http://felixonline.co.uk/archive/IC_1999/1999_1155_A by Ravi Pall

1 November 1999: Issue 1155

: '

busies

Fight clubs force Union shut-down ANDREW OFORI

The

fight

pushing

broke

a n d shoving

out when between

ended nose

the night

with

precluding himfrom

broken

"Stewards

all his

safety a n d o c c a s i o n a l l y that

sports t e a m s led to tempers flaring

team's matches since the event. A

O c t o b e r were subjected to partic-

footballer commented "The

Students in DBs o n W e d n e s d a y 2 0

stage.

T h e first

unfortunate

a r e there

means

breaking u pa fight" He

whole

went

o n t o s a y "It's

shame; because

thing was a d i s g r a c e . "

for people's

of a small

group

u l a r l y lively f o r m o f e n t e r t a i n m e n t

w a s a p e a c e m a k e r , w h o w a s struck

as a brawl o n the stage c l o s e d t h e

as he tried t o defuse th e situation

Union

leading to two sportsmen tussling.

d i d n ' t k n o w w h a t w a s g o i n g o n , it

d o w n , but w e h a d t o give

S t e w a r d s split u p t h e p a i r only f o r

a l l just b l e w u p . A l l I d i d w a s try t o

e r a t i o n t o p e o p l e i n t h e r e . I h o p e it

the fight t o e s c a l a t e t o a n a l t e r c a -

stop

won't be repeated."

early.

A into

packed anarchy

venue as

descended

sports

clashed.

T h e licensees

decision

to close

teams

took the

between

ballers.

became

The

the Union

1 2 . 4 5 a m as the situation

tion

rowers

a n d foot-

Another

erupted

once

mate

added,

decking

some

Marketing

t h e Ents a n d

Manager

felt t h e

unsafe. The stewards duly restored

again outside the Union a n d col-

stewards

lege

a n d refuted c l a i m s that s o m e

cleared.

with t h e incident.

One

sportsman

of p e o p l e w e h a d t o s h u t t h e n i g h t

The Home,

a fragile c a l m and the U n i o n w a s

security were c a l l e d t o d e a l

bloke" Mark

situation

sportsman

viduals

h a d followed

h a d been

ICU

produre

treated

indi-

harshly

dealt

is c u r r e n t l y

matter

with

consid-

being

by t h e l i c e n s e e s .

number of people have been temporarily b a n n e d f r o m the U n i o n a s a n i n v e s t i g a t i o n i n t o t h e i n c i d e n t is carried out.

Contractor cock-up causes costly computer chaos GARETH

MORGAN

been

confirmed

a s Felix w e n t t o

press. Substantial

Building

was caused

damage

currently

to the D e p a r t m e n t o f C o m p u t i n g ' s new c o m p u t e r l a b by a f l o o d

but

last

Builders w o r k i n g o n the library

in t h e Huxley

needed to remove

worked.

Unfortunately

the

i c e , a n d a large

water escaped

Remedial

action

has seen

n u m b e r of industrial heaters draft-

they

the pipe

in t o s p e e d

process,

melted

volume of

while

u p the drying

a number

computers have been

b e f o r e it c o u l d b e

One

t u r n e d off. Studio

division

comment.

building

a n d replace a

c o n t a i n e d hot water which

Projects C o -

in t h e Estates

was unfortunately not av ailabl e to

Maths

w a t e r p i p e , s o f r o z e it w h i l e

A B B are

the d a m a g e ,

Peter S c h r e i b e r ,

ordinator

weekend.

contractors

assessing

bemused

of the

protected.

D O C student

s a i d "I w o n d e r w h a t t h e h e l p d e s k only

opened

at t h e e n d o f S e p t e m b e r ,

B, w h i c h

suffered

most o f the d a m a g e - " A d i s a s t e r " according to Deputy

w o u l d h a v e s a i d if I h a d r a n g u p and

Photo: Joel

Roofing looking decidedly soggy

The extent of the d a m a g e a n d

Departmen-

tal A d m i n i s t r a t o r A n n e O ' N e i l l , a s

Lab 2 0 6 , a n o t h e r t e a c h i n g

labo-

are

this is D O C ' s

ratory, w a s a l s o d a m a g e d .

There

l o w e r l e v e l s , a l t h o u g h this h a d n o t

main teaching

lab.

c o m p l a i n e d that my m o t h e r -

board was squleching."

also

reports

of d a m a g e

the

possible

huge.

repair

bill c o u l d b e

Commemoration Day '99 DAVID ROBERTS The Notional Union of Students Commemoration once

on t o HI

again

save the a n n u a l

D a y passed off

w i t h o u t a n y real

note,

i n v a s i o n o f ex-stu-

d e n t s in s t r a n g e outfits c l o g g i n g u p the c a m p u s last

Wednesday.

The graduation ceremony, which commemorates

Buying beau: •

•

G e o r g e VI a n d Q u e e n

il^;

the

of King

E l i z a b e t h in

1 9 4 8 to celebrate the centenary of

.. .

thMtsslfSiiirfoilld^

t h e visit

we investi-

Royal

School

Chemistry,

p a s s e d off w i t h o u t a hitch, a n d w a s if anything

lllnion

slightly

shorter

year's

programme.

1300

o r s o graduates

than

A s well

last

as the

w h o were

p a r a d e d i n f ron t o f the C h a i r m a n o f

Ji jhi i O ' • 'i 1

11 i' • - communi-

cation: front.

G o v e n o r s , the afternoon also include d the p r e s e n t a t i o n o f f o u r n e w H o n -

This year's graduate await their fifteen minutes of fame

Photo: Jonas

orary C o l l e g e Fellows, a n d the c o m -

Columns

m e m o r a t i o n o f the fiftieth a n n i v e r s a r y

the

A l t h o u g h this t o o p a s s e d w i t h o u t a n y

the f ou n dat i o n

of the C o l l e g e

Choir.

graduates

the

Union.

currently

underway

examine

w h e t h e r t h e U n i o n c a n truly s u p p o r t

n o t a b l e i n c i d e n t it c o u l d p r o v e m e m -

b o t h this e v e n t a n d t h e S u m m e r

with t h e

o r a b l e in future years a s the last e v e r

(for m o r e d e t a i l s s e e this w e e k ' s State

C o m m e m o r a t i o n Ball, organised for

Ball o f it's type. A t h o r o u g h r e v i e w is

of the U n i o n o n p a g e 9 ) .

week's

The

d a y culminated

Ball

In Brief C H A R I N G C R O S S SALE

e m p l o y m e n t rights. Waivers

with t h e

R u m o u r s h a v e b e e n flying r o u n d t h e

r e l e a s e o f the E m p l o y m e n t

office'

Act

of U n i o n

regarding

hacks

all week

a possible shake

u p at

C h a r i n g C r o s s library. the directors o f the

The Wipe O u t

day coincided

W i t c h Pr

secretary

signed

The general

of the A s s o c i a t i o n

com-

ill •

^i'

view of C & G U ' s term,

l a r g e s t v e n t u r e this

the Freshers

Dinner"

com-

"reviewing

N o staff i n H i g h e r E d u c a t i o n s h o u l d

e v e n t h a s a s t r o n g r e p u t a t i o n a n d is

s p a c e " with a p o s s i b l e view t o m o v -

ever b e o b l i g e d to sigh a w a y their

a p e r f e c t i n t r o d u c t i o n t o this U n i o n .

ing two floors of journals a n d peri-

e m p l o y m e n t rights."

I a m c o n f i d e n t w e will n o t s e e a

are

occupied Care

BOMBS

the

by t h e U n i o n .

would

most

likely

Newton,

dent, a n d Becky England,

Presi-

ICSMSU

City

Guilds

Union

held

S t a r W a r s n i g h t last

their

engineers

the 2 9 t h t o g e t a better i d e a o f w h a t

disco, bar a n d a b i g screen playing

is h a p p e n i n g .

the

entire

fashion.

organised

of Lucas'

series

The

casino,

space

T h e restrictions o n international students w o r k i n g while studying in the UK

have

been

o p e r a . Despite a n impressive poster

the

European

campaign

longer

featuring

Tarantino-

librarys will b e subjected t o s i m i l a r

esque

r e p o r t e d t o h a v e f l o p p e d with o n l y

tary

35-40

people

Employment.

C&GU

President,

sarajah, Monday

made

the event w a s

turning

admitted

up.The

Dinesh

a loss o f £ 3 6 6 ,

w a s a W O W d a y . It formed part o f

offer

n o explanation

t h e c a m p a i g n a g a i n s t university staff

turnout.

h a v i n g t o routinely sign a w a y their

ticket p r i c e o r t h e h i g h

a n d could

for the

low

H e d i d n o t th ink t h e £ 5 male-female

Overseas

Area are

to individually

obtain the permission of the Secre-

Gane-

the event h a d

Economic

required

reviews.

misquotes

eased.

students w h o a r e n o t nationals of

Chelsea

A c c o r d i n g t o t h e A U T last

another

ACCESS T O WORK

It is u n l i k e l y that e i t h e r St M a r y ' s

WAIVERS W A R

a r e giving

o f yet

storming night."

f l o p p e d in spectacula r

Westminster's

bookings

indication

r e p l a c e last y e a r ' s b o a t party w h i c h

P r e s i d e n t , a r e p l a n n i n g t o m e e t with

and

"This

Friday

t h e J C R . It w a s i n t e n d e d

the a d m i n i s t r a t i o n at C h a r i n g X o n

pre-sale

early

themed

Union

Mr. Ganesarajah.

repeat o f th e Stars W a r s night a n d

C & G U NIGHT

m a i n b u i l d i n g i n t o t h e s p a c e t h a t is

Natasha

We're

m a y have suffered a m i n o r

administration

t a k e o v e r t h e s p a c e left.

mountaineering a n d

"We

s e t b a c k , b u t it is h a r d l y s i g n i f i c a n t i n

mented

Primary

Radio d r o p by to soy " h i " .

present

m e n t e d " T h i s is a n i s s u e o f f a i r n e s s .

currently

Gliding,

the people

b e e n s a i d t h e o f f i c i a l line is t h a t t h e

o d i c a l s d o w n t o the basement of the S

that

s e e m e d to h a v e e n j o y e d the night.

1 9 9 9 .The A U T have n o w

p u s h e d for c u r r e n t w a i v e r s by staff t o b e r e v o k e d .

Although nothing concrete has

Relations

r a t i o in G u i l d s w a s t o b l a m e a n d added

of State

The

for Education a n d

assessment

students'

f i n a n c i a l m e a n s by U K i m m i g r a t i o n has

also

been

altered.

work at a higher o r further

Part-time educa-

t i o n institute is n o t t a k e n into sideration

con-

Nobel Peace Prizewinner launches lecture series CARSTEN ROHR

S h o r t l y a f t e r Sir J o s e p h ' s d i s c o v w a r broke

ery,

o u t in

Europe.

His

colleagues

preferred

t o stay

until t h e first test h a d b e e n c o m p l e t -

In t h e s a m e

spirit, a

someone

A t o m i c scientists in t h e U S A w r o t e t o

ed,

a s k e d y o u to build a n u c l e a r b o m b ?

President Roosevelt, w a r n i n g o f the

directing

d a n g e r s p o s e d by a G e r m a n a t o m -

t a r g e t s . By that s t a g e t h e b o m b h a d

lectures,

ic w e a p o n a n d u r g i n g h i m t o f u n n e l

b e c o m e a p o l i t i c a l a n d military c o n -

social

cern.

T h e g r o u p will b e a c t i v e l y

What

would

y o u d o if

T h i s is n o t a q u e s t i o n that m a n y of us a r e likely t o c o n s i d e r , b u t last M o n d a y , N o b e l laureate Sir J o s e p h

research

R o t b l a t s h a r e d his t h o u g h t s , e x p e r i -

atomic bomb.

into

a n allied

making

yet m o s t

later

"Student

P u g w a s h " g r o u p h a s b e e n set u p at

voted

against

Imperial

upon

civilian

l e c t u r e m a r k e d t h e first in a serie s o f

the b o m b

C o l l e g e a n d Sir Joseph's

aimed

at exploring the

r e s p o n s i b i l i t i e s o f scientists. involved

R o o s e v e l t g a v e his

Sir J o s e p h m o v e d i n t o m e d i c a l

in t h e f o r t h c o m i n g P u g w a s h C o n f e r -

ences a n d motivation f o r e m b a r k -

c o n s e n t to the project, c o d e - n a m e d

p h y s i c s w h e r e h e c o n t i n u e d his d i s -

e n c e o n S c i e n c e a n d W o r l d Affairs

ing

the " M a n h a t t a n

a n d subsequently

resigning

f r o m the a t o m i c b o m b project d u r -

b e f o r e the Pearl H a r b o u r b o m b i n g . the direction

Under

ing the S e c o n d W o r l d Wa r .

o n e d a y tinguished career a n d spent

Project",

of Robert

h e l d in C a m b r i d g e in A u g u s t 2 0 0 0 ,

o f his t i m e c a m p a i g n i n g f o r p r a c t i -

a n event that draws influential sci-

cal a n d socially responsible a p p l i -

entists f r o m a r o u n d t h e w o r l d . T h e

the project w a s

cations of science.

H e is t h e o n l y

his first thirty y e a r s i n P o l a n d b e f o r e

b a s e d a t Los A l a m o s , N e w M e x i c o

surviving signatory

o f t h e Russell-

John

moving

a n d c a l l e d a l m o s t every t o p - r a n k i n g

Einstein

a l l i e d scientist t o its c a u s e .

w h i c h l e d t o a m e e t i n g o f scientists

Royal

Energy. H e w i l l s p e a k o n " W i l l C l i -

B o r n in 1 9 0 8 , S i r J o s e p h s p e n t

to Liverpool

neutron

scattering

Chadwick.

James

D u r i n g his t i m e a t Liver-

pool

a n d almost

with

other

deduced

to work o n under

Oppenheimer,

much

simultaneously Sir

groups,

Joseph

the chain-reaction for

nuclear fission a n d b e c a m e

aware

Sir J o s e p h a g r e e d with t h e p r o ject's

m o t i v a t i o n , that

it w a s vital

that t h e allies d e v e l o p weapon

a n atomic

before the Nazis, to safe-

g u a r d d e m o c r a c y a g a i n s t the worst

of t h e e n o r m o u s q u a n t i t y o f e n e r g y

kind

that c o u l d b e r e l e a s e d .

w h e n intelligence sources

H e spoke

of totalitarianism.

However, revealed

a smali

Canadian

"Pugwash

it c o u l d

become

have

b e c o m e a n influential b o d y of e m i -

upon

in t h e U n i o n

Weekly meetings a r e o n Thurs-

the application of

days at 1 p m in the B r o w n c o m m i t -

It w a s S i r J o s e p h ' s

tee

him the N o b e l

room,

come!.

a n d everyone

P e a c e Prize, t o g e t h e r with t h e P u g -

society

w a s h o r g a n i s a t i o n in 1 9 9 5 .

www.su.ic.ac.uk/pugwash.

can

found

Overseas Societies Undergraduate Research DINESH G A N E S A R A J A H

d i s c o , I n t e r n a t i o n a l N i g h t is t h e o n e

O n the 5th attempt to h o l d elections

are given the opportunity to reveal

for a n e w c o m m i t t e e f o r the 1 9 9 9 /

t h e i r c u l t u r e t o t h e rest o f I m p e r i a l .

o c c a s i o n where overseas

2 0 0 0 A c a d e m i c year, t h e O v e r s e a s Students

Committee

(OSC)

seems

However,

to f i n a l l y h a v e a set o f o f f i c e r s t o

will

represent the overseas

event.

Imperial Ganesh

College

have

even

another

s p e l l t h e e n d o f this

annual

In this l i g h t , t h e n e w c o m m i t t e e will h a v e a t o u g h task a h e a d . N o w

M o gaining

a n d Sachin

attaining

T h e previous

efforts t o

that t h e n e w a c a d e m i c y e a r is fully

recently,

hold elections h a d been unsuccess-

the c h a l l e n g e f o r t h e n e w c o m m i t tee l o o k s t o b e e v e n t o u g h e r . T h e

voters (the c h a i r s o f t h e i n d i v i d u a l

challenges

OSC

catch

With 3 0 % of Imperial

College

will

include

up to b e c o m i n g

playing financially

t r a i n e d a n d v e r s e d in t h e b u r e a u -

m a d e u p f o r e i g n s t u d e n t s , O S C is

cracy of I C U , a s well a s i m p r o v i n g

seen as playing a n important role in

communication

Imperial

C o l l e g e . T h e highlight of

g r o u p a n d its s o c i e t i e s , t h e l a c k o f

the O S C c a l e n d a r h a s a l w a y s b e e n

w h i c h h a s b e e n t h e very r e a s o n f o r

between

I n t e r n a t i o n a l N i g h t , w h i c h in r e c e n t

the late e l e c t i o n s . W i t h I n t e r n a t i o n a l N i g h t just o v e r 3 m o n t h s a w a y , t h e

make

1 9 9 9 / 2 0 0 0 A c a d e m i c year looks

f o o d fair f o l l o w e d by a s h o w a n d

• Undergraduates assist academic staff with their researches • Directory of 1999-2000 opportunities available from Room 313C Mechanical Engineering • Information meeting (including Delaware,USA, exchange scheme) Wednesday, 3 November 13.15 14.00 Room 342 Mechanical Engineering Building

the O S C

years h a s c o n t i n u e d t o consistently heavy losses. Traditionally a

Programme

u n d e r w a y , with t h e n e w p e r s o n n e l only having b e e n elected

ful d u e t o t h e l o w t u r n o u t o f e l i g i b l e

societies).

Opportunities

been

disaster

w a s victorious in w i n n i n g

Vice-Chair Treasurer.

that

societies

Sen

O S C C h a i r , with

the

societies of

Union.

there

suggestions

t o b e a n i n t eres t i n g o n e f o r O S C .

• Discover more on http://www.hu.ic.ac.uk/urop/ Help academic staff and help your career:

Join U R O P now

is w e l -

information o n the

b o m b c h a n g e d a n d Sir J o s e p h t o o k

Comittee elected at last

Dining

Hall.

the

u n p o p u l a r decision to resign.

Nuclear

at 1 p m o n T h u r s d a y 4 t h

November

n e n t scientists that c o n t i n u e t o v o i c e opinions

efforts that e a r n e d

that

Since then, the

Conferences"

science today.

potentially devastating w e a p o n .

a n d previously of the

Commission

m a t e C h a n g e D r i v e N u c l e a r Prolif-

dering, the motivation to build the

agreed

Pug-

by D r .

t h e Physics

eration?"

that t h e G e r m a n p r o j e c t w a s f l o u n -

over

town,

Department

b e given from

a n d w o r l d affairs.

the potential

Chadwick

document

will

Hassard

w a s h , t o discuss the role of s c i e n c e

uses o f s u c h a n e n e r g y s o u r c e a n d

with

manifesto,

lecture

Them and NUS DAVID ROBERTS

dents

unions, which

anyone

can

to-be-apolitical IC, the shear

level

wych G r o u p , whose

aims,

objec-

j o i n f o r a tiny f e e ) , T U C O (the C o l -

of b e h i n d - t h e - s c e n e s

machinations

tives a n d m e m b e r s h i p a r e v e r y dif-

A s w e all (hopefully) know, Imperial

lege

ferent. Fo r starters, the G r o u p w a s

College

consortiums,

a n d local

o r g a n i s e d by M r P a k e s s h o c k e d t h e

consequently

e n t i r e N U S C o n f e r e n c e . In a d e s -

set u p t o r e p r e s e n t t h e s t u d e n t s o f

Why

g e t s , by a n d l a r g e , t h e s a m e (if n o t

perate attempt to cling to p o w e r v i a

the

not? After a l l , practically every oth er

better) p r i c e s t h a n e v e r y o t h e r u n i o n

splinter sections of the L a b o u r b l o c k

recent

c o l l e g e a n d u n i v e r s i t y u n i o n in t h e

in t h e c o u n t r y .

vote, M r Pakes withdrew the L a b o u r

substantially

Student

t h e f i f t e e n m e m b e r s ) a n d h a s a s it's

isn't

affiliated

N a t i o n a l U n i o n of Students.

country

member,

the

purchasing group) and

[with t h e

exception of most of the Scottish Higher

Education

which more month,

(of

institutions

later) a n d , a s o f last

UMIST],

yet

since

the

endorsement from

several

"better"

primary objective the a v o i d a n c e of top-up,

s e n f r o m t h e key i n s t i t u t i ons a n d

fees f o r h o m e students. M o r e o v e r ,

means-tested

v o t i n g g r o u p s . H e is n o w , o f c o u r s e ,

although

t i p p e d f o r a v e r y s e n i o r j o b in t h e

membership

b e e n a m e m b e r f o r a g r a n d total of

any

Labour

Group's

six y e a r s .

p o w e r at the highest levels, p u s h f o r

group

people?

exert

Party's next e l e c t i o n

paign

(another

shows

that

cam-

i n t e r e s t i n g statistic

w h e n T r e v o r P h i l l i p s (a f o r m e r I C U

the

President

Deputy

fair a n d e q u a l treatment a n d pro-

there were sixteen different

M a y o r of London) was leading the

vide a system of s u p p o r t a n d t r a i n -

MPs

NUS].

i n g , right?

position of N U S President...).

and

potential

rights o f it's m e m b e r s ,

In t h e o r y , that's

ensure

exactly

a f t e r t h e last

election Labour

ICU

f e c t i v e it h a s p r o v o k e d

and £50K

con-

of the N U S

that

Effectively, I C U d o e s n ' t n e e d t o to the that

NUS

in t h e full

the N U S

(however

cam-

ineffectively)

b e h a l f o f it's s t u d e n t s a n y w a y . Put

s i m p l y , n o t h i n g w i l l c h a n g e until a n

s o b a d l y o r g a n i s e d a n d inefdamnation

o n securing

than

paigns

than enviable. O p p o s i t i o n to fees

£20K

impressive

reality,

was

(as

the Aldwych

itself.

knowledge

Re-affiliating t o the N U S w o u l d cost

member

is f r e e ) ,

record

affiliate

it's c a m p a i g n i n g

is a

a n d tutorial

c r e t e a c c o m p l i s h m e n t s is n o m o r e

w h o h a d previously held the

r e c o r d in r e c e n t y e a r s h a s b e e n less

between

ICU

w h a t t h e N U S is s u p p o s e d t o d o . In however,

differ

the identities of

a set o f h a n d p i c k e d p u p p e t s c h o -

national

[ I C U last left in 1 9 7 9 ,

(although

might

of his c o l l e a g u e s a n d p a s s e d it o n t o

O K , s o what's the point of h a v i n g a body for

tables

with

1930's Imperial C o l l e g e U n i o n has

representative

universities

League

appreciable

number

unions

Basically, they're aren't a n y a l t e r n a -

leave N U S - a n d c o n s i d e r i n g the

year, d e p e n d i n g o n w h o y o u t a l k t o ,

f r o m every sector of H i g h e r E d u c a -

tives.

general

n u m b e r o f s t u m b l i n g b l o c k s that t h e

but in a l l p r o b a b i l i t y t h e f i n a l f i g u r e

tion. O p p o s i t i o n to the a b o l i t i o n of

don't tend to work o n a c o m p e t i -

leaders of the national body tend to

would be a r o u n d £ 3 0 0 0 0 . H o w e v -

grants

tive, free market

er, that's o n l y a fifth o f w h a t w e p a y

a n d it's o n l y n o w , with t h e d e c i s i o n s

what kind of national

the U n i v e r s i t y o f L o n d o n U n i o n , o r

in p l a c e a n d a l m o s t e n t i r e l y u n a l -

t i o n c o u l d b e a c h i e v e d if t h e r e w e r e

u n l i k e l y , a t l e a s t in t h e s h o r t t e r m .

t e r a b l e , that m a r c h e s a n d d e m o n -

two

For

strations of a n y note a r e b e g i n n i n g

t o filter t h r o u g h f r o m t h e l e a d e r -

b o d y that c o m e s c l o s e is t h e A l d -

of the Union's

total

College

g r a n t , s o is it r e a l l y t h a t m u c h ? W e l l , from a cost point of view, NUS

effectiveness

m e m b e r s h i p of the

primarily means

membership

of N U S S L ( N U S S e r v i c e s Ltd), w h i c h

ship.

was equally

Nonetheless,

sentation

non-existent,

national

repre-

and campaigning

is a n

e s s e n t i a l r e q u i r e m e n t if w e a r e t o

is r e g a r d e d b y m o s t s t u d e n t s u n i o n s

h a v e a n y i n p u t in t h e w a y H i g h e r

as t h e m a i n r e a s o n f o r s t a y i n g w i t h

E d u c a t i o n is r u n in t h e next m i l l e n -

the n a t i o n a l b o d y . N U S S L is e f f e c -

n i a - s o w o u l d n ' t it b e better t o b e

tively

consortium

o n t h e i n s i d e ? T h e d i f f i c u l t y is that

purchasing

t h e p r o b l e m with N U S is e n d e m i c

c h e a p supplies of beer, stationary,

rather than issue-specific. Until the

f o o d , s p o r t s kit a n d o t h e r

entire

which

allows

unions

access

student

national

student

movement

radical

shake-up,

s t a p l e s - in o t h e r w o r d s it's t h e r e a -

undergoes

son that student bars u p a n d d o w n

nothing's going to change...

the c o u n t r y m a n a g e

to keep

their

So what

communication?

a n d P R ? O r is it s i m p l y t h e c a s e that

to l e a v e t h e n a t i o n a l b o d y - a s t h e y

t h e N U S l e a d e r s h i p puts it's p o l i t i c a l

weren't a l l o w e d t o disaffiliate f r o m

g o a l s a h e a d of the n a t i o n a l student

one without automatically

quitting

interest. T h e f a c t that w h e n , in t h e

resigned from the

last r o u n d o f e l e c t i o n s , N U S P r e s i -

N U S a s a w h o l e in p r o t e s t . However,

Poor

it t h r e a t e n e d t o b e t h e first t i m e in seventeen

p r i c e s o r b u y it's b e e r o n t h e b l a c k

d e n t s (the y o u t h w i n g o f t h e L a b o u r

market?

party)

simpler -

years

that

Labour

The only

E , , S

probably a strong sign of the political nature of the o r g a n i s a t i o n . A n d

Northern

whilst a n y kind o f political a g i t a t i o n

purchasing stu-

E E

h a d n o t c o n t r o l l e d N U S is

instead o f rigidly a d h e r i n g t o o n e

is g o i n g t o s e e m f o r e i g n t o p r o u d -

put in t h e w a y o f p o t e n t i a l l e a v e r s , such

outcome

n o w we'll

happily

than

just c o n t i n u e t o sit

o n the outside,

awaiting

developments.

FELIX NEEDS YOU

Stu-

c o n s o r t i u m I C U uses a mixture of (a

campaigning

directions.

a s e c o n d t e r m by a n a r r o w m a r g i n ,

L o n d o n - s o d o e s I C s u b s i d i s e it's

Services

bodies

representa-

marketing

as l o w a s a n y o t h e r s t u d e n t b a r in

g r o u p set u p by t h e S c o t t i s h

basis - after a l l ,

dent A n d r e w Pakes w a s returned f o r

b a r prices at) IC a r e

N o , it's m u c h

p r i c e s s o l o w . It's a l s o t h e r e a s o n

o t h e r , they

national opposing

Union's

the p r o b l e m ? Lack of

that t h e S c o t t i s h u n i v e r s i t i e s d e c i d e d

the

Trades

Last week, amidst a storm of media and scientific controversy, auction site ronsangels.com went on-line, attracting over a

million hits in it's first day alone. Rather than selling household

goods, antiques or bric-a-brac, ronsangels.com is exclusively dedicated to the sale of human eggs and sperm from Am erican models. Is it moral? Is it legal? Is it ethical? Above all, is it true? David Roberts investigates. Thanks

to reformed

pornographer

Ron Harris, y o u

n o w h a v e the opportunity t o buy beauty f o r y o u r child r e n . Fork o u t e n o u g h c a s h (anything u p to a quarter

i n t e l l i g e n c e o r s o c i a l s k i l l s , w i l l h e l p y o u r c h i l d r e n in

of a million dollars) a n d , a c c o r d i n g t o M r Harris, y o u r

their quest f o r h a p p i n e s s a n d s u c c e s s " . H e ' s a d a m a n t

children c a n b e the s u p e r m o d e l s of t o m o r r o w . There's

that f o c u s i n g entirely o n l o o k s at t h e e x p e n s e of a n y

just o n e d r a w b a c k - t h e y w o n ' t b e y o u r c h i l d r e n . W h a t

other feature

y o u ' r e b u y i n g h e r e i s n ' t s t a t e - o f - t h e - a rt g e n e t h e r a p y

d e m e a n i n g p u r s u i t , a n d is utterly u n a p o l o g e t i c a b o u t

q u a l i t y is n o t a s h a l l o w o r

h i s i d e o l o g y " B e a u t y is it's o w n r e w a r d - this is t h e first

it's the unfertilised e g g s o r s p e r m o f A m e r i c a n m o d e l s .

s o c i e t y t o truly c o m p r e h e n d h o w i m p o r t a n t b e a u t i f u l

Given

genes areto our evolution",

a gallery of " b e a u t i f u l p e o p l e " , with pictures, measurements, you c a n bid to,

e f f e c t i v e l y , h a v e t h e i r c h i l d r e n . Still i n t e r e s t e d ?

or human

o r t h e ability t o predict w h a t y o u r kids will l o o k like -

a g e s a n d (of c o u r s e )

increase the success of your children f o r centuries to c o m e . . . a n y gift t h a t c a n b e i m p a r t e d , s u c h a s b e a u t y ,

Then

visit w w w . r o n s a n g e l s . c o m .

Barely Legal

The Science

ly p e r m i s s i b l e i n m o s t U S s t a t e s . H o w e v e r , t h e l a u n c h

A l t h o u g h t h e site w o u l d b e i l l e g a l i n t h e U K , i t ' s entire-

o f t h e site h a s ( u n s u r p r i s i n g l y ) S o , p r i o r i t y o n e , w i l l it a c t u a l l y w o r k ?

\ â&#x20AC;&#x17E;

ajjj

W i l l this s m a l l

fortune actually guarantee you a child who'll be able

e-commerce

to carve out a career

a s k e d in C o n g r e s s . T h e l e a d i n g p o l i t i c a l s p o k e s m a n

in B a y w a t c h ?

Who'll

be the

o b j e c t o f desire f o r every oth er sixteen year-old o n the /

/ |

H ÂŤ~JBU,

o n the sub|ect (and a u t h o r of the only Federal regulat i o n s o n t h e fertility industry) R o n W y d e n , a D e m o c r a -

their G C S E ' s ?

E r . . . n o . A c c o r d i n g t o practically every

t i c S e n a t o r f r o m O r e g o n , c o m m e n t e d t h a t " t h i s is a

biologist q u e s t i o n e d o n the subject, o n e g o o d - l o o k i n g

t r o u b l i n g e x a m p l e o f h o w b i g b u c k s a n d flat-out c o m -

parent certainly won't p r o d u c e a stream of beautiful

mercialism d o m i n a t e a field where there are so many

children. Professor G e o r g e A n n a s o f Boston Universi-

vulnerable

ty p u t t h e m a t t e r

" l o o k i n g i n t o this o n e " .

bluntly, "It's l u d i c r o u s - n o kid' s

people"

Meanwhile,

before

Ron Harris'

p r o m i s i n g that

he'll b e

site h a s b e e n

attacked

will skip a g e n e r a t i o n a n y w a y " . B e s i d e s , a s a n y G C S E

f r o m all sides - S e a n T i p t o n , s p o k e s m a n f o r the A m e r -

b i o l o g y c o u r s e w i l l tell y o u , g e n e t i c s is d e p e n d a n t o n

ican Society for Reproductive M e d i c i n e , simply brand-

b o t h p a r e n t s a n d a hefty s l i c e of p r o b a b i l i t y - a s D r

e d the c o n c e p t " u n e t h i c a l a n d d i s t a s t e f u l " , whilst D r

George

C o n n o r R e e c e , c h a i r o f the cross party c o m m i t t e e o n

Hardacre,

f r o m t h e C a l i f o r n i a n Institute

is n o t that

simple". '

being

b e w o r k i n g t h e c a t w a l k b e f o r e they sit

G e n e t i c s , w a s swift t o p o i n t o u t , " N a t u r e

in t h e U S , with q u e s t i o n s a l r e a d y

block? Who'll

g o i n g t o l o o k like t h e m o d e l ' s p i c t u r e . . . o f t e n g e n e s 1

triggered a n urgent

review of the standards a n d regulations surrounding

m e d i c a l e t h i c s , w a s t r u l y d a m m i n g , d e e m i n g t h e site to b e " t h e worst p o s s i b l e e x a m p l e of the internet b e i n g

N o n e t h e l e s s , M r Harris sees the p r o c e s s a s " D a r -

used

for c l ! 'he w r o n g

win's n a t u r a l s e l e c t i o n a t it's very b e s t " . I n d e e d , h e ' s

been

the greatest

d e v e l o p e d his o w n very p e r s o n a l view o n e v o l u t i o n , " c h o o s i n g e g g s f r o m beautiful w o m e n will p r o f o u n d l y

become

reasons...what

should

have

scientific tool of the century h a s

a playground for money-grabbing

low-lifes

peddling dubious products a n d suspect theories".

Bidding Wars

bone

marrow to make

a fast b u c k - w e ' r e

talking

a b o u t s e l l i n g o f f t h e rights t o a c h i l d t h a t i s , b i o l o g i Despite

the negative

press,

Ronsangels

(named,

cally s p e a k i n g , 5 0 % yours. O f course, hundreds of

a c c o r d i n g t o M r Harris, in tribute t o l o w g r a d e 7 0 ' s

m e n d o n a t e to s p e r m b a n k s every day, a n d e g g d o n a -

cult series

tions a r e far f r o m u n c o m m o n (although t h e process

Charlie's Angels),

has nonetheless

done

a m a z i n g b u s i n e s s , r e g i s t e r i n g 1.1 m i l l i o n hits o n i t ' s

involves intensive g e n e therapy a n d c o m p l e x surgery),

first d a y a l o n e . O f t h e s e , m a n y w i l l s i m p l y b e v i s i t i n g

b u t t h o s e a r e (usually) a n o n y m o u s . A s w i t h a d o p t i o n ,

for shock

potential

t h e d o n o r c a n n e v e r k n o w t h e identity o f t h e i r o f f s p r i n g

value,

but nevertheless

enough

membership fee

- o r e v e n if t h e i r o f f e r i n g p r o d u c e d a c o n c e p t i o n -

(required before y o u c a n b i d , check o u t the d o n o r s o r

and so parenthood can remain a n unknown, respon-

f i n d o u t m o r e t h a n t h e b a r e m i n i m u m a b o u t t h e site)

s i b i l i t y - f r e e , q u a n t i t y . In this c a s e , h o w e v e r , t h e d o n o r

parents

stumped

up the $ 2 4 . 9 5

to p u s h a s k i n g prices w a y a b o v e their starting levels.

m u s t m e e t ( a n d a g r e e t e r m s with) t h e buyer, a n d w i l l

Indeed, even before the official l a u n c h o f the "serv-

forever b e a w a r e of the existence of their c h i l d , whilst

ice", M r Harris was offered $ 4 2 0 0 0 for the eggs of

t h e c o u p l e c o n c e r n e d w i l l live t h e k n o w l e d g e o f t h e

o n e o f t h e m o d e l s by a w o m a n

identity

simply identified as

Beth. S p e a k i n g in U S A Today, the 4 2 y e a r o l d T V p r o -

o f their

child's

true

parentage.

Will

they,

i n d e e d s h o u l d they, tell t h e i r c h i l d ? A n d w h a t h a p p e n s

ducer explained her reasoning, " T h e whole point of

if t h e c h i l d w a n t s t o g e t t o k n o w it's b i o l o g i c a l m o t h -

this is t o f i n d a n e g g d o n o r w h o l o o k s l i k e m e - t h a t

er?

way I might never h a v e t o explain the fact that I used

grips the U S , w h a t h a p p e n s w h e n o n e of the c h i l d r e n

s o m e o n e else's e g g s " .

d e c i d e s t o s u e that self-same m o t h e r f o r d e s e r t i o n . . .

Indeed,

in t h e litigation frenzy that

continually

But b a c k t o t h e first p o i n t - w h a t k i n d o f p e o p l e put their e g g s u p f o r s a l e ? O n e of the m o d e l s i n v o l v e d

Man or Monster?

in t h e s a l e , 2 6 y e a r o l d M i s t y M c F e r n ( w h o d e s c r i b e s h e r s e l f a s a s t r u g g l i n g actress) p u t it s i m p l y , " I ' d r a t h e r

R o n H a r r i s , t h e m a n r e s p o n s i b l e f o r t h e site h a s a p a s t

t h a t c o u l d b e d e s c r i b e d a s " c h e q u e r e d " a t best. A

m o r a l l y d u b i o u s , it's a difficult point to a r g u e , a n d , a s

one-time

she says "I've never e v e n h a d c h i c k e n p o x , m u m p s o r

p o r n o g r a p h e r , director, p h o t o g r a p h e r a n d

author, h e ' s best k n o w n f o r his p r e v i o u s venture

this t h a n

d o Playboy

or Penthouse".

Although

into

m e a s l e s . D o n ' t y o u t h i n k t h o s e a r e pretty g o o d g e n e s

c o m m e r c i a l b r e e d i n g - he used t o raise A r a b i a n hors-

t o p a s s a l o n g ? " M o r e o v e r , it c e r t a i n l y isn't t h e m o d e l s

es b e f o r e s e l l i n g t h e m o n f o r $ 2 0 0 0 0 a p i e c e . A s a

who

p h o t o g r a p h e r h e c l a i m s t o h a v e p r o d u c e d c o v e r art-

n e g o t i a t e contract s a n d d o c t o r s , a n d will k e e p all t h e

a r e t h e v i c t i m s - they g e t t o s e l e c t t h e w i n n e r ,

w o r k f o r V o g u e , Elle a n d C o s m o p o l i t a n , a n d h a s a

money for themselves

lengthy

2 0 % c o m m i s s i o n o n t o p o f the final fee). Indeed, t h e

career

with

Playboy

(for w h o he h a s a l s o

directed a series o f "artistic specials"). Ultimately,

he's a

classic

site w e l c o m e s

entrepreneur,

having

d a b b l e d in every field a s markets c h a n g e a n d m o n e y

you

(Harris c h a r g e s a n a d d i t i o n a l

applications from would-be donors -

just h a v e t o b e " y o u n g , b e a u t i f u l , h e a l t h y a n d

intelligent" to apply.

shifts. A p h o t o g r a p h e r i n t h e sixties h e b e c a m e a p u r veyor

of porn

in t h e seventies,

before

moving

into

exercise p r o g r a m m e s a n d v i d e o s in t h e health

con-

scious eighties. A final f l o u r i s h with the extreme

edge

of e - c o m m e r c e is t h u s e n t i r e l y i n c h a r a c t e r . . .

The Future In a l l p r o b a b i l i t y , t h e m a r k e t c e i l i n g will a l r e a d y

have

b e e n r e a c h e d by t h e t i m e y o u r e a d this, a n d b o t h H a r ris a n d his m o d e l s w i l l h a v e m a d e a tidy profi t f o r t h e i r

Parental Responsibility

e n d e a v o u r . B u t whilst they b e g i n t o p r e p a r e f o r t h e h a r r o w i n g p r o c e s s t h a t will l e a d t o t h e m f u l f i l i n g t h e i r e n d

F r o m t h e m o m e n t I h e a r d a b o u t t h e site f o r t h e first

of t h e b a r g a i n , h e w i l l b e p r e p a r i n g f o r next m o n t h s

time, t w o questions have flashed a r o u n d

a u c t i o n t o g o o n l i n e - this t i m e o f f e r i n g t h e s p e r m o f

my head.

Firstly, w h a t k i n d o f p e o p l e w o u l d w a n t t o e f f e c t i v e l y

m a l e m o d e l s (at c o n s i d e r a b l y l o w e r p r i c e s ) . M e a n w h i l e

buy

t h e U S G o v e r n m e n t will b e g i n t o r u s h t h r o u g h t h e l e g -

their child

(or, p e r h a p s

accurately,

their

c h i l d ' s p a r e n t ) i n this w a y . B u t t h e s e c o n d , a n d p e r -

i s l a t i o n that m a k e s t h e e n t i r e c o n c e p t i l l e g a l . A l l t h a t

h a p s m o r e i n t e r e s t i n g , p o i n t is w h a t k i n d o f p e o p l e

r e m a i n s t o b e s e e n is w h e t h e r o r n o t they c a n d o s o

w o u l d want to put themselves o n the market in such a

b e f o r e s o m e o n e m a t c h e s m o d e l e g g with m o d e l s p e r m

w a y ? A f t e r a l l , it's n o t like trying t o sell a k i d n e y o r

a n d creates their o w n DIY catwalk child...

reengineering the way you think

THE CITY & GUILDS COLLEGE UNION SECTION

Following a last minute mix up with IC's Medical Union, CGCU are back after only a fortnight...

Atlantis - C&G Freshers Dinner

amazing

ence

Carnival

no, games,

late

9th November 1999,

o f f e r . If a l l t h i s is n o t e n o u g h t o

three

superb

m e a l followed

course

fantastic

Friday

experi-

aquatic

with

entertain

by a

of dance, bar and

table

casi-

College

Union

will

such

also be

as pool a n d

t a b l e f o o t b a l l o n offer.

cinema.

The

A t l a n t i s is t h e r e s t y l e d C i t y & Guilds

y o u there

games

after

Annual

Carnival

will

the dinner

d i s c o with s o m e

start

soon

a n d feature of Imperial

Col-

F r e s h e r s e v e n t a n d is p o s s i b l y t h e

l e g e ' s p r e m i e r D J s . If t h e r e is o n e

most prestigious Freshers event at

event

Imperial

s u r e its t h i s o n e ! T i c k e t s c o s t £ 1 5

C o l l e g e . T h e event

will

be hosted o n 1 9th N o v e m b e r a n d

Tickets

are

n i g h t a w a y w i t h . Prizes a r e a w a r d -

now from Waterstones,

o t h e r d i n n e r , t h e e v e n t starts with

the

and

Freshers Dinner.

reception

where

given

the chance

peers

from

your

departments.

like a n y

students. this y e a r s e e s t h e i n t r o d u c t i o n o f

than

Much

attend

y o u will b e to meet

After

your

o w n a n d other

B u t t h i s is n o o r d i -

Dinner

Carnival

casino

includes

more - C G C U

h a s b e e n in e x i s t e n c e , t h e

students that h a v e g r a d u a t e d

from

annual

end

rent

generation

to the cur-

of C & G C o l l e g e

students if they c o u l d g e t t o k n o w the students that h a v e g o n e

please

through

highway, at g u i l d s @ i c . a c . u k .

Graduating

November.

it n o t b e a n

information

telephone

all the other

attractions o n

in person, v i a

extension

48073

the information

super-

The Director's Cut

to o l d s t u d e n t s . T h e h i g h l i g h t is the

working

Would

By Dinesh Ganesarajah, C G C U President

s u c h p r o v i d e s o p p o r t u n i t i e s t o link

g o n e o n to take prominent positions industry.

For

night s o that guests won't miss o u t

association of C & G C o l l e g e , a n d as

this s e c t i o n o f I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e h a v e

exceptional advantage

will b e s h o w i n g a

College

Society.

guests. T h e m o v i e will b e r u n a l l

Networking Buzz In t h e

City & G u i l d s

your

Union Departmental

as Blackjack

such

many

given some money to g a m b l e the

C & G College

E a c h guest will b e

classic games

feature

bar, at e x t r a o r d i n a r i l y l o w p r i c e s ,

that

the most

contact the C G C U

will

and

hat is N e t w o r k i n g ?

with

at the e n d . But there

available C C S shop

m a j o r b l o c k b u s t e r film free t o a l l

that

Roulette.

to the people

money

The Atlantis C a r n i v a l a

at the

n a r y d i n n e r . In a d d i t i o n t o a l a t e

time

make

for Freshers a n d £ 1 7 f o r all other

p r o m i s e s t o b e b i g g e r a n d better ever before.

you should

Reception,

Students

Tuesday 16t h

A i m e d at t h e o p p o s i t e

of the C & G C o l l e g e to Atlantis:

spectrum Freshers

Net-

Dinner,

student

The

the event

C & G is t h e

defining opportunity for graduating

elix is f r a n c h i s i n g o f f a p a g e

the

t h e i r stuff".

week

College

to the Constituent Unions

(CCUs).

come

would

c o m m u n i c a t i o n in I C S M S U , a n d

the Medics' appear

Social

some

R e p s , it

sort o f mis-

g limpse of s o m e of the things w e

the d y n a m i c ability o f G u i l d s m e n

d o . To the C C U , the strange by-

to p r o d u c e quality w o r k o n a 3 a m Thursday morning, hasmeant our

p r o d u c t is t h a t if t h e C C U is n o t doing

anything,

they

are

n o w early return.

in y o u r c h o s e n e n g i n e e r i n g industry

t a g e in t h e j o b m a r k e t . M o r e i n f o r -

f o r c e d t o d o s o m e t h i n g if t h e y a r e

can only a d v a n c e you towards your

mation

to i n c l u d e anything in their

career ambitions. The City & G u i l d s

Sherfield 3 0 1 .

Raiders O f The Lost Bus - Brighton

things

n o w have the c h a n c e to d i s c o v e r a

students t o n e t w o r k with f o r m e r s t u -

C o l l e g e A s s o c i a t i o n is t h e c o r p o r a t e

exciting

despite

fantastic o n e . To the reader, y o u

d e n t s in industry a n d g a i n a n a d v a n -

Adrian,

to "do

Unfortunately,

from

before

from

having

of the Medics

H a v e y o u n o t i c e d ? T h e i d e a is a

t h e m ? Attaining insight a n d contacts

is a v a i l a b l e

return

page,

p o i n t in

A t this i n s t a n t a n e o u s time, C G C U

is v e r y e v e n t s o r i e n -

a s m o n t h l y s t r e a m s o f " h e l l o - its us

tated. The reason?

B e c a u s e t h a t is

a g a i n ! " d o not b o d e well f o r the

all

on a

state o f t h e C C U . F o r t u n a t e l y f o r

l e v e l . I a m n o t i n t h e s l i g h t e s t bit

this C C U , C i t y & G u i l d s

College

w o r r i e d if a t this p h a s e in t h e y e a r

Union, we are now doing so much

the events a r e not entirely s u c c e s s -

a fortnightly section

i n Felix

people

notice

physical

I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e getting o n y o u r

motorised m a s c o t , B o , participates

that

I nerves? T h e w e e k e n d holiday to a

with

would

I far away

cars. O n c e there, the Brighton holi-

capacity

day

array of

currently involved in. U n f o r t u n a t e -

consistently

entertain-

ly, w e h a v e n o t b e e n g r a n t e d this

attention, for g o o d o r b a d , w e can

privilege.

unravel s o m e more exciting p r o d -

sive?

place

W e have

looking expenjust

t h e answer.

Raider s O f T h e Lost B u s is t h e f a n -

hundreds

resort

pubs,

piers

of other

offers

a vast

a n d other

pre

1904

tastic d a y e x c u r s i o n t o B r i g h t o n o n

m e n t s . T h e £ 5 b u s ticket (there is n o

S u n d a y 7 t h N o v e m b e r . T h e trip f o l -

cheaper

lows r o u n d t h e s t r e a m i n g r o u t e o f

can

the V e t e r a n C a r R u n , in w h i c h o u r

ston es a n d C C S S h o p .

return ticket t o Brighton)

b e b r o u g h t n o w f r o m Water-

n o t stretch

the writing

of t h e activities w e a r e

If y o u h a v e b e e n f o l l o w i n g this section

o f Felix

avidly,

y o u will

h a v e o p e n e d this i s s u e e x p e c t i n g

ful

- it is g o o d

enough

that w e

have events a n d p e o p l e are noticing these events. O n c e

C G C U is

demanding

public

ucts, i n c l u d i n g t h o s e that a r e n o t events

orientated,

which

b o u n d to bias the g o o d . . .

are

The State of the Union By Natasha Newton, Imperial College Union President

Aldwych There a r e 1 9 top Universities i n the country,

t h e Russell

called

- This Week's Union Meetings Monday 1st

group.

T h o s e Universities h a v e 1 9 U n i o n s , •

c a l l e d the A l d w y c h g r o u p . A l d w y c h w a s set u p t o fight f e e s . A s the t o p

Tuesday 2nd

U n i v e r s i t i e s w e a r e m o s t a t risk o f extra c h a r g e s (top u p fees)

degree.

•

because

p e o p l e will p a y extra f o r a

•

you are being

•

I m p e r i a l h a s b e e n p l a y i n g very fair,

ent?)

anything

but C a m b r i d g e

differ-

have h a d a

6 p m - Union Finance

7 p m - M e d School

w a n t t o m a k e it. has

been

and

there's

done

Lots

over

preparation

day. F o r the last t w o years the n u m -

the Summer

bers h a v e g o n e d o w n a n d d o w n a n d

2-3pm - Accommodation C o m -

n o w it l o o k s totally u n v i a b l e . BUT, I

Thursday 4th

places are being c h a r g e d for h a n d -

staff to h e l p y o u , w h a t w e d o n ' t h a v e

d i d n ' t think it w a s f a i r t o b i n it f o r y o u

•

outs o r e v e n to g o t o t h e i r o w n g r a d -

is s t u d e n t i n p u t . If

o n t h e b a s i s o f w h a t this y e a r ' s g u y s

uation!!

know what

increase

in Hall

rents,

some

a team

y o u think y o u

a Summer

Bal l

should

have d o n e . . . . s o

summer

Resource •

Final years c o m m e m o r a t i o n d a y Ball h a s

as c l o s e to £ 5 5 a s p o s s i b l e ) . D o y o u

•

6pm -R C C General

•

ULU M e d group

be a

o pe n for Union committees. H a v e a

The

l o o k o n the notice b o a r d outside the

b e e n a n a n n u a l event f o r years a n d

O c t o b e r ball for your year?

U D H . Most of them m e a n n o work

years.

around

o n y o u r p a r t , just a c h a n c e t o see the

a t t e n d e d a s p e o p l e c h o s e to say bye

Recently

it h a s b e e n

poorly

Centre

6 p m - I C U Exec,

think t h e r e

should then

late

inner workings o f I C U . S u m m e r Ball

bye t o their year g r o u p a t the S u m -

preferably

c h a i r is a s m u c h w o r k a s y o u w o u l d

m e r Ball rather than o n g r a d u a t i o n

address:

Resource

meeting

(Again

Friday 5th

£55.)

Answers

Clubs

meeting,

Centre

b a l l this a c a d e m i c y e a r (with tickets

Up for grabs

1 2 . 3 0 p m - Recreational C o m m i t t e e treasurers

this is h o w it

w o r k s . T h e r e will b e a n I C U

l o o k like, s i g n u p !

T h e r e a r e still a f e w ' e l e c t e d ' p l a c e s

Union

mittee, C l u b s C o m m i t t e e R o o m

of p e r m a n e n t

35%

commit-

Centre

Wednesday 3rd

the D P E & W , K e v i n Butcher. T h u s f a r

w e expect

meeting,

meeting

c h a r g e d extra c o m e a n d s e e m e o r

(would

Entertainments

Centre

tee, Resource

the l o o k u p f o r h i d d e n c o u r s e c o s t s . that

treasures

Resource

A s o n e o f t h e Presidents

y o u think

1 p m - Arts Board

better

w h i c h m a k e u p the g r o u p , I a m o n

B U S A Divisional meeting

on a

postcard

v i a email to the usual

president@ic.ac.uk.

•

T B A - R A G meeting,

farhad.cooper@ic.ac.uk

if y o u

are interested.

decisions

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10 Feedback

Felix â&#x20AC;˘ 1 November 1999

Point S o m e of y o u m a y h a v e n o t i c e d that

ture J i n Q u i n ' t r i is s e e k i n g t o s u p -

unsigned,

I w a s n ' t h e r e last w e e k . G i v i n g m y

press dissenting v o i c e s in the n a m e

are often more sensible than those

s o c i a l c o n s c i e n c e its a n n u a l o u t i n g ,

of ' T h e P e o p l e ' , in o r d e r t o e s t a b l i s h

of t h e e g o t i s t s w h o s i m p l y w i s h t o

I went up to C a m b r i d g e to deliver a

his o w n s u c c e s s i o n t o r u l e .

friendly r a p o n the k n u c k l e s the

of C h i n e se

price

take-aways.

H o w very w e l l t i m e d this a l l i s .

s e e t h e i r n a m e i n print. This c o l u m n

doubtless the replies t o my c o l u m n

is s u b j e c t t o t h e a p p r o v a l

would

of the

a n n o u n c e d a bill w h i c h will f i n a l l y

as a n y letter is. T h e Felix E d i t o r i s ,

insults - a n d t h a t g e t s us n o w h e r e

g i v e y o u t h e right n o t t o r e a d a n y

by t h e w a y , D a v i d R o b e r t s , n o t o u r

fast.

in p r i s o n , e v i d e n t l y

concerned mental

state. Slightly p e e v e d , I r e t u r n e d t o

files that C o l l e g e k e e p s o n y o u ; last

Minister of Culture, o r anyone

w e e k , the Foreign O f f i c e instructed

f o r that matter.

your

police

force

suppress in

Point h a s c o m e a b o u t a s a result o f

I'll k e e p r a k i n g t h e l a w n a n d r e v e a l -

d e s p e r a t i o n at the apath y s h o w n by

ing any hidden treasures I m a y find.

has

For

reading,

week, m e m b e r s of the U n i o n Exec-

your

Republic.

utive d e c i d e d t o u s e t h e i r i n f l u e n c e

great

to s u p p r e s s o p i n i o n s that

I m p e r i a l , a n d it s c a r e s m e t o t h i n k

the

benign

rule o f P r e s i d e n t

and

Hel'ad,

find m e

a n d last

h a s m o d e l l e d itself o n t h e P e o p l e ' s

Following

you'll

h e r e s h a r i n g this p a g e with K e v i n .

peaceful

protest

trade;

orders,

For those of y o u unsure, Break-

order

democratic

S o until t h e e d i t o r g i v e s m e m y marching

L o n d o n only to find that after yet

to protect

the d e b a t e , b u t m e r e l y b e p e r s o n a l

else

a n o t h e r constitutional rewrite, I C U

pleasant

not tackle t h e substance of

bobbies

for President J i a n g ' s fragile

the

is it s o i m p o r t a n t t o k n o w

Why

w h o B r e a k P o i n t is? If y o u d i d k n o w ,

m e brutally a n d l o c k e d

local

week,

here.

Felix Editor, i n e x a c t l y t h e s a m e w a y

the

Last

given

government

Naturally, repressed

about

a n d the opinions

differed

f r o m their o w n .

typical

IC student.

powers

it b e i n g

ICU

a n d influence

used

without

your

part,

I hope

y o u keep

a n d a i m to discover the

truth f o r y o u r s e l f .

open

O h , a n d by t h e w a y - f o r t h o s e

the c o m m u n i s t s h a v e i n s t a l l e d P r e s -

Let's m a k e it c l e a r : this c o l u m n

to run the People's

w ill r e m a i n a n o n y m o u s i n spite o f

cers t o a c c o u n t . S o B r e a k p o i n t a i m s

(Felix

pathetic bleating from

t o start that d e b a t e , i n t h e l e c t u r e

sense, I c o m m e n d y o u to read Tim

t h e a t r e s , in S o u t h s i d e a n d t h e s p o r t s

T r a i l o r ' s q u o t e o n last w e e k s f r o n t

ident

Ta'sha

U n i o n . (That's n o t t h e o n l y c o i n c i -

unaccount-

holding o u r 'elected'

d e n c e : in 1 9 9 7 , a largely success-

able

f u l , yet tiny c o l o n y w a s c o n s u m e d by

c a n n o t b e written. If p e o p l e k n e w I

fields.

its g i g a n t i c n e i g h b o u r a n d c h a n g e d

wrote

Street s i g n s t h e i r c o l u m n s ;

hacks. Without

to a n a d m i n i s t r a t i v e r e g i o n ) . N o w it

w o u l d s e e m that M i n i s t e r f o r C u l -

trash.

a n o n y m i t y , it

debate

B r e a k p o i n t , t h e y ' d e i t h e r tell

n o t h i n g , o r tell m e a l o a d o f Many

letters

ABSENTEE MASCOTRY

t o Felix a r e

N o leader

writer

offi-

in Fleet

of y o u w h o s a i d

m y first

column

1152) was made-up

non-

p a g e : "There's also a plan to ratio-

if y o u

nalise the sports g r o u n d s . That s u g -

d o n ' t a g r e e with t h e m , y o u e i t h e r

g e s t s that they p l a n t o sell T e d d i n g -

put u p o r shut u p . T h e s a m e a p p l i e s

ton". I thank you.

JACK HAMMER ATTACK

es s i m i l a r t o j a c k h a m m e r s d u r i n g t h e w e e k o f t h e tests.

Theta, currently the only violate C o n s t i t u e n t C o l -

Estates h a v e s t a t e d that they a r e k e e n t o k e e p

lege U n i o n m a s c o t at Imperial, d i d not attend al l

noise a n d disruption to a minimum during the

of t h e R o y a l C o l l e g e o f S c i e n c e F r e s h e r s d i n n e r s .

SCR

Kevin,

C h r i s t m a s , t o t h e e n d of J u n e . T h o s e r e s p o n s i b l e

h o p i n g to find intriguing stories of a n

i n g e n i o u s theft, c o v e r e d been

u p by t h e R C S U h a s

i n v e s t i g a t i n g . T h e b e s t e x c u s e t h e twenty

thousand

pounds worth of thermometer

polished.

Kevin

s e e s this a s a b o u t a s

p a t h e t i c a s : " S o r r y .. I c a n ' t c o m e , I'm d o i n g m y hair."

HARD TO C O M M E N T The

Senior

Common

Room

(SCR),

a n d sur-

r o u n d i n g a r e a s o n t h e first f l o o r o f S h e r f i e l d a r e

PRICE WAR HERE WE C O M E

after

are evidently a w a r e of fears of a repeat of the

The

d e b a c l e that a c c o m p a n i e d the Library extension

relocate

could

c o m e u p w i t h , w a s t h a t it w a s a w a y f r o m c o l l e g e getting

p r o j e c t , w h i c h will r u n f r o m d i r e c t l y

I C U run newsagents

o n the walkway

to the J C R temporarily from

will

January

d u r i n g t h e S C R w o r k s . S t u d e n t s a n d Staff w i l l b e

Mish Mash

f a c e d with a c h o i c e b e t w e e n Q T ' s , a n d t h e I C U outlet,

which

will

be situated

opposite

each

other. Kevin e n c o u r a g e s students to c h o o s e I C U , as

profits b e n e f i t

students,

rather

than

being

s w a l l o w e d by S h e r f i e l d . T h e U n i o n n e w s a g e n t s is of c o u r s e s u p e r i o r t o Q T : it w i l l r e m a i n t h e o n l y o n e with n e w s p a p e r s a n d m a g a z i n e s , a n d is a l s o cheaper crisps.

o n standard "'.iiSMWSl<

lines s u c h a s drinks a n d i

A Mostly Harmless Column by Kevin, a random entity who knows nothing about nothing

THE MILLENNIUM HAMSTER

thinks h e m a y h a v e a n e x p l a n a t i o n , other t h a n

w h i c h r e s u l t e d i n s t u d e n t s t a k i n g e x a m s i n a tent

The huge M i l l e n n i u m W h e e l o n the bank of the

typical IC apathy. A t t h e time o f writing

o u t s i d e S o u t h s i d e a n d h a v e s t a t e d that " s t u d e n t s

Thames

should not fear noise during exams".

K e v i n w a s d i s a p p o i n t e d t o l e a r n that

to b e r e f u r b i s h e d . E s t a t e s h a s e x p r e s s e d c o n c e r n at t h e l a c k o f c o m m e n t s o n t h e p l a n s t h a t t h e y have

received

from

staff

a n d students.

Kevin

n o t i c e s that e - m a i l s t o s c r c o m m e n t s @ i c . a c . u k , the a d d r e s s t o w h i c h c o m m e n t s w e r e i n v i t e d , a r e bouncing.

www.ad.ic.ac.uk/estates, yet t h e p a g e a w a i t i n g t h e a p p r o p r i a t e link.

have evidence

to back up

t h e i r s t a t e m e n t s c o n t r a c t o r s with j a c k

A r e c e n t a r t i c l e i n staff n e w s l e t t e r I C D i s t o r t e r al s o stated that details c o u l d b e v i e w e d

To e n s u r e they

from

is still

hammers

h a v e b e e n d r i l l i n g into w a l l s a r o u n d S h e r f i e l d t o

is n o w v i s i b l e f r o m

parts

of college.

h u g e M i l l e n n i u m H a m s t e r that will b e evidently b e r e q u i r e d t o p o w e r it.

s e e t h e effect o n t h e G r e a t H a l l . K e v i n w a s n o t e n c o u r a g e d by t h e f a c t l e c t u r e s i n t h e R e e d a n d P i p p a r d Lecture Theatres w e r e d i s r u p t e d by n o i s -

Imperial

Biologists are not involved in the creation of the

To comment or contribute: http://come.to/mishmash

7 1M !

^www«mckinseyxom^^www«mckinseyxo,uk)^Lngrad_rec@mckinseyxomJ-

Felix

Feedback A RETURN F R O M THE G R A V E

judgement

o n the latter

point,

b e y o n d saying that I always, w i t h Dear

Dave,

out e x c e p t i o n , used my c o l u m n to savage

H a v i n g b e c o m e a little f i d g e t y in

my self-imposed

felt it w a s t i m e

Editor. Deputy

David Rooer*s .Mane Nicholnou (Reviews) ... Joel Lewis (Layout)

Assi

'penneth

Andrew Ofori

l-'hi .togropy. :

retirement,

my t w o

to the Imperial

throng.

Lewis, Gus Paul, Dave Edwc ds, r

as t o p r o v o k e a n y sort o f r e s p o n s e in

however,

n o w that y o u d o N O T , u n d e r a n y

this a p a t h e t i c university must

t h a t this y e a r ' s c o l u m n s a r e g e n e r -

circumstances, attack I C U o n spe-

h e is d o i n g s o m e t h i n g right!!!

ating a few problems. O f course,

cific, issues unless y o u r facts a r e s o

that's

irrefutably

It d o e s

there

seem,

role,

but there

are

Quantrell's

point

with

about

leading, I suspect, to

columnist f o r the previous

four years, I w o u l d never with

the protection

Had

Mason,

home

www.su.ic.acuk/Felix. felix(a)ic.ac.uk

Felix s p r o d u c e d f o r a n d o n behalf of Imperial C o l l e g e

watertight

Rumpole

together

would

that

and

give

rather than

Perry

People

mean

c o m p l a i n that h e slags

off their c o u r s e ,

but f r o m

what I

Kavanagh

r e m e m b e r ( c o n s i d e r i n g I'm a n idiot,

up a n d g o

w i t h o u t a n y b a c k issues o f Felix) h e

challenge you.

A n y less t h a n this p o s i t i o n

makes

h a s c o m m e n t e d a b o u t m a n y different d i s c i p l i n e s .

A l s o , if p e o p l e a r e

f o r a v e r y t e d i o u s letters p a g e . A

really stressed with w h a t h e h a s writ-

broadbrush,

t e n , w h y d o n ' t they write directly to

but

factual,

disagree

a p p r o a c h will b e m u c h m o r e s u c -

him?

sources.

cessful,

the

that they d o n ' t a c t u a l l y r e a d his Em a i l a d d r e s s a t t h e b o t t o m o f the

concentrating

O r a r e they b e i n g t o o s t u p i d

mine, the

grossly inefficient b u r e a u c r a c y that

Voice of Reason w o u l d never have

c h o k e s I C U driven by the m i s g u i d -

page.

lasted

a s it d i d . D e s p i t e

ed a i m of ' b e i n g inclusive', which

this there s o that p e o p l e c a n c o n t a c t

hunts

him?

not protected

witch-

McCarthy

m e a n s a l l o w i n g e v e r y o n e t o sit o n

w o u l d h a v e b e e n p r o u d , t h e y still

o n e of a thousand pointless c o m -

don't

mittees that only survive

which

know

is/are,

Joe

who

he/she/it/they

s o it's n o t a

p r o b l e m if

of t h e u n p a i d

status

y o u ' r e c a r e f u l . H o w e v e r , t h a t is a

their

totally

souls than myself h a v e

different

issue

the

of authors. You are, I

members.

that

exactly

would

irrevocably

ability

of the writers

damage

if t h e i r

the

collect

identity w a s

becuase

of most of

Less

Sir J o h n

a t t e n d e d s o m e physics lectures (as I

is n o t

s i o n that K e v i n is a c t u a l l y t h e Rector.

is t o h a v e w r i t e

letters t o

Felix every w e e k . I w o u l d point ou t that there's a

being widely k n o w n . O v e r the four

rial f o r c o l u m n i s t s a n d p r o b l e m s

years

I w a s in t h e c h a i r ,

have

been

that

f o r t h e rest o f I C . Y o u m a y h a v e

TEFFH

hun-

h e a r d o f it, B r e a k p o i n t ?

(A s e c o n d y e a r entity)

It's n e a r

the S h e r f i e l d

B u i l d i n g . Its m a c h i -

W i t h o u t a n a m e a n d that d e l i g h t -

nations always use to the bane of

ful

all

have

been

stuffed. There a r e only two scenarauthor

anonymity

o u r lives,

and I

they've c h a n g e d m u c h . They be

thinking

it's C h r i s t m a s

must come

early, s o w h y n o t , in t h e m o d i f i e d

life o r p l a c e

words

at C o l l e g e w e r e in

in w h i c h

case

write

inside

Harry

t h e tent

Truman,

Dear Dave,

doubt

w o u l d b e j u s t i f i e d : if t h e a u t h o r ' s

jeopardy,

intended!

must

tion,

in which

f a c e v a l u e , t h e w a y I think that its

the Q u e e n ' s Tower a n d it's c a l l e d

ios

a n d jump to conclu-

s i o n s , r a t h e r t h a n t a k e t h e c o l u m n at

dreds of p e o p l e , offering i n f o r m a -

I would

But w o u l d I really like t o j o i n t h e rest of the g a n g

seems to generate plenty of m a t e -

suggestions f o r articles etc.

This

m e n t f r o n t , s o t h e last t h i n g s h e needs

small department o n campu s

photo,

r e m e m b e r ) , a n d this t e r m h e is sitting in m e d i c a l lectures - h m m m .

c o u l d t h e r e f o r e l e a d t o the c o n c l u -

identity

approached

I say this, b e c a u s e last t e r m h e

manage-

umn

without one's

n i n g h i m d o w n t o o n e p l a c e must b e

suggested

b l e t o d o a g o o d j o b in t h e c o l game

A s t o f i n d i n g o u t w h o m K e v i n is, I think will b e r a t h e r difficult, a s p i n -

hard!

Harvey-Jones

the o r g a n i s a t i o n a l

N o w c a l l m e f o o l i s h , but is

charitable

o u r n e w President

fear, quite w r o n g t o s u g g e s t that 'it

r i e n c e s s u g g e s t t h a t it is i m p o s s i -

E-mail:

I've

r e a d his c o l u m n s i n c e it started last

v o k e d e m o t i o n . G o o d o n h i m s a y I,

k n o w n . ' O n the contrary, my e x p e -

URL:

h a v e with K e v i n .

patronising

t i c u l a r . Y o u s h o u l d h a v e l e a r n t by

information

Felix, The Portacabins, Prince Consort RcL London' SW7 2BB

risk o f s o u n d i n g

lem people

over

anonymity

;

O k , s o w h a t exactly is the p r o b -

S e c o n d l y , I f e e l it n e c e s s a r y , a t

g o f r o m strength to strength

Nicholaoj, Andy Ofori. Dinesh

Felix.

the

D e a r Felix ( a n d Kevin),

t e r m , a n d y e s , I h a v e t o a d m i t , it p r o -

s o m e c o n f u s i o n , in your editorial.

letter

( m o i ? ) , t o o f f e r a little a d v i c e t o

anonymity,

Russeli Cummei

of any

the c o l u m n i s t s , B r e a k p o i n t in p a r -

Firstly, I m u s t f u l l y a g r e e

Books

credibility article

Felix this y e a r s e e m s to h a v e start-

John â&#x20AC;˘ â&#x20AC;˘

the

anonymous

ed well a n d will, I a m confident,

p r o b l e m s a n d there a r e p r o b l e m s .

V-

to offer

the year.

News

ANONYMITY : THE DEBATE C O N T I N U E S

medics tend to get a b a d

press a n d I think that w e a r e n o t g i v e n e n o u g h credit. W e r e it n o t f o r

come

us, Felix w o u l d h a v e a lot o f e m p t y

pissing

space a n d a dwindling numbers of

the other w a y

r e a d e r s . A f t e r a l l , w e t e n d to f eatu re

a n d start

e l s e w h e r e i n F e l i x , o r if t h e c o l u m n

out,

printed a t M C P Litho Limited,

w e r e s o execrably awful that the

r o u n d , as y o u have d o n e

Units B 2 & B 3 , H a t t o n S q u a r e ,

a u t h o r d i d not h a v e the guts t o put

lessly t o d a t e .

lot e a s i e r t o g r a b p e o p l e ' s interest by

All t h e best,

a r o u s e a lot o f p a s s i o n ) t h a n it is to

Union Media Group and i s :

16 - 1 6 a Baldwins

Gardens,

L o n d o n f . C I N 7RJ

rather

than

his o r h e r n a m e t o it. T h e f o r m e r certainly h a s n ' t a p p l i e d at I C , a n d it is p r o b a b l y

better

if I

reserve

relent-

p r o m i n e n t l y i n e v e r y issue a n d it is a

l a y i n g into t h e m e d i c s (as w e t e n d t o

Simon

Baker

u n d e r t a k e d e c e n t , investigative jour-

Felix The deadline for letters intended for publication is Wednesday 12 noon - drop into the portacabins or email felix@ic.ac.uk. Letters may be edited for length but not g r a m m a r or spelling.

n a l i s m in a n a t t e m p t to write well-

WATERSTONES. A H E M .

b a l a n c e d informative pieces. Y o u refuse to n a m e the writer of B r e a k P o i n t b e c a u s e " n o self-respect-

Dear

Dave,

ing E d i t o r . . . w o u l d d e l i b e r a t e l y r e v e a l the

identity

anonymous

s o u r c e . . . a s it w o u l d i r r e v o c a b l y d a m -

This w e e k ,

I found

myself

n e e d of a textbook. Despite

there

a g e the ability o f t h e writers t o c o l l e c t

being

O h d e a r , t h e E d i t o r is h i g h l y t

sections

information

was

Waterstones located on campus, I

the

are to be f o u n d . Y o u c a n

hardly

find buying textbooks a frustrating

t o v.

pii k u p d e c e n t ( f j ' s fot a b o u t â&#x201A;Ź 3

and

this h i g h l y a n o n y m o u s g u e s t <

d u e to the b l a n k e t p r i c i n g policy.

known". MI5.

Oh,

I'm

their come

identity o n . Its

sure y o u r ' b l o w i n g

their

"convenient"

tiresome

branch

experience.

Why?

c o v e r ' will not result in t h e m b e i n g

Because

captured

W a t e r s t o n e s d o n o t s t o c k the b o o k s

and

tortured

with

pliers

often

than

not,

until they r e v e a l g o v e r n m e n t secrets.

I r e q u i r e - t h e r e is n o t h i n g p e c u l i a r

I a s s u r e y o u that w e w o n ' t s e n d the

a b o u t t h e s e b o o k s ; i n d e e d they a r e

h e a v i e s to d o t h e m over. W e

would

moment,

finishing

.vlnch leaves me

torial.

1 hat

Howevet

the

true

bargains usually

it v a r i e s f r o m o n e

shop

to a n o t h e r a n d I h a v e p e r s o n a l l y VHAT'S A N EDITOPIAI I

picked up "The [)( c " for o n l y

C u l t of A n t '

and

., as!

t o p o n m y d e p a r t m e n t ' s list of p r e -

N o r m a l l y a n e d i t o r i a l is a c h t i

Videos

just like to see w h i c h p a t h e t i c little

scribed

t o r e f l e c t u p o n t f i o s e i s s u e s rai

this is a g o o d p l a c e t o p i c k u p a l l

c r e a t u r e it is that g o e s r o u n d

m a n y years. M o r e o v e r , ordering a

w i t h i n t h e p a g e s of t h e

book from Waterstones only

t i o n a n d use i h i s p o s i t i o n of p

ped-

d l i n g half-truths a n d p r o p a g a n d a . I s e e m to recall that M i s h - M a s h was

once

accompanied

some

w e i r d l o o k i n g kid with g l a s s e s .

Who

texts a n d

have

been

for

adds

sions

previously,

it t o o k

over

I could

talk

about

variety

is h e ? I a s s u m e h e is not a m e d i c s o

copy of a well-known a n d popular

C o l l i qi

w h y is h e at C h a r i n g C r o s s f o r l e c -

textbook.

just f r o m t h e letters p a g e .

of us b o t h e r g o i n g . I

f i n d his c o n d e s c e n d i n g t o n e t o

The old ICU book-shop ' g u a r anteed

to stock

textbook

â&#x20AC;˘< ' tt r s t o n e s ,

dm' Howev-

er I a m instead g o i n g to u s e this

W i t h the re-release of The

a u g u s t platform for the other e d i -

Blair

p r e s c r i b e d by a l l a c a d e m i c d e p a r t -

t o r i a l right. That

such

ments

about those

'rowdy

annoying. The

wannabe

doctors'

vast majority

Imperial,

and

what

available

things close to

CD/video

near

A R E g o i n g to b e d o c t o r s . I t a k e it that

"trendy"

verters a n d h o r r o r films.

Rolling

has s o m e

which

case

future

plans too,

must

snide

w a n n a b e s o m e t h i n g - o r -other.

his w o r d

in trying t o

keep

sale of T e d d i n g t o n . H y b r i d entry entry

if it c o m e s

essential a s o t h e r w i s e w e

"The

patronising

- a

Joint-

(or

that) will

attempt

end

private

enterprise

campus,

wholeheartedly

recommend

Carpenter's

Vampires

(despite

the

lukewarm

review

shopper

they

b o y c o t t F r e n c h f o o d in

would response

after

reliable a n d

opening, not

been

efficient Two

Waterstones

learned

from

m i s t a k e s , a n d c o n t i n u e to

their

provide

a second-rate service.

world

without

roquefort

the

multitude

(ignore

goat's

though)

cheese

G e o f f H e w i c k ( C o m p u t i n g 4)

beef.

that

y o u truly

A N D FINALLY... D e a r Sir,

sell f o r m a n y , m a n y t i m e s w h a t w e d i s t u r b e d to n o t i c e t h a t ,

a s yet, y o u d o n o t s e e m t o

have

sports t e a m s at C o b h a m as G K T a r e

published a single article p r o m o t -

leaving. Therefore, we

ing

use

m o m e n t then

sell

the

legalisation

you

ce"

and

c u t in t w o

James

Wood's

ble "truck/stake g u n " . This

Now, THE

END

sics s u c h as d o l c e l a t t e , c a m b a z o -

A h h , still s p a c e t o w r

finished

and

gorgonzola

but

blue liking.

choice.

It h a s

I personally will not n o w be s h o p -

than

it s h o u l d

p i n g at B u d g e n s

(and

it's not

or Somerfields,

so w e ' l l see h o w they like that!

threi taken do

v e r y g<

congratulations go

cannabis.

B a s e d o n t h e c o n t e n t of

H a r l i n g t o n , k e e p T e d d i n g t o n , get a

years I h a d

n e w Sports C e n t r e a n d all m o v e to

l e g a l i s a t i o n w a s a k e y Felix p o l i c y .

Cobham.

Have I been misinformed?

come

What

a n alternative to a brie & t o m a t o

c h e e s e is n o t t o e v e r y o n e ' s I am

time).

g a p c a n b e f i l l e d by I t a l i a n c l a s -

a c r e s in a perfect d e v e l o p m e n t s p o t

all

the

French

t o a c e r t a i n e x t e n t t h e soft c h e e s e

should

lexas of

imagine

H a r l i n g t o n will b e c o m p l e t e , f r e e i n g

ICSM

(one

fantastic " m a n

b a g u e t t e at c e r t a i n t i m e s ?

w o u l d get f o r T e d d i n g t o n . T h e r e

txorcist

Massacre

be w a t c h i n g V a m pi r e s for

rank

In 5 y e a r s the g r a v e l e x t r a c t i o n at

lucrative

camembert,

other cheeses

brethren. C a n

C e n t r e , c a n I p r o p o s e a n alternative.

brie,

gleefully import f r o m o u r

Sports

f o r H e a t h r o w T e r m i n a l Five. This will

saw

still

" t y p i c a l " British

asked whether

h o w c o u l d they. I m e a n i m a g i n e a

have

s a l e of T e d d i n g t o n will

was

isturbing - but not scary -

had

years

G i v e n that the p r o c e e d s of the

W a t c h i n g t h e n e w s o n t h e T V last

T h e y r e p l i e d that they w o u l d - but

Book-shop, which

remind B U S A about "sport for all"?

to believe

BARGAINS

that

E v e r y o n e ' s a winner.

; I'll f i n i s h o f f by s a y i n g t h a t are p r o b a b l y experienced

Yours, Kash Akhtar,

ICU

m a k e the cut kick t h e i r h e e l s . C a n I

reserves f o r the

pirate

horror

t o their b a n n i n g of British

providing a

r o o m e n o u g h for all IC a n d

you)

m a n y t h o u g h t it c r a s s t o s c r a p t h e

s e r v i c e to s t u d e n t s f o r y e a r s .

up g o d k n o w s h o w m a n y

o n c e a g a i n at the c i n e m a . N o w , I can

CHEESE

night a

W h i l s t t h e r e is m u c h s c o p e f o r

with a f e w elite t e a m s p l a y i n g o n a

'secret'

Con-

John

woo

given college's zero-tolerance p o l -

W e d n e s d a y whilst t h o s e w h o d o not

insufficient to h e l p f u n d the

Cash

pathetic

icy t o w a r d s d r u g s .

B U S A h y b r i d entry a n d t o p r e v e n t the

dual

and

cheese,

(currently

DVD

students, a n d highly i n a p p r o p r i a t e ,

I a m g l a d that T i m T r a i l o r is sticking to

and

novels

Handbook"

Project

own

heart,

Witch

of w i b b l i n g

Waters ton e s offer? A mish-mash of

Exor-

cist a n d t h e h y p e s u r r o u n d i n g t h e

highly irritating a n d his use o f w o r d s as

and;:

t o the frustration, a n d on two o c c a -

things: m e d i c s , sports, anonymity,

None

similarly priced

publi

m o n t h f o r t h e m to o b t a i n a s i n g l e

tures?

are

Anon

4th year M e d i c i n e

delights of

the this c h a i n

awesome of

shops.

T h e s e stores a r e h e a v e n f o r those looking for electronical bargains. The prices for TV's, videos,

All complaints should be addressed to the Editor. If no satisfactory reply is received, contact ICU Exec via the Union President

Hi-Fi

e q u i p m e n t a n d c o m p u t e r s are all O K b u t it is i n t h e v i d e o a n d

impor-

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i C V IMPkRIAI. COl.LI'Xili UNION

IT'S YOUR UNION - BE PART OF IT

r z

y l

e s r

n d t

s g

i s t n C g

frequency / \ N

R i g h t , first o f a l l s t o p r e a d ing

this

column

and

sort

y o u r s e l f o u t a n entry in t h e D e a t h in V e g a s c o m p e t i t i o n detailed

opposite.

And do

the

column

you've

Gabrielle Rise (WEA)

This is the d e b u t a l b u m f r o m 2 9 - y e a r - o l d s o u l s i n g e r M a c y G r a y , currently

This is G a b r i e l l e ' s third a l b u m a n d d e f i -

it n o w .

Yes, n o w . N O W .

Okay,

Macy Gray On How Life Is (Epic)

done

A m e r i c a ' s "hottest s e n s a t i o n " , who's b e g i n n i n g t o replicate the attention o v e r

nitely h e r best. W h i l s t t h e first a l b u m c o n -

it, s o

here a n d t h r o u g h o u t E u r o p e . H e r u n u s u a l v o i c e h a s mostly b e e n c o m p a r e d

t a i n e d s u c h 'gems' as D r e a m s a n d the s e c -

tunes.

to Billie H o l i d a y , but that i m p l i e s it t o b e rather o l d - f a s h i o n e d . In truth, there

o n d c o n t a i n e d n o t h i n g m e m o r a b l e at a l l ,

S t a r t i n g this w e e k ' s m u s i c is

is a l s o t h e s o u n d of s o m e o n e like T i n a Turner in h e r '60's heyday. G r a y refus-

it c o u l d n e v e r b e s a i d that h e r v o i c e w a s

n o w let's chat a b o u t

d u o of w o n d e r f u l

divas,

es t o b e p i g e o n h o l e d but if p u s h i n g stupid birds into s m a l l o p e n i n g s is y o u r

anything

and Macy

Gray.

t h i n g then h e r m u s i c w o u l d best b e d e s c r i b e d as r a w s o u l with l a r g e c h u n k s

a l b u m finally sees h e r m a t u r e into the style

T h e n after s o m e

Charlatans

of h i p - h o p , r o c k , r ' h b a n d f u n k t h r o w n i n . In short, a n eclectic c o n c o c t i o n

that suits h e r v o i c e best. T h a t style is a

action,

a chat to

of beats a n d m e l o d i e s .

voice-driven crossover between soul a n d

a n d there's that c o m p e t i t i o n

B o r n with a v o i c e that s u g g e s t e d she w a s the offspring of Tricky a n d M a r g e

o n this r e c o r d .

(you

S i m p s o n , s h e rarely s p o k e f o r f e a r o f b e i n g t e a s e d . It w a s only after m o v i n g

a l b u m s G a b r i e l l e seems to have under-

to Los A n g e l e s to join a film s c h o o l that s h e b e g a n s o n g w r i t i n g with friends.

gone

W h e n singers f o r h e r s o n g s didn't a p p e a r s h e w a s reluctantly r o p e d i n . .

c h a n g e in style o f e a c h . S h e h a s m o v e d

M u s i c i a n s h e a r i n g the t a p e w e r e t a k e n by h e r u n i q u e s i n g i n g v o i c e : e q u a l

f r o m the e y e p a t c h e d r e c o r d c o m p a n y driv-

Gabrielle

Tim

we have

from

Death

have

entered

you?)

... frequency... ... music for you... After the adverts w e ' r e

than

excellent.

T h e third

p o p a n d w o r k s well f o r m o s t o f the tracks

Vegas

haven't

less

three

hard

A l o n g with these

image

changes

woman

three

t o suit the

parts scat, r a p a n d sweet s o u l . S h e w a s s n a p p e d u p by E pi c early last y e a r

a n d w a s g i v e n the u n i q u e o p p o r t u n i t y of g o i n g o n n a t i o n w i d e tours b e f o r e

t h r o u g h relative 'normality' ( = uninspiring)

needing

gimmicks,

the r e l e a s e o f a n y r e c o r d i n g s .

to w h e r e s h e is n o w . T h a t p l a c e is t h e very b i g h a i r e d s o u l q u e e n l o o k that l o o k s as if

back

it's m o d e l l e d o n D i a n a Ross

with a s p l a s h o f s i n g l e s , a

W e l l , that's a n i c e fairy tale story f o l l o w i n g the u s u a l rags-to-riches m o u l d ,

q u i c k EP a n d t h e n t h e r e ' s t h e

but is h e r a l b u m m u c h c o p ? First track W h y Didn't Y o u C a l l M e sets t h e s c e n e

first i n s t a l l m e n t o f J a z z i n f r e -

nicely - a p l e a d i n g s o u l / r o c k v o c a l with lush h a r m o n i e s in the b a c k i n g v o c a l s

O n e o f the m a i n p r o b l e m s with this a l b u m

quency - a n d a b o u t time t o o

( p r o v i d e d by G r a y herself) o v e r funky h i p - h o p beats . W h i l s t the lyrics hint at

is that there is n o t h i n g t o p i c k o u t lyrically

( b l a m e m e f o r this). A n y w a y ,

d e s p e r a t i o n , there's a g e n e r a l g o o d v i b e r u n n i n g t h r o u g h this s o n g . S h e turns

between

following

we'll

as funky as J a m e s B r o w n o n the h u g e S e x - O - M a t i c V e n u s Freak, spitting o u t

s e e m t o b e 'we're in l o v e , it's perfect' a n d

out

h e r lustful w o r d s like a d i s g r u n t l e d Shirley Bassey. G i v e n that she c l a i m s a l l

'we w e r e in love but n o w we're not a n d it's

specialised

her lyrics a r e b a s e d o n p e r s o n a l e x p e r i e n c e s , the track I've C o m m i t t e d M u r -

y o u r fault . W h i l e t h e s e

your

d e r - a b o u t killing h e r boyfriend's boss a s r e v e n g e f o r firing h i m - is m o r e

p l a c e in the song-writing w o r l d they c a n

this c o l u m n

hopefully some

sorting

other

music

columns

for

the tracks - the t w o v ar i at i on s

r e a d i n g p l e a s u r e in t h e n o t

t h a n a bit w o r r y i n g . U n d o u b t e d l y the a l b u m ' s h ig h lig h t, however, is h e r

be, a n d many

too

distant

the

b r e a k t h r o u g h s i n g l e I Try. Its steady c l i m b into the U K T o p Ten p r o v e s the

m o r e i n s pi ri n g t h a n the lyrics f o u n d here.

way,

does

want to

song's lasting a p p e a l . Its style is rather different to o t h e r tracks o n O n H o w

However,

write

about

Life Is, p e r h a p s b e c a u s e it is o n e o f the f e w s o n g s w h e r e G r a y w r o t e the

drag

m u s i c a s well a s the lyrics. P e r f o r m e d in the m a n n e r of a 7 0 ' s starlet, I Try

t h e m t o w a r d s a h eig ht w h e r e y o u c a n just

swells a n d s c r a m b l e s its w a y t o a r i p- r o a r i n g c h o r u s , G r a y battling b e t w e e n

a b o u t let their c r o s s n e s s slide.

future. anyone indie

metal

maybe even folk music?

A s w e l l a s o u r b i g D e a t h in

h e r t w o v o c a l tracks as if the g o o d a n d evil in h e r m i n d a r e bot h trying to

Vegas b l a g , the other

m a k e themselves h e a r d .

great

times

m a y h a v e their

have been,

Gabrielle's voice

them

from

much

manages

awfulness

a n d propel

W h i l e there is n o t h i n g really o u t s t a n d i n g o n this a l b u m the o v e r a l l quality is g o o d .

e v e n t i n this w e e k ' s f r e q u e n cy is a p o e m in o u r c l u b b i n g

If t h e a l b u m h a d a b a d p o i n t it w o u l d b e that, while e a c h track c o m b i n e s a

Unfortunately

s e c t i o n . A s c e p t i c d o u b t e d its

variety o f styles there is not e n o u g h di f f e r e n c e b e t w e e n the a c t u a l s o n g s . But

r e c o r d s s u c h a s that f r o m M a c y G r a y it just

o r i g i n , b u t h e y I'm a b e l i e v e r

as a d e b u t a l b u m , it is m o r e t h a n sufficient a n d hints at a bright future.

can't h o l d its a p p e a l a n d is easily e c l i p s e d .

never

m i n d a n y of that

and read o n . . .

Ryetar

when

compared

to other

Tim

frequency / \ N

Death in Vegas Interview-A Chat With Tim

The Charlatans Us and Us Only (Universal)

D e a t h in Veg as's recent a l b u m , T h e C o n t i n o S e s s i o n s , w a s a d e l i c i o u s

Massive Competition! 10 tickets, 10 t-shirts, beer + a whole lot more

m i x e d b a g of surprises. T h e i r a s s o c i a t i o n with the H e a v e n l y l a b e l a n d c l u b nights w o u l d p r o b a b l y l e a d o n e t o expect a nice p o p p y a l b u m full o f

Q u i t e h o w this h a s h a p p e n e d n o o n e is

Stories

d a n c e y tracks a n d a real feel g o o d factor. O n listening t h o u g h , T h e C o n -

s u r e , b u t s o m e h o w this w e e k w e ' v e m a n -

a l b u m . Th e C h a r l a t a n s are sur-

t i n o S e s s i o n s is f a r f r o m a p o p r e c o r d , T i m f r o m the b a n d e x p l a i n e d w h e n

aged

prisingly the o n l y real survivors o f

Felix writer B o y c e y h a d a q u i c k c h a t with h i m last w e e k . . .

Music.

Us and Us Only to

is the f o l l o w u p

Telliri

t h e excellent

the

Manchester

scene

included the Stone the

Happy

some

(which

Roses a n d

Mondays),

some-

o u r biggest

Boycey:

S o what's all this H e v e a n l y S o c i a l , bi g b e a t stuff a b o u t ?

It s e e m s

to m e that y o u b o y s h a v e m o r e t h a n just a f e w m u s i c a l s o u n d s i n f l u e n c i n g

blag

ever

at Felix

I s u p p o s e s o m e m i g h t c a l l it l u c k , m i g h t c a l l it f a t e a n d s o m e m a y

e v e n s u g g e s t t h a i it's a l i e .

B u t it's n o t

a n d it's g r e a t .

Please e x p l a i n .

thing that is reflected in t h e c o n -

y o u r beats .

f i d e n c e o f the a l b u m ' s title.

Tim: T h e H e a v e n l y S o c i a l w a s n e v e r a b o u t bi g b e a t m u s i c . T h e m u s i c p o l -

The winner get's

icy w a s t o play g o o d m u s i c o f a n y g e n r e a s l o n g a s it w a s g o o d .

There

D e a t h in V e g a s o n t h e 7 t h N o v e m b e r at

T h o s e c l u b nights w e r e

S h e p h e r d ' s B u s h E m p i r e , t e n f re e T-shirts

W h i l e a n u m b e r of the songs,

was house, r a p , soul, indie, absolutely anything.

Home

brilliant. S o m e o f t h e DJs at the B i g Beat B o u t i q u e c l u b in Brighton h a d a

quite strongly recall their e a r l i e r

s i m i l a r p o l i c y s o I s u p p o s e that w a s w h e r e the a s s o c i a t i o n started. B i g b e a t

m a t e r i a l (in this c a s e t h e c o u n t r y

m u s i c is m u s i c b y n u m b e r s t h o u g h .

rock o f North

other. A n y o n e c o u l d m a k e a n o k a y b i g b e a t track with a f e w h o u r s o n a

Is Not A

like A H o u s e

Country

is n o t necessarily thing.

Indeed,

Boy), this

such a b a d

there

are also

m o r e b o l d , e x p e r i m e n t a l tracks

g o o d computer.

Pretty m u c h in o n e e a r a n d o u t the

W i t h D e a t h in V e g a s , myself a n d R i c h a r d try to d o quite

a bit m o r e . W e trying t o m a k e m u s i c that p u s h e s b a c k barriers.

I'm thirty

B u i l d i n g slowly

f r o m a bass-led intro into a g r e a t

a n d a b i g crate of larger.

Phew!

p e r f e c t if y o u ' r e t h e m o s t p o p u l a r b o y o r girl

o n the block.

and

Boycey:

Thirty-eight?

T h a t ' s e n o u g h stuff f o r e v e n t h e

saddest fool to m a k e s o m e friends - o r

Runners

u p prizes

r a n g e f r o m m o r e b e e r t o t-shirts t o b a g s ,

eight a n d R i c h a r d is late twenties s o we've b e e n a r o u n d f o r a w h i l e

not least the mightily i m p r e s s i v e s i n g l e , Forever.

1 0 f r e e tickets t o s e e

there's tonnes s o everyone

should

enter.

That's quite o l d f o r a p o p star.

Tim: I've d o n e a lot o f different things in m y t i m e , a n d m y e x p e r i e n c e s h a v e

universal love s o n g , it is o n e o f

c h a n g e d m e a lot. I u s e d t o w a n t to b e a fish farmer, a n d then s o m e w o r k

the best s o n g s they h a v e r e c o r d -

e x p e r i e n c e s h o w e d m e that fish f a r m e r s w e r e all B a r b o u r w e a r i n g u p p e r

(the a n s w e r is in t h e a r t i c l e t o t h e left a n d

e d . It b r i n g s t o m i n d t h e S t o n e s

class tossers. I've a l s o lived a f e w years o f h e d o n i s m a n d b e d l a m .

and

Primal

maintains

Scream,

their

yet still

fairly

unique

I used

to m a k e r e g u l a r trips t o A m s t e r d a m , a n d a l t h o u g h I've c a l m e d d o w n a lot, I still think the p l a c e is great.

Boycey:

picked

o u t in b o l d ) ,

s o you've n o

excuse whatsoever for missing out.

I love little p i c t u r e s q u e E u r o p e a n cities.

s o u n d of guitars b l e n d i n g s e a m lessly with H a m m o n d g r o o v e s .

W h a t ' s m o r e is t h a t t h e q u e s t i o n is e a s y

S o will o n e ot these cities b e y o u r c h o i c e f o r y o u r m a d m i l l e n i u m

enter

below

simply and

answer

get

your

the question answers

party, o r will y o u b e D J i n g a r o u n d the w o r l d ?

f e l i x @ i c . a c . u k o r p o p i n t o t h e o f f i c e with

O n e g r u m b l e is p e r h a p s that t h e

Tim: There's this little i s l a n d just off the west c o a s t of S c o t l a n d c a l l e d Beaut,

your a n s w e r o n a free p o s t c a r d f r o m the

majority o f the s o n g s a r e a little

a n d I think I'll b e there with a f e w c l o s e friends. I can't b e a r s e d with m a k -

U n i o n a n d p o p it i n t h e b o x with

too down

i n g a b i g d e a l of it s o I'm o p t i n g out. I s u p p o s e it's m y a g e a g a i n . I'm n o t

n a m e o n it. M o r e t h a n n i c e !

tem po . There

also

aren't really a n y o b v i o u s s i n g l e s in the v e i n o f say O n e To

Anoth-

b o r i n g really!

It's a l s o just after the t o u r w e ' r e d o i n g s o it will b e g o o d t o

b e a b l e t o relax

What

er. Yet, w h i l e m a n y of their m o r e illustrious

peers

have

either

your

Death

Vegas's

Boycey : A n d finally b e f o r e w e run o u t o f s p a c e , it's Felix c h e e s y q u e s t i o n

f a d e d o r a r e s t u m b l i n g (e.g. t h e

t i m e W e a l l k n o w that there ain't n o party like a n S - C l u b Party, s o w h o

... a n d d o n ' t f o r g e t t o e n t e r !

Roses a n d O a s i s ) , t h e C h a r l a -

w o u l d it b e R a c h e l , H a n n a h , J o o r the o t h e r o n e ?

just i n c a s e y o u r entry d o e s n ' t w i n y o u a

tans c o n t i n u e t o consistently p r o -

Tim:

M A S S I V E night o u t o n the C a r l i n g

Sorry m a t e , I haven't g o t a c l u e w h a t you're o n a b o u t .

duce g o o d albums.

However,

Pre-

m i e r tour, y o u c o u l d a l w a y s p a y f o r y o u r -

Max

B o y c e y s p o k e t o T i m f r o m D e a t h in V e g a s courtesy o f C a r l i n g D e a t h in Vegas's s e c o n d a l b u m

The Contino Sessions

is o u t n o w

self, b u t t h a t w o u l d n ' t b e a s m u c h f u n . W o u l d it?

R I 1

frequency * A Ocean Colour Scene So Low (Island)

Robbie Williams She's The One / It's Only Us

Geneva Dollars in the heavens (Nude) Shack

L o w finds

the

Ocean

Colour

G e n e v a return after a t w o y e a r hiatus

mode.

with a n o t h e r t r a d e m a r k s o a r i n g e p i c .

S c e n e b o y s c l e a r l y in b a l l a d Recently mostly

Robbie been

has

headlining

W h i l e personally I prefer them w h e n

The

they c u t l o o s e , like o n Hundred

vocals,

s t a d i u m s - h o w d i d that

High

O f this d o u b l e

with

happen?

A s i d e , It's Only

Us is just

average,

b u t She's

One

piano-led

infectious,

love

the Angels

s o n g in

vein, which,

familiar high

ingredients

choral

production values,

and

A c l e a r single of the w e e k

City, this is a w e l l written s o n g

s h i m m e r i n g celestial guitars c o m b i n e t o

for m e .

and

c r e a t e a m o v i n g a n d t h o u g h t f u l racket.

rather

wonderful

M u s i c a l l y Dollars

Fable,

Pull Together

nice

vocal

harmonies

understated guitars.

The

Mile

Pull Together (Destiny)

They've

shown

In The Heavens

is n o t

will

please

f ans e v e n m o r e t h a n cancelled

lecture

HMS is a

in t h e p a s t t h o u g h that they're c a p a -

a m i l l i o n m i l e s f r o m early S u e d e , but

stirring,

with a g r e a t sentiment of

b l e o f d o i n g this t y p e o f s o n g f a r b e t -

whilst

ter t h a n t h i s , s o a bit o f a d i s a p p o i n t -

s o u n d of the gutter, G e n e v a

their

label

mates

peddle

ment all t o l d .

s o m e t h i n g a bit m o r e stellar.

the

b r i n g us

taking

song

his

anthemic

together.

w h i l e h ardl y essential listening,

Taken f r o m the

the

song

world

It's the kin d of

that

bands

p o r t i n g , w o u l d kill to write

would

y o u r a v e r a g e IC student.

Stereosister Shamefaced (Freakout records)

Inhale Feed (Jam Inc) Fro m the m o m e n t y o u hear you

the

opening

know

what

riff

you're

The Lightning Seeds Life's Too Short (Epic)

Morgan Miss Parker (Source)

If this b a n d w e r e

be forgiven as a b u n c h of

laugh.

B r o u d i e , in w h i c h h e s e e s fit t o i n f e c t

f a i r p l e t h o r a o f i d e a s i n t o less t h a n

one

three

record

A d e e p l y u n e t h i c a l e x p e r i m e n t by M r

a d d s o m e keyboards to the

mix,

denying

there's that

Inhale

of his i n f a m o u s

pop choons

with t h e v i r u s o f d i s c o .

T h e result is

basically

try p o o r l y t o

replicate

the

product

likes

blokes

In w h i c h M o r g a n m a n a g e s t o stuff a

W h i l e they m a y

predictably

slick

in w h i c h

and

soulless

the great

sage

minutes.

play-

i n g in a p u b they c o u l d

in f o r with this - a n g s t rock.

Strange

flavoured o r g a n work

Caribbean underpinned

having

Unfortunately,

some

coked-up

executive

has

d e c i d e d to u n leash their

by s o m e s u i t a b l y l a i d - b a c k b e a t s -

artistic

o n t o p w e g e t t h e m u s i n g s o f little

w e a r y p u b l i c I f e e l it m y

output

M o r g a n s e e s fit t o

duty to p r o v i d e a w a r n -

Radio-

o p e n s o u r m i n d s t o his t a k e o n life

M o r g a n junior.

without

the universe a n d everything. W a r n -

t h r o w in bits o f b r a s s , s t r i n g s , stutter-

ing.

ing: those possessing a convention-

ing guitar, a n d unidentifiable e l e c -

circumstances

their o w n . U n i n s p i r i n g .

al m o r a l o u t l o o k m a y b e o f f e n d e d

tronic

insipid, moronic, deriv-

Nirvana head adding

and but

anything

' by t h e u n s e t t l i n g s u b t e x t o f i n c e s t u ous buggery.

O C S , w h o they a r e s u p -

noise

when

appropriate.

D o not u n d e r any

M o s t pleasingly of a l l , he finds r o o m

ative

for

Seahorses

pseudo-theremin

a n d a worthy bassline.

meanderings

wank.

b u y this

the

covering the

Wonderstuff.

.Singles by Michael...

frequency . A

9 Talking All That Jazz London Jazz Festival -12 to 21 November

Urusei Yatsura Yon Kyoku In EP (limit break) o n e of

Y o u h a v e t o a d m i t t h a t j a z z is b e s t e n j o y e d w h e n l i s t e n e d t o in a s m a l l ,

H e r e ' s a list o f t h e c h o i c e s t cuts f r o m t h e

those b a n d s w h o s h o u l d b e

n o i s y , s m o k y c l u b , o v e r c r o w d e d by sexy a n d c l a s s y c o u p l e s . H o w e v e r ,

L o n d o n Jazz Festival.

amazingly

s o m e artists' i n t e r n a t i o n a l s u c c e s s m e a n s they c a n o n l y p e r f o r m in b i g

making

c o n c e r t halls o n their w o r l d t o u r s ; a n d that m e a n s n o a t m o s p h e r e ,

these

l a c k o f style e t c . . . d o e s n ' t it? W e l l , m a y b e

Great!

Urusei

one's

Yatsura

ever

are

popular, heard

but noof

them.

I m a g i n e , if y o u will, the a t m o s phere

in a n intimate

venue

not: there w a s a

Cuban

maybe

H o p e f u l l y I'll b e

than I'll

just a f e w o f

see

you

there?

B o n a n z a at t h e B a r b i c a n H a l l o n F r i d a y 1 5 t h with t h e b a n d s r e s p o n -

w h e n this b a n d , the s u p e r b

sible f o r the s o u n d track of the highly successful film 'Buena

Scottish s u c c e s s o r t o the Pix-

Social Club'.

ies, hits t h e s t a g e

it t o m o r e

Vista

14th

November

Courtney Pine @ Hammersmith Apollo T h e t o r c h b e a r e r o f British J a z z in r e c e n t

letting fly

G u e s t s will b r i n g jazz a n d hip-

with viciously g o o d alternative

Th e y m a y h a v e b e e n a r o u n d 5 0 years o l d o n a v e r a g e , but the m u s i c

years.

rock. T h e s o n g s K e w p i e s Like

w a s f a b u l o u s . T h e r h y t h m s w e r e i r r e s i s t i b l e a n d m o s t of t h e c r o w d

h o p f r o m bot h sides of the Atlantic.

a n d S l a i n By Elf

p r o g r e s s i v e l y s t a r t e d d a n c i n g in t h e a i s l e s ! F u r t h e r m o r e , at t h e e n d o f

h a v e a lyrical sillyness n o t s e e n

the f i e s t a , the b a n d invited s o m e of the c r o w d to d a n c e o n stage. T h e

14th

Dog

C u b a n fire h a d s e n t t h e B a r b i c a n h a l l o n a o n e w a y trip t o S a n t i a g o !

Khaled @ Royal Festival Hall

Watermelon

since

Terrorvision's

C h e w e d The H a n d l e , belying the

emotional

message

beneath.

Th e t o w e r i n g figure of r a i . A p r o m i s i n g This p r o v e s that jazz c o n c e r t s don't h a v e to be r e p e n t a n c e , a n d m o r e

J5fh November Brandford Marsalis @ Royal Festival Hall

A n d that's not e x a g g e r a t i n g .

b l u e s y n i g h t with e x o t i c f l a v o r s .

i m p o r t a n t l y , t h e y ' r e t h e o n l y w a y t o listen t o t h e b e s t m u s i c i a n s a l i v e !

This latest EP is all that, yet a little

November

- dare

I say -

m a t u r e ? It t a k e s a n e w d i r e c -

T h a t ' s w h y y o u s h o u l d try a n d g e t t i c k e t s t o s o m e o f t h e a c t s o n o f f e r

at the L o n d o n Jazz

y o u n g s a x l e g e n d , p r o m o t i n g his p h e -

Festival

in N o v e m b e r .

The Zawinul

Syndicate,

tion like t h e p r o v e r b i a l fresh

B r a n d f o r d M a r s a l i s , D i a n n e R e e v e s a n d Taj M a h a l a r e s o m e o f t h e

n e w p a i r of p a n t s ; s t r a n g e at

j a z z l e g e n d s c o m i n g t o L o n d o n , a n d they w i l l a s s i s t British f r o n t s c e n e

first, then just b e c o m e s a part

artists l i k e C o u r t n e y P i n e a n d A n d y S h e p p a r d

of y o u . K a y t r o n i c a is t h e first

best jazz c o n c e r t s y o u c a n get.

in o f f e r i n g s i m p l y t h e

rare

London

appearance

f o r the

n o m e n a l last r e l e a s e : ' R e q u i e m ' .

16th

November

The Zawinul Syndicate @ Barbican Centre

track a n d the m o s t t r a d i t i o n a l -

See article

ly Yatsura with s o m e f a m i l i a r

T h e t w o acts that will steal the s h o w , a r e : D i a n n e Reeves a n d J o e Z a w -

high

i n u l . D i a n n e R e e v e s is a n o t h e r o n e o f t h e s e artists w h o c a n set a n y

16th

c o n c e r t h a l l o n f i r e ; a n d s o s h e d i d a y e a r a g o at t h e R o y a l

Taj Mahal @ Royal Festival Hall

pitch

twanging.

Still

E x p l o d i n g e a s e s us into n e w unexplored

territory

Festival

November

and

H a l l , p a c k e d with y o u n g b l a c k w o m e n w h o c o u l d n ' t stop expressin g

s o u n d s s u s p i c i o u s l y like their

t h e i r l o v e f o r t h e m u s i c . H e r v o i c e is i r r e s i s t i b l e , h e r s c a t i m p r o v i s a -

n a t i n g a d v e n t u r e b e t w e e n b l u e s a n d his

f e l l o w S c o t s , Idlewild. N e x t u p ,

tions w o u l d m a k e a paralyzed 90-year-old stand up a n d d a n c e , a n d

African roots.

the a c o u s t i c , N o b o d y we're

Stars

is sensitive

T h e A m e r i c a n b l u e s l e g e n d in a f a s c i -

knows

her s o n g s a b o u t fighting f o r survival a n d bein g strong m a k e her s h o w

and

u n m i s s a b l e both f o r the music a n d for the ideas c o n v e y e d . J o e Z a w -

20th

inul,

Andy Sheppard @ Royal Festival Hall

m e l l o w , if a little frustrated. W e

keyboardist

founder

of the g r o u n d b r e a k i n g

group

'Weather

November

finish o n M o t h e r of t h e M B K , a

Report', mixes f u n k, r o c k , s a m p l e s a n d jazz to revive M i l e Davis' e l e c -

Carla

very u n u s u a l s o n g w h i c h c a n

tric p e r i o d . H i s m u s i c is v e r y u p b e a t , a n d I p r o m i s e y o u , y o u w o n ' t

a c c o m p a n y the s u p e r b sax player. Three

only

sleep t h r o u g h that o n e !

m u s i c i a n s at t h e t o p o f t h e i r art.

T h e s e c o n c e r t s a r e n ' t e x a c t l y c h e a p , a n d y o u h a v e t o b o o k in a d v a n c e to g e t the best seats f o r the lowest p r i c e s ; but n o jazz-fan s h o u l d miss

2?sf November Dianne Reeves @ Royal festival Hall

them. Nice.

See article.

be described a

being

superposition

(please

don't hit m e , please)

of t h e

other three s o n g s . Hardy

Etienne

Bley

and

Steve

Swallow

will

Etienne

frequency * A j

i r ~ i

til i l | l

Planet V @ Fabric

Techtonics @ The Pleasure Rooms .. River Journey...

Recommended Clubbing

The o p e n i n g night at o n e o f

C l u b e x p e r i e n c e s never fail t o a m a z e m e . From never h e a r d

before

If y o u like a lot o f c h o c o l a t e o n y o u r b i s -

L o n d o n ' s n e w l y b i l l e d 'super-

m a d tunes, to the p e o p l e y o u meet - it's always a l a u g h .

That's

cuit, join o u r club. O r g o t o o n e o f t h e

clubs'

drum-n-bass

what

possibly the

however

was a

special, largest

with number

o f DJ's o n

a n y l i n e u p this year.

First u p

m a k e s writing articles a b o u t them sees a r e m a r k a b l e

somehow

s o m u c h f u n . This

first f o r t h e c l u b p a g e

week

I've g o t a p o e m f o r y o u ! Last F r i d a y n i g h t w a s s p e n t i n

The Pleasure

following.

in Felix. Y e s ,

R o o m s f o r t h e i r m a s h u p T e c h t o n i c s c l u b , a n d it w a s

Monday 1st

November

Skin Two Rubber Ball @ Fabric; £38

was O p t i c a l , w h o p l a y e d his

definitely

c u s t o m a r y h a r d b a s s l i n e s . It

w o r d s . S o I w o n ' t . I n s t e a d I'll p a s s o n t h i s p o e m , w h i c h w a s g i v e n

this is t h e a n n u a l b a s h f o r t h e best o f t h e

was o b v i o u s that there w a s

t o m e o n t h e n i g h t . A l t h o u g h i t ' s n o t m u c h t o d o w i t h c l u b b i n g it

fetish c l u b s . I s u p p o s e

no such thing as a warm u p

provides better r e a d i n g than t h e m a s h that I normally c o m e o u t

n a r r o w m i n d e d o r those short of c a s h ,

here: the c r o w d w a s having

w i t h s o a g a i n I'll s h u t u p a n d let y o u r e a d t h e g o o d stuff...

a good

night - perhaps

too good

f o r m e t o put into

it f r o m t h e start.

W i t h a strict r u b b e r a n d P V C d r e s s c o d e

but if y o u ' r e James

it's n o t f o r t h e

u p f o r it y o u c a n ' t f a i l t o

h a v e a g o o d t i m e . I'm a f r a i d I'm just a bit t o o t i m i d f o r this o n e t h o u g h .

THIS! 6th Birthday @ Bar Rhumba; £ 4

T h e c l u b w a s split i n t o t h r e e rooms.

Two were

playing

River

Journey

by Roslyn

Taylor

A n d t h e n they w e r e six! Y e s , G i l l e s Peter-

d r u m - n - b a s s , with t h e t h i r d

son a n d c o get another mention

r o o m playing host t o s o m e

" O C a p t a i n o f m y s h i p , w h e r e d o e s t h e river

"To t h e s e a ! T o t h e s e a ! O n a j o u r n e y t o t h e s e a ! "

this party t h e y ' l l

S p r u n g f r o m the b e d r o c k of my heart

resident J a m e s Lavelle. G e t d o w n .

F e d by t h e w e l l s p r i n g o f m y y o u t h

Tuesday

A n d the tenderest of tears

Bullit @ The Dogstar; FREE!

t h e finest

hip-hop a n d

garage

DJ's a r o u n d . T h e

second

room

h a s without

doubt already

become one

lead?"

here,

b u t it r e a l l y is a n e x c e l l e n t n i g h t a n d f o r

2nd

be joined

by o r i g i n a l

November

of t h e l a r g e s t a t t r a c t i o n s o f

This river o f l o v e in m e

S h it h o t h i p h o p m e a n s p l e n t y o f o p p u r -

Fabric: underneath the floor

W i n d i n g its w i l f u l w a y t h r o u g h t h e s e a s o n s o f m y s o u l

t u n i t i e s f o r b o p p i n g a t this B r i x t o n v e n u e .

is a set o f s p r i n g l o a d e d s u b -

M e l t e d e m o t i o n in full f l o o d

It's a l s o f r e e a n d o p e n till t w o . Y o u ' d

woofers,

A force t o o powerful to d a m

h a v e t o m i s s y o u r n i g h t a t La S c a n d a l e

A c u r r e n t t o o swift t o r e s i s t

though! Dilemmas, dilemmas!

which

floor vibrate

make the

with t h e b a s s .

This t h i n g w a s o n a n o t h e r

I a m swept a w a y t o a g a i n s t a l l better

level,

Without control in these rapids of the soul

a n d when

Roni

Size

judgement

Wednesday

3rd

November

Cafe Noir @ Cafe de Paris; £12

d r o p p e d the beats the f l o o r

M y heart, t o o flimsy a craft t o sail in these waters

H o s t e d by t h e C a r w a r s h t e a m , this n i g h t

went m a d .

Is s h i p w r e c k e d o n t h e g a g g e d r o c k s o f r e a s o n

is b e c o m i n g o n e o f t h e w i l d e s t n i g h t s o n

B r o k e n a n d d i s c a r d e d b y t h e f l o o d o f first l o v e

the

Top performers of the night

N o longer a s e a worthy

women

dressed cream

vessel

club

circuit. A p p a r e n t l y in fresh

there a r e fruit a n d

" A b a n d o n ship!" the c a p t a i n cries

whipped

who

played

packed

T h o u g h he has struggled manfully

place. N e e d I say more?

main

room. Fabio took o n

To s t e e r u s f r o m this f a t e f u l c o u r s e

Swerve @ The Velvet Rooms; £5

were A d a m

another

F a n d J. Majik, to a

level

a n d jazzed

t h i n g s u p with a l a i d

back

lying o n tables

T h e cry c o m e s t o o late f o r m e

Future funk a n d f u n , f u n , fun f r o m m a s -

I a m t a k e n a w a y with h e r t o a watery g r a v e

ter D J F a b i o a n d his pals. Always f u n .

set. H o w e v e r , it w a s A n d y C

W h e r e the c a l m e r currents dwell

w h o really r i p p e d t h e p l a c e

To t h e d e s t i n a t i o n o f m y h e a r t

To have your club

up,

I have always known to be

invite

"To t h e s e a ! T o t h e s e a ! T o a n d e n d i n g i n t h e s e a . "

we like it we'll

rolling

dropping b-lines.

non-stop Top venue,

-top n i g h t , t o p t i m e a l l r o u n d . Gav

in t h e

e-mail: phone:

us along,

added

we'll

to this list just

check

it out and if

put it down

felix@ic.ac.uk 020 7594

8072

ask for James

I S

- THE BUSINESS SOCIETY

*. V * -V *t * * *• * » * * * # * •* * * * * » « * * * *• * »

* * * W * * * » « * * * * * *> #• * * * * * * *> *-

* * : * » * : * * * : *

KPMG

How to become a partner in a big consultancy y g G e

method

Kronos Quartet o Philip Glass V i d e o c o m p l e t e with s o u n d t r a c k a n d C D a v a i l a b l e

Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee... Time's running out to see

Proud Galleries

B u c k i n g h a m Street.

Nearest Tube C h a r r i n g C r o s s

B e l a L u g o s i ' s s u a v e p e r f o r m a n c e in t h e 1 9 3 1 f i l m o f

F i o a t like a butterfly, sting like a b e e . . . . 2 5 s e r e n e p h o t o g r a p h s

A t t h e River S i d e s t u d i o s - n e a r -

D r a c u l a is w i d e l y c o n s i d e r e d t o b e t h e c l a s s i c i n t e r -

s h o w A l i in t r a i n i n g b e f o r e h u m i l i a t i n g the f e a r s o m e

est t u b e H a m m e r s m i t h .

pretation

Bram

Stoker's

bloodsucker

Count.

George

Foreman

Romeo

T e c h n i c a l l i m i t a t i o n s o f t h e t i m e m e a n t t h a t this e a r l y

e G i u l i e t t a . H e r e it is

again,

the classic

'talkie' l a c k e d a s c o r e .

N o w , two of the leading fig-

T h i n k o f M o h a m m a d A l i , think o f the greatest b o x i n g l e g e n d that

The

ures

music, the K r o n o s

e v e r r e i g n e d in t h e seventies. A m a n full of ' c o c k s u r e a r r o g a n c e '

Shakespeare

in c o n t e m p o r a r y

Quartet

original

love

language

story. of

set t o t h e m u s i c

a n d c o m p o s e r Philip G l a s s , have joined forces to

but ' h e a r t e n i n g h u m i l i t y ' , h e of t e n p r e d i c t e d w h i c h r o u n d s h e

of B e l l i n i . C o m b i n e d with e l e -

rectify this a n o m a l y .

w a s g o i n g t o w i n his fights. H i s fights w e r e not o n l y e n t e r t a i n i n g

ments of puppetry a n d Corn-

but a l s o r e s o u r c e f u l t o t h e y o u n g b o x i n g g e n e r a t i o n of that t i m e .

media

R e v i e w s o f t h e C D o f this n e w s o u n d t r a c k h a v e b e e n

T h e n , every k i d in the b l o c k w a n t e d t o b o x like A l i . T h e y b o u g h t

s o m e w h a t l u k e w a r m ; t h e m u s i c suffers f r o m G l a s s '

every s o u v e n i r of h i m a n d a lot o f t h e m e v e n s i g n e d u p f o r a m a -

t e n d e n c y t o re-use a n d r e c y c l e t h e m e s f r o m e a r l i e r

t e u r b o x i n g , but u n f ort u n at ely n e v e r m a d e it p r o .

w o r k s - in this c a s e ,

his p r e v i o u s string q u a r t e t s .

dell'arte.

Finishes 7th November The

SLG

(South

London

T h i s isn't e n t i r e l y a b a d t h i n g , a s his s t r i n g q u a r t e t s

Every o n e o f his fights w a s of t e n p r e c e d e d by a g r e a t d e a l o f

are e x c e e d i n g l y fine p i e c e s of m u s i c : n e w listeners

s h o w m a n s h i p a n d A l i w a s a l w a y s at the c e n t r e o f it a l l . This i n f l u -

m e n t a l with its d i s p l a y s . T w o o f

F o r those with previous e x p e -

e n c e a l o n e m a d e his fights m o r e c a p t i v a t i n g a s m i l l i o n s w o r l d -

them

w i d e turn o n their s c r e e n s to s e e A l i live u p t o his p r o m i s e . H e

and

c e r t a i n l y w o n ' t suffer. rience

of G l a s s '

music,

however,

the soundtrack

alone may be a disappointment.

T h e live p e r f o r m a n c e is a d i f f e r e n t matter.

The Kro-

G a l l e r y ) is o r i g i n a l a n d e x p e r i -

a r e f i n i s h i n g this

week

l o o k well worth the trip;

rarely d i s a p p o i n t e d , often w i n n i n g in a u n i q u e f a s h i o n . This

Intimate H o u s e a n d F r a n c e s c o

c o u l d n e v e r h a v e b e e n truer t h a n in Z a i r e in O c t o b e r 1 9 7 4

Vilalta - O l l e .

when Ali fought a n d beat G e o r g e

F o r e m a n with a t e c h n i c a l

n o s Q u a r t e t - j o i n e d by t h e c o m p o s e r o n k e y b o a r d s

k n o c k o u t in r o u n d e i g h t . A f t e r w a t c h i n g a r e p l a y of that fight o n

Intimate H o u s e uses t h e s t a g e

- perform behind a semi-translucent screen, onto

the ' b i g ' s c r e e n s o f P r o u d G a l l e r i e s , t o s a y that I w a s

a n d w h o l e space to create a n

w h i c h t h e f i l m is p r o j e c t e d .

gasted w o u l d be a n understatement. W h e n he c l a i m e d to 'float

" I n t i m a t e S p a c e with t h e a u d i -

like a butterfly, sting like a b e e ' f e w c o u l d a r g u e .

e n c e " This seems to m e to be

A s the lighting that falls

o n t h e m c h a n g e s , s o t h e y f a d e in a n d o u t o f v i s i b i l ity, like g h o s t s in t h e b a c k g r o u n d o f t h e f i l m . stunningly

atmospheric

effect

that

never

flabber-

Ifs a

intrudes

u p o n t h e f i l m , o n l y a d d s t o it.

either highly o r i g i n a l o r highly T h a t w a s the l e g e n d a r y R u m b l e in the J u n g l e . I h a v e n e v e r s e e n

tantly, with i n t e l l i g e n c e a g a i n s t a m o r e d a u n t i n g o p p o n e n t . A fact Ifs in this c o n t e x t t h a t t h e m u s i c c o m e s i n t o its o w n .

If s o m e a s p e c t s o f

the film a r e m o r e a m u s i n g t h a n 'horrific' f o r a m o d ern a u d i e n c e , G l a s s ' score

Finishes 6th November

that w o u l d m a k e M i k e Tyson q u i t e j e a l o u s .

S u p e r b l y p e r f o r m e d , it g o e s a l o n g w a y t o r e s t o r i n g s o m e of the a t m o s p h e r e of d a r k n e s s the film must have h a d for 1931 audiences.

embarrassing.

a p r o b o x with s o m u c h skill, s p e e d a n d p o w e r , but m o r e i m p o r -

Francesco

Vilalta

Olle

M a n y w h o k n o w h i m w e l l c o m m e n d e d his ' h e a r t e n i n g h u m i l i t y ' ,

attempts to redefine w o m e n as

his ' a m a z i n g s e n s e o f h u m o u r ' a n d his 'artistic a b i l i t y ' . A g r e a t

constructed

inspiration to many, of w h o m w a s p h o t o g r a p h e r D a v i d

does

King.

identities.

She

this t h r o u g h t h e e x p l o -

provides a deliciously

'Let's g e t this straight (folks),' s a i d K i n g in a recent interview, ' I

ration of themes such as s u b -

s p o o k y b a c k g r o u n d t h a t lets us l a u g h w i t h , a n d n o t

w a s not interested in b o x i n g . I w a s interested in A l i . H i s ability

jectivity,

at, this m o s t c e l e b r a t e d o f h o r r o r f l i c k s . A l t h o u g h

t r a n s c e n d e d b o x i n g . ' K i n g ' s 2 5 b l a c k a n d white

a n d desire.

y o u r r e v i e w e r is n o t a w a r e o f a n y f u t u r e U K p e r -

c a p t u r e d A l i in t r a i n i n g in the P e n n s y l v a n i a m o u n t a i n s b e f o r e that

photographs

f o r m a n c e s of ' D r a c u l a ' , a v i d e o of the film, c o m -

l e g e n d a r y fight that m a n y critics r e g a r d a s t h e m o s t c r u c i a l fight

plete with t h e n e w s o u n d t r a c k , h a s b e e n r e l e a s e d by

of his career. A l l the pictures a r e s i g n e d , d a t e d a n d n u m b e r e d

Universal Studios.

o n t h e reverse side .

Joseph

Henry

Odil

sexuality,

language

Finishes 2nd November

Ben

books Cool Classics and Books You Should Have Read Timeless! G r o u n d b r e a k i n g ! Inspirational! A work of p r o f o u n d c u l t u r a l i m p o r t a n c e ! A d a m n e d g o o d r e a d ! C o o l C l a s s i c s a n d B o o k s Y S H R , the Felix f e a t u r e w h e r e y o u g e t t o l e a r n a b o u t o l d b o o k s that m a k e y o u s e e m m o r e c u l t u r a l l y a w a r e t h a n y o u really a r e , a n d m a y b e e v e n r e a d o n e .

Arthurian

legend

has recently

fallen

into

disrepute. As perhaps

o n e of the m o r e

easily

accessed

stories of

E n g l i s h / C e l t i c myth it h a s in t u r n s b e e n r o m a n t i c i s e d , d e m y t h i c i s e d , o v e r s i m p l i f i e d a n d u s e d a s f o d d e r f o r S a t u r d a y a f t e r n o o n t e l e v i s i o n . A n d o n a less i n n o c e n t n o t e I c a n s a y t h a t t h e n a m e L a n c e l o t h a s b e c o m e s y n o n y m o u s w i t h t e l evision p r o g r a m m e s involving a cringeworthy plot a n d ladies of a d u b i o u s nature.

Fugitive Pieces, Anne Micheals

Yet I h a v e p l a c e d m y s e l f in t h e u n c e r t a i n p o s i t i o n o f t r y i n g t o p e r s u a d e o t h e r p e o p l e t o r e a d T h e O n c e a n d F u t u r e K i n g w h i c h is u n d e n i a b l y a c l a s s i c n o v e l d e a l i n g w i t h t h e A r t h u r i a n c y c l e , ' K i n g A r t h u r a n d t h e K n i g h t s o f t h e R o u n d as a memoir,

Written

T a b l e ' f o r t h o s e less e n t h u s i a s t i c t h a n m e .

ing

with

youth

start-

against the

It is e s s e n t i a l l y a q u a r t e t o f b o o k s o f w h i c h t h e first, T h e S w o r d in t h e S t o n e is p r o b a b l y t h e best k n o w n - p e r h a p s

back-drop

t h r o u g h t h e a n i m a t e d v e r s i o n r e l e a s e d s e v e r a l y e a r s a g o if n o t in t h e written f o r m . T h e S w o r d in t h e S t o n e is a b e a u -

World

W a r a n d the H o l o -

the

Second

tiful t a l e . T h e c h a r a c t e r s a r e d e f i n e d a n d d e s c r i b e d in a l m o s t c o m p l e t e l y h u m o u r o u s t e r m s a n d that h u m o u r is w o n -

caust,

Fugitive

d e r f u l l y E n g l i s h . O f t h e w h o l e q u a r t e t this s e c t i o n is t h e lig h test in t o n e a n d c h e e r f u l l e s t in s u b j e c t m a t t e r ; t h e t a l e o f

novel of singularly beautiful

a s m a l l b o y , a f f e c t i o n a t e l y k n o w n a s t h e W a r t , g r o w i n g u p i n a f a n t a s t i c e n v i r o n m e n t u n a w a r e that h e is o n e d a y t o

prose a n d powerful imagery.

Pieces

is a

b e t h e K i n g . It m a y s o u n d s i m p l e , it m a y e v e n s o u n d p r e t e n t i o u s , b u t t h e w r i t i n g is s o d e t a i l e d a n d s o e n t e r t a i n i n g T h e first n o v e l by M i c h e a l s ,

that a n o l d e r r e a d e r c a n f i n d i m m e n s e s a t i s f a c t i o n in it.

who

prior

It is n o t a r e a l i s t i c t a l e in a n y s e n s e o f t h e w o r d ; s i t u a t i o n s a r e f a n c i f u l a n d i m a g i n a t i v e in t h e e x t r e m e , e x c e p t p e r -

known

h a p s f o r t h e r a n d o m l e c t u r e s ' o n h o w h e a v y a r m o u r r e a l l y w a s in t h e o l d d a y s a n d h o w that restricted t h e p a c e o f a

poet,

Pieces

was

f o r h e r skills FP' d e q l s with

d u e l . T h e p r o b l e m s that the W a r t e n c o u n t e r s a s he g r o w s u p tend to be of the p h i l o s o p h i c a l a n d theoretical kind rather

memory,

t h a n r u d e a n d d a m a g i n g e n c o u n t e r s with t h e h a r s h n e s s o f life.

the

love,

and

cruelty

capricious

history,

nature

time. But this m a k e s f o r a n i n n o c e n t , l i g h t , w o n d e r f u l l y s e n t i m e n t a l , s i t - b y - t h e - f i r e - a n d - m u n c h - C h r i s t m a s p u d t y p e r e a d . W h i c h is n e v e r a b a d t h i n g , n o m a t t e r w h a t t h e literary t y p e s say.

review

the

cannot task

d o justice

T h e o t h e r t h r e e b o o k s c o n t a i n e d w i t h i n T h e O n c e a n d F u t u r e K i n g d e a l with t h e m a i n c h a r a c t e r s a n d t h e e v e n t s l e a d -

what

ing u p to the des tru ctio n of the R o u n d Table a n d the d e a t h of Arthur. C o n s e q u e n t l y these b o o k s d o not have the bright

s p e c i a l . It is f i l l e d w i t h s h o r t

c h e e r f u l n e s s t h a t is i n h e r e n t in T h e S w o r d in t h e S t o n e .

A s adults the characters are a l l o w e d to have m o r e c o m p l e x

makes

explaining

sensual

this

book

episodes the

through

e m o t i o n s a n d t o t h e r e f o r e exist in a m u c h m o r e c o m p l i c a t e d w o r l d . A l l e x c e p t f o r A r t h u r that is, w h o r e t a i n s t h e s i m -

which

recollections

p l e e m o t i o n s a n d i d e a l i s a t i o n s o f h i s c h i l d h o o d . T h i s is w h e r e t h e n o v e l a s a w h o l e d e v e l o p s its p a t h o s . T h e c e n t r a l

Jakob

c h a r a c t e r h a s the i n n o c e n c e of a stereotypical c h i l d whilst all the characters s u r r o u n d i n g h i m a r e i n v o l v e d in s o m e

story. F o r e x a m p l e , t h e m u r -

Beer

s c h e m e o r p l o t . W h a t I l o v e a b o u t t h e s e t h r e e b o o k s is that t h e a u t h o r d o e s n o t d e a l t o o h a r s h l y with t h e ' b a d ' c h a r -

der

a c t e r s ; h e s h o w s t h e m t o b e h u m a n , t h a t a n y o n e c o u l d m a k e t h e m i s t a k e s that t h e s e c h a r a c t e r s

Jakob hides:

make.

I r e c o m m e n d this t o t h o s e w h o l o v e r e a d i n g a b o u t d i f f e r e n t p e o p l e , t o t h o s e w h o l o v e m y t h s , t o t h o s e w h o w a n t t o

'Noises

l o s e t h e m s e l v e s f o r a little w h i l e in a w o r l d that is n i c e r t h a n I C , a n d t o t h o s e with lots o f w o r k t o d o .

torn Flic

his

become

parents

never heard from

mouth.

Then

while

before father's

silence.

mother had been

of his

sewing

b u t t o n o n m y shirt. S h e k e p t her

Felix Recommends

buttons

chipped

saucer. I h e a r d the rim of the s a u c e r in c i r c l e s o n t h e f l o o r .

E a c h o f t h e b o o k s w h i c h is r e v i e w e d in Felix c a n b e p u r c h a s e d f r o m t h e W a t e r s t o n e ' s b o o k s t o r e o n c a m p u s , next

I heard the spray of buttons,

t o t h e m a i n library, at a d i s c o u n t o f 2 0 % d u r i n g t h e w e e k o f t h e review. W a t e r s t o n e ' s a i m is t o p r o m o t e r e a d i n g in

little w h i t e t e e t h . '

g e n e r a l , by i m p r o v i n g t h e a v a i l a b i l i t y o r titles r e c o m m e n d e d a n d by o f f e r i n g t h e m t o Felix r e a d e r s at a r e d u c e d p r i c e . B e s u r e t o s t o p by t h e s t o r e a n d s e e if y o u a g r e e w i t h o u r r e v i e w s .

W a t e r s t o n e ' s is o p e n M o n d a y - F r i d a y 9 : 0 0 a m t o 7 : 0 0 p m a n d S a t u r d a y

1 0 : 0 0 a m to 5 : 0 0 p m .

R e a d it.

â&#x20AC;˘

Russell

screen •

• • • • • •

;

H a v i n g s e e n their d e b u t project T h e B l a i r W i t c h P r o -

Y o u r b r a i n is telling y o u it's real a n d you're trying t o

really fortunate with a n eight m i n u t e trailer w e p r o -

ject s t o r m t o m a s s i v e f i n a n c i a l a n d critical s u c c e s s

tell yourself it's not s o it's easy t o t h i n g it's real.

d u c e d , a s J o h n P e a r s o n h a d a s h o w c a l l e d 'Split

trailer o n that s h o w s o h e p a i d us s o m e m o n e y f o r

erties in H o l l y w o o d . S o a r e they really a c o u p l e of

Is it true that Heather Donahue earned a knife with her during the shooting of the film?

talented y o u n g h o p e f u l s o r a p a i r of m o v i e brats?

DAN: Y e a h , it w a s a pretty b i g knife. H e r m o m d i d -

h a v e t o raise a lot, but $ 3 0 , 0 0 0 w h e n you're b r o k e

W e l l , here's y o u r c h a n c e t o f i n d o u t , with o u r very

n't w a n t h e r t o d o the film with a b u n c h of strangers

m i g h t as well b e $ 3 0 m i l l i o n - but w e m a n a g e d t o

o w n interview.

in a w o o d s o s h e b o u g h t this b i g knife. Just in c a s e .

s c r a p e it together.

Are you planning to do any sequels or prequels to The Blair Witch Project?

Was there any inspiration from films like Man Bites Dog and Cannibal Holocaust?

Did you actually attempt to show what was harassing the actors in the film?

across

the w o r l d ,

directors

Daniel

Myrick

and

E d u a r d o S a n c h e z a r e n o w t w o of the hottest p r o p -

S c r e e n ' in N e w York C i t y a n d w a n t e d to a i r o u r

the rights to that a n d it h e l p e d us o u t . W e didn't

ED: W e ' r e t a l k i n g t o A r t i s a n a b o u t d o i n g a n o t h e r

ED: I've never actually s e e n ' M a n Bites D o g ' , it's o n e

Dan: B a c k t o the d o c u m e n t a r i e s o f the seventies -

Blair f i l m . It's not g o i n g to b e a s e q u e l but w e h a v e

that's o n a l o n g list of films t o s e e w h e n w e g e t

there's really n o t h i n g c o n c l u s i v e a b o u t t h e m . Y o u

a n i d e a f o r a p r e q u e l that is pretty c o o l b u t we're

h o m e . A s f o r C a n n i b a l H o l o c a u s t w e didn't find o u t

see a g r a i n y p h o t o o f a U F O o r B i g f o o t r u n n i n g

g o i n g t o h a v e to s e e if they're g o n n a let us d o it o r

that film existed until s o m e o n e at S u n d a n c e t o l d us

t h r o u g h the w o o d s . It w a s the r e a l i s m a b o u t those

not. It's really u p to t h e m . T h e y o w n the film n o w ;

that it h a d the s a m e p r e m i s e a s Blair W i t c h . S o w e

things at the t i m e that g o t t o us. O u r p r i m e d i r e c -

they o w n Blair W i t c h . It l o o k s like they m i g h t let us

w e n t h o m e a n d w e n t to a v i d e o store that rent r e a l -

tive w a s to k e e p everything r e a l . W e didn't h a v e the

d o it but it h a s t o b e the right t i m e f o r us a n d the

ly o b s c u r e b o o t l e g type films a n d w e c h e c k e d it out.

budget o r technical know-how to show something

right t i m e f o r t h e m .

It's the exact s a m e p r e m i s e as Blair. This d o c u m e n -

that w a s c o n v i n c i n g l y r e a l . A l m o s t o u t of necessity,

tary c r e w g o e s t o Peru o r S o u t h A m e r i c a in s e a r c h

w e f o l l o w e d this line o f k e e p i n g it r e a l . A n y t h i n g in

What were Heather, Josh and Michael like after the film shoot?

of a c a n n i b a l tribe a n d they find it a n d n e v e r g e t

the r a w f o o t a g e that l o o k e d c o n t r i v e d ; w e g o t rid o f

out. I g u e s s they a r e e a t e n . W e didn't e v e n finish it.

it.

DAN: W h a t y o u guys w a t c h is 8 2 minutes o f a b o u t

It's pretty b r u t a l . They kill a n i m a l s o n s c r e e n a n d

Do you think you are marketing a myth or concept rather than just a film?

twenty h o u r s of r a w f o o t a g e . They k n e w it w a s us

that's their g o r e . There's o n e s c e n e w h e r e we're sure

r u n n i n g a r o u n d the tent 'cos w e shot t h e film in this

they use a h u m a n c o r p s e f o r o n e of the effects.

w h o l e real-time f o r m a t w e r e w e h a d t h e actors g o

W h a t really inspired Blair w e r e t h o s e o l d d o c u m e n -

Dan: Exactly, yes. I think that's what's u n i q u e a b o u t

o u t there a n d run this i m p r o v i s a t i o n s i t u a t i o n . T h e

taries. In the states they h a d these p s e u d o - d o c u -

Blair W i t c h . T h a t it is a w h o l e w o r l d that it is a w h o l e

w h o l e p r o c e s s w a s a n e x p e r i m e n t . It w a s t o u g h o n

m en t ari es

about

m y t h o l o g y a n d the film y o u s e e is really just a part

everybody. W e h a d a 2 4 7 s h o o t o n o u r side a s

U F O ' s , B i g f o o t a n d stuff like that a n d a s kids E d

with

Leonard

Nimoy

narrating

of it. It didn't start o u t that w a y but it certainly

w e l l . O n o n e s i d e , it w a s very t o u g h a n d very d r a i n -

a n d I w e r e terrified by those things s o that w a s r e a l -

e v o l v e d o v e r t i m e . That's w h a t I l o v e d a b o u t Star

ing but as a n actor, they h a d the o p p o r t u n i t y t o d o

ly the inspiration b e h i n d Blair.

W a r s o r Star Trek. They h a d a w h o l e w o r l d c r e a t e d

a n eight-day p l a y 2 4 h o u r s a d a y in c h a r a c t e r with

a r o u n d t h o s e films a n d o n a s m a l l level that's w h a t w e d i d with B l a i r W i t c h . T h e w e b site h a s e n a b l e d

g o n n a g e t that o p p o r t u n i t y a g a i n . A s tiring a s it w a s

Do you think the film works better on the big screen or will it be better on video?

at the e n d , it w a s really r e w a r d i n g f o r everybody .

Ed: I think it w o r k s well o n the b i g s c r e e n but I think

s h o w e d the m y t h o l o g y a b o u t the m o v i e a n d it w a s

it d o e s w o r k better o n v i d e o . A lot o f p e o p l e w h o

definitely this c o m p o n e n t t h i n g o f this b i g g e r t h i n g .

total

creative

freedom.

They're

probably

never

Do you know of anyone who saw the film and thought it was real?

g o t o the m o v i e say that film didn't s c a r e t h e m a n d

Ed: A friend o f o u r s t o o k the m o v i e w h e n w e h a d

c o m e s o u t o n v i d e o , rent it, g o t o y o u r h o u s e a l o n e

I a l w a y s write t o t h e m a n d say " W h e n the m o v i e

us t o h a v e this c o m p l e m e n t a r y

experience

that

Is the film called The Blair Witch Project after Linda Blair in The Exorcist?

just f i n i s h e d e d i t i n g it a n d p o p p e d it into his V C R at

at 1 a m a n d p o p it in a n d tell m e if it s c a r e d y o u . " I

Dan: it w a s n a m e d after Blair h i g h s c h o o l in M a r y -

h o m e a n d his m o m e n d e d u p w a t c h i n g it a n d h e

think it w o r k s better that w a y

l a n d a n d it's a g o o d g e n e r i c n a m e that s o u n d like

didn't tell h e r it wasn't r e a l . E v e r y b o d y h a s a c a m -

a b u n c h o f o t h e r m y t h o l o g y in that a r e a s o it just

c o r d e r a n d a s s o o n a s a f r i e n d p o p s in a v a c a t i o n

Did you find it easy to finance the film?

b l e n d e d in with truth. There's n o reference t o T h e

video

there's

Dan: N o , most of the f i n a n c i n g w a s out of o u r o w n

Exorcist in a n y w a y ; it's just c o i n c i d e n c e .

shaky c a m e r a a n d t h e s a m e t h i n g w o r k s f o r Blair.

credit c a r d s , s a v i n g s , friends, a n d family. W e w e r e

you're

convinced

it's real

because

Helen

screen

ODEO

CINEMA What's on at ICU Cinema

Vampires

At last, I h a v e w i t n e s s e d the n e w l o o k I C U

A h o r r o r m o v i e by J o h n C a r p e n t e r , d i r e c t o r o f s u c h

This

cinema

cult flicks a s T h e T h i n g , V i l l a g e o f the D a m n e d

b e n e v o l e n t l y d o n a t e d five p a i r s o f tickets t o

f o r myself.

Gone

are the days

Pushing Tin Competition

and

week

the O d e o n

H a l l o w e e n , s h o u l d b e a n e v e n t not to miss. T h e s a d

see

hearing a i d .

truth is that his latest f i l m , V a m p i r e s , wili p r o b a b l y

( G r o s s e Point B l a n k ) a n d Billy B o b T h o r n t o n

p a s s by w i t h o u t m u c h a c c l a i m .

(Armageddon).

your

granny's

T h a n k s t o the m a r v e l l o u s n e w D o l b y

Digi-

tal s o u n d , y o u d o n ' t h a v e t o l i p - r e a d

any-

more.

You don't even have t o squint any-

m o r e w h e n the f o c u s g o e s a s they've f i n a l ly s o r t e d t h a t o u t . S o , h e y p r e s t o , w e n o w h a v e a m a s s i v e s c r e e n t h a t g e t s u s e d t o it's f u l l p o t e n t i a l a n d is a c r e d i t t o o u r U n i o n . This

week

I C U cinema

clever a n d funny G o ! action

Thomas

Crown

is s h o w i n g t h e

a l o n g side theallAffair.

Both

are b e i n g shown o n M o n d a y a n d

films

Tuesday

evening.

Tin starring

John

have

w h e n y o u c o u l d o n l y h e a r t h e f i l m if y o u borrowed

'Pushing

Kensington

Cusack

T h e story f o l l o w s J a c k C r o w (James W o o d s ) a s l e a d e r

P u s h i n g T i n is a c o m e d y a n d d r a m a

of T e a m C r o w ' , a g r o u p o f M e r c e n a r y V a m p i r e slay-

life, l o v e , a e r o p l a n e s a n d o t h e r b u m p y r i d e s .

ers f u n d e d by the C a t h o l i c C h u r c h . By ' c l e a n i n g o u t a

Set

nest s o m e w h e r e in M e x i c o - e n t e r o v e r use o f a m i g o

chaotic

in the high-tension a t m o s p h e r e a i r traffic

control

centre

about

of the

for N e w

a n d p a d r e - they i n c u r the w r a t h o f a p o w e r f u l m a s -

York's t h r e e m a j o r a i r p o r t s this f i l m is a b o u t

ter v a m p i r e n a m e d V a l e k w h o d e c i m a t e s the entire

territorial

team

they d e a l with t h e m .

except C r o w

and

Montoya

(Daniel

Baldwin,

feelings

between

menand

how

a n o t h e r o f the B a l d w i n brothers). It is left t o t h e m t o p r e v e n t V a l e k f r o m f i n d i n g t h e Berziers C r o s s . This

A s a l w a y s a l l y o u h a v e to d o is a n s w e r a s i m -

cross w o u l d a l l o w him a n d all vampires to walk by

ply q u e s t i o n , T h i s w e e k t h e q u e s t i o n is

d a y , m a k i n g t h e m i m p o s s i b l e to kill. G o ! is a s t o r y t o l d f r o m t h r e e p e r s p e c t i v e s . It's a b o u t a b u n c h o f y o u n g

Californians

This story is a g o o d i d e a ; it h a s s o m u c h p r o m i s e but

trying t o get s o m e c a s h , d o a n d d e a l s o m e

is s o m e h o w left a little t h i n . T h e m m is s l o w - p a c e d

d r u g s , a n d a c q u i r e sex in Las V e g a s .

They

a n d d e l i b e r a t e d . It is s o m e w h e r e b e t w e e n a s p a g h e t -

a l l just w a n t t o e x p e r i e n c e t h e r u s h o f l i f e .

ti w e s t e r n (over l o n g shots o f t o u g h m e n in a d e s e r t

G o ! is s o r t o f a t e e n f l i c k b u t d o n ' t b e p u t

b a c k g r o u n d ) a n d a h a m m e r h o r r o r (latex b o d y parts

o f f a s it is d e f i n i t e l y w o r t h w a t c h i n g .

a n d plenty o f b l o o d ) . Still the p r o d u c t i o n q u a l i t i e s a r e high, especially considering the modest budget of

The

Pierce

$20 m i l l i o n . F o r a h o r r o r it is rarely scary, l e a v i n g y o u

a n d Rene Russo in a r e m a k e of

firmly r o o t e d at the b a c k o f y o u r seat. This is p r o b a -

Thomas

Brosnan

Crown

this f i l m a b o u t likes t o steal when

Affair

a bored

stars

millionaire w h o

a r t . It t u r n s i n t o a

the leading

characters

comedy

fall in love

Who connects Pushing Tin and Four Weddings And A Funeral? A n s w e r s o n a virtual p o s t c a r d to

film.felix@ic.ac.uk before Wednesday 3 November.

T h e w i n n e r o f last w e e k s B l a i r W i t c h c o m p e -

bly b e c a u s e y o u feel little e m p a t h y with a n y o f t h e tition h a s w o n the f a n t a s t i c a l l y a m a z i n g B l a i r characters,

particularly W o o d s ,

w h o seems

deter-

W i t c h g o o d y b a g , a n d that p e r s o n is

m i n e d to d o t h i n g s the h a r d way.

Jennifer Edwards

a n d Russo's c h a r a c t e r finds herself m a k i n g a tough decision.

It w o u l d b e u n f a i r t o say that o n c e the f i l m h a d starte d I w as n 't interested i n the e n d , a n d the c i n e m a t o g -

A n d the runners u p w h o all got the q u e s t i o n

In c a s e y o u h a v e n ' t f o u n d t h e c i n e m a yet it

r a p h y is c e r t a i n l y g o o d ; b u t s o m e w h e r e

r i g h t , g e t a p a i r o f t i c k e t s t o s e e this m o s t t e r -

is l o c a t e d i n t h e c o n c e r t h a l l i n t h e

union

l i n e , it just fails t o c a p t u r e the i m a g i n a t i o n . P e r h a p s

cinema

this is b e c a u s e it t r e a d s a n u n e a s y line b e t w e e n trying

that you c a n take y o u r b e e r in to sup o n

to b e g r o u n d b r e a k i n g w h i l e still k e e p i n g to the v a m -

while watching a g o o d film.

pire e t h o s . T h e v a m p i r e s m a y b e i m m u n e to g a r l i c but

b u i l d i n g a n d is p r o b a b l y t h e o n l y

a l o n g the

rifying f i l m . T h e y a r e

S Comber E Mavrikas N Balakumaran C Gamonpilas J Williams

they still w e a r g o t h i c e v e n i n g w e a r . A l s o , don't f o r g e t t o l o o k at the posters o n the w a l k w a y the s h o w i n g s .

f o rthe times a n d

details of

F o r a Friday n i g h t o u t this f i l m is h a r d l y r e c o m m e n d a b l e , but f o r a c h a n g e f r o m t h e u s u a l

Hollywood

b l o c k b u s t e r it m a y b e w o r t h a l o o k .

P l e a s e c a l l b y t h e Felix o f f i c e t o c o l l e c t y o u r tickets .

Katherine and D a v e

react© *

S S E

Joy Tech Jordan Grand Prix Steering Wheel

Carmageddon

Viv: It w a s with g r e a t a n t i c i p a t i o n t h a t I first l a i d m y h a n d s o n J o y Tech's

Partially

banned

(PSX)

f o r its v i o l e n t

the d e a d

m e n w a l k i n g into a waii

E n d o r s e d by J o r d a n G r a n d Prix I h a d v i s i o n s o f m i m i c k i n g t h e

n a t u r e , C a r m a g e d d o n is a w i l d r a c -

for

D a m o n H i l l o f o l d . . . B o a s t i n g a F l c a r style w h e e l , g e a r c h a n g e a n d built

i n g g a m e . S e t in t h e y e a r 2 0 2 8 , a

m i g h t e v e n e a r n a p p l a u s e f o r "artis-

in f o r c e f e e d b a c k this p i e c e o f h a r d w a r e c e r t a i n l y c o m e s w e l l - e q u i p p e d .

new sport has b e e n b o r n to control

tic i m p r e s s i o n " . T h e r e a r e a l s o lots

H o w e v e r , a l l this p r o m i s e t u r n e d t o d u s t w h e n I e v e n t u a l l y j u m p e d i n t h e

a c a t a s t r o p h i c a c c i d e n t that t r a n s -

of w a c k y

driver's s e a t a n d f o u n d t h a t s t e e r i n g w a s r a t h e r m o r e d i f f i c u l t t h a n first

f o r m e d part o f t h e h u m a n r a c e i n t o

you

hoped.

zombies (could happen).

o p p o n e n t s , such a s the hot r o d a n d

PSX w h e e l .

A d j u s t i n g sensitivity m a d e little d i f f e r e n c e , t h e c a r e i t h e r w o u l d n ' t

turn at all o r in s tead went into a n u n c o n t r o l l a b l e swerving m o t i o n , e n d i n g up with a n artistic s p i n .

A s frustration a n d r o u g h h a n d l i n g i n c r e a s e d , the

a "piledriver

bonus"

and you

p o w e r - u p s that c a n a i d

in t h e q u e s t

of caning

your

o p p o n e n t freeze, but there a r e o t h T h e r e a r e s e v e r a l w a y s in w h i c h y o u

ers that c a n s o m e w h a t h i n d e r y o u r

c a n p l a y this g a m e . Firstly y o u c a n

p r o g r e s s , s u c h a s jelly s u s p e n s i o n

c o m m o n t o m o s t w h e e l c o n t r o l l e r s is t h a t a n a g g r e s s i v e t u r n w h e n y o u ' r e

treat it a s a s t a n d a r d r a c i n g

a n d l u n a r gravity. Y o u m u s t n o t f o r -

trying t o b e a t a s h a r p c o r n e r u s u a l l y results i n y o u r lifting t h e w h e e l in t h e

and complete the allotted

air, - w h e e l s a r e s i m p l y n o t h e a v y e n o u g h f o r s e r i o u s d r i v i n g .

of l a p s f a s t e r t h a n

force f e e d b a c k vibrations b e c a m e

barely noticeable.

Another problem

At the e n d

of t h e d a y y o u ' v e g o t t o a s k y o u r s e l f w h e t h e r its w o r t h h a v i n g s u c h a b u l k y

This,

t h i n g y o u c a n d o with

a r e worth the desk

space.

Ben's View:

M y view of the J o y t e c h

Mark's View:

It's b i g , b l a c k a n d

wheel c a n be s u m m e d u p in o n e

l o o k s i m p r e s s i v e (not that

word - disappointing.

the

While the

other

thing).

thing,

I'm t a l k i n g

however,

amount

anybody

accessor/ - personally I don't believe a n y o f them

game

else.

is d u l l a n d s o m e a n y other

get that d u r i n g y o u r z e a l o u s

car-

n a g e y o u r o w n c a r will b e g e t t i n g pummelled

s o y o u must

collect

c r e d i t s s o y o u c a n r e p a i r y o u r c a r in

driving g a m e . Alternatively y o u c a n

o r d e r f o r y o u t o c o n t i n u e the r a m -

waste

page.

anything

that

moves.

This

involves m o w i n g d o w n the z o m b i e s in a g r a t u i t o u s f a s h i o n o r k i c k i n g the

o u t o f t h e o t h e r c a r s b y

I l o v e d this g a m e

because

it w a s

o r i g i n a l a n d t h e g a m e p l a y is h i g h l y

steering

r a m m i n g t h e m t o bits b u t p r e f e r a b l y

addictive.

good a n d

b o t h . It's t h e w a y that y o u c a n p e r -

a r o u n d with careful driving; you're

wheel gives a m u c h better f eel i n g

about

of a c t u a l l y d r i v i n g a c a r , w h a t it

wheel.

d o e s n ' t g i v e y o u is a n y sort o f c o n -

one

f o r m t h e s e a c t i o n s that m a k e it a l l

n o t t r y i n g t o w i n t h e g r a n d prix o r

trol o v e r t h e g a m e .

be the ideal answer to all those

worthwhile

anything.

hard-to-control

games

r a m p i n g off a 100-storey b u i l d i n g

anyone?).

w h i l e p e r f o r m i n g a t r i pl e s o m e r s a u l t

being able t o g o completely a p e

to l a n d o n a p o l i c e c a r s c o r e s h i g h -

and being rewarded for your trou-

ly, a s d o e s a h a n d b r a k e turn a t 1 0 0

b l e in d o i n g s o . F a n t a s t i c .

constantly

I f o u n d myself

weaving

from

left t o

the Joytech It d o e s

would

look

have thought

driving

though.

F o r instance,

right a n d s p i n n i n g o f f t h e t r a c k i n

(Grand

every r a c i n g g a m e

I played. T h e

Surely

whole point of a specialised driv-

wheel

i n g w h e e l is t h a t it m a k e s it e a s i e r

w e c o m e t o t h e r e a l t h i n g . It is a

m p h into a g r o u p of z o m b i e s . That

to d r i v e , n o t h a r d e r .

If I'd p a i d

g o o d i d e a b u t s a d l y t h e w h e e l is

earns you a " c o m b o bonus". Squash

m o n e y f o r this t h i n g I'd b e b a c k a t

just a t a d t o o s e n s i t i v e a n d t u r n s

the

shop

refund.

by n o w d e m a n d i n g

Tourismo

would

a joypad

shaped

like a

is g o i n g t o b e t h e c l o s e s t

hard

games

into

impossible

o n e s . A slight n u d g e of the w h e e l d o e s nothing but a n extra m i c r o n of

pressure

a n d you are doing

3 6 0 ' s a l l o v e r t h e s h o p . It t a k e s a bit

of perseverance

t o master.

O n c e m a s t e r e d it is g o o d f u n b u t I think

it still

tuning.

Once

sure

needs this

some

fine-

is d o n e I'm

it w i l l b e a s u r e - f i r e h i t . It

will give a h i g h e r playability a n d pleasure to all racing games. 2 out o f 5 but with tuning a n easy 4 o u t of 5.

• ••

There

isn't

It is p u r e

a n y arsing

pleasure,

just

like b e i n g i n a c r o c k e r y s h o p a n d

Mark

react© III!

|!f! I Hi

' :' ' ;

p l a y e r t o use o n e a n a l o g u e stick f o r d i r e c t i o n a l

T h e y a n k e e c o m m e n t a t o r will a l s o p r o v i d e s o m e

r o t a t i o n a n d t h e o t h e r f o r thrust. If y o u d o n ' t h a v e

light relief - t h a t is until h e gets a n n o y i n g .

this c o n t r o l l e r t h e left a n d right c o n t r o l p a d s o n

erally s p e a k i n g the s o u n d a n d g r a p h i c s a r e quite

the o r i g i n a l j o y p a d will suffice. Initially m o v e m e n t

g o o d f o r this sort o f g a m e a n d t h e c o n t r o l is w e l l

is e x t r e m e l y tricky a n d you'll f i n d y o u r s e l f stantly

having

to juggle

your

con-

concentration

Gen-

d e s i g n e d , but these factors d o not m a k e u p for the

repetitious, difficult a n d b o r i n g

gameplay.

b e t w e e n a l t i t u d e , thrust a n d a n g l e a s y o u e d g e

Stunt C o p t e r isn't b a d , it just d o e s n ' t

o n w a r d a n d u p w a r d . This c a n b e very f r u s t r a t i n g ,

e n o u g h to k e e p all but a small g r o u p of fanatics

present

e s p e c i a l l y c o n s i d e r i n g t h e f a c t that it's p l a i n o b v i -

interested f o r l o n g . Viv

o u s w h a t y o u h a v e t o d o , it's just difficult t o e x e c u t e t h e a c t i o n . F o r o n c e t h e n t h e t r a i n i n g levels are absolutely necessary a n d anyone w h o g o e s d i v i n g in at t h e d e e p e n d will g e t a s o r d i d c o n f i dence bashing.

Supposedly you should be able

to e n j o y t h e g a m e

R/C Stunt Copter (PSX)

m o r e after t r a i n i n g , h a v i n g

g a i n e d c o m p e t e n c y in integrating all aspects of flying w i t h o u t t o o m u c h t h o u g h t .

A fine theory,

b u t y o u n e e d t o b e p a t i e n t e n o u g h t o r e a c h that A n a i r b o r n e r a d i o - c o n t r o l l e d v e h i c l e is o f t e n t h e

s t a g e , a n d I f o r o n e c e r t a i n l y wasn't.

dream

b e s l a l o m c o u r s e s o r b a l l o o n s h o o t i n g , the m i s -

present f o r m a n y

kids.

Unfortunately

h o w e v e r it's u s u a l l y o n l y t h e p r e t e n t i o u s little r i c h

sions themselves

gits that e v e r g e t h o l d o f o n e .

rarely

R / C Stunt C o p t e r

W h e t h e r it

a r e highly d i s a p p o i n t i n g a n d

last l o n g e r t h a n a c o u p l e o f m i n u t e s .

Even

everyone to sample the

t h e 2 - p l a y e r m o d e is fairly p o o r , with e a c h p l a y e r

f l a v o u r o f f l y i n g a r/c h e l i c o p t e r , w i t h o u t t h e f e a r

t a k i n g t h e i r turn t o c o m p l e t e t h e level o b j e c t i v e s ,

f r o m I n t e r pl a y

allows

of h a v i n g t o f o r k o u t h u n d r e d s if y o u c r a s h t h e

r a t h e r t h a n flying s i m u l t a n e o u s l y . T h e m o s t f u n t o

damn thing...

be h a d actually c o m e s w h e n you're w a t c h i n g y o u r o p p o n e n t , as y o u c a n d r i v e t h e m m a d by s t i c k i n g

Stunt

Copter

was designed

to work

with t h e

Playstation D u a l S h o c k controller, e n a b l i n g t h e

a w h o p p i n g g r e a t h a n d in front of their v i e w (witness s c r e e n s h o t ) .

a s s i g n e d t o assistant m a n a g e r s w i t h o u t d e t r a c t i n g too m u c h fun from the g a m e .

Watching

gation f or Torquay... h a h a h a ! )

your

t e a m in a c t i o n is h i g h l y e n t e r t a i n i n g a n d recreate s

L A M manager

s o m e of the tension y o u get from watching your

n e e r e d a r o u n d t h e P l a y s t a t i o n that the m y r i a d o f

has been s o magnificently e n g i -

f a v o u r i t e c l u b o n T V O f c o u r s e , if t h e g a m e ' s n o t

options available c a n be accessed a n d chang ed

g o i n g s o w e l l y o u c a n a l t e r t e a m tactics o r b r i n g

with m i n i m u m fuss, u s i n g a s i m p l e L/R b u t t o n

in fresh b l o o d at a n y t i m e d u r i n g t h e m a t c h . After-

m e n u system.

math m a t c h analysis a n d 3 D highlights a r e simi-

p r e s e n t e d with e a s y t o r e a d text, a n d e x c e l l e n t

A l l m a n a g e r i a l screens a r e clearly

larly e x c e l l e n t with c o m m e n t a r y f r o m Ray Stubbs

mini-animations t o o . Deservedly so, L M A m a n -

a n d the woefully g o o d A l a n H a n s e n .

ager

nestled in at t h e t o p o f P l a y s t a t i o n

charts e v e r y w h e r e .

sale s

Nuff said. Viv

U p g r a d i n g y o u r s t a d i u m is a fantastic w a y t o w a s t e m o n e y , e s p e c i a l l y o n a c l u b like B r i g h t o n w h e r e t h e a t t e n d a n c e rarely rises a b o v e t h e 5 , 0 0 0

LMA manager (PSX)

mark.

C o a x i n g qu alit y players t o y o u r c l u b is a

f e a t t o b e h o l d i n t h e l o w e r d i v i s i o n s , b u t this is

C o n s o l e s are not r e n o w n e d f o r c o m p l e x , m a n agement

type

games,

but Codemasters' L A M

manager

is a s e r i o u s

n o n - c o n f o r m e r w h e n it

t o p , rather t h a n starting o u t with a r e a d y - m a d e premiership member. T h e youth s q u a d

provides

a n e x c e l l e n t p o o l o f p o t e n t i a l y o u n g stars, a n d if

ball m a n a g e m e n t g a m e f o r a c o n s o l e w h i c h c a n

y o u a r e particularly s c h e m i n g then you'll promote

m a t c h t h e very best a v a i l a b l e f o r the P C - a n d

t h e m a l l t o t h e first t e a m a n d f l o g ' e m off the next

that's w i t h o u t a k e y b o a r d a n d m o u s e .

season.

illiSiP'

.•

If the 5 0 y e a r c a r e e r m o d e d o e s n o t

a p p e a l t h e n there a r e a n u m b e r o f c h a l l e n g e s to

• •

•

• :. :

be tried o u t , a n d you'll b e a b l e t o c o m p a r e y o u r

of u p- to- dat e stats (the c u r r e n t 1 9 9 9 - 2 0 0 0 s e a - f i n a l s c o r e with others o v e r t h e Internet. s o n c o m p l e t e with its real-life fixture list is y o u r

^:ty|| ;

t a k i n g a lowly D i v i s i o n 3 s i d e a l l t h e w a y t o the

c o m e s t o s u c h s t e r e o t y p i n g . A t last there is a f o o t -

A s with m o s t footy s i m s , t h e p l a y e r c a n b e a s s u r e d

m^iJi^

w h e r e y o u s h o u l d start a s its f a r m o r e satisfying

flatmate

in 2-player

mode

Take o n

a n d prepare f o r

starting point) a n d total c o n t r o l o f t h e i r c l u b - if

s o m e s e r i o u s c o m p e t i t i o n in t h e l e a g u e .

they w a n t it. F o r the less p a t i e n t g a m e r t a s k s s u c h

the r e c o r d I l a n d e d 1 3 t h p o s i t i o n f o r B r i g h t o n in

(Just f o r

as p l a y e r t r a i n i n g a n d s p o n s o r s h i p d e a l s c a n b e

the 1st s e a s o n w h i l e m y r o o m - m a t e a t t a i n e d r e l e -

" . •

D A

y Standing Room Only Liverpool v Bradford, live f r o m A n f i e l d .

XS or a

c r a t e of lager 8 p m , da Vinci's

Utopia

Classic for

party

the

party,

tunes

post-match

plus

llblax and cool

down

the c h e .

with

If L i v e r p o o l w a n t t o

bar

r o o m . 9-1 a m , d B s

a n d chill o u t

It's

Friday

cheesy,

cocktail

b e a n y t h i n g less t h a n

n i g h t s , it's it's

pre-

d i c t a b l e , b u t it's d a m n

5 i y c:

ici'IB

good fun. 9-2am, dBs.

a l a u g h i n g s t o c k this season, they'd

better

win. With o r without

Standing Room Only

little St M i c h a e l .

C h e l s e a v Hertha

8 p m d a Vinci's

Berlin, 7 p m d a Vinci's

Fencing Club

Shooting

Pugwash

c p

World Cup Rugby The Final, live from the Millennium stadium in Cardiff M y money's an N e w Zealand beating Australia, but whoev-

Kung Fu Club

Talk f r o m D r J o h n

(Wu S h u K w a n )

Hassard, 1 pm, U D H

Southside G y m

Wine Tasting

4:30pm - 6:30pm

C&GU

6 p m , dB's

O&MC,

Canoe Club Archery

be a damn entertaini n g match G o L o m u

Union G y m , 1 2 p m

Contact Simon n (sime»n.kahn@ic o c uk)

y I Win £50 c a s h

6pm,

C & G

Office

Practice session, 7 p m

CAG

Stereolab @ Heaven; £ 1 0 Groove

Soup run, 8.30p m

S o u p run, 8 . 3 0 p m

Week's

Remy Zero @ Embassy Rooms; £ 7

along to the

ever-reliable

CAG

ambient

popsters.

||bdiohead-approved emotional

rock

from

p $ e o t h e r s i d e o f the

Basement

Super Furry Animals @ Brixton Academy; £12.50

Longpigs @ Heaven; £9

Warp 10th Birthday @ Z Rooms; £10

After

W a r p Records contin-

The

shedding

their

frazzled

Welsh

B r i t p o p s h a c k l e s , this

ue their celebrations,

pop-mongers

return

lot

with

are showcasing

w i t h t h e i r twisty t u n e s .

Pushing Tin

Film

dy w i t h John Cusak. Virgin Fulham Road 3 50, 6.20, 9 00 2.50, 5.40, 8 . 3 0 )

comedy

The

series

Off-the-sca'e

offering

East is East H o w c o u l d y o u possibly

rather

scary

f r o m the M o u s e H o u s e .

apparently...

Odeon Leicester Sq

ABC Tottenham Ct Rd

4.40, 6.40, 9.30

Virgin Chelsea

Odeon Kensington

3.30, 6.15, 8.45

2.30, 4.30, 6.30

4.55, 7.05, 9.15)

The Big Match

11 O'clock Show

begins by

It's

crunch

time f o r

ern cinema's all time

they're

greats - C a r y

and say g o o d b y e .

Moscow State Circus Traditional

just

State

C i r c u s in

randy

Have I Got News... 9.00pm, BBC2

Chelsea

Grant.

Odeon Kensington

- win through,

This

and

o f the art Big

lose

quality honest, I think not.

Merton

are back

"take-no-pri-

sioners" mode. Class.

fa Fringe

pro-

duction o n the "sludge of

Top.

year,

Hislop

•il Ski and Audacily Snowboard show. Amussing

dog".

lexindf

Grim

from

offering

multitude o f screenings

JV.

Warner West End

al Film Theatre a n d the

Rugby World Cup 2 00pm, ITV T h e final, live f r o m Cardiff,' should see N e w Zealand thrashing the Aussics

O d e o n West E n d .

Bremner, Bird and Fortune

rip

u m ,

t h e satirist's

t h e piss

out

Tony's People.

Nice

Romeo e Giulietta

Live a r t . A c t o r s c r e a t e

Fresh

adaptation

erotic

£ 6 - <;24

v.sia Jen ts

of the

classic Love:story.

Barons C o u r t

South L o n d o n G a l l e r y

River Side Studios

£1.50 C o n e .

£1 6 C o n e .

Pay what you c a n Friday

weekly celebration S u n d a y s 3p m & 6 p m imperial Medical Campus ( c h a r i n g Cross) Reynolds B u iI d i n g , The Drew T h e a t r e , R d , H a m m e r s m i t h , W6 St. Dunstans

schedules and break out the cash. C o o f .

midweek cell s v

a n d origional

s p a c e with thier a u d i -

£5 Cone.

Intimate House intimate,

With eight w e e k s to go until the millenni-

C4, 9pm Watch

e n c e . O h errrr... Broadway

every d a y at the N a t i o n -

Virgin Trocodero

mediocrity.

History M u s o Fulhaim

val gets into gear, with a

Check

l o c a l press f o r times.

7 . 3 0 p m , ITV

d o you

Th e L o n d o n Film Festi-

"A c o m e d y o f families, a c h i p s h o p , a n d a very

Virgin Chelsea

LFF

Vampires

resist an yth in g bille d a s

Virgin Fulham Road

5.25, 7.40, 9.55

profiling o n e of west-

pjatual

Blair Witch Project really

What

o u r c o m p o n p. 1 7.

It's

UCI Whiteleys

10.40pm, BBC1

• 9 9 9 BG Ftwlographer

with

and

Squarepusher.

Martin & Murphy.

Hollywood Greats

Tarzan

Bowfinger So-so

Autechre

Red Hot Chili Peppers Death In Vegas @ © W e m b l e y ; £18 50 Shepherd's Bush Expensive, but the Empire; £10 Chili's will m a k e even C o o l sounds you c a n this v e n u e seem intih e a r f o r free if y o u w i n

ardent daily prayer s

Mountaineering Society BEN PICKERSGILL

to c l i m b a n y t h i n g w i t h o u t totally pathetic.

At first t h o u g h t , it a l l s e e m s mad:

looking

T h e skill o f t h e s e

rather

p e o p l e , h o w e v e r , m e a n s that o n e is

piling into a m i n i b u s o n a

a b l e t o d e v e l o p at t h e i r o w n p a c e

c o l d Friday night, b o m b i n g u p t h e

in a r e l a x e d a n d s a f e e n v i r o n m e n t .

W e w e r e very lucky a s there w a s n o

for a c o u p l e of hours a n d then

w a n d e r i n g into a f i e l d , at m i d n i g h t , a

with

torch

source

as your

in w h i c h

only

t o pitch

bonus of sun o n Sunday,

tent!

t h o s e first m o v e s e v e n m o r e e n j o y -

O k a y , s o it is m a d , b u t w h y n o t ? O h , a n d the r e a s o n f o r this? two

awesome

days,

r a i n a l l w e e k e n d , with t h e a d d e d

light

making

able!

To get

Returning to L o n d o n o n Sunday

climbing the

n i g h t , I felt r e f r e s h e d , a l b e i t t i r e d ,

g r i t s t o n e c r a g s o f t h e P e a k District.

and

As a relative n ov ice t o the w o r l d o f

lectures!

rock c l i m b i n g , I wasn't

quite

sure

w h a t t o e x p e c t , b u t just t h e t h o u g h t

ready t o take

o n those 9 a m

It w a s c e r t a i n l y o n e o f t h e

best w e e k e n d s I've h a d in t w o y e a r s of b e i n g a t I m p e r i a l .

of l e a v i n g L o n d o n f o r t h e w e e k e n d Waking

run every o t h e r w e e k e n d , t h e c l u b

to the

o n Saturday

morning

llllili^

As well a s these trips, which a r e

was reason e n o u g h t o g o .

visits a L o n d o n c l i m b i n g w a l l e v e r y

o u t d o o r s o r not.

S o , y o u f e e l like

evening of chatting a n d relaxation.

s o u n d of whistling birds rather than

Wednesday.

h a v i n g a g o ? T h e n just t u r n u p a n d

S o , my a d v i c e t o a n y o n e getting a

r u s h - h o u r t r a f f i c , with t h e c r a g o n l y

first c l i m b , a n d a l t h o u g h

c l i m b i n g is a d i f f e r e n t g a m e t o w a l l

f e w minutes

away,

I was con-

This is w h e r e I d i d m y outdoor

come along.

W e meet at the c o l -

bit f e d u p w i t h d a i l y c o l l e g e life: f o r -

l e g e c l i m b i n g w a l l (off t h e w a l k w a y ,

get S o u t h s i d e , forget tutorial sheets.

v i n c e d I h a d m a d e t h e right d e c i -

c l i m b i n g , it is a n e x c e l l e n t w a y o f

next t o S T A Travel) o n W e d n e s d a y s

P a c k y o u r r u c k s a c k a n d j u m p in t h e

sion!

s e e i n g w h a t c l i m b i n g is a l l a b o u t ,

minibus.

without the c o m m i t m e n t of a w h o l e

(well,

With all the banter from experienced

club

members

more about

weekend

away.

Climbing

walls

1pm.

a n d about

about

also help you to improve your tech-

wall

I w o n d e r e d if it w o u l d b e p o s s i b l e

nique, whether

where

to g o

Gliding Club CHRIS SMART

is y o u r s e l f

t e n quid!)

a n d head around

for a pub somecollege

B e l i e v e m e , it's a b l a s t !

6 p m w e tend to leave the

past t r i u m p h s a n d p l a n s f o r t h e d a y ,

yo u decide

A!! y o u need

Contact Megan megan.bradley@ic.ac.uk.

for an

I C U Jazz and Rock presents.

higher performance

CALAMARI

racin g glider.

T h i s is p a r t o f a n o n g o i n g p l a n t o It h a s b e e n a b u s y a n d s u c c e s s f u l

keep

summer for I C G C ,

date a n d competitive for those w h o

all-in-all. T h e

new committee have taken up their posts

n o w that

vacated

early

by A n d y

Holmes'

d e p a r t u r e for pilot training with B A .

O n t h e c o m p e t i t i o n f r o n t , Luke Rebbeck took our A S W 2 4 , 9 6 , out to

t h e first W o r l d

Junior

Gliding

I C G C w i s h e s A n d y a l l t h e best f o r

C a p t a i n Chris Smart also went out to c r e w f o r h i m . H i g h l i g h t s o f t h e

andgood

luck

his

course. On

trip o u r own summer

course

(the first w e e k o f t h e v a c a t i o n ) few

hardy

poor

individuals braved the

weather

to get some

solid

t r a i n i n g i n lat e in J u n e , a n d o v e r

included

French with

traffic

getting

stuck

in a

j a m , g l i d e r in t o w ,

a n inflatable

plastic c o w n o

spicuous then! A l s o we got the glide r t r a i l e r f l a s h e d by a s p e e d

era o n the w a y h o m e . G o o d j o b the t r a i l e r w a s t h e r e , o r they m i g h t

o u r 2-seater, 4 9 6 . It is g o o d t o s e e

have been abl e to see the n u m b e r

it in u s e o u t o f t e r m t i m e . T h e c u l -

plate a n d w o r k o u t w h o I w a s ! Luke

m i n a t i o n o f this w a s 2 f i r s t - s o l o s a t

f i n i s h e d 2 5 t h o v e r a l l , a g o o d result

the

considering

for Hemraj

and

Duncan

A s h l e y . W e l l d o n e g u y s , a n d k e e p it

he w a s the youngest

p i l o t t h e r e . H e f o l l o w e d this u p with a 2 n d p l a c e in t h e British J u n i o r s .

up! W e have sold o u r basic single seat glider, 2 9 6 t o a D u t c h c l u b , a n d it is s o o n t o b e r e p l a c e d w i t h a

Debut E P " A little More" now available

cam-

a lot o f g e n e r a l f l y i n g w a s d o n e i n

e n d of s u m m e r

http://listen.to/calamari

t h e r o o f o f t h e c a r . N o t at a i i c o n -

the c o u r s e s u m m e r o f t h e s u m m e r

Nithianandarajah

C h a m p i o n s h i p s a t Terlet, H o l l a n d .

the

f u t u re

up to

a r e at c o m p e t i t i o n s t a n d a r d .

a n e w term h a s

started, but the c a p t a i n c y h a d b e e n

the club's equipment

Contact Chris christopher.smart@ic.ac.uk

Catch C A L A M A R I live at : 7/11/99 :

The Monarch, Camden On stage @9.00pm Bar open until l a m ÂŁ5/ÂŁ4 with flyer

Flyers available from Union office

IC Radio - FREE BEER -

- CLASS S O U N D

Radio

h a s just

The Back Room Launch Party

- T O P Q U A L I T Y DJs -

Thursday, 4th N o v e m b e r 19:00 - Bar Close.

SYSTEM -

invested

over

T h e B a c k R o o m - a t the e n d o f

ÂŁ 2 0 0 0 in o u r cosy v e n u e at the e n d of S o u t h s i d e Bar. Y o u c a n n o w e x p e -

Southside

rience crisp treble, s u p e r b m u s i c a n d

the music).

(past t h e t o i l e t s ,

a t h u n d e r o u s b a s s (courtesy o f t w o 18inch

subwoofers),

thanks

How:

to a

If y o u like w h a t y o u h e a r , w e D J

brand n e w s o u n d system. To d e m o n s t r a t e just h o w g o o d

in t h e B a c k R o o m E V E R Y T h u r s d a y

the s y s t e m i s , o u r t o p D J s w i l l b e

a n d F r i d a y n i g h t f r o m 8 till l a t e . W e

playing a variety o f m u s i c f r o m the

latest

Cheesiest 7 0 s music all the w a y to

underground

sounds,

t h e latest u n d e r g r o u n d t e c h n o a n d

t r a n c e , a n d everything in b e t w e e n . Also to celebrate will

the o p e n i n g we

h a v e a 9 0 pint k e g of FREE

19:00-19:30

- L a u r i e (house)

19:30-20:15 - J a m e s

C a r l s b e r g o n offer to a l l w h o c o m e d o w n . T h e a l l - s t a r D J l i n e - u p is a s

all varieties of music f r o m the

22:00-23:00 - A l i c k Sethi

Dynes

follows:

(under-

g r o u n d electronica)

(trance) 20:15-21:15-Tom

d r u m & bass.

21:15-22:00-Matt (hard house)

James

22:45-Close

[ B a c k 2 B a c k ] (trance)

- DJ Lethal

(drum

Contact Dave Edwards i.cradio@ic.ac.uk.

bass) + M C

The Felix Crossword, by Turnip Henry s 1. G l a c i a l h o l l o w h a s n o

31 . Turn t h e b a r r e l o v e r : it c a n b e t i g h t e n e d . (3)

v o w e l s . (3)

4. O t i s a n d c o . like insects. (9) 8. G i r l m a k e s y o u s l o w

1. C o i n - o p m a n

d o w n . (5)

f r i e n d . (9)

9. Fire h e u s e d t o m a k e

2. S t o n e b a l l . (6)

c o w . (6)

3. C h a r g e d p a r t i c l e v o d k a

1 1. S h e r p a b l o k e h a s P i c a s -

gets y o u t o H e a v e n . (1 0)

s o . (5)

5. M o n t y says " C h i p s ,

12. L a b i u m ? O h . Philip,

sausage, eggs, bacon,

Im peria l C o l l e g e , h a s a n

s a u s a g e , e g g s . . . " ? (3,4)

affinity f o r fat. (10)

6. A l i s t a i r likes b o y s a n d

13. The Spanish Australian

girls: h e h a s a n e x c u s e . (5)

utility v e h i c l e w a s h e s o u t . (5)

7. M a s t e r is u p r i g h t . (3)

1 4 . G o b a c k w a r d s after

9. C o o l post o f f i c e is h u g e

m e d i c a l officer playing syn-

a n d h a s w a r m b l o o d . (5)

thesizer. (4)

1 0 . D i e t e c s t a c y is t h e best.

1 6.

(5)

o r b l o c k o f s t o n e . (7)

1 8 . P u b profit is c h e a p . (7)

Answer to 1154 Across: Decimate,scopes,guaca

makes

1 2 . W e t v e g e t a b l e . (4)

2 0 . Negative pleasure for

1 5 . G r u n t ! A n a g a is h u g e !

f l o o d survivor. (4)

(10)

2 3 . Real m a n k e e p s k i n g -

1 7 . C o m p l i c a t e d integrals

d o m . (5)

a r e t h e m o s t t w i s t e d . (9)

2 5 . D e c e m b e r . In a d v e r t

1 8 . O v e r h e a t river. (4)

H e - M a n is m u l t i - f a c e t e d .

1 9. C o m m u n i s t in c o m p a n y

(10)

h a s a belief s ys tem . (5)

2 7 . T h e w h o l e o r c h e s t r a likes

21 . O h ! Trev d o e s s o m e r -

i c e - c r e a m without fruit. (5)

s au lt o p e n l y . (5)

2 8 . C o o k e r fragment has

2 2 . L a d y ' s outfit s o u n d s

m a g i c r i n g . (6)

hairy. (7)

sation,crypt, tantrum,ores, parks,cheap,thief,enate,macdona!d,assisi,indecent.

2 9 . C a m e r o n e x c l a i m s it

2 4 . D o g m o u n t s s h e e p . (6)

Down:

c o n t a i n s d i v a l e n c e . (5)

2 6 . Electronic sheep w a n -

3 0 . M i n i s t r y of D e f e n c e h e s -

d e r s a r o u n d at a w a l k i n g

m o l e , a t t i c , s a h i b , s t e p s , s t o t s , v i a I,el l i p s e , v e r d i , i n d u s t r i a l i -

O r g a s m , d r a k e , c l a s s , m o o r s , t h e s e v e n acts o f m a n , c r a b s , p o t p o u r r i , c h i a n t i , c u s h -

i o n s , p i l a u , mi n t , m i n e e p i e , d a y b r e a k s , ref r a i n , s e t s , t o u g h , s p a d e s , s t e w s , s o c l e , c l o v e , e x a l t . PS. S o r r y a b o u t t h e n a m e c h a n g e s . For that matter: w h o c a r e s ?

T h i s o n e s h o u l d stay.

luv Turnip.

But then, w h o knows?

itates a t e i n s t e i n i u m : it

p a c e . (5)

restrains. (9)

2 8 . O n o m a t o p o e i c stench (3)

Bart s outplayed by skillful IC

Football 4ths G K T IV I C IV

Football - amazingly long report for minor match A n o t h e r m a t c h day, a n o t h e r I m p e r i a l VI

S B L H III

For this, o u r s e c o n d l e a g u e of t h e s e a s o n , bad:

game

the omens

t h e kit briefly

were

forgotten,

with

rain,

were

shortage, there lems

locating

severe

player

even

prob-

ourcoach!

In t h e

of goals

the

of a d i f f e r e n t k i n d , a n d w a s

duly

dom

team

with

odds

ran-

a n d ends

o p e n i n g d a y a n d a hat-trick in a

w a r n e d o f his c o n d u c t by the

m i d w e e k f r i e n d l y , J a m e s is a l r e a d y

eree, who had a competent

game

have

f i l l i n g t h e v o i d left b y t h e

all

Barts

they are a d i v i s i o n b e l o w us, b u t

ture o f U L U

depar-

League G o l d e n

Boot

w i n n e r T o m W i l s o n t o the fifths.

w a l k i n g t h r o u g h H y d e Park in t h e pouring

a couple

The

medics themselves

little u s e o f t h e w i n d y

made

conditions

during the opening period,

every

unimaginative through ball being

round.

Even

s c r a p p e d their five and

reverted

when man

to 4-4-2

ref-

midfield it w a s n o

u s e , w i t h t h e i r a t t a c k p r o v i n g just as

impotent

as before.

l o o k e d d a n g e r o u s o n the throughout

t h e half,

here a n d there - w e s h o u l d really thrashed

yet

another

chances play

this

team

game

a n d dubious

resulted

since

missed midfield

in only t w o g o a l s .

Imperial

T h e first c a m e i n t h e first h a l f w i t h

counter

Javier

with

Luis

having

a speculative

shot

at t h e a w f u l G K T g o a l k e e p e r w h o

e n d it w a s a p a s t i c c i o o f n e w c o m -

either d e a l t with with c o n s u m m a t e

Q u a r a n t a o n the left-wing r u n n i n g

let it c r e e p p a s t h i m i n t o t h e net.

ers, players

e a s e by n e w

centre-back

the

The

Den

and Head,

enths

looted f r o m the sev-

(cheers,

Jamil)

a n d sixth

team veterans w h o t o o k the field a g a i n s t Barts.

Even captain

Mike

Braber

pairing o r else

skidding

o f f t h e w e t turf i n t o t h e

grateful

arms

of keeper

Andy

opposition

whilst D a n

merry

Myatt an d James d i d

likewise upfront. D o u g plied

dance,

Hine

a string o f quality

second

move

came

from a

B o l a p l a y i n g it o u t w i d e t o N i m a

crosses

w h o w h i p p e d a l o w cross into the

Pease, w h o d i d n ' t miss a thing a l l

f r o m t h e r i g h t a n d it is t r u e t o s a y

box that w a s

taking

day.

that the victory w o u l d

Knut f o r his s e c o n d

restoring

of referee,

ex-captain

thus

Rob Daven-

port t o s k i p p e r for the day. H i s first d e c i s i o n - t o k i c k i n t o during the opening 4 5

the w i n d

have

far

comprehensive

h a d it

started, any thoughts of a n S B L H

not

been

f o r the heroics

of the

o n s l a u g h t w e r e l a i d f i r m l y t o rest

o p p o s i t i o n n o . 1.

Wilson

So, a great team

performance

f o l l o w e d u p a string of attempts in

b u r i e d the g h o s t of a few

but by the b r e a k h e w a s fully v i n -

the

ago.

Barts a r e a

t o fire

home the

d i c a t e d , with Imperial c o m i n g in a

loose ball: two-nil. Despite

goal

of t i m e t o d r a w l e v e l , the

This

arrived

after o n e o f m a n y IC b r e a k a w a y s

w e r e never in t h e g a m e

during

point,

t h e first

half,

with

Booth

finally slotting the b a l l h o m e f r o m a

narrow

angle.

with

Towards

goal

of the

missed

Cap-

season. We

desperately

half

months down-

killer instinct a n d great chance ging

after

chance

but nothing

finishing,

went

beg-

was coming

plenty

pour, a r a i n b o w greeted the final

although the forwards, M a x a n d

medics

whistle, hopefully heralding a new

J a v i , ran their hearts out a n d L a u -

past this

d a w n f o r t h e sixth t e a m a f t e r t h e

rie i n t h e s e c o n d h a l f h a d a f e w

d o u r p e r f o r m a n c e s s o far. A t t h e

good

very least, w e t a k e f r o m the

post with a great shot a n d h a d a

Rob stamping out

everything in midfield.

Meanwhile, the

After a s e c o n d

n i c e l y s l o t t e d in by

tain A i d a n B a n k s up front with his

minutes - raised a f e w eyebrows

to the good.

been

W i t h the s e c o n d p e r i o d hardly

as m i d f i e l d p l a y m a k e r D a n

with

sup-

N i k o l i c h w a s unfit t o play, i n s t e a d the role

good

i n t h e first h a l f

early

the e n d o n e of the

o u r first t h r e e p o i n t s o f t h e

game league

few

touches.

good

trys

Peyrouz

at g o a !

hit

the

at other

m e d i c s c o n t e s t e d that the b a l l h a d

frustrated S B L H players resorted to

season a n d a large bout of c o n -

t i m e s b u t h a d t o c o m e off a t half-

r u n o u t o f play.

s o m e s t a m p i n g o f his o w n , t h o u g h

tentment.

time due t o a d o d g y ankle.

already

In f a c t ,

Shotguns at dawn Rifle Shooting At

9.00am

the dregs

of society

siasm.

g a t h e r e d at the Sports centre, y e s

Once

theshooting thing h a d

the R P C w a s g o i n g o n a s h o t g u n

b e e n d o n e w e g o t o n w i t h t h e rest

trip. By 1 0 the d r e g s m o v e d t o the

of the day, a n d t h e c l u b

minibus

a n d a fairly

b e t w e e n the d r u n k s a n d the s h o p -

journey

t o JJ's

uneventful

Shotgunarama

Emporium ensued. On

arrival

pers.

"Several

hours/bargains/

pints later w e b e g a n t o w e n d

a n d after

several

merry

way home.

cups of tea a n d suitable a p p r e c i -

"Stayin'

a t i o n o f the K i n g C h a r l e s p u p p i e s

and

Alive"

a n d Rolf

choreography

i n g . E a c h o f the f o u r g r o u p s

traffic all the way.

well

with

little

shooting varied between

per-

drama

excellent

our

T h e strains o f

the accompanyin g

we g o t o n with the task o f s h o o t -

formed

divided

entertained

Harris dance the

congratulate Dave

Turner

f o r s n a p p i n g his g u n , M a r k

Carter

and enthusiastic. G u y performed

f o r o n c e a g a i n g e t t i n g his f a c e i n

well,

the way, a n d

winning

the men's

trophy

with a s o l i d 3 4 , whilst R a c h e l t o o k h o m e the ladies trophy. A n d t h e

B e n , o u r driver, f o r

his m a n y k i n d t o i l e t s t o p s . If y o u ' d

iike t o c o m e

along

w o o d e n s p o o n w a s jointly s h a r e d

a n d try s h o t g u n s , s h o p p i n g , r i f l e s ,

between Jake and Adeline

archery o r airguns come down to

whose

shooting c o u l d only b e described

the Sports C e n t r e in Princes

as a g r e a t s t e a m i n g pile o f e n t h u -

dens

a n d locate

Gar-

the Projectile

Join up for ICU's newest club - Military Coup Soc H a l l , where you'll find a friendly band

of responsible people w h o

will s h o w y o u h o w t o join u p . T h e Rifle a n d P i s t o l C l u b .

Surprise-disco boys win

Seconds flatten Bart's Men's Rugby

Hockey - Disco Squad IC III

dance

UCL

r h o i d s s l i p p e d a crafty o n e past

style

footwork,

Haemor-

ICII

.. 0

St B a r t ' s

o n d s b e i n g a b o u t 3 5 - 0 u p at half time. After a royal roasting the sec-

the keeper. Over

many

years

Where

glorious

Despite playing what w a s possibly

pol-

o u r worst g a m e in three years, w e

a g i n g t o p u t m a n y tries d o w n u n d e r

in a n

nonetheless destroyed a n o t h e r set

t h e p o s t s . In t h e e n d , t h e s c o r e d i d

hockey IC h a d never beaten U C L

w o u l d surely follow. ished

is.

inspired

leadership

Captain

Casanova,

Under the of stand

The Disco

d r e a m s a n d g a v e the U C L

Rabble

The

mighty

Having

corner

of m e d i c s . W i t h a s i d e that c o n s i s t -

not really s h o w the d o m i n a n c e o f

managed to scramble o n e in.

e d o f o n l y six o f last w e e k ' s s t a r t i n g

seconds

l i n e u p w e s t art e d with a f r e s h , if

being

i n e x p e r i e n c e d line up.

At the e n d ,

With

Filtrum

giving

servicing to anyone, who

good wanted

it, J e s u s s l o t t e d i n a b e a u t y sun medallion

shinning from the offand a

was

o u r short

intensive training s e s s i o n , Filtrum

Boys strolled out o n t o the field o f

a good whipping.

t h e t o p o f t h e D.

After

from

inviting

start, it s o o n

onds that

even

As the sec-

became

the n e w seconds

After

some

serious

nocturnal

inches.

the Sun-

The

by s c o r i n g

from

first try c a m e

The second

half w a s a d m i t -

dance Kid w a s surprisingly active

tedly c r a p with neither t e a m s c o r -

the

and weaved some magic

ing, but w e ' r e 2 9 g o a l s up f r o m 3

proud of, being converted

defence.

While

U C L stood

m e s m e r i s e d by S u n d a n c e ' s

BUSA games.

all-blacks

would

have

that

m a n of match

ended

with

Nick

3 tries a n d a

c a p t a i n T i m C o l l i n s w i t h 2 a n d a try e a c h f r o m J i m S o p p e r , Jeff

Mace,

U g o , and Jan Stephenson. However,

been by J i m

S o p p e r u n d e r the posts.

Nice!

we know

when the

h a r d t e a m s start p l a y i n g us in B U S A w e w i l l n e e d t o i m p r o v e by 4 0 0 %

tries c a m e e v e n t u a l l y w i t h t h e s e c -

River-

150-0

representative.

f r o m G l T i m D e n y e r with 3 , freshers

s o o n after the

w h i s t l e with a p e r i o d o f p l a y

scoreline

t o t a l o f 2 9 p o i n t s . Tries a l s o c a m e

they w e r e p l a y i n g w e l l b e l o w par.

his skill

inevitable.

arse even

Parker

side

all

looked

kick s o m e

with

much

when

could

always

around

clear

himself a l o n g Twat d e m o n s t r a t e d

goal

activity a t t h e w e e k e n d

o n d s d i d n o t i m p r o v e but still m a n -

o n e h a d led more

-until t o d a y that

the

C o m e o n the s e c o n d s .

IN BRIEF Netball

ICSM Hockey I

ICSM I .

RUMS I

St G e o r g e ' s

the St G e o r g e ' s W A w e l l u n d e r c o n -

and

t r o l . A t half t i m e , the s c o r e w a s 9 - 9 .

open.

f e w substitutions

A This f a t i g u i n g m a t c h

ended

both

one goal apiece, a n d o n e dislo-

This

w a s (yet a g a i n )

seriously

with

Becky,

later a n d

the umpire,

muttering

" h o w d o e s this p e n w o r k ? " t h e s e c -

close match. Tight m a r k i n g f r o m S t . G e o r g e ' s

cated shoulder apiece at Pad. Rec.

the i c e packs

17 17

were

broken

A s St G e o r g e ' s h a d n o s u b -

stitutes, w e t o o k t h e o p p o r t u n i t y t o try a n d b u r y

h e r u n d e r a pile o f

c o a t s u n d e r t h e pretext o f k e e p i n g

o n d half g o t u n d e r w a y t o a f u r i o u s

her w a r m , thus r e d u c i n g their t e a m

pace.

Jess

a n d Jane

zoomed

players.

Unfortunately her

T h e skill s h o w n by b o t h s i d e s w a s o f

defence

shading

under

the pretence

but the f i n i s h i n g w a s a t t i m e s w o e -

marking)

meant

that t h e I C g o a l

f u l , c u l m i n a t i n g in a m i s s e d p e n a l t y

flow was reduced to a few outstand-

looking

flick by R U M S in the 6 5 t h m i n u t e .

i n g s h o t s f r o m R e b e k a h a n d S a r a in

ball b o u n c e d in front o f her) a n d dying m o m e n t s o f t h e g a m e , t w o

surprising early

ICSM classic

scored

poacher's

season

quality,

first t h r o u g h

strike f r o m J e z

B o y l e , after a s h o r t c o r n e r

break-

d o w n , a n d t h e n w a s t e d a serie s o f good

(and some

dubious eye of

a r o u n d the c o u r t , a n d t h e d e f e n s i v e

team-mates

combination

(occasionally

her, a n d h e r injury w a s n o t s e r i o u s

rather surprised w h e n t h e

s o s h e w a s a b l e t o p l a y o n . In t h e

about

t h e first half. P a u l a " t h e r o a d r u n n e r "

K a t h r y n in t h e I C c i r c l e , k e p t us i n

quick-fire g o a l s s a w I C d r a w

did

contention. Things were looking up

and

h e r thing, feeding the ball in

a n d a r o u n d the c i r c l e t o set u p t h e

with

s h o o t e r s , a n d a f i r e d u p Kirstie k e p t

George's

13mins to g o when

t h e St.

c e n t r e twisted h e r a n k l e

claim

a well-deserved

Well played everyone!

level draw.

Next time

WIN!

o u r football w a s sadly Kee-

o p p o r t u n i t i e s t o kill o f f t h e

g a m e . A f t e r the restart t h e R U M S ' centre

of Alex

d i d not forget

Men's Football (5ths)

midfield b e g a n t o take a n

ominous stranglehold o n the midf i e l d , until f o r t u i t o u s l y f o r I C S M h e

Kings V

a g o a l early o n , w h e n their striker

But

d i s l o c a t e d his s h o u l d e r , f o u l i n g i n

IC V

(the c o c k i e s t b a s t a r d e v e r

gen-esq

centrefield.

N o t to b e outdone,

known)

a n d they

managed

c o l l e c t e d t h e ball a n d sent a l o w

f l u k e a g o a l b a c k t o m a k e it 2 - 2

shot into the corner. K i n g s l o o k e d

at h al f t i m e .

N i c k K eys el l w e n t a n d p o p p e d his

After a p o o r

shoulder out attempting a powerful

l e a g u e o n Saturday, losing 2-0 t o

like a t e a m w h o e x p e c t e d t o w i n

c l e a r a n c e , a n d in the e n s u i n g c o n -

LSE V I , w e n e e d e d a b o o s t i n this

1 0-0 with e a s e . But IC V n e v e r lie

h a l f s t a r t e d . T h i s w a s h a n d y , a s it

fusion

game

from the

d o w n (except in the b a r at the e n d

allowed

start o u r

of the night) a n d w e c a m e s t o r m -

c o m p l e t e h i s h a t trick with a n e a t

Nick's

s c o r e d with disarray.

opposite

ICSM

number

still i n t a c t i c a l

tense

minutes

against

division league

performance

above

a team to kick

campaign.

in t h e

Once

the

ing b a c k with a great finish f r o m

back

and

r e m a i n e d as both sides attempted

opposition

to s p u r n a s m a n y c h a n c e s a s p o s -

their o w n g r o u n d , a n d sorted o u t

now playing some great football,

sible, a n d w h e n the final

which

with e v e n W i l l " G O D "

blew both teams

whistle

left t o lick t h e i r

had managed

o n e of them

to find

was captain,

After

"Mahatma"

Gandy.

W e were

( o r is t h a t

great late

the break,

the second

o u rresident dinosaur to

header

into t h e t o p corner,

another move

fine

finish

after

d o w n t h e left.

consolation

made

Kings

it 4 - 3 a t

the g a m e g o t u n d e r w a y , with K i n g s

"DOG")

wounds and rebuke themselves for

l o o k i n g like a b u n c h o f thugs w h o

game.

their o w n wastefulness

might know how t o play football.

after their k e e p e r f u m b l e d a save,

c a l l a halt early.. . C o m e o n K i n g s ,

really

t a k e it, t a k e it!

goal.

in front of

started

badly,

conceding

D o w b o r getting into t h e The second

goal

pissing the cocky

came

gits o f f .

the e n d , but they k n e w they w e r e w e l l b e a t e n , e v e n a s k i n g the ref t o

SCOREBOARD

Football firsts double up QMW HOCKEY

Men's Football QMW

IC I

3 (BUSA)

corner from Warren was smashed

O n a windy Saturday

into the net f r o m the h e a d of o n -

strong Q M W s q u a d .

form Foulstone.

Q M W equalised

ICSM 1

1 -1

RUMS 1

I C III

4 - 0

UCL

QMW 1

i C faced a FOOTBALL

W e f a c e d t h e w i n d i n t h e first

IC 1

3 - 2

W e d n e s d a y s a w the return o f the

a g a i n w h e n a p a r r i e d shot fell t o

half a n d , a s e x p e c t e d , w e r e u n d e r

I C IV

2 - 0

GKT

firsts t o C h i s l e h u r s t , a p l a c e

t h e feet

thecosh.

IC V

4 - 3

Kings 3

I C VI

2 - 0

S B L H III

are g r o w i n g t o l o v e !

of their

who made

From the kick-off, n o q u a r t e r

Q M W

a few golden opportuni-

back of Chris, J a m i e a n d particularly D a v e kept o u t the threat, In t h e s e c o n d h a l f it w a s a dif-

IC 1

SBLH 1

half a m e s m e r i s i n g run f r o m m i d -

boots: Latching o n to a h e a d e r from

every time w e h a d the ball a n d ,

I C II

74 - 0

S B L H II

f i e l d by Steve w a s r e w a r d e d w h e n

A l e x , W a r r e n ' s exquisite l o b left the

after

IC V i r g i n s 2 0

he w a s b r o u g h t d o w n in t h e b o x :

Q M W keeper stranded.

chances,

Penalty. who

U p stepped

Foulstone

slotted the spot kick c o o l l y

into the b o t t o m c o r n e r . The

second

half

saw Q M W

Impressive

made

at the

f e r e n t story, w e l o o k e d t h r e a t e n i n g

M i d - w a y t h r o u g h t h e first

ties a n d they w e r e

But, the three

t o pay

given

pitch.

of the

n o mistake.

striker

w h e n Dirty W a r r e n f o u n d his s c o r i n g

was

in a n y area

wasted

grateful

debut

dug

Undeterred, IC

in a n d earned

deserved

second

goal

well-

when

spurned

a few

a n d Jamie

had

Kings

his

performances

p e n a l t y s a v e d by t h e Q M W k e e p -

BADMINTON

from Alistair a n d D a i , contributed to

er, w e t o o k t h e l e a d t h a n k s t o a

IC 1

6 - 3

QMW

another

Foulstone free-kick (crap keeper).

IC W o m e n

0 - 9

Kings

well-polished display from

t h e firsts.

Scouse

hit b a c k w h e n t h e I C d e f e n c e w a s finally b r e a c h e d .

Warren

RUGBY

death 0

Juan,

ICI

courageous

(ULU League)

us n e a r t h e

a n d the midfield of Steve,

Q M W I

saved

Dan,

Phil Rich

a n d captain held

out f o r a

BASKETBALL IC M e n

5 0 - 71

GKT

IC W o m e n 5 4 - 2 4 G K T

w e l l - d e s e r v e d victory. NETBALL IC I

Opposition rolled over by IC virgins

1 4 - 1 4 St G e o r g e s

SQUASH I C II

2 - 3

KCL

Ladies Rugby IC Virgins

2 0

King's

IC Virgins GKT

(Wed 27th)

the scrums o u t , a n d started r u c k i n g

a n d m a u l i n g properly. After a l o n g

(Sat 2 3 r d )

period

of tight d e f e n c e

A l t h o u g h it w a s a h a r d g a m e w e

H a v i n g lost a l a r g e n u m b e r o f 1st

a n d many

triumphed

choice

t h r o u g h t o s c o r e a try.

Arse!

a n d kicked

King's

T h e start w a s g r u l i n g

but

players

w e went

into

the

m a t c h w i t h a little t r e p i d a t i o n , a s

scrums,

The second

half

Betsy

broke

started

with

w e k e p t it i n t h e i r h a l f a n d R o m y

w e b e a t G K T in a h a r d f o u g h t f i n a l

even m o r e pressure f r o m G K T , but

b r o k e t h r o u g h t o s c o r e h e r first o f

last year.

a well p l a c e d high kick f r o m Romy,

4 tries! King's

It c a n n o t b e d e n i e d t h a t d i d get a

try b u t they

None

t h e less w e f o u g h t t h e

rain a n d a slippery ball, a n d h a d a

w o r k e d h a r d a n d it w a s t h e i r first

p r o m i s i n g start.

a n d last, s o after w e s c o r e d o u r

Carianne

t h i r d try w e f o r g a v e scrums were loosing most

them.

nasty with

ground

of their

but C a d g y scrums,

The

us o f t e n stole

A n e a r l y try f r o m

set o u r spirits h i g h a n d

demoralised

the already

weary

o u r line

were never up to standard. stole

our bal! and

outs

crashed

putting t h e backs

f e e l i n g very c o n f i d e n t .

the w r o n g f o o t , a n d they

onto

scored,

H o w e v e r , a q u i c k start f r o m

Romy

into their 2 2 . T h e pressure eventu-

was chased d o w n a n d quick han-

mauls,

ally

dling

some

sprints by t h e b a c k s .

excellent

told

o n them

a n d excellent

This m a y be

hands f r o m the backs a l l o w e d Ali B

d u e t o J o with

h e r w a r cry a n d

t o p u t a l ! t h o s e p i z z a s t o g o o d use

viscous

scaring

a n d p o w e r o v e r f o r a 2 n d try.

ways

King's

players.

game,

but the team

off the

It w a s a h a r d

together and we w o n !

pulled

F o r t h e rest o f t h e half, t h i n g s t i g h t e n ed u p a n d a h a r d fight followed.

Finally the forwards sorted

allowed

Carriane

white s p a c e :

They

m a d e u p g r o u n d in t h e r u c k s a n d plus

Anytime.

A n d n o w s o m e entertaining

Unfortunately,

through,

F r o m t h e re-start w e w e r e b a c k

Wednesday evening.

c h a s e d by Betsy, r e s u l t e d in a r u n a w a y try.

G K T . Ro m y c o n v e r t e d t o leave us

a n dwe

Sports reports.

by G K T ,

think that deserves a n e n c o r e

to score

again. T h e p r e s s u r e m o u n t e d still further, b u t w i t h c l e v e r w o r k f r o m t h e forwards, Ali B m a n a g e d to score u n d e r the posts, t a k i n g of the o v e r l a p .

advantage

Romy converted.

Nice.