THE EASTER BUNNY READS MORE LETTERS

Dear Easter Bunny: Long time no see! Whatcha been doing all year long?

Dear Nearsighted: Eating, breathing, and breeding. What about you? …Never mind. I don’t want to picture that. Next letter. Quickly!

Dear Easter Bunny: Do you like Reese’s candy renditions of you? Seems to me that they just melt the unused candy from the prior holiday and then reshape it to icons of the current holiday. Like you would have been reformed from a Valentine heart. Of course, from an business standpoint, that’s a smart thing to do.

Dear Smart: First, I have never modelled for a candy company. At this point, I’m owed billions of dollars in name-and-likeness revenues. Second, you’ve forgotten that between Valentine Days in February and Easter Sundays in April there’s National Surgical Implant Awareness Month, which is March. That might explain some of the shapes you find while eating all the sugar and fat in that candy. And, if you’re going to eat those highly processed food products, then you should worry less about those shapes and more about your own. Of course, that wasn’t your question, as it? Actually, you asked no question. I’m moving on.

Dear Easter Bunny: I feel that I’ve had a woefully deprived childhood. Historically, here in Australia we never celebrate Easter as children. Why is that?

Dear Deprived: Between your large populations of platypus and echidna, there should be enough authentic egg-laying mammals on your island to keep your kids and joeys happy. Time to leave the pouch and get on with adulthood, mate!

Dear Easter Bunny: Do baby rabbits eat baby carrots?

Dear Baby Eater: No. We eat totally organic and natural produce. We have no association whatsoever with human food inventions like baby carrots. Or Cocoa Puffs.

Dear Easter Bunny: Why has the rabbit foot become the worldwide symbol of good luck?

Dear Footnote: Because pig feet are edible, chicken feet are frightening, armadillo feet carry leprosy, and human feet are just plain ugly. It’s also probably illegal in your selfcentered society to carry a dried human foot around your neck or on your keychain.

Dear Easter Bunny: After many years of fighting a losing battle with your species, I am willing to share my garden equitably with you. If I plant rows of green beans in a 12-foot by 12-foot plot, how much of the 120 square-feet of beans can you eat?

Dear Green Bean: All of it. However, 12 feet times 12 feet is 144 square feet. You should learn to multiply like rabbits.

Dear Easter Bunny: I ask this as humanely possible. What’s a good recipe for rabbit stew?

Dear Humane: I answer this as lapinely possible. First, you make a roux. Use a nicesized stovetop pot. Add your favorite spices—and don’t be afraid to add a good bit of them or else it’s just gonna taste like chicken. Add bone broth or vegetable stock--or even chicken stock at risk of masking true flavor--and bring contents to a full, rolling mushrooms we’ve eaten.

Dear Easter Bunny: Far out! That is so cool, man.

Dear Hippie: Sometimes it’s downright groovy, brother. Peace out. POV

Louisiana Boulettes & Balloons Festival

March 31- April 1

Oak Ridge Park, Golden Meadow

A “balloon glow” will be held from 5-10 p.m. on Friday, March 31 to kick off the event, and the festival will continue on Saturday, April 1 from 10 a.m. - 10 p.m. Both days will feature delicious bayou food, drinks, games, and live music for people to enjoy, as well as local artisans showing and selling creations at craft booths.

‘Colinda: The Cajun Cinderella’

April 1, 6 p.m.

Thibodaux High School

Broadway on the Bayou Performing Arts presents ‘Colinda: The Cajun Cinderella,’ an original play. Featuring a cast of local kids, the play is set at the annual Thibodaux Fireman’s Fair, where Colinda loses her shrimp boot in the mud after dancing with the handsome Grand Marshal– which he must use to find the mysterious girl he fell in love with on the ferris wheel. Tickets may be purchased at the door.

Thibodaux Regional Health System presents the first Festival of Hope event! It consists of three special events designed to offer hope and inspiration as well as honor cancer survivors and their families.

Festival of Hope Golf Classic

April 13, 8 a.m. - 12 p.m.

Ellendale Golf Club, Houma

The event will take place rain or shine, and feature special guest Mike Detillier.

Festival of Hope Run for the Ribbons

April 15, 10 a.m. – 12 p.m.

Thibodaux Regional Cancer Institute

The event will include a 1 Mile Fun Run/ Walk, 5K Fun Run/Walk, and a survivor celebration. Special Guest Sylvia Masters, Miss Louisiana USA 2023 will also be in attendance.

Festival of Hope Concert for the Cause

April 15, 1:30–5 p.m.

Thibodaux Regional Sports Complex

The event will feature Up and Coming Music Artist Kenedi Anderson and Soul Survivors.

Ladybug Ball

April 22, 10 a.m. – 2 p.m.

South Louisiana Wetlands Discovery Center, 86 Valhi Blvd., Houma

The Ladybug Ball is a family-friendly event that celebrates the diverse environment that exists along the bayous of Southeast Louisiana. This event enables students to learn about the benefits of particular insects while participating in hands-on activities focusing on the protection and preservation of the environment.

Pirates & Boots Festival

April 22, 11 a.m. – 6 p.m.

Downtown Houma Marina

Keep Terrebonne Beautiful will hold a celebration in conjunction with Keep Louisiana’s Beautiful Love the Boot Week. The celebration will offer vendor booths, music, activities for kids, and food. There will also be a Jean Lafitte look-alike contest and a treasure hunt! The event will celebrate our bayou heritage while raising money to further the mission of Keep Terrebonne Beautiful.

Relay for Life

Terrebonne Parish

April 22, 3–10 p.m.

Barry P. Bonvillain Civic Center, Houma Relay for Life of Terrebonne Parish will host their annual event. This year’s theme is Survivor: Together We Will Survive. The event will bring awareness to cancer and fundraising to assist survivors and their family in our community. This is a family fun event with a purpose, and is open to everyone. POV