Marc Emery update

The Coffeeshop Enigma By LazyStrain

Many of us have been pipe dreaming about the day that we have licensed coffeeshops here in the UK. Foremost, we were thinking about the people that will own these establishments? And the people that will frequent them? We were thinking about smoking pipe in public (not always tolerated in Amsterdam)? About rolling joints on street-side tables after lunch. Then we got thinking about coffeeshop menus, scuff and the sale of hashish? We were thinking about the ‘Cultural Revolution’ that is hitherto to take place here in the UK. Many of these things remain as much of an enigma today, as they did yesteryear. But none the less we began to think…

Before continuing, it’s worth mentioning that we can no longer blame the Police Force for the current state of cultural distension here in the UK. We think it has more to do with the carpet sweepers in White Hall. Anyhow, we are getting of the point. The point is this. Coffeeshops currently remain an enigma here in the UK. There are several places where medicinal use is tolerated (places that are sadly few and far between). There are no doubt scores of inner city smoke-dens where people can still purchase and consume cannabis. But such places operate at the daily risk of the proprietor’s hospitality. So we must ask ourselves, Where does it start? Where could it end?

For starters, will trading within “tolerated” coffeeshops be conducted over or under the counter? Through the front door, or the backdoor? Will “the powers that be” enforce closing times? (or worst still opening times?) What age limits or other obligatory social constructs, such as dress code and wallet weight, will be enforced? What about the geographical and spatial location of coffeeshop outlets? Will decriminalisation extend across every section of the UK? Or will coffeeshops be restricted to areas deemed “culturally affluent” or “socially viable”? Will local councils grant planning permission to coffeeshops as readily as they do, to say, fast-food outlets and public houses? Then there will be some major economic concerns, things like advertising, productivity, and taxation (?) Next there will be questions about the proprietor’s discretion and the coffeeshops’ individual code of conduct? Beyond the question of bag-limits, we mean who does and who doesn’t get served? Will adolescent smokers still be hampered by government agencies, simply because there are no safe places they can smoke? Or will those that are ‘coming of age’ be allowed entry? What about those that don’t want to smoke cannabis in designated coffeeshops? Will customer relations proliferate or simply cease to exist? Do drunks get welcomed with open arms? Cause most of us are totally ashamed to be ‘English/Welsh/Scottish’, when we see those drunken “British” idiots sprawled about the cobbles of Amsterdam. (Stop it! You’re embarrassing yourselves and spoiling it for the rest of us!) Anyhow, will such ‘cretins’ be allowed entry into UK coffeeshops? (we can only hope not!) Will the attitude be live and let live? First come first served? Or “screw you” we’re making money?

Inevitably, there will always be a small section of society that will do their utmost to spoil it for the rest of us! There will always be some people that find discomfort in other people’s pleasure, and those that find pleasure in people’s discomfort. There will always be somebody that cannot handle his/her alcohol. And nine times out of ten, there will be a fight. There will always be crack-heads, smack-heads and addicts! Then there are the age-old issues of territoriality- those that involve gun-crime, rude boys, and “respect”. So we find ourselves asking ‘However will Coffeeshops find safe asylum here in the UK?’ Will the Government, one day, provide cannabis smokers with a sheltered environment in which to smoke cannabis? Perhaps a place that can separate cannabis from alcohol and other hard-drugs (see Clofon)? What we’re really asking is this: Why is it that Coffeeshops remain an enigma here in the UK?

This is a long list of questions to which we at Soft Secrets do not hold any definitive answers. Likewise, we cannot presume that the carpet sweepers in White Hall do either. Hence the present enigma…

We do however recognise that such questions exist, and that any forthcoming answers cannot easily be brushed away! Reflective although often ignored, cannabis laws are what people make of them. At present, in 2005, cannabis laws within the UK are clearly wrong (some may argue negligent). Isn’t it time we did something about changing them, in 2006?

Finnish Grower Kaappikapina

Hydroponic growing in a grow cupboard

The Finnish grower Kaappikapina tells more about his experiences in the growing world. Kaappikapina is a non-commercial grower and only has a very small growing space, but this does not prevent him from achieving huge yields with his new system, after having switched over from growing in soil.

By Bart B

Kaappikapina: “The first grow I ever attempted was about eight years ago. I have never been one for continuous growing, I just do the odd crop now

and again when my supply of smoking material is getting a bit low. Like most growers, I started out by growing in soil, with seeds that came out of some cannabis buds I had bought. I started with growing because at a certain time there simply was no decent quality hash to be got hold of. There was only shit coming onto the market. I also did not have any inclination to start building up connections with dodgy sorts of people just to secure my supply, knowing that this can lead to problems. So I decided to be independent, so that I could choose who I wanted to hang around with.”

By growing you learn to have patience, and you also learn a lot about nature itself. Now my parents ask me why my house plants are so extremely healthy

Hobby without limits

“The first crop went very smoothly and I enjoyed it a lot. There is so much to do when you’re growing, all the theoretical information that you have to put into real practice, the many different varieties from which you can choose, the different growing methods, and so on. I quickly grasped that growing could become

International Growers

A few Chronic plants grown from seed, now 15 days in growth.

a hobby with no limits. Watching the plants develop and reacting, and then eventually harvesting them – that is a wonderful experience. By growing you learn to have patience, and you also learn a lot about nature itself. Now my parents ask me why my house plants are so extremely healthy. After all, you can apply your experience with growing to other plants too. And of course, smoking your own cannabis is always something special.”

Chronic

“I only know a few names of varieties that I have raised so far. I mostly set to work with seeds I had got from friends. And these have been by no means bad seeds. But for the last two grows I’ve done I have got hold of more commercial seeds, and these were the White Widow from White Label, and more recently Serious Seeds’ Chronic. It’s hard for me to choose which variety is my favourite, since all the seeds I

Do you know that the number of fingers on a marihuana leaf can tell you whether the plant has everything to her liking? The more fingers a marihuana plant develops on her leaves, the happier she is with the state of things!