Peace

By Elisha Bradburn

This spring I got the privilege of some time with my mentor Miles Kingdon. Miles has a few horses in training, some client horses, and a new horse of his own. Watching the change in the horses was nothing short of amazing. As I watched over the days there were several horses with very different personalities and pasts. The one thing that was consistent was Miles’ attitude of unconditional love and appreciation for each horse. The results had the hallmark smoothness that can only be present in the absence of tension in body and mind. It looks like peace.

Ihave been reflecting on how I might put what I observed to good use, bring horses this peace. What was it that allowed such a marked change in each one of those horses? And I do mean marked change. Heads low, eyes soft, attention without fear, team work. While I can’t give you a set of steps to follow, or a certain technique to apply to every horse, even though I did observe timehoned skills at work, and particular ways of going about things for safety and clarity... I can tell you it was something bigger than all of that. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t magic, or “horse whispering,” but is akin to it in that what it starts with is intangible, it must come from your heart and reach your horse’s heart, and it requires you to be unselfish, humble, self aware and observative.

The fundamental ingredient in Miles’ way of bringing peace to these horses is well described by Sarah Schlote, Trauma and Attachment Psychotherapist:

“Attachment theory focuses on the importance of providing safe haven conditions in relationship, which are foundational to the development of trust. The primary way caregivers do this is through the accuracy and responsiveness of their attunement, in combination with their ability to provide co-regulation.

When we “are seen and heard, feel felt, and get gotten” by another individual (my paraphrase of Dr. Daniel Siegel, founder of interpersonal neurobiology – a field which has been adapted into interspecies neurobiology for those of us looking at the human-animal bond), our nervous system begins to settle and we begin to feel safe in relationship. When we feel safe, as the polyvagal theory suggests, many more things are possible: a deeper sense of intimacy and connection, the capacity Miles Kingdon teaching me at a Stockmanship Workshop. Photo credit: Christa Miremadi.

Miles and me with my colt “Hefner” getting him started - notice his peaceful stance. Photo credit: Heidi Shuster. Miles and me with his client’s filly “Wesson” on one of her first rides - she was at peace with it. Photo credit: Larry Field.

for play and creativity, the attention and focus necessary for learning and other higher order brain functions, and the ability to rest and digest effectively. Our nervous system can do all these things because it is in a state of sustainable physiology that is conducive to experiencing those said things.”

Now, attunement is a label for what I observed a great horseman intuitively doing, not because he read this article or studied psychology, in fact he has never read this article. It came from years of trial and error with thousands of horses over a lifetime. It is the patina left on a person by a life well-lived, and a heart that stayed soft despite, or maybe because of, seemingly insurmountable circumstances. It takes somebody strong enough to be gentle, and to do nothing when that is what the horse needs. It takes an innate understanding of the prey/ predator relationship, and how we must earn trust in order to build something truly grand. It is possible to get things done, and still have our horses like us at the end. We just have to ensure that we keep the relationship and peace as our ultimate goal, not the things we are trying to accomplish. These are the qualities of a true horseman. These are the qualities that will bring about peace in our horse, and human relationships.

Elisha Bradburn and her husband Clay own Faithful Farm, an equestrian centre in the Fraser Valley. Elisha’s passion with horses lies in psychologybased horsemanship, with a strong consideration for the horse’s point of view. Elisha is available for speaking engagements and can be followed on her Legacy Horsemanship pages on both Facebook and Instagram or e-mailed at legacyhorsemanship@shaw.ca.

Reference: https://equusoma.com/connection-before-concepts/ Article by Sarah Schlote