Helping Families Navigate Childhood Sexual Abuse

KKC Cares:

Guiding and Empowering Families Navigating Childhood Sexual Abuse and Its Complex Path

WRITTEN BY JENNIFER K. STRATTMAN

There are some things we don’t talk about. Perhaps we don’t want to imagine the trauma, or maybe we believe such a conversation is inappropriate. However, most of the time, we just don’t have the right words. And, if we don’t discuss it, maybe it will go away. But it never does. One such topic is childhood sexual abuse. According to Khriste Kunz, founder of the nonprofit organization KKC Cares, 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually molested by age 18. So, we need to start the conversation. And the time is now.

THE FOUNDING STORY

Meet Khriste. As a teenager, Khriste’s daughter Morgan reported that she was molested by her stepfather. The authorities didn’t believe her. Instead, the investigation was unsubstantiated, and Morgan’s disclosure was attributed to a host of mental illnesses. Following mental health professionals’ advice, the family waited. But three years later, the abuse recurred, and Morgan reported again. But, because her first report was unfounded, Khriste’s attorney said Morgan had to disclose more information, which she did two weeks later. This time—over three years later—the report was substantiated. But that wasn’t the end for Khriste, Morgan, and their family. Their home life was shattered, and agencies neglected to communicate. For example, one day, Khriste learned that Family Court gave unsupervised visits to Morgan’s siblings, while, at the same time, there was a warrant out for Morgan’s stepfather’s arrest. Khriste was then forced to ask who communicates between supporting agencies like CPS (Child Protective Services) and law enforcement to keep children safe. She was told: “You do.” On her own, Khriste learned social services and law enforcements’ rules, regulations, and nuances. She had to grasp, “how to coordinate and navigate all the systems I [she] never knew about.” Thus, KKC Cares was born: To support, advocate for, and coordinate family needs, post-trauma.

SERVICES

KKC Cares is the only agency in the United States that provides ongoing support groups for non-offending parents and guardians at no cost. They offer clients support, advocacy, and liaison services in the face of childhood sexual abuse. The overarching goal is to guide children and families as they transition “from surviving to thriving.” Much of what they do centers around support, advocacy, and education.

SUPPORT

KKC Cares provides in-person, phone, and online individual and group support for non-offending parents and siblings. Currently, KKC Cares hosts 5 weekly phone support groups and have served 210 people/families over the past year.

ADVOCACY

KKC Cares provides agency and court advocacy, such as attending court with a client, helping clients understand court documents or helping clients do legal research if they are representing themselves.

EDUCATION

The agency is committed to educating both families and support service providers. Many resources are appropriate for different ages and developmental stages.

FOR THE COMMUNITY PARENTS: Know You Are Not Alone.

KKC Cares can help. When a child reports that they have been sexually abused, you might think you will be “protectively ushered through the process.” But as Khriste learned, that doesn’t happen. “We are here for the family who has just found out that they will need to walk this path and are feeling hopeless, angry, confused, or desperate.” KKC Cares.org, 518-504-0547, KKCcares@gmail.com. Email, text, call, or get in touch via the website.

There’s Hope.

Know that in time, you will have the agency to rebuild the home and the family traditions you want. Kunz advises, “Continue to get to know yourself and your kiddos.” The key then is to figure out what you need to do and to find your team.

Reach Out.

If someone you know is being sexually abused, call the National Sexual Abuse Hotline at (800) 656-HOPE (4673) or online at, online.rainn.org.

FRIENDS: Listen. Support. Connect.

As a person who might not have been abused, it might be overwhelming if someone discloses. The best advice Kunz offers is to listen, share that you are sorry/sad it happened, and connect them with agencies that can help.

AGENCIES AND COMMUNITY MEMBERS: Educate

Parents and children need to learn about grooming behavior, the signs, and the ways that children can protect their boundaries. Kunz argues that parents’ first newborn care classes are a great place to start education as awareness should be “common right from birth.” Schools and support agencies also need education about the signs, the legal process, and how childhood sexual abuse impacts families. We need to bring everyone out of the darkness, and shine light on this topic so victims and their families can thrive.

WANT TO HELP? DONATE TO KKCCARES.ORG Every $20 in donation money provides one hour of

advocacy or support services. SF