How to Navigate a Return to Work Before Going on Maternity Leave

“Pregnancy is work, but as you build your career while you grow your family, it is more than a milestone. It is monumental. The intersection of work and pregnancy is significant, and its importance is something to recognize, to normalize and to celebrate.”

~ Stephanie Kramer, author of Carry Strong: An Empowered Approach to Navigating Pregnancy and Work

With the right support and thoughtful planning, it can be very powerful to unburden your confidence, broaden your perspective and unlock your potential for the journey to working motherhood (and through it). I’m here to discuss the why and how of anticipating your return to work after baby while you’re still pregnant. “Anticipate” is the key word.

Your needs and feelings will likely change when baby arrives, but understanding the possibilities and preparing now helps you see options, when needed, with clarity. This includes assessing your boundaries and current work environment, which helps downregulate the feelings of a looming return to work before going on maternity leave and focus on what you’re looking forward to with your growing family.

Beyond transitioning work responsibilities, preparing coworkers and celebrating this mega moment (take a photo at work!), there are three things to do before going on maternity leave to empower your journey of becoming a working mom.

Do a Walk Through

Physically walk through your workday while pregnant, imagining yourself with baby. Start with when you wake up and contemplate each portion of your day until you’re back home (or if you work from home, when you switch off your “day job”).

Think about what you may need throughout the day (and who), but also how you may feel. Be as detailed as possible, making lists as you go. Ask questions now to relieve what’s on your mind. For example, what does your commute look like and how will that need to change? When you’re at work, is there a mother’s room available, should you be breastfeeding and need to pump? Is it somewhere that needs to be reserved? Where will milk be stored? Go into detail. Are there services available if you need to travel?

Beyond logistics, what are expectations outside of work hours for how you check in (or not)—assess your own boundaries and work responsibilities. What will you need to do if they change after maternity leave?

Ask for a Review

Regardless of formal review process timing, meet with your boss or manager (if you have one) with the purpose of obtaining feedback, versus only discussing off-boarding or timeline for maternity leave. Discuss your performance on day-to-day tasks, long-term plans or projects and your value as a teammate.

This provides a checkpoint, not about your pregnancy, but to know where you stand at work before it becomes a distant priority for a little while. This is also a great time to share your expectations of your manager or coworkers, ask any questions and set up expectations for remaining time at work prior to maternity leave. Positive, clear and collaborative communication is always essential at work, but this is a particularly important moment to practice it. Ultimately, it will help establish gravitas that lasts with your boss and your team—creating a community of support for each other in life moments that intersect with work. Note: If you’re an entrepreneur or work in an environment without a formal review process, take a moment to check in on your goals and touch base with those around you.

Check in with Your “Board of Directors”

As part of your community of support, consider creating or rethinking a personal board of directors. This is a group of your mentors and advocates who help you through important career and personal milestones and crossroads, offering wisdom and advice to guide your thinking. Sometimes they may tell you what you don’t want to hear by asking the right questions.

Being pregnant at work and subsequently becoming a working mom is a big deal. Check in with your “board” for support during the final countdown. Evaluate if you need to add (or subtract) anyone to provide perspectives you may need right now, and when you return to work with a new incredible part of you. Is there a working parent you aspire to on your board? Is there someone who has known you long before a baby was on your radar? What’s most important is that there is a genuine connection, trust and commitment with each other now and as you anticipate your great return (or not). v

Stephanie Kramer is the author of Carry Strong: An Empowered Approach to Navigating Pregnancy and Work (Penguin Life, 2023), an executive, adjunct professor, and proud mother of two young sons.

Do You Work Remotely? Tips from local moms who make it “work”

Samantha Mendoza  Santee

Risk Manager for an engineering firm

Kids ages: 7 months; 6 years

Working from home is a juggling act, but being available to my boys is the best feeling since I grew up in a singlemom household where she was always working. Here is what works for me:

• Clean something different each day. Make a schedule, such as Monday: dishes, Tuesday: bathroom, etc.

• Work on difficult tasks while baby is napping.

• Inform coworkers. I’ve been on calls where my baby is breastfeeding while I’m presenting. I let my coworkers know they may hear my son occasionally.

• Be open and honest with work regarding expectations. My boss is aware that I have kids at home; if I’m unavailable, he knows I’ll call him back when I have a moment.

• Be kind to yourself about expectations.

Deanne Gustafson

Oceanside

Amazon Influencer, content creator, business owner

Kids ages: 4 years; 5½ years

I’ve worked remotely since my kids were born; first part-time, now full-time. Being a stay-at-home mom is tough; trying to do it all while working will likely leave you frustrated and your kids on screens. Here are my tips:

• Work when little ones nap.

• Once your child is on the move, get childcare, whether it’s two days a week, three days or more. Consider family members, friends, daycare and preschool. Even if your paycheck barely covers the cost, you are investing in your child’s socialization and giving yourself the opportunity to do what you love.

• Get an Instacart membership. I rarely go into grocery stores anymore. Yes, it costs a little extra, but saves so much time.

• Use Target drive-up pickup.

• Hire a house cleaner if you can. You’re delegating housework so you can get more work done.

• Make time for your kids. I used to take Mondays off and called them “Mom Mondays.”

• Find mom friends to hang out with. It’s important to have a tribe!

• Take advantage of evenings. When my kids go to sleep, I work.

• Accept that you can’t do it all.

Folake Ike, LCSW, PMH-C

Mission Valley

Licensed Clinical Social Worker Kids ages: 3 months; 2 years

It was extremely difficult in the beginning to balance work, caring for my child and looking after the household. Now that my oldest is in daycare, I’m better at prioritizing tasks. Sometimes my husband and I both work from home, which can present challenges. Here is what has worked for us:

• Communicate.

• Discuss the structure of the week ahead.

• Create a shared calendar on your phones.

• Use a calendar on the fridge.

• Verbalize changes to the schedule.

• Divide and conquer. In the mornings my husband took care of some kitchen duties while I prepped dinner.

• Remind yourself that you’re working. If you were in the office, you wouldn’t be cooking and doing laundry simultaneously.

• Take breaks. It’s OK to sit in silence and regroup instead of using breaktime to do household chores.

• Prioritize. My husband and I collaborate on what’s most important for each of us to accomplish during the day and how can we support each other in those tasks while caring for the children.

• Outsource tasks as needed.

• Recognize that it all won’t get done today and that’s OK. Manage anxiety about long to-do lists by imagining the worst-case scenario if something is taken off today’s list and added to tomorrow’s.

• Start the day doing one thing with mastery. This helps me feel accomplished at the end of the day if nothing else gets done. Sometimes I’m giving myself credit for making one heck of a bed that morning!