the distinction between S C C and R C C clubs is difficult to see! Overseas Students Committee ( O S C ) is not only concerned with the running of the overseas s t u d e n t s ' s o c i e t i e s , but a l s o provides a platform for making the views of the Union known about such matters as overseas students fees, etc. Social, Cultural and Amusements Board ( S C A B ) deals with anything that .could come under the heading of 'performing arts'. It continas the Music Society which is an umbrella for the Orchestra and the Choir.
man's Lunches) and a forum for the d i s c u s s i o n o f p r o b l e m s which refer explicitly to P G s — timing of PhDs, grants, etc. External Affairs deals with the interaction between the Union and outside bodies, principally U L U and other London colleges, the N U S (yes, we do still talk to them sometimes) and so on. Entertainments Committee (Ents) is responsible for catering for the entertainment o f Joe student. Less of a committee and more of a clique, and to some extent if your likes and theirs don't coincide, then tough! Rag Committee co-ordinates the activities of C C U Rag as well as deciding on the charities for the year a n d ( o c c a s i o n a l l y ) o r g a n i s i n g stunts. It is responsible for the p a p e r w o r k : p r o d u c i n g a c c o u n t s , getting . l i c e n c e s , e t c , w h i c h it has miserably failed to do in the past few years! Permanent W o r k i n g Party (PWP) is a kind of a Union t h i n k - t a n k . T h e six (or less) m e m b e r s get t o g e t h e r a n d brainstorm the boring things noone else can be bothered to discuss. May be mandated (or s o m e t i m e s chose o f its o w n a c c o r d to stick its nose into anything that happens at College (or outside), and to deliver its considered opinion to Council.
P u b l i c a t i o n s B o a r d (Pub B o a r d ) is p e r h a p s s l i g h t l y misnamed, since it is concerned with not just publications, but w i t h a l l the student m e d i a , including IC Radio and S T O I C as well as the publications side (FELIX, The Phoenix, etc). It s h o u l d , o f course, p r o v i d e a regulatory influence on publications, but there seems precious little evidence of this! Silwood Park Committee. Silwood Park is the College's field station near A s c o t , a n d this committee is intended to represent the views of the students there to the bulk of the students at Imperial, as well as covering just about all the functions of the Union at the Silwood Park Site. Other Subcommittees A c a d e m i c A f f a i r s tries to attain/maintain a high standard of lecturing and practical work throughout the departments at College, as well as providing a campaign platform for opposition to cuts, etc. Welfare is c o n c e r n e d with provisions within College of 'welfare facilities': Health Centre, Student Services, etc. Postgraduate Affairs forms the basis for social interaction of postgraduates (eg P G Plough-, Page 10 I H B I H B f f i H B f f l H H B
Refectories Committee. Student Residence Committee, and so on. These are all part of College a d m i n i s t r a t i o n a n d , although the Union has representatives on all of these, they are not directly under Union control. D e p a r t m e n t a l Representatives Not the most keen and active members of Union Council. Dep Reps have few responsibilities outside their C C U s . There is at present a move underway to remove them from Council. So that's it. If complain, you now at least to whom done. I hope this mechanics of the
O t h e r Important Independent Union Committees House Committee allocates money to be spent to make the Union less of a tip. It is responsible for such monstrosities as the U n i o n L o w e r L o u n g e partition (an ill-fated monolith of less than a year's duration), the new Union Lower Lounge and so o n . C o n s i d e r i n g how much money they spend, it's amazing that there's never any difference!
Safety Committee Notable by its absence. Under the Health and Safety at Work Act, the Union has a legal obligation to have one of these. Ooops, what a slip! Other Committees Y o u may hear about such other committees as Bar Committee,
Pictured from left lo right the Dep Reps are: Top Row: Mines Res Eng Gaynor Lewis: Elec Eng Gordon Bowser. Bouser. Middle row: Met & Mat Sci Charlotte Soulhall: Mech Eng Raphael Tory: Aero Philip Adey: Chem Eng Andrew McAuslan. Bottom row: Maths Fiona Whitelaw: Physics David Parry; Chem Ged O'Shea; Life Sci Peter Burl.
,
you wish to know how, or it should be has made the Union a little
Percival Sydney, cool sedate Poet presumptive, tool of fate, Seeking as ever, ideas new, D e c i d e d to stroll through a nearby zoo. Laurie the lion, resting, still, Dreaming of days of chase and kill, Just one more rend, just one more splurge, Savage, relentless, ancient urge. A careless keeper, an opening prised, A n d two ambitions were realised, F o r Percival Sydney, cool sedate Became the Poet Laurie-ate.
Internal Services deals with things l i k e S o u t h s i d e S h o p , Bookshop, Games Machines, Haldane Library, Refectories, etc. Rarely quorate and a real pain at times this committee has the potential to really get things done. A pity really! Transport Committee deals with the failing health of the four U n i o n vans a n d p e r p e t u a l l y moans that we can't afford new ones. Suffers particularly from the recession!
more understandable, and that you might now choose to play a part!
Geoffrey Reeves
The poem above was published in last year's edition of The Phoenix, the magazine of IC Union. DO CAN
Y O U H A V E ARTISTIC OR L I T E R A R Y URGES? Y O U C O N T R I B U T E IN A N Y O F T H E S E A R E A S ? photographs - short stories - articles - poems drawings - sketches - anecdotes
IF SO Please
[October 22, 19821
WE'D LIKE TO HEAR send your contributions
FROM to the
YOU Felix
NOW! Office
I FELIX I
ICLUBS & SOCIETIESI Science Fiction N o w that you've all seen Blade Runner I c a n reveal that ten s e c o n d s — a n d what is more outrageous—the most vital ten seconds of the whole film were missing. Perhaps one of the gravest flaws in the film (apart from the voice over) was the. ending. Originally, before the sponsors shreaded the celluloid, threw it in the air and stuck it back together again in the name of commerciality, the film ended with D e c k a r d a n d the girl replicant getting into the lift, after D e c k a r d had found the little paper unicorn on the floor outside his flat. T h e significance of the unicorn is lost until one discovers that the missing ten s e c o n d s s h o w e d D e c k a r d d r e a m i n g of a u n i c o r n in the landscape seen at the e n d, just after his encounter with L e o n . T h e doubts (if you had them) about D e c k a r d ' s identity are confirmed and the ending, to my m i n d , is m u c h more satisfying. Miranda F Smith the Anti-clone
Gliding Club G l a d t o see a g o o d t u r n o u t at the t w o meetings we've had so far this term. Even more pleasing is that a large proportion of those present made the journey to the airfield (Lasham nr Basingstoke) for that first taste of this e x h i l a r a t i n g s p o r t : the air e x p e r i e n c e flight. If y o u are not included in the above category and y o u want to learn to fly, then c o m e and find out about the Gliding C l u b . W e meet every T h u r s d a y at 5:30pm in A e r o 254. P S : Congratulations to S u e , our first solo pilot of the term.
Film Society A r e y o u interested in film? W h y not join F i l m Society then; membership (includes all films this term) is only £2.00. If y o u don't fancy joining, why not come along just to see a programme or two, membership for the night will vary from 70p to 25p. This week we are showing a film called The Flicker, made in 1966; here are some reviews: "The ultimate to date in the non-objective film..Jt has only black and white frames...the resulting strobe effect can...cause the illusion of colour, of a spreading of light. Seeing the Flicker will cause one in every fifteen thousand to have an epileptic seizure." — S h e l d o n R e n a n , An Introduction to the American Underground Film sort of visual LSD, including "...a hallucinations...Some of these cats were sitting stewing...as if watching Beethoven himself play the 5th Piano Concerto." -The Evening Star, Washington P S : If anyone is interested in making film c o m e along a n d tell m e — w e may be able to get a grant from the U n i o n if enough people are interested.
Jewish Society I C J e w i s h Society plans to host a series of 'very informal' Friday night meals; grace before and after meals will be recited and whenever possible there will be a guest s p e a k e r to encourage discussion during the meal. T h e first of these meals will be held T o d a y , O c t o b e r 22 (see W h a t ' s O n for details). If interested please bring, if at all possible, about £1 w o r t h
of dairy or vegetarian kosher food to Beit A r c h at 6:00pm, from there we shall go to a nearby, r o o m for the meal. A l l the food will be put together o n the table so that, with luck there will be a large variety of foods to eat. T h e lively, v i v a c i o u s a n d a t t r a c t i v e D a n n i e l l a , whohappens to be a student R e f o r m R a b b i as well, will be joining us tonight.
Audio Society How many r e c o r d s did you buy last y e a r ? If the answer is one or more, then reading this article c o u l d save y o u m o n e y ! T h e fact is that r e c o r d s are o v e r p r i c e d — p a r t i c u l a r l y in L o n d o n where although the big names offer attractive prices o n T o p 60 albums they make all their profits on non-chart albums. N O M O R E , the A u d i o Society is p r o u d to offer t h r o u g h its n e w r e c o r d c l u b , A L L currently available albums at the cheapest prices possible. See below and calculate how m u c h y o u c a n save. M e m b e r s h i p is only £1.60, so c o m e along to the U p p e r U n i o n L o u n g e (next to the U n i o n Office) on T u e s d a y O c t o b e r 26 at 1:00pm. Join us, order records and save money. T y p i c a l Prices (Single Albums) Arista, Charisma, Chrysalis Decca, Phonogram, Polydor "£3.60 A & M , C B S , M C A , Pye, Virgin, W E A £3.80 E M I , U n i t e d Artist, Island £3.85 RCA . £3.95 Independents £2.35 to £3.60 Audio Society Record Club-too good to miss!
& o p a l i§>tf)ool of fflmt$
present
Paint Your Face Discotheque Saturday Imperia I
23 October College
Tickets iTOO
830
till late at
JCR for painted faces all others X.1 40
Tickets available from ICU & C C U offices and at the door
Bookshop News
New Titles Good food fromk Farthinghoe - Nicola. Cox, Gollancz £8.50 Bosh & Nonsense - Edward Lear, Allen Lane £5.95 || I have been tolerant, polite, even humorous. It Space Time & Medicine - Dossey, Shambhala obviously doesn't have any effect on the small Pub £5.95 number of people who think that because the Nicholas Nickleby - Dickens, O U P £1.95 Bookshop is owned by the student union, they My Sweet Audrina - Andrews, Fontana £3.95 can just walk in and help themselves. George Orwell, A Life - Crick, Penguin £2.95 If we catch anyone taking Bookshop stock Experiences of an Irish RM - Sommerville & without paying, we will have no alternative but Ross, Dent £2.95 to call the police. Card Games - Roberts, Foulsham £1.95 It is because of the past history pilfering Wedding Speeches & Toasts - Jeffery, Foul within the College, that we have had to sham £1.00 unfortunately install Entry and Exit turnstiles, High Pressure - Cooper & Davidson, Fontana a security guard, goods must be put in bags, £1.95 receipts must be given. I don't like any of it but, The Hidden World - Leonard Cheshire, Fount as trie media says, it's a sign of the times. If £1.75 a n y o n e sees p e o p l e s t e a l i n g f r o m the Spray It Loud - Sosener, RKP £2.95 Bookshop, tell me. If they steal from us, they History of Persian Earthquake - Ambraseys & could steal from you. Melville, C U P £35.00.
I
Dramsoc
Next Wednesday (see What's On) at 2:00pm we shall be starting weekly workshops. These s h o u l d be a lot of f u n , c o n s i s t i n g of improvisation, acting, games, projection training, make-up classes, etc. The first will be in the Concert Hall, but all of
Cricket Tour B r i l l i a n t t o u r ! F i v e games played, one was — the rest were either...lost or drawn. N o great cricket but John Wints scored two 50s and Jimmy Hutton did the bowling honours including a hat-trick. ( G o d knows how with his slow left-hand crap!) First fixture cancelled due to rain, drove directly to Torquay on the last Tuesday of term. Presence was felt—booted out of 'The Musicians Bar', picked up by.the police when we proved very difficult to remove from a 'night c l u b ' especially when Phil E a s t l a n d was a d a m a n t o n finishing the pint that he had bought. Between arriving and S u n d a y night J i m m y H u t t o n and Chris Thomason downed the fifty pint mark. A couple of others requiring a little longer. One night after the boys had been on the beer—it was the general consensus is that Garath F i s h s h o u l d have a h a i r c u t .
the rest will be held in the Upper Lounge. Everyone is welcome to come along, even Oliviers need practice! T h o s e of you more interested in the technical side of stagecraft should also come along to the Storeroom on Wednesdays to help build sets for our forthcoming productions. Chris
Using nail scissors half of his hair was removed—thanks to being locked out o f G a r a t h ' s room the job was left incomplete. Neil Clarke was the unfortunate subject of a classic comment which was passed as he strode in to bat against P l y m s t o c k : " C o r ! Don't they grow worms big in L o n d o n ! "
Rifle & Pistol Despite a large turnout during the first two weeks of term, good shots are still required for both i n t e r n a l a n d inter-university teams. New features this year include a club knockout competition, ladies league and numerous shoulder-to-shouldert duels (Time Higgs' organisation permitting). Some high scores have already been registered this term with T i m Higgs shooting a magnificent '96' despite a poor start to the season. (He said "It would have been a '100', but Steve Harrison was talking to me!"). T o p o t en t i a l markspersons
Cycling Do you ride a bicycle or have you a bike which you would like to ride? Ever wanted to do more than ride it to College, or just make your ride to College a little more comfortable? If it's yes to any of the above you should consider joining the newly formed IC Cycle Club. The main activities relating to actual riding are weekly runs for those who want just to cycle for pleasure, race training and racing itself for those who want to cycle for pain. The weekly Sunday runs are already happening, the others will follow when we get more organised. Other plans include longer trips, say for weekends, with this possibly including c r o s s - C h a n n e l e x c u r s i o n s (when better weather arrives). The other main function of the club is to provide members with the abilitiy to maintain and improve their machines. T o this end we are already in the process of obtaining over £300 worth of tools. This will allow members to do anything from tightening loose nuts and replacing broken spokes to building wheels Hopefully the club will also soon be able to acquire track bikes, essential for the racing side of the club. If you are interested, drop a note to our esteemed Captain, Ronan McDonald (Maths 3) or come along to our regular Sunday ride (Beit Arch at 10:00am). Ric Jones (Vice Captain)
who may have been put off by the crowds in the range, please make the effort to come along. ' E x p e r t ' t u i t i o n is a l w a y s available. Members are invited to attend the open pistol competition and c l u b d i n n e r , to be h e l d o n December 1. Don't worry if you c a n ' t s h o o t , Steve H a r r i s o n (Club Captain, contact via Elec E n g letter-racks) c o u l d only manage 4 out of 100 at his last attempt. There will also be a club social division pub visit on Wednesday October 27 (next week) see range officers for details.
Squash The club already anticipates a very successful year following an astonishing turnout at Freshers' Fair, both in terms of potential membership and depth of new talent. A t the league's A G M last week this prompted us to enter an IC V team into the newly formed U L U S L 6th Division, thus hopefully enabling more players to compete in matches during their time at IC. Partly commensurate with this, but also due to other considerations the club is actively seeking ways of increasing its share of the total court time available at the Sports Centre. T h e first matches o f this
season were played this week; first r e s u l t — b e l o w s t r e n g t h ladies team lost n a r r o w l y to Bedford College 3-2. The men's and ladies' ladders are being established and will be put up after the weekend; see noticeboard at Sports Centre for details.
Cross Country The club had a very promising start to the season competing in the Southern Universities Cross C o u n t r y League on the first Saturday of term. Running for London Univ, we finished fifth out of twenty-two teams (four of the six s c o r i n g runners were from IC), with newcomer Andrew Griffiths finishing a creditable f o r t i e t h despite r u n n i n g the muddy six mile course in training flats. In the ladies race Mandy T i n d a l l s h o w e d that e a r l y morning training pays dividends by finishing second to take the London side into sixth position. Not bad for a 1-member team. Last Saturday on a very wet H a m p s t e a d H e a t h the c l u b fielded two teams in the University College Relays. G r a h a m Harker and Hugh Dixon got the first team off to a good start but it took a fast last leg run by Jon Lea to bring us into the top ten, giving it plenty of time to get back for the all-important cross country tea.
ISPORT
^
Hockey Firsts I C vs U C L 7-0
A rainy d a y . but a p r o m i s i n g start for the first eleven in their first game o f the season. W i t h f o u r new players in the side, I m p e r i a l began the game eager to s h o w the f o r m that has w o n us the C o l l e g e league for the past few years. After a tentative start, IC started stringing some good passes together c r e a t i n g g o o d w i l l o n the field a n d c o v e r i n g back w e l l . T h i s possession was s o o n c o n v e r t e d to a w e l l - t a k e n g o a l by G a r m e - . a n d by h a l f - t i m e the score was 3-0 U C L were d e n i e d several chances in the first h a l f by a g o o d first p e r f o r m a n c e by T o n y A t k i n s w h o was substituted to a l l o w a n o t h e r sweeper A n d y S t u a r t to p l a y his first game for I m p e r i a l . T h e second half f o u n d I C playing more g o o d open hockey but the l a c k o f fitness was very evident as the g a m e progressed (hmmm...Geoff.'). However, a further lour goals — giving Garmes a hattrick—ended a p r o m i s i n g game. It w o n ' t be as easy on S a t u r d a y . D o n ' t forget training. Tuesday 12:30pm Union G y m . T e a m : Ayres (2). Parker, Riley. Bell (2). Garmes (}), Jones. I-rank /in, Atkins. Hope, Stuart, Bansal. Pitkethley.
Seconds I C vs A m e r s h a m 1-1 T h e stench o f the still u n w a s h e d first team shirts c i r c u l a t e d a r o u n d the w o r r i e d laces o f the second t e a m . W h o w o u l d go in g o a l if Sk itter d i d not appear? E l d r i d g e was the r e p l y , at least the mask w o u l d keep h i m quiet. But then a flash o f light a n d the goalie entered stage r i g h t . S o out i n t o the w i n d a n d rain went the brave b u n c h a n d f o u n d t h e m selves i m m e d i a t e l y d o m i n a t e d by an A m e r s h a m t e a m w h o r e w a r d e d any s k i l l o n the part o f I C w i t h a tactless stick in the legs. T h e team battle d h a r d w i t h Slatter p l a y i n g a b l i n d e r in g o a l . ( F o r once commented an u n k i n d voice). U n f o r t u n a t e l y t h o u g h we were u n a b l e to stop the o p p o s i t i o n g r a b b i n g a short c o r n e r goal. A t a c t i c a l rearrangement at h a l f - t i m e a n d also d e c i d i n g to d r o p to the o p p o s i t i o n ' s level
FEUX
produced a gritty a n d a mighty physical performance. The I C forwards now remembering where the g o a l was a c t u a l l y put some shots in that d i r e c t i o n a n d somehow D u b l o n s k i managed to slot in an equaliser t h r o u g h a forest o f players. S o a n o t h e r g o o d result for the seconds m a i n l y due to i n s p i r e d l e a d e r s h i p (?) a n d a faultless C u n n i n g h a m p e r f o r m a n c e , but then a g a i n Sweeper is such a n easy p o s i t i o n to p l a y ! T e a m : Rolf, Pete, Andy, Tony, Duncan, Pete, Chaz, Roger, Paul, Simon, David, Nigel.
Breaking loose at Harlington.
Thirds In o r d e r to encourage a fast, o p e n g a m e , I C 3 r d X I chose to play w i t h o n l y eight men o n Saturday. This brave tactical g a m b l e n a r r o w l y f a i l e d to pay off despite a spirited performance from all concerned. Fine defensive work from B a i l e y a n d M o d l e y a n d a penalty flick save f r o m H e p p e r kept I C in the game early o n a n d gave rise to n u m e r o u s s p i r i t e d charges d o w n the field f r o m W a r d , J o n e s and acting captain Purdy. Close to the o p p o s i t i o n g o a l , h o w e v e r , I C f o u n d it d i f f i c u l t to break d o w n a tight defence, a l t h o u g h Salter came close to s c o r i n g o n several occasions. I C s p o s i t i v e a p p r o a c h led (on o c c a s i o n ) to a lack o f c o v e r i n defence a n d O C ' s l o o k a d v a n t a g e o f the o p p o r t u n i t y to score f o u r times d u r i n g the game. T h e fine spirit in w h i c h the m a t c h was p l a y e d was g r a p h i c a l l y i l l u s trated w h e n a m i s - h i t shot f r o m L y o n s was generously helped i n t o the g o a l by an o p p o s i t i o n d e f e n d e r — t h u s e n s u r i n g a well deserved c o n s o l a t i o n for I C at the end of a strenuous a f t e r n o o n .
over for a try in the c o r n e r ; putting a penalty over; and d r o p p i n g a g o a l , in the first ten m i n u t e s . 0-10. T h e I C f o r w a r d s n o w started to p l a y , a n d the front five were p u s h i n g their o p p o n e n t s a l l o v e r the p a r t . T h u s , at h a l f - t i m e I C were still o n l y 10-0 d o w n . In the second h a l f the f o r w a r d s c o n t i n u e d their d o m i n a n c e , a n d I C spent the m a j o r i t y o f the t i m e i n St T h o m a s ' 2 5 . T h i s w a s r e w a r d e d w i t h a try u n d e r the post by W K i n g , after a f o r wards' drive; and a penalty w h i c h was c o n v e r t e d by H M c D o w a l l . T h e score was n o w 9-10 a n d t h o u g h I C came close o n m a n y occasions they c o u l d not get the last score. H o w e v e r , in the last seconds o f the m a t c h I C were given a n o t h e r p e n a l t y in front o f the posts. H M c D o w a l l c o n v e r t e d this, a n d I C w o n 1210. T e a m : M Thompson. W Chapman. H McDouall. G Pike. R Fly nil. P Clarke. S Johns. I' Richards, E Smith, J Manzoni, P J Davies, A Verity, D McGee, Ralph, II' King.
Seconds I C vs Q E C 21-10
Rugby Firsts I C vs St T h o m a s ' s
12-10
T h e m a t c h against St T h o m a s ' was p l a y e d in the m o r n i n g d i u to the I n t e r n a t i o n a l in the a f t e r n o o n , a n d as a result m a n y were s t i l l s u f f e r i n g f r o m the night before escapades. One pe r s o n even h a d m a k e - u p o n ! A n y w a y . St T h o m a s ' w o n the toss a n d p l a y e d w i t h the w i n d . A s a c o n s e q u e n c e I C were i m m e d i a t e l y put u n d e r pressure by the l o n g k i c k s o f t h e i r f l y h a l l . T h i s r e s u l t e d, in them g o i n g
Wednesday O c t o b e r 13 saw I C 2nds k i c k o i l a b r a n d new season w i t h their a n n u a l r o u n d L o n d o n mystery t o u r . First stop o n this epic j o u r n e y ( o r g a n i s e d by W K i n g ) was C o l l i e r s W o o d , a pleasant little s u b u r b at the e n d o f the N o r t h e r n L i n e , apparently l a c k i n g in b o t h pubs a n d rugby teams. A f t e r a q u i c k s p i n of the c o m p a s s ( a n d a few p h o n e calls) it was back up the n o r t h e r n line a n d off to R i c h m o n d . A t this point there were several r e m a r k s to the tune o f ' O r a n g e T r e e ' a n d ' Y o u n g s S p e c i a l " , a n d even the c a s u a l 'get pissed". A f t e r a r r i v i n g at R i c h m o n d it was taxis tok P e t e r s h a m a n d legs the rest o f the w a v . A generally
lOctober 22,
1982
Photo: Steve Bishop r i p - r o a r i n g game e s u l t i n g i n a 21-0 w i n for IC with Pete Hardee, Bill Hinmers and M a r k S i m m o n s s c o r i n g the tries. Special a w a r d s go to E d ' I ' v e left m y k i t i n the t a x i ' O ' C o n n o r a n d T i m ' I ' m not p l a y i n g a n y more' Carr. P u k e of the week goes to W i l l C h a p m a n , a nice effort straight t h r o u g h the d o o r w a y f r o m a b o u t five y a r d s . T e a m : Bell, Edwards, Scabies. Carr, H ughes-N arborough, Hinmers, O'Connor. Pierce, Hutchinson. Clarke, Winsor. Hardee. Chapman, Simmonds, Eastland.
Football Thirds I C vs K i n g s ' 4-1 T h e 3 r d X I ' s first league game o f the season, against K i n g s ' 2 n d X I at H a r l i n g t o n . d i d not begin as we h a d h o p e d a n d by h a l f time we were 1-0 d o w n . H o w e v e r w i t h increased o r g a n i s a t i o n a n d effort in the second h a l f we got back into the g a m e . G o a l s by John Healy and Torsen Behling put us i n t o the l e a d , before the h i g h l i g h t o f the g a m e : a p o w e r f u l toe-poke from J o h n , fired straight at the g o a l k e e p e r , w h i c h was s o m e h o w f u m b l e d over the line. A n o t h e r close range shot in the last few m i n u t e s sealed o u r first w i n of the season.
Golf? It is extremely i m p o r t a n t that some member(s) o f the A C C G o l f C l u b sees the A C C C h a i r m a n as s o o n as p o s s i b l e , a v a i l able in the U n i o n O f f i c e every l u n c h t i m e . F a i l u r e to d o so by F r i d a y N o v e m b e r 5 m a y result in the s u s p e n s i o n o f G o l f C l u b ' s account.
Page13
mm**.
We're happy to Include all your events and fixtures In What's On, but please remember the deadline, 5:30pm, Monday. JCR
1230h Angling Club m e e t i n g to a r r a n g e a trip to W a l t h a m s t o w . 1300h U n i o n C o n c e r t Hall Islamic Society F r i d a y p r a y e r s '
1800h
B e i t
A
r
c
2 Pints...lC R a d i o ' s F r i d a y evening programme -Is this really gramme?
a radio
2230h F a l m o u t h
Mari Wilson who will be appearing A
pro-
A
A
A
I
ZUUUn
301m/999kHz Southside Bars
Atomic Rock o n IC R a d i o
h
J e w i s n Society Sabbath meal. The cost of the kosher food will be approximately £1
1930h
301m/999kHz Southside Bars
2200
Kitchens
Soup Run
-// you haven't got anything else to do, listen to Neil Collin's programme featuring the new Michael Schenkar Group album.
Upper Lounge .
Offbeat
Classics
2000h
ULU Ball M a n W i l l s o n is t h e m a i n a t t r a c t i o n at this a l l - n i g h t party. A d m i s s i o n £6.50 i n c evening meal. -With Carnival only three weeks away this is probably not worth attending unless you are either a great fan of Mari Willson or have absolutely nothing to do.
2030h Pagel4
Beit Arch
Cycling Club r u n to t h e L e a
'Talking about Musithon' features Antony Hopkins, one of Radio Three's most popular music critics, talking about Tchaikovsky's Fourth Symphony as never before. 'Conduct it Yourself allows absolutely anyone to try to conduct the RCM orchestra or just to turn up and suffer as others are conducting. 'Musithon Cabaret' is the event of the evening, Sir David Willcocks hosts a multitude of stars from the musical world, including Julian Lloyd-Webber, Jennifer Partridge, the Light Blues, Raimund Herincx, Peggy Spencer, Tim BrookeTaylor (?) and many more. Whether you want to just turn up and browse around the RCM, or go to as many concerts as possible pick up a leaflet with more details from the RCM foyer as soon as possible..
Saturday
Union Building
IC Film Soc p r e s e n t The Flicker (a s h o r t , but w e i r d film). 3 0 p a d m i s s i o n (free to m e m b e r s ) .
100Qh C o n s o r t G a l l e r y
Communion Service
Valley a n d E p p i n g Forest.
Fancy an enjoyable day hearing various forms of 'classical' music conducted by half-wits, blown on hosepipes and generally mangled to pieces? If so it's time to raid the current account and turn up at the Royal College of Music (the redbrick building between Aero and Mines) sometime after 10:00am on Saturday for Musithon, the highlight of the RCM Centenary year. For the princely sum of fifty pence you get admission to the building where you will be greeted by the sounds of buskers, pipers and a computer. For the main attractions of the day you will have to dig a little deeper into your pockets, and you will then be, able to assail your ears with 'Ten Harps, Ten Cellos, Ten Green Bottles' (RCM olavinn around again?), 'Taling about Musithon', Musicmagic, a concert by Peter Skellern, Musithon Cabaret and a concert of Dixieland jazz.
ULU Building
Sunday
1100h
Latin-American Freshers' Party
RSM Paint Your Face on Saturday.
at ULU tonight
G900h
Guilds Union Office
Rag Mag Trip to Oxford
2030h
JCR
RSM and Institut Frangais p r e s e n t Paint Your Face. £1 a d m i s s i o n for painted faces, o t h e r s £1.40. -Girls from the Institut Frangais w i l l be there.
| October 22,1982]
Definitely not for those with a hangover.
1300h U n i o n S C R Wargames Club play D u n g e o n s and Dragons.
1930h
Union Upper Lounge
Cricket Club c h e e s e & w i n e . A d m i s s i o n £1.50 for f r e s h e r s ; others £ 2 . -Not going to Australia with Mr Willis
Monday 1230h
Rag Office
Community A c t i o n G r o u p Meeting
1245h
Union Upper Lounge
Debating Society ' T h i s H o u s e b e l i e v e s that H u m a n N a t u r e is not o n e of G r e e d , S e l f i s h n e s s , a n d V i o l e n c e ' . T h e r e will be free s h e r r y for t h o s e w i t h a membership card.
:
FELIX
"ol
Elec
1900h
Wellsoc general meeting followed by Doppelganger. -An
astronaut,
Hendry,
played
discovers
image
earth
on
of the
sun.
The
Gerry
Anderson
by
a the
Ian
_ _.
Read Theatre Sherfield Building
1330n
Richard Dickins ends series on the 'Evolution of the Orchestra' with 'The Modern Orchestra'.
mirror other
effects of
side
are
by
Thunder-
birds.
4
oonu
Pippard Theatre Sherfield Building
l O O U n
Exploring the Uninhabitable T o m Sheppard talks on 'Solo Exploration in the Sahara'. 1930h J C R Dancing Club Advanced Class
What series Don't
a pity must miss
this come
excellent to an
this last
end.
talk. Industrial on
Tuesday
1730h Brown Committee Room Amnesty International meeting
1730h Volleyball Court Women's Volleyball Training Session
1245h Chemistry 231 Catholic Mass with lunch provided for 30p.
1300h
Industrial Society present a talk 'Exporting to J a p a n Mission Impossible?' given by Mr Eddie Ripley from the Department of Trade.
Socialist Society present a speaker from the Ecology Party -A
must
1300h STOIC broadcast -If
they
details
would
send
me
tell you
I could
all
some
for all those
to hear
an
whales,
bicycles,
who
interesting
want
talk
on
etc.
1800h Union S C R Wine Tasting Society claret tasting. Admission £1 for for members. -All
SDP
members
about
Physics LT2
1300h
MOPSOC present Prof Michael Seaton of U C L who will talk on 'Quantum Defect Theory'.
TV Lounges
1800h
Jolly
Southside Upper Lounge
1230h
Scout and Guide Club trip to the Sobell climbing wall and sports centre. wall is reckoned
hardest
Committee
Room
climbing
to be
wall
the
1930h
Ski Club dry slope skiing. £2.50 for two hours skiing, with free instruction.
1230h Under Union C l o c k X-Country Club league match Runners of all standards welcome.
1230h C h e m Eng E400 Methodist Society communion service All Christians are welcome.
Union
IC
Radio
programmes
FEUXI
have
three
this
week
important
Q u i e t
Sherlield
Koo
class
R o o m
Building
ICNAC present a slideshow of the U S A and tell y o u how you can go to the States next year.
Scout and Guide Club present a talk on natural history.
1240h Upper Southside Bar Model Aero Club meeting
Concert Hall
Stark
Dramsoc
you
want
to act
or Lord will be
2000h
able
like
Olivier, to
help
301m/999kHz Southside Bars
IC Radio present Alfred Freudenberger—the sound of America in South Ken.
Chem Eng LT2
Industrial Society present Mr R H Turner, director of finance Land Rover, who will talk on 'The Land R o v e r — A Success for British Industry'. - / fee/ sure Mr Turner will take pleasure in explaining how the Land Rover has clobbered overseas competition.
1300h Green Committee Room Sci Fi Club quiz
1415h
1315h Beit A rch Industrial Society visit to a Sunblest bakery. Members only.
1400h
Mines 303
1230h
1300h
-Whether
1930h J C R Dancing Club beginners
lifOUn
chaps.
in
Dramsoc acting workshops
jAonu
yomping
London.
Oramsoc brainstorming session to plan the sequel to last •year's Edinburgh Fringe tour
Opp Old Chemistry
a talk
1230h Southside Upper Lounge ICYHA butties meeting
Wednesday
STOIC repeat the lunchtime broadcast.
1900h
to hear
Thursday
welcome.
it.
1300h Union Upper Lounge Audio Soc Record Club Meet ing
at 1300h on Thursday
2230h Falmouth Kitchens Soup Run
-This
TV Lounges
are meeting
Rover
Union Concert Hall
1800h Chem Eng L T 2
Society
Land
Royal Albert Hall
Presentation Ceremony to mark Commemoration Day. Students without tickets will be admitted before 2:15pm on production of their unioncard. -This is the annual presentation of awards by each of the three constituent colleges. This is perhaps not the most exevent of the week and citing will not attract a vast attendance despite the fact it is quite interesting to see where you will hopefully be in years to come.
1730h Aero 254 Gliding Club meeting.
| Page. 5 |October22,19821
continued from front page
G e n e r a l , not w i s h i n g to take the b l a m e f o r the u n p o p u l a r fares rise, gave the G L C a d i s p e n s a t i o n to keep their fares increase below 50%. M r Livingstone rejoices i n future p o s s i b i l i t i e s f o r L a b o u r governments: dispensing local authorities f r om c o m p l i ance w i t h hangovers o f T o r y l e g i s l a t i o n . H e m a i n t a i n s that the c o u r t c a s e was ' W a r i n
P r i n c i p l e ' a n d that legal a u t h o r ities were d e v a s t a t e d by the adverse result. M r s T h a t c h e r w o u l d r a t h e r give i n to the A r g e n t i n i a n s t h a n give i n to the G L C , he s a i d . F u r t h e r fare cuts are a p p a r e n t l y i n the p i p e l i n e after the e n d o f the financial year despite g o v e r n m e n t d e m a n d s f o r a twelve percent rise. K e n L i v i n g s t o n e believes that there w i l l h a v e t o be a d r a m a t i c turnaround in public transport to prevent v i t a l business b e i n g s u c k e d o u t o f L o n d o n b y the new o r b i t M 2 5 m o t o r w a y . O n C i v i l Defence the speech m o v e d f r o m b l a c k h u m o u r , to d e a d l y seriousness. I f there is a nuclear war, M r Livingstone w o u l d be r e q u i r e d to help the m i l i t a r y t o r o o t out C N D activists (no doubt i n c l u d i n g himself). H e described i n g r a p h i c detail the h o r r i f y i n g six m i l l i o n deathroll of a two megaton strike. Protect and Survive he described as a m o n u m e n t a l t o n d e s c r i b i n g the w h o l e exercise as
a deliberate lie. The G L C intends to go into open conflict w i t h the government over the N u c l e a r Free Z o n e for L o n d o n a n d h o p e s to f o r c e an o p e n P a r l i a m e n t a r y debate o n the c o n f i d e n t i a l Queens O r d e r T w o p l a n to seal off L o n d o n . T h e r e were several questions after the speech. T h e qu e s ti on o f rates was raised, f r o m several angles, and M r Livingstone p o i n t e d out that the F a r e ' s F a i r policy with a comparable government subsidy c o u l d put 15p o n the rates; w i t h o u t subsidy it w o u l d cost ÂŁ1.50.
Debsoc Comes Out T h e newly r e c o n s t i t u t e d D e b a t i n g Society h e l d its first event for f o u r years on M o n d a y . T h e m o t i o n ' T h i s H o u s e believes that M u l t i l a t e r a l i s t s live i n a D r e a m W o r l d ' , p r o p o s e d by M i c h a e l
N o r m a n a n d seconded b y L a I a t r o u , was defeated b y N i c k S k e t c h , w h o was seconded by Stephen C u r r y . W i t h the Dossible e x c e p t i o n o f M i s s I a t r o u , o f a l l the speakers had obviously had previous debating experience. Most impressive was M r C u r r y , whose technique a n d use o f c h a r m i n g metaphors complemented Mr S k e t c h ' s s o l i d a r g u m e n t s . I n the v o t i n g at the e n d , the o p p o s i t i o n received three times as m a n y votes as the p r o p o s e r s . M e m b e r s h i p of the society n o w stands at over fifty, most o f w h o m are expected to speak at least o n c e every y e a r ; the o r g a n i s e r s are d e t e r m i n e d to a v o i d r e g u l a r speakers. F u t u r e events i n c l u d e a debate on Public Schools with external speakers, i n c l u d i n g a C o n s e r v a tive M P a n d the C h a i r m a n o f the I L E A . Free sherry w i l l be o n offer next week as a n a d d e d i n d u c e m e n t to a t t e n d the debate o n the H e a l t h Service.
PINOCCHIO • mmmmammmmmammmm in order to make s o m e money and relieve the burden o n the hard-pressed taxpayer, British Rail intend to operate s o m e special excursions on the scenic route between the resorts of Higher Payrise and KiHinbuckton. Killinb u c k t o n is a terminus (the last resort?), and the train will have to be turned a r o u n d . T h e train is to comprise the steam locomotive 'the F l y i n g P i c k e t ' , o n e s e c o n d class c a r , one restaurant car, and a Pullman observation car, with windows in the rear. T h e layout of track at K i l l i n b u c k t o n is in the form of a triangle, as shown. T h e figures indicate how many vehicles will fit in each section of track. T h e problem, then, is this: 1. T h e train arrives from Higher Payrise in the order: locomotive, s e c o n d class coach, restaurant car, Pullman car; it must leave in the same order, but facing in the opposite direction. 2. T h e locomotive and the Pullman car must have been turned a r o u n d when they leave, the restaurant car and the s e c o n d class c o a c h need not be. 3. Killinbuckton is entirely flat, hence no rolling of vehicles is allowed. 4. N o t h i n g c a n move without being coupled to the locomotive. 5. Everything must be at a standstill for c o u p l i n g or u n c o u p l i n g to t a k e p l a c e (no 'pushing'). W h a t is the m i n i m u m number of moves required to turn the train (the first move starts with the train standing on the line from Higher Payrise; a move ends whenever the locomotive has to stop for coupling, uncoupling or a change of direction)? Solutions, comments,criticisms to me at the FELIX Office by Wednesday, 1:00pm. £5 from Menda-Bike for a randomly selected entry.
G e n e r a l Reisenschein's The terminus at Killinbuckton
Last Week's
Solution
Last week's problem was rather trivial, but for those of y o u w h o failed to obtain the solution, Q u e n t i n went with M a r y R i c h a r d went with M u n g o Steve went with M a n d y T i m went with Midge O f the sixteen entries, the winner was, for the second time, J i m W a r d of C h e m E n g 1 (I assure you I don't know him!), who can collect his prize o n M o n d a y (after 1:30pm please). General
Reisenschein
A l l right, I'm sorry, in the second statement of G e n e r a l Reisenschein's problem I did use the w o r d 'congruent'. W h a t I meant was, the same size and shape, and I was just saving space, and unfortunately, making a mistake at the same time. A l s o , I shall admit that the dissection is not terribly convenient for offices, consisting as it does, of two rooms, but here you are, the moment you've all been waiting for.
Offices
O n the second try, nineteen people solved the problem, and the winner(s) chosen at r a n d o m w a s G a r y S m i t h , C i v E n g 3, i n collaboration with S u s a n Griffiths, and G a r y c a n pick up the cheque on M o n d a y from the F E L I X Office. Revenge Banana's Congratulations to anyone who managed to solve this problem. A solution, and, I suspect, the unique solution, is 1. P - K 4 N-KB3 2. P - K B 3 N x P 3. Q - K 2 N-N6 4. Q x P c h Q x Q c h 5. K - B 2 N x R mate If y o u want to advertise any event by use of a puzzle in this c o l u m n , then drop me a note, saying what prize you're going to donate (eg the orchestra will be giving away two tickets for their concert), and what you'd like the puzzle to be about. A b o u t three weeks notice (or more!) w o u l d be appreciated, but 1 must k n o w at least a fortnight before the event. If you wish to take advantage of this special offer (before it runs out!) drop a line to me in the P i n o c c h i o box in the F E L I X Office.
FELIX is published by the Editor for and on behalf of Imperial College Union Publications Board, and is printed by the Union Print Unit, Prince Consort Road, London SW7 2BB. Tel. Oi-589 5111 Ext 1048 or Internal 288/. Editor: Martin S Taylor; Business Manager: Peter A Rodgers: Advertising Manager: Nick Thexton. Copyright FELIX 1982.