You help us be there round the clock
Your Spring 2018 newsletter P3
Small Talk Saves Lives
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Thanks a Millican!
Contents Small Talk Saves Lives It’s a warm evening…
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Thanks a Millican!
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The art of listening
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“It’s a warm evening, isn’t it?”
2018 Spring
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id you know that a little small talk can be all it takes to save someone’s life?
Healing through listening 8
Having trained more than 10,000 rail staff to spot and help vulnerable travellers who may be at risk of suicide, Samaritans in partnership with Network Rail, British Transport Police and the wider rail industry launched Small Talk Saves Lives back in November 2017 - a nationwide campaign that encourages the travelling public to look after one another. The centrepiece of the campaign was a video telling Sarah's story (see next page).
Brew Monday’s cuppa 9 Turn talking into action
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Singing away the blues 12 Jamie’s song and dance
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Tara’s pedal power 14 Dave’s marathon effort!
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Healing experience p8
The campaign is built on a simple ask: if you think somebody might need help, trust your instincts and strike up a conversation. A little small talk can be all it takes to interrupt someone’s suicidal thoughts and help them begin their journey to recovery. We can all do it. If you spot someone looking distant, withdrawn or upset or just get the feeling that something isn’t right, strike up a conversation with a comment like "It's a warm evening, isn't it?" Or, if you don’t feel safe or comfortable to do so, tell a member of staff or call 999. Your involvement could help save someone’s life.
If you'd like to share your story to help encourage others to talk and increase awareness of Samaritans' work, please get in touch with us on: 03709 00 00 32
supportercare@samaritans.org
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Marathon effort! p15
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Background Illustration © shutterstock.com
5.7 mil ion+ views of the campaign film 406% more traffic to our website
Spring 2018
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Small talk saved Sarah’s life Did you see the video? Told through an actress, Sarah’s story brought the campaign to life. At just 28 years of age, with so much to look forward to, Sarah Wilson* left her house one day intending to end her life. She’d left a suicide note at home before heading towards a railway station. Thanks to someone who noticed something wasn’t right, Sarah did go home that day. And one day, she hopes to realise her aspirations to be a writer, and possibly pursue a career in law. It took just one person, who chose to stop for a moment to ask whether Sarah was OK and listen to her story. And listen just long enough to change the course of Sarah’s life.
With her personal experience of the difference a caring, timely conversation can have on a negative state of mind, Sarah was closely involved in the Small Talk Saves Lives campaign. Sarah shared her story in the hope that anyone hearing about Small Talk Saves Lives would – like the person that stepped into her life – help others by breaking the silence with a simple question, such as “What train are you catching today?” If you missed the video inspired by that day in Sarah’s life, you can watch it online at: samaritans.org/springnews *Sarah’s name has been changed Sarah and the actor who play ed her
Thanks a Millican, Sarah! C
omedian and writer Sarah Millican is touring the UK all year with her show Control Enthusiast.
Sarah hit rock bottom whilst struggling to cope with the break-up of her first marriage. Feeling at an all-time low, she rang Samaritans – something she describes in her book, How To Be Champion. “I expected it to be like when you ring the bank with a bit of music and some options. Nope, they answer super-quietly and they just let you talk.” Sarah not only bounced back but turned the experience of her divorce into standup, won best newcomer for her debut Edinburgh Festival show in 2008 and became a regular on TV and radio. Aside from her comedy career, she has also created the #joinin campaign on Twitter that helps battle loneliness at Christmas,
which we were pleased to help promote last year. We’re delighted that Sarah has chosen to support Samaritans on her tour with a bucket collection at every venue. So far, the response has been overwhelming with more than £10,000 donated in the first month alone. Many of Sarah’s tour dates have sold out, but there are still tickets available for some shows, and lucky fans may be able to pick up returns at the box office too. If you’re going to one of Sarah’s gigs, be sure to look out for our volunteers and our big green Samaritans buckets at the end of the show. For more details visit samaritans.org/springnews
Text TOUR18 to 70123 to donate £3*
* By texting TOUR18 to 70123, you will be charged £3 plus one standard network rate message. Samaritans will receive 100%.
Spring 2018
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24/7 We're here round the clock
How do you feel people will respond to your photos?
First duty – documenting the art of listening
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Photographer Phillip Job
Phillip, a Samaritans volunteer and MA student, recently took a series of portraits of fellow volunteers at his branch. These have been collated into ‘First Duty', a photographic documentary of the power of listening. Below Phillip talks about what inspired the project and what his hopes for it are. What was the inspiration behind First Duty? Q
What were the most challenging aspects of the project? Q
I care very much about mental health issues, but what I feel is so often overlooked is that not only does someone need to be willing to talk about their problems, but they also need someone to listen to them.
It was a difficult challenge from the start: to take a conceptual idea and try and turn it into a primarily photographic project. It came down to finding the pictures that were most expressive and putting them together into a coherent whole.
What were you aiming to capture on camera?
What have you learned from the experience?
Q
I wanted to try and capture the range of emotions that our listening volunteers go through when answering calls, and the variety of people that volunteer for Samaritans. One of the things that struck me most when joining was how very different everyone I met was.
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I’d like anyone thinking about calling Samaritans to see the genuine care and human emotion that they should find on the other end of the phone when they call. I want to make people pause and think carefully about what listening is and what they do when people talk to them. I hope that most people will really engage with the emotions that I can see on the faces of the Samaritans and wonder what it is they are hearing. Q
Finally, are you planning a follow up project? Q
I would like to continue exploring listening: to study people who listen professionally. Not necessarily those who just listen to people but who listen in all sorts of ways. I heard Dame Evelyn Glennie on the radio just recently talking about active listening and I would love to work with her about it. Turn over to read more from Sandra, one of the volunteers featured in the pictures below…
What’s next for your project?
My first step is to try and organise an exhibition of the work at my own branch, and I would also like to work it up into perhaps a touring exhibition to show in suitable locations.
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It has been fascinating to see how different people react to callers. Some have very expressive faces and use their body language to reinforce the emotional support they are giving. Others are completely still and visually expressionless as they put all their effort and concentration into listening to everything the caller says.
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Volunteers captured on camera showing their full range of emotions
Spring 2018
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24/7 We're here round the clock
Time for a cuppa on Brew Monday! On 15 January, Samaritans' Brew Monday raised the temperature of the nation with thousands of people getting together for a hot cuppa and chat. Now in its second year, Samaritans helped to brighten up a day that is often referred to as ‘blue Monday’ by turning it into a chance for people to catch up with friends, family and colleagues over a brew. Sandra, volunteer at Lewisham branc h
Healing through listening Listening volunteers come from many walks of life. Sandra, one of the volunteers featured in Phillip's project (see pages 6-7), explains how becoming a volunteer has helped her. “I’ve been a volunteer for three years. My niece took her own life in 2012 and we really struggled as a family to come to terms with it as we are so close. We were at a loss to understand why she felt unable to tell us what she was going through. It took another two years before I was ready to apply to be a Samaritan.
prepared to deal with the wide spectrum of calls that we might receive. Being a volunteer has helped me understand why my niece reached her decision to end her own life, and it has enabled me to share what I have learnt with my family to take away some of the blame we all felt. Being a Samaritan has taught me I’m not always right, and that other people’s opinions do matter and it’s worth taking the time to listen. I feel lucky that my life is safe and settled, but the calls always remind me that my situation could always change.”
I’m not going to lie, the training was hard to begin with. By the time I finished it, I felt
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To find out more about our training and what becoming a listening volunteer means, get in touch on 03705 62 72 82 or email volunteering@samaritans.org
Volunteers, staff and celebrity supporters were out in force in rail stations across the UK to talk with passing commuters and help take away the Monday blues. If you spotted us while you were out and about that Monday, we hope you stopped by for a chat and picked up one of our special Brew Monday tea bags.
What’s your flavour?
New this year was a chance to discover what type of brew you really are and how finely tuned your listening skills are too.
Over 5,000 supporters – curious to know whether they’re a builders’ brew, peppermint tea or perhaps a smooth latte – tested their listening skills by completing our online quiz. We’d like to thank everyone that completed the quiz and discovered their inner brew!
Eight out of ten believe getting “together for a tea and a talk makes them feel better. ”
Ross Noble's cuppa… Photo Richard
Stow
Celebrities stirring it up
Brew Monday got some fantastic shouts on the day from some of our celebrity supporters – here’s what some of them had to say about the importance of a cuppa and a chat! “Drinking tea is a moment to take for yourself, a moment of calm and I do think it’s best enjoyed with family and friends” Olly Alexander, singer-songwriter “I drink more tea than anyone I know. It’s my oldest ally” Carl Barat, Libertines musician “Even if a cuppa isn’t for you, Brew Monday is a reminder to find time in your day to have a chinwag with your family and mates” Ross Noble, comedian
Brew Monday #BrewMonday
Brew
Monday
#BrewM
onday
Spring 2018
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24/7 We're here round the clock
Turn talking into action Thanks in part to supporters like you taking part in our Local Action Saves Lives campaign, most councils in England and Wales now have a suicide prevention plan. But the Government recognises that there's still more councils can do.
Your actions can save lives
Although self-harm is often a person’s way of coping with difficult feelings and circumstances, it is usually a sign of serious emotional distress which indicates that a person needs support to help them deal with the underlying problems that are causing this. Research shows that people like Gina, who have self-harmed, are at a higher risk of suicide in future compared to people who haven't.
samaritans.org/springnews
n o i t c a Local lives saves
* University of Oxford (n.d.). Multi-centre study of self-harm in England.
Suicide is preventable, not inevitable. That’s why our role is to make sure that local councils are taking this seriously and that support is at hand for people at risk.
Take action today by visiting the more of us who show local councils we care, the more likely they are to act. Please take action online today.
Each year, at least
200,000 people arrive at hospitals due to self-harm in England and Wales.*
Gina
When all else failed, Gina called Samaritans “One evening I took steps to end my life. Before I went through with it, I made one last plea for help. I called Samaritans.” Gina had depression as a teenager, and in her early 20s, she found herself overwhelmed with pressure at work. Just finding the energy to get up in the morning and face work seemed impossible. Gina tried to confide in people she should have been able to trust. But she didn’t get the support she needed. Feeling isolated and alone, she turned to self-harm as a way of coping with the pain she faced each day.
Eventually, Gina’s depression and anxiety spiralled – affecting her home and work life. She could no longer cope and decided to end it all. But Gina was strong enough to contact Samaritans. Samaritans listened and gave Gina the space she needed to talk honestly about her feelings. This helped her break the spiral of anxiety, believe in herself and begin to gain control of her life.
“They gave me courage and strength to keep going. Thanks to that volunteer I got home safely that night.” Spring 2018
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24/7 We're here round the clock
Making a song and dance about Jamie If you’re an avid theatre fan you may have heard about the hit musical ‘Everybody’s Talking about Jamie'. But did you know it was inspired by the true story of Jamie and his mum, Margaret?
‘Singing away the blues’ Anyone who sings will tell you that it lifts the spirit and leaves them feeling good about themselves. It helps to brush away the blues! Samaritans is inviting choirs to do what they do best – Sing for Samaritans! It’s a new way for communities to get behind our work and raise funds for Samaritans. One particular choir, has led to a partnership between Samaritans Powys and The Bracken Trust. Their Cancer Support Centre supports people living with cancer and their families. They empower people to live with, through and beyond cancer.
Trust members have formed a singing therapy group, which helps those taking part to let go by singing together each week. They also put on concerts to help raise funds and awareness. And this is where Sing for Samaritans comes in and as one of their charity partners Samaritans Powys has benefitted from the funds they raise. After a recent event Christine, from The Bracken Trust Singers said: “It was an excellent occasion for both groups to participate in and enjoy. We are already talking about another Sing event with Samaritans in the coming year." Open up your lungs for Samaritans!
Are you in a choir or singing group and inspired to Sing for Samaritans? If so, sign up at samaritans.org/sing or contact Beth at fundraising.ideas@samaritans.org 13
Margaret is one of our listening volunteers at our Central Durham branch. Her son Jamie starred in BBC documentary ‘Jamie: Drag Queen at 16’ back in 2011, after he was banned from his school prom for attending in drag. Their story has been turned into a musical, which premiered at the Sheffield Crucible in February 2017. And it’s now transferred to the West End where it opened to rave reviews and lots of media attention – largely focusing on Jamie and Margaret!
“We’re hoping this show helps change opinions; that it makes people think, be more accepting of others and helps you to believe you can do whatever you want to do.” Because of Margaret’s connection to Samaritans, the cast and crew from the West End show have been fundraising on our behalf, with events including a ‘singsong’ fundraiser. If Jamie’s story has inspired you to do your own Sing for Samaritans fundraiser, contact Beth on fundraising.ideas@samaritans.org for details.
Margaret says: “We didn’t see the show until press night in Sheffield, when Jamie and I watched it together for the first time. It’s bizarre how much of it is true to life! It was very emotional watching our lives rewind back on stage. The show has a really positive message – it’s all about acceptance. If everybody was just a little bit more caring… the world would be a much nicer place and Samaritans wouldn’t be as busy as we are.”
Actor Luke Bayer and Margaret
yer and Actor Luke Ba
Jamie
‘Everybody’s Talking About Jamie’ runs until 6 October 2018 at the Apollo Theatre in London. Tickets start from £20.
Spring 2018
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Pedal power takes Tara from fundraising cycling challenge to the Invictus Games Samaritans volunteer Tara Robertson proved herself as a competent sportswoman after competing in the Invictus Games last October, where she came 4th and 5th in her road cycling
events. Tara has also used her sporting prowess to fundraise for Samaritans proving, despite injury, no obstacle is insurmountable. A former Army Private, Tara was medically discharged with a traumatic brain injury, following bomb blasts at the army barracks where she was based in Northern Ireland. After making a miraculous recovery, Tara began volunteering for Samaritans. Tara explains: “Having been in a situation where I've needed support myself, I know how limited support services are. Samaritans is always there – that’s invaluable to so many people. “In 2015 I chose to cycle from Land’s End to John O’Groats. Having set myself the challenge, people wanted to know who I was cycling for. So I decided to raise funds for Samaritans and, as a listening volunteer, it was the obvious choice!” Cycling an incredible 1004 miles in 14 days raised almost £1800. For her next challenge on two wheels she’s in training for a place on the UK team at this year’s Invictus Games in Sydney. Good luck Tara!
Dave with his med
als
Dave ‘the running telephone’ Marathon effort for Dave Lock, of Essex, as he clocks up his 20th London Marathon! Dave has run every marathon in fancy dress costumes, from a giant cake to Big Ears, but he's most famous for running as a giant green telephone. Dave says he’s as proud as ever to represent Samaritans in his iconic giant green phone. “I first got involved with Samaritans when I started as a listening volunteer at Waltham Forest branch. My interest in the charity began when I was struggling and going through some tough times. Samaritans helped me to cope. When I'm running a marathon I always focus on how I am helping that person who may also need a helping hand – it always helps me to carry on to the finish line. My fundraising ensures that Samaritans are always on the end of a phone to help someone in need.
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My training is going well so far. People will be able to see me running in a green telephone in Epping Forest as I gear up to the full 26.2 miles. Running helps me feel good and keep my sanity. It might be my 20th marathon in London but I still love taking part as much as the first time I ran it – it always feels like the whole of London is cheering you on.” To sponsor Dave 'the running telephone' donate via: samaritans.org/springnews
London Marathon 2018 = Dave’s 20th consecutive London Marathon and his 50th marathon overall Dave’s run 28 out of 48 marathons for Samaritans Number of miles Dave’s run in costume in sponsored marathons
= 1600 miles
Samaritans listening tips
S.H.U.S.H.
1. Show you care
S
2. Have patience
H
3. Use open questions
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4. Say it back
S
5. Have courage
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Focus on the other person, make eye contact, put away your phone
It may take time and several attempts before a person is ready to open up
That need more than a yes/no answer, and follow up eg ‘Tell me more’
To check you’ve understood, but don’t interrupt or offer a solution
Don’t be put off by a negative response and, most importantly, don’t feel you have to fill a silence
Samaritans is a charity registered in England and Wales (219432) and in Scotland (SC040604) Samaritans, The Upper Mill, Kingston Road, EWELL KT17 2AF