San Antonio Beacon October 2016 by The Beacon

Every person on the planet questions their worth and their significance Page 8

One More Thing Your Family Needs To Add To Its Schedule Nothing might be the moments and the memories your family cherishes for a lifetime PG 4

To Raise a Daughter We Must Be On Let’s face it, we’re just not at our best when we’re tired and ready for bed. At the end of the day, she wants all any of us really want — to be loved, to be known and to know we belong. PG 9

LIVE AN

October 2016

Serving San Antonio and the Surrounding Communities Since 2001

VOL.16 — NO. 10

ORIGINAL

LIFE

Marriage Destroyer When we think we deserve something we’re not getting we can be downright nasty about it. PG 15

Tune in Saturdays at Noon Steve Teel hosts local and national difference makers who share their stories and insights to give you hope, inspiration, and change. PG 17

Sadie Robertson Beacon Radio Interview pg 2

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ENTERTAINMENT

Beacon Radio Interview with Sadie Robertson more listeners may not know. The very popular You know her from Duck Dynasty. You Sadie Robertson paid know her from "Dancing With the Stars." the Beacon Radio a You know her as an author. You know her as visit, and spoke about what she is doing in life a movie star. You know her as an entrepreHost Steve Teel these days. Here is an neur. You know her as a missionary. My Steve@saBeacon.com excerpt from the great goodness, you're 19 years old, Sadie? interview, and how she uses her platform to Sadie: Yes sir! inspire others! Steve: How are you doing all of these Steve Teel: This is Beacon Radio. Today incredible things? is exciting listeners. Do you know "Duck Sadie: [laughs] That's a good question. I Dynasty"? Of course you do, right? We're have a really good team behind me, and going to talk to a difference maker from that really good family, and family, of this young generation. Sadie Roba really good God. If I ertson is going to join us today. She's on the didn't have those two things, than trust me, I line with us. Sadie, how are you doing would not be anything. today? It takes a team. Sadie Robertson: I am great! and I'm Steve: Awesome. happy to be talking to you. Let's talk about Live Original, first of all. We Steve: Come one, that's really sweet. You didn't have to say that, but I'm glad you could be talking about the book, but let's talk about the tour. Why don't you tell us did. about the Live Original tour and how it Sadie: Yeah. No, they told me to say came about. How did God put this on your that before. heart? I want to hear about it all. Steve: I love it. All right, Sadie Robertfor August 2016 Sadie: It's kind of funny, and was hard son, you’re knownProposed from about aAdvertisement thousand to explain [at first]. I've had this vision from different things, and there's a thousand

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God about the Live Original tour. It hadn't been done before, a tour like this. That never even crossed my mind until people started asking me, "So what is it?" and I was like, "Huh. Good question. I don't really know." Now, of course, we've narrowed it down, and we can explain. It is a true two and a half hours of motivation, of encouragement, of accountability, of positivity. I know that that's something that the world is missing out in today. There's a lot of stuff that is talked about that's negative, or it's all politics, or it's all this or that, arguments. This is something that we felt was more important than to just put on Instagram, or to put on Facebook, or put on Twitter, just do a video on it, or even write a book. This is something so important to us that we want to go out and be right in front of you, tell you, encourage you, and speak truth into your life. That's kind of where it all started. We hope to do it for many years. It's the first. I don't know. We'll see. I feel like God is really blessing this tour, and God has obviously written this in our plan. We're excited about it. I can't believe it's actually happening. It's one of those things you work on for so long, and then it's here, and you're like, "Wait, what? I never thought this was actually going to happen." It's crazy. Steve: Right. Oh, man, that is crazy. Go back to how did God first put it on your heart? Were you sitting around? Were you going for a run? What was going on, and then you just thought, "We've got to do this event?" How did that play out? Sadie: After Dancing with the Stars, it was kind of that thing, "What am I going to do next?" People were pulling me in a million different directions, and I was like, "You know, acting is really cool. It's awesome, but that's not my passion." My passion is to speak and to motivate, to encourage, and stuff like that. I started speaking at different events and venues, and then I was like, "I think that I could do my own thing." My mom was like, "Wait, what?" I was like, "No, no, no, really." I began to pray about it, and it was like God made it so clear on what exactly that was, what it looked like, and who was to be a part of it. Getting down to the little details of crazy, serendipity things that happened,

that people came up and ended up being a part of the tour now, because they said one thing that was something that I knew it should be. It was weird. A lot of weird things happened for it all to come together, and then it just happened. Steve: And this is all about being yourself. You can pretend you're someone you're not, and to really come back and live original, which is such a great phrase, great book title, great tour title. I love that. Where does that come from again, Live Original? Where's that come from, Sadie? Sadie: It's funny. Whenever I was young, I used to preach to my parents on the table when I was literally five years old. Steve: What?! Sadie: My dad (Willie Robertson) was like, "What is wrong with you?" and so he nicknamed me "the original." Throughout my whole life, he would always call me the original. If he would see anything with the word original on it, he would buy it for me. He would tell me, remind me, "Sadie, you started preaching whenever you were five years old. Never let that die. Remember that this is your original life, it’s your purpose that God gave you." Which is really crazy that he did that, because whenever he was saying that, we didn't really have a big platform or anything. I had the people at school and people that I ran into, but nothing like Duck Dynasty or Dancing with the Stars. It was crazy how I feel like God was already preparing me, even when I was five years old, for Live Original. [laughs] It's really weird. Steve: Five years old, you were preaching. I wonder what you were preaching about? My gosh, I wish they had that on video. Sadie: There actually is a video. It's on YouTube, and it's really weird, because I said, "And even if I'm famous one day, I'm not going to think about myself. I'm giving it to God." Then I started cheering, and I said, "Let's give it up for God." It was really funny. Steve: That’s hilarious. What an incredible message that you're going to have, that you have for this generation. We're so grateful that you are living original, and from the time you were five, preaching. Amazing… Well that's Sadie Robertson. Sadie, thank you so much for being with us. Sadie: Yeah, it was great to talk to everybody!

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FAMILY

One More Thing Your Family Needs To Add To Its Schedule BY FREDDIE ALBAUGH

Sometimes I feel like Cinderella. Before you revoke my man card, hear me out. Cinderella was held captive by the unrealistic and relentless demands of her evil stepsisters. She was constantly going from here to there trying to meet the needs and expectations of others. It was exhausting, discouraging, and could have even been debilitating. If I were Cinderella, my “stepsisters” would be all the “important” things on my calendar. Those things that pull me in opposing directions. “Go to work, Cinderella.” “Mow the lawn, Cinderella.” “Take me there, Cinderella.” “Help with my homework, Cinderella.” Who (or what) are your “stepsis-

PUBLISHER: Full Armor Media CONTENT DIRECTORS: Pam Leslie ADVERTISING COORDINATOR: Blake Clifton COMMUNICATION SPECIALIST: Todd Reid COMMUNITY MANAGER: Blake Clifton CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: Amanda Graves, Jim Faulk, Kirk Freeman, Lauren Robertson THE BEACON OFFICE: P.O. Box 591490 San Antonio, Texas 78259 PH: (210) 614-8884 FAX: (210) 614-8885 ONLINE: www.saBeacon.com MISSION STATEMENT To deliver hope, inspiration and change happening all around us through relevant articles from local and national writer, news sources, and Beacon staff. We strive to be recognized as the forum for family-oriented community events and activities, directories for area churches, schools, charities, businesses, and camps.

ters?” Work? Volunteering? Home improvements? Church? PTSA? Aren’t you getting tired, just thinking of your “evil stepsisters?” So many people get up every morning, look at their schedules and are emotionally drained before they even step out the door. What I have found to be even more discouraging is most advice I’ve received is “simply” eliminate the unimportant stuff from my schedule. But everything seems so important! How do we choose? I do not fault families who veg out after long days at work and school in front of a TV show, in a book, or on the web instead of engaging with one another. Most of us are spent at the day’s end and often we feel there is nothing meaningful left to give. What if I told you there is one more thing you should add to your schedule? What if that one more thing could change your entire day-to-day experience? What if that one more thing was nothing? I am not speaking metaphorically. Don’t just add anything else to your life... Literally, schedule “nothing” into your life. Pull out your device or calendar, find an hour on a weeknight and a couple hours on the weekend and write down the word “nothing.” During this time, I suggest your family does what mine does: turn off the TV, put away

phones, tablets, and other distractions. There will be no planned activities, places to be, or chores done. You may be thinking, “Yeah, right!” And I have to admit, for the first 15-30 minutes you may meet resistance, especially if you have kids. You could hear things like: Why are we doing this? You are so mean! I am so bored! I want a snack! Did I tell you how

bored I am right now? Are we becoming Amish? *Side note: Wives don’t be surprised if your husbands try to use this Nothing Time to be “romantic.” *wink* Husbands, if your wives try to use this time to be “romantic,” I have 3 suggestions: First, thank God! Second, take full advantage of the opportunity that has been presented to you. Third, go out and buy a lottery ticket because you are on a lucky streak and you need to ride this wave as far as it will take you. (Just kidding, but seriously...) Despite the complaints and resistance, don’t be surprised when nothing becomes something. Nothing can quickly turn into an unplanned family game night, a bike ride or walk around the block, playing in the backyard or a coloring session with your little one. During times of nothing, something takes place; things like great conversation and positive experiences. These moments could be the things on your schedule that actually breathe new life into your family. These moments could be the things on your schedule that reduce stress rather than create emotional drains. Who knows, nothing might be the moments and the memories your family cherishes for a lifetime. Are you feeling a little like Cinderella, too? Then add one more thing to your already demanding life - nothing. Freddie Albaugh is the Marriage & Family/ Small Groups Pastor of Hope Church in Memphis, Tennessee.

Program Guide

Thank You Pastor, Today, we want to say thank you, for how you walk in truth, to share God’s Word. Thank you for the time you spend, the hours you gladly give, unfolding of God’s perfect way the only way to live.

AM 630 KSLR would like to especially thank all of our local Pastoral Programmers for the tireless work they do throughout the year. Listen on AM 630 KSLR weekdays at 11:30am

October Ministry of the Month: Hope for the Heart With June Hunt Hop e For The Heart is a m inistry provid ing biblical hope and practical he lp for everyday problems.

MONDAY - FRIDAY SATURDAY

October is Pastor Appreciation Month!

SUNDAY

For tickets visit KSLR.com/Chonda

Christian Teaching & Talk Seven Days a Week 6:00am 6:30am 7:00am 7:30am 8:00am 8:30am 9:00am 9:30am 10:00am 10:30am 11:00am 11:30am 12:00pm 12:30pm 1:00pm 1:15pm 1:30pm 2:00pm 2:30pm 3:00pm 4:00pm 5:00pm 5:30pm 6:00pm 6:15pm 6:30pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 9:00pm 10:30pm 11:00pm

Thru The Bible Renewing Your Mind Truth For Life Focus On The Family Insight For Living Leading The Way Family Life Today Grace To You Turning Point Pathway To Victory Jay Sekulow Live Hope For The Heart John Hagee Today Somebody Loves You Messianic Perspectives Key Life Real Life Radio Chris Brown’s True Stewardship Living God Ministries The Eric Metexas Show The Word to Stand of for Life Maranatha Bible Church Richard Ellis Talks Grace Revealed Hope For Life Calvary Current Focus On The Family The Word On Investing Turning Point Pentecostes Sigue su Marcha Hope in the Night

J. Vernon McGee R.C. Sproul Alistair Begg Jim Daly Chuck Swindoll Michael Youssef Dennis Rainey John MacArthur David Jeremiah Robert Jeffress Jay Sekulow June Hunt John Hagee - Cornerstone Church Raul Ries Gary Hedrick Steve Brown Sean Azzaro - River City Chris Brown Aaron Budjen Eric Metaxas Ron Arbaugh - Calvary Chapel Rander Draper - Maranatha Bible Church Richard Ellis J.D. Link - Abundant Grace Steve Leavitt Bunjee Garrett- Calvary South Austin Jim Daly David Mitchell David Jeremiah George Weber - Templo Pentecostal June Hunt

7:00am 7:30am 8:00am 8:30am 9:00am 9:30am 10:30am 11:00am 12:00pm 1:00pm 1:30pm 1:45pm 2:30pm 3:00pm 4:00pm 4:30pm 5:00pm 5:30pm 6:00pm 7:00pm 7:30pm 8:00pm 9:00pm 9:30pm

Paws And Tails Adventures in Odyssey High Resolution Kathleen Whitten Ministries KSLR’s Church Of The Week Pray San Antonio The Cross At Kerrville Hill Country Institute Live Beacon Radio Digging Deeper Believers In Business Believing the Bible Real Life Radio The Word On Investing Discover Your Destiny Rehoboth Voice Prophetic Voice Of Our Time RCCG Salvation Center Focus On the Family Weekend Town Hall Weekend Journal Maranatha Bible Church Steve Brown ETC His Life Ministries Pray San Antonio

Insight For Living Focus On The Family Kurt Hudspeth Kathleen Whitten Baron Wiley Elieen Vincent - City Reachers Max Greiner Larry Linenschmidt Steve Teel Gary Johnson KSLR Scott Lane & Terry Read Sean Azzaro - River City David Mitchell Philip Sundar Johnson Varkey Mike & Cris Sosso - Freedom Fellowship Dr. Adekoye Sanni - RCCG Salvation Center John Fuller Hugh Hewitt Rander Draper - Maranatha Bible Church Steve Brown Todd Grainger Eileen Vincent & Natalie Hardy

7:00am 7:30am 8:00am 8:30am 9:00am 10:00am 10:30am 12:00pm 12:30pm 1:00pm 1:30pm 2:00pm

Calvary Current Road To Reality Richard Ellis Talks Living Your Best Life Bible Baptist Hour Revival Ministry Grace To You - Weekend Kathleen Whitten Ministries High Resolution KSLR’s Church Of The Week Leading the Way - Weekend His Life Revealed

Bunjee Garrett - Calvary South Austin K.P. Yohannan Richard Ellis Les Hollon - Trinity Baptist Lasserre Bradley Jr. GD Coppedge John MacArthur Kathleen Whitten Kurt Hudspeth - Four Winds Baron Wiley Michael Youssef Todd Grainger - His Life Ministries

2:30pm

Digging Deeper

Gary Johnson

3:00pm

Turning Point Weekend

David Jeremiah

3:30pm 4:00pm 5:00pm 5:30pm 7:00pm 8:00pm 8:30pm

The Word On Investing The Cross at Kerrville Phophetic Voice Of Our Time RCCG Salvation Center Abortion Hurts God Heals Pure Sex Radio Richard Ellis Talks

David Mitchell Max Greiner Mike & Cris Sosso - Freedom Fellowship Dr. Adekoye Sanni - RCCG Salvation Center Saundra Decker & Virginia Lange Jonathan, Stephen, & Lee Richard Ellis

9:00pm

The Bible Live Quiz Show

Soapy Dollar

10:30pm Pray San Antonio 11:00pm The Christian Outlook

Eileen Vincent - City Reachers Don Kroah

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EDUCATION

assault, I can confidently say as a freshman girl at Baylor University, I am not afraid. During my first week of collegiate life, the It’s On Us initiative informed students of necessary precautions to prevent interpersonal violence. While the list is exhaustive, I by LAUREN ROBERTSON, Beacon Intern took note of precautions. And honestly, most of them seemed like common sensedon’t drink the punch, don’t go to parties “For every 1,000 women attending colalone, always let people know where you lege or university, there are 35 incidents of are… Having that sense of knowing what is rape each academic year.” This alarming out there and what form or report posted on the National shape sexual abuse may take Sexual Violence Resource Cen- During my first gives me confidence to know ter’s (NSVRC) website further week of collegiate where to venture- or not to went on to claim that less than throughout my col5% of these rape cases were life, the It’s On Us venturelege years. reported to law enforcement. The Rape, Abuse, and Amidst the various forms of initiative informed Incest National Network’s social injustices plaguing our students of neces(RAINN) website states, “Colcommunities, sexual violence lege campuses can give you a sary precautions to proves to be an ever-present sense of security—a feeling threat. With recent sexual prevent interperthat everyone knows each assault scandals at Baylor Uniother and watches out for one versity, people asked if I would sonal violence. another. There are perpetrareconsider my choice to attend. tors who take advantage of Truth is, Baylor is not the first this feeling of safety and security to commit or the last campus to experience cases of acts of sexual violence. ” rape and irresponsible debauchery. While Proposed Advertisement for September 2016 No one ever intends to be a victim of NSVRC.org reports that freshman and sophsexual harassment or rape. A side less disomores are at a greater risk of sexual

Its on YOU

“Impacting the World One Plate at a Time.”

cussed in sexual assault forums is the responsibility of the victims. While it proves critical as a bystander to intervene in situations where someone is physically uncomfortable, it proves equally important for girls to take precautionary measures for themselves. As a girl, I understand I am physically incapable of defending myself against a larger and stronger man. Being so, I will avoid putting myself in threatening situations at all costs. All in all, girls need to hold themselves to a higher standard. While it may be difficult to say no to drinking or avoiding certain parties, it is doable. I can attest by personal experience. Keep in mind the potential consequences and use that as motivation to make wiser choices. Always be aware. People will take advantage if given the opportunity; eliminate that chance.

IT’SONUS.org’s mission statement centralizes on: “inviting everyone to step up and realize that the solution begins with us… sexual assault is not only a crime committed by a perpetrator against a victim, but a societal problem in which all of us have a role to play …Raising awareness. Holding ourselves and each other accountable. Looking out for someone who cannot consent. IT’S ON US. All of us.” More importantly, it’s on YOU. BIO: Lauren Robertson is a recent graduate of San Antonio Christian Schools. She served as Editor-in- Chief of her school’s magazine, the Revelation. She is currently attending Baylor University where she is continuing her passion for medicine, business, and writing.

MARRIAGE

Time To Call It A Night when we’re tired and ready for bed. Working on a solution is going to be difficult at best and then you wake up fuzzy and grumpy Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger. Ephesians 4:26 the next morning from lack of sleep. Far wiser to snuggle up, reaffirm your ESV love (set down any anger), and make plans Early in our marriage Paul and I would to meet and talk through stay up late working problem at a time through our disagreeLet’s face it, we’re just not the when you are both ments, sometimes into the awake and calm. If you wee hours of the morning. at our best when we’re a habit of this, you We misunderstood this tired and ready for bed. make both wind up feeling scripture and thought it respected and assured meant we had to solve the problem will get dealt with (which every difficulty in our marriage before our makes it easier to set down the anger and heads hit the pillow. snuggle in). Time to Call It a Night - Set down your Prayer Prompt: Ask God to help you set anger and work on the problems tomorrow. down any anger you have with your spouse If you look carefully at the scripture, it before bedtime. says deal with your anger quickly. It doesn’t Lori Byerly is a wife, mother and grandsay you have to figure out what to do with mother. You can visit her writing at www. your area of disagreement. the-generous-wife.com. Let’s face it, we’re just not at our best BY LORI BYERLY

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BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT

Southwest Exteriors by BLAKE CLIFTON, Beacon Community Manager, Blake@saBeacon.com

the time of transition, they want to stay Businesses around the city are committing their efforts to much more than simply true to the excellence they are known for. With an eight year track record of a 99% making a profit. Southwest Exteriors has 5-star track record, consistency is as imporexciting updates for their clientele, as well as the entire community. We sat down with tant as important. At the same time, they Steve McNary, their primary team leader, to are always looking at ways to get better. Missional work is not something Steve hear how their team is making the city, and his team bring up or brag about. They country, and world a better place. did share a bit to us, in order to get a winSteve joined the company to transition dow (no pun intended) into how Southwest their business model from an owner-led Exteriors employees serve. model to a team-led model. Every Sunday morning, a The leader of the business, These guys operate team goes into the comScott Barr, is taking on a visionary role at Southwest. around two words: love munity and mows widows’ lawns, lays flooring, and “Scott has big plans of col- and excellence. Treat do other odd jobs in laboration for the city.” everything and everyone neighborhoods. “People in Operations are moving to kinds of neighborhoods teams that Steve McNary is with love, as well as exe- all are hurting, not just lowheading up. So what are these guys cute their workmanship income ones.” Homes are built in Mexico by guys on doing to make this world a staff as well. Another team better place? At first glance, at the highest level. of six guys dug trenches Southwest Exteriors and laid pipe to add water supplies in social replaces windows, doors, and sighting. The areas of Honduras. second layer of most companies asks “how If you want to partner with Southwest do we do business?” These guys operate Exteriors for Kingdom work, reach out to around two words: love and excellence. Treat everything and everyone with love, as Southwest Exteriors and share with them your thoughts and visions, or hear from well as execute their workmanship at the them about what they see in the city while highest level. Southwest is very focused on they improve the homes in the area. keeping their work simple yet precise, What do you do in the workplace? Winwhich explains their efficiency week in and dows and doors aren’t necessarily a spiritual week out. The third and final layer is their calling, but that’s exactly what Southwest purpose, or why they exist. “Our purpose is Exteriors and Renewal by Anderson have to transform lives by transforming homes made it. Let us keep our purpose in every for the glory of God.” This is a kingdom minded company, not a Christian one. With state of life, as these men and women do.

COMMUNITY

Lutheran High School Students Love Daily Bread BY ABBEY PENTON

Student Writers Program The Beacon has an exciting new program to watch out for… Our Student Writers Initiative. The young people in the community are getting out in the community and sharing their stories of service, as

well as spotlighting different ministries and organizations in San Antonio and the surrounding areas. Read about Lutheran High School’s experience this past month!

On Friday, September 16th, the desks at Lutheran High School of San Antonio were empty, along with the hallways, computer lab, and cafeteria. Hill Country Daily Bread Ministries, however, was filled the high school students from Lutheran. We spent our time sorting clothes, weighing beans, and placing Bible verses on assorted goods. We arrived early in the morning with the teachers, and spent several hours volunteering in various areas of the complex. This is our second time returning to help Hill Coun-

try Daily Bread, whose mission is to transform communities and the lives of those in need, through the love of Christ. Senior LHS student Jeremy Reusch exclaimed, “It was amazing to see how much the facility had changed and grown since we last visited…. We had a blast helping out!” Everyone involved felt it was a rewarding experience, and many of us will be going back to help soon. If you have a story to tell, share it at editorial@sabeacon.com!

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FAMILY

Arrows and Boxes by KIRK FREEMAN, Pastor CrossBridge Community Church

The especially painful arrows are the ones There's a deep place in each us. Some call it the heart, others refer to it as the soul, shot by people we love or people in authorbut it's the place where we think and feel ity. Sometimes the arrows aren't words, and resolve. It's in this deep place that we they're actions; painful things done to us. wrestle with who we are--and we all do. Just like a physical wound, if those arrows Every person on the planet questions their aren't removed, they can become infectious, worth and their significance. And just as poisoning our self image and self esteem. universally, every person (I'm betting you're breathing struggles at already thinking about Arrows are hurts and times with feelings of of the arrows that wounds that weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve received some not being good enough, are in your life.) Want to not being valuable, not over the course of our lives. know what's really crazy being appreciated or not about the way we think being worthy. (So if you and feel?... Even if the thought you were the only one, this should arrow was shot into us as a young child, if it be good news.) was never removed, it can negatively impact It's in this deep place that we collect us for the rest of our lives. what I call arrows and boxes. Arrows are That deep place can also get filled hurts and wounds that we've received over with "boxes." Boxes are victories or failures the course of our lives. They may come in that we collected over the years. For examJune 2016 Issue or condemning words the form of careless ple, one of my boxes is the superlative I got that were shot at us when we were younger. waaaay back when I was sixth grade when I

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was voted "Friendliest Boy." On the surface, through comes in acknowledging the arrow that might not seem like a big deal, but in (wound) you received and then forgiving the insecure years of middle school any person who shot it. This isn't often easy, but affirmation from your peers is like solid it's almost always beneficial. Ultimately, the gold. That award became a box I stored in healthiest action you can take is to find my deep place. But just as there are "good" something besides arrows and boxes with boxes, there are also "bad" boxes, like the which to fill your deep place. Starts what if time in the the tenth grade when I was car- you started building your self esteem on something better and more stable than the rying a pizza over my head to a table of my friends. I tripped, tried to recover and had a wounds you've received or your history of spectacular fail with pieces of pizza and my success and failures. You don't have to go to Google to find self esteem going all over the floor. Instantly out how to do this. You have intrinsic value and unintentionally I stored that box in my that comes from our deep place. As adults we This truth is so often collect boxes tied Even if the arrow was shot Creator. obvious that even our to success in our careers, the success of into us as a young child, if it nation's Constitution acknowledges it our children, our finan(Remember that part cial net worth, our phys- was never removed, it can ical beauty or accepnegatively impact us for the about it self-evident that we're endowed by our tance or rejection in our Creator with certain relationships. (You and I rest of our lives. inalienable rights?...) You both know that some of have a Creator, someone our boxes are bigger and above the fray, someone who's opinion more serious than dropped pizza.) never changes or wavers, who has declared While it's natural to celebrate our that you have worth--you matter. As you get victories (good boxes) and be embarrassed to know Him better and better, He'll gently by our failures (bad boxes), it's really danremove your arrows. He'll identify and gerous to store either of them in our deep place. When we do, we are essentially chain- replace your boxes with His unchanging words of affirmation and value. ing our self-worth to what people think of The world is full of opinions about us. Our self-image and worth can become like a flag whipped mercilessly by the winds how to approach our Creator and come to know our truth worth. If you want to know of the opinions and responses of others. more specifically about my point of view- At this introspective point, it's probwhich is rooted in the longstanding tenets ably good to remind you again that we all tend to do this. You're not alone nor are you of the Bible--then investigate the website below or, better yet, come join us any Sunthe only one who has arrows and boxes in their deep place. However, where you enter day at 9:00 or 11:00 a.m. at 25700 Overlook into a distinctly small class of individuals is Pkwy, 78260. We talk about God and issues when you begin to assess your deep place like this every week. www.CrossBridgeComand to deal with the arrows and boxes that munityChurch.com are there. Sometimes a counselor can assist in this or a recovery group. Often the break-

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FAMILY

To Raise a Daughter We Must Be On her place in it. As such, she watches. And she waits. She studies those around her. She “We need to come to know who we truly holds her breath to see how they respond are, that uniquely beautiful person that God when she enters the room. She takes her cues from others. Sweet mamas, she takes has made us. And to have the courage to her cues — from you. live accordingly. Each of us is a unique Mothers as Daughters expression of the divine goodness and Yes, you are her mother, but you are also beauty. If we do not live that and express it in our lives, it will never be expressed in this a daughter. Because, at the end of the day, if world for the glory of God and the up-build- we are in Christ, we are all daughters of the King!It sounds so glamorous, doesn’t it? The ing of the whole Body of Christ.” phrase rolls of the tongue and looks great -- Breaking Bread, Basil Pennington on Instagram, but what the heck does that Your little girl. She’s not perfect, but she’s even mean? It is one thing to say we’re daughters of yours. You remember her frame growing in the King, but it’s another thing entirely to your womb, morphing from coffee bean to live like we are— to model such an identity plum to watermelon. You remember wonso our daughters have an accurate blueprint dering if she would look more like you or to how live into this great-aunt Grace. If It is only when we understand astruth on their own. she would be rational To be a mother like her daddy or spon- what it means to be a daughmeans to provide, to taneous like her ter, that we can truly be the nurture, to teach and mama. Or maybe she To be a daughgrew in the womb of mothers God created us to be. toterraise. means to receive, to another, her first days be taken care of, to learn and be led. For or years weren’t spent in your arms, but no matter, because somehow God directed you me, taking the role of mother seems so much “easier” sometimes because I don’t to her and now she’s woven her way so deeply into the fabric of your heart you can’t have to be vulnerable or ask for help. I don’t have to let my guard down and allow others imagine your life without her. Either way, this girl, though exasperating in. As mother, I often vie for control. As at times, is the most beautiful gift you could daughter, I have to admit someone else might know better and have my best interever imagine. You have so many hopes and est in mind. dreams for her you feel like your heart One could argue that motherhood is might burst right out of your chest and take really about daughterhood. It is only when on a life of its own. we understand what it means to be a When she is little, she throws on prindaughter, that we can truly be the mothers cess dresses and twirls around the room. God created us to be. You tell her she’s the most beautiful, smart, As mothers, we wholeheartedly believe capable person you’ve ever known. She could be president or an astronaut, a doctor our children are fearfully and wonderfully or an inventor. The sky’s the limit! And when made, so why do we have such a hard time believing that for ourselves?? she grows, shying away from unwanted May I suggest, asking the question and attention (which translates to any and all), drooping her shoulders and trying to “fit in,” seeking the answer just might change everything. you tell her to stand up straight and smile For us and, dare I say, for them. because she’s the most wonderful thing that Megan Nilsen is the author of “A Beautiever was. You cringe to think she would ful Exchange - Responding To God’s Invitadoubt her worth for even one second because she is your daughter — wholly and tion For More.” Megan and her husband, Scott, have four children. They adopted dearly loved, beyond anything she could their two youngest from Ethiopia three dare to imagine. years ago. The Nilsens have served on This young girl, growing ever so quickly Young Life staff for almost 20 years and curinto young lady doesn’t want much, she wants it all. At the end of the day, she wants rently live in Colorado Springs, Colorado. all any of us really want — to be loved, to be You can follow Megan’s writings at http:// www.writinginpencil.com/ known and to know we belong. She’s trying to figure out the world and

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Area Churches A F R I C A N M E T H O D I S T E P I S C O PA L

Hodges Chapel A.M.E. 401 Gulf St, San Antonio 78202

(210) 224-0665

ANGLICAN

All Saints Anglican Church 11122 Link Dr., SA 78213 (210) 344-1920 www.allsaintanglican.net A S S E M B LY O F G O D

First Assembly of God 13435 West Ave., SA 78216 (210) 496-9977 Living Springs Assembly Of God 151 Purple Sage Rd, Bandera 78003 (830) 796-7932 Northwest Assembly of God 2714 Hunters Green, SA 78231 (210)492-5531 Victory Assembly Of God 1017 W Byrd Blvd, Universal City 78148 (210) 659-3251 BAPTIST

Calvary Baptist Church 6142 Fm 78, San Antonio 78244 (210) 222-1541 Castle Hills First Baptist Church 2220 NW Military Hwy, SA 78213 (210) 377-8485 Central Baptist Church 1226 S. Presa St., SA 78224 (210) 533-5882 www.freewebs.com/centralbaptistchruch Converse First Baptist Church 9162 FM 78, Converse 78109 (210) 658-2891 Elmendorf First Baptist Church 7795 FM 327, Elmendorf 78112 (210) 665-2113 www.efbconline.org First Baptist Church Universal City 1401 Pat Booker Rd., Universal City 78148 (210) 658-6394 Grace Point Church Medical Center 9650 Huebner Road, SA 78249 (210) 696-6093 www.gracepoint.org Grace Point Church- West Campus 8531 Leslie Rd SA 78254 (210) 363-8932 www.gracepoint.org Helotes Independent Baptist 15335 Orange Tower Dr, Helotes 78023 (210) 695-2321 Hondo First Baptist 2400 Ave P, Hondo 78661 (830) 426-4047 Iglesia Bautista Hispana 1226 E Borgfeld Dr, SA 78260 (830) 438-3081 Lytle First Baptist 16827 N Prairie St, Lytle 78052 (830) 709-2202 Resurrection Baptist Church 1002 E Live Oak Rd, Schertz 78154 (210) 658-0459 www.myrbconline.org/ South San Filadelfia Baptist Church 2483 W. Southcross, SA 78211 (210) 225-7537 www.myssfc.org Southeast Baptist Church 2414 S WW White Rd, SA 78222 (210) 333-6304 Trinity Baptist Church San Antonio 3233 N Saint Marys St, SA 78212 (210) 736-0969 True Life Church 202 W Byrd Blvd, Universal City 78148 (210) 658-5945 www.livetruelife.church C AT H O L I C

St Gabriel Catholic Church 747 SW 39th St, SA 78237

(210) 433-3689

CHURCH OF CHRIST

Dellcrest Church of Christ 1550 S WW White Rd., SA 78220 Liberty View Church Of Christ 1719 Burleson, SA 78202 (210) 251-2325 Northside Church of Christ 19818 US Highway 281 N, SA 78258 (210) 494-1908 www.nscoc.org CHURCH OF THE NAZARENE

Dominion Church of God In Christ 3023 Martin Luther King Dr, San Antonio 78220 (210) 226-2932 CHURCH OF GOD IN CHRIST

Thompson Chapel C.O.G.I.C. 903 S Palmetto, SA 78210

(210) 533-7849

E VA N G E L I C A L F R E E

Northeast Bible Church 19185 FM 2252, Garden Ridge 78266 www.nebible.net FOURSQUARE

Lifehouse Church 20825 Wilderness Oak, San Antonio 78258 (210) 499-5775 www.lifehouseSA.com Living Faith Church 7801 Marbach Rd, SAT 78227 (210) 256-7711 www.livingfaithsa.org I N T E R - D E N O M I N AT I O N A L

Community Bible Church 2477 North Loop 1604 East, San Antonio 78232 (210) 496-5096 www.communitybible.com Community Bible Church Brooks 3005 Sidney Brooks St, SA 78235 (210) 534-1764 www.communitybible.com Community Bible Church Northwest 8118 Tezel Rd, San Antonio 78250 (210) 509-1800 www.communitybible.com Trinity Church 5415 N Loop 1604 E, San Antonio 78247 (210) 653-0003 www.trinitychurch.com LUTHERAN

Christ the King Lutheran 1129 Pat Booker Rd, SA 78148 (210) 658-2254 Good News Lutheran Church 11020 Old Corpus Christi Hwy, SA 78223 (210) 633-0551 LUTHERAN-MISSOURI SYNOD

Concordia Lutheran Church 16801 Huebner Rd, SA78258 (210) 479-1477 www.concordialutheranchurch.com

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Mt Calvary Lutheran 308 Mt Calvary Dr, San Antonio 78209 (210) 824-8748 www.mtcsa.org N O N - D E N O M I N AT I O N A L

Abundant Life Church 5626 Randolph Blvd #1, San Antonio 78233 (210) 650-4816 www.abundantlifechurchsa.org Cornerstone Church 18755 Stone Oak Pkwy, SA 78258 (210) 490-1600 www.sacornerstone.org/ Crossbridge Community Church 25700 Overlook Pkwy, San Antonio 78260 (210) 496-0158 www.crossbridgecommunitychurch.com/ Destiny Church 8635 Callaghan, San Antonio 78230 (210) 349-2295 www.destinychurch.cc Faith Outreach Center International 3806 Sunshine Ranch Rd., San Antonio 78228 www.faith-outreach.org Grace Community Church Universal City 701 Kitty Hawk Rd, Universal City 78148 (210) 659-8200 www.grace-sa.org Harvest Fellowship Community Church 16111 San Pedro, SA 78232 www.harvestfellowship.org House Of Living Bread Church 18940 Redland Rd, SA 78259 (210) 402-6500 Oak Hills Church - Crownridge 19595 West Ih 10, San Antonio 78256 (210) 698-6868 www.oakhillschurch.com/crownridge Oak Hills Church - Journey Fellowship 16847 Interstate 35 N # 3, Selma 78154 (210) 651-1463 www.oakhillschurch.com/journeyfellowship Oak Hills Church - North Central 814 Arion Parkway, Suite 410, SA 78216 (210) 698-4689 www.oakhillschurch.com/northcentral Oak Hills Church - Westside 321 N General Mcmullen Dr, SA 78237 (210) 433-1484 www.oakhillschurch.com/westside Summit Christian Center 2575 Marshall Rd, SA 78259 (210) 402-0565 www.summitsa.com The Living Word of God Christian Church 608 Schertz Parkway, Schertz 78154 (210) 468-3609 Vertical Church 4218 Thousand Oaks, SAT 78217 www.facebook.com/VerticalMinSA Victory Outreach Church 851 Hammond Ave, SA 78210 (210) 533-7060 OTHER

Alamo City Christian Fellowship Church 6500 IH 35 North, SA 78218 www.alamocity.org Alamo Heights Christian Church 6435 N. New Braunfels Ave., SA 78209 (210) 828-5728 Church Alive 18850 Redland Road, San Antonio 78259 (210) 490-1770 www.sachurchalive.com/ Crossroads Community Church 5834 Ray Ellison, San Antonio 78242 (210) 623-4500 www.wherelifechanges.com/ Divine Fellowship 200 So Camp, Seguin 78155 (210) 632-4448 First Christian Church 201 Harriman Place, San Antonio 78204 (210) 226-8545 Friendship Center 217 Pleasanton, San Antonio 78214 (210) 367-6243 Grace Bible Church La Vernia 390 FM 1346 S, La Vernia 78121 (830) 779-5200 Grace Tabernacle Church 3630 SE Military Dr, SA 78223 (210) 534-7080 www.gracepraise.org/ Hope Fellowship Christian Church 4836 Rittiman Rd, SA 78218 (210) 370-3397 https://www.facebook.com/HopeFellowshipSA/ Iglesia Cristiana Oasis de Amor 11333 West Ave, SA 78213 (210) 653-9048 Iglesia de Hogar 1071 W Kirk Place, SA 78214 (210) 433-9993 Iglesia El Jordan 13003 SW Loop 410, SA 78224 (210) 628-4772 Iglesia Vision Y Restauracion 1845 Donaldson Ave, SA 78228 (210) 432-1265 International Bible Church 2369 Benrus Blvd, SA 78228 (210) 434-5541 www.church.ibctx.org/ Jesus’ Church 5726 Mobud St, San Antonio 78238 (210) 682-5224 JMB Outreach Ministries 9558 Cantura Crest, SA 78250 (210) 607-1537 Kingdom Life Christian Ministries Inc. 10635 IH 35 N, Suite 313, San Antonio 78233 (210) 650-5334 www.kingdomlifecm.org/ Kings Mission Fellowship 610 Moursund Blvd, SA 78221 (210) 922-5366 www.kingsmissionsa.com/ Living Water Faith Church 118 Fredericksburg Rd, SA 78201 (210) 733-1980 Living Word Christian Fellowship 4952 Windsor Hl # 103, Windcrest 78239 (210) 650-0712 Love Gospel Church 8102 Crosscreek, San Antonio 78218 (210) 650-3400 Mission of Mercy Ministry 502 E Southcross, SA 78214 (210) 425-3365 New Creations Christian Fellowship 8700 Fourwinds Dr, Windcrest 78239 (210) 646-7997 New Life Christian Center 6610 W US Highway 90, San Antonio 78227 (210) 679-6050 New Life Church 1503 Standish, Floresville 78114 (830) 216-1008 Nuevo Amanecer 502 E Southcross, San Antonio 78226 (830) 281-1162 Primera Iglesia 437 W Johnson, Pleasanton 78064 (830) 570-4999 Real Christ International Church 1136 W Woodlawn, San Antonio 78201 (210) 913-5435 Redeeming Grace AME Zion Chr 1690 Rigsby Ave, SA 78210 (210) 359-6240 Road To Damascus Church 2105 Pinn Rd, SA 78227 (210) 673-4924

Shalom Outreach Ministries 3107 Guadalupe, SA 78207 (210) 438-1257 Shekina Glory Church 614 Chalmers, SA 78214 (210) 577-8212 Souled Out - BFA 3439 Willowwod Blvd, SA 78219 (210) 862-5221 Souls for the Kingdom Ministries 3802 W Salinas, San Antonio 78207 (210) 534-8186 www.souls4.org/Home_Page.html Templo Amor Y Gracia 332 Wilcox Ave, SA 78211 (210) 923-1929 Templo Espiritu de Verdad 96 Ninth St. , Somerset 78069 (210) 639-5328 Thousand Oaks Christian Church 13007 Jones-Maltsberger, SA 78247 (210) 490-7729 Todo Esta Pagado Mission 8305 S Foster, SA 78222 (210) 413-6602 Tower City Church 11220 Perrin Beitel Rd, Suite 110, San Antonio 78217 www.towercitychurch.com/ True Christian Unity Church 10311 Lee Roy Lane, Adkins 78101 (210) 707-1837 Winds of Grace Church 1512 Bandera Rd, San Antonio 78228 (210) 954-2370 www.windsofgrace.org/ P E N T E C O S TA L

Harvest Time Fellowship Ministry 1815 S Ww White Rd, SA 78212 (210) 304-6000 www.htfm.org Iglesia Emanuel Pentecostal 2908 Mission Road, SA 78214 (210) 789-8340 Lively Stone International Christian Church 210 S Grimes St, Ste 103, San Antonio 78203 (210) 226-1234 Mission De La Fe Pentecostes Hwy 35, Derby 78061 (830) 317-6001 PRESBYTERIAN

Faith Presbyterian Church 1307 Blanco Woods, SA 78248 (210) 492-8038 First Presbyterian Church San Antonio 404 North Alamo Street, SA 78205 (210) 226-0215 www.fpcsanantonio.org/ Holy Trinity Presbyterian 16245 Nacogdoches, SA 78247 (210) 654-3411 Stone Oak Presbyterian Church 20024 Crescent Oaks, SA 78258 (210) 497-7974

Northern Hills UMC 3703 N Loop 1604 E, SA 78247 (210) 654-0881 www.nhumc.org/ University United Methodist Church 5084 De Zavala Rd., SA 78249 (210) 696-1033 www.uumcsatx.org Windcrest UMC 8101 Midcrown Dr, SA 78239 (210) 654-0404

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S E V E N T H D AY A D V E N T I S T

Highland Lakes SDA Church 6642 West FM 1431, Granite Shoals 78654

512-755-4379

UNITED METHODIST

Asbury UMC 4601 San Pedro, San Antonio 78212 (210) 735-8115 Bulverde United Methodist Church 28300 Hwy. 281 North, SA 78260 www.bulverdeumc.org Coker UMC 231 E. North Loop Road, San Antonio 78216 (210) 494-3455 Colonial Hills UMC 5247 Vance Jackson, SA 78230 (210) 349-9583

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O C TO B E R 2 0 1 6 — B E A CO N

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PETS

Cancer Awareness Month benign fatty tumors and aggressive malignant cancers, look and feel the same. ALL masses are presumed to The most important point I can stress as we devote be cancerous (even though most are proven not to be cancerous) until proven otherthis month to cancer awarewise. ALL masses big enough to ness is the extreme imporFollowing these rules saves lives be aspirated with a small needle tance of early diagnosis. Every be aspirated to determine week (sometimes every day!) I and decreases the costs to the should if they are benign or cancerous. see pets with cancer who were ALL suspicious lumps should be never properly diagnosed by owner, and in many cases removed and biopsied. Following their prior doctors. These are these rules saves lives and pets with lumps and bumps on removing small cancerous decreases the costs to the owner, their bodies, whose owners masses actually cures the cancer. and in many cases removing took them to their prior docsmall cancerous masses actually tors to have the lumps and cures the cancer. bumps checked. Typically the prior doctor looks at the mass, Dr. Messonnier, a 1987 graduate of Texas A&M College feels it, and “diagnoses” a “fatty tumor” simply by the of Veterinary Medicine, opened Paws & Claws Animal look and feel of the mass. Hospital (Plano, TX) in 1991. His special interests NO!!!! This is malpractice. While many of these lumps are simply fatty tumors, include exotic pets, dermatology, cancer, and internal medicine. Dr. Messonnier is a well-known speaker and many are malignant cancers (sarcomas and mast cell author. tumors.) Here are the rules to follow-ALL masses, both Dr. Sean Messonnier

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I R

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O C TO B E R 2 016 — B E A CO N

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FAITH

PRAYING IN COLOR wanted to say, it might be ugly, it might be angry, and it might require black, maroon, and forest green. After all, there are strugSometimes when I’m praying it’s helpful gles in my life and in my newsfeed that to grab a handful of colored pens or sharpseem so unjust, so harmful, so evil… there’s ies and kind of doodle and jot down words. It helps me to stay focused, to listen, and to really no way to pretty them up. What follows being honest with God in really dwell in my thoughts and feelings. My journals are full of lime green arrows, indigo our struggle, is waiting on his help. This part may be harder than the first. How do verses and phrases, and purple outlines, we wait for help when we’re already worn exclamation points, and stars. out, disillusioned, and our hearts are turnA week ago at church we talked about lament. This isn’t a popular topic on Sunday ing cold? We need to return to the one thing we mornings – being angry, and especially know to be true. We need being angry with God, isn’t something We need to return to the one to trust in his love. we’re comfortable thing we know to be true. We When we’re in the depths, and everything admitting. But wow, feels uncertain, this is the there is something so need to trust in his love. one thing we can return freeing about being to. When our hearts are breaking, and our real with God, not having to ‘put on a good minds are full of questions, doubts, and face.’ We were encouraged to pray out our hazard – our anger, our fear, our disappoint- fears, sometimes this is the only solid thing we can stand on, the only thing we can ment – to our God. really trust… that God is LOVE. My immediate thought? “I’m going to In The Inner Voice of Love, priest and need some new markers.” author Henri Nouwen writes this, “You have 1/4Something’ page ads telling me that if I really to trust the place that is solid, the place released it all to God, really said what I BY JEN WISE

where you can say yes to God’s love even when you do not feel it. Right now you feel nothing except emptiness and the lack of strength to choose. But keep saying, ‘God loves me, God’s love is enough.’” On Sundays at church, when I look around the room, I know the stories and heartaches behind many of the faces. And many of them know mine. And every week as we all shuffle through the communion line I watch each of these stories come forward and receive the gift of God’s love. And it’s beautiful. And it’s what sustains us.

So let's get crazy and use all the markers in the pack. Let’s be real about not just our hopes and desires, but also our heartaches and disappointments. Let’s offer them to God as the most honest prayer, and trust in his love. Jen Wise, the managing editor of Restoration Living, is a compassionate theologian, obsessive foodie, constant hostess and voracious reader. She is a graduate of Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary (MA Theology). Catch up with her on twitter @ jenlwise.

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SENIOR

5 Things You Should Expect Heading Into Retirement intentional way. However, don’t expect to be bored. 4. You will downsize. According to the 2014 Employee Benefit Downsizing will guide you down memResearch Institute’s (EBRI) Retirement Confidence Survey (RCS), three out of five retir- ory lane. After the initial shock, the benefits will be apparent. The financial impacts are ees say their experiences in retirement did numerous; less property taxes, lower energy not match their expectations. In other costs, selling of unused items, and potential words, if you are over 50 and plan to retire, shorter commuting. All of the above are it is highly likely that you won’t get what important components of simplifying and you think you are going to get. The gap in enjoying the essentials in retirement. missed expectations could be cash flow, 5. You will finally have to get on the unrealistic daily agendas, health care, or a personal identity crisis. Regardless, we need same page as your spouse about spending. You should do a budget, but if you don’t, to reset expectations. Below are five things then at least discuss the spending plan. you should expect going into retirement. There is little room for error here. I have 1. Retirement will have three phases. experienced disconnects between spouses Phase 1: The Go-Go Years, Phase 2: The where hidden AMEX charges resulted in So-So Years, and Phase 3: The No-Go Years (Advanced Age). Let’s not deny that father- both financial and marital costs. It may not be a perfect cash flow plan, but the little time is undefeated, and aging is a natural cash flow conversations process in all must be established at phases. Recognize if you are over 50 and plan to the beginning and mainand respect the aging process, but retire, it is highly likely that you tained. The word retire can stay focused on won’t get what you think you are be found in the Bible. In the reason for this season in your life. going to get. The gap in missed Numbers 8:25, God tells Moses that the Levites Each phase requires you to be expectations could be cash flow, “…shall retire from sera participant in unrealistic daily agendas, health vice in work and not work anymore.” But this God’s plan. Reflect on what Paul said care, or a personal identity crisis isn’t the whole story. In the next verse, God to the Galatians, wanted them to “assist their brothers in the “Let’s not get tired of doing what is tent of meeting…” after they retired. God good….” Galatians 6:9 wants you to assist others in retirement as 2. Your identity will be tested. well. Just know that your ability to assist You can say your identity is in Christ, others rests on the right frame of mind, wise but when at a party, how many times do you tell a new friend your occupation rather financial decisions, and dependence upon God. than your salvation? When you are honest you will admit to the work addiction, quoDarryl W Lyons is the co-founder and tas, risk taking, and decision authority. CEO of PAX Financial Group, LLC. He is also When all of it has discontinued, you will the author of Small Business Big Pressure: A experience withdrawal. Just be prepared. Faith-based Approach to Guide the AmbiThere are many resources to walk you tious Entrepreneur. You can contact him at through this season of life, including Bob darryl@paxfg.com Buford’s Half Time Institute. Securities offered through LPL Financial, 3. You will crave boredom. Many of my retired clients claim to have Member FINRA/SIPC. Investment Advice offered through PAX Financial Group, LLC, a never been busier. Some square dance, registered investment advisor and separate some build wooden crafts to sell at the flea entity from LPL Financial. markets, others have started businesses, The opinions voiced in this material are and some spoil grandchildren. In retirefor general information only and are not ment, you can expect the pace to be differintended to provide specific advice or recent, yet still swift. Be sure to not absorb all ommendations for any individual. the time with “busyness.” Continue to leave margin in life for serving others in a very BY DARRYL LYONS

Tune in Saturdays at Noon KSLR AM630 Steve Teel hosts local and national difference makers who share their stories and insights to give you hope, inspiration, and change.

May 2016 issue - PROOF 2

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O C TO B E R 2 016 — B E A CO N

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FINANCE

9 Ways to Max Out Your FSA 6. Refill your first-aid kit. Although a lot of over-the-counter drug store items now Do you have a health care flexible spend- require a prescription to qualify, Band-Aids and elastic bandages do not. ing account (FSA)? Have you incurred 7. Join a smoking cessation program. enough expenses to get back all the money Fees associated with a program are qualifyyou put into the plan? If not, here are a few ing expenses, but over-the-counter medicaideas you can use so you don’t leave any tions (such as nicotine gum) require a premoney in the plan. scription to be eligible. 1. Get all medication prescriptions 8. Get check-ups. If your dentist and refilled. A lot of prescriptions and medical optometrist are anything like mine, it may plans only allow one refill in a 30-day period, but if you don’t have that restriction, be too late to get an appointment…but if you’re overdue for a dental and/or vision or you’re behind in your refills, now’s the exam, see if you can get them scheduled time to take action. before the end of the year. 2. Get new glasses or preyour eligible 9. Get a prescription for scription sunglasses. If you OTC meds. If you still can’t use didn’t get a new pair of glasses dependents are up your FSA with the above this year, maybe you should get them now—or a back-up pair. If also reimbursable, suggestions, contact your doctor about writing you a preyou did get new glasses this so make sure scription for over-the-counter year, think about a pair of preyou’ve taken their pain medication, cough syrup, scription sunglasses. or the like. 3. Refill your contact expenses into You should also check with lenses prescription and/or your employer to see if your stock up on lens solution. If you account as well plan has a grace period that go through contact lenses like I allows you to continue to incur expenses in do, it never hurts to have extra boxes ready 2017. But if you leave a few dollars in the to go. And did you know lens solution is an plan, all is not lost. Remember, you did get a eligible expense too? Stock up! tax break throughout the year by having 4. Buy medical equipment. An electronic thermometer is always handy to have this pre-tax deduction. Still, definitely best to recoup your expenses. And any expenses around. And if you’re “of an age” perhaps incurred by your eligible dependents are having your own blood pressure cuff. (You also reimbursable, so make sure you’ve can find them for as little as $35—although I don’t know if they’re any good at that price taken their expenses into account as well. Kelly Milne is from San Diego, California point.) 5. Stock up on condoms. They’re a qual- and writes about frugal living, healthy eatifying expense. That’s all I have to say about ing/cooking, personal finance, eco-friendly living, and being of service. that. BY KELLY MILNE

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FINANCE

Will High Stress Kill You, Save Your Life, or Neither? BY ROMAN DUDA

Many people assume stress is obviously bad, and lots of people tell us they want to find a “low stress job”. But a new book (and TED talk with over 10 million views) by psychologist Kelly McGonigal claims that stress is only bad if you think it is, and that stress can make us stronger, smarter and happier. So are most people wrong, or is stress only bad if you have the wrong attitude towards it? We did a survey of the literature, and found that as is often the case, the truth lies in between. Stress can be good in some circumstances, but some of McGonigal’s claims also seem overblown. Our main conclusions are: ● The consensus among researchers seems to be that stress is good when it’s moderate in intensity (not too low or too high) and when it’s short-term, rather than on-going. ● Intense and on-going stress is strongly linked to poor health, including a weakened immune system, heart disease, depression and anxiety disorders, and higher chance of death. ● Some studies have found a correlation between negative health outcomes and believing that stress is bad for your health, but it is hard to draw causal conclusions from these findings. However, there is experimental evidence that reframing stress as an opportunity rather than as a threat leads to better performance and better cardiovascular health at least in the short term. ● Some studies suggest that people in

higher responsibility positions, with greater job demands, have better health outcomes and are less stressed than people in lower responsibility positions. This may be because those in higher responsibility positions also tend to have greater autonomy, control and power. Also, the authors argue that leadership positions are actually associated with lower levels of stress: “… we found clear evidence that leadership is associated with lower levels of stress”. Therefore this study isn’t a finding that stress is linked to positive health outcomes, instead it’s pointing out that leadership positions are associated with lower stress than other positions. The authors’ favored explanation for this finding is that the higher demands of leaders are offset by higher levels of control – having a large number of subordinates that you have authority over – making it the case that leaders experience less stress than non-leaders: ”Leaders possess a particular psychological resource—a sense of control—that may buffer against stress.” In sum, these studies suggest that the increased control and power that comes with higher responsibility positions offsets the negative effects of higher job demands. Roman Duda is the Director of Content for 8,000 Hours. He did a fully-funded Masters in Philosophy at Oxford, during which he also consulted for a major energy company on their business strategy, whilst also studying Mandarin Chinese. With a strong interest in Quantified Self, he has worked at the start-ups Memrise and Self Spark.

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MEN

MARRIAGE DESTROYER en·ti·tle·ment 3 : belief that one is deserving of or entitled to certain privileges [Merriam-Webster Dictionary] Entitlement can be a huge marriage problem. When we think we deserve something we’re not getting we can be downright nasty about it. Be it anger or the passiveaggressive approach, it’s not good. We might get stubborn and refuse a reasonable compromise. “Give me exactly what I think I deserve or else!” If the one who’s not getting what they want retaliates by withholding from their spouse it can get downright ugly. Each

refuses to give what their spouse wants until they get what they want. Pride takes hold and the stalemate is set in stone. I could tell you Christians shouldn’t act this way and you should just give in – but that’s not the solution. Some things do matter, and we all have a limit to how selfless we can be. A better solution is to work through the things to which you each feel entitled. How valid is the need? Is it reasonable or even possible for your spouse to meet the need? Is it even your spouse’s job to meet the need? What does God say about it?

Work out what spouses should reasonably expect from each other. Then look at your lives as they are now and decide if it’s currently possible for those needs to be met. If it’s not possible, why not? What has to change to make it possible? Doing this you get three lists: 1. Things you should get from your spouse. 2. Things you should get from your spouse after some changes are made. 3. Things you would like from your

spouse but can’t fairly expect or demand. Your bride will have a similar list. Start by working to provide the things in the first category. Then work on the changes necessary to move things in the second category to the first. Finally, look for other ways to meet the needs in the third category. Of course, you should sacrifice to give her some of her third category things, just because you love her. By Paul Byerly from The Generous Husband

Is Your Marriage Drowning? Does talking about it just make things worse?

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HEALTH & WELLNESS

ALL ABOUT EYES by MONICA ALLISON, OD

Fall Brings Change and a NEW location

Our satellite office in Bulverde is open and going full speed and we are now ready to make the move of our Stone Oak office to our new building. We broke ground in Feb 2016 and it has been a long time in getting the plans from paper to an actual building. There are improvements to patient flow and overall efficiency for our patients to experience in the new space. We will be moving our entire Stone Oak office up the street one light to 810 Knights Cross. By the time this has gone to print, our new signage may be on our new building announcing where we will be. We have added a new doctor to our team and we will have room for 3 doctors at once in our new facility. We have more space and more choices for frames and sunglasses in our new location. We will have a refreshment center for our patients and a larger children’s area to keep them entertained. We are going from 3300 square feet to 5100 so we won’t feel as cramped in our new space. The official move will happen the weekend of Oct 21-23. We will have a doctor at the Bulverde location to cover and see patients We will be moving emergencies the days we are moving. We will be having our ribbon cutting November 4 and then our entire Stone a special grand opening showcase on December 2 to highlight our new vendors Oak office to 810 things to look forward to in and the new office. So many the coming months! We are appreciative to the support Knights Cross. of all of our patients we have seen for the last 14 years in our current space and we can’t wait to see everyone in the new place. Stone Oak Vision Source is a member of Vision Source. Vision Source is the largest network of independent optometrists in the US. There are over 2500 locations with over 4000 doctors throughout the United States. Vision Source doctors have a vast network of accessibility to technology and purchasing power. We share this with our patients by having state of the art equipment, many choices in frame lines, and the highest quality lenses on the market. We pride ourselves in having highly trained staff as well to meet all of your eye care needs. We recently had 3 staff members pass their board exams and we will add their certificates to our wall of pride in our new office- Congrats to Rachel and Shantel passing their CPOA exams and to Sam for passing the ABO! If you’d like to make an appointment, please call us at 210495-9020 or visit us at www.visionsource-stoneoak.com. We will be located at 810 Knights Cross as of Oct 24. Prior to that, we are at 19202 Stone Oak Parkway, ste 106.

Do you feel lost, alone, or bored in your marriage?

Has infidelity or addiction made your marriage an emotional wasteland? Are you frustrated, hurt, or angry with your spouse?

Before you go under…

Reach for a Lifeline!

The next course

in San Antonio begins on October 21, 2016. For more information, or to register, go to: http://www.retrouvaille.org. For questions about the specifics of the program here in San Antonio, call (210) 848-3278 Retrouvaille (pronounced Re-tru-vi, with a long i) is a French word that means “Rediscovery,” and that’s what it does; helps husbands and wives rediscover each other and why they fell in love. The program offers the tools needed to recover a loving marriage relationship. Since 1977, thousands of couples in hopelessly cold, unloving relationships or on the verge of divorce have successfully overcome their marital problems by attending the program.

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ENTERTAINMENT

Our Guest Lineup

Tune in Saturdays for Beacon Radio Tune in to our new Beacon Radio show Saturdays at noon on KSLR AM630. Host Steve Teel Steve@saBeacon.com Steve Teel hosts local and national difference makers who will share their stories and insights to give you hope, inspiration, and change. Steve is the pastor of Momentum Bible Church, author, and founder of Very Bold Ministries.

October 2

Randy Ginnan

A Beacon in the Darkness BY ANDY STANLEY

Joe Reinagel & Bill Taylor

October 8

Urban Rescue & Grant Leslie

October 15

MayorLynn Ivy Taylor Hickey & AronTaylor

October 22

October 29

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Justin Graves Ministries: Justin, Michelle, Gabi Graves

God’s ultimate plan for your life reaches are merely potential opportunities for the beyond the visions he’s given you for your Father to draw attention and people to himfamily, business, ministry, and finances. He self. has positioned you in your culture as a sinWhen you pray for your family, don’t gular point of light. A beacon in a world that limit your request to “protection” and “blessing.” Pray that God would establish desperately needs to see something divine, your family as a light in your community. something that is clearly not of this world. Above and beyond the achievements associ- Ask him to use your family relationships to attract others’ attention to him. Ask him to ated with your vision, he wants to draw allow others to detect a divine element in people to himself. Our visions are means to your family’s life and lifestyle. a greater end, namely the glory of God and When you pray for financial the salvation of men and women. This is his ultimate objective, his You are here to and business success, ask God to it in such a way that those ultimate desire. be a light to grant outside the faith sit up and take Have you ever prayed anything notice. Pray that the people along these lines: “Father, let my your world. around you would realize that light shine before people in such a way that they may see my good works and your success was accomplished with the help of your God. glorify you”? You are here to be a light to your world. I don’t hear prayers like that very often. You are a beacon in this dark night. Our prayers hover close to our personal The success God grants you is not for visions and dreams. All too often we focus your sake alone. It is a means to a much our prayer energies on trying to get God to bless something, change somebody, or grant greater end. An eternal end. There is a divine potential in all that you do. us success with a project. Yet he is far more Put yourself in the shoes of the nonbeinterested in the consistency of our light in environments where light is not apprecilievers in your life. What do they see when they observe how you live your life? ated. All our projects, dreams, and visions

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Dr. Jonathan Goff offered great insight on all pillars of health in a free seminar during September, which included a delicious meal. Dr. Goff first presented eye-opening facts of American health. He shared with us that since 1980, diabetes has tripled in our country, and obesity has doubled. In the World Health Rankings, we rank 39th. That is comparable to Kuwait, which ranks number 45. “Our health is the something that we have forever.” Health insurance becomes helpful only when there is a lack of health. Our health is up to us, to feel and live better. The key is to be proactive in our daily lives. An overarching enemy we all face is the element of stress. Stress breaks down into three elements: physical, chemical, and emotional. Each branch of stress can be overcome with a proactive mindset! Stress is our natural reaction when we feel a need to survive in our environment. When our body looks to use stress to survive, it ceases to work on digesting food or creating positive hormones. Stress has a direct correlation with weight gain for that reason. Physical stress includes that feeling in your shoulders and back. Chemical stress

includes negative food, smoking, and other elements we put into our body. Emotional stress comes from things like work and taxes. But Dr. Goff hits hard not to look at the symptoms, but the cause of these issues. Treat root causes to gain health and overall wellness. His clinic treats the whole person, by putting together the pieces of their life and body all together. A few tips he shared with us: look into how much milk you should drink, obviously keep away from artificial sweeteners, and the late night food is what often makes us wake up in the middle of the night and keeps us up. Steer clear from fat free boxes of food. Fat is not necessarily what leads to weight gain. Sugar is the enemy, and fat free food increases the sugar to keep up the taste. How would your life be if your health was perfect? How has health affected your life? Are you motivated? Dr. Goff of “Back and Body Chiropractic” holds many free seminars like these to help improve health. Give them a call at 210.487.1204 to see when the next dinner is. The best time for great health is now.

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MEN

Two Heartfelt Needs by STEPHEN L. CERVANTES

From school peers: Adults in my counseling sessions consis“You’re stupid. No one likes you. No one tently voice two needs: the longing for wants to be your friend. Loser!” peace and the longing for a love story. From a spouse or a significant relationThese needs transcend age, and although expressed in different ways, display that my ship: clients deeply desire help finding internal :”You are messed up. You have no selfrest as well as romance in their marriage. control. Who would want you? When are These themes cause you going to grow up! I I have found the number don’t want to be with me to wonder, “What happened in their lives to one reason for a stunted you!They internalize these rob them of peace and joy?” Although many messages and begin to marriage is that one answers exist, one area believe: spouse stops growing. to address is managing “I am not good one’s thoughts. Do those enough. I am not like who struggle ruminate upon unhealthy others. No one wants to be my friend. No messages? one wants me. I am defective. Strugglers may replay damaging mesIf you recognize this pattern, purpose to move from destructive beliefs to spiritual sages from their past until they almost truths. Ask Jesus to show you His truth, allow them to become self-filling prophethen intentionally replace unhealthy cies. thoughts with redemptive ones. Messages from parents may have As for the love story…. included: I have found the number one reason for “You will never amount to much! You a stunted marriage is that one spouse stops are lazy! Stop talking! No one wants to lisgrowing. Instead, commit to a life-long misten to you. You are such a mess. I don’t know how you are going to make it in life!” sion to aggressively learn and practice rela-

tionship building. . a. Read a book on communication skills. b. Get training on emotional self-management. c. Attend a seminar on healthy spiritual and emotional growth. Along with emotional skills development, grow spiritually. a. Ask God what He wants to teach you in every difficult situation. b. Use every conflict as a training exercise for growth. Ask God for wisdom. c. Pray, “God, grow me and show me.” Don’t wait for someone else to change. In summary, to increase peace and step toward oneness in marital love, stop repeat-

ing negative, destructive beliefs. Cry out for wisdom. Never stop working to grow emotionally, spiritually and relationally. May you receive the peace that surpasses all understanding. And may you live a great love story out of the fullness of God’s love for you. StephenCervantes.com. Stephen is a Licensed Marriage Therapist and expert in relationship love. He has 28 years of experience. He helps individuals find greater inner peace and also helps them become more successful in relationships. 210-4909062 (Stone Oak area)

MISSION

Good Steward: Matching Money to Mission BY GLEN GUYTON

The church has been a poor steward of the resources we have been given. The bulk of our time is devoted to worship services and insider “fellowship” events that only seek to indoctrinate the individual to our particular congregational culture. We create holy huddles rather than facilitating mission and creating capacity that gives hope to the world. The church experience has been relegated to the Saturday or Sunday production. Many churches claim to be seeker friendly, but there are both overt and covert rules for how one is to properly carry themselves. Typical worship services are inherently not for outsiders; they are more akin to insider parties. Services are a display of the gifts of those on stage, but not an engagement of the spectators. Is this the best use of the financial and staff resources? What is the mission of the church? Is it to entertain members or to engage the world? Each congregation has to ask itself,

what is our mission? Let’s go out on limb to their context. Jesus spoke to the situaand imagine Matthew 28:19-28 is a “Great tions people were in, whether they were a Commission” for all churches. Imagine fisherman, a soldiers or farmers. churches have adopted this as their primary I love a good worship service. I expect it mission. Where then should our time and to have great music, preaching and visuals. energy be devoted? Matthew 28 refers to As I mature, I realize this Christian walk has discipleship, to be more than which should I Typical worship services are inherently entertainment. not be confused have been in not for outsiders; they are more akin to church for most with congregamy 46 years. I tional memberinsider parties. Services are a display of ofprobably have ship. Matthew 28 calls the disthe gifts of those on stage, but not an preached, read or heard most of ciples to observe the Bible 10 and practice the engagement of the spectators. times over. So I stuff that Jesus did. I wonder how much time Jesus spent in ask, “How can I be a good steward of all the knowledge and wisdom that has been committee meetings. Did Jesus and his disciples spend the bulk of his time coming up poured into my life?” I urge you, pastors and leaders, to exam with a great Sunday service or more time where your resources are going. Are we just defending the persecuted? Jesus was maintaining a Sunday fellowship for the engaged in the community. He was on the streets; he walked amongst the people shar- elite or are we equipping people to impact ing with them messages that related directly the world? Is it all for a Sunday morning

show? I don’t know what your priorities are, but here are some categories that you might consider and see where they are reflected in the work of your ministry. • • • • • •

Worship for members Fellowship and member social event Combating issues of poverty Social justice and education) Discipleship Community service (childcare & elderly care) • Prayer and Support Maybe your congregation has other priorities, but I would urge you, as stewards of God’s people and money, to examine wisely the management of these precious gifts. Glen Alexander Guyton 574-524-5282 GlenG@GlenGuyton.com (This is a personalized google/gmail account)

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SPORTS

2016 Rio Olympics: Don’t Do Stupid! by JIM FAULK, Area Director-FCA

By the time this column finds its way into your hands (or onto your screens), the normal rhythms of the school year will have returned in full swing. You’re likely enjoying all we hold near and dear to our hearts: Friday night football, volleyball, marching bands, and of course cheerleaders and dance teams. It’s hard to believe, with the changing of seasons, that it was just weeks ago that many of us were glued to our big screen televisions and mobile devices, watching the U.S. Olympic team dominate the Rio 2016 Summer Games. Team USA picked up 121 medals, 46 of them gold! I’m not sure I have been so excited about the Olympic Games since the 1980s, when the U.S. hockey team beat the Russians in what has been long titled the “Miracle on Ice”. Unfortunately, with all the great athletes, great athletic performances, and accompanying human interest stories, the final days

of the Olympics, at least for we Americans, It’s been estimated that the most influwere tarnished. Four members of the USA’s ential athlete involved lost literal millions of swim team had a very bad night on the sponsorship dollars. Perhaps it’s a good time town, then fabricated a story to cover up for all of us to recall the admonition of the their misdeeds. Apostle Paul in Galatians, “Whatsoever a I must admit, man sows, this he as a very mediowill also reap”. If Four members of the USA’s swim it hadn’t been cre (just okay), team had a very bad night on the heard from the washed-up athscriptures, athlete and coach, I town, then fabricated a story to am truly dumbletes would cercover up their misdeeds. founded by how tainly have heard those who have it from a coach so much – talents, abilities, gifts, honors) – attempting to keep incredibly gifted athletes can so easily, in an instant, really, flush their eligible for competition, telling them, “Don’t reputations down the toilet by doing what BE stupid, don’t DO stupid”. we all know not to do. In this most recent in But personally, the word I’ve placed in a long line of athletes taking missteps, not the forefront of my memory for just those only was the reputation of a team and the occasions when I’m tempted to be and/or nation represented tarnished, but several do stupid is II John 1:8, “Watch yourself, athletes’ lost significant value of sponsorthat you do not lose what you’ve accomship endorsements. plished; but that you receive your full

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reward”. One of my life’s most frightening thoughts is that of being publicly disqualified. As I read and study the Word of God from front to back, I am reminded time and again to be on guard, be vigilant, to be watchful. Life is not to be lived without both consequence and reward, as it pertains to my lifestyle choices. My hope and prayer for our young, impressionable athletes is to grasp that choices can bring both joy and reward, but can as easily usher in destruction and disqualification. Will you join me in praying for our young athletes, that they grasp the goodness of the Lord, that His plans for them are good and full of life, and that they will seek and serve Him with all their hearts, souls, minds, and bodies? Check out our Facebook, Twitter, Alamo FCA’s Website, and Instagram accounts!

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