Survivor Resources
Information, resources, and practices for anyone impacted by sexual violence.
CARE
Welcome to CARE,
We would like to welcome you to our office! Feel free to make yourself at home. We at CARE are committed to providing you the support and resources you need. This booklet contains information on exercises, techniques, and resources that may be helpful to anyone impacted by sexual violence, relationship violence, or stalking. While it is impossible to control all of the ways that we respond to adversity, these resources are meant to help individuals build their own path to healing. Some of these resources may work for you while others may not. People’s personal history, experiences with trauma or adversity, identities, and support systems can all play a role in the ways that they seek justice and heal. This is an introduction to the many resources available to you; we encourage you to explore more options either individually or with guidance from us or others.
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Contents
4 Survivor Rights & Options
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Rights & Resources
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Healing & Processing
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6 What we do at CARE 7 Reporting Options: University 8 Reporting Options: Police 10 Consent Culture 14 Mindfulness 16 Breathing Exercises 18 Defusion 20 Coping & Self-Care Exercises 22 Journal Prompts 24 Trauma & the Brain 26 Sources and Resources Community Partners
28 Rape Victim Advocates 30 Center on Halsted 32 City of Evanston–Victim Services 33 Life Span 34 Porchlight Counseling 35 Other Chicago Resources 36 Personal Notes 3
Survivor Options and Rights At CARE we advocate for your right: • to seek and receive support • to confidentiality • to be treated with dignity and respect, without prejudice or discrimination • to accurate information, presented in a way that you understand • to ask questions and receive answers • to define and control the steps you take • to make your own decisions and change your mind
Legal Protection Options Sexual Assault A Civil No Contact Order can be obtained with or without a criminal case. The judge can grant any or all of the following remedies: • Prohibit contact with the victim • Order the offender to stay away from victim and specific locations • Order the protection of property and pets • Order the offender to transfer to another school • Other protections deemed necessary
You have the option: • to report or decline to report to the university, university police, or local police • to explore existing resources for counseling, victim advocacy, legal assistance, and other services on campus and in the community • to request assistance with academic, housing or other accommodations, or protective measures, if they are reasonably available, regardless of whether one chooses to report the crime to campus police or local law enforcement • to report retaliation by anyone, student, staff, or faculty, for filing an institutional report • to file a complaint with the U.S. Department of Justice or the U.S. Department of Education Office for Civil Rights
Domestic Violence An Order of Protection, also sometimes informally called a “restraining order,” is a court order that is intended to stop violent and harassing behavior. The judge can grant remedies including: • Prohibition of abuse, harassment, neglect • Exclusive possession of a shared home • Stay away from work, school, etc. • No contact by any means including through third parties
At the hospital, you have the right: • to free emergency room services including a general exam, Evidence Collection kit (within 7 days), and STI testing • to free medications including, but not limited to, emergency contraception as well as HIV and STI prophylaxis • to file a police report in the emergency room, at a later date, or not at all • to have an advocate present in the ER • to request or decline any of these services
Stalking A No Contact Order can be issued after as few as two instances of unwanted contact. The judge can grant any or all of the following remedies: • Prohibit further stalking or threats of stalking • Prohibit contact with the victim • Order stalker to stay away from specific locations • Prohibit stalker from having a Firearm Owner's Identification (FOID) card and owning firearms • Other injunctive relief necessary to protect the victim Immigration Status The U Visa is a nonimmigrant visa which is set aside for victims of crimes (and their immediate family members) who have suffered substantial mental or physical abuse and are willing to assist law enforcement and government officials in the investigation or prosecution of the criminal activity. For more on legal protections, see Life Span (pg. 33)
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Rights & Resources
In this section: CARE 6 University Reporting Options 8 Police 10 Consent Culture 12
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What we do at CARE CARE is a confidential space for students impacted by sexual violence, relationship violence or stalking, including friends and partners of survivors.
Confidential Support Services CARE can provide a space to process, ask questions, safely plan, and learn more about the impact of trauma. We also host a trauma support group. Confidential Advocacy Services CARE can connect with legal and medical advocacy, free counseling and support groups on and off campus. Education CARE trains by request on consent, healthy sexuality, relationship violence, and stalking, including Support Starts Here on supporting survivors.
How do I make an appointment? CARE uses an online appointment program available on our website. Calls and emails are also welcome. What are CARE services like? CARE can be an informal space to process, connect with resources, or figure out next steps. We see some students for a single appointment, and work with others more regularly, particularly as an advisor through the Title IX process. How do I know CARE is right for me? We are here to talk about anything related to sexuality, hooking up, or relationships. CARE is an affirming space and welcomes students of all identities and experiences. Services are available regardless of whether the experience occurred before attending Northwestern.
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Con n
ns o i t c e
CARE is happy to share our connections with agencies in the area who offer free services such as counseling, support groups, or medical or legal advocacy. Some of these agencies are identity or community specific, and others offer specific services, such as emergency shelter or art therapy. The resources section has a few examples.
CARE's Mission:
to create a culture of healthy sexuality at Northwestern University where sexual violence, relationship violence, and stalking are not tolerated.
Our office
633 Emerson Street 3rd Floor Evanston, IL 60208 CARE@northwestern.edu www.northwestern.edu/care
(847) 491-2054
CARE
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Reporting Options: University Reporting to the University The University Policy on Sexual Misconduct is applicable to students, staff and faculty. This policy can be found online at bit.ly/psmnu. If you have experienced sexual assault, relationship violence, stalking, sexual exploitation, or sexual harassment, there are several ways to work with University staff regarding your concern. Here are some of them: Filing a report You can use the sexual misconduct reporting form if you or someone you know has experienced an incident of sexual violence, relationship violence, stalking, sexual harassment and/or sexual exploitation and the person responsible is a Northwestern student or faculty member (bit.ly/ NUReportSexualMisconduct). This report can be filled out anonymously; you are not required to provide your name, email, or phone number. CARE advocates can guide you through this process as an advisor if you wish. You are also welcome to email the Title IX Coordinator directly with a report, or call the office or set up a meeting. Once a report is made, the person who experienced the misconduct and any third parties named in the report (not the offender) will receive email outreach from the Deputy Title IX Coordinator with resources and information about the Title IX process. They do not have to respond, but may choose to ask questions or set up an initial inquiry. Responding does not automatically start an investigation. Participating in an investigation Making a report to the University can involve the University Hearing and Appeals System (UHAS) if a survivor chooses. UHAS is separate from any legal or criminal process and is designed to address campus-related concerns. All staff affiliated with UHAS are specifically trained in responding to reports of sexual misconduct, stalking, and dating and domestic violence.
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To get a better picture of the process, check out the graphic on the next page. If you are a student, staff, or faculty member who has witnessed or been the target of an act of bias, hate, discrimination, or harassment, the Respect NU website offers more information on policies and reporting. Informal support The University offers accommodations and reasonable measures to provide immediate support and added protection to an individual who has experienced sexual misconduct. Such measures can include, but are not limited to: • Changes in academic assignments or schedules • Changes in living arrangements (including requests to move within on campus housing as well as temporary or long term on campus housing to students who reside off campus) • Changes to work or research schedules or assignments • Assistance in requesting academic allowances • Issuance of a formal request that the offender cease current behaviors • Issuance of a No Contact Directive, a formal request that the Northwestern community members involved in an incident have no contact with one another • Time off from class or work, or a leave of absence • Transportation arrangements These interim measures and accommodations can be made available regardless of whether an individual chooses to report an incident to the University or law enforcement, and come at no cost to the individual. The University will keep confidential any accommodations or protective measures provided, to the extent that maintaining such confidentiality would not impair the ability of the institution to provide the protective measures or accommodations.
Overview of the University process for panel hearings
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Initial Inquiry Meet with a Title IX staff member to talk about what happened and learn about the process. They will help determine next steps regarding resolution of your complaint. Regardless of whether you pursue an investigation, the office can offer informal measures that may be helpful, such as academic accommodations or a no contact directive.
Our Office
Investigator Meetings If your concern will be resolved using a panel process, there will likely be multiple (typically two) meetings with investigators. At the first, you can share with them what happened, bring any evidence, such as text messages, and suggest witnesses. At subsequent meetings they typically ask follow up questions after connecting with the respondent and any witnesses.
1800 Sherman Ave Evanston, IL 60201 Suite 4500 sexualmisconduct@northwestern.edu www.northwestern.edu/sexual-misconduct/
Report You, the respondent, and panel members (see Step 4) will receive a report of the information collected from meetings with all parties and related findings of fact around what occurred.
(847) 467-6871
Panel Soon after you will have the opportunity to meet with a panel of 3 staff or faculty who have volunteered and been trained to serve as panel members. You and the respondent will meet with the panel individually. You will have 5 minutes to make an opening statement to the panel, space in between to answer the panel’s questions, and 5 inutes to make a closing statement to the panel. Your statements may respond to the information in the report, as well as addressing the impact of the experience. Letter of Findings You will be notified of the decision of the panel based on the information they were able to gather. If someone is proven responsible the letter will also include any sanctions. Appeal You and the respondent are each allowed to appeal the decision to a separate appeals panel. This process takes place in writing only. Typically, sanctions do not apply until after an appeal decision is reached.
For full details, see the Title IX website. www.northwestern.edu/ sexual-misconduct/ index.html
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Reporting Options: Police There are many ways people choose to seek justice, and some may report sexual violence, relationship violence, or stalking to local law enforcement or the university. It is important to note that there is no “right” choice in choosing to report or not to, and no one should be pressured to do so. Reporting to the Police Officers at both the Northwestern University Police Department and the Evanston Police Department receive special training in responding to sexual assault reports. Both departments can guide survivors through the process. When speaking with the police, a survivor may choose to have an advocate present and will be interviewed twice: 1. The first interview is brief and includes information about when and where the incident occurred. It is conducted so investigators have enough information to complete a preliminary investigation. It usually takes place at the police station or, if the survivor has a forensic exam, hospital. 2. The second interview occurs later and is more in-depth. The survivor may be asked to give a detailed account of the incident. Questions often include the timeline of events, what (if anything) was said, if there was physical assault or injury, if weapons were used, and descriptive features that were noticed about the perpetrator. The officer will likely go over the events of the assault repeatedly with the survivor when writing the report. The extensive questioning of the second interview intends to gather as many details as possible to make the strongest case against the offender. While providing the most comprehensive, accurate details of the crime is helpful, it is important to remember that survivors may often have distorted memories of the event, particularly if they dissociated themselves while the assault occurred. A survivor has the right to
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tell an officer “I don’t remember,” or “I’m not sure,” without penalty, judgement, or suggestion that the assault did not occur. The survivor can request that police keep them updated about the status of the investigation. CARE can help connect you with a legal advocate who is very familiar with this process and subsequent civil or criminal processes, if relevant. Other notes: • Survivors can choose to work with a female or male police officer. • A survivor has up to five years after a sexual assault to make a report to the police and up to three years after an incident of domestic violence or stalking. • If you file a police report, the incident will be a matter of public record, but your name will not be used in connection with this record. More information on the Evanston Police is available in our Community Partners section, page 34
Survivors can talk to a CARE advocate for more information on what may happen if they file a police report.
Marsy's Rights Advocates are available to help ensure these rights
In Illinois, Marsy's Law is a state constitutional amendment that aims to give protections to crime victims. The law ensures these rights:
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The right to be treated with fairness and respect for dignity and privacy and to be free from harassment, intimidation, and abuse throughout the criminal justice process.
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The right to notice and to a hearing before a court ruling on a request for access to any of the victim’s records, information, or communications which are privileged or confidential by law.
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The right to timely notification of all court proceedings.
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The right to communicate with the prosecution.
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The right to be heard at any postarraignment court proceeding in which a right of the victim is at issue and any court proceeding involving a postarraignment release decision, plea, or sentencing.
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The right to be notified of information about the conviction, sentence, imprisonment, and release of the accused.
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The right to timely disposition of the case following the arrest of the accused.
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The right to be reasonably protected from the accused throughout the criminal justice process.
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The right to have the safety of the victim and the victim’s family considered in denying or fixing the amount of bail, determining whether to release the defendant, and setting conditions of release after arrest and conviction.
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The right to be present at the trial and all other court proceedings on the same basis as the accused, unless the victim is to testify and the court determines that the victim’s testimony would be materially affected if the victim hears other testimony at the trial.
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The right to have present at all court proceedings, subject to the rules of evidence, an advocate and another support person of the victim’s choice.
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The right to restitution.
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Consent Culture Defining & refining our understanding of consent
At CARE, we aim to build a culture of consent at Northwestern
A culture of consent values consent in all interpersonal contexts, from hugs to sex to emotional vulnerability and connection. It recognizes and prioritizes personal autonomy in deciding when and how these interactions happen, and acknowledges that consent is vital to building healthy relationships and sexuality. Consent culture is built on respect, equity, boundaries, and listening, and expresses itself in words and actions that reinforce these. We can reflect and work to extend these ideas about consent to all aspects of our lives and relationships.
Northwestern's main principles of consent: Knowing Consent must demonstrate that all individuals understand, are aware of, and agree to the “who,” “what,” “where,” “when,” and “how” of the sexual activity. To be knowing, someone cannot be in a state of incapacitation where these things are not clearly understood.
Active Consent must take the form of “clearly understandable words or actions” – this means that the absence of a “no” is not a “yes.” Consent can be both verbal and nonverbal, and a combination of both is the best way to infer consent.
Voluntary
Present & Ongoing
Consent must be freely given and cannot be the result of force, threats, intimidation, coercion, or fraud. These elements are particularly relevant when power dynamics are present.
Consent to previous sexual activity does not imply consent to later sexual acts; similarly, consent to one type of sexual activity does not imply consent to other sexual acts. Consent may also be withdrawn at any time.
Consent is not present when an individual is incapacitated due to alcohol, drugs, sleep, or other condition. Incapacitation may look different for different individuals, but it is always the responsibility of the person initiating sexual activity to make sure their partner(s) are consenting.
Read more about Northwestern's definition of consent here: bit.ly/psmnu 12
Healing & Processing
This section contains resources to ground oneself and process thoughts and emotions. These techniques might not work for everyone, but they are a great place to start!
In this section: Mindfulness 14 Breathing Exercises 16 Defusion 18 Coping & Self-Care 20 Journal Prompts 22 Trauma & the Brain 24 Sources and Resources 2613
Practicing Mindfulness Basics of Mindfulness Mindfulness
Maintaining a moment-bymoment awareness of our thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and surrounding environment.
1. Direct your attention towards your body. Pay attention to what you are experiencing. You may consider questions like: Are you comfortable? Can you feel your heartbeat? What is your breathing like? 2. Observe the present moment as it is. We’re aiming to pay attention to what is happening around us. Consider your five senses: What can you hear, see, taste, smell, or feel? 3. Let your judgments roll by. When judgments arise during our practice, we can make a mental note of them, and let them pass. 4. Return to observing the present moment as it is. Our minds get carried away in thought. That’s why mindfulness is the practice of returning again and again to the present moment.
Why Mindfulness?
Mindfulness involves paying attention to the world around you in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgementally. This practice increases awareness, clarity, and acceptance of our present reality. One goal of mindfulness is to cultivate a non-judgmental awareness of passing thoughts and emotions. This technique trains the mind to perceive experiences—and even the notion of a “self”—as transient. This technique can alleviate stress and suffering by detaching the mind from pursuing desires or avoiding displeasures. The contemporary, secular practice of mindfulness is loosely derived from traditions of Buddhist meditation.
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Mobile Mindfulness Check out these apps for mindfulness on the go! Apps might not work for everyone, but they come in different styles and voices so don't give up if your first download doesn't work for you! Headspace has both meditation and mindfulness exercises. It is free to download, with more in-app purchases available.
Smiling Mind provides a host of meditation exercises. All of the content on this app is free of charge.
iMindfulness has both meditation and mindfulness exercises. This app costs $2, with more in-app purchases available.
Mindfulness Exercises Practice these throughout the day, especially any time you find yourself getting caught up in your thoughts and feelings. Drop Anchor This is another simple exercise to center yourself and connect with the world around you. Take Ten Breaths This is a quick, simple exercise to center yourself and connect with your environment. 1. Take ten slow, deep breaths. Focus on breathing out as slowly as possible until your lungs are completely empty—then allow them to refill by themselves. 2. Notice the sensations of your lungs emptying. Notice them refilling. Notice your rib cage rising and falling. Notice the gentle rise and fall of your shoulders. 3. See if you can let your thoughts come and go as if they’re just cars passing outside your house. 4. Expand your awareness: simultaneously notice your breathing and your body. Then look around the room and notice what you can see, hear, smell, touch, and feel.
1. Plant your feet on the floor. 2. Push them down—notice the floor beneath you, supporting you. 3. Notice the muscle tension in your legs as you push your feet down. 4. Notice your entire body: the feeling of gravity flowing down through your head, spine, and legs into your feet. 5. Now look around and notice what you can see and hear around you. Notice where you are and what you’re doing.
Notice Five Things This is another simple exercise to center yourself and engage with your environment. 1. Pause for a moment. 2. Look around and notice five things that you can see. 3. Listen carefully and notice five things that you can hear. 4. Notice five things that you can feel in contact with your body (for example, your watch against your wrist, your trousers against your legs, the air on your face, your feet upon the floor, your back against the chair). 5. Finally, do all of the above simultaneously.
© Russ Harris 2009 www.actmadesimple.com reprinted by permission of New Harbinger: www.newharbinger.com
If these exercises don't work for you, try one of these: Breathing Exercises Pg. 16-17
Defusion Exercises Pg. 18-19
Coping & Self-Care Exercises Pg. 20-21
Journal Prompts Pg. 22-23
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Breathing Exercises Timed Breath Sit still and tall somewhere comfortable. Close your eyes and breathe through your nose. Pick a count for your inhale, and then pick a little longer count for your exhale. If the 2-4 count feels too short, try increasing the breath lengths to 4 in and 6 out, 6 in and 8 out, and so on. If longer breaths create any anxiety, there is no need to push yourself.
Try to do 5 minutes of this exercise. Calming exercise
Exhale gently, for a count of four.
Inhale deeply for a count of two.
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Hold the breath out for a count of one.
Hold the breath in for a count of one.
Breath Counting Sit still and tall somewhere comfortable. Gently close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Then let the breath come naturally without trying to influence it.
To begin the exercise, count “one” to yourself as you exhale.
Focusing exercise
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The next time you exhale, count “two,” and so on up to “five.”
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4 3 Then begin a new cycle, counting “one” on the next exhalation.
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Try to do 10 minutes of this exercise.
Simply return to "one" and continue as before.
If you find yourself at a number past five, note that your attention has wandered.
4-7-8 Exercise Sit still and tall somewhere comfortable. Keep the tip of your tongue against the ridge behind your upper front teeth throughout the exercise. You will be exhaling through your mouth around your tongue. Try pursing your lips slightly if this seems awkward. If you have trouble holding your breath, speed up the exercise but keep the ratio of 4:7:8 for the three phases.
Close your mouth and inhale quietly through your nose to a mental count of four.
Try to do 2 minutes of this exercise. Calming exercise
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Hold your breath for a count of seven.
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Repeat the cycle three more times for a total of four breaths.
Exhale completely through your mouth to a count of eight, making a whoosh sound with the air.
The Stimulating Breath For this exercise, you will breathe rapidly through your nose, keeping your mouth closed but relaxed. Your breaths in and out should be equal in duration, but as short as possible. This is a noisy exercise.
Try to do 15-60 seconds of this exercise. Energizing exercise
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Close your mouth and try for three inhale-exhale breath cycles per second, producing a quick movement of the diaphragm. Keep your first try under 15 seconds.
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Each time you practice this exercise, you can increase your time by five seconds until you reach a full minute.
If these exercises don't work for you, try one of these: Mindfulness Exercises Pg. 12-13
Defusion Exercises Pg. 16-17
Coping & Self-Care Exercises Pg. 18-19
Journal Prompts Pg. 20-21
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Defusion Basics
Elements of Defusion
Defusion
Defusion relies on our ability to get some distance from the words or images in our heads. By actively noticing our thoughts, we can better understand how our mind is shaping the way we see and interact with the world and may allow us to better control emotional responses.
Stepping back from our thoughts, images and memories and separating or detaching ourselves from them.
Here are some foundational ways to distinguish between our minds and thoughts: Treat Our Brains as Separate Entities We can treat our brain as separate from us, as if it was another person. (i.e. well, there goes my brain again.” “My brain is anxious again.”) This practice allows us to step back from our thoughts and consider a new perspective, while also thinking about how our brains are operating.
This allows us to see thoughts as they are, becoming more aware of thinking as an active, ongoing, relational process that is positioned both historically and situationally. By understanding our thoughts as a process, we may let go of struggling with them.
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Label Our Thoughts and Emotions, or Verbally Defuse When our brain produces a thought, we literally label it as a thought. For example, instead of “I’m worthless”, we say “I’m having the thought that I’m worthless.” Then add another level of separation by saying, “I notice I’m having the thought that I’m worthless.”
at .. th e ot ic In
While mindfulness techniques encourage us to pay attention to the world around us, defusion directs that attention inwards, to a person's thoughts. Defusion is achieved by stepping back from our thoughts to consider them as a process and language.
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Why defusion?
Undermine the Power of Language When there's a word that negatively hooks us, we can identify the word and the feelings or memories that it brings up. Then, we say it aloud repeatedly, slowly at first but then increasingly faster and faster. Similar to how repeating a word enough makes it lose its meaning, this practice first allows us to reflect on a word and its impact on us, and then gain a different perspective on it.
Defusion Exercises
Passengers on a Bus Metaphor Imagine you are driving a bus. The passengers on your bus are negative thoughts, fear, sadness, and self-defeat. You decide these are unhelpful passengers. They yell at you. They try to distract you. They criticize your driving. They try to tell you which way to go. Yet, you are the driver, you are in control, not them. No matter how badly the passengers behave, you don’t have to do what they say. You can steer the bus in any direction you want to go. They are just passengers, you are the driver.
Pop-Up Mind Imagine your thoughts, feelings, emotions, and bodily sensations are like Internet pop-up ads that just keep popping up, even when you least want them to. You can simply let them pop up, and then close them one by one.
ALERT!
Unwanted thoughts and feelings.
Leaves on a Stream Metaphor Imagine sitting alongside a beautiful stream with slowly moving water. The water flows over rocks, under trees and around corners. Every now and then, a big leaf drops into the stream and floats away down the stream. You watch the leaves float away. Each time a thought pops into your head, imagine the thought is written on a leaf in the stream. Your thought might be written in words on the leaf or might be a picture drawn on it. Just sit beside the stream and watch the leaves with your thoughts, one by one, float away. Don’t try to speed them up or slow down the water. Don’t try to change the thought on the leaf. If you get distracted, just stop and notice that you got distracted, then go back to sitting by the stream and watching the leaves float away.
Adapted from “Finding Life Beyond Trauma: Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to Heal from Post-Traumatic Stress and Trauma-Related Problems.” Follette, Victoria M., Ph.D, and Pistorello, Jacqueline, Ph.D. 2007.
If these exercises don't work for you, try one of these: Mindfulness Exercises Pg. 12-13
Breathing Exercises Pg. 14-15
Coping & Self-Care Exercises Pg. 18-19
Journal Prompts Pg. 20-21
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Coping & Self-Care Exercises Coping Skills are methods a person uses to deal with stressful situations. Obtaining and maintaining good coping skills takes practice; however, utilizing these skills becomes easier over time. Most importantly, good coping skills make for good mental health. This list of coping skills is not meant to be comprehensive, but to give you ideas of ways to coping during stressful situations. If something doesn’t work for you, then try another. Physical Activity 1. Go for a swim 2. Go running 3. Exercise 4. Stretch 5. Do yoga 6. Climb a tree 7. Skateboard 8. Squeeze a stress ball 9. Go fishing 10. Do pilates 11. Lift weights 12. Go to the gym 13. Perform gymnastics 14. Play with a slip and slide 15. Juggle 16. Dance 17. Bounce a ball 18. Skip rocks 19. Ride a bike 20. Kickbox 21. Wrestle 22. Hit a punching bag Self-Care 1. Practice positive self-talk 2. Breathing techniques 3. Write a list of goals, immediate and future 4. Make a relapse prevention booklet 5. Shower or bathe 6. Paint your nails 7. Make a meal you enjoy 8. Light incense or a candle 9. Take a nap
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Sports & Games 1. Play hacky sack 2. Play soccer 3. Play tennis 4. Play softball/baseball 5. Go bowling 6. Play basketball 7. Play a sport 8. Play on the computer 9. Play board games 10. Play a video game 11. Solve a sudoku puzzle 12. Try a crossword puzzle 13. Do a jigsaw puzzle Smaller Tasks 1. Go for a drive 2. Do your hair 3. Do and fold laundry 4. Drink tea/hot chocolate 5. Clean 6. Hug a teddy bear 7. Play with animals 8. Watch a funny YouTube video 9. Make a list 10. Play with play-dough 11. Count 12. Get dressed up 13. Look up jokes 14. Write down quotes 15. Eat a snack 16. Run your hands under water 17. Read
Hobbies 1. Sew, knit, or embroider 2. Write poetry 3. Take photos 4. Try yo-yo tricks 5. Play guitar 6. Learn to play an instrument 7. Color 8. Sing 9. Play card games 10. Play chess 11. Perform magic tricks 12. Plant a flower/garden 13. Do arts & crafts 14. Doodle 15. Learn a new language 16. Make bracelets 17. Make art 18. Write music 19. Make a scrapbook 20. Fold origami 21. Bake 22. Take a new class 23. Volunteer 24. Start a new collection 25. Watch a movie 26. Watch a favorite TV show Emotional Release 1. Journal 2. Scream into a pillow 3. Hold a rock, or use other grounding techniques 4. Cry 5. Close your eyes for 10 seconds 6. Clench fists and release 7. Write a story 8. Self soothe 9. Do mindfulness exercises
Friends & Family 1. Write a “no send� letter 2. Talk with friends 3. Hug someone 4. Have a sleepover 5. Text a friend 6. Spend time with family 7. Say hello to a stranger 8. Ask for help 9. Mail someone a letter 10. Call someone 11. Hang out with friends 12. Play with siblings 13. Tell someone a story 14. Tell someone a joke Getting Space 1. Go for a walk outside 2. Look at the stars/clouds 3. Sit in nature 4. Take a time out 5. Go to a pet store 6. Pray 7. Meditate 8. Walk away 9. Run errands 10. Listen to music 11. Go to the park
What is missing from this list?
If these exercises don't work for you, try one of these: Mindfulness Exercises Pg. 12-13
Breathing Exercises Pg. 14-15
Defusion Exercises Pg. 16-17
Journal Prompts Pg. 20-21
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Journal Prompts
General, Reflective Journal Prompts • What made you feel comfortable or uncomfortable today? • What was frustrating about today? • What was the best/worst/most challenging thing that happened? • Describe the people you met today. What were your interactions like? • How did people respond to you? • Describe the atmosphere you were in today. Invite reflection on the senses: What did you see? Hear? Smell? Taste? Touch? • Describe an experience you had today/this week? What feelings were brought to the surface? What impact did it have on you, on others? What thoughts did it invoke? Did you learn anything new? • What did you learn about yourself today? This week? • Describe a moment you want to remember.
Positive Journal Prompts • What was accomplished today? This week? • What made you smile today? Describe emotions and thoughts. • When I’m in pain, physical or emotional, the kindest thing I can do for myself is... • Write what you wish others knew about you. • Name a compassionate way you supported a friend this week. Then write how you can do the same for yourself. • Write the words you need to hear. • My favorite way to play is… • How did you feel strong or powerful today? This week? • List three positive things about yourself.
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Journal prompts for trauma or grief • Describe what it feels like to grieve a loss of identity. Who were you before now, and who do you want to become? How have you expressed this grief? • Who has been the most supportive during this healing time? How have they been supportive, how has it changed you? • How has this trauma or issue influenced other aspects of your life: work, family, personal relationships, living situation, and so on? • In what ways has this emotional upheaval made you more vulnerable, and in what ways has it make you less vulnerable? • What have you learned by going through this trauma that now affects the way you make decisions? Write about positive decisions you’ve made or believe you will make as a result of what you went through. • Write a letter to your past self—the self that went through loss or trauma—from your present self. What would you say to comfort that person? What advice would you give? Offer your past self the acceptance and love that they need.
Write your own prompts:
If these exercises don't work for you, try one of these: Mindfulness Exercises Pg. 12-13
Breathing Exercises Pg. 14-15
Defusion Exercises Pg. 16-17
Coping & Self-Care Exercises Pg. 18-19 23
Trauma & the Brain Glossary Brain Basics
Neocortex Cognitive processing, decisionmaking, learning, memory and inhibitory functions Limbic Brain Processes emotions and conveys sensory relays
The Brain During a Traumatic Event
In the instance of trauma, the brain stem shuts down all nonessential body and mind processes, orchestrating survival mode. During this time the sympathetic nervous system increases stress hormones and prepares the body to fight, flee or freeze. The brain's response to trauma can impact the creation of memory. For this reason, it may be difficult to remember what happened when the brain is acting in terms of survival.
What can this look like? • Decisions or action steps you thought you’d make were not accessible • Memories are "cloudy" or “fuzzy” • Emotions may be externally focused (anger, yelling, crying, laughing) or internally focused (calm, withdrawn, numb). They may suddenly shift from one to the other. • Difficulty piecing together your experience; details may be out of order or just missing all together
Brain Stem Survival instincts and autonomic bodily processes
Specific Structures Amygdala Process emotions, specifically linked to fear. Responsible for survival-related threat identification, and tagging memories with emotion. Hippocampus Transfer of information from short-term memory to longterm memory. Prefrontal cortex Regulating emotional responses triggered by the amygdala.
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In a non-traumatic situation, the parasympathetic nervous system shifts the body into restorative mode when a threat ends. This process reduces stress hormones and allows the brain to shift back to regularly using all of its parts. For a brain impacted by trauma, the shift from reactive survival mode to responsive mode never occurs. Instead, the brain stem may hold a person in a reactive state, primed to the presence of threat and supported by dysregulated activity in other brain structures. There are many reasons why some people develop trauma responses and some do not. These include genetics, trauma history, support networks, systemic reactions, the type of event and so much more.
The Brain After a Traumatic Event The hippocampus may lose the ability to discriminate between past and present experiences or interpret environmental contexts correctly. This interruption keeps the mind stimulated in reactive mode, unaware that the threat is in the past. This can trigger extreme stress responses when confronted with environmental situations that only remotely resemble something from a traumatic past. The amygdala may stay in a highly alert and activated loop, looking for and perceiving threats everywhere. Trauma responses can exhibit hyperactivity in the amygdala in response to stimuli that are connected to traumatic experiences, leading to anxiety, panic, and extreme stress.
The prefrontal cortex may see a decrease in functional ability. This explains why people who experience trauma reactions may exhibit fear, anxiety, and extreme stress responses even when faced with stimuli not connected – or only remotely connected – to their experiences from the past.
Experiencing PTSD Symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder are often broken into four different kinds of signs: 1. Re-experiencing the incident. This may include reliving the trauma in some way, such as flashbacks, bad dreams, or frightening thoughts. 2. Avoidance. This may include either staying away from places or people that remind a person of the trauma, isolating oneself from other people, or feeling numb. 3. Hyperarousal. This may include things such as feeling on guard, irritable, or startling easily. 4. Negative thoughts. This may include feelings of guilt or blame, losing interest in activities, or negative thoughts about oneself or the world.
Notes:
How the brain heals Everyone is unique; their healing will be individual. There is no one-size-fits-all or personal guarantee for what will work (and the same process will not work for everyone). However, the majority of evidence suggests that when survivors commit to a process of exploring and testing healing options they can, over a period of time, reduce the effects of trauma and even eliminate symptoms of PTSD.
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Sources and Resources This list of books can provide useful information for both survivors of sexual assault and their loved ones.
Bass, E., & Davis, L. (2008). The courage to heal: a guide for women survivors of child sexual abuse. New York: Harper.
Maltz, W. (2012). The sexual healing journey: a guide for survivors of sexual abuse. New York: William Morrow. 2012.
Bremner JD (2006). Traumatic stress: effects on the brain. Dialogues in clinical neuroscience, 8 (4), 445-61.
Matsakis, A. (1998). Trust after trauma: a guide to relationships for survivors and those who love them. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications.
Boon, S., Steele, K., & Hart, O. V. (2011). Coping with trauma-related dissociation: skills training for patients and their therapists. New York: W.W. Norton.
Rothschild, B. (2000). The body remembers. New York: Norton.
Bouson, J. B. (2009). Embodied shame: uncovering female shame in contemporary womens writings. New York: SUNY Press. Emerson, D. (2017). Overcoming trauma through yoga: reclaiming your body. Berkley: North Atlantic Books. Follette, V. M., & Pistorello, J. (2007). Finding life beyond trauma: using acceptance and commitment therapy to heal from posttraumatic stress and trauma-related problems. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications. Goodwin, J., & Attias, R. (Eds.). (1999). Splintered reflections: images of the body in trauma. New York: BasicBooks. Graber, K. (1991). Ghosts in the bedroom: a guide for partners of incest survivors. Deerfield Beach, FL: Health Communications. Herman, J. L. (2015). Trauma and recovery: aftermath of violence from domestic abuse to political terror. New York: BasicBooks. Huber, C. (2001). There is nothing wrong with you: going beyond self-hate. California: Keep It Simple Books. Johnson, S. (2005). When “I love you� turns violent: recognizing and confronting dangerous relationships. New Jersey: New Horizon Press. Koenigs, M., & Grafman, J. (2009). Posttraumatic Stress Disorder: The Role of Medial Prefrontal Cortex and Amygdala, The Neuroscientist, 15 (5), 540-548.
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Schiraldi, G. R. (2016). The post-traumatic stress disorder sourcebook: a guide to healing, recovery, and growth. New York, NY: McGraw-Hill Education. Shin LM, Rauch SL, & Pitman RK (2006). Amygdala, medial prefrontal cortex, and hippocampal function in PTSD. Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences, 1071, 67-79. Stone, R. D. (2004). No secrets, no lies: how black families can heal from sexual abuse. New York: Harlem Moon, an imprint of Broadway Books. Van Der Kolk, B. (2015). The body keeps the score: brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. New York (New York): Penguin Books. Williams, M. B., & Poijula, S. (2016). The PTSD workbook. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, Inc.
Community Partners
In this section: Rape Victim Advocates 28 Center on Halsted 30 City of Evanston–Victim Services 32 Life Span 33 Porchlight Counseling 34 Other Chicago Resources 35 Personal Notes 3627
Rape Victim Advocates Rape Victim Advocates offers crisis intervention counseling, individual and group counseling, and medical and legal advocacy in Chicago as well as youth and adult prevention education.
About Rape Victim Advocates
RVA is an independent, not-forprofit organization dedicated to the healing and empowerment of sexual assault survivors. RVA offers non-judgmental crisis intervention, individual and group counseling, and medical and legal advocacy in the greater Chicago metropolitan area. RVA also provides public education and institutional advocacy in order to improve the treatment of sexual assault survivors and to effect positive change in public policies and attitudes toward sexual assault. All of RVA's services are free of charge. Languages available: English, Spanish
Services:
Crisis Intervention RVA provides high-quality 24-hr crisis support for victims of sexual violence and any non-offending family members or friends who accompany them to the emergency departments at 14 Chicago area hospitals. This crisis support includes crisis counseling, information about their rights regarding law enforcement and medical care, including emergency contraception, information and support regarding the criminal justice process as well as non-criminal justice options, assistance with immediate shelter, clothing, transportation and locksmith services, accompaniment to the police station if necessary, and appropriate referrals to other needed services. Medical Advocacy At no cost to the rape victim, RVA staff advocates provide follow-up services related to ongoing medical treatment, including issues with medical billing and accessing medications, such as emergency contraception. Legal Advocacy At no cost to the rape victim, RVA staff advocates provide accompaniment for survivors to police stations, throughout the court process, and to obtain an Order of Protection, Civil No Contact Order or Stalking No Contact Order. They also provide assistance with filing for crime victims’ compensation and referrals for other services. They can also discuss alternatives to the criminal justice system and provide referrals for any work or school related issues. The legal advocate liaisons with uniform police officers, sex crimes detectives and the State’s Attorney Office to ensure proper charges are pursued and filed. Counseling Our trained, professional staff provides individual, couples, and family counseling for adolescent and adult victims/survivors of sexual violence and their loved ones, as well as support groups. These services are provided in our offices and off site.
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Education and Training We provide education and prevention programs for schools and religious, community and social organizations; prevention programs for adolescents, youth and adults; professional workshops and trainings for social workers and school or business administrators. Additionally, we offer specialized training for health care and law enforcement personnel regarding our services, Illinois law including the Sexual Assault Survivors Emergency Treatment Act (SASETA), Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, evidence collection kits, etc. Trainings are custom-designed for the audience. Institutional Advocacy RVA works with and on behalf of all victims/survivors to ensure sensitive, effective policies and practices when institutions such as the criminal justice system, the healthcare system, and others respond to sexual violence. Volunteer and Internship Opportunities RVA offers a wide variety of volunteer and internship opportunities, including direct service and administrative roles. We provide extensive training and support for qualified individuals who want to give back to their community through RVA and be part of the movement to end sexual violence.
Central Office
180 N. Michigan Ave., Suite 600 Chicago, IL 60601 info@rapevictimadvocates.org www.rapevictimadvocates.org
(312) 443-9603
Other Offices: Stroger Hospital Office Fantus Health Center 1901 W. Harrison St. Chicago IL, 60612 Northside Satellite Office 1945 W. Wilson Avenue, Suite 6114 Chicago, IL 60640 Austin Satellite Office 4909 W. Division St., Suite 511 Chicago, IL 60651 YWCA RISE Chidren's Center 820 W. Jackson St., Suite 550 Chicago, IL 60607
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Center on Halsted Center on Halsted houses the Anti-Violence Project, providing crisis support and ongoing services for LGBT, queer, questioning and HIV-affected survivors of abuse and violence.
About the Center on Halsted
Center on Halsted is the Midwest's most comprehensive community center dedicated to building community and securing the health and well-being of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer (LGBTQ) people of Chicagoland. More than 1,000 community members visit the Center every day, located in the heart of Chicago's Lakeview Neighborhood.
Anti-Violence Project
The Anti-Violence Project at the Center on Halsted empowers lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, and HIVaffected communities and allies to end all forms of violence through organizing and education. AVP also supports survivors through counseling and advocacy. Languages available: English, Spanish
Services
LGBTQ Violence Resource Line Center on Halsted’s Violence Resource Line (VRL) was created to provide specific assistance for LGBTQ and HIV+ survivors of violence, along with their allies. The VRL assists callers with safety planning and crime reporting, and it has information on various Chicagoland agencies, including hotlines, shelters and housing, domestic and sexual violence resources, legal and medical assistance, and crime victim compensation. These agencies have been screened by AVP to confirm LGBTQfriendliness and accessibility. The VRL is answered during regular business hours, Monday through Friday, 9 AM-5 PM. Trauma-Focused Therapy AVP provides trauma-focused therapy (individual, group, and couples/relationship) to those who have been impacted by any type of violence or trauma. Our staff are licensed and trained in evidence-based therapies for trauma, especially as it impacts LGBTQ individuals, families, partners, and communities. Center on Halsted's trauma groups can vary over time, but current offerings include: Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) for Trauma A group for individuals who have experienced trauma and have difficulty managing intense emotions and engaging in successful relationships. Based on the four pillars of DBT (mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotion regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness), this group teaches members a variety of skills to help deal with everyday and longstanding concerns. Trauma Recovery Group A goal-oriented group focused on decreasing the impact of trauma on your life through structured work on a specific aspect of recovery.
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Professional Training In addition, we provide regular training to law enforcement agencies, court personnel, rape crisis workers, domestic violence organizations, government agencies, hospitals, mental health providers, schools, and community centers about the specific needs facing LGBTQ, queer, questioning, and HIVaffected victims and survivors of violence. Our training is available to any group or organization interested in issues of discrimination, safety, and advocacy.
Central Office
3656 N. Halsted St. Chicago, IL 60613 www.centeronhalsted.org/ Hours of operation: 8 a.m.-9 p.m. every day
(773) 472-6469
LGBTQ Violence Resource Line (773) 871-CARE (2273) avp@centeronhalsted.org Trauma-Focused Therapy (773) 472-6469 ext. 460 behavioralhealth@centeronhalsted.org Professional Training (773) 661-0740 jpunzo@centeronhalsted.org
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City of Evanston—Victim Services Victim Services provides social services to crime victims and witnesses and to residents seeking social service assistance in non-crime situations.
About Victim Services
The City of Evanston's Victim Services department is run through the Police Department. The department works to incorporate both police and social services to support victims and witnesses of crimes, as well as residents seeking social service in non-crime situations. Languages: English
Police Department 1454 Elmwood Ave. Evanston, IL 60201 www.cityofevanston.org
(847) 472-6469
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Services
Overview The City of Evanston's Victim Services department provides social services to crime victims and witnesses and to residents seeking social service assistance in non-crime situations. • Medical advocacy for sexual assault, domestic violence and physical abuse • Referrals or assistance in obtaining Orders of Protection • Court advocacy to assist victims and witnesses through the criminal justice system, including status on court dates andmeetings with State’s Attorney • Domestic violence: information, safety planning and shelter referrals. • Assist with filing for monetary reimbursement
Life Span Life Span empowers survivors of domestic and sexual violence to demand safety as a human right through client-centered services and leads social change through accountability, community engagement, and systemic advocacy.
About Life Span
Life Span is an agency which combines counseling, advocacy, and legal services to offer a comprehensive approach to ending violence. They recognize the needs of underrepresented populations and have created several projects to address these issues. In their advocacy and policy work, Life Span uses what they have learned from helping their clients to create systemic change that positively impacts survivors of domestic and sexual violence. Languages: English, Spanish, Arabic, Polish
Services
Domestic Violence Legal Services • Protection Orders • Divorce • Child Custody • Immigration Assistance • Criminal Justice Advocacy • Individual and Group Counseling Sexual Assault Legal Services • Protection Orders • Advocacy with Title IX complaints • Criminal Justice Advocacy • Immigration Assistance VOICES Life Span has partnered with the Cook County State’s Attorney’s Office on a grant called Violence on Illinois Campuses Elimination Strategies Program (VOICES). The VOICES grant focuses on victims of sexual assault, domestic violence, dating violence and stalking who are enrolled in a college, university, or higher learning institution in Cook County. The goal of this grant is to increase victim’s access to services and protections needed to live safe and productive lives and to increase offender accountability.
Central Office
70 E. Lake Street Suite 700 Chicago, IL 60601 life-span@life-span.org www.life-span.org
(312) 408-1210
Daley Center Courthouses: Rolling Meadow Skokie
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Porchlight Counseling Services Porchlight Counseling Services provides counseling to individuals in the Chicagoland area who were sexually assaulted during college (both current and former students).
About Porchlight
Porchlight Counseling Services exists to help college sexual assault survivors achieve healing and wholeness and to create a world in which a person’s life is not defined by the devastating experience of sexual assault. We offer counseling to all students, regardless of gender, who have been sexually assaulted during college or graduate school. We also provide counseling to adults who are no longer in college but who were assaulted while they were in school. Languages: English, Spanish
Central Office
1740 Ridge Avenue, Evanston, IL 60204 www.porchlightcounseling.org/
(773) 750-7077
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Services
Counseling Porchlight offers free services for all students who have survived sexual assault while in college. Porchlight offers both individual therapy and group therapy. They have private, easily accessible offices in downtown Chicago, Lakeview, Rogers Park, Oak Park and Evanston. Every student gets 25 sessions during their time with Porchlight, with an entirely flexible arrangement. Porchlight's goal is to provide long-term, professional counseling that is non-judgmental and confidential. Our counselors are highly-qualified Licensed Clinical Social Workers (LCSWs), Licensed Clinical Professional Counselors (LCPCs), and PhD-level therapists who specialize in sexual assault counseling and trauma recovery. We aim to provide these services quickly and at no charge to our clients in order to help sexual assault survivors heal and reclaim their lives.
Other Chicago Resources YWCA—Evanston/North Shore YWCA provides the only comprehensive residential domestic violence program in the northeastern Chicago metropolitan area. In efforts to address domestic violence on all levels, the program is comprised of six primary elements: • 24-hour domestic violence hotline in Spanish and English — (877) 718-1868 • Emergency shelter (Mary Lou's Place) • Community-based services • Legal advocacy • Relationship violence prevention • Community outreach and education Kan-Win KAN-WIN works to empower Asian American survivors and engage the community through culturally competent services, community education and outreach, and advocacy. They are known for their work with immigrants. Services include: • 24-hour crisis hotline in Korean and English, with a translator available — (773) 583-0880 • Legal advocacy • Transitional housing • Case management • Support group Center for Contextual Change The Center is known for its dynamic treatment of trauma, violence and the effects of abusive behaviors. The organization bases its therapeutic process on a unique treatment, The Collaborative Stage Model (CSM). CSM aims to facilitate positive shifts in the client's internal, relational, and environmental worlds. • Counseling Services • Workshops & Trainings Mujeres Latinas en Acción Mujeres provides support for adult survivors of sexual violence, both Spanish and English speaking, at many stages in their recovery. All Sexual Assault staff is Spanish/English bilingual and all services are provided in either English or Spanish (counseling groups are conducted in Spanish). • short-term individual counseling • 15-week educational group • ongoing support group • medical advocacy • legal advocacy
Find more resources like these at wwww.northwestern.edu/care/resources/
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Personal Notes
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Personal Notes
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CARE care@northwestern.edu (847) 491-2054 National Sexual Assault Hotline 1 (800) 656-4673 National Domestic Violence Hotline 1 (800) 799-7233
This project was supported by Grant No. 2014-WA-AX-0006 awarded by the Office on Violence Against Women, U.S. Department of Justice. The opinions, findings, conclusions, and recommendations expressed in this publication are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Department of Justice, Office on Violence Against Women.