On Entertainment

Montecito at the Movies: The Lowe-down on ‘Grace Point’

into a source of growth, strength, and empowerment? Although love addiction isn’t a clinical diagnosis, the experience of feeling addicted to an ex can be incredibly harmful to your well-being and quality of life. Healing requires an honest look in the mirror – a fundamental shift in your focus away from your ex and onto you.

There are a host of basic psychological skills that you can learn and use to help yourself move on. A few recommendations include the following:

1. Take some space: Set healthy boundaries about when and how you’re willing to communicate with your ex – and limit the amount of time you spend with them.

2. Stop having sex with them: Being sexual with your ex generally makes it harder to let go.

3. Pause Try not to act impulsively: Think before you act – drinking a lot, using drugs to distract yourself, or acting in spiteful/angry ways toward your ex aren’t likely to help in the long run.

4. Increase your self-care and social support: It may seem simple, but getting enough sleep, eating healthy food, exercising, and meeting with trusted friends is key.

5. Challenge unhelpful thoughts: When the content of your thinking is inaccurate or unhelpful, it’s time to practice challenging it.

Using your divorce to understand yourself more deeply and making choices consistent with the life you want to live is what propels you into your next life adventure. For anyone interested in learning more, I just wrote a book on this topic called Letting Go of Your Ex: CBT Skills to Overcome the Pain of a Breakup and Overcome Love Addiction (2023). Come join me for a short talk and book signing at Chaucer’s Santa Barbara on Tuesday, February 21st at 6 pm. Hope to see you there!

by Steven Libowitz

It’s no wonder that the young actor, producer, and TV writer, John Owen Lowe, called watching the world premiere of Grace Point – a thriller that marks his debut as a lead actor in a feature film – at the Metro 4 cinemas at SBIFF last weekend a “surreal experience.”

“I grew up going to that theater,” recalled Lowe, 27, the Montecito-raised son of famed actor Rob Lowe and Sheryl Berkoff Lowe. I have so many formative childhood memories from going there. It’s the first place I ever saw an R-rated movie, which was Wedding Crashers, and it was a huge deal.”

Grace Point was directed by Rory Karpf, a documentary and sports filmmaker whom Lowe met while working on Madness in the Hills, the 2020 documentary directed by his dad about the deadly Montecito debris flows that devastated the neighborhood. The fiction film follows a young man faced with addiction who gets lost in the woods on his way to a remote drug rehab center and wrestles with the locals as well as his own personal demons. John Lowe not only starred in but also produced the picture and helped to shape the character based on his own experiences, which he has been open about for years.

“I struggled with substance abuse issues growing up, and getting sober, which is coming up on five years, is probably the most important journey I’ve walked in my life,” he said. “Playing a character that was going through something similar and telling a story about it was really important to me.”

Lowe said that taking in the premiere of Grace Point while sitting with his parents and other family and friends in a packed hometown theater was an emotional rollercoaster.

“It is so rewarding and validating and exciting, and I was just elated to get into SBIFF,” he said. “But I’m very self-critical and hyper aware of wanting to present the best version of myself, to a fault, which made it difficult for me to just sit back and enjoy it. But to be in my hometown and be surrounded by a large gathering of people I grew up with and love, to be there to support me was incredible.”

That gratitude extends to growing up in Santa Barbara, which he said has a unique appreciation for the arts given the city’s size.

“Even early on, there were the local artists at Fiesta or the chalk drawings outside of the Mission (at I Madonnari) and lots of local plays,” he recalled, naming a role as the Tin Man in The Wizard of Oz at Marymount as a favorite because he got to tap dance. “Montecito is a tightly knit community, and there’s a certain level of support and appreciation for artists when they’re doing their thing. Now that I’m in L.A., which earns its reputation as a tough talent in many ways, I carry that encouraging energy I grew up with in Montecito and it helps a lot.”

Grace Point has its second screening at 4:20 pm on Saturday, Feb. 18, followed by a Q&A with Lowe and other filmmakers.

Other Local and Large Films to Wrap SBIFF

While SBIFF ’23 is heading for its last lap, two other features from Santa Barbara filmmakers are still to make their debuts, including Vishniac. The latest from San Marcos High School grad Laura Bialis (Rock in the Red Zone, Refusenik), Vishniac is about Roman Vishniac’s daughter’s efforts to preserve the photographer’s legacy. The second high-profile feature is from SB-native